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Want to help people and enjoy it. Stay safe and make sure, true love is self love first.

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How can I get rid of our anxieties and start to date?

Q.   I really like this guy I met online. We have spoken a lot and he's asked to meet me. I am extremely shy and it (has) taken me a while to get comfortable with meeting new people. Sometimes it stops me meeting people because I get so worried about ...

A.   13 January 2017: AS someone with a lot of first date experience, honey, DO NOT MEET AT A STRANGER'S HOME. Everyone is a stranger til you meet them. Meet at a public place. If you are shy, its okay to say your shy and openly admit you are new to this. Being vu... (read in full...)

Boyfriend of 5 months constantly mentions how good looking he is

Q.   Dear Cupid, I (25 years old) have recently started going out with a 26 year old guy. He is a gentleman, treats me well, but I've noticed one red flag (or at least, I think it is a red flag) about him. He constantly mentions how good looking he ...

A.   13 January 2017: He showers you with compliments and treats you well, but I think hes super insecure inside and boasts about his looks to see if you will compliment him. Hes seeking your approval-- he wants you to agree and stroke his ego. It sounds like hes doing ... (read in full...)

How should I act towards him for the best outcome?

Q.   A while ago I kissed someone from work who I had liked for a while. He told me he had feelings for me and we began texting. -But then later said because his ex works at the same place nothing could happen. And then kissed a different co wor...

A.   9 January 2017: The lesson here is do not date your co-worker. Keep it professional at the workplace. ... (read in full...)

Don't want this to get out of hand. Should I let this messaging everyday friendship develop?

Q.   Hello everyone. I'm a 19 year old female, looking for some wisdom, perhaps telling me what I instinctively know myself but I just need somebody else's perspective. I've recently gone to university and made a great male friend, and currently...

A.   9 January 2017: NO. Do not get involve with someone who does drugs and sleeps around. Stay friend and keep it platonic. If I was 19 and going to school, that is the advice I didnt want to hear but NEEDED to hear. Good luck, stay in school, hang out with the righ... (read in full...)

I still think he cares. How can I convince him that I am fine? Or should I even try?

Q.   I was in a five year relationship with a man I loved. He lived with me in my home and we did everything together. We saw a counselor together because we had broken up in the past. In one session the counselor made some comment about my memory ...

A.   9 January 2017: Sweetheart, I am sorry this happened to you. But if a man has decided to leave instead of chosing to love, give you compassion, and understanding---then he is not the right man for you. If he was with you and loved you and knew you had some mem... (read in full...)

Do women dream about male virgins too?

Q.   Dear female cupids Many men dream of making love to a virgin Girl and teach her all about sex. Do women dream about male virgins too? Personally I haven't had this Kind of desire, although i lost my own virginity to another virgin. My ...

A.   9 January 2017: Yes, and I have made love to two virgins. And it wasnt that great to be honest. I think its a fantasy to make a guy cum or to take him for first time and wow him...but the woman isnt satisfied usually with a virgin. My experience is that the best ... (read in full...)

We enjoy each other's company but nothing seems to be starting! Any advice, aunties?

Q.   In April last year I met a guy at a local sports club I go to and over the course of the last few months we've built up a friendship and now regularly see each other outside our sports club. We're both single and in our 30s and at the start of las...

A.   9 January 2017: I agree with N91. If a guy is interested, you betcha he is asking you out and seeing how things go. He may be shy and eager in person as well. After my dates, I usually know if a guy is interested or not. After not hearing about 4 days after a ... (read in full...)

I'm looking for feedback on my decision to break up with my boyfriend!

Q.   Hello Everyone! I am truly at a crossroads in my life. I am 20, about to turn 21, graduating an entire year early from a pretty rigorous liberal arts college. Back in October I broke up with my 3-year, mainly long distance boyfriend, whom ...

A.   6 January 2017: Your question is up my alley, Ive been down that path. I think honestly only you can know if you did the right decision by breaking up with him but you miss him, you sound like you love him still but its long distance. How far away is he from you? ... (read in full...)

Is my jealousy justified?

Q.   Hello aunts. I am writing this because I really need help with a recent situation that I am just not handling well. Thanks in advance. First, some background. I'm 30 and I met my current wife two years ago in a business dinner. We flirted a bit an...

A.   2 January 2017: Look, the real answer here is you chased the girl, you GOT her, she said yes and married you. Everything else is irrelevant. If you see everyday that she loves YOU more and more, that is only proof that none of the other guys matter. They are... (read in full...)

Why has my Boyfriend changed his sexual style to a more conservative one, to the style he favoured previously? Could he be cheating?

Q.   Hello friends. I have been in a long term relationship with my boyfriend. We have always had a good time experimenting with each other sexually. We have a good bond and have connected from the get go. And we have also had stellar chemistry and a gr...

A.   29 December 2016: Sounds like an amazing relationship. And he probably is stressed outside of the relationship, whether its work or family issues. It sounds like right there with you, he just wanted to be himself and not role play. He wanted to be made love to and ... (read in full...)

Messy situation with my housemate...we had sex and were almost a couple and now he doesn't want anything to do with me

Q.   I need help! I've gotten myself into a really stupid situation with a guy and I have no idea how to behave with him! I moved into a new place around 7 months ago, sharing with three new housemates. I'd initially thought one of them (a guy) was...

A.   29 December 2016: I think you deserve some compassion but honestly sweetheart, Im going to give you some tough love. What the hell are you thinking will happen when you moved into a place and start sleeping with one of your housemates? You stated there was obviou... (read in full...)

Is AB more important to my Bf than he implies? I believe he loves me. But I only sharing him with AB?

Q.   My boyfriend and I have been dating for 4 years and some change. When I left for college he became really close with a female friend( I'll call her AB). I do know her but I don't know her that well because we were never friends we just all kno...

A.   29 December 2016: Why are you with him? You are the girlfriend. You are the number one girl. If he doesnt make you feel that way--end it swiftly and gently. Any opposite sex friends immediately become secondary after your partner. I have many many guyfrien... (read in full...)

My marriage is emotionally unfulfilling and dead. Should I stay or leave?

Q.   I'm in a marriage that could be described as comfortable . Both of us treat each other very nicely , the sex is good on a physical level ( although no emotional component really ) and we have built an good life together over twenty year . The ...

A.   29 December 2016: I fear the exact same situation you face as I get old. Thank you honestly, for being so open about what you are facing. But I will say, people are what they show themselves to be the first time. So many men crave emotional closeness and in... (read in full...)

I love her but don't know to what extent I love her

Q.   I am facing a dilemma. Whether to marry, or to leave my girlfriend. I am inexperienced, and I need your opinion on what our relationship looks like to you, and what you think I should do. I also would like to hear what you think is important in a ...

A.   19 December 2016: Agree with N91. If you have to convince yourself to marry someone, please do them a favor and break it off. You should marry someone because no other girl comes close to who she is and what she gives you. You should marry someone for passion and for ... (read in full...)

How can I know if I'll be open to a boyfriend being sexually polygamous?

Q.   I don't have a BF right now, and I have actually never had a boyfriend before. However, I realized that there are many men out there that cheat, not because they don't love their GF enough, (or so I think), but because they just love to have variety ...

A.   15 December 2016: WOW. Clapping after reading WiseOwl's post. He hit right on the nail! Please re-read that advice again and again.... (read in full...)

We've never met but after three months of chatting she says she loves me

Q.   There is a woman whom I met online, who lives in another country. We communicated for quite a bit of time without meeting in person. After about 3 months of emailing, and one Skype call, she told me she loved me. She asked how I felt. I said I liked ...

A.   8 December 2016: Women are emotional. When i was 18 I talked to a guy online for about 8 months and confessed that I love him. We never met, not even skyped, just saw photos. But I thought of him everyday and actually thought he was my soulmate but that we somehow ... (read in full...)

Am I in love with a creep? Should I get out now?

Q.   I have been with my boyfriend for over two years. We have travelled the world together and have always been very happy. We have spoken about getting engaged and where we will settle down to raise our family. He has always treated me with respect ...

A.   7 December 2016: No its not creepy at all. Hes in love with legs, so be it. Many men watch porn still even when they are still in relationships, your man's porn is legs so thats pretty much it. Theres not much to take from this except that he loves legs and it turns ... (read in full...)

How do I finally get over her?

Q.   Hi Agony Aunts I am a 26 year old man. I got married at 19 a large part of that was because we got pregnant. She was my first girlfriend. We were together 1 day short of 7 years, married a bit more than 5 of those. About 18 months ago she left...

A.   30 November 2016: Its hard because she sounds like she was your first love and lover. Those are the hardest to forget, they are the ones that have a lasting impact on our love life and how we see love. I remember my first love like it was just yesterday. That said... (read in full...)

I'm in love with my husband's cousin

Q.   My husband and I have been married for 6 months, but have been together for 9 years. Throughout our relationship my husband's cousin, we'll call him Tyler, has always been close with us. We have all always been great friends until he moved out of ...

A.   30 November 2016: Sometimes we develop feelings for people due to circumstances. He's leaving your place, he has a GF, there are many signs here that you should recognize your feelings is only a crush and not more than that. You have no place to tell him how you ... (read in full...)

I'm cheating but there's only one life

Q.   I'm a guy who is happily married in a long term relationship. While sex can sometimes be an issue between us- she has a very low sex drive- and it's often a discussion/argument that we have, it's not so bad that I would consider ending the ...

A.   29 November 2016: So many darn stupid excuses ! Only one life---BULLSHIT! Only one life, so should we stop working, chuck it all, go live on a boat and sail out into the open sea. Only one LIFE! So should we eat all most delicious food in the world regardless... (read in full...)

My head is turning! how do stop this?

Q.   I have been in a relationship for over 3 years. Our relationship has always been a bit turbulent. We have had issues as all relationships will suffer through from time to time, but we have always stuck it out and gotten through. We lived toget...

A.   29 November 2016: No dont contact the german woman. There are so many red flags there, shes not in your country nor do you know if shes single. sure it was a fun night but leave it there. Plus youre taken. What if you break up with current gf to pursue this girl and ... (read in full...)

Should I feel guilty that I seen someone else while we were broken up?

Q.   I am currently in a loving relationship with someone who I've been with for 3 years and we are now talking about marriage. However, in that three years, we've broken up twice... once for 3 weeks the other for 3 months, both my choice because I...

A.   28 November 2016: No, you shouldnt feel guilt at all. And also you were open with current BF and he took you back, gear those energy into loving him and just appreciating him. Whats in the past is in the past =)... (read in full...)

Why was he being so open if all he wanted from me was sex?

Q.   Hi Everyone, I meet this guy online February 2016. We meet up in March. We both have 9yr old girls, have stuff in common. We hit it off staright away. We meet up every weekend...days out with our children. By April it got very intease, we were...

A.   28 November 2016: This hardly is a guy or female thing. We open up because were human. It sounds like he met you and there were so many things in common, he couldnt help but just express who he is. It sounds like he likes you but his heart is not entirely in it or ... (read in full...)

Truse issues, especially with older men. How can I find a healthy balance and deal effectively with this pressure?

Q.   I'm starting to have trouble trusting men, especially older men. Being in a work environment where I am usually the only woman in the department, and a still semi-young one at that, I tend to get the attention from older colleagues. I'm sure mos...

A.   23 November 2016: I want to say this, for every creepy unethical man out there, there is a good ethical man out there. You do the math. I wont discount that you are experiencing harassment and unwanted attention, but you shouldnt build a wall and form distrust... (read in full...)

Our online relationship ...

Q.   I met this American guy online since August 2015 and we met in a famous dating site. Btw, I’m Asian and 23 years old and we are of the same age. First, it was just purely a friendly chat of random stuffs (we chat almost every day as long as we are ...

A.   21 November 2016: Ive seen many successful relationships between American men and women from overseas. If hes invested this much in you, Id say its pretty much a guarantee he wants you in his life. I have seen quite a few men fly over to Phillipines and then bring ... (read in full...)

I'm having a hard time getting over her

Q.   I've posted about this female in questions a few times before. Basically I'm having a really hard time getting over her and I'm questioning my sanity and what else I can do to get over how I'm feeling. To cut a long story short, a FWB that didn't ...

A.   21 November 2016: I've read alot of your post and you have great insights too N91. I remember a lovely article by you about the fact that not all love is here to stay but to teach us a lesson in life. I completely agree with that. That being said, I wanna say, the... (read in full...)

Boyfriend's excuse made me feel belittled

Q.   The other night my boyfriend and I had plans for dinner. We talked about it in the morning and he seemed super excited about it. Well later on in the morning his friends asked if he could do a boys night in which he responded with “I don’t feel like ...

A.   17 November 2016: Hes probably giving you shit about it to see how you would respond. You can serious and be hurt by it or you can smile and say 'Babe, you did the right thing. =P' or 'Pssst, those guys aint got nothing on me'. and laugh with him! and make him never ... (read in full...)

Do women like men with deep voices?

Q.   This girl at work, she's a sweetheart, always looks so positive and full of energy. I've been feeling like she avoids me a lot, so one day I talked to her about it and though she was really friendly, she said that i was a bit intimidating, my voice ...

A.   16 November 2016: No its not intimidating but it can make girls take notice of the man and feel 'girly.' Much like I think some men prefer feminine voices...but deep doesnt necessarily mean its a pleasant voice. Its how pleasurable to our ear the deep voice is, that ... (read in full...)

Why have her habits towards me changed so drastically?

Q.   I will try and make this as short and sweet as I can. First off I just want to say that in the last couple of months I have become a very anxious person towards the woman i become enveloped with. Just 6 months ago i could care less about if a wom...

A.   15 November 2016: I think youre following the dating 'rules' a little closely. I have heard of people who follow rules...then met the love of their life and everything went out the window. Everything they knew about waiting 3 days before texting or waiting a few ... (read in full...)

Six years and no proposal; we've lived together for two. Is he stringing me along?

Q.   I love my partner of 6 years. A few years into the relationship he suggested we bought a house together (at the time he had just finished his service in the military, and I was finishing University - he had saved up a house deposit during his time ...

A.   14 November 2016: Why did you move in with him w/ no marriage on table? I agree with Brownwolf, only YOU are stringing yourself along. Even if he loved you, hes not full-filling your needs. And you being quiet all this time, says something about who you are. Its been ... (read in full...)

How to avoid being tempted?

Q.   Hello, Here is an interesting one for you. I am married (with kids). My wife is very beautiful (former Miss), we have great sex - I can get it on demand, whatever I want, I think I love her, surely I wouldn't want to hurt her. Yet, I can't sto...

A.   14 November 2016: I didnt want to say anything because I WiseOwl and Brownwolf said it all and everyone else had a good input. But I think youre wife is giving it to you too good and shes allowing you to have it all time. Time for her to pull back and have you work a ... (read in full...)

Is my boyfriend a massive jerk who doesn’t care?

Q.   My boyfriend doesn't seem to care about me or get upset when genuinely bad things happen to me. I've had a massive argument with him today and I'm wondering if it's because he's a total jerk or do most people get this way when they can't handle a ...

A.   14 November 2016: Rape is a serious issue, but if it went to trial and if you won, had support, had your boyfriend's support, family's support and went to therapy and feel like youre over it, then I have to ask you why you have to bring it up? It is a sensitive issue ... (read in full...)

Will watching X-rated movies affect my married life?

Q.   hey I am indulged in bad sex activities like watching X movies and doing all that stuff …… I want to know will it affect my married life if I continue to do so. please help me...

A.   14 November 2016: YES it will ruin your marriage if youre addicted and use it replace your wife/sex. But if you are only viewing it with her and as a source of fun/pleasure, then it wouldnt ruin it. Many couples enjoy watching porn together and that is healthy. But ... (read in full...)

Why does he never offer to pay for the hotel?

Q.   I travel quite a lot and 3-4 times a year I fly through one country where I met a guy who I really like. Sometimes it's a lay over, sometimes it's a couple days stay. We always meet and it's usually just amazing. Sex is amazing and I really enj...

A.   10 November 2016: Why buy cow when you can get the milk for free? Essentially youve been offering and just paying so hes going along with it. Hes an active participant but he also orders food. AND on top of that, he prob assumes you want this as much as he does so ... (read in full...)

Does he have too much baggage?

Q.   I'm dating a guy that is a 100% gentleman, is God-fearing, has a great job, is goal-driven and has committed to being celibate with me..But, he is divorced (for 5 years now), and has two children (10 years old and 7 years old). He's 33, so I can ...

A.   10 November 2016: LOL did you just his 'kids' baggage? If Im a divorced mother, with 2 kids, great job, great personality and a man Im dating who is single with no kids ...called my kids 'baggage'---Id kick him to the curb so fast he didnt see it coming =) I ... (read in full...)

My heart belongs to another and I want out of my marriage but I won't be able to support myself/kids

Q.   I am married and have been for 10 years. I have three beautiful children that I love more than anything. I stay home to care for them, as one of them is too young for school. Here is my dilemma. I am not in love with my husband. I haven't been for ...

A.   10 November 2016: I think there is something to take away from Fatherly Advice's advice. You say you have nothing in common with your husband and all you do is argue, but I dont see that he is abusing you or neglecting his family (he is providing money and weal... (read in full...)

Why isnt he replying the date is 3 days away

Q.   I have arranged a date with a man i know ( we dont see each other out its more of a facebook friendship ) the date is set for this weekend . I have messaged him to confirm times and place to meet but he hasnt replied for a week ! why would someone ...

A.   9 November 2016: No reply in 3 days? Its easy as cake. Cut your losses and move on. No pain no gain.... (read in full...)

Does my girlfriend take any responsibility in our relationship?

Q.   Hey dearcupid readers, Just wanted some thoughts on this. I'm a guy and I've been with my girlfriend for almost three years; we are still at university but living together off campus. I love her dearly but recently something that has been going o...

A.   8 November 2016: This questions made me cringe. Shes not at all traditional, shes just immature and spoiled. I think by everything youve told us, you seem like a great sweet loving GIVING boyfriend, but youve ENABLED all her bad behavior. You allow her to take and ... (read in full...)

How can I stop beating myself up for making same mistake twice?

Q.   I recently was dating an awesome person and long story short, I wrecked my chances with them and turned them off completely. It's unfixable, trust me. If this mistake was something I had never learned about before, I'd just say "I just didn't know...

A.   8 November 2016: I'd suggest explaining that mistake so we can help you thru that process but if its something embarrassing, i understand your need to keep it private. That said, what youre experiencing is part of dating. Everyone makes mistakes. It makes us... (read in full...)

How can I ever trust my husband?

Q.   Hello about 2 weeks ago I wrote about my husband going away for training and me not being able to trust him. For reasons like him texting a escort. But when he came home I felt I should let go and maybe try to trust him. But then 2 days later I ...

A.   7 November 2016: You need boundaries hun. IDK how long youve been enabling his cheating and complete lack of respect for you but it sounds like its been going on for way too long. You cant change overnight thats for sure. You need help and self esteem and much much ... (read in full...)

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