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| Latest articles: Facebook: What does it really mean?
This question has 12 answers by readers of DearCupid.ORG.
Newest answer was posted
11 July 2010: Nothing! Several situations can be mistaken to mean something more, when they truly don't carry much significance. For example: The friend you've been crushing on for the last six months accepts your third attempt at a friend request, and...
What to do when the person you're attracted to is already taken.
This question has 7 answers by readers of DearCupid.ORG.
Newest answer was posted
7 July 2010: Run the hell away. I've seen several questions of this nature on the site. It seems like a simple problem, although in reality it's not. It's complicated and messy, and almost always leaves one person's emotions in ruins while the other enjoys hav...
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I couldn't help probe about her sexual past, but I wish she wouldn't have been so honest!!!
Q. Ok here's my problem. My gf and I have been dating for a little over a year now, at the begining of the relationship I asked the inevitable question " how many men have you slept with"?. She asked me to answer the question first, I told her 80 women ...
A. 8 July 2010: So the real problem is the fact that she wouldn't stroke your ego after you fished for compliments, and instead told you the truth? You got exactly what you asked for, she can't be expected to automatically lie just for your sake. The important ... (read in full...)
Should I have been stronger and left my cheating husband?
Q. i have been with my husband for 8 yrs... we were high school sweet hearts, i was only 14 when we got together. he said all the right things and did all the right things, so we've been together ever since. now the yrs have passed and our 5th yr ...
A. 8 July 2010: Because it's not easy to suddenly cut someone you love out of your life. Unfortunately, there's no guarantee he's not going to cheat again, and after getting caught may just put more effort into hiding it better. Look for the signs, i.e. he suddenly ... (read in full...)
My boyfriend of over 1 year didn't get me a birthday present, how do I tell him this bothers me without sounding materialistic?
Q. My boyfriend of over 1 year didn't get me a birthday present. It's not the value of the gift or the actual gift that bothers me, it's the fact that he didn't give me anything at all, not even a card. We went out to a casual dinner and he paid, but ...
A. 8 July 2010: Did he even say happy birthday to you? I imagine he considered paying for dinner to be your gift. I personally don't think you should say anything about not getting more than that, because no matter how you phrase it, you're going to come across as ... (read in full...)
My boyfriend tells me he doesn't believe in marriage!
Q. My boyfriend and I have been together for almost a year and we have a wonderful relationship. In the beginning I wasn’t too sure about him but now I'm very sure that I want to spend the rest of my life with him. I know that he feels very stron...
A. 8 July 2010: If you don't say anything, you're going to be miserable wondering and worrying about where the relationship is going. He's been with you for a long time and has yet to change his mind, so I doubt he'll ever truly want to get married. It doesn't mean ... (read in full...)
Too old for me??
Q. Ok, so I just need some opinions on this. I am really interested in this guy, and he is interested in me. He is 26 and I am 17. Is this too much of an age difference?...
A. 8 July 2010: You're at a different stage of life than he is, and he has nearly a decade of life experience more than you. Generally when older men are interested in a teenage girl, it's for one main reason: they aren't as emotionally mature as women their own ... (read in full...)
He won't 'do oral' on me
Q. My boyfriend and I have been dating for over a year. We've had sex several times, but it's always just me giving him oral and a handjob, and then intercourse. The only part of my body he will touch is my boobs. I've never actually asked him about ...
A. 8 July 2010: You won't ever be satisfied if you don't speak up and tell him what you want. If you don't, he's going to continue to think you're fine with his selfish attitude towards sex, because you've been allowing it.... (read in full...)
My boyfriend loves his 11yr old daughter more than me!
Q. [Mod note: Two questions by the same poster have been combined into one.] My Boyfriend is 35, i am 23 we have known each other for 7 years and have only got together 7 months ago. We have been in our own apartment for 2 months. He has a 11 yr old d...
A. 7 July 2010: It sounds like you're not at all ready to be a step-parent, especially not to a child only 12 years younger than you. He's never going to love you more than her, she's his daughter and will always be his priority.
If you're really that unhappy ... (read in full...)
Is he just wanting to be friends?
Q. I need some advice I am so confused I met a guy online I would always send him a message and everytime I went out he was there and would always stare at me last year I went out he was there next thing I know he made a move on me we hooked up and he ...
A. 7 July 2010: I don't see much significance with him liking your status and pictures, it's just Facebook. People add 'friends' they barely know, so I wouldn't take that too seriously.
As for the other things he's been doing, he's trying to make you jealous.... (read in full...)
Scared I'm no longer a virgin!
Q. well i need help. i am so scared that i am not a virgin, because my boyfriend and i decided to play around and i want to know if am still a virgin if he fingered me...
A. 7 July 2010: As long as that's the only thing he did, you're still a virgin.
Honestly, if you don't know something as simple as this, you shouldn't be doing anything sexual until you learn the basics. Ignorance like this is the reason we have so many 'Am I pr... (read in full...)
Relationship with a married man who doesn't leave his wife
Q. I met a man online. He is still married, but she has moved out of the home. They run a business together and to date they still draw from the same money pot. I have told him from the beginning that my values want a legal separation and/or divorce, ...
A. 7 July 2010: I agree with the others. Claiming to have solid values doesn't mean anything when even you don't follow them, so why should he?
This may help:
http://www.dearcupid.org/question/what-to-do-when-the-person-youre-attracted.html... (read in full...)
My Girlfriend wants to break up with me because she can't get over the fact I've slept with other people?
Q. How can I prevent it ending over something I have no control over!? She resents that I had a past life, where admittedly I slept around with many women I could just for kicks and for self esteem. I changed. Meeting her and starting to go o...
A. 7 July 2010: Deep down, she's probably worried you'd treat her and other women the same way, i.e. as a convenience. She's taking her insecurity and jealousy out on you, for no apparent reason. This doesn't justify her behaviour in the least, though. If she r... (read in full...)
I have a bigger crush on him -- was I too emotional?
Q. Well i have been at this company for a few years..i always thought this one guy was good looking and had a good personality as well..just genuinly friendly it seems and very good at work--remains focused and motivated..he is pretty popular in the ...
A. 7 July 2010: Why is it so important you get this particular man's attention, when there are plenty others that will treat you nicely? I doubt he's worth all this trouble.
As the answers to the original question you posted had said, if he wanted things to go fu... (read in full...)
Is his behavior about control?
Q. My ex-boyfriend is still a bother - why does he insist on finding out what I am doing and with whom? He is jealous of me going out with a guy we both know. But the ex-boyfriend has been living with another woman for over a year! And he doesnt care ...
A. 7 July 2010: It's definitely about control for him. He sounds incredibly insecure, why haven't you blocked him from contacting you?... (read in full...)
Nothing Below the Belt: Is He Gay?
Q. I have been seeing a guy off and on for almost six years. He has NEVER touched me below the waist. He seems to really like my breasts and loves me to touch him and kiss him all over, of course. I guess the main reason I continue to see him ...
A. 7 July 2010: Six years is a really long time to wait just to find out if your suspicions are true. It sounds like he's not completely heterosexual, if heterosexual at all, and is trying to cover it up while being in denial of that fact at the same time. ... (read in full...)
Will he lose interest because I'm a virgin?
Q. I'm 24 years old and still a virgin. I'm not saving it, I just haven't met someone I'm comfortable enough to sleep with yet. Here's my problem. I'm interested in a guy right now who is so kinky he makes hardcore porn look soft. I'm pretty kinky ...
A. 7 July 2010: He might see it as a positive thing. You won't know until you tell him.... (read in full...)
Sooo... I don't go facebook like everyone else
Q. so i'm 16 and i dont go on facebook like at all. i have one but i just don't go on it at all.i honestly just don't c the obsession and ppl kind of freak out like "omg wat" when i tell them i don't go on it.i mean i know that everyone loves it but ...
A. 7 July 2010: You're not weird. I don't really see the point of it, either. I'm on Facebook to stay in touch with friends, and to this day only have 11 on there, because I only add people I know in person or very well. For many people it seems all they care about ... (read in full...)
I have been waiting 17 months for him to leave his partner and move in with me!
Q. Well I'm in great need of help and advise, I'm 23 I have a good job and my own place, here's where the problem starts.. I have been seein this guy now for 17 month he's 10 years older than me but he acts the same age we get on so well when we're ...
A. 5 July 2010: He's never going to leave her, especially when you're giving him everything without getting anything in return. It's a convenient arrangement for him, why would he have any incentive to change it now? ... (read in full...)
Breasts are sore and getting firm, could the pill be the reason?
Q. my breast are sore and getting firm im on the pill could this be the cause of it...
A. 5 July 2010: Yes. It's due to the hormones, you're probably still adjusting to them. Have a word with your doctor about it anyway though, just to be sure.... (read in full...)
Why would he want a special friendship?
Q. I have met this guy and I really liked him (because there's no reason not to like him) but from the very start, he made it clear that he doesn't want a relationship right now and that he is being friends with me and nothing more. But most of the ...
A. 4 July 2010: He clearly wants to be friends with benefits, and nothing more. Tisha and oldersister are absolutely right, he's trying to make being 'special friends' seem to be more than what it really is, because he knows you'd say no to the bare truth. He only ... (read in full...)
He disses me in front of my girlfriend!
Q. I am a 22 year old guy and I have a problem with one of my guy friends. When he and I hang out, he is is regular self, and we get along fine. But whenever my girlfriend is around, he acts like a show-off and is really rude and mean to me. He a...
A. 4 July 2010: It's definitely his attempt to make himself look better to her, as well as boost his own ego. Like the other posters have said, talk to him about it, make it clear it pisses you off. If he doesn't change, you need to consider whether or not it's ... (read in full...)
I have feelings for a coworker, is it a good idea to get close to his friend in hopes of getting closer to him?
Q. Well i have been at this company for a few years..i always thought this one guy was good looking and had a good personality as well..just genuinly friendly it seems and very good at work--remains focused and motivated..he is pretty popular in the ...
A. 4 July 2010: You're really overanalyzing the situation, don't worry so much about small details and what he might think. He might've picked up on that at some point and found it off-putting. Try to keep your conversations and overall attitude towards him light ... (read in full...)
Is he just going through the motions to keep me close and have a potential sugardaddy?
Q. I'm a single, successful single company manager and have been seeing a 23 year old guy for about a year. He's cute, bright, charming and i enjoy our time together a lot. In spite of my initial hesitation because of our age gap (... and don't give me ...
A. 4 July 2010: Yes. A relationship isn't meant to be one-sided, and this one clearly is. You deserve more than the bare minimum you're getting from him. ... (read in full...)
I made a big mistake by having sex, my fling started to ignore me
Q. had a fling with a guy for 2months who recently chatting up a girl in front of me on the street 2 weeks ago, and has the cheek to call me asking if he can see me cos he wants sex. so i told to f off then he said don't talk be talking to me that, ...
A. 1 July 2010: Isn't it the other way around? It doesn't sound like he's bothering to contact you any more, you're the one calling and texting him. Either way, it's obvious all he wants is sex, and he even told you so. Drop him, cut off all contact, and find ... (read in full...)
What does he mean? Is he still interested?
Q. So, i've been texting this guy for 2 months. I never see him much because we're both busy. When i do see him, we wave, smile, and talk for a few minutes. Anyways, when we text, we have real conversations- we ask eachother questions and really get to ...
A. 1 July 2010: If he was really interested, he would make definite plans with you, or at least give a clearer answer. The answer he gave you seems pretty vague and dismissive to me, try backing off for a while and see what he does. If he wants to see you, he'll ... (read in full...)
Why do some people play mind games and act immature with others?
Q. Why do some people play mind games and act immature with others? I recently had a "fling" with a guy who was married and had a baby on the way. From the beginning, this guy almost knew exactly how to my feelings and emotions. He gave me attention ...
A. 24 June 2010: I'm guessing he just wanted sex.... (read in full...)
I think my boyfriend might be gay! What signs should I look for?
Q. i am a bit worried about my boyfriend, as i think he is gay, been together 2 years and he tells me everyday that he loves me, he always wants sex with me most the time and he mainly makes the first moves, he kisses me alot and holds me all night, ...
A. 24 June 2010: Just because he's organized and particular about certain things doesn't mean he's gay. A gay man wouldn't be regularly having sex with you, let alone initiating it frequently.
While there's always a chance he might be bi, it doesn't sound li... (read in full...)
I'm a bit hurt that he's hooking up with others too
Q. I'm a college student, and I've been hooking up with this guy for the past few months whenever we are near each other (he goes to school across the country but lives near my school) and he's made it seem as though he likes me as more than just a ...
A. 24 June 2010: If he liked you as more than a casual hook up, he would be treating you as more than just that. Move on, he's not going to want more.... (read in full...)
Is he being fair?
Q. Hi there, I have a problem with my bf whom I met online last year. I'm 31 and he is 43. When we met he knew I had 2 kids, 1 who is 14 and the 18mths baby. The problem I have with my bf is he does not want my daughters father to be anywhere near his ...
A. 24 June 2010: Get rid of him. You should never, ever have to choose between a relationship and your children. Besides, children must always come first, there are no exceptions. This man has serious issues.... (read in full...)
I'm 16 and allowed to date older guys, but how do I explain to people like my family he's 28?!
Q. I really need some help!! I've fallen for a 28 year old guy and i'm 16. i've liked him since we were 14 and we joked we would get together. now im 16 I really want to date him and get to know him as a boyfriend. He's fine with it, its just I'm ...
A. 24 June 2010: Do you really know, or are you too focused on the older guy to notice?
I'm also just saying, in all honesty, a relationship between a 28 year old and a 16 year old is not right. It can't be excused as 'two people in love', because it really i... (read in full...)
What's the hang-up on swallowing?
Q. It probably has been answered already, but what is the real hang up on women not wanting to swallow a man's ejaculation. Taste? Contents? Etc. Also, if you are going to let them cum in your mouth, what's the difference? Men go down on women and ...
A. 24 June 2010: It's unpleasant, period. Women not only taste completely different, but also don't produce quite as much 'fluid' as men. There's also the fact that with women it's gradual, and with men it's quite a lot all at once.... (read in full...)
If he loves me then why aren't we together?
Q. My exboyfriend and i had a break up but we never really got closure. We still hang out and hook up every once in a while. He is "talking" to another girl and one day when we were arguing he said his feelings are stronger for her than they are for ...
A. 24 June 2010: I agree with CaringGuy and Marialatin, he's trying to keep you around as a backup plan in case it doesn't work out with someone else. Cut off all contact as soon as you possibly can.... (read in full...)
Is he looking for a 'booty call'?
Q. I haven't seen my ex in a year and half.he owes me some money so we have had limited contact through text messages. I haven't seen him since and he probably wouldn't recognise me as i look different He recently phoned me and wanted to know h...
A. 23 June 2010: Yes, definitely a booty call. You did the right thing and didn't give in to it, though! I've lost count of how many people I've seen ask the same question, only after they've slept with the guy.
... (read in full...)
He's with another woman, but still comes to me to talk about sex!
Q. Hello there, I am 29 years old and I am a sensual woman, I like everything that has to do with sex and I am quite open about that fact. I have slept with a lot of guys in my past and I have very little constraint. I like to try a lot of things an...
A. 23 June 2010: I'm glad to help. If you want to discuss it further, feel free to PM me.... (read in full...)
I want to be at my best for a wedding, but this birth control pill is making me nauseous!
Q. Hi :) I recently started taking the pill, and by recently I mean i've taken it twice! And right now i'm feeling very nauseous. I knew this was a side effect, and I knew i'd be likely to get it as I usually get nauseous from antibiotics and strong p...
A. 23 June 2010: It depends on which brand you're taking, but in my experience, the nausea doesn't go away right away. Your body is adjusting to the hormones, and it can take six months to a year to fully adjust.
I was constantly nauseous during the first thre... (read in full...)
He's with another woman, but still comes to me to talk about sex!
Q. Hello there, I am 29 years old and I am a sensual woman, I like everything that has to do with sex and I am quite open about that fact. I have slept with a lot of guys in my past and I have very little constraint. I like to try a lot of things an...
A. 23 June 2010: The reason I said he likely doesn't respect you is due to your statement that he supposedly didn't have feelings for you, yet still slept with you. If he really respected you, you would be his first and foremost right now rather than a friend he ... (read in full...)
He's with another woman, but still comes to me to talk about sex!
Q. Hello there, I am 29 years old and I am a sensual woman, I like everything that has to do with sex and I am quite open about that fact. I have slept with a lot of guys in my past and I have very little constraint. I like to try a lot of things an...
A. 23 June 2010: "But I do not understand what is happening here. Why does he do that? Does he maybe just see me as an easy sex toy? He knows he can "have" me and that sometimes is what turns him on."
That's your answer. It doesn't matter how much he's with his... (read in full...)
I'm 16 and allowed to date older guys, but how do I explain to people like my family he's 28?!
Q. I really need some help!! I've fallen for a 28 year old guy and i'm 16. i've liked him since we were 14 and we joked we would get together. now im 16 I really want to date him and get to know him as a boyfriend. He's fine with it, its just I'm ...
A. 23 June 2010: There are several reasons why we aren't thrilled about your relationship with this man. Just as another comment says, what would a 28 year old want with a 16 year old? You two are in completely different stages of life, the fact that you love him ... (read in full...)
Would a destination wedding solve our family problems?
Q. My boyfriend and I are planning our wedding, however our relatives and friends live interstate. We have problems with his parents (his mums doesnt approve of a mixed relign marriage) and my Father wont step foot in a church . We have only been p...
A. 23 June 2010: This is YOUR wedding, you shouldn't have to plan it around anyone else but yourselves. If your relatives refuse to reach a compromise for just *one* day of their lives, what are you two going to do, not get married at all?
Although I don't th... (read in full...)
Am I a bad girlfriend for not wanting him to have long hair?
Q. I really, really don't want my boyfriend to grow his hair long. I don't think I can explain how awful it looks. lol Even his old facebook photos have comments by his friends that his hair looked terrible. I didn't say much when he told me he had p...
A. 23 June 2010: No, you're not a bad girlfriend. If you really dislike how he looks with long hair, say so. It's your opinion, just as it's his choice whether or not he accepts it.... (read in full...)
How do I go about breaking up with him when he doesn't want a relationship?
Q. I've been seeing this man for almost four months and I really, really like him. But, I'm not his girlfriend-he claims not to want one. He does the sweetest things for me, always ready to help and/or soothe me. He always misses me and I miss him too ...
A. 23 June 2010: If you'd like to stay friends, you need time apart so both of you can get over the romantic feelings you have for each other. Once things cool down, give friendship a try.... (read in full...)
Why do guys not show feelings?
Q. I was wondering why is it that guys do not show feelings. They act cold and like they could care less. Me and my boyfriend recently broke up 2 months ago. We spent a lot of time together and got close. We had a lot of good times together. I know I ...
A. 23 June 2010: Usually, the one doing the dumping has already gotten over the loss because they know what's to come long before the relationship ends, while the one getting dumped is caught off guard and feels as though the change is very sudden. This is why he's ... (read in full...)
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