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Too often we underestimate the power of a touch, a smile, a kind word, a listening ear, an honest compliment, or the smallest act of caring, all of which have the potential to turn a life around.

Latest articles:

Just Two

This question has 3 answers by readers of DearCupid.ORG.
Newest answer was posted

31 March 2011: I recently read something nice that I would like to share.... JUST TWO. Donate blood twice a year. Donate your eyes after death. Thank God twice a day. Write two letters a week. Visit two ailing people a month. Say two words of gratitude-"...

A little humility goes a long way

This question has 8 answers by readers of DearCupid.ORG.
Newest answer was posted

27 March 2011: I’ve been a moderator here on DC for a while and it’s a great forum. It really irritates me though when the OP shows no regard for the aunts who’ve taken time to answer questions. We moderators don’t know you, yet we spend time poring over ever...

1234567891011Next > [50 pages, 1962 answers]

How do I lay my cards on the table? He wants to go into the Navy but I think he's missing a good thing in us!

Q.   Hi. I'm sorry for the long email - but I feel like I need to get loads of details into this to give afull picture. Here's my story: I'm a 25-year-old woman who struggles to meet guys that I'm attracted to and have a really great connection with....

A.   19 October 2017: I'm going to try and answer this as best as possible without being harsh. OP he couldn't be more clear but he doesn't want you in his life but you are not ready to leave him and in the process coming across as a really desperate and clingy. ... (read in full...)

I think he likes another girl but I don't know how to broach the topic

Q.   My boyfriend and I have been dating for a few months but it's not exactly official, his family don't know and only a couple of our close friends know, it's like a need to know basis. Recently he went on holiday back to his home town with a mutu...

A.   18 October 2017: Sweetie if you feel that something is wrong then it probably is. And the sooner you sort this out the better it is...although I honestly don't know how on earth he's going to convince you. Let's say you ask him what's going on and he swears that ... (read in full...)

Is it a good sign that he told her?

Q.   Hi aunts and uncles. I wanted to know what your opinion was on this. My new boyfriend of a month has a huge circle of friends and he's pretty well loved by people as the "nice" guy/good guy. Yesterday he told me he spoke to this girl and told her...

A.   16 October 2017: The message on its own is ok, it's a good sign. However, and I'm maybe digging too deep, but if this girl did like him in a romantic way then can she really be just friends with him now? And why would she help with his decorating? What's the need? ... (read in full...)

My friend was in town and didn't tell me

Q.   A few months after a bad breakup, I reached out to my high school prom date who I'd always had a crush on. I suspected it may be mutual. We began talking and flirting regularly. He visited me once and I visited him once, as we live several hou...

A.   15 October 2017: You feel ridiculous because you put yourself out there hoping for a rebound relationship with someone you thought had a crush on you and now you feel rejected. I know what hurts now is the rejection. The fact that he didn't get back to you when... (read in full...)

I have been helplessley in love with someone for too long, what do I do?

Q.   I am in love with someone. I have known him for years now. When I fell in love with im, it was slow, and so pure. He was my first love. I love him with all of my heart. Around the time I fell for him he had a girlfriend. And that hurt my heart, b...

A.   9 October 2017: Sweetie you sound really jumbled up and confused and I feel for you because it's clear you're deeply infatuated with this young man. You say you're both in love but then if that's the case, why aren't you together? You then say that you've changed ... (read in full...)

He found the girl he dumped me for was too costly and wants me to take him back.

Q.   So, this guy and I were dating for almost two years and he proposed to me in May. A few weeks later he tells me hes going on vacation with his old crush/ friend since high school there both 28. But they have been friends forever. So, he breaks off ...

A.   9 October 2017: Not only is he an ass, he's a stalker and that's what's scary. Listen stop being polite and nice to him and explain to him once and for all when you are IN A PUBLIC PLACE (cannot stress this enough) that you have nothing more to do with him and ... (read in full...)

My ex bf new gf texting me how good their relationship is

Q.   I've been in a relationship for almost 2 years now. We've had our ups and downs but we pulled through. We also had lots of arguments. On our last argument we had I went to work, came home and he packed his things and left. My ex bf now, left a ...

A.   8 October 2017: You should celebrate the fact that you're FREE from this asshole and you actually got saved from a potential disaster. Imagine if this had happened 5 years and one child later! When they tell you how happy they are, beam at them and wish them all ... (read in full...)

I think it's degrading to give oral if it's not reciprocated and he thinks I owe it to him because I gave it to other lovers!

Q.   An Oral Sex Dilemma My boyfriend and I have been discussing about oral sex for a few weeks now. We have very different opinions and want the opinion of outside individuals. I think that it is degrading to give oral when if it is not reciproca...

A.   4 October 2017: OP you are both going about it the wrong way. Why have you been discussing your past with him and the number of men that you have performed oral sex on? How is it any of his business and why should he know what you have done in the past? I am ... (read in full...)

How to come to terms with my academic failure?

Q.   So basically, I've spent the past two years working towards my masters degree as well as working full time. Up until this summer I've been doing really well (average grade 75, on track for a distinction), only to choke in my last few months and ...

A.   4 October 2017: I would like to share my experience with you OP. I have a PhD in Sociology and there was a time I was very keen on a prestigious fellowship for the Masters level and I was really sure that I would get it. I didn't. My world came crashing do... (read in full...)

My boyfriend keeps asking to meet my former best friend

Q.   My boyfriend and I have been dating for 16 months. We met through a social group in which we both joined around the same time, and that group is my main circle of friends. I do not keep in touch regularly with anyone else. I have friends whom I call ...

A.   3 October 2017: I agree, it's absolutely a nuisance. He's behaving like a petulant child throwing a tantrum. Well since he's being a baby, you have to deal with him the way you would with one. Tell him firmly that you are done with this discussion and that you see ... (read in full...)

I deserve better than to be ghosted by someone that I thought cared about me

Q.   We were close friends (according to him) but our feelings for each other complicated things. He shied away from having a relationship. He told me he was scared to be a rebound, because his last relationship was a rebound and ended miserably. I was ...

A.   30 September 2017: He doesn't want anything to do with you and I think you should retain your self respect and not have anything to do with him either. You keep reaching out and he keeps dismissing you and each time that he brushes you aside, you feel worse than ... (read in full...)

My boyfriend and I argue constantly but I love him.

Q.   My boyfriend and I have been together 2 and a half years. Things were great in the beginning but more recently we seem to argue about everything. Things are lovely when we're getting on but we seem to argue most days and he goes silent and will ...

A.   29 September 2017: I sort of understand where you're coming from because my cousin's husband is mad over football as well... So much so that I don't even think he has a very stable job and she supports him financially but anyway. My point is that, this can get very ... (read in full...)

My boyfriend has a new friend & he seems to care more about their relationship than ours.

Q.   I've been in a relationship for five years, and cheating has never been something I was concerned about. But about six months ago my boyfriend made a new friend through a club at colleg, and they became close friends real quickly. They talk all the ...

A.   25 September 2017: He calls her for 2-3 hours? This is not normal in any way and I'm surprised you're this accepting of things. If he's not cheating then exactly what is he doing? Leading her on that's for sure! And are you telling me that it's acceptable for a person ... (read in full...)

She stopped responding, is that it?

Q.   Girl I liked a lot and went on a few dates with started getting cold after I told her I liked her and the time we had been hanging out. I asked her why she was acting so different and she said, she was dealing with stuff and I couldn't help her. She ...

A.   25 September 2017: She's not hinting... She's screaming from the rooftops that she's not interested. Stop pursuing her OP. Don't contact her or initiate conversations. How could you not understand such blatant signals?... (read in full...)

How do you cope and embrace change?

Q.   How do you cope with change. More so change within the work place. I work in an office and have been here for many years . I do like my job and the company i work. Obviosly i know things change and people come and go. At the moment we have a good ...

A.   23 September 2017: You have to learn to detach yourself. You have to realise that you are there at a professional level and not let external factors influence you. It's only normal to feel the way that you are, but for the sake of being realistic, try to not be so ... (read in full...)

Is the guy I'm dating being a jerk?

Q.   I started dating this guy about a month ago and we've been on four dates so far.. We haven't gone all the way yet but have done some stuff in bed, as well as the usual things like cinema etc. TBF to him he does have his good points like he pays for ...

A.   22 September 2017: I agree with aunt honesty. I don't think he's being a jerk but I do think that you and he are not a match. You seem to be nitpicking quite a bit and really trying hard to figure out the meaning behind innocuous words and actions of his. I thi... (read in full...)

My wife's sexual past has become a sticking point for me

Q.   OK this might be a bit long winded but here we go. So I have been happilyish married for nearly ten years now. I met my wife in 2003 while on my OE in London and we got together and started dating and then eventually the "how many people have you ...

A.   22 September 2017:  This is ridiculous!! It's like when yourrelationship has failed and you're trying to break up with your partner and then he/she says, "you said you loved me and couldn't live without me so what happened now? So how can you leave me now?" Why... (read in full...)

Heart says carry on, head says we are now toxic! Advice needed!

Q.   Hi. So my 8 year relationship seems to be at its end and I've been given an ultimatum. We split up or we stay together and try to make it work. Some background, we are a young couple, we have been together from a young age and have been through ...

A.   20 September 2017: You've invested 8 long years so I think you should give the relationship one last chance. It's very easy to let go but don't do it without a fight. Why have you drifted apart in the last two years? It's quite acceptable to actually sit in silen... (read in full...)

I'm worried I can't ask her to do the same thing again!

Q.   A few weeks ago I helped my girlfriend clean and put the dishes away. Afterwards she filled the sink with dishsoap and undressed me. She wanted me to sit on the counter over the edge of the sink. I was reluctant at first but I did it. She then used ...

A.   19 September 2017: I had the same thought as Aunt Cindy This is a troll who's just describing a sexual act to try and titillate and get a reaction. I don't even understand the point of the question other than to "brag" about getting a handjob with detergen... (read in full...)

A thank you to your advice!! I am now engaged. You are all the best!! Just a Thank you Post =)

Q.   Hi Everyone!! Thanks for your advice. I am engaged and getting married!! I came to your site because I am more of a private person and my mother passed away and don't have a sister. I love my friends but I'm not one to talk about gossip on my rel...

A.   19 September 2017: Thank you for such a nice post! Congratulations to you on the great news and hope you have a fabulous life ahead of you! Lots of love and good wishes..... (read in full...)

I'm worried my boyfriend is stealing from me.

Q.   Hi, I really need some advice - I've been in a very happy relationship for over six months now. My boyfriend is very loving and caring, and we've never even had an argument - we just seem very in tune with one another. But something odd happ...

A.   18 September 2017: I'm with Uncle Phil here. Either casualty bring it up and see how he responds or keep some more cash in your room a few days later and see what happens... (read in full...)

I'm not as turned on by my IRL girlfriend as I was with the LDR!

Q.   I've recently started dating a girl from my work who is the sweet, caring, interesting, real girlfriend material. Before her I was casually seeing a girl I met online, it was nothing serious, just dating and a lot of sex really. Now here's my ...

A.   18 September 2017: That's because with the other girl, it was just sex and no commitment, nothing. Just wham thank you ma'am and then you both go your ways. And because you know she's seeing you just for the sex and no other frills, you're always ready to perform. ... (read in full...)

Ex-boyfriend (considerably older) left me for someone else while being on holiday. I don't understand it and am now thinking of asking for closure.

Q.   Hi, will try to keep this as short as I can. A little background: A few months ago I met a charming older man (49 years old) and what began as a short romance started developing into something more serious and longer, with him (he lived in a diffe...

A.   17 September 2017: I think you should look at the silver linings... And trust me, there are more than a few here. He was close to double your age and think of all the troubles that you would have faced later had this worked out. Imagine having kids with him when he's ... (read in full...)

I'm in a relationship yet I find myself attracted to a friend. What to do?

Q.   I have been with my boyfriend for about a year now and I love him to death and I can't imagine life without him. When I was living overseas for some time, my elder brother had some room mates and every time we came back to see the house, I obviousl...

A.   11 September 2017: Do you honestly see any potential in a relationship which starts with the words, "if you get bored of your boyfriend then message me"? Also, if you loved your boyfriend "to death"(whatever that means) and clearly you don't, then this would ne... (read in full...)

I often think fondly of my ex but don't want to get back with him

Q.   Hi everyone. So I'll start with my ex. He was a lovely guy but there was no sex or passion. we were together a number of years but broke up a while ago now. i was okay. we are 'friends' but don't ever talk. I'm now with a new partner and thin...

A.   9 September 2017: You didn't have an ugly or messy break-up and you have good memories of your relationship. We tend to think that if someone is an ex then that person must be avoided like the plague and we shouldn't think of them in a good way but why should it be ... (read in full...)

Now that he's abroad he doesn't contact me at all!

Q.   Hi, I'm in a strange "relationship" with my colleague and I don't know what to do..One year ago I've got this new job..when i met with my coworker, it was instant chemistry, he always look at me, trying to contact me..but i heard he's a player s...

A.   9 September 2017: I didn't even need to get to the end of your post to know what was coming because his behaviour was/is so predictable! All he wanted from you was sex. Full stop. When he didn't get that, there was no reason to be in touch with you even for the ... (read in full...)

Job not how I thought, girlfriend dumping me

Q.   I'm having problem at work and I'm not enjoying it currently, ive had time off because of the stress it's caused and my assistant boss doesn't seem to want to leave me alone and he's up my backside every five minutes. I work for a sports company and ...

A.   8 September 2017: Quit drinking!! This isn't rocket science! You're making a mess out of a bad situation. Look dude, life isn't always fair and you won't have things go your way 90% of the time. But you can't deal with it by getting drunk and making a fool of ... (read in full...)

I'm having trouble putting an affair partner behind me

Q.   Hello everyone reading. About nine months ago me and a married man whom I had a two year emotional affair with ended completely with a mutual understanding that we could never have a relationship due to the mess we created in his life. When it ...

A.   7 September 2017: You don't sound like a bad person OP. You made a mistake but you had the courage and the conviction to change. Not many people in your position can do that. Peace comes from within and you have to work at forgiving yourself first. You have to lear... (read in full...)

She suggested a holiday but then didn't raise the topic. She finally said it was too expensive, is this a sign of problems ahead?

Q.   My girlfriend suggested we go away a few months ago on a specific date. Since then, shes never raised it - but I have on numerous occasions, offering to book things, asking if she was still interested, or even not wanting to go, and all the time she ...

A.   6 September 2017: I don't think it's any of what you think. I think it's a matter of her ego and the fact that she was too proud to admit that she couldn't afford it, despite having suggested it first. Maybe she thought over it and saw that it wasn't within her means ... (read in full...)

My boyfriend has just confessed that he slept with someone else

Q.   I'm after some advice, I have been with my boyfriend for 2 and a half years. I have never doubted our trust or believe he has ever done anything to jeopardise our relationship. Well that's what I thought until this Wednesday he called me down the...

A.   5 September 2017: What does your gut instinct tell you? If you were to close your eyes right now and take a decision this instant, what would you do? Do you think you can trust him again? Do you think the relationship will restore to it's previous setting if he ... (read in full...)

How do I explain my decision to skip the reunion without bad mouthing the Dean?

Q.   When I was in high school (a Catholic school), the Dean of Men was one of the worst people I ever known. He played favorites (if you were one of his favorites, you would never be in trouble no matter what you did but if you were not his favorite, ...

A.   5 September 2017: OP you'll come across many such miserable, pathetic people in your life. Why should you go around avoiding all of them and miss out on stuff that you would do otherwise if not for them? To hell with him, just ignore the man or at best, just wish him ... (read in full...)

A fight, zero contact for 3 weeks. He should apologize, not me. What should I do?

Q.   I left my BF 3 weeks ago after a fight. There's been zero contact since I left. I haven't contacted him and he hasn't contacted me. Yes, I'm the one who left, however he was the one who was in the wrong and should apologize. I'm not sure how to ...

A.   4 September 2017: What was the fight about? You say that you left him, does that mean that you broke up? Maybe he doesn't think he was wrong? Maybe he thinks you should make the attempt to contact him if you want to get back since you were the one who walked out? Or ... (read in full...)

What's the future for me as the other woman?

Q.   I am in a relationship with a wonderful man who I love and he loves me. We are very happy however I am "the other woman", even though our relationship is serious and we've been together for like 3 years, because he's cheated on his current/previous ...

A.   3 September 2017: Of course he could cheat on you... If he hasn't or isn't cheating already! Do you really think that this catch of a man is committed to you? He's a liar without any scruples and you actually think you're something special to him? You seem to be in ... (read in full...)

My wife of 30 years just confessed that she was not a virgin

Q.   my wife of 30 years confessed that she was not a virgin when we were married. I was not a virgin when we met and if she had told me before we were married I would have been fine with it. My problem is she made such a big deal of telling me she was ...

A.   2 September 2017: Why has this issue come up after 30 years of marriage? Why now? What's the background to this?... (read in full...)

I told him 10pm was too late for dinner and now he won't speak to me

Q.   Dear Cupid; I met a man on-line, he asked me to meet him at a nearby restaurant/bar at 9:00, he then changed the time to 9:15. I texted him when I got there never got a reply. I waited for 15 minutes and as I was getting ready to leave when he ...

A.   2 September 2017: Nope, you were not wrong. You gave him two chances and now you know that he doesn't value you and doesn't believe in punctuality. He also thinks he's the cat's whiskers. He isn't and you can do so much better. Move on please. ... (read in full...)

I can't get over a guy I dated for a month?

Q.   Hi aunts and uncles. I still have feelings for an ex that I was only with for one month and it's really troubling me. He wasn't my first boyfriend, and it wasn't my longest relationship, but I've never felt this way before. We had a lovely ...

A.   31 August 2017: The best way to get over him is not to date someone else. Who told you it was? The best way right now is to just be by yourself, surrounded yourself with friends and be positive without hooking up or being in a relationship. You need time to heal, ... (read in full...)

Need help rejecting someone

Q.   Hello! I need help rejecting a married man who is signaling that he wants to sleep with me. I am requesting mature and tactful answers as this person is in management at my employer. I innocently the first time and probably foolishly the second ...

A.   31 August 2017: I think you should be very firm and blunt about this because shameless people don't understand tact. Or he'll just pretend he doesn't to make things even more difficult for you. Don't agree to meet him outside of work, keep talks strictly prof... (read in full...)

It seems women lose interest in sex after a while ...

Q.   Why do women lose interest in sex after being in a relationship for a while? Maybe this Isn't the case with all women, but it seems to be like a continuously notorious pattern in my relationships. Women lose interest in sex but I still want it....

A.   30 August 2017: I'm not going to get into this epistemic debate but I'll try to answer your question. Women lose interest in sex because you're not giving them what they want. Do you know how a woman orgasms? Do you allow her the pleasure of having one each time... (read in full...)

My boyfriend says my friends took advantage of me.

Q.   Hello Everyone! Just wanted some insight on this situation. Last night, my boyfriend and I had friends over (my friend and his girlfriend) to watch the Game of Thrones season finale. I cooked a lot more than my boyfriend thought I should have but ...

A.   29 August 2017: Simple question, does your boyfriend have a problem with this male friend? His over-reacting is caused by something more than just concern for you exerting yourself. The fact that he thinks that you've gone out of your way to cook for him shows th... (read in full...)

My friend drunkenly ranted into my voicemail. Do I call him or wait for him to contact me?

Q.   So last night I was sat alone minding my own business when I received two phone calls , both left voicemails from a good friend of mine. He has helped me through a lot of relationship problems, he has made it clear he fancies me but he knows th...

A.   28 August 2017: No, don't contact him at all. This is exactly why we say that you never really know how a person really is from the inside unless you see them at a vulnerable moment. He/she may appear completely rational and normal outwardly but you have no idea ... (read in full...)

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