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Frank Kermit, MA is an Expert Relationship and Dating Coach. He is a Best Selling Author, educator, and regular media correspondent.

He teaches men and women about their emotional needs, how to address each others emotional needs, to be applied to ongoing loving relationships. In 2011, Frank completed an Advanced Certificate in Trauma Counseling and in 2014 completed a certificate in Hypnotherapy.

Frank Kermit has a newsletters that the public can sign up for:

http://www.franktalks.com/newsletter/ (upcoming media spots)

and when you sign up, you get a 400+ page ebook for free (a collection of 100 of Frank's best articles)

Frank answers public questions on dearcupid.org when and IF he has the time. Please understand that Frank makes a professional living through his Date Coaching, and therefore his private paying clients must come first. Frank does not answer private questions received on dearcupid.org unless you want to hire him for some private one on one coaching via skype or over the phone. You can learn more about Frank's Coaching services at www.franktalks.com/

Latest articles:

Off Limits Dating

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18 September 2013: Is Someone Off Limits for Dating? By Frank Kermit ND, Relationships Mastering the art of dating requires a number of skills such as being socially calibrated, effective communication and knowing what you want. One of the areas that comes up for ...

How to Deal with a Toxic Person

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18 September 2013: The Best Way To Deal With Toxic People By Frank Kermit ND, Relationships Toxic people are defined in this article as people who lack the capacity to reason, or people have the capacity to reason but just do not want to reason with you. In t...

A Broken Engagement is Better Than A Happy Divorce

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31 August 2013: A Broken Engagement is Better Than A Happy Divorce By Frank Kermit ND, Relationships One of the ironies of couples counseling that I often find myself doing is taking the couple through the pre-marital coaching process when they may already be...

A Frank Comment on Miley Cyrus

This question has 6 answers by readers of DearCupid.ORG.
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31 August 2013: A Frank Comment On Miley Cyrus By Frank Kermit ND, Relationships I do not normally comment on the antics of popular culture, as so much of what we see of movies and TV are fiction based romances and relationships. I tried my best to stay fo...

The Wedding Speech

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26 July 2013: The Wedding Speech Remember this day, your wedding day. Not for the dresses and suits, not for the extravagance, nor the dinner and dancing, but remember your wedding day because of the reasons you chose to marry your spouse. Remember who is it that...

Sexually Incompatible Couples

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19 July 2013: Sexually Incompatible Couples Sex is not the most important thing in a relationship. However, couples who love each other dearly and connect on so many levels, but whom are sexually incompatible tend to find that sex can be at the core of a numb...

Separation and Dating, Part 2 of 2

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28 June 2013: Separation and Dating, Part 2 of 2 Separation does not automatically lead to divorce unless you let it. It is up to you and your partner to put in the work so that it does not happen. In the event you are the only one trying to work on yourself and ...

Separation and Dating Part 1 of 2

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22 June 2013: Separation and Dating Part 1 of 2 One of the most damaging actions an individual can take is to start dating someone new when going through a separation with their serious long term partner (spouse, common-law partner or a defacto-union). When I use ...

The Frank Break Up Formula

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14 June 2013: The Frank Break Up Formula By Frank Kermit ND, Relationships Breaking up with someone is rarely an enjoyable or pleasant experience. In fact, there are those individuals who stay in less than satisfying relationships, and even can go all the ...

The Frank Romance Formula part 3 of 3

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8 June 2013: The Frank Romance Formula Part 3 By Frank Kermit ND, Relationships Continued from last article: The Frank Romance Formula is: A. (Stimulation of the 5 senses) + B. (Addressing the emotional needs of that person) + C. (Sensual/Sexual Contex...

The Frank Romance Formula Part 2 of 3

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3 June 2013: The Frank Romance Formula Part 2 By Frank Kermit ND, Relationships Continued from last article: The Frank Romance Formula is: A. (Stimulation of the 5 senses) + B. (Addressing the emotional needs of that person) + C. (Sensual/Sexual Contex...

The Secret Of Seduction is that it Happens in the Future

This question has 2 answers by readers of DearCupid.ORG.
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3 May 2013: The Secret Of Seduction is that it Happens in the Future By Frank Kermit ND, Relationships The future is where actual seduction takes place. That is the key to seduction. It has very little to do with turning someone on when you see them. I...

The S.L.A.P. Theory Of Life Lessons

This question has 1 answer by a reader of DearCupid.ORG.
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27 April 2013: The S.L.A.P. Theory Of Life Lessons By Frank Kermit ND, Relationships Sometimes life will slap you down when it has a lesson to teach you. For some people, the slap may be a light swat, and for others the slap has to be a severe smack down. ...

Dating With Disabilities

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5 April 2013: Dating With Disabilities by Frank Kermit ND, Relationships I once went on a date with a woman that had severe food allergies. We went out to a movie and I wished she had told me ahead of time. Although she mentioned that she was deathly all...

Rejection: The Worst Best Thing That Can Ever Happen

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21 March 2013: Rejection: The Worst Best Thing That Can Ever Happen By Frank Kermit ND, Relationships Rejection is the worst best thing that can ever happen to you. Managing rejection is a necessary part in managing your love life. Over the course of your ...

Things they do not tell you about having kids

This question has 2 answers by readers of DearCupid.ORG.
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15 March 2013: Things They Do Not Tell You About Having Kids By Frank Kermit ND, Relationships I always try to be very practical and realistic in my articles. This can come across very negative, given that my topic is Relationships (and all things relative...

When Friendship Is Meaningless

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8 March 2013: Friendship Is Meaningless Stop Hanging Out With Friends Who Sexually Reject You By Frank Kermit ND, Relationships Friendship is meaningless. There I said it. Now before you shoot one of your nasty emails to the editor, actually read this colum...

Who Cares What People Think? Depends...

This question has 1 answer by a reader of DearCupid.ORG.
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1 March 2013: How Much Should You Care About What Other People Think? By Frank Kermit ND, Relationships T here will be times when we want to do something in our lives that is meaningful to us. It could be a decision related to abandoning education, wh...

Learn How to Choose the Right Fights!

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21 February 2013: Pick And Choose Your Fights By Frank Kermit ND, Relationships Fighting in relationships is normal. The issue is not whether you fight. The issue is HOW a couple fights. Do they talk out their disagreements? Do they wait until they are alon...

Starting Over After V-day?

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14 February 2013: Starting Over? By Frank Kermit ND, Relationships Valentine’s day can be a day of reckoning for some people. Meaning, the events leading up to, on the day of, and afterwards can really wreck your life. This is one of the reasons I often refer to...

A Relationship is: Acceptance at the Worst, Loving at the Best

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6 February 2013: A Relationship is: Acceptance at the Worst, Loving at the Best By Frank Kermit, Relationships At my weekly relationship workshop last Saturday I issued one of my famous “Frankisms” that seemed to really resonate with the attendees. I was trying...

Asking Hard Questions

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1 February 2013: Asking Hard Questions By Frank Kermit ND, Relationships When trying to decide if you should be committed to someone, moving in with someone, getting engaged, and getting married, each new transition brings about the unpleasant task of askin...

Ex Lovers and Weddings Do Not Mix

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24 January 2013: Ex Lovers and Weddings Do Not Mix By Frank Kermit, Relationships If you ever had sex with someone that is about to get married, and have been invited to the wedding, do not go. This is especially true if the spouse-to-be feels uncomfortable havi...

Couples in Transition: Monogamy and Non-monogamy

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16 January 2013: Couples in Transition: Monogamy and Non-monogamy By Frank Kermit ND, Relationships Couples who are experiencing a transition in the status of their relationship may sometimes look to explore new ways of redefining their sex lives b...

Common Sense For Common Scents By Frank Kermit, Relationships

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13 December 2012: Common Sense For Common Scents By Frank Kermit, Relationships As the holiday season approaches, invitations begin to swarm in for get-togethers from family, friends and even office parties. It is a time of people coming together, and in some ca...

Couples in Transition

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29 November 2012: Couples in Transition By Frank Kermit, Relationships When a couple is going through a change in the status of their relationship they are a couple in transition. This includes couples that are transitioning from monogamy to non-monogamy, from no...

Your Home Is Your Seduction

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15 November 2012: Your Home Is Your Seduction By Frank Kermit, Relationships Your date is coming over to your place! You have seen each other a couple of times already, but this is different. This is YOUR PLACE, not some coffee shop or movie theatre or restaur...

The Movie Of Your Life’s Journey

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6 November 2012: The Movie Of Your Life’s Journey By Frank Kermit, Relationships The movie of your life is how we each envision our lives unfolding throughout our life span. This concept goes beyond simple fantasizing of what your life would be like. Writing ...

What Love Masks by Frank Kermit

This question has 7 answers by readers of DearCupid.ORG.
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2 November 2012: What Love Masks By Frank Kermit, Relationships A mentor of mine taught me that love is not blind; it is just that categories are rigid. When you meet someone, you put that person in a category (lover, friend, temptation, fling, does-no...

The Chocolate Made It Too Much Work: An Article About EFT and Weight Loss

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2 November 2012: The Chocolate Made It Too Much Work An Article About EFT and Weight Loss I have a confession. I used to daydream about food. You know that point in the day when someone catches you; your head in your hands, that dreamy look on your face? If so...

Have You Tried NOT Dating Your Type?

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1 November 2012: Have You Tried NOT Dating Your Type? By Frank Kermit, Relationships We all have our “type”. By “type” I am referring to that type of person each of us is madly attracted too. Each of us has our preference of what we like, what turns us on, ...

Is there such a thing as Happily Single?

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19 October 2012: Is there such a thing as Happily Single? By Frank Kermit, Relationships Is being single really that bad? After all, when a person considers the amount of pain that a relationship or casual dating can cause, it may seem that just skipping the w...

Be Thankful For a Broken Heart

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11 October 2012: Be Thankful For A Broken Heart By Frank Kermit, Relationships Ok, I hate this. I really hate this part of the process. However, it is a necessary part of the process, and if I am expected to help encourage others to do it, first I have to demo...

Stop Talking About Your Ex On Dates!

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5 October 2012: Stop Talking So Much About Your Ex By Frank Kermit, Relationships So you are on a date with someone new. You are excited. You are nervous. You hope that this is finally going to be the one. You meet. So far, you both like what you see. This...

Dating in Social Circles

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29 September 2012: Dating In Social Circles By Frank Kermit, Relationships Dating can be tricky. Does the other person like you the way you think he or she might? Do you really like that person enough to get more serious, or do you want to keep it more casual a...

Frank Guide to Speed Dating

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21 September 2012: Frank Guide To Speed Dating By Frank Kermit, Relationships Every way to meet someone new is a good way. Though friends, through the Internet, blind dates, approaching someone you want to meet, at a workshop, matchmaking companies, business conv...

Relationship Goal Setting

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15 September 2012: Relationship Goal Setting By Frank Kermit, Relationships Setting goals in most areas of your life can be challenging. When it comes to relationships, there are even more challenges. Whereas in other areas of your life such as education, emplo...

Battling The Savior Complex in Relationships

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6 September 2012: Battling The Savior Complex By Frank Kermit, Relationships As children, many of us grew up on stories about the hero that saves a person, and in the process, earned the undying love and loyalty of the person saved so that the hero and that saved ...

Get Out Of Your Own Way!

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30 August 2012: Get Out Of Your Own Way By Frank Kermit, Relationships One of the biggest obstacles that a person can have as an obstruction on their path of finding happiness, peace and healing for their love life, is themselves. Although most people wou...

Your Choices Today Become The Past You Have To Share Tomorrow

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26 August 2012: Your Choices Today Become The Past You Have To Share Tomorrow By Frank Kermit, Relationships Young adults tend to discount how the choices they make today will impact their futures tomorrow. At least, when it comes to relationships. The bes...

Are You A Partner Or A Liability?

This question has 1 answer by a reader of DearCupid.ORG.
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17 August 2012: Are You A Partner Or A Liability? When it really is you and not them By Frank Kermit, Relationships “It’s not you, it’s me.” Have you ever heard that said to you when someone broke up with you? Have you ever been the one to use it when dump...

The 7 Weird Words That Help Define Relationships

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9 August 2012: The 7 Weird Words That Help Define Relationships By Frank Kermit, Relationships There are 7 certain words that catch many people off guard when it comes to relationships. They are: Lust, Love, Sex, Dating, Commitment, Marriage, and Monogamy. ...

Fear of Conflict Is Rooted in The Fear Of Loss.

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20 July 2012: Fear of Conflict Is Rooted in The Fear Of Loss By Frank Kermit, Relationships Are you too nice when it comes to relationships? Do you walk on eggshells because you do not want to upset your partner? Are you reluctant to enforce your bounda...

Re-Establishing Trust in a Relationship Article

This question has 2 answers by readers of DearCupid.ORG.
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12 July 2012: Broken Trust Takes More Than Time To Re-Establish By Frank Kermit, Relationships Trust is one of the most important components of a relationship. Love is a great start, but it takes more than loving someone, or being loved by someone, to make ...

Understanding Emotional Needs

This question has 2 answers by readers of DearCupid.ORG.
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4 July 2012: Understanding Emotional Needs: What We Respond To Versus What We Should Like By Frank Kermit, Relationships Emotional needs are about what a person responds to. It has nothing to do with what a person should like. We all should be attracte...

Red Flags: What To Watch Out For On A Date

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29 June 2012: Red Flags: What To Watch Out For On A Date By Frank Kermit, Relationships When you are on a date, and the person you are getting to know says or does something that triggers a well-honed instinct that you need to stop dating that person, you hav...

The Art of Storytelling on a Date

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25 June 2012: Art of Storytelling: Make or Break A Relationship Happy Ending By Frank Kermit, Relationships One of the challenges that people face when they go on dates is that they may not factor in that others will not understand what they are trying ...

Swinger Beginner Advice

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25 June 2012: Swinger Beginners: Keep it Out of the Work Place By Frank Kermit, Relationships Dear Frank, My husband and I recently returned from a business trip/vacation where a few of my husband's co-workers also brought their wives. We really hit it o...

When your Ex becomes a symbol and you can't get over it

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13 June 2012: When Your Ex Becomes A Symbol Relationship Symbolism of Why You Are Still Hooked By Frank Kermit, Relationships We are surrounded by the power of symbols. A symbol is more than just a design we recognize; symbols are a means of making meaning. ...

Ally Vs Enemy: Understanding The Emotional Needs of Men

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9 June 2012: Is She His Ally or His Enemy? Understanding The Emotional Needs of Men By Frank Kermit, Relationships The best way I know how to teach people about the emotional needs of men is to break it down to absolute fundamentals. If people can und...

Dating After A Break Up - Just How Long Should You Wait?

This question has 2 answers by readers of DearCupid.ORG.
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1 June 2012: Dating After Breaking Up? The Sooner The Better By Frank Kermit, Relationships “How much time should I wait before I start dating again?” is a common question that I get asked from someone that has just recently gotten dumped, and still sufferi...

Relationship Redemption: How To Forgive Yourself and Get Closure

This question has 2 answers by readers of DearCupid.ORG.
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23 May 2012: Relationship Redemption How To Forgive Yourself and Get Closure By Frank Kermit, Relationships We all make mistakes in life. If you have ever tried to get into a relationship, are in a relationship, or are recovering from a relationship, ...

Finding The Meaning Of Your Life And Relationships

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15 May 2012: The Meaning of your Relationships Starts With The Meaning Of Your Life By Frank Kermit, Relationships Contemplate your death. No seriously. In order to make meanings of your relationships past, present and those you will have in the futur...

The Mother-Lover Theory Understanding The Emotional Needs of Women

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10 May 2012: The Mother-Lover Theory Understanding The Emotional Needs of Women By Frank Kermit, Relationships A woman can only play one of two roles in a man’s life. She is either his mother or his lover. She cannot be both. When a man addresses a wom...

Moving To The Next Level: Understanding The Hierarchy of Relationships

This question has 3 answers by readers of DearCupid.ORG.
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1 May 2012: Moving To The Next Level Understanding The Hierarchy of Relationships By Frank Kermit, Relationships One of the biggest mistakes people make in relationships is to promote someone up the hierarchy of commitment that has not really earned it. I...

Beware Your Friends when it comes to love

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15 April 2012: Beware Your Friends They May Not Want You To Be Loved By Frank Kermit, Relationships Mistakes Singles Make # 6… Seeking the approval of friends that influences your love life choices. Love may come and go, but a friendship can last a lifetim...

Are Relationships Worth The Risk?

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8 April 2012: Relationships = Risk But is it really worth it? By Frank Kermit, Relationships Given that there is so much risk in getting involved in relationships, or having sex for that matter, is it at all worth it to even bother? After all, a broken hear...

Tattoos and Relationships

This question has 4 answers by readers of DearCupid.ORG.
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24 March 2012: Beware The L-I-N-K Of (L)ove and (INK) By Frank Kermit, Relationships While at a coffee shop a few weeks ago, I met a tattoo artist. He had his son’s name tattooed on his hand, and being the ever-inquisitive one, I asked him about his profession...

Open Relationships and Infidelity

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17 March 2012: Open Relationships Do Not Always Stave Off Infidelity By Frank Kermit, Relationships Some people believe that one of the surest ways to guarantee fidelity is to only do open relationships. The premise is that people only cheat in monogamous ...

What is a Relationship?

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10 March 2012: What is a Relationship? Is best defined by what it’s NOT By Frank Kermit, Relationships Over the years, I have been asked a number of times “What is a Relationship?” This is a harder question to answer than most people think. In my experience,...

Engaged! Now what?

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19 February 2012: Pre Marital Disclosure What you don’t know, you must know By Frank Kermit, Relationships Valentines day has come and gone. Some relationships have started. Some relationships have ended, and some relationships have proceeded to the next le...

Making Monogamy Work

This question has 2 answers by readers of DearCupid.ORG.
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5 February 2012: Making Monogamy Work By Frank Kermit, Relationships Monogamy is easier than open relationships, because the rules are simpler...but the application of the rules of monogamy is not as easy. Monogamy works for monogamous people...however...

Single Parent Dating, Not Just a Single Issue

This question has 1 answer by a reader of DearCupid.ORG.
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3 February 2012: Single Parent Dating – More Than Just A Single Issue By Frank Kermit At least 40% of marriages end in divorce. Depending on the study you read, the percentage can be higher. Even though the break down of families continues, the drive that ma...

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My boyfriend is manipulative and talks badly of me to friends. What do I do?

Q.   ok so i dont know what to do. Everytime me and my boyrfriend fight he always turns it around on me...he is very munipulative.We fight all the time and we live together. he tells me if i move out then he will break up with me. He says that all the ...

A.   9 September 2009: 1-Move out 2-Dump him 3-Dump your friend 4-Come to terms with why you would date and move in with a guy that is so manipulative to begin with, and why you would have a friend that would side with such a manipulator against you. #4 is the r... (read in full...)

Cheating girlfriend what do I do

Q.   i recently completly broke up with my son's mother that was with for about 3 years. i found out she cheated on me. i had a feeling something was going wrong with our relationship when she started going out to the bars with her single friends. i ...

A.   9 September 2009: First things first. The two of you have a child together, and that means you have some obligations. Know your rights, as a father, and as an ex-partner, whatever they may be. See a family lawyer, and research info on father-friendly ... (read in full...)

Am I being too sensitive?

Q.   I have been with my girlfriend for 3 months and this is by far the best relationship I have ever had (and that includes two failed marriages). We are very much in love. The problem is she has gone away for a skiing holiday with her girlfriends for a ...

A.   9 September 2009: "She tells me she loves me, but I would never want to go away without her for a few days - maybe she's not into me as much as I thought?" In the above statement you made, is where the answer is. You have an expectation that she should do, what ... (read in full...)

I heard Mom and Dad having sex and now I'm disgusted! How can I deal with this?

Q.   i need some help on this one well one night i was lying in my bed and I heard my mum and dad having sex i then felt really sick looking at them the next day i felt disgusted with them. is it normal to feel this way towards them Im to scared to talk ...

A.   11 August 2009: Your parents having sex is a good thing. It is when they don't want to have sex with each other that you should be worried. Count yourself lucky. Hearing your parents, walking in on them, hey it happens. No need to talk to them about it. ... (read in full...)

My husband doesn't know that I found out about his cheating, what should I do?

Q.   My husband tells me he loves me but he has been texting this lady since 2008 up until now. I see the number on the phone bill but he doesn't know I know. What should I do?...

A.   30 July 2009: You have some choices: 1-Bring it to his attention that you suspect something 2-Say nothing and ignore it. Although I am not a fan of option 2, some people live in denial and it works for them...knowing but never confirming. It reall... (read in full...)

He dosen't want marriage but I do, should I leave?

Q.   Does it make any sense to end a great relationship over marriage? We have a great relationship. We have been together for 6 years and have a daughter. When we first started this relationship I asked his views on marrage, and made it very clear that ...

A.   30 July 2009: It sounds as if you are already living together with children you produced together? Is this the case? Please correct me if it is not. If it is, then I think the issue is what marriage means to him. Specifically, how does he think things w... (read in full...)

What is the secret of a successful relationship?

Q.   Firstly, thank you for taking the time to read. As alot of agony aunts on here are in successful relationships I'd like to pick some minds about this topic. What IS the secret to a successful relationship? I've seen alot of relationships wh...

A.   30 July 2009: This is just my opinion. The key to making relationships work is for the man to address the particular emotional needs of a woman and for the woman to address the particular emotional needs of a man In my research I have come to bel... (read in full...)

Is slating about her boyfriend to me a sign that she likes me?

Q.   I like this girl, she's real cute and all and i'm getting the vibe that she likes me too. She's not single but she was telling me that her boyfriend is an 'insensitive p***k'. How should I take this?Is she saying this because she likes me and wou...

A.   29 June 2009: She likes you as a friend, and does NOT want you to replace her boyfriend. She is using you as a therapist to tell all her problems to. Next time, just tell her: "Stop! I am not your therapist, when you're with me, we have fun." ... (read in full...)

Is this betrayal?

Q.   My sister and husband are separated, I think I've fallen for him and in the past he has told me he feels the same is this wrong? Is it betrayal?...

A.   29 June 2009: You have to decide if losing your sister (and connections with the rest of your family as they will likely turn on you). You also have to consider that if things with the two of you don't work out, and he still manages to work things out with your ... (read in full...)

Am I cheating on my real boyfriend with my online guys?

Q.   hello, well i have a boyfriend in real, and i have maybe 9 guys online. i just wanted to know is it considered cheating on my real bf? and one guy i met online and know is planning to come see me!! im scared i will try to avoid it. am i che...

A.   27 June 2009: Yes it likely is, because of the context. It sounds like you and your boyfriend are in a (or suppose to be a) monogamous relationship. The first rule of monogamy is: You only have sex with one person. The second rule of monogamy is: You ne... (read in full...)

I'm 'straight' but I've fallen for a lesbian in a committed relationship...What to do?

Q.   I am a 40-something woman, and generally speaking I am and have been straight. I have always fantasised about women, rather than men, and have on a few occasions actually fancied other women, but have never done anything about it, nor especially ...

A.   17 May 2009: First, be very very careful. You WORK with her, and any move you make could cost you your job. Next, if she knows that you like her, and she has not made a move, then take that as a sign. I think you might want to consider that she may ha... (read in full...)

I know I'm straight but I'm also curious. What do you think?

Q.   Im not totally sure of my sexuality. I'm a real girly girl, absolutly love fashion and indie music scene. I have the most amazing boyfriend he's gorgeous and girls drool over him, he's absolutely crazy over me and i couldn't ask for anything more! ...

A.   17 May 2009: I think your feelings are very normal. You might be straight with bi-sexual tendencies, you might be on the bi-sexual range where you are physically attracted to one gender, and emotionally attracted to the other gender, or fully bi depending on ... (read in full...)

I am a virgin so this type of thing bothers me

Q.   Hi, I am a virgin guy 24 years old. I was on a trip few months back to some outstation.It was a group of some people so it was a nice time. We all slept in a single big room each time. I usually sleep wearing a payjama without underwears. ...

A.   23 March 2009: It makes perfect sense that this would bother you. To all readers, reverse the genders in this story. See the picture now? It sounds to me that you feel violated, and rightly so. There was no consent. You should not have to be sexual wi... (read in full...)

My community and religion do not accept gay people, what do I do?

Q.   can any body help me with this ugly situation? well it all started when i was 14 back in the school i notice that i like guys and enjoy chating with them all the time but during that time i never know exactely what is wrong with me i thought ...

A.   11 March 2009: It may not be safe for you to out yourself where you are. For now, keep it secret and learn some self defense techniques just in case. Your life could be in danger. Next, look to moving to a new territory that will have a community that will supp... (read in full...)

Should I accept my male friend (I'm bi) or live a lie with my fiancee?

Q.   I am a 26 year old bi male, who has been in love with one of my male friends for 5 years. I was going to tell him a few times but I always thought he was straight. He has now told me that he fancies me and wants us to be together. I would have ...

A.   5 February 2009: For the posters below... I did some internet radio interviews, one with a bi-woman, one with an asexual person, and interviews with swingers and people in open relationships (polyamory). I would offer that you visit my site at www.franktalks.c... (read in full...)

Should I accept my male friend (I'm bi) or live a lie with my fiancee?

Q.   I am a 26 year old bi male, who has been in love with one of my male friends for 5 years. I was going to tell him a few times but I always thought he was straight. He has now told me that he fancies me and wants us to be together. I would have ...

A.   2 February 2009: You ARE hurting her by living a lie. Be honest with her, and give her that honor of being able to make an informed decision. Your "bi" ness will not just go away even if you cut out your male friend. Break off the engagement, and set her ... (read in full...)

Step sister pregnant with my child, will we have problems in future?

Q.   my mother died when I was 1,after 3 years my father remarried,but my mother was from London,We stay in India,I have a step sister,she is 8 years younger than me.we started having sex when she was 15,my parents do not know about has they are very ...

A.   28 January 2009: The only thing I can think of in this situation is that the sex started when she was 15 (a minor) and you were 23. Also, were you her guardian during this time, and could it be that you abused your authority over her? 2 years later makes her ... (read in full...)

I'm in love with my boyfriend but I'm getting married to his best friend. What should I do???

Q.   my mom picked out a guy for me to marry. she asked me if I loved someone.... I told her about my boyfriend but my boyfriend of 2 years says he's not ready to get married and wants to break up. I was devastated. My mom says I have to get married by ...

A.   9 January 2009: im just worrried that how would he react when he finds out that im marrying his best friend? HE is your Ex, and thus you can not care how it will affect him. He had his chance. what if he trys to create problems? Part of being in any ... (read in full...)

18 in love with a 40 year old man

Q.   Dear Cupid, I am an 18 year old and I am in love with a 40 year old man. He doesn't know. I can't help it but everytime I see him or talk with him, I just want to be in his arms. I feel like there is no care in the world when I am around him. ...

A.   9 January 2009: I did a Lecture on exactly this topic entitled Dating Younger Women: A guide for older men to the emotional needs of loving younger women. It was about couples that are 20 years apart. It is actually more common that most people think, but there ... (read in full...)

Should I keep her???

Q.   Hello dearcupid. Yesterday I spoke about dirty text messages on my girlfriend's phone, most people told me either to give her an ultimatum, or just dump her. The only thing is through what I've seen would I be a mug to see if I can get past this, ...

A.   8 January 2009: Yes you would be a mug to see if you can get past this and wait. Where is your self respect? -Frank Kermit www.franktalks.com... (read in full...)

Locking eyes during sex?

Q.   Just curious...so, I read in an article of Cosmopolitan that if a guy locks eyes with you during sex, even just for a few seconds, it means that he wants more than just a physical connection with you. Do you all think that is true or is that a bunch ...

A.   8 January 2009: BS. I am a Seduction Relationship Expert. This is seduction tactic used to make a person feel a deeper level of intimacy than actually exists in a sexual relationship. The act of sex addresses all of a woman's emotional needs, whereas the act ... (read in full...)

How long will it be before my lover leaves his g/f & baby for me?

Q.   Hi, i don´t know how to start.I fell in love with a guy who has a girlfriend and have a baby(2 months) with her.He is my boss, and i use to work with him over one year as interpreter. Our relationship start by small games.I mean when i started we ...

A.   8 January 2009: He is not going to leave his family for you. You are just his mistress, not a candidate for his future wife. Have you considered the damage you are doing to that poor child? He would be having an affair with whoever he liked enough that was ... (read in full...)

I'm in love with my boyfriend but I'm getting married to his best friend. What should I do???

Q.   my mom picked out a guy for me to marry. she asked me if I loved someone.... I told her about my boyfriend but my boyfriend of 2 years says he's not ready to get married and wants to break up. I was devastated. My mom says I have to get married by ...

A.   8 January 2009: Well, first, you have to come to terms with the fact if you are really OK with arranged marriages. I assume that it is based on your culture, so if you truly feel that it is right for you, and that you can live with the consequences, then so be it. ... (read in full...)

Should I really saddle a kid with that legacy?

Q.   Well, I am currently caught up in a battle between my rational and biological elements. To put it simply, I never, ever, ever wanted a child and still don't, but there is some primal emotional need going on with me right now that says I do. I am ...

A.   8 January 2009: "I also was wondering if there was anyone else out there in the same boat?" My wife and I had this conversation before she got pregnant. We have family histories of diabetes, heart disease, obesity in my case, etc...my wife was adopted, so she d... (read in full...)

Should I believe him that he is not gay or is this a huge warning sign?

Q.   I caught my boyfriend of almost a year sending a naked pic to another man. This came as a huge surprise because before this he has always seemed extremely attracted to me and wants to have sex all the time. He is kind of emotional and feminine in ...

A.   8 January 2009: It is a warning sign. He has doubts, and you would be a fool to build anything long term with him on the "hope" he figures it out. If you are OK with dating a bi-male, or a guy that will one day realize he is gay and potentially leav... (read in full...)

Trapped between a current boyfriend and an ex.

Q.   I am still in love with my ex and he loves me, but I am in a new relationship. I dated my ex., who I will call S. for 4 years. He was my college buddy/studio partner/best friend/boyfriend. We essentially spent just about every day of the 4 years ...

A.   8 January 2009: Does anyone have any new advice besides the obvious? Why isn't "the obvious" good enough for you? What do you think the obvious is? First, get out of your current relationship. This is not fair to yourself, nor your BF. He deserves to be w... (read in full...)

Should I really saddle a kid with that legacy?

Q.   Well, I am currently caught up in a battle between my rational and biological elements. To put it simply, I never, ever, ever wanted a child and still don't, but there is some primal emotional need going on with me right now that says I do. I am ...

A.   8 January 2009: From what I understand, you might not be allowed to get your tubes tied until a certain age (depending on the country you live in). That being said, I think you are very responsible to be combating your biological urges when you are either n... (read in full...)

Should I really saddle a kid with that legacy?

Q.   Well, I am currently caught up in a battle between my rational and biological elements. To put it simply, I never, ever, ever wanted a child and still don't, but there is some primal emotional need going on with me right now that says I do. I am ...

A.   8 January 2009: From what I understand, you might not be allowed to get your tubes tied until a certain age (depending on the country you live in). That being said, I think you are very responsible to be combating your biological urges when you are either n... (read in full...)

Why are all these teenagers talking about their sex lives on here?

Q.   Is anyone else here fed up - and worried for - all the under-aged girls who come here, desperate for answers about how to solve their problems with their boyfriend who is 10 years older than them? I mean, a lot of these girls are 15 years or ...

A.   14 December 2008: I think the admins of the site need to consult a lawyer on the topic of sex and children, and put some boundaries in place so that certain questions never get posted. Sorry, but some of the advice given to under-aged people, whether or not you ... (read in full...)

My girlfriend was molested, when she was younger, she get nervous, when I touch her intimately, is there any way I can help her be less nervous, and enjoy our encounters?

Q.   I've been dating this girl for quite a while. We're really close and even talking about getting married once we graduate college. I've been touching and sucking her breast for a while now and she always really enjoys that but I've just started ...

A.   19 September 2008: IF you were truly as honorable as you claim, you would not have felt it necessary to lie about your age, and you would not be trying to justify it now. The most recent anon post is right on the money. Help her with words, not sex, but that was... (read in full...)

My girlfriend was molested, when she was younger, she get nervous, when I touch her intimately, is there any way I can help her be less nervous, and enjoy our encounters?

Q.   I've been dating this girl for quite a while. We're really close and even talking about getting married once we graduate college. I've been touching and sucking her breast for a while now and she always really enjoys that but I've just started ...

A.   18 September 2008: Sorry dude, but I do not beleive this for a second. She has now associated her negative feelings about sex with YOU, and is looking for a reason not to have sex with you so that you will leave her. Her religion? If that were a factor, the two ... (read in full...)

I was molested when I was a child and this has given me insecurities about myself! Please help!

Q.   I agree that being molested as a child can screw up ones sexual idenity. Here is my reasoning. I was molested from the age of 12 to the age of 14. I am not gay but I do beleive that I am Bi-sexual. Which is very weird because I dont want to be ...

A.   5 September 2008: Please read the book: The Sexual Healing Journey by Wendy Maltz: A Guide For Survivors of Sexual Abuse. I think you will find your answers there. Good luck and and I wish you peace and healing. -Frank B Kermit... (read in full...)

My ex has a girlfriend, but still has sex with me. What do I do?

Q.   Hi, I still love my ex but he's got a girlfriend and he keeps coming up to me for sex. He keeps telling me that he loves me. I have a daughter by him, and i'm not taking the pill. The sex with him is great. What do i do? ...

A.   5 September 2008: You said: ...and i'm not taking the pill. So basically, you are trying to trap him by getting pregnant again. If he is not committed to you with your current daughter, another child is not going to make a difference. He still has sex with... (read in full...)

Years after our marriage I find out he's my half-brother!

Q.   What would you do if you met a guy started going out with him than years later you got married to him and found out that you had the same dad....... What would you do? stay together? seperate? or see each other as brother and sister? ...

A.   4 September 2008: You are old enough to know not to waste people's time. Act like it. -Frank... (read in full...)

I'm pregnant and my boyfriend wants a DNA test, what should I do?!

Q.   im 5months pregnant in and i cheated on my boyfriend in i dont now what to do? I know if its not my boyfriend than im on my own and its going to be over because he already thinks its not his because i use to work in the strip club.and he wants a dna ...

A.   3 September 2008: By all means, get the DNA test done. Your child deserves to know who the father is. -Frank B Kermit... (read in full...)

My girlfriend was molested, when she was younger, she get nervous, when I touch her intimately, is there any way I can help her be less nervous, and enjoy our encounters?

Q.   I've been dating this girl for quite a while. We're really close and even talking about getting married once we graduate college. I've been touching and sucking her breast for a while now and she always really enjoys that but I've just started ...

A.   2 September 2008: I think what you are trying to do is very honorable and you obviously care about her and are coming from a very good place. I respect that. With that said, I want you to know what I am about to write is to offer you some perspective to understa... (read in full...)

My girlfriend was molested, when she was younger, she get nervous, when I touch her intimately, is there any way I can help her be less nervous, and enjoy our encounters?

Q.   I've been dating this girl for quite a while. We're really close and even talking about getting married once we graduate college. I've been touching and sucking her breast for a while now and she always really enjoys that but I've just started ...

A.   31 August 2008: Read this book: THe Sexual Healing Journey by Wendy Maltz: A Guide For Survivors of Sexual Abuse. It will explain everything you need to know. -Frank B Kermit... (read in full...)

Years after our marriage I find out he's my half-brother!

Q.   What would you do if you met a guy started going out with him than years later you got married to him and found out that you had the same dad....... What would you do? stay together? seperate? or see each other as brother and sister? ...

A.   29 August 2008: First, see a family lawyer as there may be laws in the area you live in which may force you to annul the marriage. Now, if the marriage is legal, THEN decide if you want to stay together, and if so, factor in the doctor's opinion about children... (read in full...)

I'm older than the girl I met, is that bad?

Q.   I am a 29 year old male from the UK. Two months ago, I met this lovely 21 year old young lady. I have fallen head over heels for her; we are very much in love. But, the age gap bothers me. Does it really matter that my girlfriend is many years yo...

A.   18 August 2008: I just completed a full lecture on this, and turned it into a 3 CD set. In it I explain that her feelings of this mortality issue comes directly from her emotional need of Fear Of Abandonment. In my CDs I explain a number of ways to deal with this, ... (read in full...)

How do we approach another girl for a threesome?

Q.   My girl recently said that she would like to have a threesome and wants to try it with another girl, she even said that she would love to watch another girl give me oral. I am happy to do this but i dont know where to start. we have looked on dating ...

A.   18 August 2008: http://www.oysternewspaper.com/ and http://www.trystmag.com/magazine/magazine.php The above links are two swinger magazines that I do an advice column for. Their websites offer forums for you to meet other swingers who can offer you t... (read in full...)

He doesn't know I have anorexia. Should I tell him and risk losing him?

Q.   So I've been going out with this guy for about 10 months now. He is wonderful---never pressures me to do anything I don't want to do, telling me how he loves just being with me, he's sweet, incredibly attractive, adorably shy, and always tells me ...

A.   17 August 2008: You are right. He WILL judge you. Not because telling him would be a bad thing, but because he is an idiot to be judging women (and people) for their challenges (including eating disorders. Why the hell would you stay with a man that is this jud... (read in full...)

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