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... Send *rank B Kermit a private message | | | *rank B Kermit's profile:Frank Kermit, MA is an Expert Relationship and Dating Coach. He is a Best Selling Author, educator, and regular media correspondent.
He teaches men and women about their emotional needs, how to address each others emotional needs, to be applied to ongoing loving relationships. In 2011, Frank completed an Advanced Certificate in Trauma Counseling and in 2014 completed a certificate in Hypnotherapy.
Frank Kermit has a newsletters that the public can sign up for:
http://www.franktalks.com/newsletter/ (upcoming media spots)
and when you sign up, you get a 400+ page ebook for free (a collection of 100 of Frank's best articles)
Frank answers public questions on dearcupid.org when and IF he has the time. Please understand that Frank makes a professional living through his Date Coaching, and therefore his private paying clients must come first. Frank does not answer private questions received on dearcupid.org unless you want to hire him for some private one on one coaching via skype or over the phone. You can learn more about Frank's Coaching services at www.franktalks.com/
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| Latest articles: Off Limits Dating
No replies yet... 18 September 2013: Is Someone Off Limits for Dating? By Frank Kermit ND, Relationships Mastering the art of dating requires a number of skills such as being socially calibrated, effective communication and knowing what you want. One of the areas that comes up for ...
How to Deal with a Toxic Person
No replies yet... 18 September 2013: The Best Way To Deal With Toxic People By Frank Kermit ND, Relationships Toxic people are defined in this article as people who lack the capacity to reason, or people have the capacity to reason but just do not want to reason with you. In t...
A Broken Engagement is Better Than A Happy Divorce
No replies yet... 31 August 2013: A Broken Engagement is Better Than A Happy Divorce By Frank Kermit ND, Relationships One of the ironies of couples counseling that I often find myself doing is taking the couple through the pre-marital coaching process when they may already be...
A Frank Comment on Miley Cyrus
This question has 6 answers by readers of DearCupid.ORG.
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31 August 2013: A Frank Comment On Miley Cyrus By Frank Kermit ND, Relationships I do not normally comment on the antics of popular culture, as so much of what we see of movies and TV are fiction based romances and relationships. I tried my best to stay fo...
The Wedding Speech
No replies yet... 26 July 2013: The Wedding Speech Remember this day, your wedding day. Not for the dresses and suits, not for the extravagance, nor the dinner and dancing, but remember your wedding day because of the reasons you chose to marry your spouse. Remember who is it that...
Sexually Incompatible Couples
No replies yet... 19 July 2013: Sexually Incompatible Couples Sex is not the most important thing in a relationship. However, couples who love each other dearly and connect on so many levels, but whom are sexually incompatible tend to find that sex can be at the core of a numb...
Separation and Dating, Part 2 of 2
No replies yet... 28 June 2013: Separation and Dating, Part 2 of 2 Separation does not automatically lead to divorce unless you let it. It is up to you and your partner to put in the work so that it does not happen. In the event you are the only one trying to work on yourself and ...
Separation and Dating Part 1 of 2
No replies yet... 22 June 2013: Separation and Dating Part 1 of 2 One of the most damaging actions an individual can take is to start dating someone new when going through a separation with their serious long term partner (spouse, common-law partner or a defacto-union). When I use ...
The Frank Break Up Formula
No replies yet... 14 June 2013: The Frank Break Up Formula By Frank Kermit ND, Relationships Breaking up with someone is rarely an enjoyable or pleasant experience. In fact, there are those individuals who stay in less than satisfying relationships, and even can go all the ...
The Frank Romance Formula part 3 of 3
No replies yet... 8 June 2013: The Frank Romance Formula Part 3 By Frank Kermit ND, Relationships Continued from last article: The Frank Romance Formula is: A. (Stimulation of the 5 senses) + B. (Addressing the emotional needs of that person) + C. (Sensual/Sexual Contex...
The Frank Romance Formula Part 2 of 3
No replies yet... 3 June 2013: The Frank Romance Formula Part 2 By Frank Kermit ND, Relationships Continued from last article: The Frank Romance Formula is: A. (Stimulation of the 5 senses) + B. (Addressing the emotional needs of that person) + C. (Sensual/Sexual Contex...
The Secret Of Seduction is that it Happens in the Future
This question has 2 answers by readers of DearCupid.ORG.
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3 May 2013: The Secret Of Seduction is that it Happens in the Future By Frank Kermit ND, Relationships The future is where actual seduction takes place. That is the key to seduction. It has very little to do with turning someone on when you see them. I...
The S.L.A.P. Theory Of Life Lessons
This question has 1 answer by a reader of DearCupid.ORG.
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27 April 2013: The S.L.A.P. Theory Of Life Lessons By Frank Kermit ND, Relationships Sometimes life will slap you down when it has a lesson to teach you. For some people, the slap may be a light swat, and for others the slap has to be a severe smack down. ...
Dating With Disabilities
No replies yet... 5 April 2013: Dating With Disabilities by Frank Kermit ND, Relationships I once went on a date with a woman that had severe food allergies. We went out to a movie and I wished she had told me ahead of time. Although she mentioned that she was deathly all...
Rejection: The Worst Best Thing That Can Ever Happen
No replies yet... 21 March 2013: Rejection: The Worst Best Thing That Can Ever Happen By Frank Kermit ND, Relationships Rejection is the worst best thing that can ever happen to you. Managing rejection is a necessary part in managing your love life. Over the course of your ...
Things they do not tell you about having kids
This question has 2 answers by readers of DearCupid.ORG.
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15 March 2013: Things They Do Not Tell You About Having Kids By Frank Kermit ND, Relationships I always try to be very practical and realistic in my articles. This can come across very negative, given that my topic is Relationships (and all things relative...
When Friendship Is Meaningless
No replies yet... 8 March 2013: Friendship Is Meaningless Stop Hanging Out With Friends Who Sexually Reject You By Frank Kermit ND, Relationships Friendship is meaningless. There I said it. Now before you shoot one of your nasty emails to the editor, actually read this colum...
Who Cares What People Think? Depends...
This question has 1 answer by a reader of DearCupid.ORG.
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1 March 2013: How Much Should You Care About What Other People Think? By Frank Kermit ND, Relationships T here will be times when we want to do something in our lives that is meaningful to us. It could be a decision related to abandoning education, wh...
Learn How to Choose the Right Fights!
No replies yet... 21 February 2013: Pick And Choose Your Fights By Frank Kermit ND, Relationships Fighting in relationships is normal. The issue is not whether you fight. The issue is HOW a couple fights. Do they talk out their disagreements? Do they wait until they are alon...
Starting Over After V-day?
No replies yet... 14 February 2013: Starting Over? By Frank Kermit ND, Relationships Valentine’s day can be a day of reckoning for some people. Meaning, the events leading up to, on the day of, and afterwards can really wreck your life. This is one of the reasons I often refer to...
A Relationship is: Acceptance at the Worst, Loving at the Best
No replies yet... 6 February 2013: A Relationship is: Acceptance at the Worst, Loving at the Best By Frank Kermit, Relationships At my weekly relationship workshop last Saturday I issued one of my famous “Frankisms” that seemed to really resonate with the attendees. I was trying...
Asking Hard Questions
No replies yet... 1 February 2013: Asking Hard Questions By Frank Kermit ND, Relationships When trying to decide if you should be committed to someone, moving in with someone, getting engaged, and getting married, each new transition brings about the unpleasant task of askin...
Ex Lovers and Weddings Do Not Mix
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24 January 2013: Ex Lovers and Weddings Do Not Mix By Frank Kermit, Relationships If you ever had sex with someone that is about to get married, and have been invited to the wedding, do not go. This is especially true if the spouse-to-be feels uncomfortable havi...
Couples in Transition: Monogamy and Non-monogamy
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16 January 2013: Couples in Transition: Monogamy and Non-monogamy By Frank Kermit ND, Relationships Couples who are experiencing a transition in the status of their relationship may sometimes look to explore new ways of redefining their sex lives b...
Common Sense For Common Scents By Frank Kermit, Relationships
This question has 1 answer by a reader of DearCupid.ORG.
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13 December 2012: Common Sense For Common Scents By Frank Kermit, Relationships As the holiday season approaches, invitations begin to swarm in for get-togethers from family, friends and even office parties. It is a time of people coming together, and in some ca...
Couples in Transition
No replies yet... 29 November 2012: Couples in Transition By Frank Kermit, Relationships When a couple is going through a change in the status of their relationship they are a couple in transition. This includes couples that are transitioning from monogamy to non-monogamy, from no...
Your Home Is Your Seduction
No replies yet... 15 November 2012: Your Home Is Your Seduction By Frank Kermit, Relationships Your date is coming over to your place! You have seen each other a couple of times already, but this is different. This is YOUR PLACE, not some coffee shop or movie theatre or restaur...
The Movie Of Your Life’s Journey
No replies yet... 6 November 2012: The Movie Of Your Life’s Journey By Frank Kermit, Relationships The movie of your life is how we each envision our lives unfolding throughout our life span. This concept goes beyond simple fantasizing of what your life would be like. Writing ...
What Love Masks by Frank Kermit
This question has 7 answers by readers of DearCupid.ORG.
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2 November 2012: What Love Masks By Frank Kermit, Relationships A mentor of mine taught me that love is not blind; it is just that categories are rigid. When you meet someone, you put that person in a category (lover, friend, temptation, fling, does-no...
The Chocolate Made It Too Much Work: An Article About EFT and Weight Loss
No replies yet... 2 November 2012: The Chocolate Made It Too Much Work An Article About EFT and Weight Loss I have a confession. I used to daydream about food. You know that point in the day when someone catches you; your head in your hands, that dreamy look on your face? If so...
Have You Tried NOT Dating Your Type?
No replies yet... 1 November 2012: Have You Tried NOT Dating Your Type? By Frank Kermit, Relationships We all have our “type”. By “type” I am referring to that type of person each of us is madly attracted too. Each of us has our preference of what we like, what turns us on, ...
Is there such a thing as Happily Single?
No replies yet... 19 October 2012: Is there such a thing as Happily Single? By Frank Kermit, Relationships Is being single really that bad? After all, when a person considers the amount of pain that a relationship or casual dating can cause, it may seem that just skipping the w...
Be Thankful For a Broken Heart
No replies yet... 11 October 2012: Be Thankful For A Broken Heart By Frank Kermit, Relationships Ok, I hate this. I really hate this part of the process. However, it is a necessary part of the process, and if I am expected to help encourage others to do it, first I have to demo...
Stop Talking About Your Ex On Dates!
No replies yet... 5 October 2012: Stop Talking So Much About Your Ex By Frank Kermit, Relationships So you are on a date with someone new. You are excited. You are nervous. You hope that this is finally going to be the one. You meet. So far, you both like what you see. This...
Dating in Social Circles
No replies yet... 29 September 2012: Dating In Social Circles By Frank Kermit, Relationships Dating can be tricky. Does the other person like you the way you think he or she might? Do you really like that person enough to get more serious, or do you want to keep it more casual a...
Frank Guide to Speed Dating
No replies yet... 21 September 2012: Frank Guide To Speed Dating By Frank Kermit, Relationships Every way to meet someone new is a good way. Though friends, through the Internet, blind dates, approaching someone you want to meet, at a workshop, matchmaking companies, business conv...
Relationship Goal Setting
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15 September 2012: Relationship Goal Setting By Frank Kermit, Relationships Setting goals in most areas of your life can be challenging. When it comes to relationships, there are even more challenges. Whereas in other areas of your life such as education, emplo...
Battling The Savior Complex in Relationships
No replies yet... 6 September 2012: Battling The Savior Complex By Frank Kermit, Relationships As children, many of us grew up on stories about the hero that saves a person, and in the process, earned the undying love and loyalty of the person saved so that the hero and that saved ...
Get Out Of Your Own Way!
No replies yet... 30 August 2012: Get Out Of Your Own Way By Frank Kermit, Relationships One of the biggest obstacles that a person can have as an obstruction on their path of finding happiness, peace and healing for their love life, is themselves. Although most people wou...
Your Choices Today Become The Past You Have To Share Tomorrow
No replies yet... 26 August 2012: Your Choices Today Become The Past You Have To Share Tomorrow By Frank Kermit, Relationships Young adults tend to discount how the choices they make today will impact their futures tomorrow. At least, when it comes to relationships. The bes...
Are You A Partner Or A Liability?
This question has 1 answer by a reader of DearCupid.ORG.
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17 August 2012: Are You A Partner Or A Liability? When it really is you and not them By Frank Kermit, Relationships “It’s not you, it’s me.” Have you ever heard that said to you when someone broke up with you? Have you ever been the one to use it when dump...
The 7 Weird Words That Help Define Relationships
No replies yet... 9 August 2012: The 7 Weird Words That Help Define Relationships By Frank Kermit, Relationships There are 7 certain words that catch many people off guard when it comes to relationships. They are: Lust, Love, Sex, Dating, Commitment, Marriage, and Monogamy. ...
Fear of Conflict Is Rooted in The Fear Of Loss.
No replies yet... 20 July 2012: Fear of Conflict Is Rooted in The Fear Of Loss By Frank Kermit, Relationships Are you too nice when it comes to relationships? Do you walk on eggshells because you do not want to upset your partner? Are you reluctant to enforce your bounda...
Re-Establishing Trust in a Relationship Article
This question has 2 answers by readers of DearCupid.ORG.
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12 July 2012: Broken Trust Takes More Than Time To Re-Establish By Frank Kermit, Relationships Trust is one of the most important components of a relationship. Love is a great start, but it takes more than loving someone, or being loved by someone, to make ...
Understanding Emotional Needs
This question has 2 answers by readers of DearCupid.ORG.
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4 July 2012: Understanding Emotional Needs: What We Respond To Versus What We Should Like By Frank Kermit, Relationships Emotional needs are about what a person responds to. It has nothing to do with what a person should like. We all should be attracte...
Red Flags: What To Watch Out For On A Date
No replies yet... 29 June 2012: Red Flags: What To Watch Out For On A Date By Frank Kermit, Relationships When you are on a date, and the person you are getting to know says or does something that triggers a well-honed instinct that you need to stop dating that person, you hav...
The Art of Storytelling on a Date
No replies yet... 25 June 2012: Art of Storytelling: Make or Break A Relationship Happy Ending By Frank Kermit, Relationships One of the challenges that people face when they go on dates is that they may not factor in that others will not understand what they are trying ...
Swinger Beginner Advice
No replies yet... 25 June 2012: Swinger Beginners: Keep it Out of the Work Place By Frank Kermit, Relationships Dear Frank, My husband and I recently returned from a business trip/vacation where a few of my husband's co-workers also brought their wives. We really hit it o...
When your Ex becomes a symbol and you can't get over it
No replies yet... 13 June 2012: When Your Ex Becomes A Symbol Relationship Symbolism of Why You Are Still Hooked By Frank Kermit, Relationships We are surrounded by the power of symbols. A symbol is more than just a design we recognize; symbols are a means of making meaning. ...
Ally Vs Enemy: Understanding The Emotional Needs of Men
No replies yet... 9 June 2012: Is She His Ally or His Enemy? Understanding The Emotional Needs of Men By Frank Kermit, Relationships The best way I know how to teach people about the emotional needs of men is to break it down to absolute fundamentals. If people can und...
Dating After A Break Up - Just How Long Should You Wait?
This question has 2 answers by readers of DearCupid.ORG.
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1 June 2012: Dating After Breaking Up? The Sooner The Better By Frank Kermit, Relationships “How much time should I wait before I start dating again?” is a common question that I get asked from someone that has just recently gotten dumped, and still sufferi...
Relationship Redemption: How To Forgive Yourself and Get Closure
This question has 2 answers by readers of DearCupid.ORG.
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23 May 2012: Relationship Redemption How To Forgive Yourself and Get Closure By Frank Kermit, Relationships We all make mistakes in life. If you have ever tried to get into a relationship, are in a relationship, or are recovering from a relationship, ...
Finding The Meaning Of Your Life And Relationships
No replies yet... 15 May 2012: The Meaning of your Relationships Starts With The Meaning Of Your Life By Frank Kermit, Relationships Contemplate your death. No seriously. In order to make meanings of your relationships past, present and those you will have in the futur...
The Mother-Lover Theory Understanding The Emotional Needs of Women
This question has 4 answers by readers of DearCupid.ORG.
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10 May 2012: The Mother-Lover Theory Understanding The Emotional Needs of Women By Frank Kermit, Relationships A woman can only play one of two roles in a man’s life. She is either his mother or his lover. She cannot be both. When a man addresses a wom...
Moving To The Next Level: Understanding The Hierarchy of Relationships
This question has 3 answers by readers of DearCupid.ORG.
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1 May 2012: Moving To The Next Level Understanding The Hierarchy of Relationships By Frank Kermit, Relationships One of the biggest mistakes people make in relationships is to promote someone up the hierarchy of commitment that has not really earned it. I...
Beware Your Friends when it comes to love
No replies yet... 15 April 2012: Beware Your Friends They May Not Want You To Be Loved By Frank Kermit, Relationships Mistakes Singles Make # 6… Seeking the approval of friends that influences your love life choices. Love may come and go, but a friendship can last a lifetim...
Are Relationships Worth The Risk?
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8 April 2012: Relationships = Risk But is it really worth it? By Frank Kermit, Relationships Given that there is so much risk in getting involved in relationships, or having sex for that matter, is it at all worth it to even bother? After all, a broken hear...
Tattoos and Relationships
This question has 4 answers by readers of DearCupid.ORG.
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24 March 2012: Beware The L-I-N-K Of (L)ove and (INK) By Frank Kermit, Relationships While at a coffee shop a few weeks ago, I met a tattoo artist. He had his son’s name tattooed on his hand, and being the ever-inquisitive one, I asked him about his profession...
Open Relationships and Infidelity
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17 March 2012: Open Relationships Do Not Always Stave Off Infidelity By Frank Kermit, Relationships Some people believe that one of the surest ways to guarantee fidelity is to only do open relationships. The premise is that people only cheat in monogamous ...
What is a Relationship?
No replies yet... 10 March 2012: What is a Relationship? Is best defined by what it’s NOT By Frank Kermit, Relationships Over the years, I have been asked a number of times “What is a Relationship?” This is a harder question to answer than most people think. In my experience,...
Engaged! Now what?
No replies yet... 19 February 2012: Pre Marital Disclosure What you don’t know, you must know By Frank Kermit, Relationships Valentines day has come and gone. Some relationships have started. Some relationships have ended, and some relationships have proceeded to the next le...
Making Monogamy Work
This question has 2 answers by readers of DearCupid.ORG.
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5 February 2012: Making Monogamy Work By Frank Kermit, Relationships Monogamy is easier than open relationships, because the rules are simpler...but the application of the rules of monogamy is not as easy. Monogamy works for monogamous people...however...
Single Parent Dating, Not Just a Single Issue
This question has 1 answer by a reader of DearCupid.ORG.
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3 February 2012: Single Parent Dating – More Than Just A Single Issue By Frank Kermit At least 40% of marriages end in divorce. Depending on the study you read, the percentage can be higher. Even though the break down of families continues, the drive that ma...
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What are the qualities a guy looks for in a girl to be his life partner?
Q. what are the qualities a guy looks for in a girl to be his life partner.....?...
A. 24 March 2010: 1.Protect his reputation
2. Quiet time for him to recharge, relax, regenerate
3. Can you mind the store while he is incapacitated
4. Compliance with his wishes without blind obedience
5. Nurture his investments, environment and lifestyle
6. Be... (read in full...)
I'm woried that anal sex on my bf might turn him gay!
Q. I am a young lady thats enjoys anal sex every once and a while. I also like to perform anal sex on my guy( it turns me on in a weird and powerful way). However,it seems that he really enjoys it now. B4 he did for my benifit.I used to have to begg ...
A. 23 March 2010: Enjoying anal stimulation does not equal being gay.
However, I think what might be really bothering you is that he is regularly taking on the vulnerable submissive position in sex. Once in a while is was an exciting change...however, now you migh... (read in full...)
Paternity testing.
Q. Is it possible for a child to resemble his/her potential father and the paternity test results come out to be negative?...
A. 21 March 2010: It all depends who the real father of the baby is. If he is a person that resembles the potential father, then of course.
-Frank... (read in full...)
Am I being bullied?
Q. There is a man at work who may be bullying me. At first he was really nice and charming and went out of his way to make me feel special. He knows that I am in a relationship but he spent a lot of time telling me I was nice / attractive. Then I ma...
A. 21 March 2010: Go to human resources and ask to be given a copy of the written policies on harassment in the workplace. Just tell them that you want to understand what the policy is. At the very least, if you have to escalate this, your pre-visit to the office ... (read in full...)
Should I go and meet a guy from the past when I'm married?
Q. Recently and old "friend" has contacted me through facebook. We have not seen each other in 21 years. And we had sexual relations at the time. I feel that everything happens for a reason. And I think that we are developing some feelings for one ...
A. 21 March 2010: No.
He is not your friend, he is your former lover.
He is not the solution to your marriage, nor to any other missing piece of your life.
Take the energy you are putting into him, and put that energy into fixing your marriage. If your marri... (read in full...)
Guys: can you shed some light on the dating game?
Q. I took a break from dating a few months ago, but after joining a social site we had an event and I met one of the men who was also on the site. We were the first to arrive, so we had about an hour or two to chat. He was engaging and I instantly ...
A. 21 March 2010: You said:
...and another guy was chatting me up, he was very territorial and made it known to the guy that he had "dibs" already. I was shocked and a bit flattered.
This was the first error. Instead of being flattered, this was a red flag. H... (read in full...)
My girlfriend cheated on me with another girl, now I'm concerned about it happening again
Q. My fiancee and I have been together for about 4 years with a few breakups in the first couple. One of the problems early on was that she cheated on me. She is bi and she cheated with a girl. After a long time of soul searching and working things out ...
A. 19 March 2010: She is bisexual. She is attracted to a gender for which you are not, in addition to her attraction to you.
I think you need to restructure your relationship with her, so that instead of trying to force her to give up something that she was like... (read in full...)
Sister came on to me...drunk. What should I say to her?
Q. She'd been to a party and came home really drunk and she grabbed me and started kissing me. She then said I was her baby brother and that she should show me how to fun with a girl. She then tried to pull my shirt off and I had to wrestle with her to ...
A. 19 March 2010: I do not accept the idea that she needs to be forgiven because she was drunk.
If she is responsible enough to drink at all, she is responsible for her actions when she is drunk.
Like I said, if the genders were reversed, and it was a drunk brot... (read in full...)
Sister came on to me...drunk. What should I say to her?
Q. She'd been to a party and came home really drunk and she grabbed me and started kissing me. She then said I was her baby brother and that she should show me how to fun with a girl. She then tried to pull my shirt off and I had to wrestle with her to ...
A. 19 March 2010: I wonder what advice people would give if they reversed the genders in the story...this was a sexual assault, but no one sees it until the genders are reversed.
I think you need to set some boundaries.
You do need to tell your sister that you ... (read in full...)
My boyfriend wants nothing to do with me because I kissed his mate.
Q. Hi, i have been in a relationship for nearly two years now and even though im only young know he is the one for me. I am totally in love with him and no one else could make me happier. Recently, i went out to a club and had far too much to drink and ...
A. 17 March 2010: What can you do?
Learn from this.
Give up alcohol so that you never ruin your next great relationship with your drunkenness.
-Frank... (read in full...)
I have this feeling that change is in the air...has anyone else had this before?
Q. Hi All, I have a rather strange Dear Cupid!! I have had a feeling for the last few months that a huge change is in the air in my life and is heading in my direction. I'm not sure what it is, and even my Mum said she can feel it, and she is one of ...
A. 17 March 2010: Yes I have.
I took it as a sign from the universe (I know this sounds strange but bare with me) to do all those things that I have been intending to do, but never get around to.
For example, things like learning to change a flat tire, learn... (read in full...)
Loose? Or control issues?
Q. Ok...I have visited this site on several occassions with the same dilemma...my boyfriend complains about sex with me. He says that my vagina and anus are loose and I do not feel the same way I did when he met me one year ago. The anus I can ...
A. 17 March 2010: Read the book
Emotional Blackmail by Susan Forward PhD
Your bf is a classic Emotional Abuser...RUN
before he starts with the physical abuse.
Why you would even consider trying to change yourself instead of dumping him is what you really n... (read in full...)
She keeps nude pictures of her ex lovers!
Q. My spouse keeps pictures of her ex-lovers (even nude ones) and still talks to them. When asked why, she says that they are now only friends. I have mentioned that obviously she doesn't have a closure with these relationships and lives in her ...
A. 15 March 2010: Keeping the nude pics is a good thing. I see it as an insurance policy in case any of them try to blackmail her...she has this "insurance". My guess is that they surely have nude pics of her, if not videos. I doubt she'd be the only one to have ... (read in full...)
Rules for a MMF threesome?
Q. Hypothetically speaking what would your rules of engagement for a MMF threesome be? I know the risks as we have discussed them. We have a strong line of communication and respect for each other and know that this is strictly for fun. With that...
A. 15 March 2010: 1-Go to a swinger club and get to know people there that have experienced it, and see if you can get referrals. Do not have sex there the first few times you visit. That is the best place to meet people for this sort of thing.
2-If you have nev... (read in full...)
Why would a married man want a child with his children when he already has 5 with his wife?
Q. i have been "seeing" (as i dont consider it dating)a married man for a while now.i live in jamaica and he lives in the england, i see him up to 4 times per year and even tho he is married we talk a lot on the phone when he is home.i go to school at ...
A. 14 March 2010: He wants a kid with you for two reasons...
1-his ego
2-he wants you to be forced to be attached to him
That's my guess anyways...I assume that you are the "other woman" and that he and is wife are not in an honest open relationship?
One... (read in full...)
After a 6 month relationship, I found out he has a live in girlfriend. Is he playing me or does he really love me?
Q. I met my boyfriednd over a year ago. We are both divorced with kids. We slowly started dating. After a half a year relationship he announced to me that he has a live-in girlfriend (we live in different cities)for 2 years!he told me that he wants to ...
A. 14 March 2010: He is playing with you.
When a man wants to leave a woman, he will leave her whether or not another woman is in the picture.
If he has not left her yet, he is not planning to and his stories about her are as full of lies, and the lies he tell... (read in full...)
Who is the father?
Q. My lmp was on nov 10, 2009. I had an affair on nov 19,2009. Used a condom. first ultrasound On jan 17 i was 7 weeks. Second ultrasound on feb 24 i was 13 weeks. Do you think the other guy is the father???...
A. 12 March 2010: Have you told your non-affair guy that it might not be his? I am sure he'd like to know too.
-Frank... (read in full...)
Horrible love triangle and I just don't know who to choose!
Q. Hello Everyone, I desperately need some help Ok so here it goes, I have two guys who I love and both love me back. I do not know what to do. It all began about 5 yrs ago. I married my high school sweetheart (#1). I thought it would be forever...
A. 11 March 2010: If you are still legally married to your husband, you have an obligation to work things out so stay with him.
If you are divorced from your husband, and the things that split you two up to begin with are still there, then do not go back and be a... (read in full...)
Is it wrong to get advice about my marriage from a man I am attracted to?
Q. My husband and I haven't been seeing eye to eye on things recently,which causes us to fuss heatedly. I recently met a man who I can talk to and vent with. We are attracted to each other. Is it wrong to Get his advice?...
A. 10 March 2010: If you are in an open relationship, then go ahead and get his advice, and yes it is going to lead to sex. He is not listening to your problems because it is his job. He'd like to do you as much as you want him.
If you are in a monogamous relation... (read in full...)
She slept with her ex 4 months ago... need advice please!
Q. Hi, first time poster... in desperate need of some advice. This time yesterday i was the happiest and most content i'd ever been with anyone, i truly believed i'd found that special person, to me she was perfect in every way. Today i'm stru...
A. 10 March 2010: The promise is meaningless if you do not trust her.
You are doing the right thing here...taking time for yourself to process the emotions, and looking at WHY it happened.
You learned an important lesson about monogamy, which is to voice your co... (read in full...)
I forgave my wife for the affair, ironically it actually turned me on! Anyone else ever felt this way?
Q. My wife had an affair with her boss from 1984 to 1988. she told me about. it hurt bad, I could not eat or sleep for days. we went for help but i wanted more sex than before. it would turn me on, thinking about what she told me. she told how much he ...
A. 9 March 2010: Yes. You will find the answer to this in the book Sperm Wars. The idea is that sexual jealousy, when re-channeled can make the male orgasm more pleasurable.
Basically, the premise is...
...when a man feels that his female mate might be, o... (read in full...)
Separated married man want me to move in with him.
Q. Alright, I need a little help here. I've been dating this amazing guy for six months. We have discussed moving in together after my lease is up. I have another few months before I have to give notice as to not renewing and another couple after ...
A. 9 March 2010: Consider this...
his wife owns half of whatever he has in his name. It is her right, title and interest.
If he moves in with you, and he is still legally married, she owns half of anything of his share of the things the two of you invest in.
... (read in full...)
How do I stop thinking about my best friend's boyfriend???
Q. i recently had sex with my best friend's boyfriend, they have been together for 10 years and have 3 children, we bumped into each other on a night out and a few friends came back to my house, everyone went around 5am and her boyfriend stayed to ...
A. 9 March 2010: Well, you obvious do not consider her "enough" of a friend. I doubt you will stop thinking about him anytime soon since you do not have your own boyfriend, so the only answer is to stay away from him and her from this point on.
All that being sa... (read in full...)
Separated married man want me to move in with him.
Q. Alright, I need a little help here. I've been dating this amazing guy for six months. We have discussed moving in together after my lease is up. I have another few months before I have to give notice as to not renewing and another couple after ...
A. 9 March 2010: He is separated...not divorced.
Until he is divorced, you are NOT in a position to be making any sort of decision that will make you liable in any way for his financial issues.
Plan your next living decision (extend your lease, or move into ano... (read in full...)
What should I do about my wife?
Q. I am planning to leave my wife, but I am really scared of her - not that she is gonna beat me up or anything. The other day we were having a argument and she punched me - I was too shocked, even so she has hit me before. And she blames me for "m...
A. 8 March 2010: All the "good" you did for her might be meaningless. See a family lawyer right away BEFORE you leave. You need EVIDENCE. A lawyer will explain to you what you need for evidence of her abusing you.
Just to give you an idea. In parts of the USA ... (read in full...)
Torn between two brothers ...
Q. Before anyone judges me please understand my reasons for what i have done. Ive been with my boyfriend for 4 years, and the past 6 months, i've been sleeping with his younger brother who is the same age as me, 21. A little over a year ago i found...
A. 8 March 2010: I think you are in love with the drama of the situation more than you care about either of these two guys.
My advice is to stop seeing both men, and focus on your own education and future.
-Frank... (read in full...)
My ex girlfriend is pregnant. She wants me to get rid of my current girlfriend. Am I selfish to say no?
Q. I have just found out my ex girlfirend is 5 months pregnant, she has just found out also she had no idea. Ive always stayed in contact with her and tried to help her. now i want to be there for the child, but i dont know if im ready for a child ...
A. 7 March 2010: Are you sure it is yours?
Acting like it is, might make you liable, even if it is not.
See a family lawyer before you do anything.
-Frank... (read in full...)
Should I be in this relationship when I can't stand to be touched
Q. About 4.5 years ago i was seriously hurt by a crazy ex. Sex was abuse, and it was cruel, and as soon as i could escape i did. I moved to a different city, sacrificed my friends, my job, my life and developed an eating disorder. My way of handling ...
A. 7 March 2010: Yes you may need professional help...otherwise you would have dealt with it by now.
Yes you need to end the relationship you are in. I assume your boyfriend knows the reasons you reject him, if not, you had better explain it to him. The emotiona... (read in full...)
I think I had unrealistic expectations of what a relationship should be
Q. I'm currently in a relationship with a girl (I'm 17 and shes 16, I'm a junior she's a sophomore)l that I do really like but lately things just haven't been working out. I think I may have found the exact reason why... This is actually my firs...
A. 7 March 2010: You are 17, your profile says you are 22-25.... (read in full...)
We are interested in having a three-some. Any suggestions on finding the girl for it?
Q. Me and my boyfriend have been in a relationship for a very long time and are hence looking forward to spicing it up... he has suggested a 3-some. the problem is finding the 3rd person (a girl obviously) for it. any suggestions......
A. 3 March 2010: First, see if there are any swingers clubs in your area, as they would be the safest place to meet potential partners.
Next, if you are considering asking a friend of yours, I would suggest against it, as you do not know how your friend will rea... (read in full...)
I love my boyfriend, but I want to experience other relationships. What should I do?
Q. I'm 22 years old. My boyfriend and I have been together for a nearly 2 years. We'll call him 'Steve'. I do love him, and I enjoy being with him. My problem is that lately I've been feeling like I want to experience other relationships. S...
A. 3 March 2010: Well, there are three choices as I see it.
1-Put all the energy you have into working on your relationship with Steve, and finds ways to Making Monogamy Work. For example, I am the author of a program entitled The Rules for the First 10 Times yo... (read in full...)
Can a guy man have gay friends? Is it the same as a married man being friends with a single woman?
Q. I am gay and have a boyfriend and he thinks a gay man in a relationship shouldn't have gay friends. To me that shouts insecurity but from his perspective it is a genuine moral standard. Neither of us had gay friends so it never even came up. I ...
A. 2 March 2010: By the sounds of it, you are in a monogamous relationship.
The first rule of monogamy is that you only have sex with one person. The second rule of monogamy is that you never do anything that would potentially threaten the first rule.
Your pa... (read in full...)
I found another man's underwear under the bed!
Q. I just found men's underwear under my side of the bed. I'd like advice on what to do. This weekend, I was searching for a pair of old sneakers and they were shoved way under our bed on my side. I have no clue how long they've been there, I usually...
A. 1 March 2010: For now, act like you did not find them. Do not put them back though. Put it in a plastic bag, seal it, and put it in a safe place in case you need to use it as evidence in the future.
First decide what you are going to do if you do find out... (read in full...)
Should I protect other women from him?
Q. I let my self get used, played, hurt by this man. This man picks women that have sworn off men for years and gets them to fall for him. He has a way to make you want to believe him. When you show any distrust he'll tell you its because of the way ...
A. 28 February 2010: Be mindful of the law, as some of the things you are doing could be considered defamation and stalking. Is he really a prick, or are you just a woman scorned or both? Even if you are totally right, continuing to attack him after the end of your ... (read in full...)
Can you move from the 'friends ladder' back to the 'good ladder' if its an ex?
Q. Alright, I just saw the question asked by another member, and I want to take it one step further, and then maybe even a step further then that, Someone on here told me about the Ladder Theory, which I think is brilliant, my question, lets say you've ...
A. 28 February 2010: Yes it is possible...the fact that she is your ex makes it easier (assuming you already had sex with her). If you did not have sex with each other, then it will be harder.
The key is to show CHANGE. It is the same formula used to turn go From Fri... (read in full...)
I have two men in my life, how do I choose which one?
Q. I am a 30 year old attractive and smart female. I was a former Ford model in teens and early 20’s, and after graduating college, I am currently a VP in pharmaceutical sales. How do I choose? Here’s some background on the men. Guy #1--We’ve ...
A. 28 February 2010: The point of making ANY relationship work is to put WORK into the relationship you already have...and that includes when temptation strikes.
You could be in the BEST relationship of your life, and you will ALWAYS be tempted by another. The poin... (read in full...)
How do we deal with an unlabelled relationship?
Q. Although we aren't "dating", my friend and I are definitely exclusive. We trust each other and care about each other. We never established a label on the relationship, so calling each other boyfriend and girlfriend all of a sudden is a bit strange ...
A. 28 February 2010: If it is unlabeled, then I have to question what trust you are referring to.
If you are trusting him to be monogamous to you, or faithful, I would highly doubt that...you can not be faithful nor monogamously exclusive to a relationship that ref... (read in full...)
I want to move out of the friend zone and into being boyfriend material
Q. Hey every one, ive got two quite big problems that have been bothering me for a while.. i go to a college in london right.. im 18, and (not being big headed) im a good looking guy.. well lots of girls like me.. im REALLY friendly.. sometimes TOO...
A. 27 February 2010: You are sooooo friendly, it is Unsexy.
Basically, you are addressing certain women's emotional needs too much, and failing at others.
I have lots of experience being "just a friend" and eventually learning to turn Friends into Lovers. It took ... (read in full...)
My ex is threatening me with "truth" tablets, do they exist?
Q. Ok everyone Im still in contact with my ex. The thing is my brother done something not horrible to him and my ex thinks im involved in some sor of way The other day he said something o me over the phone about hes ordered somehing on lin...
A. 27 February 2010: You are more worried about the tablets, and not focusing enough on the fact that your ex just threaten you with
VIOLENCE.
Slipping something into your drink, against your consent, is something that abusers and rapists do.
Stay the fuck a... (read in full...)
I think a friend has nude picture of my wife!
Q. How do I go about asking a friend if he has nude pictures of my wife? I have reason to believe he does, as he alluded to it once years ago. They would have been made years ago when she was younger by an old boyfriend {not the guy with the pictures). ...
A. 27 February 2010: Talk to your wife about them. If they exist, she likely knows about them unless they were taken without her consent.
Just because she did not tell you does not mean she does not know. She might have felt that you would not be able to handle t... (read in full...)
Am I doing the wrong thing trying to change sexualities?
Q. I am really confused. I left my husband 3 months ago because he was abusing me...he was hitting me.....anyways right after that i spent a very short time with a loser who only wanted to use me for sex and obviously that didn't work out either.....so ...
A. 26 February 2010: I think the right thing for you to do is spend time with yourself and get to know you.
It seems to be that you are using relationships as a means of escapism. I suggest that you focus on your relationship with yourself and figure out what att... (read in full...)
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