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... Send *rank B Kermit a private message | | | *rank B Kermit's profile:Frank Kermit, MA is an Expert Relationship and Dating Coach. He is a Best Selling Author, educator, and regular media correspondent.
He teaches men and women about their emotional needs, how to address each others emotional needs, to be applied to ongoing loving relationships. In 2011, Frank completed an Advanced Certificate in Trauma Counseling and in 2014 completed a certificate in Hypnotherapy.
Frank Kermit has a newsletters that the public can sign up for:
http://www.franktalks.com/newsletter/ (upcoming media spots)
and when you sign up, you get a 400+ page ebook for free (a collection of 100 of Frank's best articles)
Frank answers public questions on dearcupid.org when and IF he has the time. Please understand that Frank makes a professional living through his Date Coaching, and therefore his private paying clients must come first. Frank does not answer private questions received on dearcupid.org unless you want to hire him for some private one on one coaching via skype or over the phone. You can learn more about Frank's Coaching services at www.franktalks.com/
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| Latest articles: Off Limits Dating
No replies yet... 18 September 2013: Is Someone Off Limits for Dating? By Frank Kermit ND, Relationships Mastering the art of dating requires a number of skills such as being socially calibrated, effective communication and knowing what you want. One of the areas that comes up for ...
How to Deal with a Toxic Person
No replies yet... 18 September 2013: The Best Way To Deal With Toxic People By Frank Kermit ND, Relationships Toxic people are defined in this article as people who lack the capacity to reason, or people have the capacity to reason but just do not want to reason with you. In t...
A Broken Engagement is Better Than A Happy Divorce
No replies yet... 31 August 2013: A Broken Engagement is Better Than A Happy Divorce By Frank Kermit ND, Relationships One of the ironies of couples counseling that I often find myself doing is taking the couple through the pre-marital coaching process when they may already be...
A Frank Comment on Miley Cyrus
This question has 6 answers by readers of DearCupid.ORG.
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31 August 2013: A Frank Comment On Miley Cyrus By Frank Kermit ND, Relationships I do not normally comment on the antics of popular culture, as so much of what we see of movies and TV are fiction based romances and relationships. I tried my best to stay fo...
The Wedding Speech
No replies yet... 26 July 2013: The Wedding Speech Remember this day, your wedding day. Not for the dresses and suits, not for the extravagance, nor the dinner and dancing, but remember your wedding day because of the reasons you chose to marry your spouse. Remember who is it that...
Sexually Incompatible Couples
No replies yet... 19 July 2013: Sexually Incompatible Couples Sex is not the most important thing in a relationship. However, couples who love each other dearly and connect on so many levels, but whom are sexually incompatible tend to find that sex can be at the core of a numb...
Separation and Dating, Part 2 of 2
No replies yet... 28 June 2013: Separation and Dating, Part 2 of 2 Separation does not automatically lead to divorce unless you let it. It is up to you and your partner to put in the work so that it does not happen. In the event you are the only one trying to work on yourself and ...
Separation and Dating Part 1 of 2
No replies yet... 22 June 2013: Separation and Dating Part 1 of 2 One of the most damaging actions an individual can take is to start dating someone new when going through a separation with their serious long term partner (spouse, common-law partner or a defacto-union). When I use ...
The Frank Break Up Formula
No replies yet... 14 June 2013: The Frank Break Up Formula By Frank Kermit ND, Relationships Breaking up with someone is rarely an enjoyable or pleasant experience. In fact, there are those individuals who stay in less than satisfying relationships, and even can go all the ...
The Frank Romance Formula part 3 of 3
No replies yet... 8 June 2013: The Frank Romance Formula Part 3 By Frank Kermit ND, Relationships Continued from last article: The Frank Romance Formula is: A. (Stimulation of the 5 senses) + B. (Addressing the emotional needs of that person) + C. (Sensual/Sexual Contex...
The Frank Romance Formula Part 2 of 3
No replies yet... 3 June 2013: The Frank Romance Formula Part 2 By Frank Kermit ND, Relationships Continued from last article: The Frank Romance Formula is: A. (Stimulation of the 5 senses) + B. (Addressing the emotional needs of that person) + C. (Sensual/Sexual Contex...
The Secret Of Seduction is that it Happens in the Future
This question has 2 answers by readers of DearCupid.ORG.
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3 May 2013: The Secret Of Seduction is that it Happens in the Future By Frank Kermit ND, Relationships The future is where actual seduction takes place. That is the key to seduction. It has very little to do with turning someone on when you see them. I...
The S.L.A.P. Theory Of Life Lessons
This question has 1 answer by a reader of DearCupid.ORG.
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27 April 2013: The S.L.A.P. Theory Of Life Lessons By Frank Kermit ND, Relationships Sometimes life will slap you down when it has a lesson to teach you. For some people, the slap may be a light swat, and for others the slap has to be a severe smack down. ...
Dating With Disabilities
No replies yet... 5 April 2013: Dating With Disabilities by Frank Kermit ND, Relationships I once went on a date with a woman that had severe food allergies. We went out to a movie and I wished she had told me ahead of time. Although she mentioned that she was deathly all...
Rejection: The Worst Best Thing That Can Ever Happen
No replies yet... 21 March 2013: Rejection: The Worst Best Thing That Can Ever Happen By Frank Kermit ND, Relationships Rejection is the worst best thing that can ever happen to you. Managing rejection is a necessary part in managing your love life. Over the course of your ...
Things they do not tell you about having kids
This question has 2 answers by readers of DearCupid.ORG.
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15 March 2013: Things They Do Not Tell You About Having Kids By Frank Kermit ND, Relationships I always try to be very practical and realistic in my articles. This can come across very negative, given that my topic is Relationships (and all things relative...
When Friendship Is Meaningless
No replies yet... 8 March 2013: Friendship Is Meaningless Stop Hanging Out With Friends Who Sexually Reject You By Frank Kermit ND, Relationships Friendship is meaningless. There I said it. Now before you shoot one of your nasty emails to the editor, actually read this colum...
Who Cares What People Think? Depends...
This question has 1 answer by a reader of DearCupid.ORG.
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1 March 2013: How Much Should You Care About What Other People Think? By Frank Kermit ND, Relationships T here will be times when we want to do something in our lives that is meaningful to us. It could be a decision related to abandoning education, wh...
Learn How to Choose the Right Fights!
No replies yet... 21 February 2013: Pick And Choose Your Fights By Frank Kermit ND, Relationships Fighting in relationships is normal. The issue is not whether you fight. The issue is HOW a couple fights. Do they talk out their disagreements? Do they wait until they are alon...
Starting Over After V-day?
No replies yet... 14 February 2013: Starting Over? By Frank Kermit ND, Relationships Valentine’s day can be a day of reckoning for some people. Meaning, the events leading up to, on the day of, and afterwards can really wreck your life. This is one of the reasons I often refer to...
A Relationship is: Acceptance at the Worst, Loving at the Best
No replies yet... 6 February 2013: A Relationship is: Acceptance at the Worst, Loving at the Best By Frank Kermit, Relationships At my weekly relationship workshop last Saturday I issued one of my famous “Frankisms” that seemed to really resonate with the attendees. I was trying...
Asking Hard Questions
No replies yet... 1 February 2013: Asking Hard Questions By Frank Kermit ND, Relationships When trying to decide if you should be committed to someone, moving in with someone, getting engaged, and getting married, each new transition brings about the unpleasant task of askin...
Ex Lovers and Weddings Do Not Mix
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24 January 2013: Ex Lovers and Weddings Do Not Mix By Frank Kermit, Relationships If you ever had sex with someone that is about to get married, and have been invited to the wedding, do not go. This is especially true if the spouse-to-be feels uncomfortable havi...
Couples in Transition: Monogamy and Non-monogamy
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16 January 2013: Couples in Transition: Monogamy and Non-monogamy By Frank Kermit ND, Relationships Couples who are experiencing a transition in the status of their relationship may sometimes look to explore new ways of redefining their sex lives b...
Common Sense For Common Scents By Frank Kermit, Relationships
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13 December 2012: Common Sense For Common Scents By Frank Kermit, Relationships As the holiday season approaches, invitations begin to swarm in for get-togethers from family, friends and even office parties. It is a time of people coming together, and in some ca...
Couples in Transition
No replies yet... 29 November 2012: Couples in Transition By Frank Kermit, Relationships When a couple is going through a change in the status of their relationship they are a couple in transition. This includes couples that are transitioning from monogamy to non-monogamy, from no...
Your Home Is Your Seduction
No replies yet... 15 November 2012: Your Home Is Your Seduction By Frank Kermit, Relationships Your date is coming over to your place! You have seen each other a couple of times already, but this is different. This is YOUR PLACE, not some coffee shop or movie theatre or restaur...
The Movie Of Your Life’s Journey
No replies yet... 6 November 2012: The Movie Of Your Life’s Journey By Frank Kermit, Relationships The movie of your life is how we each envision our lives unfolding throughout our life span. This concept goes beyond simple fantasizing of what your life would be like. Writing ...
What Love Masks by Frank Kermit
This question has 7 answers by readers of DearCupid.ORG.
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2 November 2012: What Love Masks By Frank Kermit, Relationships A mentor of mine taught me that love is not blind; it is just that categories are rigid. When you meet someone, you put that person in a category (lover, friend, temptation, fling, does-no...
The Chocolate Made It Too Much Work: An Article About EFT and Weight Loss
No replies yet... 2 November 2012: The Chocolate Made It Too Much Work An Article About EFT and Weight Loss I have a confession. I used to daydream about food. You know that point in the day when someone catches you; your head in your hands, that dreamy look on your face? If so...
Have You Tried NOT Dating Your Type?
No replies yet... 1 November 2012: Have You Tried NOT Dating Your Type? By Frank Kermit, Relationships We all have our “type”. By “type” I am referring to that type of person each of us is madly attracted too. Each of us has our preference of what we like, what turns us on, ...
Is there such a thing as Happily Single?
No replies yet... 19 October 2012: Is there such a thing as Happily Single? By Frank Kermit, Relationships Is being single really that bad? After all, when a person considers the amount of pain that a relationship or casual dating can cause, it may seem that just skipping the w...
Be Thankful For a Broken Heart
No replies yet... 11 October 2012: Be Thankful For A Broken Heart By Frank Kermit, Relationships Ok, I hate this. I really hate this part of the process. However, it is a necessary part of the process, and if I am expected to help encourage others to do it, first I have to demo...
Stop Talking About Your Ex On Dates!
No replies yet... 5 October 2012: Stop Talking So Much About Your Ex By Frank Kermit, Relationships So you are on a date with someone new. You are excited. You are nervous. You hope that this is finally going to be the one. You meet. So far, you both like what you see. This...
Dating in Social Circles
No replies yet... 29 September 2012: Dating In Social Circles By Frank Kermit, Relationships Dating can be tricky. Does the other person like you the way you think he or she might? Do you really like that person enough to get more serious, or do you want to keep it more casual a...
Frank Guide to Speed Dating
No replies yet... 21 September 2012: Frank Guide To Speed Dating By Frank Kermit, Relationships Every way to meet someone new is a good way. Though friends, through the Internet, blind dates, approaching someone you want to meet, at a workshop, matchmaking companies, business conv...
Relationship Goal Setting
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15 September 2012: Relationship Goal Setting By Frank Kermit, Relationships Setting goals in most areas of your life can be challenging. When it comes to relationships, there are even more challenges. Whereas in other areas of your life such as education, emplo...
Battling The Savior Complex in Relationships
No replies yet... 6 September 2012: Battling The Savior Complex By Frank Kermit, Relationships As children, many of us grew up on stories about the hero that saves a person, and in the process, earned the undying love and loyalty of the person saved so that the hero and that saved ...
Get Out Of Your Own Way!
No replies yet... 30 August 2012: Get Out Of Your Own Way By Frank Kermit, Relationships One of the biggest obstacles that a person can have as an obstruction on their path of finding happiness, peace and healing for their love life, is themselves. Although most people wou...
Your Choices Today Become The Past You Have To Share Tomorrow
No replies yet... 26 August 2012: Your Choices Today Become The Past You Have To Share Tomorrow By Frank Kermit, Relationships Young adults tend to discount how the choices they make today will impact their futures tomorrow. At least, when it comes to relationships. The bes...
Are You A Partner Or A Liability?
This question has 1 answer by a reader of DearCupid.ORG.
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17 August 2012: Are You A Partner Or A Liability? When it really is you and not them By Frank Kermit, Relationships “It’s not you, it’s me.” Have you ever heard that said to you when someone broke up with you? Have you ever been the one to use it when dump...
The 7 Weird Words That Help Define Relationships
No replies yet... 9 August 2012: The 7 Weird Words That Help Define Relationships By Frank Kermit, Relationships There are 7 certain words that catch many people off guard when it comes to relationships. They are: Lust, Love, Sex, Dating, Commitment, Marriage, and Monogamy. ...
Fear of Conflict Is Rooted in The Fear Of Loss.
No replies yet... 20 July 2012: Fear of Conflict Is Rooted in The Fear Of Loss By Frank Kermit, Relationships Are you too nice when it comes to relationships? Do you walk on eggshells because you do not want to upset your partner? Are you reluctant to enforce your bounda...
Re-Establishing Trust in a Relationship Article
This question has 2 answers by readers of DearCupid.ORG.
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12 July 2012: Broken Trust Takes More Than Time To Re-Establish By Frank Kermit, Relationships Trust is one of the most important components of a relationship. Love is a great start, but it takes more than loving someone, or being loved by someone, to make ...
Understanding Emotional Needs
This question has 2 answers by readers of DearCupid.ORG.
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4 July 2012: Understanding Emotional Needs: What We Respond To Versus What We Should Like By Frank Kermit, Relationships Emotional needs are about what a person responds to. It has nothing to do with what a person should like. We all should be attracte...
Red Flags: What To Watch Out For On A Date
No replies yet... 29 June 2012: Red Flags: What To Watch Out For On A Date By Frank Kermit, Relationships When you are on a date, and the person you are getting to know says or does something that triggers a well-honed instinct that you need to stop dating that person, you hav...
The Art of Storytelling on a Date
No replies yet... 25 June 2012: Art of Storytelling: Make or Break A Relationship Happy Ending By Frank Kermit, Relationships One of the challenges that people face when they go on dates is that they may not factor in that others will not understand what they are trying ...
Swinger Beginner Advice
No replies yet... 25 June 2012: Swinger Beginners: Keep it Out of the Work Place By Frank Kermit, Relationships Dear Frank, My husband and I recently returned from a business trip/vacation where a few of my husband's co-workers also brought their wives. We really hit it o...
When your Ex becomes a symbol and you can't get over it
No replies yet... 13 June 2012: When Your Ex Becomes A Symbol Relationship Symbolism of Why You Are Still Hooked By Frank Kermit, Relationships We are surrounded by the power of symbols. A symbol is more than just a design we recognize; symbols are a means of making meaning. ...
Ally Vs Enemy: Understanding The Emotional Needs of Men
No replies yet... 9 June 2012: Is She His Ally or His Enemy? Understanding The Emotional Needs of Men By Frank Kermit, Relationships The best way I know how to teach people about the emotional needs of men is to break it down to absolute fundamentals. If people can und...
Dating After A Break Up - Just How Long Should You Wait?
This question has 2 answers by readers of DearCupid.ORG.
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1 June 2012: Dating After Breaking Up? The Sooner The Better By Frank Kermit, Relationships “How much time should I wait before I start dating again?” is a common question that I get asked from someone that has just recently gotten dumped, and still sufferi...
Relationship Redemption: How To Forgive Yourself and Get Closure
This question has 2 answers by readers of DearCupid.ORG.
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23 May 2012: Relationship Redemption How To Forgive Yourself and Get Closure By Frank Kermit, Relationships We all make mistakes in life. If you have ever tried to get into a relationship, are in a relationship, or are recovering from a relationship, ...
Finding The Meaning Of Your Life And Relationships
No replies yet... 15 May 2012: The Meaning of your Relationships Starts With The Meaning Of Your Life By Frank Kermit, Relationships Contemplate your death. No seriously. In order to make meanings of your relationships past, present and those you will have in the futur...
The Mother-Lover Theory Understanding The Emotional Needs of Women
This question has 4 answers by readers of DearCupid.ORG.
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10 May 2012: The Mother-Lover Theory Understanding The Emotional Needs of Women By Frank Kermit, Relationships A woman can only play one of two roles in a man’s life. She is either his mother or his lover. She cannot be both. When a man addresses a wom...
Moving To The Next Level: Understanding The Hierarchy of Relationships
This question has 3 answers by readers of DearCupid.ORG.
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1 May 2012: Moving To The Next Level Understanding The Hierarchy of Relationships By Frank Kermit, Relationships One of the biggest mistakes people make in relationships is to promote someone up the hierarchy of commitment that has not really earned it. I...
Beware Your Friends when it comes to love
No replies yet... 15 April 2012: Beware Your Friends They May Not Want You To Be Loved By Frank Kermit, Relationships Mistakes Singles Make # 6… Seeking the approval of friends that influences your love life choices. Love may come and go, but a friendship can last a lifetim...
Are Relationships Worth The Risk?
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8 April 2012: Relationships = Risk But is it really worth it? By Frank Kermit, Relationships Given that there is so much risk in getting involved in relationships, or having sex for that matter, is it at all worth it to even bother? After all, a broken hear...
Tattoos and Relationships
This question has 4 answers by readers of DearCupid.ORG.
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24 March 2012: Beware The L-I-N-K Of (L)ove and (INK) By Frank Kermit, Relationships While at a coffee shop a few weeks ago, I met a tattoo artist. He had his son’s name tattooed on his hand, and being the ever-inquisitive one, I asked him about his profession...
Open Relationships and Infidelity
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17 March 2012: Open Relationships Do Not Always Stave Off Infidelity By Frank Kermit, Relationships Some people believe that one of the surest ways to guarantee fidelity is to only do open relationships. The premise is that people only cheat in monogamous ...
What is a Relationship?
No replies yet... 10 March 2012: What is a Relationship? Is best defined by what it’s NOT By Frank Kermit, Relationships Over the years, I have been asked a number of times “What is a Relationship?” This is a harder question to answer than most people think. In my experience,...
Engaged! Now what?
No replies yet... 19 February 2012: Pre Marital Disclosure What you don’t know, you must know By Frank Kermit, Relationships Valentines day has come and gone. Some relationships have started. Some relationships have ended, and some relationships have proceeded to the next le...
Making Monogamy Work
This question has 2 answers by readers of DearCupid.ORG.
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5 February 2012: Making Monogamy Work By Frank Kermit, Relationships Monogamy is easier than open relationships, because the rules are simpler...but the application of the rules of monogamy is not as easy. Monogamy works for monogamous people...however...
Single Parent Dating, Not Just a Single Issue
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3 February 2012: Single Parent Dating – More Than Just A Single Issue By Frank Kermit At least 40% of marriages end in divorce. Depending on the study you read, the percentage can be higher. Even though the break down of families continues, the drive that ma...
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I want a sexual relationship with my mother in-law! Has anyone experienced this?
Q. I've seen this topic brought up a few times, but I thought I'd ask advice from anyone here that might have experience on this. I know - this is horrible to say or think, but I really hope to make this work so spare me the preaching. I am extremely...
A. 27 February 2008: Grow Up. That is the best advice I can offer you.
I sincerely hope your wife leaves you before you have children with her.
Of all the women you could cheat with, your mother in law? There is something emotionally damaged about you.
-F... (read in full...)
Whatever happened to the days of romance?
Q. Whatever happened to those days of those true passionate romance? You know the ones like Romeo and Juliet. Their passion for each other was not only idyllic, but powerful and sexy. They never once hesitated in expressing and showing their love ...
A. 27 February 2008: Romance is for a woman to enjoy, as if fulfills an emotional need of women. A man that desires this much drama will come off as needy, and resulting in being deemed less attractive.
Next, the STORY of Romeo and Julliet, to my knowledge, is not H... (read in full...)
I've moved on but my ex wont leave me alone. How do I convince him without hurting him?
Q. Hi..i need help...i left my husband 5 months ago, i am now in a new relationship with another man, who happens to be a work college of my ex husband,i was with my husband for 7 yrs and have 2 children with him. My ex is saying that the man am with ...
A. 27 February 2008: Firstly, there is no way to NOT hurt his feelings in this.
Next, it sounds as if he believes the ONLY reason you left was because of this new relationship. If this is true, he is right. Your new man WILL not be something long term. If this sta... (read in full...)
Every time I watch our favourite TV shows memories of her keep buzzing through my head. How can I overcome this??
Q. I could use some advice from anyone who has been in a fairly long-term relationship before. I came out of a long-term relationship just over 6 months ago and I've found it very hard to get over (I didn't want it to end). Since then I can't enjoy th...
A. 26 February 2008: The way I overcame this is to create new memories to cambat the old ones.
Each time you do something that might make you remember her, do that event with new people...either on a date, or with a group of friends that you will have fun with.
... (read in full...)
How can I make our sex more entertaining??
Q. My boyfriend of one year always makes love to me twice or thrice per week and says am good. The only problem is we've been using the same style and i would like to make him feel good like he always does to me. What do i do?...
A. 26 February 2008: For his birthday or something to that effect, get him a gift certificate to a sex shop, and go with him there a few times so that it sparks ideas, and conversation topics.
-Frank B Kermit... (read in full...)
As long as she wasnt married yet, she was free game. Right?
Q. I was at my brothers house and met his wife's neice. She is 10 years younger than I am and was engaged to be married in 3 months. She has a daughter with her fiancee and they live together and have been together for about 7 years. The thing is, I ...
A. 26 February 2008: This is a very slippery slope.
Being in alternative relationships communities, it counts as "right" or "wrong" pending the intent.
If a couple is in an open relationship of sorts, and there is an expectation of being sexual with others (inc... (read in full...)
She went back to her abusive ex. How do I get her back?
Q. I met this girl on the internet. She is 28 divorced and has two boys. When i met her she said she came out of a abisive relationship that she was in for 4 yrs. I am 40 and have a son. I know i took some of the retionship for granted because she said ...
A. 26 February 2008: You do nothing.
First, WHY would you want a woman that would rather be in an abusive relationship than to be with you? Don't you see that her issues are deeper than you suspect? You are not her therapist, and are trying to be her savior. ... (read in full...)
How do you get your 'joy' back?
Q. What can I do to get my joy back? I know everyone goes through life's struggles and I think I've handled them well up to this point. But lately I've become so overwhelmed with life that I feel like I'm losing myself. I used to be so cheerful and ...
A. 26 February 2008: Well, it sounds as if you are exhausted. You have too many obligations put on you. Yes, respect and taking care of family is important, and I respect that value. But that does not mean you do everything yourself, it can mean that you make sure ... (read in full...)
I don't want my brother's friend to ask me out but I do want him to know I'm interested in him.
Q. There's this guy I'm really interested in being with, not right now cause I'm not ready. The thing is he's like my brother's best friend and I don't know if I'd be his type or not, but he's really hot and I could see it really going somewhere with ...
A. 26 February 2008: It sounds like you are playing games, and getting off on the drama of it all.
I think you just want to use him for attention. Why on earth would you want him to know you are into him, but not date him? What point could there be, other than you... (read in full...)
I'd like to get back together w/ my ex even though she cheated on me.
Q. My ex cheated on me with a womanizer. they were together for 8 months and then he cheated; everyone warned her but she wouldn't listen! I still have strong feelings for her, and (very illogical) would like to get back with her).. However, I don't...
A. 25 February 2008: Hi Tommy,
I got an email from her this morning, saying that she feels she can tell me anything, so that is good to hear.
Sorry, but I disagree. It sounds like she sees you as a friend, not a lover. She should not be telling you things about... (read in full...)
I love my sister-in-law, what should I do??
Q. I'm 18 years old and I fatasize over my 24 year old sister-in-law. Shes married to my 28 year old brother. I want her so bad and I don't know what to do about it. I think she likes me, but I don't really know. help! What should I do?...
A. 20 February 2008: You don't do anything. She is your sister in law.
Are there no other women you could be dating right now?
You don't control who you are attracted to, but you do control what fantasies you indulge in, and what actions you plan to take.
Star... (read in full...)
Should I risk my marriage for the girl at work??
Q. I'm a married man but there I'm tempted to cheat on my wife with a gorgeous brunette in my office. Shes cute, funny and has a gorgeous bum. The only problem she has a serious boyfriend and I'm married. She flirts with me and I flirt back, we h...
A. 20 February 2008: Should you risk your marriage?
No.
Start thinking with the smart head.
-Frank... (read in full...)
It was just a stupid kiss...
Q. I live with my boyfriend of 2 years, love him a lot, we've had our problems like everyone else. About a month ago I was extremely drunk and kissed another guy, not passionately just a drunken kiss, neither of us meant it and both feel really really ...
A. 19 February 2008: A relationship built on a lie is destined to crumble. Better you tell him, than he hears it from someone else, and he will.
I also suggest that you and your friends STOP DRINKING. Being drunk does not make it OK. It makes you all stupid a... (read in full...)
My bf is somewhat ugly and I'm not sure I fancy him. What to do?
Q. hello i am having a boyfriend problem.see i like him but hes a bit ugly i don't want to hurt his feelings but i don't think i fancy him ?? what shall i do?? ...
A. 17 February 2008: If you find him ugly, then why is he already your bf?
Sounds to me like you have been using him, and now that you are done using him, you are ready to break up with him, and just want us to give you the excuse you need.
Stop using him.
-F... (read in full...)
Ex wife wants me back and she has new child
Q. Please help. I am a 30 year old male who at the age of 12 fell in love with a girl, also 12. At 15 we started dating and 13 years later we were married with 3 kids. The relationship had its moments and to be honest the arguments were mainly over ...
A. 14 February 2008: In my Frank opinion, going back to your wife is the WRONG thing to do. She is still the same person she was when things ended. Now she has another man's child.
You made a huge error promising to give that child attention. That child is NOT your... (read in full...)
Staying with his sister every night.
Q. So my fiancee lives 4 hours away, his sister travels and sometimes ends up in the same city as him. Whenever his sister is in town, he stays with her at the hotel. I think the rationale is that since her sister's paying for the room anyhow, he ...
A. 14 February 2008: Are you sure it is his "sister"? Could he be cheating on you, and just tells you it is his sister? Have you met her yet?
Is it possible for you to attend these hotel visits with him?\
-Frank B Kermit... (read in full...)
Valentines day gift!
Q. Hi, me and my boyfriend have been going out for over a year, and i have no clue what to get him for valentines day and its in 2 days. I know I waited untill the last minuet but i was tring to find a great gift, but my plan back fired today! I really ...
A. 13 February 2008: You are 10-12 yrs old.
Forget buying him anything.
Build him a book mark, or something else hand made that he can use everyday so that he will think about you.
-Frank B Kermit... (read in full...)
Why is my old school friend chasing me on the net, he's married
Q. Okay, so this guy I've known since high school and fell in love with, but we only went on one date and slept in the same bed one night spooning, started AIMing me the other night. I haven't really talked to him in two years, and since then, he has ...
A. 13 February 2008: Why is he writing you?
1-To win a bet
2-To get sex from you.
If you want a deeper meaning, I would surmise that he is using the excuse of the bet to get to have sex with you.
You are being played by a married man.
-Frank B Kermit... (read in full...)
I finally got free.
Q. I finally broke up with my emotionally abusive ex. But why didn't I break up with him at the times where it was really ugly between us-like when he was being unreasonable and getting mad at me because I wouldn't smoke or get drunk (which I don't do ...
A. 13 February 2008: Hi there,
Good for you for being smart about leaving a bad relationship.
As for your question: So, why didn't I break up then when I was so unhappy?
In my philosophy, at the time, he (or the relationship elements) may have addressed your ... (read in full...)
I finally got free.
Q. I finally broke up with my emotionally abusive ex. But why didn't I break up with him at the times where it was really ugly between us-like when he was being unreasonable and getting mad at me because I wouldn't smoke or get drunk (which I don't do ...
A. 13 February 2008: Hi there,
Good for you for being smart about leaving a bad relationship.
As for your question: So, why didn't I break up then when I was so unhappy?
In my philosophy, at the time, he (or the relationship elements) may have addressed your ... (read in full...)
Would it be wrong to wish my ex "Happy Birthday"?
Q. I was wondering what you would do in this situation: I went out with a guy during January this year. He was my first boyfriend (I'm 18). We were strangers, but we worked at the same place, and he was the one who asked me out. A couple of weeks ...
A. 13 February 2008: It would not be wrong...but it would also NOT be smart.
He will most surely assume you want to get back with him. If this is not the case, do not lead him on, and thus no contact.
-Frank B Kermit
Seminar leader on the Emotional Needs of M... (read in full...)
My ex is having Sex with somebody knew. It's upsetting me and is making me feel VERY jealous. Any advice?
Q. I'm feeling jealous towards my ex. We've managed to be friends since we broke up nearly a year ago. Even though we are friends, I've never felt like I've truly gotten over her, even though we have both agreed that getting back together wouldn't be a ...
A. 13 February 2008: First, what are you doing keeping tabs on your ex? She is your ex, and there is no reason to be keeping track of who or what she is doing.
Next, are you in a position to move out and build your life? Maybe that is where you need to focus on... (read in full...)
Is it possible to be TOO nice to women?
Q. How do I avoid being nice towards women? I've had relationships but they always end in me getting dumped. My best friend says its because im too nice. what does he mean?...
A. 31 January 2008: Daniel said: Being nice is not the problem. Letting people walk over you is.
Frank: BINGO!
-Frank... (read in full...)
My ex wanted me back but wont give up her new guy. I feel like I'm being manipulated, what should I do?
Q. My ex broke up with me 2 months ago. It was mostly because I wasn't attentive enough. She started seeing someone else. I stayed away from her. I didn't call her at all. She called me after a month and told me she missed me. She told me she thinks ...
A. 31 January 2008: You are being played by her.
End all contact and move on.
-Frank B Kermit... (read in full...)
Would you allow your wife to have sex with another man?
Q. If you were unable to satisfy your wife sexually due to health problems, would it be ok to allow her to have sex with a person of your choice?...
A. 31 January 2008: I think you need to research this more.
I would suggest that you read everything you can on swinger culture, as you will be able to meet people in exactly your situation.
Yes, I do know people that have done it, BUT you really need to be clear... (read in full...)
Is it possible to be TOO nice to women?
Q. How do I avoid being nice towards women? I've had relationships but they always end in me getting dumped. My best friend says its because im too nice. what does he mean?...
A. 30 January 2008: It is possible to be too nice to anyone.
It is based on the idea that you let people take advantage of your good nature because you want them to like you. Also, it means you tolerate certain behaviors from women, that you would not tolerate... (read in full...)
Do I have a realistic plan?
Q. Ok. I'm 16, and yes sexually active. I'm on birth control, and were having unprotected sex, but he pulls out. My bf is 21. I graduate in a year and a half, when I'm seventeen. If I do happen to get pregnant I have it all planned out.. Just because ...
A. 18 January 2008: No, your plan is not realistic, and on some level, you already know it, otherwise you would not be asking.
As it is, your relationship with your bf might be illegal as you are a minor and he is not.
Have you considered that maybe, just mayb... (read in full...)
She's broken my heart. What can I do?
Q. I have a problem. I really, really, -REALLY- like this girl. I've known her for over a year, and we both admit we'd be great for each other. I've never felt any kind of close connection to anyone like I do with her. The only person who comes...
A. 11 January 2008: Look dude, if the only other girl that you know that would be of interest to you is her sister, then THAT is your real problem. You need to start making lots of new friends, instead of staying at home and waiting for her. This leads to being ... (read in full...)
Can I find love without sex?
Q. I desperately want love (no sex, just love)but, no one I've met wants one without the other. Everyone around me says I'm foolish for holding back and expecting someone to stay. So, please tell me, Am I a princess whose just kissed the wrong frogs ...
A. 10 January 2008: It is up to you to CHOOSE men that want the same things as you do.
If you want love, but not sex, then go hang out at places where guys who want to wait for sex too, would be hanging out.
-Frank B Kermit... (read in full...)
If you have a relationship with an former escort and due to financial issues she returns should you still see her whilst she is active or wait until she stops for good!
Q. Dear Cupid, I am a 34year old man, who met a 24 year old girl who told me she was a former escort. When we first met I knew her through a mutual friend we got on immmediately and enjoyed being in each others company. She when away for a year and t...
A. 10 January 2008: I find your story full of hypocrisy.
You say that you believe in commitment and such, yet you also admit to paying for sex yourself.
The way you actually are, and the way you see yourself are in conflict and it is for that reason you do no... (read in full...)
My first love left me after 3 yrs, saying she doesn't want lesbian relationships any longer. What can I do?
Q. i was in a lesbian relation-ship for 3yrs , and 3days ago , she told she doesnt want to be with me becuz she say its not right , she doesnt want to be with girls anymore ,she want to live her life the right way , and she said thats nothing i can do ...
A. 10 January 2008: For some lesbians, it is easier to conform and date men, especially if they want the traditional family structure. I believe that in the USA, it is easier to adopt and/or have children and family for straight couples, than gay couples, and this may ... (read in full...)
Which is hotter - blonde or brunette?
Q. A bit of a survey here... Are girls hotter as blondes? or brunettes? I would love to know your personal preferance... thnx xoxo ...
A. 10 January 2008: The hottest girl is the one that treats me the way I want to be treated.
-Frank B Kermit... (read in full...)
Do you think it's ok for me to let my wife have another guy as her best friend??
Q. I'm 32 and my wife is 28. My wife and a good friend of mine (male friend) are good friends. I think it would be safe to say that they are best friends (which is totally okay by me). My friends say I'm crazy to "be okay" with this. I disagree, ...
A. 10 January 2008: No, it is not OK. Seems odd to me.
For your friend to say it is also odd, he is trying to tell you something.
-Frank B Kermit... (read in full...)
How can I get her back once shes cleared her head??
Q. My girlfriend of several months has decided to take a break and needs some space. I was a rebound guy and we moved pretty fast, so this makes sense to me. But I am still interested, and wonder what I should do in the intern and how I might get her ...
A. 10 January 2008: The best way to cope is to START SEEING OTHER WOMEN.
When a partner asks for space, it is there way of saying:
"Find someone else, and dump me, because I haven't the heart to dump you first"
Being with someone they love is NOT a burden. It... (read in full...)
The 'space' my gf wants is doing my head in...how do I cope??
Q. My girlfriend 'needs space', 'a break'. Were not living together or see each other as often due to commitments. She can't cut down hers. There is no-one else apparently and so work and stress I guess is a factor. 'Space' can be days, weeks, mont...
A. 10 January 2008: The best way to cope is to START SEEING OTHER WOMEN.
When a partner asks for space, it is there way of saying:
"Find someone else, and dump me, because I haven't the heart to dump you first"
Being with someone they love is NOT a burden. ... (read in full...)
How can he expect me to be his rock when in fact I'm more like soft concrete?
Q. My partner’s divorce is just coming through. He is depressed and not very nice to my small son and I, sometimes. Everyone sees him as a lovely man and when we first started out I could talk to him about anything, he was my rock. Now it is my ...
A. 9 January 2008: Love is NOT enough. He is treating you like crap. He is treating your son like crap, and THAT is the biggest red flag of them all.
He is a man. He is the one to be YOUR rock, not the other way around. He needs a mommy, not a lover.
You ... (read in full...)
I will tell him as soon as I am certain of my pregnancy, but I do not know how, or if he will help me.
Q. I'm 17, and took a pregnancy test today and it said positive. What are the chances it's a false positive? I only took the test because the end of my last period was 40 days ago. Also my boobs are really sore and feel like they've grown, I've had ...
A. 9 January 2008: Tell him immediately. He needs as much time as he can get to absorb it.
It sounds like whether or not he is there, you are not ready to raise a child yourself. Do you have family to support you? Is adoption an option if abortion is not?
... (read in full...)
How does a female get in on the dating scene?
Q. How does a 26 year old female go about the scene of dating, relationships, and becoming intimate? It feels so late in the game!...
A. 9 January 2008: I know a number of women that were late bloomers. Don't worry too much, as you will get plenty of make up time.
For starters, start asking your friends if they know anyone that you would like, and ask them to bring those guys along when you meet... (read in full...)
Every time I make a suggestion, my boyfriend yells at me. If I do not, he is not pleased either. What am I doing wrong?
Q. I'm trying to make my 3-yr relationship with my b/f work out but at times he seems impossible to please. Some examples: We'll be driving in the car, and he'll tell me that I should look ahead and see if there's traffic coming on my side of the car, ...
A. 9 January 2008: Your bf is f*cked up. Why the hell are you with him? This WILL turn to physical violence.
You are doing NOTHING wrong. This is him, and only him, and he would treat anyone he is with like this.
Girl, RUN.
-Frank B Kermit... (read in full...)
If he's so attracted to me, why doesn't he want to get physical?
Q. I've been VERY close with my guy friend for about 5 months(we seen each other EVERY DAY and never tire!). We've talked about dating, or fooling around at least, but when the kiss that I expected NEVER came, I called him on it. (I've tried once ...
A. 9 January 2008: Well, it could be three things..
1-He is NOT really a ladies man, and might be gay, or a sex abuse victim, and sex for him is not a pleasant experience.
2-He is a player, and when a player finds a nice girl, he does not want to ruin her by bein... (read in full...)
Why did he bother texting me?
Q. My boyfriend split up with me on friday, blaming me for the majority of problems in his life, and being quite cruel about me as a person. I told him what I thought of what he said and left it at that. It is now tuesday and I get my first contact off ...
A. 9 January 2008: He sounds unstable, and potentially abusive. Also, he might just be texting you to line you up for the sex he misses (if you had sexual contact).
If you do let him back in, go slowly, as his behaviors could get violent. Blaming you for all his ... (read in full...)
She's broken my heart. What can I do?
Q. I have a problem. I really, really, -REALLY- like this girl. I've known her for over a year, and we both admit we'd be great for each other. I've never felt any kind of close connection to anyone like I do with her. The only person who comes...
A. 7 January 2008: First, whatever you do, do NOT become her therapist, and NEVER listen to her talk about her problems with you. That will end any chance of you dating her in the future.
Go out with other girls. She needs to see you as a desired and sexual m... (read in full...)
I'd like to get back together w/ my ex even though she cheated on me.
Q. My ex cheated on me with a womanizer. they were together for 8 months and then he cheated; everyone warned her but she wouldn't listen! I still have strong feelings for her, and (very illogical) would like to get back with her).. However, I don't...
A. 18 August 2007: It is OK to want her back, but it is not ok to take her back just because she asks.
The best way to play it cool is to play it honestly WITH A CHALLENGE.
Let her know that you "would" like her back, BUT she has to EARN your trust again. Sh... (read in full...)
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