A
male
age
,
anonymous
writes:My wife and I are having trouble and my wife allowed my 20 year old daughter to become aware of the problems in her version - My daughter now won't talk to me and I haven't seen her in 5 months and prior to this incident, we had a good relationship - I tell her I want to talk to her and she responds to me that she doesn't want to talk to me - As her father, what should I do Reply to this Question
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male
reader, Frank B Kermit  +, writes (25 September 2007):
 Your wife committed an unspeakable act. She turned your children against you, by involving them into your personal problems.
Talk to your wife, and let her know that using your daughter to get back at you is a form of emotional abuse...your daughter might not get it now, but she will in the future. This issue is the one you need to address as, I am sure this is not the first time, nor will it be the last time if you don't put your foot down.
Do not pursue your daughter further. If she wants to be angry at you, let her. She wil come around when she realises as adults neither of you are perfect. Do NOT tell your daughter your side of it. You will be committing the same error your wife did.
-Frank B Kermit
A
male
reader, Tommy7 +, writes (24 September 2007):
You didn't say what the problem with your wife was. Obviously you daughter feels strongly about it. Assuming you were a really bad guy, I suggest you make small attempts to contact your daughter periodically. Surely there was a fatherly love before it happened. Remind her or that and that you are only human. If you are dangerous communicate by mail.
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A
female
reader, leanne.od  +, writes (24 September 2007):
 talk to her mum! presumably as you didn't say ex wife, you are still together?
she needs to speak to your daughter and tell her that it is only fair to hear both sides, failing that write her a letter. she needs to hear both sides of this incident before she "takes sides" but tread carefully not to just slag her mum off because obviously her view is strong so be prepared for the outcome.
best of luck
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