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... Send *rank B Kermit a private message | | | *rank B Kermit's profile:Frank Kermit, MA is an Expert Relationship and Dating Coach. He is a Best Selling Author, educator, and regular media correspondent.
He teaches men and women about their emotional needs, how to address each others emotional needs, to be applied to ongoing loving relationships. In 2011, Frank completed an Advanced Certificate in Trauma Counseling and in 2014 completed a certificate in Hypnotherapy.
Frank Kermit has a newsletters that the public can sign up for:
http://www.franktalks.com/newsletter/ (upcoming media spots)
and when you sign up, you get a 400+ page ebook for free (a collection of 100 of Frank's best articles)
Frank answers public questions on dearcupid.org when and IF he has the time. Please understand that Frank makes a professional living through his Date Coaching, and therefore his private paying clients must come first. Frank does not answer private questions received on dearcupid.org unless you want to hire him for some private one on one coaching via skype or over the phone. You can learn more about Frank's Coaching services at www.franktalks.com/
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| Latest articles: Off Limits Dating
No replies yet... 18 September 2013: Is Someone Off Limits for Dating? By Frank Kermit ND, Relationships Mastering the art of dating requires a number of skills such as being socially calibrated, effective communication and knowing what you want. One of the areas that comes up for ...
How to Deal with a Toxic Person
No replies yet... 18 September 2013: The Best Way To Deal With Toxic People By Frank Kermit ND, Relationships Toxic people are defined in this article as people who lack the capacity to reason, or people have the capacity to reason but just do not want to reason with you. In t...
A Broken Engagement is Better Than A Happy Divorce
No replies yet... 31 August 2013: A Broken Engagement is Better Than A Happy Divorce By Frank Kermit ND, Relationships One of the ironies of couples counseling that I often find myself doing is taking the couple through the pre-marital coaching process when they may already be...
A Frank Comment on Miley Cyrus
This question has 6 answers by readers of DearCupid.ORG.
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31 August 2013: A Frank Comment On Miley Cyrus By Frank Kermit ND, Relationships I do not normally comment on the antics of popular culture, as so much of what we see of movies and TV are fiction based romances and relationships. I tried my best to stay fo...
The Wedding Speech
No replies yet... 26 July 2013: The Wedding Speech Remember this day, your wedding day. Not for the dresses and suits, not for the extravagance, nor the dinner and dancing, but remember your wedding day because of the reasons you chose to marry your spouse. Remember who is it that...
Sexually Incompatible Couples
No replies yet... 19 July 2013: Sexually Incompatible Couples Sex is not the most important thing in a relationship. However, couples who love each other dearly and connect on so many levels, but whom are sexually incompatible tend to find that sex can be at the core of a numb...
Separation and Dating, Part 2 of 2
No replies yet... 28 June 2013: Separation and Dating, Part 2 of 2 Separation does not automatically lead to divorce unless you let it. It is up to you and your partner to put in the work so that it does not happen. In the event you are the only one trying to work on yourself and ...
Separation and Dating Part 1 of 2
No replies yet... 22 June 2013: Separation and Dating Part 1 of 2 One of the most damaging actions an individual can take is to start dating someone new when going through a separation with their serious long term partner (spouse, common-law partner or a defacto-union). When I use ...
The Frank Break Up Formula
No replies yet... 14 June 2013: The Frank Break Up Formula By Frank Kermit ND, Relationships Breaking up with someone is rarely an enjoyable or pleasant experience. In fact, there are those individuals who stay in less than satisfying relationships, and even can go all the ...
The Frank Romance Formula part 3 of 3
No replies yet... 8 June 2013: The Frank Romance Formula Part 3 By Frank Kermit ND, Relationships Continued from last article: The Frank Romance Formula is: A. (Stimulation of the 5 senses) + B. (Addressing the emotional needs of that person) + C. (Sensual/Sexual Contex...
The Frank Romance Formula Part 2 of 3
No replies yet... 3 June 2013: The Frank Romance Formula Part 2 By Frank Kermit ND, Relationships Continued from last article: The Frank Romance Formula is: A. (Stimulation of the 5 senses) + B. (Addressing the emotional needs of that person) + C. (Sensual/Sexual Contex...
The Secret Of Seduction is that it Happens in the Future
This question has 2 answers by readers of DearCupid.ORG.
Newest answer was posted
3 May 2013: The Secret Of Seduction is that it Happens in the Future By Frank Kermit ND, Relationships The future is where actual seduction takes place. That is the key to seduction. It has very little to do with turning someone on when you see them. I...
The S.L.A.P. Theory Of Life Lessons
This question has 1 answer by a reader of DearCupid.ORG.
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27 April 2013: The S.L.A.P. Theory Of Life Lessons By Frank Kermit ND, Relationships Sometimes life will slap you down when it has a lesson to teach you. For some people, the slap may be a light swat, and for others the slap has to be a severe smack down. ...
Dating With Disabilities
No replies yet... 5 April 2013: Dating With Disabilities by Frank Kermit ND, Relationships I once went on a date with a woman that had severe food allergies. We went out to a movie and I wished she had told me ahead of time. Although she mentioned that she was deathly all...
Rejection: The Worst Best Thing That Can Ever Happen
No replies yet... 21 March 2013: Rejection: The Worst Best Thing That Can Ever Happen By Frank Kermit ND, Relationships Rejection is the worst best thing that can ever happen to you. Managing rejection is a necessary part in managing your love life. Over the course of your ...
Things they do not tell you about having kids
This question has 2 answers by readers of DearCupid.ORG.
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15 March 2013: Things They Do Not Tell You About Having Kids By Frank Kermit ND, Relationships I always try to be very practical and realistic in my articles. This can come across very negative, given that my topic is Relationships (and all things relative...
When Friendship Is Meaningless
No replies yet... 8 March 2013: Friendship Is Meaningless Stop Hanging Out With Friends Who Sexually Reject You By Frank Kermit ND, Relationships Friendship is meaningless. There I said it. Now before you shoot one of your nasty emails to the editor, actually read this colum...
Who Cares What People Think? Depends...
This question has 1 answer by a reader of DearCupid.ORG.
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1 March 2013: How Much Should You Care About What Other People Think? By Frank Kermit ND, Relationships T here will be times when we want to do something in our lives that is meaningful to us. It could be a decision related to abandoning education, wh...
Learn How to Choose the Right Fights!
No replies yet... 21 February 2013: Pick And Choose Your Fights By Frank Kermit ND, Relationships Fighting in relationships is normal. The issue is not whether you fight. The issue is HOW a couple fights. Do they talk out their disagreements? Do they wait until they are alon...
Starting Over After V-day?
No replies yet... 14 February 2013: Starting Over? By Frank Kermit ND, Relationships Valentine’s day can be a day of reckoning for some people. Meaning, the events leading up to, on the day of, and afterwards can really wreck your life. This is one of the reasons I often refer to...
A Relationship is: Acceptance at the Worst, Loving at the Best
No replies yet... 6 February 2013: A Relationship is: Acceptance at the Worst, Loving at the Best By Frank Kermit, Relationships At my weekly relationship workshop last Saturday I issued one of my famous “Frankisms” that seemed to really resonate with the attendees. I was trying...
Asking Hard Questions
No replies yet... 1 February 2013: Asking Hard Questions By Frank Kermit ND, Relationships When trying to decide if you should be committed to someone, moving in with someone, getting engaged, and getting married, each new transition brings about the unpleasant task of askin...
Ex Lovers and Weddings Do Not Mix
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24 January 2013: Ex Lovers and Weddings Do Not Mix By Frank Kermit, Relationships If you ever had sex with someone that is about to get married, and have been invited to the wedding, do not go. This is especially true if the spouse-to-be feels uncomfortable havi...
Couples in Transition: Monogamy and Non-monogamy
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16 January 2013: Couples in Transition: Monogamy and Non-monogamy By Frank Kermit ND, Relationships Couples who are experiencing a transition in the status of their relationship may sometimes look to explore new ways of redefining their sex lives b...
Common Sense For Common Scents By Frank Kermit, Relationships
This question has 1 answer by a reader of DearCupid.ORG.
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13 December 2012: Common Sense For Common Scents By Frank Kermit, Relationships As the holiday season approaches, invitations begin to swarm in for get-togethers from family, friends and even office parties. It is a time of people coming together, and in some ca...
Couples in Transition
No replies yet... 29 November 2012: Couples in Transition By Frank Kermit, Relationships When a couple is going through a change in the status of their relationship they are a couple in transition. This includes couples that are transitioning from monogamy to non-monogamy, from no...
Your Home Is Your Seduction
No replies yet... 15 November 2012: Your Home Is Your Seduction By Frank Kermit, Relationships Your date is coming over to your place! You have seen each other a couple of times already, but this is different. This is YOUR PLACE, not some coffee shop or movie theatre or restaur...
The Movie Of Your Life’s Journey
No replies yet... 6 November 2012: The Movie Of Your Life’s Journey By Frank Kermit, Relationships The movie of your life is how we each envision our lives unfolding throughout our life span. This concept goes beyond simple fantasizing of what your life would be like. Writing ...
What Love Masks by Frank Kermit
This question has 7 answers by readers of DearCupid.ORG.
Newest answer was posted
2 November 2012: What Love Masks By Frank Kermit, Relationships A mentor of mine taught me that love is not blind; it is just that categories are rigid. When you meet someone, you put that person in a category (lover, friend, temptation, fling, does-no...
The Chocolate Made It Too Much Work: An Article About EFT and Weight Loss
No replies yet... 2 November 2012: The Chocolate Made It Too Much Work An Article About EFT and Weight Loss I have a confession. I used to daydream about food. You know that point in the day when someone catches you; your head in your hands, that dreamy look on your face? If so...
Have You Tried NOT Dating Your Type?
No replies yet... 1 November 2012: Have You Tried NOT Dating Your Type? By Frank Kermit, Relationships We all have our “type”. By “type” I am referring to that type of person each of us is madly attracted too. Each of us has our preference of what we like, what turns us on, ...
Is there such a thing as Happily Single?
No replies yet... 19 October 2012: Is there such a thing as Happily Single? By Frank Kermit, Relationships Is being single really that bad? After all, when a person considers the amount of pain that a relationship or casual dating can cause, it may seem that just skipping the w...
Be Thankful For a Broken Heart
No replies yet... 11 October 2012: Be Thankful For A Broken Heart By Frank Kermit, Relationships Ok, I hate this. I really hate this part of the process. However, it is a necessary part of the process, and if I am expected to help encourage others to do it, first I have to demo...
Stop Talking About Your Ex On Dates!
No replies yet... 5 October 2012: Stop Talking So Much About Your Ex By Frank Kermit, Relationships So you are on a date with someone new. You are excited. You are nervous. You hope that this is finally going to be the one. You meet. So far, you both like what you see. This...
Dating in Social Circles
No replies yet... 29 September 2012: Dating In Social Circles By Frank Kermit, Relationships Dating can be tricky. Does the other person like you the way you think he or she might? Do you really like that person enough to get more serious, or do you want to keep it more casual a...
Frank Guide to Speed Dating
No replies yet... 21 September 2012: Frank Guide To Speed Dating By Frank Kermit, Relationships Every way to meet someone new is a good way. Though friends, through the Internet, blind dates, approaching someone you want to meet, at a workshop, matchmaking companies, business conv...
Relationship Goal Setting
This question has 1 answer by a reader of DearCupid.ORG.
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15 September 2012: Relationship Goal Setting By Frank Kermit, Relationships Setting goals in most areas of your life can be challenging. When it comes to relationships, there are even more challenges. Whereas in other areas of your life such as education, emplo...
Battling The Savior Complex in Relationships
No replies yet... 6 September 2012: Battling The Savior Complex By Frank Kermit, Relationships As children, many of us grew up on stories about the hero that saves a person, and in the process, earned the undying love and loyalty of the person saved so that the hero and that saved ...
Get Out Of Your Own Way!
No replies yet... 30 August 2012: Get Out Of Your Own Way By Frank Kermit, Relationships One of the biggest obstacles that a person can have as an obstruction on their path of finding happiness, peace and healing for their love life, is themselves. Although most people wou...
Your Choices Today Become The Past You Have To Share Tomorrow
No replies yet... 26 August 2012: Your Choices Today Become The Past You Have To Share Tomorrow By Frank Kermit, Relationships Young adults tend to discount how the choices they make today will impact their futures tomorrow. At least, when it comes to relationships. The bes...
Are You A Partner Or A Liability?
This question has 1 answer by a reader of DearCupid.ORG.
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17 August 2012: Are You A Partner Or A Liability? When it really is you and not them By Frank Kermit, Relationships “It’s not you, it’s me.” Have you ever heard that said to you when someone broke up with you? Have you ever been the one to use it when dump...
The 7 Weird Words That Help Define Relationships
No replies yet... 9 August 2012: The 7 Weird Words That Help Define Relationships By Frank Kermit, Relationships There are 7 certain words that catch many people off guard when it comes to relationships. They are: Lust, Love, Sex, Dating, Commitment, Marriage, and Monogamy. ...
Fear of Conflict Is Rooted in The Fear Of Loss.
No replies yet... 20 July 2012: Fear of Conflict Is Rooted in The Fear Of Loss By Frank Kermit, Relationships Are you too nice when it comes to relationships? Do you walk on eggshells because you do not want to upset your partner? Are you reluctant to enforce your bounda...
Re-Establishing Trust in a Relationship Article
This question has 2 answers by readers of DearCupid.ORG.
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12 July 2012: Broken Trust Takes More Than Time To Re-Establish By Frank Kermit, Relationships Trust is one of the most important components of a relationship. Love is a great start, but it takes more than loving someone, or being loved by someone, to make ...
Understanding Emotional Needs
This question has 2 answers by readers of DearCupid.ORG.
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4 July 2012: Understanding Emotional Needs: What We Respond To Versus What We Should Like By Frank Kermit, Relationships Emotional needs are about what a person responds to. It has nothing to do with what a person should like. We all should be attracte...
Red Flags: What To Watch Out For On A Date
No replies yet... 29 June 2012: Red Flags: What To Watch Out For On A Date By Frank Kermit, Relationships When you are on a date, and the person you are getting to know says or does something that triggers a well-honed instinct that you need to stop dating that person, you hav...
The Art of Storytelling on a Date
No replies yet... 25 June 2012: Art of Storytelling: Make or Break A Relationship Happy Ending By Frank Kermit, Relationships One of the challenges that people face when they go on dates is that they may not factor in that others will not understand what they are trying ...
Swinger Beginner Advice
No replies yet... 25 June 2012: Swinger Beginners: Keep it Out of the Work Place By Frank Kermit, Relationships Dear Frank, My husband and I recently returned from a business trip/vacation where a few of my husband's co-workers also brought their wives. We really hit it o...
When your Ex becomes a symbol and you can't get over it
No replies yet... 13 June 2012: When Your Ex Becomes A Symbol Relationship Symbolism of Why You Are Still Hooked By Frank Kermit, Relationships We are surrounded by the power of symbols. A symbol is more than just a design we recognize; symbols are a means of making meaning. ...
Ally Vs Enemy: Understanding The Emotional Needs of Men
No replies yet... 9 June 2012: Is She His Ally or His Enemy? Understanding The Emotional Needs of Men By Frank Kermit, Relationships The best way I know how to teach people about the emotional needs of men is to break it down to absolute fundamentals. If people can und...
Dating After A Break Up - Just How Long Should You Wait?
This question has 2 answers by readers of DearCupid.ORG.
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1 June 2012: Dating After Breaking Up? The Sooner The Better By Frank Kermit, Relationships “How much time should I wait before I start dating again?” is a common question that I get asked from someone that has just recently gotten dumped, and still sufferi...
Relationship Redemption: How To Forgive Yourself and Get Closure
This question has 2 answers by readers of DearCupid.ORG.
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23 May 2012: Relationship Redemption How To Forgive Yourself and Get Closure By Frank Kermit, Relationships We all make mistakes in life. If you have ever tried to get into a relationship, are in a relationship, or are recovering from a relationship, ...
Finding The Meaning Of Your Life And Relationships
No replies yet... 15 May 2012: The Meaning of your Relationships Starts With The Meaning Of Your Life By Frank Kermit, Relationships Contemplate your death. No seriously. In order to make meanings of your relationships past, present and those you will have in the futur...
The Mother-Lover Theory Understanding The Emotional Needs of Women
This question has 4 answers by readers of DearCupid.ORG.
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10 May 2012: The Mother-Lover Theory Understanding The Emotional Needs of Women By Frank Kermit, Relationships A woman can only play one of two roles in a man’s life. She is either his mother or his lover. She cannot be both. When a man addresses a wom...
Moving To The Next Level: Understanding The Hierarchy of Relationships
This question has 3 answers by readers of DearCupid.ORG.
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1 May 2012: Moving To The Next Level Understanding The Hierarchy of Relationships By Frank Kermit, Relationships One of the biggest mistakes people make in relationships is to promote someone up the hierarchy of commitment that has not really earned it. I...
Beware Your Friends when it comes to love
No replies yet... 15 April 2012: Beware Your Friends They May Not Want You To Be Loved By Frank Kermit, Relationships Mistakes Singles Make # 6… Seeking the approval of friends that influences your love life choices. Love may come and go, but a friendship can last a lifetim...
Are Relationships Worth The Risk?
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8 April 2012: Relationships = Risk But is it really worth it? By Frank Kermit, Relationships Given that there is so much risk in getting involved in relationships, or having sex for that matter, is it at all worth it to even bother? After all, a broken hear...
Tattoos and Relationships
This question has 4 answers by readers of DearCupid.ORG.
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24 March 2012: Beware The L-I-N-K Of (L)ove and (INK) By Frank Kermit, Relationships While at a coffee shop a few weeks ago, I met a tattoo artist. He had his son’s name tattooed on his hand, and being the ever-inquisitive one, I asked him about his profession...
Open Relationships and Infidelity
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17 March 2012: Open Relationships Do Not Always Stave Off Infidelity By Frank Kermit, Relationships Some people believe that one of the surest ways to guarantee fidelity is to only do open relationships. The premise is that people only cheat in monogamous ...
What is a Relationship?
No replies yet... 10 March 2012: What is a Relationship? Is best defined by what it’s NOT By Frank Kermit, Relationships Over the years, I have been asked a number of times “What is a Relationship?” This is a harder question to answer than most people think. In my experience,...
Engaged! Now what?
No replies yet... 19 February 2012: Pre Marital Disclosure What you don’t know, you must know By Frank Kermit, Relationships Valentines day has come and gone. Some relationships have started. Some relationships have ended, and some relationships have proceeded to the next le...
Making Monogamy Work
This question has 2 answers by readers of DearCupid.ORG.
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5 February 2012: Making Monogamy Work By Frank Kermit, Relationships Monogamy is easier than open relationships, because the rules are simpler...but the application of the rules of monogamy is not as easy. Monogamy works for monogamous people...however...
Single Parent Dating, Not Just a Single Issue
This question has 1 answer by a reader of DearCupid.ORG.
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3 February 2012: Single Parent Dating – More Than Just A Single Issue By Frank Kermit At least 40% of marriages end in divorce. Depending on the study you read, the percentage can be higher. Even though the break down of families continues, the drive that ma...
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I'm constantly tired. What's wrong with me?
Q. Hello, i have a health problem. I am always tired, constantly tired and i fel like i have no energy at all. I am 18 now and it has been this way since i was about 9. I have had two blood tests since then for being tired, checking for anemia and diab...
A. 2 October 2007: Sleep Apnea is not about the hours of sleep you get. It is when your throat closes up and you stop breathing in your sleep for a few seconds at a time, and your brain must force you to wake up just enough (not fully wake up) to get your breathing ... (read in full...)
Do I wait for her to find herself?
Q. I spilt with my gf of 5 years about 5 weeks ago. We split because she started saying that she felt that she needed to go travelling on her own and find her self as it were. I then said fine and broke up with her. I love her still and miss her ...
A. 2 October 2007: Move on. Do NOT wait for her. Starting dating new people, and cut ALL contact with her.
-Frank B Kermit... (read in full...)
I'm constantly tired. What's wrong with me?
Q. Hello, i have a health problem. I am always tired, constantly tired and i fel like i have no energy at all. I am 18 now and it has been this way since i was about 9. I have had two blood tests since then for being tired, checking for anemia and diab...
A. 2 October 2007: Have you been tested for sleep apnea at a sleep clinic? I suffered the same thing. I was always tired and exhausted. They did tests to find out at first that I had asthma, and was not getting enough oxygen at times. Once I got the astham ... (read in full...)
Will it put off guys to find out I am going to wait till marriage?
Q. I am a devoted Christian and I am not going to have sex until I am married and I want to wait. I know I am only young but I was wondering if it would put guy's off me, because I wouldn't have sex with them. When I am older would it affect my ...
A. 29 September 2007: It will only turn off those guys that just want you for sex, and have no intentions of waiting until marriage either.
It will require a little bit of work on your part to go places where you can find like minded men, but in time, you will find som... (read in full...)
Is it better to have lost in love than to never have loved at all?
Q. Is it really better to have lost in love than to never have loved at all? If so, why does it hurt so bad....
A. 28 September 2007: Yes it is. A person that never loved at all simply does not have an understanding of the world that you do now. A person can now empathise, sympathise and understand people and emotions better than someone that never loved, or was loved. PAin ... (read in full...)
Is it bad for me to wish my mum was dead, just to have some relief to know that no one is in danger - including herself?
Q. My mother is an alcoholic. She and my stepfather were married almost 10 years before they got a divorce. I understand why he did it. He had to choose either his 4 children (including me) or my mother who was helpless. It was a hard decision for him ...
A. 28 September 2007: It is not bad. It is normal given what you went through. As long as you do not act on those feelings, it is OK to have them.
I wish you peace. Take care.
-Frank B Kermit... (read in full...)
Her ex who cheated on her twice is back on stage and just proposed her! My gf is now very confused, what should I do?
Q. I've been dating a women for a month and things were going great until her ex started pursuing her. A bit of background on me. After marryting at a very young age, I was divorced 2 yrs ago. No children. I have dated many women since then and ...
A. 28 September 2007: If she is considering him seriously at all, then your connection with her simply is not strong enough to withstand more challenges life will throw at you.
She is CONFUSED?!?
Do yourself and her a favor. Break it off with her, and when she com... (read in full...)
Love produces love? Can one love be enough for both?
Q. Is there any true in the motto that Love always produces love? Can One's love(honest and indisputable one) produce love to other side(be it male or female) even if there exist no one? What you think, is it worth or futile endevour being with someone ...
A. 28 September 2007: In the short term, yes it can work. Long term takes more than that. I beleive that everyone should be with someone that loves them back. Otherwise, over time, the emptiness inside destroys a part of who they are on a deeper level.
-Fran... (read in full...)
She said she can't continue the affair though but values my friendship, I can't seem to let her go though!
Q. I love her but she's married...After close to a year she's told me that she can't continue and she can't give me what I want but she values my friendship more than anything. I dunno why but I can't seem to let her go. What do I do? Am I wrong for ...
A. 28 September 2007: How would you feel if it was your wife? Do you even have to ask if it was wrong of you? Cut all contact, and move on. It is not about how you feel about her, it is about how she treats you.
-Frank B Kermit... (read in full...)
Do men like to make their girlfiends jealous to attract them? Or is it to hurt them?
Q. Do men like to make their girlfiends jealous to attract them? Or is it to hurt them? Or is it for them to go away? I'm confused about the way my ex acted as our relationship was shaking not so long ago. I'm wondering why was he trying to make me ...
A. 28 September 2007: If you are dating, it is to remind you that he is still desirable to other women.
If you are broken up, he has just moved on and you need to learn to accept it.
-Frank B Kermit
... (read in full...)
SITE NEWS: Wanted, your ideas for features and improvements!
Q. Hi I'm looking to get some input from everyone on what you'd like to see on the site. How can I make it easier to use? What new features would you like to see? Any annoyances or bugs you'd like to fix? Can I make the moderati...
A. 28 September 2007: Oh, one more thing...I would LOVE to see a feature on the site that would allow people to do a search for all the questions they have answered.
In my column, I only have the last 10 questions or so, and it would be nice to have a complete list bas... (read in full...)
SITE NEWS: Wanted, your ideas for features and improvements!
Q. Hi I'm looking to get some input from everyone on what you'd like to see on the site. How can I make it easier to use? What new features would you like to see? Any annoyances or bugs you'd like to fix? Can I make the moderati...
A. 28 September 2007: I would like to see the ages of the people asking the question should be present in the question listing. Also, I would at least like to see the ages of the people posting anonymously.
One of the big issues that comes up is legal question... (read in full...)
I'm 40 something, can I successfully date two men?
Q. Is it possible for a forty something year old women to successfully date two different men?...
A. 27 September 2007: That is why you date both of them UNTIL you know for sure which one you would want to committ too.
-Frank B Kermit... (read in full...)
Do you think what I did was cheating?
Q. I have been married for 14 years and a year ago my best friend and I had too much to drink and we kissed for less then 2 minutes(female). I told my husband yesterday and he said I cheated so it's over. Do you think that is cheating?...
A. 27 September 2007: Everyone plays the line drawing game. What is cheating for one person, is not cheating for the other.
What the facts seem to be is:
1-Your HUSBAND thinks it is cheating and you need to address that
2-You and your husband apparently never... (read in full...)
How do I convince a man to have a baby with me?
Q. how do i convice a man to have a baby with me ?? i really want another baby only i want this one to be his .. ...
A. 27 September 2007: If you have to work to convince him, then he is not the man you should be having kids with.
-Frank B Kermit... (read in full...)
Should we have a baby? I'm 19, he's 28
Q. I think I want a baby, I have been with my boyfriend for 2 years now. we get on well some of the time and we have discussed it before. how do I know if its right or not? Im nearly 19 and he is 28. ...
A. 27 September 2007: If you have to ask at all, then you are not ready.
So, No, you should not have a baby.
-Frank B Kermit... (read in full...)
Do I marry my fiance or go off with my lover?
Q. I'm a 46-year-old Mother of 8 (3 by my first husband, 5 by my current partner) and I've had many affairs. Most of which my partner has known about. But now I've started a relationship with a man who myself and my Fiance both work with. All of the ...
A. 26 September 2007: I suggest that you look up the term "polyamory", and check out the books The Ethical Slut, The Lifestyle by Terry Gould, and Swinging a Societal Phenomena by Jean Hamel as well as the documentary:When Two Won't Do by Maurren Marovitch. I did and ... (read in full...)
My head says leave, my heart says stay, what do I do?
Q. Where do I go from here after hes messed around again? I've been with my daughters father for nearly four years, in that time we have split up a few times because of his imaturity and due to me finding texts to others girls in his phone. while...
A. 26 September 2007: Listen to your head...always.
... (read in full...)
I'm 40 something, can I successfully date two men?
Q. Is it possible for a forty something year old women to successfully date two different men?...
A. 26 September 2007: As long as you have not promised monogamy and they are aware you date more than one person at a time, then yes, it is possible. Just be honest about the situation, and keep all the details to yourself to protect everyones repuations.
This ... (read in full...)
Do I marry my fiance or go off with my lover?
Q. I'm a 46-year-old Mother of 8 (3 by my first husband, 5 by my current partner) and I've had many affairs. Most of which my partner has known about. But now I've started a relationship with a man who myself and my Fiance both work with. All of the ...
A. 26 September 2007: There are too many undiscussed things here for you to be making any kind of committment to anyone. The fact that you have any kind of doubt in the matter is the sign that you should not be marrying anyone right now.
It sounds like that you are ... (read in full...)
When is it right to change your "relationship status" on myspace / facebook?
Q. when is the right time to change your status? I met my current man on myspace we have only been dating a few weeks, but I am willing to change my status as "in relationship" and I want him to aswell, would it be best to have a talk over this o...
A. 26 September 2007: When you both openly and outwardly acknowledge that you are in a relationship, and not just casually dating.
Talk to him first.
-Frank B Kermit... (read in full...)
Why would a man call his ex when he has someone new?
Q. I am in such a mess emotionally! :( I dated a man for almost 2 yrs and he broke up with me last April. It was painful for both of us, but it was a long distance relationship and he wanted to find a lady who lives closer to him and doesn't have ...
A. 26 September 2007: You asked: Why would a man call his ex when he has someone new?
Frank Answer: Sex, sex and more sex.
-Frank B Kermit... (read in full...)
How can I get my ex to move on - I still care about her as a friend, so I just can't ignore her.
Q. I recently broke up with my girlfriend. A few months ago we got in an argument, and she abandoned me. She lied to me about a lot of things, and i thought that I forgave her. Before I begin, I need to explain that I have no hard feelings. A...
A. 26 September 2007: You said: I need advice on getting her to move on, because I care very much for her as a person and friend. I cant just ignore her.
YES YOU CAN.
You are leading her on with your friendship. End the friendship, she will move on. Stop manipu... (read in full...)
How do I get through to this guy that I'm already committed to my bf??
Q. i have a friend at work who has started showing an intrest in me. have told him from the word go that i have a boyfriend whom i am commited to. He also acknowldges that he has a girlfriend but he only wants to know me better personally. He insists ...
A. 26 September 2007: Have your BF start picking you up from work. When he insists on coming over, one day let him, and make sure your BF is there, and then go into the other room and have sex with the BF, while he waits in the other room for you. This should get the ... (read in full...)
I got drunk and told him I'd had multiple partners and affairs... but it wasn't even true!
Q. If I can get a guys' view on this, I'd appreciate it. I have been with a man for about two years now, in secret (never married, but were both involved in long-term relationships). We have a very close relationship, but not without its hardship...
A. 26 September 2007: You know, becuase of your memory loss, and assuming you never did cheat on him...it is entirely possible that he made up the fact that you confessed to affairs.
BUT when you said: "So I apologised to him for hurting him, and told him I'd understa... (read in full...)
My ex hinted he would tell my husband if I didn't continue the affair. How do I tell my husband without damaging the marriage?
Q. Help, I'm married and have kids. I recently ran into an old boyfriend from my teenage years. My husband knows his name (Chris) and what we did (we never had 'all the way' sex, I just performed oral sex on him about 10 times or so). Anyway, ...
A. 26 September 2007: There are three things you can do...
1-End it with Chris and take the chance he will not tell your husband
2-End it with Chris, tell your husband the truth
3-Get some secret on Chris that would wreck his life worse than yours, and extort h... (read in full...)
How do you know when and what your "pupose" is, so you can teach it to your children and be blessed?
Q. I'm sorry if I offend anyone by bringing religion to the table, but I have a question for the belivers. It has been said many times that everyone has a purpose in this life and that you will be blessed in abundance if you follow that purpose. ...
A. 26 September 2007: I give a seminar of inner game that covers EXACTLY this topic.
Here are some of the writing exercises and assignments I give my students to figure out their meaning of life.
1-Write your own eulogy
2-Fill out your tombstone epitaph
3... (read in full...)
Is it wrong to have a crush on someone if your married and have kids?
Q. Is it wrong to have a crush on someone if your married and have kids?...
A. 25 September 2007: Having a crush is normal, regardless of your marital status. ACTING on it, if you promised you would not is the thing that is wrong.
-Frank B Kermit... (read in full...)
He broke up with me b/c of his family - now I want to make his weekend as miserable as possible!
Q. this is the third time that i have been to this site to ask for help in the last two weeks. i am in my sixtes and my so called bf is in his late sixties. it involves a very emeshed and fused together family.we have been dating for almost 3 years ...
A. 25 September 2007: Good that you two are separate now. Go out and spend your time meeting a new guy. Revenge is not fulfilling, nor will it make anything feel better. I know, I tried it. If anything, it just proves he was right.
Put your energy into finding ... (read in full...)
I hit him in the eye and now he's fled. If he loves me, shouldn't he come back?
Q. hi ive been dating this guy for 1 1/2 and we got engaged about 7 months ago. We have gotten into some bad arguments but four days ago, he was accusing me of something that i had already explained to him so he said oh i misunderstood. a...
A. 25 September 2007: Your birthday is in 3 weeks? THAT is what concerns you? You just got violent with someone that you were planning to committ to, and you can freaking out becuase your b-day is in 3 weeks, and want him to prove his love for you?
You hit him, and... (read in full...)
My bf is pushing his child on me and my family. How can I talk to him about this?
Q. my boyfriend of three months is pushing his child on to me and my family. im 24yrs old if i wanted a kid i would have one. i cant talk to him about this because he ALWAYS takes it the wrong way. i do care about him alot... how do i stop this with ...
A. 25 September 2007: He is testing you for a more serious relationship, and you are failing. He wants to see what kind of mother you will be to his child.
If you are not interesting in raising your bf's kids, then do not date men that already have children... (read in full...)
She had another man's child, I had transexual sex, she won't come near me!
Q. People get curious and try different thing I totally understand that and can accept it. My wife of 10 years just had a baby after the baby was born I found out it was not mine. We are both white and she had a black baby wow what a shocker. She ...
A. 25 September 2007: Firstly, you said: I stayed with her adn support her and the baby.
This was mistake number 1.
Secondly you asked: Can anyone tell me what the difference between what she did and what I did is?
Well, there is an issue of prejudice towar... (read in full...)
I have reason to believe that I cannot trust my man, what do I do?
Q. i have reasons to belive that i cant trust my boyfriend. but i love him too much to let him go. what shall i do?...
A. 25 September 2007: It is not about how he makes you feel or how you feel about him.
It is about how he treats you. If you can not trust him, he is not treating you well enough.
-Frank B Kermit, author of I'm a Man, That's My Job.... (read in full...)
Does the colour of hair have an impact on a girl picking a guy for a boyfriend?
Q. does the colour of hair have an impact on a girl picking a guy for a boyfriend?. I have ginger hair and iv never had a gf. i know im not as confindent with girls as some of my friends are. ...
A. 25 September 2007: It's not your hair. It is the fact you are waiting for a girl to pick you as her boyfriend, instead of you appraoching and pursing girls with confidence.
-Frank B Kermit... (read in full...)
Now my daughter will not talk to me, what should I do?
Q. My wife and I are having trouble and my wife allowed my 20 year old daughter to become aware of the problems in her version - My daughter now won't talk to me and I haven't seen her in 5 months and prior to this incident, we had a good relationship ...
A. 25 September 2007: Your wife committed an unspeakable act. She turned your children against you, by involving them into your personal problems.
Talk to your wife, and let her know that using your daughter to get back at you is a form of emotional abuse...... (read in full...)
Any advice on saving my relationship?
Q. i need to save my relatinship with my girlfriend! having a bad patch, we both love each other. any advice anyone?...
A. 25 September 2007: 12 hour shifts? Is that 5 days a week, or only 3 days a week?
Look, if you like your job, stick with it.
If you beleive that you and her have a real future together, and the job is not that important to you, then find a different job.
... (read in full...)
My friends don't approve of my older boyfriend
Q. ok so im 15 and going out with a 21 year old. everythings fine except my friends are being really annoying about how its wrong. what bothers me the most is my best friend is getting pissed off and hes always like dont even mention your bf anymore ...
A. 21 September 2007: Firstly, your friends may or not be jealous. That male friend of yours might like you himself, and can not stand your bf for that reason.
However...even if that was the reason, you are making a mistake to date him.
You are a minor, and he is... (read in full...)
I've left him for the fifth time, but he doesn't seem upset! Is he b/c he's used to it? This is bothering me!
Q. I've recently (2 weeks ago) left my husband for the 5th time due to his drinking habits. The other times I have left him he has always cried and begged to have me back. This time he acts as if it doesn't bother him. Could this be because he's ...
A. 21 September 2007: He is an addict. You are looking for rational behaviors from an addict and that is going to cause you pain.
I think that even if he calls begging, etc...do not take him back. If you take him back, you are just as guilty for the drama in the rela... (read in full...)
Now that we broke up, he says he will never find anyone like me and regrets having cheated. He is willing to do what it takes, even counselling. Advice?
Q. He's cheated 7 times we been togther almost for years. I love hime more then anything he cheated again but says now he will do whatever it takes to work on his bad ways including counciling. We have had trust issues because of his past and it made ...
A. 21 September 2007: If he is serious about changing, he has to do it on his own WIHTOUT you there. THen you know it is for real. If he can only change with you around...it is not real change, and he will just resent you for it.
-Frank B Kermit... (read in full...)
What to say to him without hurting his feelings, about the touching in public?
Q. hi all my boyfriend and i started dating in june this year and been together since so thats 4 months into the relationship anyway when we go out he tends to love feeling me and kissing me , i dont have a problem with the kissing in public bu...
A. 21 September 2007: Just tell him honestly, calmly and directly when you are alone. He is your bf...if you can not even have an honest talk about something like this, you surely will not be able to handle more serious issues.
As to why he does it?: Maybe he is tryin... (read in full...)
He's hanging out with hsi mates 24/7 and makes my asking for a bit of time sound like a chore. Any tips?
Q. i've been with my boyfriend for nearly two and a half years,we've always had a great relationship but recently he's been hanging out with his mates 24/7 i wouldnt really have a problem with it but when i want to see him he's never around he's always ...
A. 21 September 2007: Well, I am very mean when it comes to things like this...but you could always make it an open relationship, and then ask out one of the mates he hangs with. Let's see where their loyalities are.
If he is not giving you the attention you want, sp... (read in full...)
Any advice on saving my relationship?
Q. i need to save my relatinship with my girlfriend! having a bad patch, we both love each other. any advice anyone?...
A. 21 September 2007: What was the bad patch about?
-FBK... (read in full...)
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