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Too often we underestimate the power of a touch, a smile, a kind word, a listening ear, an honest compliment, or the smallest act of caring, all of which have the potential to turn a life around.

Latest articles:

Just Two

This question has 3 answers by readers of DearCupid.ORG.
Newest answer was posted

31 March 2011: I recently read something nice that I would like to share.... JUST TWO. Donate blood twice a year. Donate your eyes after death. Thank God twice a day. Write two letters a week. Visit two ailing people a month. Say two words of gratitude-"...

A little humility goes a long way

This question has 8 answers by readers of DearCupid.ORG.
Newest answer was posted

27 March 2011: I’ve been a moderator here on DC for a while and it’s a great forum. It really irritates me though when the OP shows no regard for the aunts who’ve taken time to answer questions. We moderators don’t know you, yet we spend time poring over ever...

1234567891011Next > [45 pages, 1773 answers]

How can I get my current Gf to trust me? I've not cheated on her. But I did cheat on my ex.

Q.   I cheated on my first love two years ago with my current girlfriend. I broke up with my first love to set her free from my cheating ways. I still love her and check her social media accounts to see how she's doing but I never told her I cheated wh...

A.   18 January 2017: I'm surprised that's your problem when you have greater things to worry about! You're still in love with your ex and you have an unhealthy relationship with your current girlfriend. You can't let her blackmail you forever! What if she insists ... (read in full...)

I’m angry with his mom and his sister and have reached a breaking point. I need input!

Q.   Hello everyone, This is a long so please bear with me. I live with my boyfriend and his sister. Some background info: his sister is the youngest. She is a bit spoiled by her parents and doesn't have friends for various reasons. She's a princes...

A.   18 January 2017: While the behavior does sound extremely odd, here's my take on the matter. As long as you're living in your boyfriend's family house, irrespective of whether or not you're paying rent, you're "under" their thumb. If you're paying rent then... (read in full...)

I fear he doesn’t like what I consider to be my best trait.

Q.   Well, this is a minor problem compared to most of the problems on here. I would never leave my boyfriend over this, but it is rather an annoying thing is that I think he really doesn’t like my eyes…let me explain. Maybe I am bothered because...

A.   17 January 2017: This is like hunting for problems when there are none! OK let's for a moment assume that he doesn't like your eyes. So what? He likes other things about you and he's your boyfriend who loves you. Isn't that enough? The past boyfriends loved ga... (read in full...)

I'm panicking my boyfriend will cheat on a guy's trip to Cuba. How should I respond or act in this situation?

Q.   My boyfriend is in Cuba for one week on a guy's trip. I am beside myself with worry that he is going to cheat. I have read that prostitutes are around every corner there and they are dirt cheap. The anxiety is hard to take. I contact him a...

A.   16 January 2017: Hey that's not a very nice thing to say about Cuba! There are temptations everywhere, possibly even in the place where your boyfriend works or in the house next door. Why give Cuba a bad name? If he had to, he would cheat right under your nose and ... (read in full...)

Should I be concerned ? He came home from his class, wearing cologne

Q.   My boyfriend is a self defense instructor at our gym. He teaches an hour class one evening each week voluntarily. I noticed this evening that he came home from his class, wearing cologne. This is the first time that I have ever noticed him wea...

A.   12 January 2017: Forget the cologne, I'd be more worried about how low your level of trust is in your boyfriend. If his wearing cologne made you uncomfortable to the extent of asking for advice for strangers on the internet then something is obviously not right with ... (read in full...)

Should I tell my ex that feelings have resurfaced for him even though we are both married to others?

Q.   Hi guys! My ex-partner and I separated amicably over a decade ago, and keep in contact and remain friendly towards one another for the sake of our fifteen year old daughter, whom we co-parent. Our relationship, which lasted for about eight years, f...

A.   11 January 2017: You had your chance with him, you were married to him...and you didn't fight enough for it. Even though you lost a child, you still had...have...a daughter and you should have tried to save the relationship as best as you could. You're incredib... (read in full...)

I always fear something bad is waiting for me

Q.   Hey all! I have a dog of 2 years. I love her like a baby and so does my family. Sometimes I just watch her sleeping and worry about how long she will live. I want her to complete the 15 year mark and don't want to lose her young- of course if I h...

A.   9 January 2017: OMG...this post could have been written by me a few years back! My entire family and I were completely obsessed with our dog as well, and no one thought of her as a "dog"..she was the baby of the family. When we had guests over, she would si... (read in full...)

Are my feelings justified or am I making a mountain out of a mole hill?

Q.   I'm really needed your honest opinions.. My boyfriend and I have officially been together for around four months. we knew each-other somewhat before this, however due to us both coming out of serious long term relationships, resulting in bot...

A.   8 January 2017: Why didnt you ask him immediately why your parties are different and why does he think he's entitled to come to them? Anyway, now that you didn't, don't bring this up. Just simply don't invite him to your parties and if he wants to go, tell him... (read in full...)

Why does my boyfriend appear uncomfortable around his subordinate?

Q.   Hi. So there's this woman my boyfriend works with. He is actually her boss. At a social gathering around Christmas, I noticed he looked uncomfortable around her. I asked him about this. He said he thinks she likes him (more than a professional ...

A.   7 January 2017: If you don't stop with your paranoia, you'll only drive him away. There's no cheating, no sleeping around, nothing sinister going on. The only thing that's happening is that you're going overboard assuming the worst and I'm surprised you've thought ... (read in full...)

My friend said something during our casual encounter - criticism or a compliment?

Q.   So me and my friend have had sex a couple of times. There are no feelings there at all. We are just good friends, are single, and have ended up sleeping together after drinking. All was well, but she made one comment that made me a little bit ...

A.   7 January 2017: Most certainly a compliment. There are no rules for casual sex...You can be as affectionate or detached as you want because it's like a deal with no feelings involved. You both have sex when you feel the need for it and then go your separate... (read in full...)

I'm worried that his mother will say something mean in Spanish about me!

Q.   My boyfriend and I have been dating for 6 months. So far he's has met my family but for the most part they like him. But I haven't met his mom yet (I met his younger brother and sister). She doesn't speak english well and I'm really anxious about ...

A.   7 January 2017: Why would you assume that she would say something nasty about you? There's no good reason to! Why are you so sceptical that she won't like you? And let's for a second think that even if she does, you can't stop her, can you? If she doesn't like you ... (read in full...)

After my past life I can't face his sexual demands

Q.   I am 42 and have been through a lot. I have been rapped when I was younger and beat by my mom and almost every guy I have been with. I need help trying to figure out something. My boyfriend gets mad at me for not wanting to do a 3-some. I ha...

A.   6 January 2017: You'll need a new pair of boots because you're going wear these ones out from kicking this ass*@#$ of a boyfriend out of your life. That's what he deserves for forcing you for a threesome. ... (read in full...)

The phone messages he's been receiving from her do bother me. But how do I raise the issue with my husband?

Q.   Hello I am a woman in my late 20's who has been married for 2 years. I have a problem and don't know how to handle it. My husband back when we were first dating over 4 years ago had cheated on me with a woman he was friends with at a drunken par...

A.   5 January 2017: Of course it bothers you, it would bother anyone. I think you should be direct and honest with him and tell him that you know this woman has been messaging him. Tell him whatever you've told us, that it makes you uncomfortable and you don't like the ... (read in full...)

Why in the world can't I move on?! ?

Q.   I have been through a couple of serious breakups in my life but for some reason the one that happened recently has seemingly destroyed me. I dated someone for a very short period of time albeit knowing him for over 12 years. We were only together...

A.   3 January 2017: You can't move on because you're not allowing yourself to move on. You don't want to accept the fact that someone who seemingly loved you so much, now by his own admission doesn't care about you at all. That as you said, has hit you hard, and ... (read in full...)

My husband made 160 phone calls in one month to his female coworker! Advice?

Q.   Geez - where to begin? Suffice it to say that about a year ago I began a downward spiral into depression. (The triggering event was horrific, but unrelated to my marriage). Anyway, I am definitely not myself, anymore, nor do I adequately fulfill the ...

A.   2 January 2017: I'm stunned at people's attitude towards marriage these days! One thing goes wrong and rather than try and work towards it, they look at the easiest way out... Fulfilling their desires by having affairs. Your husband took vows with you. For better ... (read in full...)

Is it possible I haven't found anyone who could excite me and hence I've now lost interest?

Q.   hi there!! A happy new year to everyone I want to know if anyone has gone through the phase I am going though right now. So it has been over a year I broke up from a bad relationship that was long term. Since my focus is on my career and other p...

A.   1 January 2017: Relax! Nothing's going wrong, it's just that you haven't come across anyone who's challenged you intellectually and who you've found sexually attractive in a long time and you're beginning to think that you're losing the plot. What you're f... (read in full...)

Is there still a chance for us ? Maybe it has been way long over and I just didn't want to accept it? What can I say?

Q.   I've only known my boyfriend for eight months and we've been dating for sixth months but it has been an on and off relationship. The first few weeks or month was everything I ever wanted to be in a relationship where my boyfriend would take me ...

A.   1 January 2017: I honestly cannot believe that in today's day and age, an educated woman is asking this question! Is your self esteem really this low? How can you not see the blatant obviousness of the situation? OP this man will kill you one day if you don't get ... (read in full...)

My jobless, lazy boyfriend is using me for money. He thinks what's mine is also his

Q.   Okay so my boyfriend and I have been together for over a year, he has been living with me and my family for about 8 months, for the past 6 months he has been unemployed and living off of me completely. Recently I was fortunate enough to come into a ...

A.   1 January 2017: You ARE getting used and you know it and you're still allowing it. Why did you buy his gifts? Ask yourself, what's the purpose of this relationship? Do you see yourself marrying this guy eventually? Can he take care of you? Your kids? Pay the ... (read in full...)

Can you be pregnant with negative test results?

Q.   I had sex with a guy one night in September. I dont really remember what happened but i know we had sex. We used a condom but i am unsure if he secretly slipped it off or of the condom may have failed. It isvDecember now and my stomach looks ...

A.   30 December 2016: You're most likely not pregnant but go to the doctor and get yourself checked. By the way, you can't "look" pregnant this soon... (read in full...)

Is he not interested or just bad at texting?

Q.   Recently I've been talking to a guy, we live a long distance from each other so our main form of communication is texting. At first we texted frequently and the conversation flowed. However after a few weeks he kept taking longer and longer to ...

A.   30 December 2016: Not interested. Don't waste any more time with this guy. He's not worth the stress.... (read in full...)

Is it normal for a 69 year old man to have only one topic he wants to talk about, namely his 30 year old divorced daughter. Is it worth continuing this relationship?

Q.   I am 54 years old and met a really nice man who is 15 years my senior. He is divorced and has two daughters one aged 34 and the other in her twenties. On our first date he made a toast to his eldest daughters success in getting a promotion. (i...

A.   29 December 2016: He's a doting father. The daughter has been a very important part of his life who had filled the void left by his wife. Not in a creepy way but in a nice way. He's proud of her, he thinks she's leading the kind of life that is an example to others ... (read in full...)

I told him that I liked him but he just said that let's go with flow. Am I just a friend to him?

Q.   I told one of my guy friend that I liked him but he just said that let's go with flow. From that day we started texting a lot. It's been 9 months.. I don't know where exactly we stand.. We talk and meet up sometimes but we haven't talk on this top...

A.   28 December 2016: This isn't going anywhere and he's not into you. Don't waste any more time on this guy. If he liked you then he would have taken an instant to tell you so and would have done just about anything to be with you. ... (read in full...)

Am I freaking out for no reason? He hasn't texted in 3 days!

Q.   Hello, I'm a 22 year old single mother. I haven't dated much and it's been 2 years since my last serious relationship. I recently met a guy at the mall a few weeks ago. Well we have been texting the past couple weeks and then this past Wednesday w...

A.   28 December 2016: Please just leave it. He's just a kid, barely out of his teens and no offence but you don't seem very good at making decisions. You're a very young mother living with your own mother; you should be looking at raising your daughter as well as you can ... (read in full...)

Why do some men say things to their partner the man thinks may sound supportive, and yet concurrently they collect pictures of women and porn?

Q.   I know this might seem a dumb question but it's bothered me in a lot of relationships I've been in as I've noticed most guys seem to do it and think it's no big deal to lie about it . Why do some men say things to their partner like 'you're the only...

A.   25 December 2016: This could be a huge essay on why people lie but let's keep it simple. People lie (in relationships): because they can, because it's the easy way out, because it gets them out of trouble, because it helps them get laid, because it helps to p... (read in full...)

I just found his sex doll, I’m upset! What do I do?

Q.   I just found my boyfriend of 4 yrs silicone sex doll. I haven't had a chance to talk yo him about it bc his mom has been in the hospital but is now coming home. I can't hold it in much longer. I'm upset what do I do?...

A.   24 December 2016: Why are you upset? It's not like he's having an affair or has another girlfriend! It's a sex toy... Like a vibrator for women! How long have you been with the guy? Maybe he used it before he met you... (read in full...)

Does sending me picture of her stomach tattoo with the bottom of her breasts just visible mean she’s flirting with me?

Q.   So I have a friend and we live far apart but we text a lot. I don't know her super well yet but I am getting to know her, I enjoy her company on the phone and she is kind of cute. We often send each other photos of our day to day life. We got onto ...

A.   23 December 2016: Nope, not normal. She's flirting and not in a subtle way. Women don't really go around showing pics of their stomach and underboobs unless they're desperate for attention. And she was "about to have a bath" so she decided to show it? Why mention ... (read in full...)

How could she have a three year sexual affair with this guy, and still have sex with me??

Q.   I recently discovered that my wife has been having a sexual affair with a single friend of ours for the past three years, usually when I was at work.... he is single and has had girlfriends in this three year period..She knew this because he came ...

A.   22 December 2016: Your wife's behavior reflects exactly what cheaters in a marriage do. They don't intend leaving their spouse so they continue doing what's expected of them in their marital relationship while also having a good time outside. This is why she was ... (read in full...)

How can I prevent my Aunty from showing me up in front of my boyfriend on Christmas Day? Title

Q.   I've been with my partner for 6 years, and this will be the first time we are spending Christmas with my family. Though my boyfriend has met the rest of my family, this will be the first time he's meeting my aunty. She's actually a really nice pe...

A.   21 December 2016: When I read your post and tried putting myself in your situation, my first instinct was that of anger. But then I thought, why not take a different approach? Why not just laugh at the pics yourself if she does show them and make fun of the ... (read in full...)

I love her but don't know to what extent I love her

Q.   I am facing a dilemma. Whether to marry, or to leave my girlfriend. I am inexperienced, and I need your opinion on what our relationship looks like to you, and what you think I should do. I also would like to hear what you think is important in a ...

A.   20 December 2016: I think Danielepew nailed it. People who are truly in love don't stop and think if they want to marry that person; they just do. My husband knew that he wanted to marry me within a week of meeting me and he tells me that he never had a doubt. T... (read in full...)

Crippling retroactive jealousy - does it get better?

Q.   My battle with retroactive jealousy: - It's been almost 2.5 years. Improvements: - It is getting better. I can function normally in last one year. - Hearth shattering instant images no longer pops up. - It is getting less visual. - I kinda g...

A.   17 December 2016: Does it get better? Honestly, no. I don't think that in your case it will get better because you have allowed RJ to have too strong a grip on you and are suffering severely as a result of it. You're giving yourself too much importance by thinking... (read in full...)

LDR girlfriend had an abortion then said I wasnt there for her when she needed me. She now won't talk to me

Q.   She had a miscarriage .She was bleeding for 20 days,both of us are not ready for a baby.Its a long distance relationship..so she went to the doctor alone..There was big tissue in her uterus..Doctor gave her some abortion pills..after severe pain for ...

A.   14 December 2016: I wish there was a way we here could make this guy pay like hell. This is either a troll or a complete moron who can't even string a sentence correctly and doesn't understand our even try to understand any logic. Dude no one is misunder... (read in full...)

LDR girlfriend had an abortion then said I wasnt there for her when she needed me. She now won't talk to me

Q.   She had a miscarriage .She was bleeding for 20 days,both of us are not ready for a baby.Its a long distance relationship..so she went to the doctor alone..There was big tissue in her uterus..Doctor gave her some abortion pills..after severe pain for ...

A.   12 December 2016: Are you for real? You think she's playing mind games with you after you royally fucked up her life? Do you really not see what you put her through? And do you also realize that if she takes a drastic step in a moment of desperation them you would be ... (read in full...)

How can a single mom find a boyfriend?

Q.   Im pretty active, I go to school and work 24 hours a week. I have a beautiful 16 month old son. The dad and me are still ok but he lives 4 hours away. It seems like the only guys I can attract now are guys who already have kids, have been in trouble ...

A.   12 December 2016: Just about everything that you've written seems to be problematic. You have a 16 month old son and you're looking at dating when right now your priority should be the child. Where would you even get the time for dating? You then go on to sa... (read in full...)

Is he a once in a lifetime find??

Q.   Okay so I need some opinions. I was in an extremely verbally and emotionally abusive relationship ( he was the abuser) with my ex husband of almost 7 years. I finally realized what was happening and that he could not change so in July we made the...

A.   9 December 2016: He sounds perfect but I'll still say, give time for the relationship to mature. Meanwhile, as hard as it might be, try not to let your past overshadow your future. Don't make J pay for the fact that you had a bad marriage and are still insecure. If ... (read in full...)

How can I keep safe on New Year's Eve when I will be alone?

Q.   I am going to the heart of my city to see theater show on NYE, am catching a bus due to traffic.. is this safe as a single woman alone.? I am alone caching a bus home after the show at 10.30-11pm, before midnights events/fireworks etc.. there will...

A.   9 December 2016: I wouldn't go... Because it's not worth the risks that it entails. You're hoping that the bus "maybe" full. What if it isn't? It's perfectly fine to be alone and New Year's Eve is just another day; I dont even see what all the hype about it is. ... (read in full...)

Is this how relationships are meant to be now

Q.   Wanted to message in as its been so long since I have dated or looked into starting a new relationship that im just so unsure if things im not feeling so happy about, could be in fact be me with my ways and that I will have to look at changing. I...

A.   7 December 2016: He definitely seems keen on sex and is pushing for it while you are very rigid about boundaries and rightly so. It's way too early to be sleeping over and sleeping together. If he genuinely likes you then he'll respect your boundaries and will... (read in full...)

How do I take back a stupid lie I told to my boyfriend?

Q.   Hi, Let me start with saying I have been extremely stupid. I started dating my current boyfriend 1.5 years back, and wanted very badly to impress him. Unfortunately I had told him sometime back (before we started dating) that I had 2 boyfrien...

A.   7 December 2016: "Oh, what a tangled web we weave. When we first practice to deceive!" What on earth were you thinking when you made up this ridiculous story OP? Please tell him the truth immediately and hope against hope that he believes you. He obviousl... (read in full...)

Exactly what is it he is asking, when he asks, "what do you want?"

Q.   I really really really like this guy. We've been seeing each other and talking and everything is wonderful. He asked me what I want a few times. In fact he said he wants me to think of what is it I want in the next few weeks..And I have no idea what ...

A.   5 December 2016: Maybe he's asking you if you want sex?... (read in full...)

How do I get over this rough patch?

Q.   I feel so down today. I had no one to share it with so I came on here. I guess it's just a couple of things that have got to me. I have been working full time for a year, and this December within 3 days my whole months salary has gone leaving me ...

A.   4 December 2016: While it's understandable to help your mom out, it's certainly not acceptable to keep sending money to your girlfriend. You say she's an amazing person and she doesn't ask you for money unless it's Christmas. My point is though, why should s... (read in full...)

My girlfriend has become very self centred

Q.   I'm 25 years old and I work in ems/fire. I've been having troubles with my girlfriend recently. I feel like she is becoming very controlling due to the fact she doesn't even live with me but yet gets mad when I have friends over or my dad and brot...

A.   4 December 2016: She's completely taken you for granted and thinks that she can rule over you whichever way she wants because you're putting up with her nonsense without any protests. While your gesture to make her feel good with the rose petals and the candles ... (read in full...)

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