He can't let my past go...
Q. My boyfriend wont forget what has happened to me in the past, he is always saying how it affects him and makes him upset, but he still says that he loves me loads and its only when he is reminded about what happened he hates me and wonders why he is ...
A. 27 November 2009: There isn't much you can do. The past can't be changed.
This problem is your boyfriend's problem, not yours. Only he can get his head out of that negative place.
All you can do is make sure that you know it's not your fault. You haven't done... (read in full...)
Stuck on her sexual past
Q. Im 18 shes 17. Okay. So this may sound stupid to most of you. But hear me out. Me and my g/f has ben datin 4 almost 6 months now. She has 13 sexual partners she first claimed 4 were rape but has sense came clean to only one being rape. While i ...
A. 22 November 2009: It's not a good topic to discuss: bringing up past partners is never going to make your current one feel good.
Just tell her you don't want to hear it anymore. In a nice way of course. Explain to her that it makes you uncomfortable and you'd ra... (read in full...)
Who the heck is "Sadie?"
Q. the guy I ve been seeing just text me, he said ok tks sadie, thing is my name isnt sadie....what shall i do...
A. 19 November 2009: It could have been an auto-complete thing. Text messages have a tendency to do that.
Or he could love that Beatles Song... ;)... (read in full...)
How to approach the subject of giving and receiving oral?
Q. Hi i need some information on how to approach a girl whilst in foreplay and to either give or recieve oral?? Because im too shy to ask for a blowjob and im scared to pull her pants down and give her orar due to she might freak out and run off or hit ...
A. 19 November 2009: I have to disagree with the last comment. Whilst that may be true in their experience, i have known several girls who have very enthusiastically enjoyed giving oral sex. And I'm 100% certain they weren't pretending to.... (read in full...)
How to approach the subject of giving and receiving oral?
Q. Hi i need some information on how to approach a girl whilst in foreplay and to either give or recieve oral?? Because im too shy to ask for a blowjob and im scared to pull her pants down and give her orar due to she might freak out and run off or hit ...
A. 19 November 2009: Personally, I feel if you're too shy to ask for it then you shouldn't be doing it.
You'll find that if you can openly and clearly talk about sex with your partner then you'll end up having much better sex, and both getting what you want.
... (read in full...)
Should I leave her to sort out her past?
Q. Hi - I need help at this point in my life! I have met a wonderful woman - we met through an internet dating site. Everything was amazing from the very start - a great friendship, common interests, physical attraction, the best sex I have ever had in ...
A. 19 November 2009: This is depressingly common. Especially as we get older (we get more baggage I guess...)
Echo I right. I would add that you can gently keep connected to her without pushing for a relationship. She is probably desperate for one, but terribly... (read in full...)
Is he too dominant in bed?
Q. i think maybe my bf is to controling in bed. wen we have sex he is always moving my body into positions and he dont ask me if stuff is okay. sometimes he pushs my head to his penis and then holds it there and then he thrusts. sometimes this hurts ...
A. 18 November 2009: It might just be that he's been influenced a lot by porn. What you describe is 'normal' porn acting behaviour. It's just that porn and 'normal' sex don't really resemble each other very much.
In my experience, dominant and aggressive sex can be g... (read in full...)
Am I wrong to be unhappy with my girlfriend performing Burlesque shows?
Q. hi recenty my girlfriend started doing burlesque shows. i think it's just a way for her to get on stage and strip to her under wear and talk dirty with a room full of strangers. is it wrong that i don't like it, i haven't told her out right ca...
A. 18 November 2009: Personally I wouldn't be willing to date a burlesque dancer. I just know it would make me unhappy.
You need to make your feelings clear. If she prefers you to the job you'll stay together, if she prefers the job to you, then you won't.
It's he... (read in full...)
I have slept with 44 girls can't stay attracted to any women!
Q. I have slept with 44 girls now and I can't seem to find the one. I dont want to settle for second best and I feel like the right girl hasn't come along. I am a male whore and I enjoy having sex. But I get annoyed with women quickly and little ...
A. 16 November 2009: You need to fall in love, commit and invest your trust and hopes in a relationship. Then have her unceremoniously dump you.
After that's happened to you a couple of times you'll probably grow up.... (read in full...)
I need to save this relationship! How can I show him I am trustworthy?
Q. Hi. I'm having trouble with my boyfriend! We've been going out for a year. I've lied about a few things to him and he found it all out. I've asked for forgiveness and made promises to be better, to be more trustworthy. Unfortunately, i went against ...
A. 12 November 2009: "I've lied about a few things to him and he found it all out. I've asked for forgiveness and made promises to be better, to be more trustworthy. Unfortunately, i went against my words - broke my promise and lied again!!"
I think you've proven y... (read in full...)
Why am I not enough for her?
Q. hi. when me and my girlfriend get horny and talk about having sex, the last few times she always mentions using her toy and watching porn. should i be worried that she doesnt find me attractive anymore or any good in bed that she needs this ext...
A. 11 November 2009: Some people have issues with porn in relationships, others don't. It's almost impossible to say whether it's objectively ok, it's about whether you both are ok with it or not. Sounds like you might differ on this issue.
Personally I don't approve ... (read in full...)
Why do guys say I'm not attractive?
Q. Hi SO what to do! I have been told in my ols school i am really pretty and was popular and had many bf but know if we play spin the bottle no guy wants to kiss me. Ok not true they do but WHY do guys say I am not attractive? When I used to get ...
A. 11 November 2009: Guys will tell a girl she's not attractive in order to have sex with her. Why? Well, if she thinks she's not attractive she's (usually) easier to get into bed. Also, a girl in that situation will sometimes want to prove the guy wrong. Or she'll ... (read in full...)
I would already be engaged to her if it wasnt for her past! How do I overcome this?
Q. I'll try to keep it short. In June 07 I met a girl at a party and ending up sleeping with her that night. Both of us were sober. For the rest of the summer we hooked up here and there - f buddies. About a month after we first met my good friend told ...
A. 11 November 2009: This comes up here very often, usually daily, so know that you're not unusual in having issues with this. Some specific feedback:
"The way my memory works I'm 90% sure I'll never forget about it. Also, each time I reach a breaking point, it is wo... (read in full...)
Boyfriend wants a threesome!
Q. My boyfriend and I have been together for 8 months now, and very much in love. We were both kind of promiscuous before we ended up together but we are very happy to be in a faithful, trustworthy relationship. The boyfriend has brought up havin...
A. 10 November 2009: Not sure if you've had a threesome before, but one thing you might want to bear in mind is that many guys don't want to have a committed relationship with a girl who has in the past. Something to bear in mind for later. We see too many guys on this ... (read in full...)
Trying to cope with my girlfriend's past
Q. I'm having problems coping with my girlfriend's past. We've been dating for a month and I really want it to last but every once in a while it comes up and haunts me a little bit. She was my first everything. I first found out when I asked he...
A. 10 November 2009: You're in a difficult situation. For your backgrounds to be so different is not going to be easy for you to get past, probably.
You being a virgin before her.
Her having had sex with 'at least 30'. Given she can't even remember a gangbang with ... (read in full...)
Do guys like it when women moan during sex?
Q. Do guys like it when girls moan during sex?...
A. 9 November 2009: What LazyGuy said...
Yes totally, but only if you mean it. Because we'll tend to do the things again that got you to moan the first time. So moan at the stuff you like, and you'll get more of the stuff you like and less of the stuff you don't.
... (read in full...)
I lied about my sexual history. How can I make it up to him?
Q. I have been with my boyfriend for 7 months now. When we first got together i lied about how many sexual partners i had had. Since then, I have lied to him about 2 or 3 more times, letting only a little bit more information slip but not telling him ...
A. 9 November 2009: Ouch, that's a tough situation. To be honest, guys in your boyfriend's situation come on this site having been lied to in this way. And the majority of them can't trust afterwards, and end up breaking up :( Your boyfriend may be able to get over ... (read in full...)
We had sex, but I don't want a relationship, should I call him?
Q. Ive known this guy for over a year and we have hooked up in the past. Last week we ran into each other a few times, each time we were drunk. Last night we ran into each other at a party and ended up having sex. We had pretty kinky sex last night. ...
A. 9 November 2009: Most men when offered no-strings-attached kinky sex will say 'are you free right now, can I come over?'.
I would make your conditions clear, I doubt you'll have too much trouble. Until you start to develop feelings for him that is. Don't expect h... (read in full...)
Is my girl hinting that she wants anal sex?
Q. Ok, so my girlfriend and I had tried anal sex a long time ago and she didn't like it, but we didn't do the "prep" work to make it enjoyable, sort of just were spontaneous about it...big mistake. Anyhow, I can care less, but she asked for it the...
A. 8 November 2009: Just ask her directly. Saves a lot of misunderstanding. Besides, i'm of the opinion that if you're not able to talk about something, you shouldn't be doing it.... (read in full...)
Is Polycystic Ovarian Synrome hereditary?
Q. my sister has just found out that she has Polycystic Ovarian Syndrome and she is trying for a baby. The doctor said it may be harder for her to conceive because of this. Does anyone know if it is hereditary?? Its just that a few years ago when i was ...
A. 3 November 2009: According to this link, yes it is. To quote:
"Both sisters and daughters of women diagnosed with PCOS have a 50% chance of developing this syndrome"
http://wuphysicians.wustl.edu/page.aspx?pageID=491... (read in full...)
I have a "shag buddy" but now I want a proper relationship with him
Q. I've been sleeping with a close male friend for about 2 years, you could desbribe him as a "shag buddy". I was coming out of a long term relationship when it began, but am now single, and would love to have a go at taking things to another level ...
A. 3 November 2009: The only way I know of to deal with this is to stop sleeping with him. Then when he comes to you wanting sex, you have to demand 'relationship status' or however you define 'the next level'. He doesn't get the sex without that.
If you relent a... (read in full...)
What's the biggest age difference that won't make society feel awkward?
Q. i'm almost 18. there's a guy i like right now who's 23. we have decent banter and tend to stare at each other, but that isn't going to work out because he just got engaged. there's another guy who's 30 and we have terrific banter and i alway...
A. 1 November 2009: Seems pretty accurate. It's different for men and women of course. That figure applies to older men and younger women. It's not really socially acceptable for women to date men more than a year or two younger than them!
Socially acceptab... (read in full...)
Does she look at other men? Is she lying to me?
Q. I feel terrible. I do not know what to do. I have accused my girlfriend time after time after time of looking at other men and she always insists that she doesn't. But I see her looking around whenever we are outside, so she has to be judging and ...
A. 1 November 2009: "I can't stop thinking that she's looking at other men"
It sounds like you have obsessive jealousy. It's a serious problem where you imagine your partner is doing things that she's not. This can also be called 'delusional jealousy', 'morbid ... (read in full...)
I lied to my fiancee that I'm a virgin... what now?
Q. Hi i had forced to have sex now im getting married and i lied to my fiancee that im a virgin i cant tell him the truth what should i do??????????/ plz help ...
A. 1 November 2009: You absolutely need to tell him. He has a right no know this before he gets married to you, it's too important a piece of information about you to keep a secret until after he's promised to spend the rest of his life with you.
Many times on this ... (read in full...)
I asked why she wanted to marry me and she couldn't answer
Q. should i be concern my girlfriend get alone well because i adapt to people well but we are not really compatible and she spend all her time looking at wedding sites,venues shows etc... iask her why she wanted to marry me couldn't really answer....
A. 1 November 2009: You don't need a reason. It's enough to just want to. Getting married is about emotion and feelings, and you don't have to have rational 'reasons' for having feelings. They just are what they are.
But, if you don't think you're compatible then tha... (read in full...)
Anal sex is far to painful for me and I feel like a failure but I can't do it any more... help!
Q. Me and my boyfriend have a great sex life, despite him working long hours on most days. he's wonderful, like mr. perfect, and i really love him, but i have a really big problem. He's really keen on anal sex, but i've tried it two to three times, and ...
A. 31 October 2009: Useful site:
http://www.puckerup.com/... (read in full...)
Am I unreasonable to ask to see his email.
Q. My spouse has in the recent past had an affair. He hides his income He tells me that it is none of my business. i have no access to, or knowledge of his income. He tells me that it is not my business who he knows or what he does, and that i just ...
A. 31 October 2009: Normally no. But under these circumstances full disclosure is reasonable and merited. The onus is on him to rebuild trust: this will help to a degree, and should be part of an overall willingness to be open about anything and everything. Withholding ... (read in full...)
What's the biggest age difference that won't make society feel awkward?
Q. i'm almost 18. there's a guy i like right now who's 23. we have decent banter and tend to stare at each other, but that isn't going to work out because he just got engaged. there's another guy who's 30 and we have terrific banter and i alway...
A. 30 October 2009: It's the 'half your age + 7 rule'...
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Age_disparity_in_sexual_relationships#The_.22half-your-age-plus-seven.22_rule... (read in full...)
Is 8 partners too many at my age?
Q. Im 20 and have been having sex since i was 17. i have had 8 partners and when i told my new bf he looked shocked. he said it was becouse im not loose down there. but i feel like he thought that was alot. is 8 partners at my age to many?...
A. 30 October 2009: "Yos: if the man is childish enough to be bothered by the number of your previous sex partners, I dont see the use in having him around."
I'm sorry but it's frequently nothing to do with being childish. Until you've encountered this problem ... (read in full...)
Am I giving off the wrong vibes that I cannot get a man?
Q. I've never had a boyfriend before but in college i've had my share of interactions with guys that only consisted of sex. Last month I broke it off with this guy who turned out to be untrustworthy. I completely put my all into making it work with ...
A. 30 October 2009: "I've never had a boyfriend before but in college i've had my share of interactions with guys that only consisted of sex."
To me that says it all. Are you having sex with these guys in the hope that they'll be your boyfriend?
Do you realiz... (read in full...)
Is 8 partners too many at my age?
Q. Im 20 and have been having sex since i was 17. i have had 8 partners and when i told my new bf he looked shocked. he said it was becouse im not loose down there. but i feel like he thought that was alot. is 8 partners at my age to many?...
A. 30 October 2009: Quiet-echo is onto something. You can probably expect your boyfriend to puzzle over this for a few days and then start asking increasingly personal questions about your former lovers. Some tips:
- Don't provide ANY details about past sexual e... (read in full...)
Where do you draw the line between cheating and not cheating when it comes to dancing?
Q. I'm going to ask some... um, shall we say, hypothetical questions here about dancing and whether or not it is "cheating". Hypothetically if you've been with a guy for 4 years or so, and you do these things: 1. Slow dance alone in a room with anot...
A. 30 October 2009: Neither is 'cheating' but that's not the only way to screw up a relationship.
If my girlfriend did 1 or 3 I'd be really upset I think. I know I would never do either and would expect her to be upset with me if I did.
2 is less of an issue. As ... (read in full...)
I'm having trust issues over the porn and text messages to a dominatrix!
Q. HELP!! I am Having TRUST ISSUES due to Porn Sites I found my BF visiting!!!!!!!!! Its been almost a month since I have confronted him with what I found...including text mesages to an AD he answered about wanting to b dressed and dominated! I bel...
A. 29 October 2009: I wouldn't be so sure he's gay. It sounds very possible he just wants to dress up like a woman and be treated as one. Which is kinky for sure, but not gay.
If you really want to save your relationship you could consider doing this for him. You... (read in full...)
Should I let her past bug me?
Q. I found out that the women that i am dating for 6 mths has had 22 men in her past,some where relationships of 1 to 2 yrs in length but most where only a few mths in length and then she tells me that she has had 4 one nite stands.She is 35 yrs old ...
A. 29 October 2009: "if you really loved her, her past wouldnt be a big problem"
Sorry I have to disagree with that.
Having spoken to and read many many men's accounts on this, one thing has become very clear: the more a man loves his partner, the more he can be h... (read in full...)
G/f's past experiences have made her resentful toward men
Q. My girlfriend of one year has some built up resentment towards men from the experiences she has had. I love this girl, care for her enormously and would really like to help her with this. She has been disrespected sexually, not in an abusive ...
A. 29 October 2009: Part of moving past something is seeing it for what it is. It may be that as well as feeling disrespected, and angry / hurt about that, she may also have some anger towards herself for allowing herself to get in these situations. She was complicit ... (read in full...)
Should I let her past bug me?
Q. I found out that the women that i am dating for 6 mths has had 22 men in her past,some where relationships of 1 to 2 yrs in length but most where only a few mths in length and then she tells me that she has had 4 one nite stands.She is 35 yrs old ...
A. 29 October 2009: Welcome to the (very large) club. Personally I have a 'don't ask' policy these days, as it's best not to know. The more you know, the worse it feels. As for people who say 'the past is the past'... well... that's a truism. It's also false. The past ... (read in full...)
What gift can I get my online boyfriend?
Q. I have an online boyfriend, the only problem is I want to get him something for his birthday, and he's isn't comfortable giving me his adress. Any ideas for what I can get him? ...
A. 28 October 2009: Find out if he has got a gaming PC or PlayStation or XBox. Then get him a game gift token for an online store. Boys live video games and you can send the token via email... (read in full...)
Can online romance be real?
Q. Hi everybody. I just want to ask you guys question. Do you guys believe in online love? I met this guy who have same birthday,same satuition about pass relationship and almost everything are same.We chat on the internet for couple times. Yesterday ...
A. 28 October 2009: Which MMO was it may I ask?... (read in full...)
Can online romance be real?
Q. Hi everybody. I just want to ask you guys question. Do you guys believe in online love? I met this guy who have same birthday,same satuition about pass relationship and almost everything are same.We chat on the internet for couple times. Yesterday ...
A. 28 October 2009: It can happen. But what often happens is that you fall in love with your imagination, not a real person. Then when you meet them (or some time soon after) you come down hard to earth with a painful bump. You learn a lot less about someone through ... (read in full...)
Should I have an affair on my husband?
Q. Soon after getting married, my husband had an unfortunate incident where he became paralysed, resulting in us not being able to have a sex life. I love my husband dearly and I did not leave him. I look after him and attend to him the best way I ...
A. 27 October 2009: What an incredibly difficult situation. For both of you.
Under any remotely normal circumstances I would say an affair is never a good idea. But I fear that in the long run it's between an affair and you leaving your husband. Considering which is... (read in full...)
I feel like dumping her as she finds him attractive!
Q. i recently asked my girlfreind if She would ever have sex with this guy, i know she thinks is good looking, although she told me she is not intrested in anybody but me. She told me she doesnt just sleep with anyone, the fact she has only spoken t...
A. 27 October 2009: " he is 100x better than me, even though i dont let her know this"
This is your problem. You have some kind of inferiority complex with this guy that's making you insecure and jealous.
She's not into him. Your question was a trap that wasn't... (read in full...)
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