Like what
she writes?
... Add *isha-1 to your favourite agony aunts
Want to get in touch?
... Send *isha-1 a private message | | | *isha-1's profile:Hi there!
Be brave, Tell the truth. Be kind. If you can do that all in the same sentence, you will be an amazing agony aunt. Sign up. I'm still trying to reach that ideal.
I heard this quote recently: ""The truth is like castor oil. It’s difficult to take and hard to swallow, so we get them to laugh and while their mouths are open, we pour a little in." -Harold Clurman
If you have an urgent question, please post it on the main page. Real life keeps me busy and has enough going on to keep me from being on here 24/7.... I hope yours does too! ;)
Current book recommendation: Untethered Soul, by Michael Singer. A New Earth by Eckhart Tolle. The Power of Now, also by Eckhart Tolle. Really powerful stuff in there about not letting your runaway thoughts take over your life. Be present in the Now. You have what you need, right there, right inside yourself. Do yourself a HUGE favor and read these books. They may lead to an important and fundamental shift in your well-being. "Unease, anxiety, tension, stress, worry — all forms of fear — are cause by too much future, and not enough presence. Guilt, regret, resentment, grievances, sadness, bitterness, and all forms of nonforgiveness are caused by too much past, and not enough presence." --Eckhart Tolle
All time fave relationship figure out book: A Fine Romance, Judith Sills, PhD. Buy if you are stuck and can't figure out why he won't commit, or why you keep picking guys who can't commit.
"Remember that not getting what you want is sometimes a wonderful stroke of luck." -The Dalai Lama
"Most people are doing the best they can, given what they know and understand. Including you. If they knew more and were aware of more, they would do things differently." -- Louise Hay
"If you tell the truth, you don't have to remember anything." -Mark Twain
I like these links right now: http://www.mindbodygreen.com/0-4593/A-Simple-Way-to-Let-Go-of-Our-Negative-Patterns.html
http://www.positivelypositive.com/2012/04/04/25-life-lessons/
So here's the thing. Asking for help is a sign of strength, not a sign of weakness. Weakness is doing the same thing over and over again and expecting a different outcome. Actually, according to Albert Einstein, that's the definition of insanity but I think that's a bit of a strong word choice.
“Our prime purpose in this life is to help others. And if you can’t help them, at least don’t hurt them.” -The Dalai Lama.
The choices you make may affect others. Think about the consequences, intended or unintended, before you do something that you may have to explain later. Imagine you are standing in front of a group of people and have to defend what you chose to do.... if you can't manage to do it well, that's a fairly plain indicator it's a bad idea.
If everyone who loves you hates your partner, there might be a problem. If you only have your partner, there IS a problem.
http://www.mindbodygreen.com/0-8202/12-signs-youre-in-a-toxic-relationship.html
If he’s mean to you now, he’s only going to get worse. Some people are energy vampires; they feed on the pain they inflict on others. They are broken. They will break you. Get out. Don’t fool yourself into thinking you can fix him. You can’t.
You have my permission to say “no.”
If you are depressed, think of it like an illness. You have to treat it. Medicine can help. Talk to your doctor. If you’re drinking a lot, you’re already self-medicating. You might as well get some prescription-grade pharmaceuticals to help you get to a point where you can figure out why you’re self-medicating.
There’s a reason it’s called ‘junk food.’
Yoga is good for the body and the mind as well as soothing the spirit. Try it. Brisk walks are great too.
Don't eat crap. Canned sugary beverages or canned diet beverages are NOT good for you, they have no nutritional value and set you up for a lot of bad stuff. Don't drink them. Water is good. Decide if you can tolerate coffee or tea (I love them both) and then drink those in moderation.
Life is nasty, cold, brutal, unfair, and crappy. It’s also amazing, beautiful, uplifting, awe-inspiring and fun. You choose how you’re going to approach it every day.
I have a few soapboxes that I tend to haul out: I don't like to see people put their health or future at risk and I REALLY don't like to see them put other's health or future at risk. I feel strongly that not providing good sex education or keeping sex education from children is a form of child abuse. It's like sending them out into the world not knowing how to buckle a seatbelt.
I love this video from plannedparenthood.org (How Pregnancy Happens): http://websrvr40nj.audiovideoweb.com/avwebdsnjwebsrvr4501/portal/media/media-050516-pregnancy.html
More good information from plannedparenthood.org on the various methods of birth control:
http://www.plannedparenthood.org/health-topics/birth-control//birth-control-effectiveness-chart-22710.htm
I don't have any expertise in abusive relationships, but I do think there are some common sense basics that people who are in one might be missing. Find out more here: http://www.mental-health-matters.com/index.php?option=com_content&view=article&id=171
Be brave, Tell the truth. Be kind. If you can do that all in the same sentence, you will be an amazing agony aunt. Sign up. I'm still trying to reach that ideal. |
|
| Latest articles: Questions to ask before getting married!
No replies yet... 24 March 2016: I just read a great article in the New York Times online. "13 Questions to Ask Before Getting Married” It was written by Eleanor Stanford and posted March 24, 2016. http://www.nytimes.com...
Need Christmas or other holiday gift ideas? Look here!
No replies yet... 3 December 2013: Every year, DearCupid sees an influx of questions asking "What should I get for my boyfriend/girlfriend/significant person? Help!" This question has been asked so many times, we suggest our posters use the search feature of the site here: ...
A little primer on women and sex...
This question has 29 answers by readers of DearCupid.ORG.
Newest answer was posted
11 November 2011: A Primer on Women and Sex Look, we girls are funny. We don't sexually mature all overnight, our first sexual experiences are often painful, crappy and frankly unfulfilling on many levels. We don't know how to give blowjobs, most of us don't grow up ...
Valentine's Day Gift Ideas
This question has 6 answers by readers of DearCupid.ORG.
Newest answer was posted
26 January 2011: Each year, we here at DearCupid see many submissions asking, "What should I get my boyfriend/girlfriend/wife/husband/lover/partner for Valentine's Day?" I think it would be great to consolidate these questions and some ideas into one place, so I've ...
Retrograde jealousy
This question has 102 answers by readers of DearCupid.ORG.
Newest answer was posted
25 July 2010: DearCupid sees many stories about men and women who find out after they are married that their partners have more sexual experience or partners than was initially understood. It is a very real problem for the one who is devastated to discover the ...
Advice to young men about young women
This question has 11 answers by readers of DearCupid.ORG.
Newest answer was posted
1 May 2008: I posted this as an answer to a young man, a virgin, who wanted to know about his young girlfriend, also a virgin... First, I know it's hard to believe but a girl her age may not know her body very well. She may not know what is sexually stimula...
More than one way to get up the Duff!!
This question has 8 answers by readers of DearCupid.ORG.
Newest answer was posted
14 March 2008: Some us ‘Aunts’ have been entertaining ourselves with fundamental questions about various ways pregnancy occurs…. I remembered that there were strange stories surrounding the births of some of the gods and goddesses of ancient myth, and I had a ...
|
I think I'm in love but he hasn't called me in a week
Q. So here is my problem. I think that I am in love. This makes absolutely no sense. Here is my story... I was in his class, he was my professor, I his student. There was some sexual comments made but never to the extent where someone would report it, ...
A. 18 March 2012: Sorry to hear that it all went pear-shaped for you but I think perhaps you will be a bit wiser from the experience. Best wishes for your new romance.... (read in full...)
A male virgin and a much younger and more experienced girl - potential humiliation or a great opportunity?
Q. Hello! This isn't the first time I've asked a question that is in some way related to this topic, but I hope it will be the last! First, some important background information. Somehow I have managed to get to the grand old age of 27 while re...
A. 5 February 2012: I've been reading a book called "The Power of Now" by Eckhart Tolle. It contains some pretty interesting ideas on how our minds work against us. Sounds like yours is earning double overtime. You have to get beyond your inner tormenter, and I think ... (read in full...)
How do I tell my parents I'm going to date the boy who used to bully me?
Q. hey, i like this guy, and i am going to try it out with him. except a month ago this boy was bullying me only because he was with this new girl who did not like me, he was only doing it cause he was under peer pressure. he has loved me for lik...
A. 30 January 2012: Sounds like a plan! I would put the items in this order: wait a few months, after telling parents about his interest, THEN go on a few dates.
Moms and Dads have your best interests at heart and you know something? They were your age once too, and ... (read in full...)
How do I tell my parents I'm going to date the boy who used to bully me?
Q. hey, i like this guy, and i am going to try it out with him. except a month ago this boy was bullying me only because he was with this new girl who did not like me, he was only doing it cause he was under peer pressure. he has loved me for lik...
A. 30 January 2012: Anyone so easily swayed by peer pressure is likely to succumb to it again. I'd hold off on dating him for at least a month, until his intentions are more obvious.
As far as telling your parents, be honest. Tell them what you know of him and then... (read in full...)
Strange phone call!
Q. What does it mean when a lady calls you and doesnt say hello back but stays on the phone...
A. 27 January 2012: She hit the 'mute' button on her phone and didn't realize it?... (read in full...)
Is he using me or...?
Q. I have been dating a younger man for approximately 6 months. He seems to be crazy about me and treats me like a queen around the house. His situation is as follows: he had a break-down approximately 1 year ago after he broke up with the mother ...
A. 27 January 2012: I don't see this relationship working out. You have very differing ideas on managing money; I don't blame you for feeling like a cash machine but you've been paying for things so he probably figures you may grumble a bit but will ante up if ... (read in full...)
I feel depressed and sad that my parents are still trying to have children and they aren't thinking about me and my feelings!
Q. i recently came to know that my mom had a missed abortion with a 9 week fetus. I feel so embarrassed and angry and sad because i am 20 and old enough to have my own kids but they want a second kid after so many years. I found out that she had a ...
A. 27 January 2012: A friend of mine is pregnant, a big surprise as she and her husband were not planning it. She didn't tell anyone until she was just about to show because they weren't sure it was going to be a viable pregnancy due to some medical conditions she has. ... (read in full...)
Should I stay with a mentally ill boyfriend?
Q. Hi all. I've been with my bf for almost 3yrs. He has as few problems with anxiety and depression. He has even been on anti depressants for 3months. Anyway whenever he drinks even a little these feelings he has amplifies and the smallest thing can ...
A. 27 January 2012: And to add to my answer, I want you to tell his parents about the drinking, the attempt to crash your car by grabbing the steering wheel and the suicidal comments. This man needs to be under close medical supervision and if these suicidal thoughts ... (read in full...)
Why am I so picky and intense when it comes to relationships and crushes?
Q. Hi, I hope no-one finds this weird, but I've got a problem and was hoping someone could relate. I'm 18 and confused by my attitude to relationships. Since I was very young girls have been important to me and I've always developed intense cr...
A. 27 January 2012: I have no idea why you react this way, and I think it might be a good idea that you explore that with a counselor. If you want to have a healthy relationship in the future it will behoove you to examine why your thoughts work the way they do. I have ... (read in full...)
Why is the ex still trying to be in contact?
Q. I broke up with my girlfriend of four years about eight months ago. Things weren't going well for one whole year. That precisely happened a year after she joined a course. But she opted for break up a few months later. But we were in contact until...
A. 27 January 2012: It sounds as though you are very busy pushing her away, so no doubt she will go away. I don't think she will want you back after you flamed her, then ignored her. I would declare an end to hostilities and just allow the past to remain in the past. ... (read in full...)
Does she like me or does she already have a girlfriend?
Q. hi im a lesbian in my 30s. i met this woman through another friend of mine and we have become friends. she does text often and i visit her once a week. we seem to get on well as mates and she seems to like meeting up. nothing happens we just chat as ...
A. 27 January 2012: Could it be that she just doesn't see you as someone she would date and that's why she says she has a girlfriend? That's what I might do if I didn't want to hurt someone's feelings.
If you are growing closer, you could ask her how her rela... (read in full...)
Am I right in wanting more of a commitment from my bf, whom I've lived with for 2.5 years, other than moving to a new place and buying our furniture?
Q. Hi, Would really appreciate some advice as I cannot find any useful articles online. Ive been with my boyfriend for a few years and we have lived together for two and a half years. In the past, it wasn't too serious and we rented places tha...
A. 27 January 2012: If moving in together with him is going to lead to resentment on your part, I'd say to continue to live apart. If you want to be married before moving in together, then stick to that, I don't think it's unreasonable.
Some people have objections to t... (read in full...)
I was once unfairly accused of theft as a child and the trauma affects my behaviour even now!
Q. I have no idea where to post this question, but I seriously need to let this out and get some advice. Okay here it goes... Well when ever someone loses something and they're looking for it, I immediately get nervous. I start to shake, my heart ra...
A. 27 January 2012: It sounds like you are having panic attacks. You need to see a doctor and discuss the symptoms. You may need some therapy or medications to get the attacks under control. It sounds like it would be very fixable with the right treatment approach.
B... (read in full...)
Should I stay with a mentally ill boyfriend?
Q. Hi all. I've been with my bf for almost 3yrs. He has as few problems with anxiety and depression. He has even been on anti depressants for 3months. Anyway whenever he drinks even a little these feelings he has amplifies and the smallest thing can ...
A. 27 January 2012: At your age and with his symptoms? I'd say it's probably best to let him go and stop trying to be his therapist and helper. He has to decide for himself when it's time to clean up; you can't do that for him.
The thing that makes me tell you that... (read in full...)
Lack of sex a reason to break up?
Q. My girlfriend and I have been together for just over two years. She recently moved in with me about five months ago. Prior to moving in, she would come over to my place on weekends. We’d snuggle before bed and have sex at least once a week. Now that ...
A. 27 January 2012: She's given you some major cues to her state of mind, if you are paying attention. She doesn't feel attractive due to her weight. She's on birth control, which may be a factor in the weight gain as well as the loss of drive.
You seem to think that... (read in full...)
My boyfriend got a lapdance at a strip club and now I am struggling to deal with this, am I just being silly?
Q. My boyfriend went to see strippers and has got a private lapdance on a number of occasions. Im finding it hard to deal with, I feel inadequate and dont feel comfortable having sex at the moment. I just feel he'l compare the way I look to the ...
A. 26 January 2012: If it were my boyfriend, I'd break up with him on the grounds of poor taste. To me, a guy in a committed relationship getting lap dances is just plain icky. Sorry, but there is a big difference between looking at an image on a screen or even in real ... (read in full...)
Our living situation is getting to my wife. I endure her regular tantrums. Do I change our whole lifestyle and income due to her whim?
Q. I am 41 and I have been married to my wife for 19 years. We have no children. We bought this house in a large suburb (120K people) 10 years ago. It's near the mountains and we get a lot of wildlife. There are lots of trees, too, and you'd never know...
A. 26 January 2012: Being well off doesn't prevent someone from becoming depressed. Treat her as though she has an illness that can be treated and get her to the doctor.
Being a military brat, she's gone through a lot of goodbyes in her life and I expect she's expe... (read in full...)
I'm starting to see sex as another job/chore. My husband jokes its my "duty" but I really feel like telling him he can shove it
Q. My and my H have been together for over 10 years and have 2 children we both work full time. I am 27 and he is 35 we get on great and normally I have the higher sex drive however atm I just don't have the energy/need to have sex I haven't lost my ...
A. 25 January 2012: How did you cope when you had the higher sex drive and he turned you down?... (read in full...)
He puts his arms around me and makes a lot of sexual comments. Any idea why he's acting this way?
Q. Does this guy like me? I have a friend that I've known for a couple of years but recently he's started acting differently and I'm not sure why. My friends all think it's because he like me but I think he might just be doing it to get a reacti...
A. 25 January 2012: Maybe he sees you in a different way now, as a girl who is worth flirting with.
Why not challenge him on this? Find out, if you are so curious!
'Drew, you sure are being flirty. Are you ever going to get around to asking me out or is this all I ca... (read in full...)
How do I deal with her past that is the opposite of my views? I know she's changed but the images are out there!
Q. [Mod note: please note that the poster is 22 years of age, not 32. The poster should consider starting a new account so this doesn't create confusion later.]] So, I'm a 22 year old guy beginning a new relationship with a girl. I'm not one to jump...
A. 25 January 2012: "So, what kind of roles are you looking for? Are you going to do any more of those more raunchy scenes?"
I don't think it's that difficult to ask. Just ask. If you are afraid it's going to point to the fact you have an issue with her past role... (read in full...)
I love him like I've never loved anyone before, but should I marry him and be in a long distance marriage for so many years?
Q. Hey guys and dolls there :-) my head is about to explode. I'm in a longdistance relationship with my bf- soon to be husband. He lives a bunch of hrs away by plane. We get to see each other very often, we're both very committed to making things work. ...
A. 25 January 2012: Why do you have to wait 5-7 years? Why can't you go be with him or he come to you? To me, that would indicate that I'm not a high enough priority for him to change his life to accommodate my presence on a permanent daily basis. Not good enough, I'm ... (read in full...)
I'm having sex with different prostitutes! Is this sexual behavior normal?
Q. I wanted two know if my sexual behavior is normal i started two have sex with prostitutes since i was 19 then it was not a big deal because i was only going to a prostitute every 30 days or more. But since I get every time more frustrated of not f...
A. 24 January 2012: I take it you are asking if this is healthy. No, it's not. You are putting yourself and your sex partners at risk of a whole long list of scary and nasty sexually transmitted infections.
Go see your doctor. Get a thorough checkup and ask for help... (read in full...)
Do I give up on me orgasming so he can? My Boyfriend says I Squeeze too Much, too Early during Sex :(
Q. OK, so here's my problem. My boyfriend says I squeeze my vagina too much too early during sex. All I'm doing is involuntarily starting to have a orgasm, which happens multiple times during sex IF i'm enjoying it. But he won't let me! He tol...
A. 22 January 2012: How about taking turns? "This one is for me, the next one is for you." Literally keep a scoresheet. That way, he can learn to stay inside you and you can learn to hold off on early orgasms. Then the partner who didn't get to have the orgasm of ... (read in full...)
My wife wants kids and I don't!
Q. I'm 26 and married for 4 and a 1/2 years and my wife wants kids, but sometimes i don't. Yesterday we were in her friends home and i saw their kid energy all night and i thought to myself: "My GOd! I don't want kids, i dont want that hell! I dont ...
A. 21 January 2012: What was your agreement when you married?... (read in full...)
In his message to me, he said "don't run off with the circus in the meantime ". What did he mean?
Q. This guy cancelled our date yesterday, and i have an update on the situation. I sent him a private message last night saying that it was a shame that we couldn't meet, and that we could meet again sometime if he wanted, and i said i hoped he liked ...
A. 21 January 2012: Ease off, there, girl! Give him a chance to chase YOU. You are obviously interested in him, but being too available and going to his house may signal to him that you are either a) desperate or b) easy. Even if you have told guys to stop and they ... (read in full...)
What makes a girl a "safe bet"?
Q. What does it mean when a guy says you are 'a safe bet' ???????...
A. 20 January 2012: It depends on the context.
You could be very predictable.
You could be a sure thing as a sex partner.
You could be someone who will say yes when asked out.
You could be someone who isn't into drama.
It depends on the context.... (read in full...)
How do I choose between three guys?
Q. Hi everyone. im dating three guys and two of they guys have already known that am double dating. I was thinking that will make them leave me but they are still begging me to stay. All i want now is how to choose between these three guys. Am ...
A. 20 January 2012: If you can't choose between any of them, that means there's no clear pick for you, which means you may as well keep on dating. As long as you are open and honest about the fact that you are still looking for the right guy, it's fine to continue your ... (read in full...)
Am I to blame for getting dumped?
Q. I used to talk dirty with my very close guy friend P (read: sexting). We had a deal that it was just for fun and only talking and it wasnt gonna go anywhere. But one day we had a drunken makeout session. Soon after our friendship soured and we ...
A. 20 January 2012: Welcome to the wonderful double standard. A guy who sexts takes no heat for it, a girl who does is labeled a slut.
I think your 'deal' was broken when you did have a drunken make out session. How old are you? 16 or 17? Way too young to handle your... (read in full...)
I'm confused about my relationship with him!
Q. [Mod-Note: Names have been changed for privacy] hi dear cupid, My problem is my friend, Paul. We're only friends not a boyfriend and girlfriend but he is ignoring me not by not responding in this side, no calls, no msgs and no e-mails ...Paul's...
A. 20 January 2012: Paul doesn't sound as though he wants his mother or you deciding whom he should like or want to marry. I would recommend that you stop email, calling or messaging him, stop discussing Paul with his mother and keep the professional relationship ... (read in full...)
I saw him kissing another girl before he kissed me
Q. Really could do with advice, so please be honest guys and tell me what you really think of the situation. I've tried to put it as short as I can, so it doesn't sound like an essay of a story.. This guy I met in a bar just over two weeks ago, we've...
A. 20 January 2012: By talking every day since you met, does that mean texting or actually, on the phone voice contact?
Anyway, I don't see why you can't be clear and open about why you reacted the way you did.
"John, I just wanted to let you know that I was feel... (read in full...)
Am I Playing Hard To Get?
Q. A guy I went out with twice texted me on the fourth day saying he had fun but he'll be out of town on business during the week. He asked to see me on the following weekend but we didn't say when, what time, etc. There was no other contact during ...
A. 20 January 2012: Of course you can't block out your entire weekend on a vague message. Next time, I'd text back something like: "Sounds good, what night and time were you thinking so I can keep my calendar free?"
At this point, if you want to see him again, I thin... (read in full...)
What are girl's erect penis shape fantasies?
Q. I Always wonder what erect penis shape makes girls more horny when they look at it (upward , downward or straight) ? and why? what shape of erect penis(upward , downward or straight) do you girls imagine in your fantaces? PLEASE answ...
A. 20 January 2012: I hate to break it to you, but most girls probably don't fantasize too much about the penis. They fantasize more about the man, what he looks like, how he treats the girl, how the man makes her feel. Looking at a naked penis won't make most women ... (read in full...)
A male virgin and a much younger and more experienced girl - potential humiliation or a great opportunity?
Q. Hello! This isn't the first time I've asked a question that is in some way related to this topic, but I hope it will be the last! First, some important background information. Somehow I have managed to get to the grand old age of 27 while re...
A. 20 January 2012: Are there no professional matchmaker services in the UK? I'm sure you are clever enough to find one, if you put your mind to it. Good luck!... (read in full...)
A male virgin and a much younger and more experienced girl - potential humiliation or a great opportunity?
Q. Hello! This isn't the first time I've asked a question that is in some way related to this topic, but I hope it will be the last! First, some important background information. Somehow I have managed to get to the grand old age of 27 while re...
A. 19 January 2012: It is easy if you keep trying. Sounds like you gave up a long time ago, because your thoughts keep going back to "I'm a virgin! She won't want to be with a virgin! She's not a virgin! She can't be a virgin! She's going to JUDGE ME!" And then the ... (read in full...)
Should I tell his fiance he slept with me?
Q. Two years ago I met a guy on holiday and slept with him. I was with my friends and he was with his girlfriend. Yes thats right people, his girlfriend! He befriended me and my group of friends and flirted with me from the start. Then one night, all ...
A. 19 January 2012: Block him and move on. She may know he's a ladies man already, and all it will demonstrate to her is that you deliberately slept with a guy who had a girlfriend. It says as much about you as about him, and as she's in love with him, she'll just ... (read in full...)
Dating for a year and b/f will not touch me! He says I am putting pressure on him
Q. I got myself into a pickle. I think I'm in love with this man I've been dating for a year. I'm 24 and he's 37. In this time we have only fooled around but never had sex. I will pleasure him but he has never touched me down there. He will ...
A. 19 January 2012: Good luck. Be brave, stay on message, tell him it's over and cut contact. It is not your responsibility to hold his hand now. Nor do you give him a farewell BJ. No boob-touching!... (read in full...)
Dating for a year and b/f will not touch me! He says I am putting pressure on him
Q. I got myself into a pickle. I think I'm in love with this man I've been dating for a year. I'm 24 and he's 37. In this time we have only fooled around but never had sex. I will pleasure him but he has never touched me down there. He will ...
A. 18 January 2012: 'I asked do you just want to be friends then? He was quiet but he reached over and started tracing his finger around my boob. I took that as a "no".'
That's not an answer. That's a guy who's trying to distract you. We have a 37 year old pres... (read in full...)
I'm engaged, but still in love with my ex who has got back in touch and wants to see me! Help!
Q. I'm in love with and engaged to a wonderful man. He is everything and more that I've ever wanted in a partner. It would take me centuries to share how amazing he is and how he worships the ground that my children and I walk on. But there's a problem ...
A. 18 January 2012: Oh, and be sure to tell your new wonderful man about this, so he can support you as you finally face the need for your own therapy and healing, okay?
Best wishes to you.... (read in full...)
I'm engaged, but still in love with my ex who has got back in touch and wants to see me! Help!
Q. I'm in love with and engaged to a wonderful man. He is everything and more that I've ever wanted in a partner. It would take me centuries to share how amazing he is and how he worships the ground that my children and I walk on. But there's a problem ...
A. 18 January 2012: Good for him for getting some help. Alas, it's no longer your concern or your responsibility to be his friend.
I know someone who has an abusive, narcissistic, deluded ex. She's a bit fragile, in terms of how she feels about herself. She's gorg... (read in full...)
I think I'm in love but he hasn't called me in a week
Q. So here is my problem. I think that I am in love. This makes absolutely no sense. Here is my story... I was in his class, he was my professor, I his student. There was some sexual comments made but never to the extent where someone would report it, ...
A. 18 January 2012: I know someone who is an assistant professor at a university and who doesn't teach every semester. This person still holds their rules and regulations to be binding, even in the 'off' semester. I think you are spending a lot of time fantasiz... (read in full...)
Should I accept my boyfriend's idea as a one-off or should I tell him it's not a good idea?
Q. So my boyfriend and I have been going out now for 4 years and everything is going great. He went to uni last September and I took a while to get used to it but after being apart then spending one month solid together and being apart we have ...
A. 18 January 2012: Don't do anything you really aren't fully comfortable with, especially threesomes, and especially as you have a history of low self-esteem.
Please take care and be sure you aren't with someone who is manipulating you because you are still unce... (read in full...)
He wants to propose in front of everyone!
Q. So me and my boyfriend are 3 and a half years apart. he asked me if he proposed to me what would i say? (he is older) so i said of course i would say yes. and he said he can't wait till he can do it infront of everyone! im really nervous. i dont ...
A. 18 January 2012: I guess maybe we really didn't understand what you were asking? I hope everything works out for you! Best wishes.... (read in full...)
Does he deserve a second chance after he lied about wearing a condom?
Q. I have been dating this guy for a couple of months. He's nice to me, although he has a bit of a problem telling the truth. He does not like wearing protection as he says he doesn't feel anything and the rubber irritates him. I finally agreed t...
A. 18 January 2012: I might consider warning other women about this guy. He sounds like he's likely to spread STDs and cause unwanted pregnancies. I know that would be hard to do but, um, eek, with a creep like him on the loose?
I hope everything goes well for you.... (read in full...)
Is masturbation worth doing?
Q. I'm 20 years old and I'm still a virgin in every way. Everyone I know masturbates,but for some reason that really freaks me out. The thought of it makes me feel guilty for some reason. How do you even do it? I know that sounds silly, but seriously. ...
A. 18 January 2012: I don't think you're silly. I think you're probably more normal that you realize. Many girls feel like you do. If you don't want to masturbate, don't! You don't have to apologize or explain to anyone.
That being said, I have a link for you to read... (read in full...)
A male virgin and a much younger and more experienced girl - potential humiliation or a great opportunity?
Q. Hello! This isn't the first time I've asked a question that is in some way related to this topic, but I hope it will be the last! First, some important background information. Somehow I have managed to get to the grand old age of 27 while re...
A. 17 January 2012: "I've enjoyed chatting with you very much. I'd like to get to know you better. Would you like to go out, for a cup of coffee? May I have your number?"
Can you manage that?... (read in full...)
He wants to propose in front of everyone!
Q. So me and my boyfriend are 3 and a half years apart. he asked me if he proposed to me what would i say? (he is older) so i said of course i would say yes. and he said he can't wait till he can do it infront of everyone! im really nervous. i dont ...
A. 17 January 2012: Are you shy or something? He's already asked you, in front of your parents, so why would it bother you if he asks you again in front of other people?... (read in full...)
I think I'm in love but he hasn't called me in a week
Q. So here is my problem. I think that I am in love. This makes absolutely no sense. Here is my story... I was in his class, he was my professor, I his student. There was some sexual comments made but never to the extent where someone would report it, ...
A. 17 January 2012: Does "he has a set life" mean he's married too?
Look, I'm sorry, but you got sexually involved with a guy who probably does this a lot. He's in a position that places him squarely in contact with loads of co-eds, many of whom are naive and not that... (read in full...)
He wants to propose in front of everyone!
Q. So me and my boyfriend are 3 and a half years apart. he asked me if he proposed to me what would i say? (he is older) so i said of course i would say yes. and he said he can't wait till he can do it infront of everyone! im really nervous. i dont ...
A. 17 January 2012: He's basically already proposed and you've accepted; the rest is just acting the scenes of a play.
Are you sure you are really ready for this as you are here asking this question? If you need to look to others to validate or confirm what your reac... (read in full...)
Should I accept my boyfriend's idea as a one-off or should I tell him it's not a good idea?
Q. So my boyfriend and I have been going out now for 4 years and everything is going great. He went to uni last September and I took a while to get used to it but after being apart then spending one month solid together and being apart we have ...
A. 17 January 2012: Oh, and perhaps part of your personal growth and development may be that you need to experience life without a boyfriend for a while, to see what flirting and 'feeling sexy' feels like. Just don't go crazy and sleep with every guy who put his hands ... (read in full...)
Should I accept my boyfriend's idea as a one-off or should I tell him it's not a good idea?
Q. So my boyfriend and I have been going out now for 4 years and everything is going great. He went to uni last September and I took a while to get used to it but after being apart then spending one month solid together and being apart we have ...
A. 17 January 2012: I think going from zero self-confidence and feeling rubbish about yourself with no experience with the opposite sex, not even flirting, and going to a threesome in the next is a very bad idea.
Get more comfortable in your skin and in yourself befo... (read in full...)
Does he deserve a second chance after he lied about wearing a condom?
Q. I have been dating this guy for a couple of months. He's nice to me, although he has a bit of a problem telling the truth. He does not like wearing protection as he says he doesn't feel anything and the rubber irritates him. I finally agreed t...
A. 17 January 2012: Nope! He's done. He put his sexual pleasure ahead of your very valid concerns about pregnancy. I'd be worried about STDs too. Buh-bye, selfish guy. Maybe the next time he won't be so cavalier with another girl's health and future.... (read in full...)
A male virgin and a much younger and more experienced girl - potential humiliation or a great opportunity?
Q. Hello! This isn't the first time I've asked a question that is in some way related to this topic, but I hope it will be the last! First, some important background information. Somehow I have managed to get to the grand old age of 27 while re...
A. 17 January 2012: "I'm stuck between my morals and my penis." No, actually, you are trapped by your own shyness and social anxiety disorder. Deal with that first. The rest will follow.
Instead of analyzing how to lose your virginity, analyze how to lose the soci... (read in full...)
| *isha-1's friends
These are mutual friends, so *isha-1 has
added them and they have added *isha-1!
|
![[?]BitterSweetFinale;[?] agony aunt](/avatars/7bb1e9ea-6c2f-43b8-a4f7-0635b7eff08c.png){kind=small}
