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... Send *rank B Kermit a private message | | | *rank B Kermit's profile:Frank Kermit, MA is an Expert Relationship and Dating Coach. He is a Best Selling Author, educator, and regular media correspondent.
He teaches men and women about their emotional needs, how to address each others emotional needs, to be applied to ongoing loving relationships. In 2011, Frank completed an Advanced Certificate in Trauma Counseling and in 2014 completed a certificate in Hypnotherapy.
Frank Kermit has a newsletters that the public can sign up for:
http://www.franktalks.com/newsletter/ (upcoming media spots)
and when you sign up, you get a 400+ page ebook for free (a collection of 100 of Frank's best articles)
Frank answers public questions on dearcupid.org when and IF he has the time. Please understand that Frank makes a professional living through his Date Coaching, and therefore his private paying clients must come first. Frank does not answer private questions received on dearcupid.org unless you want to hire him for some private one on one coaching via skype or over the phone. You can learn more about Frank's Coaching services at www.franktalks.com/
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| Latest articles: Off Limits Dating
No replies yet... 18 September 2013: Is Someone Off Limits for Dating? By Frank Kermit ND, Relationships Mastering the art of dating requires a number of skills such as being socially calibrated, effective communication and knowing what you want. One of the areas that comes up for ...
How to Deal with a Toxic Person
No replies yet... 18 September 2013: The Best Way To Deal With Toxic People By Frank Kermit ND, Relationships Toxic people are defined in this article as people who lack the capacity to reason, or people have the capacity to reason but just do not want to reason with you. In t...
A Broken Engagement is Better Than A Happy Divorce
No replies yet... 31 August 2013: A Broken Engagement is Better Than A Happy Divorce By Frank Kermit ND, Relationships One of the ironies of couples counseling that I often find myself doing is taking the couple through the pre-marital coaching process when they may already be...
A Frank Comment on Miley Cyrus
This question has 6 answers by readers of DearCupid.ORG.
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31 August 2013: A Frank Comment On Miley Cyrus By Frank Kermit ND, Relationships I do not normally comment on the antics of popular culture, as so much of what we see of movies and TV are fiction based romances and relationships. I tried my best to stay fo...
The Wedding Speech
No replies yet... 26 July 2013: The Wedding Speech Remember this day, your wedding day. Not for the dresses and suits, not for the extravagance, nor the dinner and dancing, but remember your wedding day because of the reasons you chose to marry your spouse. Remember who is it that...
Sexually Incompatible Couples
No replies yet... 19 July 2013: Sexually Incompatible Couples Sex is not the most important thing in a relationship. However, couples who love each other dearly and connect on so many levels, but whom are sexually incompatible tend to find that sex can be at the core of a numb...
Separation and Dating, Part 2 of 2
No replies yet... 28 June 2013: Separation and Dating, Part 2 of 2 Separation does not automatically lead to divorce unless you let it. It is up to you and your partner to put in the work so that it does not happen. In the event you are the only one trying to work on yourself and ...
Separation and Dating Part 1 of 2
No replies yet... 22 June 2013: Separation and Dating Part 1 of 2 One of the most damaging actions an individual can take is to start dating someone new when going through a separation with their serious long term partner (spouse, common-law partner or a defacto-union). When I use ...
The Frank Break Up Formula
No replies yet... 14 June 2013: The Frank Break Up Formula By Frank Kermit ND, Relationships Breaking up with someone is rarely an enjoyable or pleasant experience. In fact, there are those individuals who stay in less than satisfying relationships, and even can go all the ...
The Frank Romance Formula part 3 of 3
No replies yet... 8 June 2013: The Frank Romance Formula Part 3 By Frank Kermit ND, Relationships Continued from last article: The Frank Romance Formula is: A. (Stimulation of the 5 senses) + B. (Addressing the emotional needs of that person) + C. (Sensual/Sexual Contex...
The Frank Romance Formula Part 2 of 3
No replies yet... 3 June 2013: The Frank Romance Formula Part 2 By Frank Kermit ND, Relationships Continued from last article: The Frank Romance Formula is: A. (Stimulation of the 5 senses) + B. (Addressing the emotional needs of that person) + C. (Sensual/Sexual Contex...
The Secret Of Seduction is that it Happens in the Future
This question has 2 answers by readers of DearCupid.ORG.
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3 May 2013: The Secret Of Seduction is that it Happens in the Future By Frank Kermit ND, Relationships The future is where actual seduction takes place. That is the key to seduction. It has very little to do with turning someone on when you see them. I...
The S.L.A.P. Theory Of Life Lessons
This question has 1 answer by a reader of DearCupid.ORG.
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27 April 2013: The S.L.A.P. Theory Of Life Lessons By Frank Kermit ND, Relationships Sometimes life will slap you down when it has a lesson to teach you. For some people, the slap may be a light swat, and for others the slap has to be a severe smack down. ...
Dating With Disabilities
No replies yet... 5 April 2013: Dating With Disabilities by Frank Kermit ND, Relationships I once went on a date with a woman that had severe food allergies. We went out to a movie and I wished she had told me ahead of time. Although she mentioned that she was deathly all...
Rejection: The Worst Best Thing That Can Ever Happen
No replies yet... 21 March 2013: Rejection: The Worst Best Thing That Can Ever Happen By Frank Kermit ND, Relationships Rejection is the worst best thing that can ever happen to you. Managing rejection is a necessary part in managing your love life. Over the course of your ...
Things they do not tell you about having kids
This question has 2 answers by readers of DearCupid.ORG.
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15 March 2013: Things They Do Not Tell You About Having Kids By Frank Kermit ND, Relationships I always try to be very practical and realistic in my articles. This can come across very negative, given that my topic is Relationships (and all things relative...
When Friendship Is Meaningless
No replies yet... 8 March 2013: Friendship Is Meaningless Stop Hanging Out With Friends Who Sexually Reject You By Frank Kermit ND, Relationships Friendship is meaningless. There I said it. Now before you shoot one of your nasty emails to the editor, actually read this colum...
Who Cares What People Think? Depends...
This question has 1 answer by a reader of DearCupid.ORG.
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1 March 2013: How Much Should You Care About What Other People Think? By Frank Kermit ND, Relationships T here will be times when we want to do something in our lives that is meaningful to us. It could be a decision related to abandoning education, wh...
Learn How to Choose the Right Fights!
No replies yet... 21 February 2013: Pick And Choose Your Fights By Frank Kermit ND, Relationships Fighting in relationships is normal. The issue is not whether you fight. The issue is HOW a couple fights. Do they talk out their disagreements? Do they wait until they are alon...
Starting Over After V-day?
No replies yet... 14 February 2013: Starting Over? By Frank Kermit ND, Relationships Valentine’s day can be a day of reckoning for some people. Meaning, the events leading up to, on the day of, and afterwards can really wreck your life. This is one of the reasons I often refer to...
A Relationship is: Acceptance at the Worst, Loving at the Best
No replies yet... 6 February 2013: A Relationship is: Acceptance at the Worst, Loving at the Best By Frank Kermit, Relationships At my weekly relationship workshop last Saturday I issued one of my famous “Frankisms” that seemed to really resonate with the attendees. I was trying...
Asking Hard Questions
No replies yet... 1 February 2013: Asking Hard Questions By Frank Kermit ND, Relationships When trying to decide if you should be committed to someone, moving in with someone, getting engaged, and getting married, each new transition brings about the unpleasant task of askin...
Ex Lovers and Weddings Do Not Mix
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24 January 2013: Ex Lovers and Weddings Do Not Mix By Frank Kermit, Relationships If you ever had sex with someone that is about to get married, and have been invited to the wedding, do not go. This is especially true if the spouse-to-be feels uncomfortable havi...
Couples in Transition: Monogamy and Non-monogamy
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16 January 2013: Couples in Transition: Monogamy and Non-monogamy By Frank Kermit ND, Relationships Couples who are experiencing a transition in the status of their relationship may sometimes look to explore new ways of redefining their sex lives b...
Common Sense For Common Scents By Frank Kermit, Relationships
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13 December 2012: Common Sense For Common Scents By Frank Kermit, Relationships As the holiday season approaches, invitations begin to swarm in for get-togethers from family, friends and even office parties. It is a time of people coming together, and in some ca...
Couples in Transition
No replies yet... 29 November 2012: Couples in Transition By Frank Kermit, Relationships When a couple is going through a change in the status of their relationship they are a couple in transition. This includes couples that are transitioning from monogamy to non-monogamy, from no...
Your Home Is Your Seduction
No replies yet... 15 November 2012: Your Home Is Your Seduction By Frank Kermit, Relationships Your date is coming over to your place! You have seen each other a couple of times already, but this is different. This is YOUR PLACE, not some coffee shop or movie theatre or restaur...
The Movie Of Your Life’s Journey
No replies yet... 6 November 2012: The Movie Of Your Life’s Journey By Frank Kermit, Relationships The movie of your life is how we each envision our lives unfolding throughout our life span. This concept goes beyond simple fantasizing of what your life would be like. Writing ...
What Love Masks by Frank Kermit
This question has 7 answers by readers of DearCupid.ORG.
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2 November 2012: What Love Masks By Frank Kermit, Relationships A mentor of mine taught me that love is not blind; it is just that categories are rigid. When you meet someone, you put that person in a category (lover, friend, temptation, fling, does-no...
The Chocolate Made It Too Much Work: An Article About EFT and Weight Loss
No replies yet... 2 November 2012: The Chocolate Made It Too Much Work An Article About EFT and Weight Loss I have a confession. I used to daydream about food. You know that point in the day when someone catches you; your head in your hands, that dreamy look on your face? If so...
Have You Tried NOT Dating Your Type?
No replies yet... 1 November 2012: Have You Tried NOT Dating Your Type? By Frank Kermit, Relationships We all have our “type”. By “type” I am referring to that type of person each of us is madly attracted too. Each of us has our preference of what we like, what turns us on, ...
Is there such a thing as Happily Single?
No replies yet... 19 October 2012: Is there such a thing as Happily Single? By Frank Kermit, Relationships Is being single really that bad? After all, when a person considers the amount of pain that a relationship or casual dating can cause, it may seem that just skipping the w...
Be Thankful For a Broken Heart
No replies yet... 11 October 2012: Be Thankful For A Broken Heart By Frank Kermit, Relationships Ok, I hate this. I really hate this part of the process. However, it is a necessary part of the process, and if I am expected to help encourage others to do it, first I have to demo...
Stop Talking About Your Ex On Dates!
No replies yet... 5 October 2012: Stop Talking So Much About Your Ex By Frank Kermit, Relationships So you are on a date with someone new. You are excited. You are nervous. You hope that this is finally going to be the one. You meet. So far, you both like what you see. This...
Dating in Social Circles
No replies yet... 29 September 2012: Dating In Social Circles By Frank Kermit, Relationships Dating can be tricky. Does the other person like you the way you think he or she might? Do you really like that person enough to get more serious, or do you want to keep it more casual a...
Frank Guide to Speed Dating
No replies yet... 21 September 2012: Frank Guide To Speed Dating By Frank Kermit, Relationships Every way to meet someone new is a good way. Though friends, through the Internet, blind dates, approaching someone you want to meet, at a workshop, matchmaking companies, business conv...
Relationship Goal Setting
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15 September 2012: Relationship Goal Setting By Frank Kermit, Relationships Setting goals in most areas of your life can be challenging. When it comes to relationships, there are even more challenges. Whereas in other areas of your life such as education, emplo...
Battling The Savior Complex in Relationships
No replies yet... 6 September 2012: Battling The Savior Complex By Frank Kermit, Relationships As children, many of us grew up on stories about the hero that saves a person, and in the process, earned the undying love and loyalty of the person saved so that the hero and that saved ...
Get Out Of Your Own Way!
No replies yet... 30 August 2012: Get Out Of Your Own Way By Frank Kermit, Relationships One of the biggest obstacles that a person can have as an obstruction on their path of finding happiness, peace and healing for their love life, is themselves. Although most people wou...
Your Choices Today Become The Past You Have To Share Tomorrow
No replies yet... 26 August 2012: Your Choices Today Become The Past You Have To Share Tomorrow By Frank Kermit, Relationships Young adults tend to discount how the choices they make today will impact their futures tomorrow. At least, when it comes to relationships. The bes...
Are You A Partner Or A Liability?
This question has 1 answer by a reader of DearCupid.ORG.
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17 August 2012: Are You A Partner Or A Liability? When it really is you and not them By Frank Kermit, Relationships “It’s not you, it’s me.” Have you ever heard that said to you when someone broke up with you? Have you ever been the one to use it when dump...
The 7 Weird Words That Help Define Relationships
No replies yet... 9 August 2012: The 7 Weird Words That Help Define Relationships By Frank Kermit, Relationships There are 7 certain words that catch many people off guard when it comes to relationships. They are: Lust, Love, Sex, Dating, Commitment, Marriage, and Monogamy. ...
Fear of Conflict Is Rooted in The Fear Of Loss.
No replies yet... 20 July 2012: Fear of Conflict Is Rooted in The Fear Of Loss By Frank Kermit, Relationships Are you too nice when it comes to relationships? Do you walk on eggshells because you do not want to upset your partner? Are you reluctant to enforce your bounda...
Re-Establishing Trust in a Relationship Article
This question has 2 answers by readers of DearCupid.ORG.
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12 July 2012: Broken Trust Takes More Than Time To Re-Establish By Frank Kermit, Relationships Trust is one of the most important components of a relationship. Love is a great start, but it takes more than loving someone, or being loved by someone, to make ...
Understanding Emotional Needs
This question has 2 answers by readers of DearCupid.ORG.
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4 July 2012: Understanding Emotional Needs: What We Respond To Versus What We Should Like By Frank Kermit, Relationships Emotional needs are about what a person responds to. It has nothing to do with what a person should like. We all should be attracte...
Red Flags: What To Watch Out For On A Date
No replies yet... 29 June 2012: Red Flags: What To Watch Out For On A Date By Frank Kermit, Relationships When you are on a date, and the person you are getting to know says or does something that triggers a well-honed instinct that you need to stop dating that person, you hav...
The Art of Storytelling on a Date
No replies yet... 25 June 2012: Art of Storytelling: Make or Break A Relationship Happy Ending By Frank Kermit, Relationships One of the challenges that people face when they go on dates is that they may not factor in that others will not understand what they are trying ...
Swinger Beginner Advice
No replies yet... 25 June 2012: Swinger Beginners: Keep it Out of the Work Place By Frank Kermit, Relationships Dear Frank, My husband and I recently returned from a business trip/vacation where a few of my husband's co-workers also brought their wives. We really hit it o...
When your Ex becomes a symbol and you can't get over it
No replies yet... 13 June 2012: When Your Ex Becomes A Symbol Relationship Symbolism of Why You Are Still Hooked By Frank Kermit, Relationships We are surrounded by the power of symbols. A symbol is more than just a design we recognize; symbols are a means of making meaning. ...
Ally Vs Enemy: Understanding The Emotional Needs of Men
No replies yet... 9 June 2012: Is She His Ally or His Enemy? Understanding The Emotional Needs of Men By Frank Kermit, Relationships The best way I know how to teach people about the emotional needs of men is to break it down to absolute fundamentals. If people can und...
Dating After A Break Up - Just How Long Should You Wait?
This question has 2 answers by readers of DearCupid.ORG.
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1 June 2012: Dating After Breaking Up? The Sooner The Better By Frank Kermit, Relationships “How much time should I wait before I start dating again?” is a common question that I get asked from someone that has just recently gotten dumped, and still sufferi...
Relationship Redemption: How To Forgive Yourself and Get Closure
This question has 2 answers by readers of DearCupid.ORG.
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23 May 2012: Relationship Redemption How To Forgive Yourself and Get Closure By Frank Kermit, Relationships We all make mistakes in life. If you have ever tried to get into a relationship, are in a relationship, or are recovering from a relationship, ...
Finding The Meaning Of Your Life And Relationships
No replies yet... 15 May 2012: The Meaning of your Relationships Starts With The Meaning Of Your Life By Frank Kermit, Relationships Contemplate your death. No seriously. In order to make meanings of your relationships past, present and those you will have in the futur...
The Mother-Lover Theory Understanding The Emotional Needs of Women
This question has 4 answers by readers of DearCupid.ORG.
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10 May 2012: The Mother-Lover Theory Understanding The Emotional Needs of Women By Frank Kermit, Relationships A woman can only play one of two roles in a man’s life. She is either his mother or his lover. She cannot be both. When a man addresses a wom...
Moving To The Next Level: Understanding The Hierarchy of Relationships
This question has 3 answers by readers of DearCupid.ORG.
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1 May 2012: Moving To The Next Level Understanding The Hierarchy of Relationships By Frank Kermit, Relationships One of the biggest mistakes people make in relationships is to promote someone up the hierarchy of commitment that has not really earned it. I...
Beware Your Friends when it comes to love
No replies yet... 15 April 2012: Beware Your Friends They May Not Want You To Be Loved By Frank Kermit, Relationships Mistakes Singles Make # 6… Seeking the approval of friends that influences your love life choices. Love may come and go, but a friendship can last a lifetim...
Are Relationships Worth The Risk?
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8 April 2012: Relationships = Risk But is it really worth it? By Frank Kermit, Relationships Given that there is so much risk in getting involved in relationships, or having sex for that matter, is it at all worth it to even bother? After all, a broken hear...
Tattoos and Relationships
This question has 4 answers by readers of DearCupid.ORG.
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24 March 2012: Beware The L-I-N-K Of (L)ove and (INK) By Frank Kermit, Relationships While at a coffee shop a few weeks ago, I met a tattoo artist. He had his son’s name tattooed on his hand, and being the ever-inquisitive one, I asked him about his profession...
Open Relationships and Infidelity
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17 March 2012: Open Relationships Do Not Always Stave Off Infidelity By Frank Kermit, Relationships Some people believe that one of the surest ways to guarantee fidelity is to only do open relationships. The premise is that people only cheat in monogamous ...
What is a Relationship?
No replies yet... 10 March 2012: What is a Relationship? Is best defined by what it’s NOT By Frank Kermit, Relationships Over the years, I have been asked a number of times “What is a Relationship?” This is a harder question to answer than most people think. In my experience,...
Engaged! Now what?
No replies yet... 19 February 2012: Pre Marital Disclosure What you don’t know, you must know By Frank Kermit, Relationships Valentines day has come and gone. Some relationships have started. Some relationships have ended, and some relationships have proceeded to the next le...
Making Monogamy Work
This question has 2 answers by readers of DearCupid.ORG.
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5 February 2012: Making Monogamy Work By Frank Kermit, Relationships Monogamy is easier than open relationships, because the rules are simpler...but the application of the rules of monogamy is not as easy. Monogamy works for monogamous people...however...
Single Parent Dating, Not Just a Single Issue
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3 February 2012: Single Parent Dating – More Than Just A Single Issue By Frank Kermit At least 40% of marriages end in divorce. Depending on the study you read, the percentage can be higher. Even though the break down of families continues, the drive that ma...
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He doesn't know I have anorexia. Should I tell him and risk losing him?
Q. So I've been going out with this guy for about 10 months now. He is wonderful---never pressures me to do anything I don't want to do, telling me how he loves just being with me, he's sweet, incredibly attractive, adorably shy, and always tells me ...
A. 17 August 2008: You are right. He WILL judge you. Not because telling him would be a bad thing, but because he is an idiot to be judging women (and people) for their challenges (including eating disorders.
Why the hell would you stay with a man that is this jud... (read in full...)
I kissed a girl because I was drunk and I'm so ashamed to tell my gir;friemd, I feel awful!
Q. hey, i just cheated on my absolutely perfect girlfriend, i kissed a girl in a night-club. so guilty. i broke up with her cause i couldn`t bear to look at her trusting face. i feel like a complete scumbag. i didnt tell her what i did i said i just ...
A. 17 August 2008: This is your guilt. If you are not going to tell her, it is your job to live with the guilt. Breaking up with her and making her think SHE did something wrong is hurting her as a means of transferring your guilt/hurt onto her. THAT is what you ... (read in full...)
His ex was a glamour model I can't compete with; why is he dating me...?
Q. I have recently started seeing this really fit bloke and I am really happy but I have just found out that he used to date a glamour model and it ended badly between them, anyway, my situation is that I am the most flat chested female ever, and I am ...
A. 17 August 2008: If you keep letting your self esteem act out like this, you will push away your bf.
He is with you because until now, you address his emotional needs, and it did not work out with her because she did not address his emotional needs.
It is n... (read in full...)
My friends and boyfriend rarely accept my suggestions and I usually only get to see them on THEIR terms, what can I do?
Q. Hi. I have a problem that is really affecting my whole life and I am not sure how to deal with it anymore. I love going out and enjoying myself and having fun with my friends and boyfriend but no one ever wants to do what I want. I gladly do what ...
A. 17 August 2008: You asked: I can't force people to do what I want so any ideas as to what I can do?
You can go do the things that you want to do without them, and in time, while you are doing those things, make new friends and even a new boyfriend that you can... (read in full...)
I kept a secret and he found out, now he can't trust me
Q. i have recently spilt from my husband of 4 years after i kept a secret from him and he found out.. he said that i should be able to tell him anything and that he now doesnt believe a word i say and has lost all feelings for me... i love my husband ...
A. 17 August 2008: It depends on the secret.
If the secret was something that he needed to know, something that would have affected him and your marriage directly, then yes, you violated his trust in you.
If the secret was something about your life that has no... (read in full...)
Do my parents have a right to dictate what are healthy/unhealthy boundaries between myself and someone I'm dating?
Q. About 10 weeks ago I met a woman through a mutual friend. We've officially been dating for about 8 weeks now. Averaging around 1.7 dates per week. We talk on the phone quite regularly. I'm 25 years old, responsible, and feel fortunate t...
A. 16 August 2008: If at 25 you still have to ask this, this may be the heart of the issue right there.
First, do not live at your parents house. It is not your home. It is there home. You just live there. Get your own place.
Next, no they have no right to tell... (read in full...)
I'm in love with my stepmother. What do I do?
Q. hi i am 19 and have been having a hidden relationship with my 38 year old step mom for almost 2 years. Sometime last year it turned sexual. Now she is divorced from my dad (since last week)and is waiting to move to an apartment with me (1 month). ...
A. 15 August 2008: A dog? That is part of your justification?
Look, try this. REVERSE THE GENDERS. What if it was a step father hooking up with his step daughter? Now how do you all feel?
Read the book The Sexual Healing Journey: A Guide For Survivors Of Sex... (read in full...)
I don't know what to do with my life
Q. hello, well this is going to sound really random. but im scared with what to do with my life. im going into my last two years of high school and im taking my GCSEs pretty soon. Ive always liked the ideas of writing books, i have good ideas but then...
A. 15 August 2008: Good for you for thinking ahead at your age. Very impressive.
I covered this topic in my book I'm a Man, That's My Job. To find out what would make you happy and fulfilled, do these writing exercises: Write your own eulogy, write a list of what ... (read in full...)
She wants us to have a baby and settle down but I'm not sure-help!
Q. i dont know what to do with my girlfriend, i do love her, but i enjoy spending time alone, i do have attractions for other woman, but i dont go looking for them. my girlfriend wants to have a family with me, but i dont want to, she knows i d...
A. 15 August 2008: You are being self centered (deleted last word).
Her clock is ticking. She wants a family, and if you have any doubts, BREAK IT OFF WITH HER. DO you realize that the older she gets to have a family the more health risks she gets for her and her ... (read in full...)
I want to be the 'Miss' and him the 'Master', but it seems like he don't want to control me!
Q. How do I get my husband to be controlling in the bedroom? I want to be the miss and him be the master. But it seems like he don't want to control me, or make me do things to him, but that's the only thing that gets me off, and in the mood. Can an...
A. 14 August 2008: Dominating your husband will only further his inability and desire to dominate his wife.
-Frank... (read in full...)
My boyfriend has serious depression problems, he is moody, angry, and I am having a hard time dealing with it, he wants to marry me, but I don't know, any suggestions that could help him?
Q. I have been with my boyfreind for a few years, not that age matters but I'm 41 and he's 52. He has been diagnosed with depresson a couple of years ago, anyway, I'm having a REAL HARD time dealing with it! I love him very much and he wants to marry ...
A. 14 August 2008: First, I recommend a book called Life After Loss by Bob Deits. It is about handling grieving and loss, and how sometimes those normal emotions get misinterpreted as severe depression. It may help.
Next,
No, do not get married. Marria... (read in full...)
I want to be the 'Miss' and him the 'Master', but it seems like he don't want to control me!
Q. How do I get my husband to be controlling in the bedroom? I want to be the miss and him be the master. But it seems like he don't want to control me, or make me do things to him, but that's the only thing that gets me off, and in the mood. Can an...
A. 14 August 2008: Start slowly, and have him do things to you...TELL HIM WHAT YOU LIKE. Have a talk about your fantasies...get him to start spanking you, and take it from there. He is not a mind reader.
Now, if you have already told him, and he still does not... (read in full...)
I have never even kissed a girl, let alone lost my virginity ~ and I am 28!
Q. VIRGIN AT AGE 28! I NEED ADVICE! Hi, I am a 28 year old male VIRGIN. I have never had sexual intercourse with the opposite sex; no girlfriends or sexual relationships. I dare not tell anybody of my personal situation- the humiliation and r...
A. 12 August 2008: You need to look at the source. It could be a lack of hormone, or it could be emotional. You could be trapped in a repeating behavior pattern that keeps you out of relationships. It could be based on an emotional dysfunction.
If not, it could be... (read in full...)
Should I break up with him even though he still wants to be with me?
Q. I still have feelings for my ex boyfriend who I was with for 6 1/2 years and we just broke up 2 months ago. I told me current boyfriend this and he still wants to be with me?!?!But I don't feel right staying with him when I have feelings for som...
A. 12 August 2008: You have been honest, which is a good thing. If he chooses to stay with you, it is his choice.
I do not think you need to break up with him, however, I do think that you should not accept any commitment long term from him UNTIL you can return i... (read in full...)
Does anyone have any advice on how to win a very stubborn guy over?
Q. theres a guy i like..but at the moment all we seem to do is argue. he calls me up when he drunk and gets other girls to speak to me! (don't ask why!!) and then is really rude when i do speak to him. its like hes constantly trying to make me jealous. ...
A. 12 August 2008: You need to really look deep within yourself to figure out WHY you would even want to be with a guy that is being this emotionally abusive to you.
-Frank B Kermit
http://www.frankadviceforwomen.com
... (read in full...)
I really want to be a songwriter, how do I get started?
Q. Ok, i know this isn't a relationship question but i'm hoping that you will answer it anyway.I really want to be a song writer and i know that all song writers don't make it but i am determaned to at least try.Iv'e heard that most song writers ...
A. 12 August 2008: First things first. Start writing. And then keep writing. Don't worry about the tune at this point. Think of writing lyrics like writing poetry.
Once you have a collection written up, start talking to your friends that play instruments and see ... (read in full...)
I took the advice of someone and made a move on a woman I like very much, she said she only wants to be friends, how do I change this?
Q. Over the past 2 weeks I have really fallen for someone who works down my local. I spent a couple of hours talking to her and drinking with her Saturday night after her shift, and I really thought she felt the same about me. The owner of the pub told ...
A. 12 August 2008: Do not attend the pub for a while until you are regularly dating more than one woman. Then when enough time has passed, and you are not physically friendly with your new lovers, show up at the pub with one of them. She will start to wonder if she ... (read in full...)
An already hot & heavy relationship, yet still a kinky twist!?
Q. Alright, this is mainly a question for the ladies but the men are more than welcome to answer as well. My girlfriend and I have pretty good little thing going, ...especially when it comes to the sex. I'll just put it this way, ITS HOT!!! We're ...
A. 11 August 2008: I suggest that you don't tell her anything about being outside her window at this point.
Surprise her with a gift of a new vibrator and tell her you want to watch her use it. Have a new adult video as part of the gift.
Once she gets that yo... (read in full...)
I had sex with two men on the same day, became pregnant, lost the baby, my boyfriend, one of the two men, does not knpw I cheated, should I confess?
Q. Ok so a week ago I had a miscarriage, and well depression is on my side, actually I've been depressed ever since I found out I was prego. Im 18 years old and I just graduated high school, and I now go to uc davis, going into the dentist field. So ...
A. 11 August 2008: If the situation were reversed would you want to know? Once you have that answer, you will know what to do.
Also consider that as long as this exists as a secret, it will be a secret that will have the power to blackmail you and destroy everythi... (read in full...)
I broke up with my girlfriend, because she cheated on me, after a year or so, we got back together, because she said she has changed, I can't trust her completely, how do I protect myself for getting hurt again?
Q. I recently got back with my long term girlfriend who I broke up with over a year ago. After breaking up with her boyfriend that she had for a year, she admitted having feelings for me once again, which led to us seeing each other and me breaking up ...
A. 11 August 2008: You asked: How can I protect myself from her crushing my heart again?
The best way to do this is NOT to date someone that you are unable to trust.
Find someone else.
-Frank B Kermit
http://www.frankadvicefor... (read in full...)
What do I do about Girls?
Q. I would consider myself a typically nice guy. Nice, defined as I like doing things for others, but I don't let them tread all over me either. I also would not consider my self confidence low. And yet still, I have the hardest time getting dates. ...
A. 11 August 2008: As a nice guy, you only address SOME of the emotional needs of women, which is why they "like you enough to be friends", but you are not addressing all the emotional needs of women, which would make them feel love for you.
I did a lecture on exact... (read in full...)
He told me people I stuff my bra when I asked him not to!
Q. My boyfriend told his friends that I stuff my bra when I said to not. He does feel pretty bad and told me right away. But I'm still mad at him. Does he have any respect for me? My friends think I should break up with him. Any ideas...
A. 11 August 2008: You asked: Does he have any respect for me?
Before he can have respect for you, you need to have respect for yourself, and stuffing your own bra is not the way to self respect. If you don't respect yourself, others will be unable to do it eithe... (read in full...)
I took the advice of someone and made a move on a woman I like very much, she said she only wants to be friends, how do I change this?
Q. Over the past 2 weeks I have really fallen for someone who works down my local. I spent a couple of hours talking to her and drinking with her Saturday night after her shift, and I really thought she felt the same about me. The owner of the pub told ...
A. 11 August 2008: I did a lecture on exactly this topic called: From Friends To Lovers: Stop Being Her Emotional Cookie Man.
You are currently in the category of her brain that makes her see you as a friend. She will never date you until you change that.
1-Don't... (read in full...)
My girl is about to embark on an arranged marriage to her cousin. Is there anything I can do to stop it happening?
Q. I have been in serious situation right now..I am from asian origin..I used to date this girl for 2 yrs..She is 20 and im 25...we had lil ups and downs..nothin major in our relationship...Last month she went on vacation to california to visit her ...
A. 10 August 2008: Look, whether she is set to marry her cousin or someone else, that does not change the fact that when made to choose between you and someone else, she chose someone else. It does not matter if she loves the other guy or not, or if he is allow to ... (read in full...)
I'm in love with my stepmother. What do I do?
Q. hi i am 19 and have been having a hidden relationship with my 38 year old step mom for almost 2 years. Sometime last year it turned sexual. Now she is divorced from my dad (since last week)and is waiting to move to an apartment with me (1 month). ...
A. 10 August 2008: The issue is NOT the age difference between you and your step mom. This issue is that you have betrayed your father, your own flesh and blood.
Relationships are hard enough to make work, and your started out as an affair and a betrayal of famil... (read in full...)
I got pregnant while I was separated from my husband, and now we're back together. What will I tell the child about who his father is?
Q. I need advice. I have been married 20 years, My husband and I seperated and I starting seeing someone. I have known this person for about a year, worked with him. We travel with a team of people so we seen each night and day for a year. Anyway I...
A. 7 August 2008: If your child knows her origin while growing up, being a "mistake" or a product of "bad choices" or whatever terminology you want to use will form part of that child's identity. As an adult, your child will have a better capacity to understand the ... (read in full...)
I love this girl, then I love her sister - what should I do?!
Q. Hey i really need help at the moment and i dont know who to turn to so i've came here. I've been in love with a girl for 3 years but i've never had the guts to ask her out and now im starting to get some feelings for her younger sister who is the s...
A. 7 August 2008: You are not in love, you are in lust, and have not acted on it with either girl.
So far, nothing to feel guilty for, but you do need to rethink what love means to you, and to learn the difference between love and lust.
-Frank B Kermit
www.fran... (read in full...)
I got really drunk and I think I had sex but I don't remember. What should I do?
Q. I got really drunk at a friends house with a bunch of people I go to school with. I think I had sex with someone and don't remember it. I woke up without my panties on and there was a cum stain on the front of my shirt, like where a guy might have ...
A. 7 August 2008: Three things you need to do asap
1-Morning after pill as a precaution, but it may be too late now
2-Get checked for STIs
3-Pledge never to drink again as you obviously can't handle it. At your age it is illegal anyways.
-Frank B Kermit... (read in full...)
I got pregnant while I was separated from my husband, and now we're back together. What will I tell the child about who his father is?
Q. I need advice. I have been married 20 years, My husband and I seperated and I starting seeing someone. I have known this person for about a year, worked with him. We travel with a team of people so we seen each night and day for a year. Anyway I...
A. 7 August 2008: I would suggest that you plan to tell your child when your child reaches an adult age. Make sure it is a written document to be given to him by a third party in the event something happens to you both.
However, you need to be ready to explain ... (read in full...)
We carry on as if we were a couple, but we're not! And now one of my friends is making a move...
Q. hi, im a 16 year old male with relationship problems! i have this realy close friend of mine, she and i have been friends for over 5 years . we tell eachother everything! we carry on as if we are a couple , but we not! i realy like her, but i'm ...
A. 7 August 2008: I did a lecture on exactly this topic called: From Friends To Lovers: Stop Being Her Emotional Cookie Man.
You are currently in the category of her brain that makes her see you as a friend. She will never date you until you change that.
1-Stop ... (read in full...)
He has reluctantly agreed to an STI test, but seems to be very annoyed at me. How do I deal with this?
Q. Hi, Me and my boyfriend have been together almost a year, I am 19 he is 26. we usually use condoms and i am on the pill. recently we were talking about sti testing and he told me he has never ever been tested. I was alarmed by this as i have alw...
A. 7 August 2008: You are not being out of order.
He is being immature and stupid.
Some people are scared of reality, and getting an STI is a dose of reality that lots of people can not handle.
You are doing the right thing. Your future children (with or... (read in full...)
I used to find him attractive! How did my mind change? Now I'm grossed out...
Q. I'm not overweight at all, but my boyfriend's thighs are smaller than mine! He looks emaciated, and when we makeout his hip bones hurt me! His waist is soooo small! And get this, he says he's stronger than me! Yet he never lifts weights! He says...
A. 7 August 2008: Well it could be two things...
1-You had Romantic Love with him, and not Real Love. In Romantic Love a person had their ideal partner in mind and superimposes it on the person they date. Once the illusion wears off, they see a real person a... (read in full...)
It's been 3 days, do you think he will ever contact me?
Q. I work with a service where guys who are lonely call for company of a woman. Was called to house of a guy 4 years younger than me who is studying to be a doctor. Into talking/over a drink there was a connection! I offered to strip (there is no sex)...
A. 7 August 2008: Just as you have a rule that you do not kiss guys you meet through a service, he probably has a rule not to get too involved with service girls.
If he is interested, he will contact you. However, he probably thinks you just want more money fr... (read in full...)
I've fallen in love with her...but everyone in her life seems to be disposable!! Help!
Q. I have an on line relationship with a woman for 12 years. At various times she loves me, and at times she doesn't. She's married and has cheated in real life on her husband since the first week they were married and continues to do so 8 years into ...
A. 6 August 2008: I think you need to consider that you are also emotionally dysfunctional too. Why else would you desire someone that obviously uses people like this. Stop making excuses for her just because you have the hots for her.
It is not your job to "fix"... (read in full...)
He seems to really care about me, but he wont leave his girlfriend who is carrying his baby!
Q. I have been seeing this guy that has a girlfriend who has a baby on the way. he has recently told me that he misses me alot and that he wants to be with me and that he loves me. He seems to really care about me, but he wont leave his girlfriend who ...
A. 6 August 2008: Well I do not know if you are stupid like you ask. However, I think you are totally in the wrong.
His child is the victim here, not you. That child needs its father, and you are trying to justify stealing its father away from it.
Take a ... (read in full...)
We've been married for 18 months and she's still a virgin! What can I do?
Q. Hi, I have been married since March '07 (nearly 18 months ago), I love my wife to pieces but am extremely stuck on this. She was a virgin when we started going out, but the problem is she is still a virgin now. We've been together since '03, and...
A. 6 August 2008: First of all, without sex (consummation, penis vagina penetration) you are not really considered marriage by some religious cultures and even some laws (depending on the territory you live in). So that is something you need to consider. I know you ... (read in full...)
What is the secret of a happy life?
Q. i still not feeling beter. i always worry about silly things.i don't find joyful life still now even if i got a job.what is the secreat of life?...
A. 6 August 2008: I covered this topic in my book I'm a Man, That's My Job. To find out what would make you happy and fulfilled, do these writing exercises: Write your own eulogy, write a list of what you want to be remember for, write a list of all the things you ... (read in full...)
I'm nearly 30 and still I don't feel ready for sex. What's going on?
Q. I need to gauge some opinions here please aunties. I'm nearly 30, single, and still a virgin; but this isn't what bothers me, it's the fact that I don't feel ready for sex yet. I have no drive for sex. I see people posting questions on here...
A. 6 August 2008: You may simply be asexual, which is a condition where a person has no desire to have sex. I did an interview with a guy named David Jay of a website that helps give information to asexuals about asexuality.
If this is your situation, you are very... (read in full...)
I don't want to ruin our friendship, but I really love this girl. We've been best friends for months and she refuses to take it one step further.
Q. I’ve been best friends with a girl for about 8 or 9 months now, and she’s the most wonderful thing that has ever happened to me. She still says we’re just friends but I feel as if our relationship has recently progressed into something more. We seem ...
A. 6 August 2008: I did a lecture on exactly this topic called: From Friends To Lovers: Stop Being Her Emotional Cookie Man.
You are currently in the category of her brain that makes her see you as a friend. She will never date you until you change that.
1-Stop ... (read in full...)
I'm in love with my best friend... what do I do?
Q. okay so eya i know this guy right he spends a night at my house all thee time we talk all day bought our problems and stuff and he very attracitve and understanding and i love him so much but the thing is hes my best friend and if i tell him how i ...
A. 6 August 2008: Before you tell him anything, you need to prove that you could address his emotional needs. I did a lecture on turning friends to lovers, and although it was directed for men, the principles can still apply to you.
Read the reviews that have not... (read in full...)
He wants to know my fantasies... but they are SO dirty, I don't think he could handle it.
Q. My boyfriend wants me to tell him my fantasies, but I'm so nervous. Some of them are really DIRTY. For example, I have rape fantasies, one of the most common I know, but kind of hard to explain. Especially since I want it rough. Not just him taking ...
A. 6 August 2008: If he could not handle it, do not share them with him yet. Tell him to read the book My Secret Garden which is all about women's sexual fantasies. If he can handle what is in that book, THEN he has proven he can handle anything you have to tell ... (read in full...)
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