A
male
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes:I'm a married man but there I'm tempted to cheat on my wife with a gorgeous brunette in my office.Shes cute, funny and has a gorgeous bum. The only problem she has a serious boyfriend and I'm married.She flirts with me and I flirt back, we have also suggested meeting each other in the toilets but neither of us have had the nerve to go through with it. Although once I did go and wait for her and she didn't turn up!Everything about her turns me on! We have spent a few lunchtimes together and I can tell there is loads of sexual tension between us but neither of us will make the first move.Should I risk my marriage for the girl with the gorgeous bum or try to act like we are just friends and forget about anything ever happening!
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at work, flirt, girl at work, married man Reply to this Question
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male
reader, anonymous, writes (20 February 2008): do your wife a favor and divorce her, she deserves better!
A
reader, anonymous, writes (20 February 2008): Once I got so sick of a dickhead, I told him I would meet him in the loos, said he should go first and I would join him later, so as to not alert suspicions;
I think he waited about 1/2 hour. Good staying power! When he returned and asked where had I got to, I simply replied,
yourv'e got to be joking, you didn't think I could be serious did you?! I was impressed that you stayed in the toilets as long as you did, you fool.
True story, and I laughed and laughed and laughed at him, also told everyone I knew that he was a dickhead!
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A
female
reader, asian tealeaf  +, writes (20 February 2008):
 i fell sorry for ur wife. the fact u went to the toilets to meet" miss gorgeous bum" is despicable. if u cant remain faithful then why dont u leave ur weife amicably and honorably. without cheating. u can just tell her ur not happy and u dont want to hurt her because u do caare for her. once u cheat on her u will scar her for life. is this what u want sir? to u enjoy inflicting gaping wounds upon people? love is pure. urs is tainted with want and lust. and perhaps u need to start goi ng home and stare at ur wifes bum and ask urself, is it just as gorgeous? if it is or more so, ravage her. and think of no one else but her. othertwise sir, ur a fool. and its well know women have sticky snares and are quite skilled in the art of seduction. dont let this chic ruin ur life. because in the end, u might sleep with her, but she wont marry u after.u need to understand the make up of women. its not too far fro men really. alpha women, in particular, only look to seek, and conquer and move on. ur just a toy to her. if ur an unusually handsome man she will see u as something she needs to have. it makes her feel like shes sexy, shes hot, she got u to screw her. ur just another notch under her belt.thers a saying, guys chase the women until they ( the guy) gets caught. ur playing into a womens game. man up grow some balls and start looking at ur wife and ask urself if shes sexy, if shes sultry? does she have evrything u want and need? if npot, let the poor dame go so she can find her liofe partner who will treat her lovingly and loyally. and u can go and sow ur royal oats with all the other douchebags u find have "sexy bums". grow up sir. theres already too many men and women in this life who do what u are doing. and worse. i hope u do not have any kids sir. because then id really be angry for the kind of example ur setting for tomorrows generation. too sad.
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A
male
reader, VincentMancini +, writes (20 February 2008):
 That girl is a c**t. She only wants to have sex with you so she can say that you came onto her...then when her "serious boyfriend" comes 'round all manners of stuff will happen with your wife. But I think it despicable that you would ever CONSIDER cheating on your wife...frankly I couldn't give a s**t.
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A
female
reader, sue88 +, writes (20 February 2008):
You're thinking about cheating on your wife, you can't love her that much can you? If it wasn't this girl from work it would be someone else. Is your marriage worth it? Is this girl worth it? Take a long hard think, weigh up the pro's and con's but always think before you act.Good lucksuex
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A
female
reader, O Connor  +, writes (20 February 2008):
 why dont you ask her gorgeous bum out for dinner? it seems to be the only thing your interested in. grow up and realise that the marriage that you have with your wife is worth more than a gorgeous bum. this girl in the office is not an object or a piece of meat, she is a girl that has a relationship with someone. start thinking with your head and not the less intelligent parts of your anatomy.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (20 February 2008): Dont be so selfish, think about your wife and your marriage here! Did you vows mean anything to you???It is fine to be attracted to someone else, but to be seriously thinking about acting upon your thoughts is evidence that you have marital problems.Why don't you firstly try and work these problems out with your wife, and then if that fails, and you become single, then you can think about seeing or having sex with someone else.Think about how you would feel if your wife was feeling like this about a man at work, or if she had gone to the toilets to meet someone for sex..............Not nice hey!
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A
female
reader, joby30 +, writes (20 February 2008):
 First of all mate don't listen to avonlady as it is not a good idea to do this. No harm done what a load of old pony''' when you married your wife it was death till you part does your wedding vows mean nothing to you if you do this and you get caught then on your head be it mate but i tell you now is it really worth all the heart ache you will cause not only you and your wife but also this unfortunate brunettes what about her partner and is there any kids involved here don't always think with your (bits down your trousers mate) it wont be worth losing everything you have for a fling that prob wont go anywhere take care and i hope it all works out for you in the end jobyxxxxxxx
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A
female
reader, mackadocous  +, writes (20 February 2008):
 Do NOT Cheat!!!!! I will say how you can flip this around though and this might seem crazy to say but all that flirting can open many door ways in your marriage. All the sexual tension can be carried over when you get home. You are looking at the other ladies bum, show you wife the exercises that will increase her bum size. The list goes on with what you can do with this situation and not cheat.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (20 February 2008): I know your wife and I am going to tell her about this.Did that scare you? Of course I don't know you, but you just got a small shock, so imagine how you will feel when she does find out. Perhaps she find find someone with a bigger ---- than you as opposed to someone with a cute bum as you say. Perhaps lavatory girl has herpes (what with the threesomes an all) and you could pass it to your wife.I know I am bad, but you are in need of a swift kick up the ----. Please forgive me for being so horrid, but if we all just took what we wanted and nobody had any self control the world would be a very sad place. Absolutely everyone has to make sacrifices and compromises in the name of things that are really worth it. Unless of course you don't want your wife, in which case leave her. Or do you think you should have both? For all you know Mrs Loo may be a trouble maker and make your life very very hard at work.On your death bed what are you likely to say? "I wish I had gone into the loos with lavatory girl" or "Thank God I have been loved all my life by my gorgeous wife and family". The last is the only one worth thinking of, but only if you can cut the mustard, otherwise you don't deserve it.I know you are only being human and I am being very harsh, I do understand how you feel, high sexual excitement can be a big diversion and a much bigger destroyer than poeple think. When you look at the girl, just imagine the herpes! Hee hee.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (20 February 2008):
Hey there.
There is this guy I know in the same age bracket as you.
He had been with his wife for 9 years and she was pregnant with there third child. Her hair had started to fall out due to a hard pregnancy and stress of thinking he was cheating on her and destroying their family. He met a beautiful girl in his office at work. She had a cute little accent, cute little bum and rumour had it she was into threesomes. All the guys wanted her and she was currently divorcing her husband.
They would often flirt and started to fool around together. They had late night phone calls and he would drop everything for her. They started to go on dates together and got a bit closer. He was also unhappy in his relationship and wasn’t ready for another baby.
The pregnant wife found out about the affair and the two of them broke up. The guy and the office girl tried to make a relationship with each other. He managed to have good sex with her at the beginning and didn’t care for his ex partner and children and he was so infatuated with this girl.
6 months later he realised he still loved his wife and missed his once happy home. The wife did not take him back. He realised the grass was not greener on the other side. He broke up with the office girl but when the partner did not take him back he went back to the office girl.
The ex pregnant wife is no longer pregnant and has blossomed into a beautiful single independent women and mother of three. Her hair has grown back and she has lost heeps of weight and has a gorgeous bum. The guy and his office girl are still struggling to make it work, constantly breaking up and making up and always arguing.
The ex pregnant girl is me and that guy is my ex.
Maybe your story will be a success though. Good luck!
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A
female
reader, EssentiallyMe +, writes (20 February 2008):
 Don't you dare! Go home to your gorgeous wife and make love with her!! You LOVE her!!! That's messed up that you're even thinking about that, you should go apologize to your wife for just that. You need to stay as far away from this stupid girl as you can. Avoid her at all costs if you're that tempted. I can't believe you would even ask such a question, go love your wife.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (20 February 2008): 'cute', 'funny', 'gorgeous bum'. Honestly what is wrong you! She is not a cake, she is a person. Have some self control for goodness sake. Read those words back 'cute, 'funny' and 'gorgeous bum' and picture yourself saying them to your wife when she asks you why you risked your marriage for this girl? If your marriage has problems try counselling and if it doesn't but you are just a bit bored, SPICE IT UP AGAIN. I'm a woman and I was tempted by a man at work when my partner and I had some problems but I can tell you I am SO glad i didn't do anything. Your wife deserves not to be cheated on and the brunette's boyfriend may well come and find you and give you a good beating if he finds you messing around his woman so it doesn't bode well at all. I think you already know the answer to your own question and either you want other people to validate your feelings of knowing it is wrong, to stop you doing anything, OR, you might be being cynical and secretly hoping someone will say it is ok to have a harmless fling?! in any event, it is never ever a good idea to start a new relationship/fling whilst you are in a serious long term one, so don't do it. It's good that you came on here to ask around before doing anything, that shows SOME self control! I know it can seem tempting when we have been with one person for a while but Honestly - Don't Do It! It's a recipe for disaster and it is very rare that people get away with having 'just sex' or whatever. And in any case, apart from that you would be betraying your wife. Does she deserve that and would you like it if she did it to you. You sound as though you want to have your cake and eat it, plus extra cream on top! It's all a bit shallow (sorry not for me to judge, but you did ask and on this site, if you ask, you often find people are not backward at coming forward with their honest thoughts!!). It's up to you - you are a grown man in your twenties but I would say definitely don't do it. Stop having lunch with her and put your energies into impressing your boss or improving your career. Any oh my God, meeting in the lavatories is just MUCKY your wife would be gutted if she heard that her husband had been groping this woman in the loo. Come on Man get a grip. Take your wife out to dinner and pamper her and forget about this other girl she is just eye candy and is probably 'playing' you anyway. Take care x
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A
female
reader, Laura1318  +, writes (20 February 2008):
 The lips of another woman is sweet
but the fruits is bitter .
Can you eat the bitter fruit when your wife finds out?
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A
male
reader, anon_e_mouse +, writes (20 February 2008):
 Personally I think you should stay away.
She's got a "serious boyfriend" and you're MARRIED!
If you really love your wife then you wouldn't even consider it! Would you really put your marriage at risk for the sake of a fling? If so then shouldn't be married in the first place.
What if it were the other way round and your wife was seriously contemplating cheating on YOU with someone else? How would you feel about that?
Sometimes I do wonder why some people get married. Especially in your case where it obviously means nothing if all it takes is a "gorgeous brunette" with "a gorgeous bum" for you to throw it all away.
I don't know the full story here and can only go by what you've written here. If you are you having "marital" problems seeking attention elsewhere is not the way to go about it. You should do the right thing and sort out your relationship problems with your wife if that is the case. If you're not having problems then you soon will have since eventually, one way or another, it will get out and then you'll likely be going through a divorce.
Personally, I feel sorry for your wife.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (20 February 2008): You obviously have no idea what you are suggesting - do you have any idea how you would hurt your wife? But then I suppose all you are thinking with is between your legs.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (20 February 2008): Hi Hunny
cute bum or not hunny ill be honest with you NO!!!!!!
Im trying to save your marriage, not being judgmental ok hunny, Ive got a saying..The grass may look greener on the other side but its the depth and colour you need to look for! How would you feel if your wife was thinking along the same lines with a hunky guy who flirted like hell with her yea its tempting eh! your getting so much attention that sometimes in marriage tends to calm down, But it doesnt mean she doesnt love you sweetheart...There is this great looking guy down the garage and he flirts constantly with me everytime im in there, But im happy with my fiance and even though he has lovely eyes and a cute arse ill let someone else have him... Please think before you do something you may regret for the rest of you life hunny.
This is said out of kindness like a computor kick up the arse! :) if you need to chat message me but I wouldnt go any futher with this sweetheart TAKE CARE OF YOU WITH LOTS OF LOVE N HUGS MANDY XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX
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A
male
reader, Frank B Kermit +, writes (20 February 2008):
 Should you risk your marriage?
No.
Start thinking with the smart head.
-Frank
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A
female
reader, AvonLady  +, writes (20 February 2008):
The big question here is " Will I get caught " isn't it ?If you are sure the answer is NO then go for it and never, NEVER admit anything and NEVER tell anyone. If your wife never finds out then no harm done.
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