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*aley agony aunt

*aley

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*aley's profile:

Hi I'm a single 25 year old female from Australia. I'm well educated and have been through my fair share of life's ups and downs. I have learned a lot from the relationships I have been in. I also have excellent advice that I carry with me from friends that come from successful marriages. I have high morals and beliefs, but am still a real person of today. I don't expect anything above and beyond what's reasonable.

I am a very empathetic person which is why I feel I can be of help here also. Caring for others comes naturally to me, and I am interested in trying to understand all sides of a story. The human mind and the choices we make fascinate me.

I also believe in this day and age relationships aren't treated with the same respect as they used to be. We all go in and out of relationships, breaking hearts, as if it is just a part of 'life'. Everybody needs to learn to be in touch with their true emotions, and share the truth, rather than hide behind lies. Emotions are a delicate thing, and whether people are diving into casual or serious relationships, at some point a person is going to have emotional feelings regarding the situation. People were made for relationship, we need to take special care of this and only go into bonds with people who care about us in the same way.

How do I be fair to my new guy? And get over my ex, but not lead-on the new guy.

Q.   I'm nowhere near ready to date again. I'm still mourning the loss of this relationship (7 weeks of panic attacks and seperation anxiety--yes, I'm getting clinical help). Last Wednesday someone came back into my life out of the blue after a year of ...

A.   14 February 2012: I agree, tell him something similar to that paragraph (like someone has posted below). You need to be clear and direct, otherwise yes there's a high chance he will get hurt and start hoping for something that may never eventuate. I've been... (read in full...)

I think she has a problem with me being a Christian, is she a bad friend and should I stop hanging out with her?

Q.   I'm a Christian. I'm not a bible thumper, and I love the gays, and I swear, and you wouldn't know I was a Christian if I never told you. Last summer I got a job teaching kids art at an art school, and there I met a girl my age that was really ...

A.   14 February 2012: Hey there, Any friend should be happy to respect your beliefs. Just as you said you're not a 'bible thumper' - you don't throw it in her face and try and get her to follow Christianity. Unfortunately I think you will need to distance yourself... (read in full...)

How one person changed my life

Q.   I've been an aunt on this site now for quite a while, at first I started as an anonymous, until I finally took the step to make an account and dare to be identified somewhat. As I've gotten to know a few people on here, albeit still strangers ...

A.   12 February 2012: Truly touching article you have written. Thank you for sharing your story. xx ... (read in full...)

How do I let him go, when I'm not even sure that I can?

Q.   Hello again aunts and uncles. Title speaks for itself really! How do you let someone go from your life, when you genuinely don't think you can do it?? I know what people will say as i have commented on many posts just like this, "keep yourself b...

A.   12 February 2012: You could try writing a letter to the person but not sending it. This serves to let you vent all the things you still have issues with and release all the feelings you have. There is something about putting pen to paper. Then you can destroy the ... (read in full...)

Why can't I just erase everything from my ex?

Q.   I have deleted my ex's mobile number and all his/my messages to each other. Why/what is stopping me deleting him from facebook? He has a girlfriend but I believe he has restricted my access to his wall. Why can't I do the final 'nail in th...

A.   12 February 2012: It's always hard cutting someone out who previously meant so much. I think there's always a part of you who wants to hold onto who you 'thought' they were, or how they treated you before the problems/lies (usually in the beginning they are great ... (read in full...)

Online dating/friendships, general safety and security. Protecting yourself and your privacy.

Q.   I'm still shocked and surprized far too often by the number of people who have been stalked, harassed or "hacked" online when all they have to do is implement some very easy safety procedures. It is a known fact well over 90% of people who claim...

A.   9 February 2012: Excellent article. Thank you. ... (read in full...)

How can I learn to overcome homosexuality?

Q.   Hi cupid, quick question. I think I might be gay but I don't want to be. Nowadays when people say they are gay everybody jumps up saying its ok and that you're born that way and we don't have a choice and stuff like that but I don't think I believe ...

A.   8 February 2012: If you want to overcome it, then part of you isn't ok with it and part of you is. Have you had girlfriends? Just curious because I see your age group I'm wondering what life up until now has been like? You said you think you may be gay. Does... (read in full...)

Was he just scared of things heading towards a relationship? Or did he just use me emotionally and physically?

Q.   M lead me on for approximately 9 months. It started off as a normal friendship, however it quickly became intense with the knowledge of his life partner passing away a couple of years ago. For reasons unbeknown to me, he chose to get close to me ...

A.   8 February 2012: Thank you for taking the time to write to me as you have. I appreciate it very much. You have posted some very helpful points, thanks again. :)... (read in full...)

Was he just scared of things heading towards a relationship? Or did he just use me emotionally and physically?

Q.   M lead me on for approximately 9 months. It started off as a normal friendship, however it quickly became intense with the knowledge of his life partner passing away a couple of years ago. For reasons unbeknown to me, he chose to get close to me ...

A.   7 February 2012: Thank you for your 3 responses. Thank you Spanner28. I have read them all and really appreciate it. In regards to the second responder, the only reason I got really confused was because he would literally say he saw a future with me - gettin... (read in full...)

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