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*bigailBradbury agony aunt

*bigailBradbury

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Hello there, my name is Abigail Bradbury. (Abbi to my friends) I am nearly 20 years old and I live near Blackpool, Lancashire. I have a 10 month old little girl and she is my entire life. I have a lot of free time because I am a stay at home Mum. I am using my spare time to give advice to you lovely people on this website. I have no qualifications to give you expert advice but being an "agony aunt" has been a dream of mine for years and years. I love listening to people, I like typing and trying to give advice is my favourite hobby. I hope my advice helps! :)

1234Next > [4 pages, 102 answers]

Should I ignore my initiative and go with the flow? 

Q.   So I'm 19 and a virgin with a boyfriend who is 20 and not a virgin. At the beginning of the relationship he said he would wait till I was ready, now 6 months later I think he's getting impatient. It's not that I don't want to it's just I care to ...

A.   16 September 2012: - add on: Oh, and if you do just "do it" to please him, you probably wont feel any better hun, you'll just feel like you did it to please him. ... (read in full...)

Should I ignore my initiative and go with the flow? 

Q.   So I'm 19 and a virgin with a boyfriend who is 20 and not a virgin. At the beginning of the relationship he said he would wait till I was ready, now 6 months later I think he's getting impatient. It's not that I don't want to it's just I care to ...

A.   16 September 2012: You probably feel embarrassed or feel as though you're being silly - you're not. You need to make sure you're ready. Losing your virginity is a huge deal!! I was 16 when I lost mine, and I'm still with the guy now and we have a one year old. I'... (read in full...)

We broke up and he gave a lot of excuses. I am now dating someone else but I don't know if I should give up on him and wait for my ex?

Q.   Dear Cupid, im a confused wreck let me give you a back story about my situation...Last year i began dating Anthony he was 15 and i have just turned 17 it was the best relationship ever he was my bestfriend he was there for me and i was there back i ...

A.   15 September 2012: Sorry to be harsh sweetie, but why break up something that is clearly making you really happy for something that rests on a maybe? Now, ordinarily I'd say follow your heart. However, if this guy wants you, let him chase you. You've had your hear... (read in full...)

Why aren't we spending more time together?

Q.   I have recently quit my job a month ago and during that time I went on two family vacations. Now that things have settled and I am looking for a new job, I have a lot of spare time. My boyfriend and I used to be on opposite schedules with a few ...

A.   15 September 2012: It sounds like he has got the perfect life. Sorry, I am being brutally honest and I know it's hard. But honestly? He gets to fool around with his mates and come and go as he pleases, then he gets the nice woman to settle down with when he clicks h... (read in full...)

She doesn't want sex anymore and says she has no desire. What can I do?

Q.   me and my girl have been together for a year when we first started dating she wanted sex all the time now it's been a year and she don't want sex no more she is 48 years old she tells me she has no desire what can I do...

A.   15 September 2012: I think as you get older, sex becomes less important. It's not about being at it like rabbits anymore, I think love goes deeper then and it's more about settling down. It doesn't necessarily mean she loves you any less. If you really are concerned ... (read in full...)

My teen son is using my lingerie items when he masturbates. How should I handle this delicate situaiton?

Q.   I am a single mom and my 13yr old is using my unwashed lingerie items to "help himself" while he masturbates. I found of my personal lingerie items under his bed and it is clear what he is doing with them. We have alwways been open with one ano...

A.   13 September 2012: The other advise is really good. Don't freak out as this sort of topic is a tough one to address. It will be very embarrassing for your son and it could make things really awkward. If you confront it straight away he will most likely snap and say ... (read in full...)

My neighbor told me he saw my girlfriend sneaking around with my friend. They said no way. Who do I believe?

Q.   A neighbour/casual friend of mine has told me that my girlfriend has cheated on me with one of our good friends. He said he saw him leave the house one day when i was out, and that the guy also told him he had slept with her a while back and that ...

A.   13 September 2012: It sounds as though this person is stirring. If they're watching what's going on in your life then they obviously have too much spare time. They're probably bored with their life and need some juicy gossip so read too much into things. The other ... (read in full...)

I no longer desire sex with my wife but I do desire other women. It's consuming me, help!

Q.   Ok,i'm married,and have lost my desire for sex with my wife,but have a desire to have sex with almost every female i come across! When i meet another woman,even for just a minute,i'm wondering what it would be like to have her! It's consuming ...

A.   13 September 2012: Ok, this sounds like a common problem. When you're married I think some things become routine. I don't mean this to sound awful and I'm not for one moment saying you don't love her, however.. When you first meet a woman it's exciting. You've reac... (read in full...)

I have a girlfriend but I think I want to be with this guy! Does this mean I am gay and what do I do about it?

Q.   I’m 18 years old guy and I’m having a trouble with my orientation. I think I’m in love with a male. It seems so crazy to me, yet it’s true. My father owns a small firm and there’s one worker there who’s driving me crazy. Almost every day I come to ...

A.   13 September 2012: You could just be going through a phase and be curious? I don't mean that to sound harsh or make it seem like this isn't a serious problem because I'm sure to you it's horrible to go through. I'm not sure if by the information you have shared here, ... (read in full...)

We have been hooking up for months, do you think he is starting to develop feelings for me?

Q.   I've been hooking up with a guy friend for about 3 months. We've become so close and I like it a lot. I've started to develope feelings if you couldn't tell and I'm not sure if he has also. He seems to care more; we work together and he's always ...

A.   13 September 2012: You really need to address this. I don't want to put a dampener on your happiness as it sounds like you're smitten and that's great because you sound really happy. However, you need to ask him how he actually feels about you. You are happy with the ... (read in full...)

I gave him my virginity and then he said he wasn't into me!

Q.   okay so I had sex with this huy for the first time. And it was at my house and it was a very special cause he took my virginity. So anyways after that we were talking and we did it again but at his house. So the next day I told him we should stop ...

A.   18 July 2012: This guy sounds awful!! He basically used you and then chucked you. Unfortunately this happens to people a lot :( It's horrible for you especially because you were a virgin before him!! This man was scum, he had no respect for you. :( Just forget ... (read in full...)

I want to invite my friend over for a meal but don't really have the room!

Q.   Dear Aunts (and Uncles), I'm not sure what to do about this dilemna and really need help! I have decided that I REALLY must invite a close friend of mine over to my place and I want to prepare a nice meal for him. The trouble is, I rent a r...

A.   16 July 2012: The other answer was pretty much spot on. What's to say you HAVE to go back to yours. He wouldn't mind I'm sure, else he wouldn't keep inviting you to his would he? Take him out for a meal. Somewhere quiet so you can still chat. I know nothing beat... (read in full...)

Should I contact a long lost love?

Q.   I am thinking about messageing a guy I went out with a long time ago through one of the social networking sites. I think of him often and would love to reconnect with him, the only thing stopping me is the fear that he will reject me or not respond. ...

A.   16 July 2012: What do you really have to lose? It's online so it's not like he can reject you to your face. Go for it I say. "Don't let the fear of striking out keep you from playing the game." Too true. Just message him. Don't think about it too much and just... (read in full...)

My husband wont touch me, and an old boyfriend has reappeared to light the fire!

Q.   I am so confused. I am married for almost 28 years been together for 30 years. I do love my husband but here lies the problem. He does not want to seem to touch me. I admit that I gained some weight during the marriage and was busy raising the kids, ...

A.   15 July 2012: It sounds like you've been together for so long that it's routine and you have become very "comfortable" with each other. He obviously thinks you're at the stage now where you can just be happy around each other and not need sex a lot. This is ... (read in full...)

B/f had picture of his ex in his email. Should I worry?

Q.   My boyfriend and I have been together for 3 years now, and we live together. Just recently he had his e-mail open on my laptop and I found that he had pictures of his ex-girlfriend (who was horrible to him and cheated on him, who he also won't even ...

A.   15 July 2012: I know exactly how you feel love, I went through the same thing. :( It's horrid once you start thinking these things. I was the most paranoid person ever. You never truly lose the paranoia, it just gets easier honey. He hasn't cheated, he loves you ... (read in full...)

Do I still love my husband and want attention?

Q.   I am Planning to split with my husband of 12 years since he's been cheating, controlling and rude and I said I wanted out coz I just felt completely devoid of love for him and even felt I was getting attracted to other men which is very unlike me... ...

A.   14 July 2012: You seem "comfortable" with him. It's routine, you have a family and so you've faced the fact you have a commitment to stay with this guy forever. Ok so if you left him it'd be bad for a while, it'd be hard for the children and it could turn bitter, ... (read in full...)

B/f had picture of his ex in his email. Should I worry?

Q.   My boyfriend and I have been together for 3 years now, and we live together. Just recently he had his e-mail open on my laptop and I found that he had pictures of his ex-girlfriend (who was horrible to him and cheated on him, who he also won't even ...

A.   14 July 2012: You have to remember honey, she's an ex for a reason. And if he says he's over her then trust him. You have to trust him otherwise the paranoia will send you insane. Don't worry unless he's in contact with her. He's with you not her. Life is too s... (read in full...)

My fiance was killed in the army and I don't know how to make myself keep going

Q.   I'm a CNA working overtime constantly to keep my mind occupied while my fiance has been in the Army. I've been working towards my nursing degree when I got the worst news any young woman whose man is in the military could get. Its been a month since ...

A.   14 July 2012: I can't say "I understand" and I'm not 'qualified' to give advice on this situation because I DON'T understand. I dread to think what you're going through. But I will be honest, and I will try to help. You need to find support from others around y... (read in full...)

Does this married older woman want to sleep with me?

Q.   Ok im 21 and i work in an office with only one other male, all the rest are female. There is one woman in the office who is constantly flirting with me and complimenting me--and i mean outrageously. At a recent night out too she stayed with me all ...

A.   14 July 2012: Ask yourself this... Even if she does want to sleep with you; do you really want to get in to that. She's married right? So you could destroy a whole family for the sake of a one night stand. It sounds as if she likes the attention and she knows you ... (read in full...)

Confused boyfriend? Or is he just making me wait to be dumped?

Q.   Hi all, My boyfriend of 4 months has recently been acting weird (the past 2 weeks). He hasn't shown any affection, he has been cancelling plans to see me and he has avoided calls, simply texting me that he needs to think and that he needs space. ...

A.   14 July 2012: What right does this guy have to make you wait to see if his issues will affect things! You are right, you have a right to know where you stand. Call him and tell him how it's making you feel. You can't wait around because it's hurting you. Fair ... (read in full...)

I did the wrong thing. but so did she by flirting and cheating. Where do I go from here with the relationship?

Q.   Hi, i have been in a relationship with this girl for 3 good years. i recently started suspecting something as she never wanted me to touch her phone. i kept it cool till one day i decided to just grab it and see what was the reason. what i found wa...

A.   14 July 2012: You two sounds so wrong for each other. I know you say you love her but this seems like a destructive relationship. You were violent and she can't be faithful. What is left? I know it's hard to hear, and I'm so sorry for being this blunt but I want... (read in full...)

My peers pick on me for not dating in my age group, but I'm only attracted to older men/

Q.   So I'm seventeen(Will be eighteen in a few months) and I am not at all attracted to guys my age. I only have crushes on men thirty and older. I have accepted this by now whether it because I have "daddy issues" as someone once told me or not. The ...

A.   13 July 2012: I think people saying you need to see someone professional about this is a little harsh... It's not a psychological problem it's a life choice. If you have experience of dating men your age and it going wrong then obviously you are going to tarnish ... (read in full...)

Why is it that I always like guys who don't like me and ignore those who really like me?

Q.   Dear Aunts. I got a problem here with myself. Why is it that i always like guys who dont like me and ignore those who really like me? Then at the end i always get heartbroken and i dont know how to deal with this matter. I know i might be young for ...

A.   12 July 2012: You ARE young like you said. You need to just go with the flow honey. There is nothing wrong with you. You will learn from your experiences and your mistakes. You will come to realise what kind of person you are compatible with and you will strive ... (read in full...)

My peers pick on me for not dating in my age group, but I'm only attracted to older men/

Q.   So I'm seventeen(Will be eighteen in a few months) and I am not at all attracted to guys my age. I only have crushes on men thirty and older. I have accepted this by now whether it because I have "daddy issues" as someone once told me or not. The ...

A.   12 July 2012: You shouldn't go for just one particular age. Just go with the flow and find someone you are compatible with. Maybe you feel that people your age are just too immature and you want someone older because you feel that they would respect you more, and ... (read in full...)

If b/f was over ex why would he even be talking about her?

Q.   Dear Cupid, Last night i was hanging out with my boyfriend and some topics came up that kind of upset me. First off... our relationship is fairly new and we've only been dating for around several months. I know that he got out of a long term rela...

A.   11 July 2012: Look, you have to realise hun that this ex is purely that for a reason!! This is in the past. He was obviously hurt by her leaving, as anyone would be. It does not mean that you are not adequate enough for him at all. You need to support him and ... (read in full...)

Should I try and contact him or leave it?

Q.   I had a one night stand with my friend’s house mate; he is new to this country and has been known to be usually shy. But on that night he had drank a lot. He told me he couldn’t find his phone and did not know his number as he had only been in the ...

A.   9 July 2012: If he agreed to a coffee then just go and see what happens. You have nothing to lose. You don't know him very well so make sure it's in a public place. x... (read in full...)

My friend cheated on her husband, should I tell him?

Q.   I have a "friend" who has admitted to me that she has cheated on her husband before they got married last Sept. Though I do enjoy her company, I'm not close with her. I was rather shocked that she would tell me something like this because my fiancee ...

A.   9 July 2012: If you are not close to this woman then what do you have to lose? Yes you may feel it isn't your place to tell him but like you said he deserves to know. If someone knew your partner had cheated, you'd be angry if they didn't tell you right? How ... (read in full...)

My partner wont let me touch my own baby girl! How do I get him to stop this?

Q.   me and my man just had a baby girl about 3 months ago. he will not let me touch her,i have held her only 2 times since she was born and fed her once and that was at the hospital. last night i thought he was asleep so i went to her crib and picked ...

A.   9 July 2012: Wow. This is a strange one. I have a 10 month old baby girl and it brought a tear to my eye reading this, perhaps because I am a Mother myself. This is so sad hun. 3 months and you've barely held your baby?! This is not right at all. I agree wit... (read in full...)

Would it be odd to want to be "friends with benefits" with my ex?

Q.   Would it be odd to want to be "friends with benefits" with my ex? Back when we were dating I asked him if it was okay for us to become "friends with Benefits" if we were ever to break up and he said yes. It's a been a few months now since our break ...

A.   9 July 2012: You will end up getting attached and being hurt, especially if he finds another girl. Don't be so desperate that you will just give yourself to someone just because you are lonely chick. Wait and find someone who respects you. x... (read in full...)

I want to fall in love with him but I'm scared...

Q.   ok so i've been with my boyfriend 7 weeks and been seeing him for 10 weeks in total. we've agreed to go slow (emotionally) as we have both been hurt in the past and we dont wanna rush things. But I fall very easily (normally) but this time I haven'...

A.   9 July 2012: You seem very naive. This is not a bad thing. But you will get hurt if you fall so quickly. Do not give yourself so readily to a man. You will regret it. Just go with the flow. He is right. There is no rush you are young. If it's meant to be then ... (read in full...)

I'm not sure who my baby's father is.

Q.   I am 20 years old and just had my first child. She was born March 27 2012 . Problem is is I don't know who her father is. I had sex May 30 2011 with my ex boyfriend e and on June 29 2011 with my current boyfriend. I remember the doctors giving me an ...

A.   9 July 2012: ... DNA. I know you're probably looking for an easy answer hun but you need to be sure. Yes, you can try and calculate dates and stuff but you'll never truly be sure. I'm afraid this is what happens when you have sex within a few months and can'... (read in full...)

How can I find out if he'd like to go for a drink with me, I don't even know whether or not he's gay?

Q.   OK. This might sound comparatively trivial in light of some other posts, and perhaps a bit of a cliche as well. Anyway. There's a guy in a shop in my town. He's very attractive, has a great smile... you know the thing. I've been in there severa...

A.   9 July 2012: You say you're not confident but darling, you will only gain confidence by experiences. Bite the bullet. Talk to him. I'm not saying jump in straight away and ask him out but start talking and ask about his life etc. Just make friendly conversation. ... (read in full...)

I need advice, I feel stuck in this relationship!

Q.   i am a 58 yr old black female living with a 53yr old black male.we have had our ups and downs,i first moved in with him, and we lived together for 7mos.we just recently moved back in together been here for 3months now,i feel that our relationship is ...

A.   9 July 2012: It sounds like everything has kind of become routine for you two. Living together is hard and it adds pressure. You are confined to four walls together, and it can make rows seem so much bigger than they actually are. If you ever doubt your hap... (read in full...)

How can I be attracted to him and Not be attracted to him at the same time?

Q.   Hi all! Thanks for taking out time to read my problem and helping me out with it. My problem is as follows: So I know this person,A, since we were kids. we are family friends and we've grown up together. But during middle school he we...

A.   9 July 2012: Maybe it's just the fantasy of what COULD be between you that is making you think there is something there. If you think you're too alike in the fact you both have very similar traits, and you are doubting whether you'd be good together then clearly ... (read in full...)

How do I make this awful feeling go away?

Q.   I have been dating a man for about 6 months, we were friends for 6 months before that. He lived with a woman for 15-17 years before we meet, (they broke up 1 year before we started dating) At some point they became engaged. I do not know much ...

A.   9 July 2012: Relationships are all about honesty. It's only natural that you want to know all about his past and his relationships. However, you must realise that exes are "exes" for a reason and that he is obviously moving on. He may well be insecure if she is ... (read in full...)

I'm still in love with my ex but we broke up 2 years ago, help me!

Q.   I've met someone four years ago, we stayed together for 2 years then kept going in and out of the relationship. I can't forget, I can't move on. I need to kill this love in my heart. The mind got forget but the heart just won't let go. I know it is ...

A.   9 July 2012: Only you will know what is best. It depends what your feelings on life are, and whether you believe that "life is too short" or that "people in the past are there for a reason". Are you a risk taker? You need to ask yourself whether the cons... (read in full...)

Am I over reacting? He's chatting to other women and telling them he loves them!

Q.   I've been with my boyfriend for 8 1/2 yrs and I recently discovered he is chatting with women from the Phillippines via webcam again. This is something we got into several arguments about 4 years ago (and he promised to stop) and now I've discovered ...

A.   11 March 2012: THIS IS SO NOT YOU OVER REACTING! He sounds so manipulating. Sounds like if you confront him he will turn it on you, and make you think you're being silly. Get out honey. You've been with him a very long time, I know that it's easy for me to say l... (read in full...)

I'm still in love with my ex but we broke up 2 years ago, help me!

Q.   I've met someone four years ago, we stayed together for 2 years then kept going in and out of the relationship. I can't forget, I can't move on. I need to kill this love in my heart. The mind got forget but the heart just won't let go. I know it is ...

A.   11 March 2012: Well honey, unfortunately you can't "kill" your feelings; you can't choose who you love. You obviously had many good times with this person, many good memories. and that's obviously over riding the fact that they are an "ex". 'Time is a healer' ... (read in full...)

I said yes to going out with him but it doesn't feel right! Have I made the right choice?

Q.   My good friend asked me out today and I said yes, but it doesnt feel right. He's like my brother, and its just too awkward. Have I made the right choice? Im 13. I dont actually feel anything. Should I just see where it goes?...

A.   14 February 2012: Don't just stay with him just because you don't want to hurt his feelings. It's more cruel to lead him on. The more time you spend as his girlfriend the more he'll grow to love you. If you don't feel anything now, you can't make yourself feel ... (read in full...)

Should I leave my boyfriend for a guy who I still have feelings for but it never worked out in the past?

Q.   Hello:) I'm having trouble with relationships. I was going out with this guy a few years ago, lets call him 'Mat' then I started hanging round with a new friendship group and pretty much fell in love with someone in the group. I didn't do anyth...

A.   14 February 2012: No. Do not end it. You answered the question for yourself. This other guy is an EX hun. There's a reason he's an ex. If things are going well with the new guy, don't end it for something that "might be good". Think about if you got back with your ... (read in full...)

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