My boyfriend wants a threesome after watching my friend and I drunkenly make out
Q. Earlier this year I got pregnant. I didnt know I was pregnant at the time and had a surgery. Because of this, the doctors said there was a 50/50 chance something would be wrong with the baby cos of all the drugs, morphine etc but they could not be ...
A. 10 November 2015: Let's get the big issue out of the way:
You didn't cheat on your boyfriend, and any guilt you feel that may cause you to feel obligated about granting your bf's wishes OR looking the other way while he cheats on you is unwarranted.
In fact... (read in full...)
Is it wrong to have deal breakers in relationships?
Q. My Boyfriend and I have been together for a year. Recently we talked about deal breakers. Both of us agreed cheating is a deal breaker. Then I told him if he ever took drugs at a party it'd be a deal breaker for me. I did not know he used to do ...
A. 10 November 2015: Actually, there *must* be dealbreakers even more than just cheating! And he has them, no matter what he says to you.
Some people don't know what their dealbreakers are until they're confronted with them (i.e. a guy who texts constantly with oth... (read in full...)
Am I horribly inconsiderate for not being ready when my bf expects me to be?
Q. Hi, we have more problems than this in our relationship and maybe it's doomed but I'd just like to get some outside perspective on this one issue. This has happened two or more times already, two times recently. One early evening he drove an hour to ...
A. 10 November 2015: It's simple. If you and he talk about a time he's picking you up to go out, you should be ready by that time unless there's an emergency, in which case you call or text him that something came up. That's courtesy.
Let me put it to you another ... (read in full...)
I'm desperate for women to notice me
Q. Hi, I am a 22 year old virgin and have spent years trying to make myself attractive enough to be able to have sex. Ive transformed the way I look, started going to school parties,even started drinking at them even though I dont like alcohol. Im n...
A. 9 November 2015: I read your entire message and was prepared to help steer you until I read this:
You said: " I wont use prostitutes and have written off long term relationships until I attract, seduce, have sex with enough women to make me feel desirabl... (read in full...)
As a male inexperienced virgin who feels socially awkward - Should I pay a sex worker to have sex with me for my first time?
Q. Hello I'm a male virgin who's never even kissed a girl nor have I been on a date or had a girlfriend. I'm not particularly good looking and I'm very socially awkward. I figure having no clue about the opposite sex would be a massive turn off....
A. 3 November 2015: I am so happy you wrote here! My heart goes out to you.
You are at a crossroads. What is sex to you? What is intimacy to you? A quick shaft in which the end result is nothing in which your hand can't give you?
A prostitute won't give you w... (read in full...)
We are looking to move in together, yet he won't be flexible! What should I do?
Q. Dear Cupid, I have been in a long distance relationship for two years. I am 33, he is 30 and we live 3 hours apart. We are looking to move in together. He wants me to move to his house which is in the countryside. There aren't any jo...
A. 30 October 2015: Honestly? Your mom should take precedence over him. I have an elderly widowed mom who I live 12 hours away from, and it's awful enough as it is, even knowing my brother lives in town with her, so I know she's being taken care of.
This is also ... (read in full...)
Should I stick by Him? Despite the rumours about him?
Q. Basically, there's a guy who I started recently seeing, what it is , is that we live in a small town so everyone knows each other business. Recently some rumours about him have come out such as he's been married a few times, controlling person a...
A. 29 October 2015: You can look up his marriage history online! Do a background check on him, and that should tell you whether or not that rumor is true.
Most people leave a digital footprint online as well. Looking him up by name, email address, internet... (read in full...)
Will I ever love a man again as much as I loved my first Bf?
Q. I just broke up w/my 1st "real" boyfriend for whom I wanted to give the world to, I eventually found out he didn't care for me that much (he told me how much he loved, but I could feel in my gut he wasn't that in love), so knowing this would tear me ...
A. 29 October 2015: Oh boy. I thought this may be the case. I'm going to tell you a few things that I hope will help you in your next relationship, because I see some behavior that may sabotage your future interactions with guys.
If we turned this around, and inst... (read in full...)
I am the parent to my teen brother - our parents are deceased. My brother is now 14. How do I raise and discuss talking about sex and all that to him?
Q. When i was 16 i held my baby brother in my arms and said to dad "god he's small, i'm not baby sitting". Well i think i changed his nappies more times then mum used to. Honestly a few years later when i went off to university my biggest joy coming h...
A. 28 October 2015: Bodily fluids are a tough discussion even for parents to have with their kids. Like the one woman with teenage kids said in Bridesmaids "I cracked a blanket in half!". I'm a mom to a 15 year old son, and I get it, trust me!
You need to do two t... (read in full...)
Will I ever love a man again as much as I loved my first Bf?
Q. I just broke up w/my 1st "real" boyfriend for whom I wanted to give the world to, I eventually found out he didn't care for me that much (he told me how much he loved, but I could feel in my gut he wasn't that in love), so knowing this would tear me ...
A. 28 October 2015: It's good that you're not in contact with your ex.
And there's a distinction between "Will I ever love a man again as much as I loved my first BF" and "Will I ever love a man again LIKE I loved my first BF".
The answer to "Will I ever love a ma... (read in full...)
Should I arrive as soon as the party starts? Or should I arrive at a time that is normal for me?
Q. Hello. My boyfriend and his friends are throwing a very nice party in a couple of weeks. My boyfriend and I will be arriving separately. He with his friends and me with mine. The party starts at 10. Should I be there as soon as it starts like a...
A. 28 October 2015: I think I'm slightly confused. It may be a weakness of the typed word versus the spoken word, but it felt to me like there may be some friction between you and your boyfriend involved with this party.
I say that because you made the comment ... (read in full...)
Two years into a LDR and now I've cheated. What should I do now?
Q. Hi there this is the first time I doing this. I'm in a difficult situation right now, and I really don't know what to do. I've been in a long distant relationship for almost 2 years and I feel like things are starting to become dull between me and ...
A. 28 October 2015: It's time to end things with the LDR. People weren't made to have indefinite phone-in relationships for years with zero end in sight, and it's tough for even the ones that are temporary to weather the storm.
LDR's with the best chance for maki... (read in full...)
Why does my married lover remain with his wife if they've stopped sexual relations with each other?
Q. Been with my married lover for a few years now and the other night I asked him if he was sleeping with his wife? He didn't like me asking because I have kept mentioning it, anyway he said he didn't and if he was to cuddle his wife she would be ...
A. 28 October 2015: There's a big reason why he didn't like your question, and it's because in order to betray his wife, the one he's vowed to love, the woman for which he's built an entire life together with, he *has* to compartmentalize his life. When he's with you, ... (read in full...)
Is he telling the truth? Why is there a porn site on his phone history?
Q. Hi I wonder if you can help me with something. My boyfriend who I don't live with yet has a porn site showing on his phone history. I was looking up something yesterday on his phone not thinking for one moment that there would be anything like th...
A. 28 October 2015: I think pornhub is the most popular website. Your boyfriend uses it like you use a vibrator (if you do, which I highly recommend!).
It's private and doesn't mean he's with someone else or is not happy with you. It means he's using random i... (read in full...)
The worst sex I've ever had! What should I do?
Q. Help!!! I'm stuck in a rut with my sex life. I became sexually active at fifteen and have had a few sexual partners since. I've now been with my current boyfriend for 13 months and we have the worst sex life I've ever had. I've tried everything to ...
A. 26 October 2015: Hah! What a crock!
This guy telling *you* that he gets self-conscious about "being sweaty" on top of you ranks up there with "Honey, you fold clothes so much better than I do" or "I always feel weird vacuuming because I don't know if my carpet l... (read in full...)
I do not want to be hurt again by my first love. Any words of wisdom, please?
Q. I have not long met up again with my first love. It was passionate buthe ended up really hurting me. We separated for over 20yrs and I have a grown family. We linked again a few months ago and the chemistry was still there. A few months later be...
A. 25 October 2015: I think that you're really hurting both the current relationship you're in, and more importantly, you're hurting the children you've failed to acknowledge in this dream world you're living in with this "first love".
Putting aside the simple f... (read in full...)
Do you think I should tell my husbands boss to mind her own business?
Q. Dear cupid, Do you think I should tell my husbands boss to mind her own business? My husband who is a licensed RN took a school nurse job that pays 20 grand lower than his market value than he would be making in most other nursing jobs. To ...
A. 24 October 2015: Yikes - just saw your reply.
If his working two jobs still isn't covering your mortgage and you're draining your savings to pay it, then you REALLY need to start bringing in some income too!!!
To be really old-fashioned, there are two ways to ... (read in full...)
Do you think I should tell my husbands boss to mind her own business?
Q. Dear cupid, Do you think I should tell my husbands boss to mind her own business? My husband who is a licensed RN took a school nurse job that pays 20 grand lower than his market value than he would be making in most other nursing jobs. To ...
A. 24 October 2015: Uhh, that's a big huge *NO* to calling his boss. Seriously, the OPPOSITE of wanting your husband to "man up" would be for you to call HIS boss as if your husband were a second grader and you are calling to reprimand his elementary school teacher ... (read in full...)
How do black people find positivity in a world that seems to hate them?
Q. I'm black and every week I come across a video or article that commentators summarize as "black people are savage, Africans are worthless and the worst thing on the planet". I want to know how other black people find positivity in a world that hates ...
A. 23 October 2015: I think black people are beautiful! Don't get swept up in the divisive narrative that people on all sides of the racial and political spectrum use to further their own selfish interests. The world certainly does not hate you. White people don't ... (read in full...)
I surprised him by doing the housework but he reduced me to tears. Is this guy worth being with?
Q. I have been with my boyfriend for 8 months. Last night I went over to his house but got there an hour before he did. The house was a mess with dishes and dirty laundry everywhere so I thought as a surprise before he comes home I would clean. (as a ...
A. 23 October 2015: Hello again! I like getting questions from people like you who has come for advice from us on a regular basis, and even better has followed up with what happened or more of your thoughts! So it's good to have you back!
Is this guy the "ethnici... (read in full...)
Is the wife really accident prone or trying to assault the husband?
Q. Wife hits me 3 times in groin with point-point accuracy but says they're all accidents. 1. Wife wakes up and tries to get blanket from husband who's weight prevents her from getting blanket. Wife then does an open-palm strike through the blan...
A. 23 October 2015: Some people are restless sleepers! I don't think the husband is stealing the blanket on purpose! Maybe one thing to do is to get a bigger blanket! Or, if it's really bad and he suffers from PTSD or something that makes him unusually restless, ... (read in full...)
My boyfriend's stomach is coming between us
Q. I met a guy of 40 on a dating site we have been dating 6 months. He is about to complete his divorce and has two children under 8. His wife left him two years ago and things are amicable. If I have a future will I be expected to share my house w...
A. 23 October 2015: The two of you are incompatible. There's nothing shallow about it. We're not talking about a couple who has married and time has aged them. We're talking you aren't attracted to him from the start, and there are fundamental differences in how you ... (read in full...)
My ex's new girlfriend is out to get me!
Q. Since my ex split up with me back in March and went straight with another woman, this girl has done nothing but try and wind me up. Ive let them get on with things, I never publicly slated her or tried to split them up even though on this inside I ...
A. 22 October 2015: The question is - why have you given this woman permission to hurt you?? You're embarrassed you spent so much time with your ex, and you've moved on with a new relationship, right? Not only that, but you say that his life has tanked and yours has ... (read in full...)
Is the wife really accident prone or trying to assault the husband?
Q. Wife hits me 3 times in groin with point-point accuracy but says they're all accidents. 1. Wife wakes up and tries to get blanket from husband who's weight prevents her from getting blanket. Wife then does an open-palm strike through the blan...
A. 21 October 2015: I don't think it's funny at *all*.
They are absolutely positively NOT accidents, and you should have let the police be called.
She's hitting you there ON PURPOSE, and then is taking advantage of the double standard which shames a guy from admit... (read in full...)
How can I dress to hide my muscular legs?
Q. Do you guys think my body type is weird? I'm around 5 ft. 105 pounds, I'm very athletic so I have muscular thighs and I have a decent sized butt, all muscle and toned. I'm a double zero and have a 4 pack. My legs are longer and I have a short torso ...
A. 21 October 2015: Your body type is NOT WEIRD!!! You have the body people envy! Trust me - next time the Summer or Winter Olympics are held, watch it in a sports bar with a group of people, and you'll hear admiration for athletic and muscular bodies over and over ... (read in full...)
I caught my girlfriend lying twice about where she spent the night
Q. Hello everyone, so i am currently on a break with my gf because she lied to me twice in a row. However, with all this halloweens parties coming up that we had planned to go together it seems like added pressure to end the break faster. What ha...
A. 21 October 2015: YIKES! Hold the phone here!
She goes out with her friends, and your response is to go STALK her to her house?! Demanding receipts, interviewing her friends, monitoring how often she goes out, expecting a "check-in" text or call whenever she gets... (read in full...)
My boyfriend of one year is pushing to get married and I'm not ready for it!
Q. My boyfriend and I have been dating for a year. I am 32 and he is 37. Neither of us have been married or have children.We live about 40 mins from one another. Here is the problem. He has been putting the pressure on me very heavy the last 4-5 ...
A. 20 October 2015: It's not often that I see that the GUY is more scared of running out a biological clock than the girl is.
First of all, you're definitely in the right to slow him down. One year isn't that long, and while it's not unheard of to get engaged ... (read in full...)
My piano teacher and I are close, but is it too close?
Q. My teacher and I are very close. He always tells me I'm his favorite student and we always joke and have interesting sometimes inappropriate conversations. He told me I'm beautiful, he always gets upset when other people hit on me. And he has hugged ...
A. 20 October 2015: Yikes, RED FLAG!!!!!
This guy is GROOMING you. He is crossing the line on many fronts, and especially with the beautiful comments and the touching. I took years of piano lessons, and there is ZERO reason for any piano teacher to touch you. No... (read in full...)
How will it effect me if I watch my wife giving birth?
Q. My wife is extreme gorgeous and she is currently 8 months pregnant with our first child. I will admit I was kinda worried about the whole pregnancy thing and how it would effect our sex life but it has only made it better. I am very turned on with ...
A. 20 October 2015: First thing's first - don't overthink everything! It's like when you take a big pill and you psych yourself up that you'll gag on it, and you end up doing just that because you thought about it too much.
Same here! First of all, she's not goin... (read in full...)
Why did my ex give up on me? Why does he do things with his fiance that he refused to do with me?
Q. We dated for three years. He went through some tough times and I was always by his side, helping him and never leaving him. We went through a bad patch, argued every day. He said we needed a short break. He said he will always love me and be there...
A. 20 October 2015: It's pretty obvious what happened. A relationship CANNOT withstand arguing, strife, and stress for days on end. That means that your relationship was not compatible. All the "we'll always have a bond", "short break", and "he'll love you and be ... (read in full...)
Should I meet my boyfriend's siblings now or later?
Q. My bf and I have been dating for 3 months. And we get along very well, and he understands me. I have social anxiety, and although I am capable of going outside and being around people. When its one on one or a group, I get very nervous and don't ...
A. 18 October 2015: I think you should do it! It would be a really good thing for you to do. As WiseOwlE said, talking to your therapist prior to it would be helpful, as he or she can give you some tips to cope and turn it into something really good.
If your boy... (read in full...)
How can I feel like less of a failure towards my Gf?
Q. I've been with my S/O for five months now and recently found out that this whole time I haven't made her cum. She took my virginity so I understand that I am not super experienced bUT I can't help to feel useless and like a failure. She says ...
A. 17 October 2015: It takes time! You're not the only one who's inexperienced. She's even more so because she most likely isn't making herself orgasm any more than you can.
As far as sex is concerned, less than a third of women (the statistic is about 1/4th of... (read in full...)
Why do we need to compare breast sizes? And what breasts do men want?
Q. I often see posts on here from women with smaller breasts who feel that they wished they had larger breasts. Whilst I believe all Women should be encouraged to feel good about their bodies I often feel disheartened by the responses that put down lar...
A. 17 October 2015: Just be glad you're not a guy who worries about penis size! Women can get surgery if they don't like how they look. It's not so easy for a guy to allow "the knife" anywhere near their manhood.
Also, don't worry about how guys see you anyways!... (read in full...)
In this situation can I be added to the lease or not?
Q. My bf and I want to move in together. He is 26 and I'm 22. He has a job and I am in college, and looking for jobs. He lives an hr away from me, so I would be moving to his area. I will be finding a job once we live there, since I will be closer and ...
A. 17 October 2015: I think you should be asking many more questions than simply "Should I be on the lease?" because first, you must know the rules of where your BF is staying. They may not allow move-ins without their approval and adding onto their lease.
Some ... (read in full...)
I broke up with her and have some regrets.
Q. I will try to make this short. I am 28 years old and recently got out of 5 years serious LTR(lived in together for 5 years). Problem is I was never very much in love with her to start with. I deeply cared about her but never felt that attraction ...
A. 17 October 2015: The other aunts have given you great advice. I have a different take on this:
I think what you're doing to her NOW is worse than what you were doing when you were with her. You may have formally broken up with her, but you haven't let her go. ... (read in full...)
Do all men stare at other women? Is it natural?
Q. Hi I have been with my boyfriend for almost 2 years we are happy we live together and never argue there's just one problem his interest in other women I know all men look but he stares for ages I have told him many times how this upsets me but he ...
A. 17 October 2015: I don't mean to sound crude, but in my opinion, this is the best analogy:
You ask "Do all men stare at other women? Is it natural?"
I'll respond with another question.
"Do all men scratch their testicles and adjust themselves? Is it natur... (read in full...)
He goes too deep, how can I make it easier?
Q. I hope someone can help. My husband and I have hot sessions in the bed room department but my main issue is getting him to come. He prefers to be mega deep penetrating but I find it really uncomfortable. Does anyone have any advice on how to ...
A. 13 October 2015: The glans of the penis is the primary seat of orgasm for the guy, so going mega-deep isn't that necessary. You could practice your kegels and grip really hard onto him as he's inside you. You should also dictate how deep he goes, because if he's ... (read in full...)
I'm heartbroken over my married man!
Q. I have been having an affair with a married coworker for two years...the feelings are strong and even though we knew it was wrong we always kept going back to each other. I found out last month from a mutual friend that his plan to adopt a baby ...
A. 13 October 2015: I think you need to think twice before revenge calling the guy's wife for two reasons:
1. Are you going to tell on yourself as well as this guy for "revenge"? You're just as guilty as he is, knowingly going for a married man and being his will... (read in full...)
I hate my husband for throwing me a suprise party!
Q. My idiot husband threw me a suprise 50th birthday party "knowing full well" that I dispise parties of anykind. I had to lie to everyone and pretend that I was enjoying it, while secretly dispising the whole thing. It has been months and I still have ...
A. 13 October 2015: Before I tell you what I think, I'll preface this with telling you that I get how you feel! I hate birthday parties as well, either for myself or others. I go of course to other people's because I do love people, and I'm an outgoing person, but a ... (read in full...)
Men act like they like me but turn me down when I ask them out
Q. I keep asking guys out that act like they have feelings for me but they keep turning me down and I can't take it. What am I doing wrong?...
A. 12 October 2015: Where are you when you are asking these guys out?? Where are you when they act like they like you? Sometimes, if you're talking about the club or a bar or at a drunken party, no one's being serious, and most of the time it's casual, especially if ... (read in full...)
Is sexting ok when you are in a relationship?
Q. It was a two month relationship. I found him sexting other women and I lost it,cried the whole night etc,didn't let him sleep but the lies he told the other woman was devastating. I have learnt my lesson to leave if anything like this happens ...
A. 12 October 2015: I think you chose a cheating lying asshat as your first relationship. It's NEVER okay to sext others while you're in a relationship, and I don't suggest sexting anyway, as words and pictures never go away.... (read in full...)
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