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... Send *icola79 a private message | | | *icola79's profile:Hello all, my name is Nicola and im 27 years old.
I am married to a lovely man(my soul mate). I am a very caring person and I do not judge people,I love to try and help others and love feedback,so if I do ansew your problems please feel free to let me know if I helped you in any way,or if you think I could do something better.
I love animals and children and frown uppon people who hurt or are cruel to them.
I live in England(Sheffield) and work in a hospital,I am going to be putting all my spare time into this web site so please feel free to contact me.
Thankyou for your time in reading what I had to say.xxxxx |
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Should I wait around for him to make up his mind, or should I let him go ?
Q. Ok. Here's the deal. About 2 months ago, I began to like a very good friend of mine. I'll call him 'Pete'. I've known him two years now. There's a problem though. Him and my other friend were dating for 4 years and broke it off recently, maybe ...
A. 22 May 2007: well maybe just give him a bit longer? its how you feel really,personally i would ask him where his feelings lie and if he says that he doesnt know then maybe you should tell him that you really like him and want to be with him but its not right for ... (read in full...)
When should you meet your partners parents ?
Q. At what point in a relationship should each side "meet the parents"? I met a guy in October 2006 and our relationship is progressing. My parents want to meet him. He hasn't brought up anything regarding me meeting his parents. He's 14 years older ...
A. 22 May 2007: well its obvious that you love eachother cus why would you still be together. i would take him to meet your family,i cant see any reason why you shouldnt? your family must want to meet him,you have been with eachother a while now.
maybe he is wati... (read in full...)
I cheated although not sexually, I'm pregnant with twins, but my bf doesnt think they are his!!!
Q. Hi, A few months ago i cheated on my b/f of 2 1/2 yrs. I met a bloke off the internet and spent 3 nites with him. We didnt have any sexual contact as such although we did kiss and we both wanted to but i couldnt go through with it as i realised...
A. 22 May 2007: then if he wants counselling you must try and find out where there is one to go to. try going or ringing your local advice centre and maybe they can give you a number or two.
with him wanting counselling it does show that he wants this rela... (read in full...)
After our second date I discovered he lives with someone, but will he really leave her ?
Q. We starting going out about two months ago.After te second date I found out,he lives with someone-girlfriend.I was broken.He told me,he likes me and he will get her out,cause he wants to be with me.But since than not much changed...he saiz,she is ...
A. 22 May 2007: well yes if you do keep putting up with this then it will get harder and harder to put right.
like you said you have only been with him a couple of months so i would give it just a little bit longer because this girl will have to find somewhere else... (read in full...)
I'm 18 hes 22, would it be holding him back or inappropriate to date him ?
Q. i have just started seeing a guy who is really lovely however he is only just 18 and im 22 this year. Is this weird or inappropriate? he looks and acts older than he is and all his mates are older than him but i am concerned people will think im...
A. 22 May 2007: this is not a big deal,he is only 4 years younger,if the bith of you are happy then stuff what people think.
he knows his own mind and from what you say he does so dont worrry.
just because you are with him,it doesnt mean that he cant further ... (read in full...)
Can I ever learn to trust my husband again after his lies?
Q. Can I ever learn to trust my husband again? I just found out 6 month ago that my husband has to children from a previous marraige. We have been dating for 6 years and have been married for two. Its not that I didn't ask he just flat out lied, an...
A. 22 May 2007: you need to sit down with him,dont shout it him but ask him why he felf he couldnt talk to you about this?
i would be really hurt if i was you and tell him this. ask why he doesnt see his children and would he like to. it may be that his ex is maki... (read in full...)
Should I tell my girlfriend that our mutual friend doesn't like her?
Q. A mutual friend of my girlfriend and I recently told me that she doesn't like my girlfriend at all. My girlfriend always talks about how much she likes this friend and invites her out all the time. Should I tell my girlfriend? I feel like I'm lying ...
A. 22 May 2007: well yes i would tell your gf. why is this "friend" saying this about her. its not nice and maybe she may be doing this because she has a crush on you???
you need to tell your gf because if she finds out from someone else and finds out that you know... (read in full...)
How can I get him to have sex with me again?
Q. I hate feeling like a best friend instead of a wife. The lack of intimacy in this relationship is making me feel less like a lover and more like a friend with each passing day. I feel like I am someone to spend time with, to cuddle with, and to hang ...
A. 22 May 2007: maybe he has a problem that he doesnt think he can talk to you about. you may be best bringing it up again and ask him if something is wrong?
tell him that he can tell you anything and that if he does have a problem then you can work through it toge... (read in full...)
How can I get to meet a nice girl? I've been single for 5 years now.
Q. I, need advice on how to get a girlfriend. Can any ladies out there help. I'm 29 and have been single for over 5 years now. But the fact is , that i never get to meet them. I never meet any through friends, as half of my friends have never had a ...
A. 22 May 2007: you dont seem to think too much of your self,why is this.
you dont need to get drunk to be with a girl you know. you just have to have faith in yourself ok.
i think more woman are put off when drunken men make a pass on them,because we tend to ... (read in full...)
My husband recently told me he didn't want to get married to me at first, but is okay with the relationship now. I feel so hurt. What shall I do?
Q. My name is Linda* and my husband and i have been married for nearly two years. Before we got married and were also engaged, he broke up with me. I tried unsuccessfully for eight consecutive months to try and get him to stay. I'd mostly given up but ...
A. 22 May 2007: yes i think i would be hurt as well. this is something i just couldnt forget. i hope with all my heart that he loves you and is glad now that he married you.
i think i would have to sit him down and ask how he feels about your relationship now,... (read in full...)
How can i stop myself getting so overwhelmed and wanting to have sex with him, when i know its not right?
Q. just to give a lil bit of background information first: i go to school in the uk and i met a lad called rob and we talk and flirt and once at the end of break we went somewhere quiet and had a lil kiss. For the next few months we flirt etc then o...
A. 22 May 2007: you cant help how your body reacts to things but you seem very smart.if you dont want to do this then dont. maybe dont spend too much time alone with eachother,try going out as a group or something.
its so so easy to give in to things,but like you ... (read in full...)
How do I tell my family that I want to spend the rest of my life with my girlfriend? She is a bit older and I'm afraid they might not approve?
Q. Hey everyone! Iam a 21 male and my GF is 24! We are already talking about spending the rest of our lives together. Her family knows about me but my parents do not know about her. Only my sister does. I want to tell my parents about her but I dont ...
A. 22 May 2007: this is not a big age gap,its only 3 years sweety. yes they may be worried that you are rushing into things but if you are 100% sure this is what you want then i think they will understand.
i dont know how long you have been together but maybe dont... (read in full...)
How can I be with my boyfriend when the money is tight and the visas are causing a problem?
Q. well here it is. I met a guy when i was working abroad and what was supposed to be a fling became a full on relationship and we fell for each other. I have since returned home and have been back for nearly a year. Somehow we have managed to keep the ...
A. 22 May 2007: i do feel for you. i know what im like when my husband works nights and i miss him,so god knows how you feel right now???
keep trying and dont give up and it will all work out for the best,if you are both determined you can do anything so dont worr... (read in full...)
If a female has a piercing between her bottom lip and chin does that mean she's bi-sexual?
Q. If a female has a piercing between her bottom lip and chin does that mean she's bi-sexual? I've been told that kind of piercing mean the person is bisexual... just wanted to know if its true or not?...
A. 22 May 2007: no no no,i dont know who told you this.
it means that she liked the idea of having it pierced so she had it done,its as simple as that sweety.
dont read too much into things,some people say daft things to make you look silly.
... (read in full...)
Why would he even ask if I want a threesome with two of his friends?
Q. Why would someone I am dating come up with a wierd question like do I want to have a threesome with two of his freinds not even him included and says If I do he can hook me up? Is he testing meor letting me know he really doesn't care for me?...
A. 22 May 2007: it could be either sweety. hmmmmmmmmmmmmmm!!!!!!!!
if i was asked this by my partner i would run a mile,but this is just my view. i have to be truefull,i judt dont like the sound of it. i can just picture it now, him boasting to his mates sayi... (read in full...)
SITE NEWS: Video introduction to the site from Andrew, site founder!
Q. Message from Andrew, site founder: (let me know your comments!)...
A. 22 May 2007: how lovely to see you. great job sweety,keep up the good work. its nice to be back. xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx... (read in full...)
Is your husband a space filler??
Q. I wish to ask ladies, as to how many of you really consider their husband to be a valuable person in their life, rather than being a space filler? ...
A. 16 March 2007: I 100% love and worship my husband. He is such a good person and has been there for me,i couldnt even think what my life would be like without him. He is NOT a space filler,he is just my lovely,perfect,caring husband.
I hope this has helped you.... (read in full...)
Got drunk and kissed mymates ex...what do I do??
Q. I'm a horrible horrible person. I got drunk one night and kissed my best friends ex boyfriend. Nothing else really happened but even though she broke it off with him she is still really cut up about it. They went out for 5 years. He wants to keep it ...
A. 16 March 2007: I think you should tell your friend,how would she feel if she found out from someone else? plus things can be added to so you know if you tell her,she is getting the right story. Tell her you was sooooooo drunk and ever since then you have been ... (read in full...)
Married but want my friend to be more!
Q. Dear Cupid..... I have been married for almost four years. I met a nice man about a month before the wedding, and we are great friends.... but i want there to be more. It is destroying my marriage because i cant talk to my husband about it, and it i...
A. 16 March 2007: Does this friend of yours feel the same way you feel? I dont think its fair on your husband,to stay with him if you no longer want to.
I would talk with him and just say you are sorry but you just dont feel the same about him anymore. Also you need... (read in full...)
How can I tell my mom we're engaged and living together... she'll freak if I tell her!
Q. Well I'm another female in a 20 year age difference relationship with my fiance, I'm 22 and he is 41. He's a wonderful guy, I met his family and friends and they're all happy for us once getting to know me and already knowing him. No he's not my ...
A. 15 March 2007: Your mom just wants the best for you but you are old enough to make your own mind up. Yes I think you should tell her your news but if you feel she will co crazy, maybe send a letter. Tell her you love her and will always be there for her but just ... (read in full...)
My friend is kind of down just now and is thinking of quitting her band but to be in a band was her dream! What can I say to her?
Q. My friend has started to get depressed again. She has been depressed before, but then had come out of it. I'm not very good at advice I admit, but she always tells me how bad I am and that I never listen to her. I really don't know what to do. She's ...
A. 15 March 2007: I think your friend should be happy to have a friend like you,i know you are worried about her but that doesnt give her the right to treat you like she is doing.
Tell her that you are there for her and will help her to speak to her parents or her ... (read in full...)
Hes says Im nagging all the time, but Im the one that as to go out of my way to see him, I feel second best, what can I do!?
Q. I need some advice,I just dont know what to do anymore... My bf of nearly 2 years broke it off with me for the 3rd time a couple of days ago.I was expecting it 2 come soon.He's fed up with me 'naggin' him about the 'same stuff'.The thing is he's alw...
A. 14 March 2007: You are right,I dont think he will change,you have let him get away with it so many times. It doesnt sound like he wants a relationship flower and no matter how much you try to change him it just wont work,so do your self a big big favour and do not ... (read in full...)
Our son died, and he asked his ex to get back with him!! Its a year on and I cant get past it!!!
Q. Hi, I got together with my boyfriend about a year and 4 months ago. We met through family. When I met him I thought he was the perfect person I had ever met. I knew it was my time to be happy. Since my ex boyfriend 4 years earlier treated ...
A. 14 March 2007: Oh emma,im so so sorry to here this and my heart goes out to you. You will never forget your lovely boy and neither will your bf,but he sounds like a prat. I know he has gone through this aswell but dont forget he was intouch with his ex before this ... (read in full...)
How can I find a male figure that my child and I can depend on?
Q. I am pregnant (as you may have gurssed by the name) and i don't really know the father. In fact, i was stupid enough to get in the car with a complete stranger. I was worried about finding a father figure for my child, as i dont want him or her ...
A. 14 March 2007: You dont need to find a father figure for your baby,as long as you love him/her,thats all that counts.
Do you have a dad or brothers?if so then dont you think that they will be there for your baby? You just enjoy your life with your baby and if you ... (read in full...)
What does it mean when a boy says he likes you yet only acts like it when we are alone?
Q. Helooo!, what does it mean when a boy says that he likes you, but only acts like it when we are alone ...? i really REALLY like this boy! we haev done some things together, but when we are at school he doesnt act like he likes me and then suddenly ...
A. 14 March 2007: Well you are both soooooooo young and girls grow up faster than boys. I really hope if you are having sex,you are using a condom,you are too young but if you are just remember the pill is good but it doesnt stop infections so be carefull sweety.
R... (read in full...)
He sent me a text message saying he wants to slow our relationship down, now I'm so confused!
Q. Hi I need some help! I have been going with my boyfriend for 3 months and i am madly in love with him and he says that he loves me! Last night he sent me a txt message saying that he wants to slow our relationship down because he thinks that i...
A. 14 March 2007: I can understand how you must be feeling but dont push things,he may just need a bit of time to him self flower.
Dont forget he was with his ex for a long time and then more or less went straight out with you.
He must like you otherwise he would ha... (read in full...)
What can I say to this guy? I hear nothing for 3 weeks then out of the blue I get a text from him saying he misses me!
Q. hi need help!!!! well i met this guy a few weeks ago when i was out in a club to be honest with you iv known since i was 13yrs old but recently bumped into him we swapped numbers and met up when we were out thing progressed but when it came to going ...
A. 14 March 2007: He is either shy or he is messing you around sweety, either way this relationship doesnt sound right to me!!!!
If you are wanting this to work you need to talk to him and find out what he is wanting out of it? and if its not the same as you want... (read in full...)
I want to go to the doctor to see about an embarrassing problem, if I took my dad could I go into see the doctor alone?
Q. Hey, i know i have foreskin that doesnt retreact a lot, i have never seen my whole penis head exposed, and have really bad smegma recently, im really concerned and want to go to the docter and maybe result to getting circumsision to make it go away, ...
A. 10 March 2007: Are you under 16? if so I think your dad may have to go with you but you could always ring the doctors up monday and ask them if you would be aloud to see the doctor alone or not. If you do have to take your dad dont worry he will understand. ... (read in full...)
I can't understand my girlfriend just now... any advice?
Q. i'm the guy who wrote regarding my girlfriend wanting to stop seeing me for a week even though see still loves and cares for me. she said she doesn't feel good arond me at the moment that it doesn't feel right that shes not happy.i don't understand ...
A. 10 March 2007: Why has she got to say how long she wants to stop seeing eachother for? I think I replyed to you last time, it sounds like she is maybe looking for another relationship but keeping yo close so that if things dont work out for her then she has you to ... (read in full...)
I exercise every day and eat healthy, I don't know what else to do to drop some weight...
Q. Hi, Lately I've been getting really down about my weight. I'm not exactly huge, but I'm not happy with myself. I've felt this way for most of my life, and I've lost weight but I'm still not happy. It's come to the point where I'm obsessive about ...
A. 10 March 2007: Everyone has something about there body they dont like,so so be too bad on your self. You are young and in a fiew more years when your body has matured a bit more you will notice nice curves,and like your body. Yes exercise is good as long as you ... (read in full...)
I am on the brink of disaster and losing my grip because of this girl. Any advice?
Q. Hello Friends I am in love and I mean crazy love I cant sleep or eat.I am sad all the time because I like her I mean really because I thinks she is the most beautiful girl I ever saw I am a little older than her but love knows no limits. Anyw...
A. 10 March 2007: How old are you? if you are the age I can see on this page which is 13-15, dont you think you are just a bit too young to be feeling the way you do? If she is younger than you I dont dare think of her age.
You will feel like this loads and load... (read in full...)
Why should he be the one having the good time!
Q. I broke up with my boyfriend 2 months ago because he cheated on me but now i have to live with him because unfortunately i was very silly having ever got together with him because he is my flatmate in halls. He's now seeing other girls and the re...
A. 10 March 2007: Firts of all everyone makes mistakes other wise how would we learn? He is a waste of space by the sounds of things and you will find someone that will love you,so dont worry.
If he is bringing these girls back you must tell him that he just cant... (read in full...)
Why does she come in and out of my life??
Q. hey ladies, Any help will do. Well here it goes I was with my ex girlfriend for about a year and a half when all of a sudden she broke up with me for no reason at all. She changed her number on me and just vanished from my life. After about 2 months...
A. 8 March 2007: Dont put your self down sweety,she is just being horrible and sounds like she is using you when she is at a loose end. Dont be a door mat and tell her you are really fed up with the way she is treating you. Tell her to either buck her ideas up or ... (read in full...)
How can I get over this feeling that I am not good enough for my boyfriend?
Q. How can I get over this feeling that I am not good enough for my boyfriend? I am 15 and I always have this guilty feeling inside me that I am hurting him. I am not doing anything though, but i feel as though he doesnt deserve me. Its an awefully ...
A. 8 March 2007: Has he said something to you to make you feel like this? you are still very young and have a lot more growing up to do. Just be your self and enjoy your life.
Make sure he doesnt pressure you into something you do not want to do swweety. xxxx... (read in full...)
I feel so submissive. I want more but where does that leave him?
Q. I have been with my boyfriend for 6 years and we have a two year old little girl. I think I love him but I don't care about our relationship anymore. For years I've begged for attention and ask him to respect how I feel about things and although ...
A. 8 March 2007: You are still so young and you cant spend the rest of your life in a relationship that just isnt working. Even your child will know that mummy isnt happy,which will make him unhappy. Tell your boyfriend that you cant carry on like this anymore and ... (read in full...)
How can I get him to spend more time with me and the kids?
Q. I have been married to my husband for nearly 12 years and we have been together since I was 14. We have 3 young children. He plays darts on a grand scale and it seems to be the one thing we always fall out about. He puts it before me and the kids ...
A. 8 March 2007: When he says that he cant let the team down, what about you and his kids then? you have to be strong sweety and say how this is affecting your family, tel him you are not putting up with it anymore and instead of spending the money down the pub what ... (read in full...)
I asked this guy I fancy if he was free and I was shocked at his response.
Q. I Really fancy this guy but I asked him if he was free and he said he has a girlfriend and that its "just fucken " with me "in a strictly plutonic". I was shocked by his response as I thought he really liked me as he had told me 2 months previous ...
A. 8 March 2007: I wouldnt waste anymore time on this person as he seems like a player and just wants to hurt you. I wouldnt run around after him, just get on with your life and enjoy your self.
I understand you are hurt by what he has done but wouldnt you rath... (read in full...)
Was he just trying to make me feel better say that he liked me?
Q. dear agony aunts, a few months ago i got with a guy i thought i really liked. a few of his bad habits annoyed me a lot. i felt smothered so in about a week i broke it off. the trouble had been i didnt know him well enough. i started dating another ...
A. 8 March 2007: I do agree with Dr John,you are still so very young and you do need time to get to know each other better.
He may just not want to hurt you because if he did go straight out with you it may just be a rebound thing.
Do as Dr John says and stay fri... (read in full...)
I think I'm falling for my ex's best mate!!!
Q. i need some advice i think im falling for my exs best mate and i dont know what to do even before i got with ma ex also ma lil boys dad i knew there was some kinda feelings i had for jay, rob only became mates with jay bout 6months after we got ...
A. 8 March 2007: Then you must talk to him sweety, ask him if he has any feelings for you and tell him how you feel.
Just say you dont want to be messed around as you have a child and dont want him getting hurt.
If you dont want to say anything to him like that,the... (read in full...)
Should I tell her to stop contacting me, or should I try to suck it up until I get back into town and see what happens?
Q. My ex (age 23) and I (age 26) had been in a long distance relationship for 3 years, spending about 5 months of every year around each other. She broke it off saying that she was unsure I was the one for her. She says she hasn't ruled out getting ...
A. 5 March 2007: What it sounds like to me is she doesnt want to cheat on you so she broke the relationship,which in a way thats a good thing but its left you hangin around for her.
I would ask her to stop ringing you because its not helping things at all. You dont... (read in full...)
SITE NEWS: Had DearCupid changed your life in a positive way? I want to hear your stories...
Q. Has DearCupid changed your life in a positive way? If so, please let me know. Either post here (anon if you prefer) or send me a private mail. Sometimes when I'm coding at midnight or tinkering with an errant database, or wondering wh...
A. 5 March 2007: Well I joined this sight a fiew weeks ago,im off work at the moment wating for a back opp and was feeling board and wanted to do somthing differant and just by chance I found this web site and thought WHY NOT.
I cant believe how lovely people here... (read in full...)
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