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Too often we underestimate the power of a touch, a smile, a kind word, a listening ear, an honest compliment, or the smallest act of caring, all of which have the potential to turn a life around.

Latest articles:

Just Two

This question has 3 answers by readers of DearCupid.ORG.
Newest answer was posted

31 March 2011: I recently read something nice that I would like to share.... JUST TWO. Donate blood twice a year. Donate your eyes after death. Thank God twice a day. Write two letters a week. Visit two ailing people a month. Say two words of gratitude-"...

A little humility goes a long way

This question has 8 answers by readers of DearCupid.ORG.
Newest answer was posted

27 March 2011: I’ve been a moderator here on DC for a while and it’s a great forum. It really irritates me though when the OP shows no regard for the aunts who’ve taken time to answer questions. We moderators don’t know you, yet we spend time poring over ever...

1234567891011Next > [55 pages, 2158 answers]

My ex girlfriend wants to be reimbursed for gifts she gave me.

Q.   I have recently broke up with my girlfriend after nine months together, a couple of weeks before we separated she bought me a present but now we're not together she's asking me to give her back the money she spent on that present, I don't think ...

A.   8 November 2018: Give it back. Why do you even want to keep anything from her anymore?... (read in full...)

We are on a break but working on our relationship ... he doesn't understand how his actions affected me.

Q.   7 months ago, my ex and I broke up, mutually. Our relationship was long-term. A few days after our breakup I accidentally read a conversation in his facebook account between him and a female friend. The conversation was very intimate, and almost ...

A.   7 November 2018: Wait I don't understand a lot of things here. How did you "accidentally" read a conversation on Facebook? It means you were snooping. And why does he have to reassure you of anything that he's doing once you have broken up? If you are broken u... (read in full...)

We have fun and the sex is amazing but then why doesn't he fall for me?

Q.   Hey all. I feel like a spoilt brat here, like Verruca Salt when she can't get what she wants. I've completely fallen for a co worker. He works in another office and lives 80 miles away. He lives alone (divorced with a son) as I live with parents ...

A.   6 November 2018: It's not a game of chance OP. You can't keep having sex with him hoping that he'll fall for you! If he had to then he would have, by now. You're coming to his door almost wrapped in a ribbon like a gift that he just needs to open while all he need... (read in full...)

He can't say I love you to me but we keep breaking up and getting back together. I don't know what to do

Q.   Okay, this is going to be long and I apologize in advance - I’ll try to summarize as much as possible. Two years ago (August 2016) I started my masters program in a big city. I was on dating apps for fun, mostly, not looking for anything serious...

A.   5 November 2018: Your friends are exhausted, you're exhausted and so am I, a third-party, from just listening about this whiny ex of yours! To love someone is the simplest thing in the world and it doesn't have to be so complex, so complicated, so painful,... (read in full...)

Where do you draw the line on honesty, versus someone indirectly putting another person down?

Q.   Dear Cupid I would really value your opinion now. Where do you draw the line on honesty, versus someone indirectly putting another person down? At what point do you realize that someone is being genuinely helpful, or is just putting you ...

A.   4 November 2018: It's very clear after reading your follow-up...she's jealous of you. She can't bear your accomplishments and reminds you of your flaws because she wants you to feel bad. That's her way of pulling you down. Why are you still tolerating h... (read in full...)

Where do you draw the line on honesty, versus someone indirectly putting another person down?

Q.   Dear Cupid I would really value your opinion now. Where do you draw the line on honesty, versus someone indirectly putting another person down? At what point do you realize that someone is being genuinely helpful, or is just putting you ...

A.   2 November 2018: I do not like people who put others down in the name of honesty and I hate it when people offer unwarranted advice. I believe that unless categorically asked, there should be no "well meaning" words of wisdom on offer to anyone. I have an aunt ... (read in full...)

Do I warn others hes a serious fantasist

Q.   So just over a year ago i met a man on a dating site and we decided to make a go of it. Everything was great for the first couple of month then he sectioned himself. He had told me prior to meeting his mental health issues. So we kind of had a break ...

A.   2 November 2018: I don't think many women would be as foolish on purpose as you were. I would be more worried about yourself, for falling for someone like him for as long as you did, after everything that he told you. I think you're the one that needs help here.... (read in full...)

My married lover doesn't want me to go on trips by myself. Why doesn't he trust me?

Q.   My married lover travels with his wife up to 3-5 times a year. The longest he is away is a month at a time. It's very difficult for me, even though I've chosen to place myself in this role. I feel resentful and left behind. They are natural ...

A.   31 October 2018: Trust, respect, faith are all lost on him. Why? Because he's a lowlife who's cheating on his wife with you and cheating on you with God knows who. He knows his own flaws far too well and thinks that if he's not be trusted then others are not as w... (read in full...)

We met online I'm 18 he's 34. Is it wrong that I want to be with him?

Q.   I just want opinions. I have known a man for over 3 months now. We met online, we Skype regularly, he's amazing. We talk everyday. He lives 2 hours away from me.The only thing is he is 34 and I am 18. I want to be with him so bad. Is this wro...

A.   27 October 2018: Please stop immediately! You know next to nothing about a man who's sitting behind a computer and for all you know, painting a rosy picture to trap you. If you were my daughter, to say that I would be horrified out of my wits is an understatement. ... (read in full...)

I can't give either of them up but I know I need to in the long term.

Q.   I'm in a relationship with a great man. We have our ups and downs as do any couple but he is undoubtably who I want to be with and we are on the whole very happy. However. I have been having a fling/relationship - call or what you will, with someo...

A.   27 October 2018: The fling guy is an escape for you, a parallel universe. You're intensely attracted to him because what you have with him isn't real. Its almost a fantasy that you've no doubt romanticized no end. You dont live with him, never have, never will. You ... (read in full...)

I went out of my way to make my friend feel special on his birthday but he didn't do anything for me on mine

Q.   It’s really bugging me that I spent my birthday alone. When my best friend has his birthday, I planned dinner, made sure all his friends were there. I personally took them, paid for him etc. We had a great time. Recently it was my bir...

A.   21 October 2018: I think the problem with our generation is that we place our happiness in other people's hands. We don't look at making ourselves happy, we don't look at comforting ourselves, at being our own best friend; we rely on others to do that. You w... (read in full...)

Should I fly 4,000 miles to go see my ex? Would it be cheating?

Q.   So... we’ve broken up for 5 years after an incident and subsequently I moved home to my home country. Contact was lost eventually as we were sick of crying over the phone. Recently, I thought I saw him whilst on vacation and sent him a text. He...

A.   20 October 2018: If you have to ask, then yes. What does your partner have to say about this, by the way? ... (read in full...)

How do I move forward and stop letting his coworker get to me?

Q.   So my husband has a female coworker and their work relationship has made me uncomfortable. More so because of the actions of my husband. He has lied to me numerous times and all lies have been associated with her. While this was happening, I was ...

A.   20 October 2018: Your husband is not as innocent as he's making himself out to be. He's lied to you, he hasn't stood by you during your post-partum depression, he's crossed the line with his co-worker and he's definitely not to be trusted. Not just that, he's pushed ... (read in full...)

I kissed other men while we were broken up, now back together did I cheat on him?

Q.   My boyfriend and I had split up for week, his decision and I was gutted but said I would respect his decision. I went out with a friend for a night out and i kissed two men. I love my boyfriend and I was upset with it all. We have now got back tog...

A.   18 October 2018: Ross and Rachel have re-defined "we were in a break" and we've all learnt that no good ever comes out of it. Splitting for a week is not just extremely childish and immature, it also goes to show how ill equipped he is to deal with problems... (read in full...)

He asked me out as a joke but I said yes ... how do I face my friends?

Q.   My crush asked me out as a joke and I said yes. I was sick the day after and I wasn’t at school. My friends texted me about it. Apparently he had told most of my friends. Now I have to go back to school. I don’t really like him a lot. I just ...

A.   18 October 2018: Two can play at this game. If he said that he was joking, your say the same thing. Laugh it off when people ask you about him and say, "did you guys really think I was serious? How silly! Did you really think I would say yes to him and mean it?... (read in full...)

I said yes when he proposed but I worry it wasnt the right answer.

Q.   Hi, I've been with my boyfriend for 12 years and live with him. I've had some problems with my boyfriend for a while, maybe a year. He stopped being romantic and didn't go on dates or ever go out to spend time at the weekend with me. He woul...

A.   18 October 2018: 1.) He changed his ways... And I bet it's only for a brief while .. when you threatened to leave him and start dating other men. He knows his limitations, he knows that you're too good for him and he probably himself wonders why you've been putting ... (read in full...)

How do I get over my co-worker? I have made sacrifices she wouldnt make and I know she doesn't care about me

Q.   I apologise in advance for rambling but I wasn’t sure how to explain things. It’s been a long time since I last felt the need to ask for advice online but I’m desperate. I can’t talk to any of my friends because I’d be breaching confidentiality ...

A.   16 October 2018: You're letting your feelings cloud over your judgement. Let's get some things in order here. This woman is straight, doesn't like you very much and you stand absolutely no chance with her. This in itself should be enough of a deterrent. You're ... (read in full...)

I'm willing to leave my husband but my married lover isn't saying anything about leaving his wife

Q.   Iv been having an affair for a couple of years now and decided to end my marriage. I'm living with a friend but my married lover is still staying put. I said it was my problem about leaving my husband but he said he was still worried for me. He ...

A.   15 October 2018: Men don’t cheat with the intention of leaving their wives. For them it's simply sex or an arrangement where two consenting adults are having an amazing time, without attachment or commitment. In his mind, he has justified his actions as no big deal ... (read in full...)

Engagement called off due to past relationship how do I fix things?

Q.   I was engaged to a wonderful guy.He is a virgin and have very high Morales and values.However, i lied to him about my past relationship and virginity. Engagement called off due to videos and pictures of sexual activity and intimate ones,ta...

A.   14 October 2018: I'm thinking more along the lines of what action you can take against the creepy ex. He's crossed a line, he's basically blackmailed you and has circulated private sexual vide of yours. There has to be some legal provision that deals with this jerk. ... (read in full...)

I know he's had sex with others before being in a relationship with me but it bothers me that he lied about his "first" sexual experiments

Q.   I have been in a happy relationship with my boyfriend for 8 months. we are very open about our past relationships and both of us accepted everything about it and continued. so trust and respect was the major factor in our relation. we have a very ...

A.   9 October 2018: Maybe you are not fine with the fact that he's slept with other women. You think you are not you're not. Perhaps it was different when you just started dating and sleeping together but now that you're getting closer, you're starting to resent him ... (read in full...)

My wife's adult children are bums whose lifestyles I pay for.

Q.   Hi all, I have a problem. First off, I've been married for over 21 years. We largely get along -- mostly because I don't complain about much. During that time, I have raised my wife's 2 children from her previous marriage. They are cur...

A.   6 October 2018: Your marriage has been a marriage of convenience for your wife because (a) you were never a priority; you were a god-sent option for her to not live life as a single mother and (b) while you were providing for everything and married to your wife, ... (read in full...)

My wife's adult children are bums whose lifestyles I pay for.

Q.   Hi all, I have a problem. First off, I've been married for over 21 years. We largely get along -- mostly because I don't complain about much. During that time, I have raised my wife's 2 children from her previous marriage. They are cur...

A.   6 October 2018: I don't get it... You've been in these kids lives as long as they can remember and yet you blame your wife for what they've become? I'm sorry but this is just not possible. You're leaving out information conveniently. You also say that all this ... (read in full...)

I'm not comfortable seeing him if he is going to date other people.

Q.   I have been dating/talking to this guy for only 3 weeks. We have been in on a few dates and I have stayed at his house also , things seemed to be going well. So I found out he took another girl out on a date but he doesn’t know that I know , and I ...

A.   6 October 2018: Just tell him that. Exactly what you've told us... That you're not comfortable with him dating others simultaneously and if he's not treating your dating/the getting-to-know-each-other period as exclusive, then you'd rather not see him any longer. ... (read in full...)

Struggling to get over ex and finding it hard to look at dating again!

Q.   Hi all, I guess this is a slightly multi-layered problem. Firstly I am single as of close to year ago. I mention this as I feel it potentially explains certain things as of yet mentioned. It was a strange breakup that never really had clos...

A.   5 October 2018: Personally I don't understand what people mean when they say closure. I don't believe there is anything a person who has dumped his/her partner can say to make things better. And somewhere down the line you knew that things weren't exactly going to ... (read in full...)

Cheated on my boyfriend 2 weeks before getting pregnant help!!!

Q.   I am 24 years old and found out I was pregnant about 3 weeks ago. I have been with my boyfriend for 5 years and thought things were fizzled out, I looked for company else where. I have never cheated on him before and can’t believe I did it this ...

A.   25 September 2018: What is most surprising is that everyone's going on about you and your boyfriend and no one's saying anything about the little person who's taking life within you! For heaven's sake spare a thought for the baby!! This is not the best way to bring an ... (read in full...)

My wife wants to use a sperm donor to ensure that our third child isn't autistic but I’m not sure how I feel about this.

Q.   My wife (34f) and I (36m) have been married for just over six years and in many ways have an ideal marriage and are very much still in love. Despite two kids, we still have sex 2 - 3 times per week. We still find time for getaways nearby beaches, ...

A.   19 September 2018: If both you and your wife are not on the sand page regarding this then there is no way you should go ahead with it. Because if you look at it the way it is without any sugar-coating, it will just be your wife's baby. Not yours. You will basically be ... (read in full...)

My fiance is a virgin but I've slept with 6 people and had an abortion. Do I need to tell him all this?

Q.   Hi, I am engaged to a wonderful guy from the last 5 months, we are going to get married this December 2018,I came to know by investigation and inspection and his views and thoughts and actions, that he is a virgin and he is against premarital sex ...

A.   19 September 2018: Don't tell him anything. You're starting a new life and while you've done nothing to be ashamed of, your fiance might not see it like that. The guys you've been involved with are probably living life unscathed and there's no reason why you should ... (read in full...)

She owes me money but is adamant she transferred the money!

Q.   Hello This is not so much a dating question or anything, but I have used this website before for advice and found it helpful. A girl I have been on and off chatting to asked me if she could borrow £1000 to repair her damaged car. I agreed...

A.   17 September 2018: She's obviously lying and you've been fleeced. Do you know where she stays? You need to somehow contact her and ensure that you prove to her that you haven't received the money. And as aunt honeypie says, contact a lawyer. The amount is too big ... (read in full...)

DId I ruin a good thing by commenting on his social media and being petty?

Q.   Hey guys, I'm in a dilemma with a guy. So the beginning of August, I start talking to this college athlete that goes to the neighboring school. Everything is great, affection, attention, dates, sex and spending time. Until about a week ago, he pos...

A.   11 September 2018: I personally think that he's being a tad overdramatic...I mean this is really no great reason to break something off just like that. But then it goes to show you what you mean to him and I think whatever happened was for the best because at least ... (read in full...)

My boyfriend wants me to help support him as he tries to strengthen his knee!

Q.   Hello I would like your opinion on this. My boyfriend and I are in a long distance relationship. We live in the USA, he lives in the East Coast, while I live in the West Coast. We've been together for about three years. My boyfriend injured himself ...

A.   5 September 2018: Don't give him a single penny. His story is as dodgy as his knee and there is no way your should fall for his brazen shamelessness.... (read in full...)

Does this indicate that there is more than a friendship or just nothing to worry about?

Q.   Ok so my boyfriend has a female friend which happens to be his accountant but he told me they are also friends,they around the same age group, he is older than me, when my bf did his housewarming get together he invited me and my family plus his ...

A.   5 September 2018: Well I wouldn't worry. While she's obviously interested in him... Doesn't take a rocket scientist to figure that out... He's not. And that's what is important here. Look you can't stop someone from falling for you or looking at you a certain ... (read in full...)

Is it unreasonable that I don't want to know about his personal masterbation habits?

Q.   I hope this question is not too vulgar. It's actually quite personal and embarrassing but I'm not sure how to handle my situation most effectively without some advice. I'm sorry for the length. It's a two part question i guess. A few weeks ag...

A.   3 September 2018: If porn is a touchy subject for you and your ex has given your grief over it then why on earth did you want to bring it into your bedroom with the new guy? OP I don't know if you realise it or not but you're trying to self-sabotage your relation... (read in full...)

After one date his messages have become short and infrequent. Should I give up?

Q.   I connected with a guy on a dating app and we hit it off. We seemed to be on the same wavelength, there seemed to be a lot of chemistry, a real attraction. We continuously messaged each other. We arranged to meet and counted down the days. The ...

A.   1 September 2018: I'm jumping in late but I'll add my two cents. I've said it many times before here and I'll say it again...if a man likes you and wants to be with you then nothing and I mean nothing can stop him. Do you remember that episode of Sex and the City ... (read in full...)

Turnng 30 and getting itchy feet about passionless relationship

Q.   Hi, I don't know what to do or how to feel. I have lived at home with my parents until not long ago. I was always a good kid and studied hard and didn't go out partying. I've bought a house and moved in with my partner of 10 years. I have bee...

A.   24 August 2018: You know what they say... Why buy the cow when you're getting the milk free? You've bought a house with him and living together so basically you're his wife without it being legal. You're cooking, cleaning, sharing a bed, finances, responsi... (read in full...)

I’m ready to buy my first home but I’m not sure about buying it with my boyfriend!

Q.   I'm 24 and I'm ready to buy my first home. I have been saving for years and years and finally have enough for a small deposit. I currently live at home with my mum and I've never lived elsewhere. Living at home and just paying rent and the food shop ...

A.   14 August 2018: The guy who gives you butterflies also calls you names not worth mentioning and no, no amount of pressure from home or work gives anyone a right to be nasty with anyone. You are always responsible for how you act, no matter how you feel. Remember ... (read in full...)

My husband slapped me on the face because he didn't like what I was wearing and I wouldn't change

Q.   3 years ago, i thought i met the love of my life. I've been in the US for 4 years, since I've been working there i met this man, we got into a relationship and after 1 year, he proposed to me. I was madly in love with him. Since we got married, he ...

A.   6 August 2018: You're not convinced by what your parents are telling you and you're asking strangers on the internet for permission to divorce this guy? Yes please, in that case! He hit you... He could very well keep you locked up next to avoid men lookin... (read in full...)

I rejected my ideal guy years ago, and now he's with someone else and it's driving me crazy. Help!

Q.   Hey, I'm writing this partly to get it off my chest and partly because I need to change something about this situation, even if it's just my way of thinking about it. 5 years ago I was single, much more stupid than I am now, and met a brillia...

A.   30 July 2018: Yes, it's a terrible idea. It's not up to you to decide how Ben's relationship is and if it's platonic or romantic. You're being very judgmental of him and his girlfriend and just because you want what you can't have gives you no et to spoil so... (read in full...)

We moved in way too quickly and now finances are breaking us apart

Q.   Hey all.. Before I start, please don’t include judgement saying I shouldn’t be living with him yet, it’s too soon to have introduced him to my daughter, etc. So, my boyfriend and I have been dating 6 months. We moved in together rather quickly ...

A.   27 July 2018: When you ask for advice on a public forum, don't start off by dictating what not to tell you. Why don't you want to be told that you moved in too quickly? Because it's the truth and you already know it and just want it to slide by? Well you know... (read in full...)

My friend never has time for me anymore since she started dating. Do I walk away?

Q.   Not sure if anyone on here can help but I wanted some advice about a friendship. One of my best friends has recently become very distant and so reluctant to see me. I've been trying to arrange to see her one weekend for several months but I jus...

A.   26 July 2018: The friction here is because you don't think that your friendship should change because of her relationship with a guy while your friend feels that you don't understand that she's busy now that she has a man in her life who takes most of her time. ... (read in full...)

In love with someone else whilst in a relationship with someone I am not in love with

Q.   I've been in a relationship with my boyfriend for 10 months now. We get on really well as companions and friends, we really care about eachother and are affectionate. I know he loves me and i feel safe with him. The longstanding issue has become ...

A.   25 July 2018: I think first things first, you need to break up with your boyfriend in the nicest way possible because it's not right to treat him as a safety net. You know that's the right thing to do. Your heart says so, your instinct says so, and that is ... (read in full...)

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