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*oublejack

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Since I found out about her history I'd like her to get tested

Q.   Hello all! I come with a questions and concern. My girlfriend and I have been dating for a few months now and it's been great, I know I love her and I know I will spend the rest of my life with her. The problem is, I knew her back in grade sch...

A.   20 February 2013: "Is 80 a outrageous high number?" For a girl in that age bracket, 22-25, I think yes, that is a high number. If she has been sexually active for about 10 years, say from 15 to 25, that is averaging 8 guys a year. There's no two ways about it, t... (read in full...)

Is our hight difference causing our problems with some sexual positions?

Q.   hi, im 5ft3 and my this guy im seeing is 5ft11, we havent reached the bf and gf step yet as we're both working non stop and meet only for 1hr or 2 sometimes. there's a substantial height different between us, we stuggle to have sex because of the h...

A.   27 November 2012: No, height is not an obstacle to basic sexual positions such as the ones you have attempted. Height disparity can be an issue for some positions, notably those that involve standing, but in such cases the issue leads to no penetration (because the ... (read in full...)

How can we get our sex back on track so we're both climaxing?

Q.   I'm a bit sexually frustrated. My husband doesn't last a long time in bed these days. When we used to have sex more frequently, it was rarely an occurrence, but now, he might last a minute or two, not enough time for me to climax. He's not into the ...

A.   7 November 2012: OK OP, with the additional information you have given I have a few suggestions. I know that frequency of sex generally slows down as a relationship goes on, but there are ways you can still enjoy sex and have an orgasm without doing it twice a ... (read in full...)

I suggested he be tested for STD's before I sleep with him and he took offence...

Q.   I am a 23 year old virgin and I'm dating a 24 year old guy,the reason I stressed on being a virgin is that I've waited for the right man to come along and I think he has, and I know it will happen soon.. but now I think he's not the one, cuz he took ...

A.   7 November 2012: You didn't do anything wrong, that was an awful reaction from your boyfriend. He had no right to be that offended. He knows you are a virgin, and are STD free. Even if he has been careful, there is a risk that he could be harboring something with no ... (read in full...)

He's looking at Porn every night. Is this what men do or is this unacceptable?

Q.   Mondote: Please provide your age next time you ask a question to help people who answer your question/s. Been with C for 8years, lived together for 5years and have an 8month old baby. Always had arguments about porn with empty promises about not wa...

A.   26 October 2012: A lot of men watch porn on the internet. So many, in fact, that I have to say it is generally accepted as OK behavior. That doesn't mean all men watch porn or that every woman accepts the practice. There are exceptions. The majority of men, and a ... (read in full...)

Older guys want me, but with guys my age I strike out! Why am I unlucky in love?

Q.   This is not a specific question but just something I have been mulling over lately. I am 42 years old and have always been unlucky in love. I have a good job, I'm a nice person, not bad looking and without blowing my trumpet I think I have alot ...

A.   9 October 2012: I agree with the first anonymous male poster. Men over 40 prefer dating a younger woman. This is especially true if they have waited to settle down and start a family, but it holds even if that is not a consideration. The flip side of the coin is ... (read in full...)

Have the wife and kids, but still dreaming about the chance I never took with my soul mate.

Q.   I have been dealing with confusion and pain for about a year and a half now. I am at a point that I need to make a decision to leave my wife or continue to try to be in love with her. I am 35 and have been married for the last 10 years with tw...

A.   9 October 2012: My advice is, if you are truly unhappy in the marriage then you need to follow through and seek a divorce. I know how difficult it is, having gone through one myself. On days that I don't have my daughter I miss her. So not seeing your children ... (read in full...)

Have you ever caught your spouse, fiance or boyfriend perving on high school girls and I found his porn stash

Q.   When we go out to eat at a local restaurant (it's a small rural town) I noticed that my boyfriend will stare over quite a lot at the local waitresses teenage daughter who is 17 when the daughter decides to come into the restaurant to see her mother ...

A.   9 October 2012: Is he coming across as a pervy old creepy dude... or IS he a pervy old creepy dude? OP, from your description I'm thinking this is the latter. He stares at all women? And he basically drools at underage girls? That's gross, and disturbing. How ... (read in full...)

Is it ok to send him one last text asking what happenend?

Q.   I started dating a guy about a month ago. It seemed like he was very into me. He told me he was excited to have me in his life. He would text me good morning every day and send me texts throughout the day and at night he would text me good night. ...

A.   9 October 2012: I honestly would not bother, OP. There are several red flags with this guy. 1. From your description, he was a little too over zealous. He only started dating you a month ago, and was already saying things like he was excited to have you in his ... (read in full...)

I always have to prompt b/f to wear a condom. Is this normal?

Q.   Hi, Hope you can help. I have recently started a new relationship with a guy. Now I am not very sexually experienced but know we have to be careful, so am on the pill. Everytime we slept together I have had to prompt my boyfriend to wear a condom...

A.   5 October 2012: OP, I don't put an excessive amount of the blame for this on the guy. I think some of the response have been way off base. Comparing him to Assange? Bad form. I think the issue is some are not putting themselves in the frame of mind a young male ... (read in full...)

What would you do if you got home from work with a woman wanting to take control and knowing you will have a good night?

Q.   okay Gentlemen this is for you? and I want an honest answer. I recently ordered handcuffs and a spanker for my lover and I to enjoy, I didn't realise it would come so soon. And I like the whole 50 shades of grey idea and my love does too! I sent...

A.   4 October 2012: It depends on the guy. I am dominant, not submissive, so this would not work for me. There are many guys that like to be dominated, though, I happen to not be one of them. If my girlfriend bought cuffs and a paddle I would assume they were for me to ... (read in full...)

My daughter is dating a man who could be her dad

Q.   My 34 year old daughter is getting a divorce from her husband that is 34 also. She is now dating a man that is 57 years old. Does anyone have any advice? He is almost as old as her dad...

A.   27 September 2012: The advice I have is to be open minded about it. Your daughter is an adult, so she is free to date who she chooses. If this guy makes her happy, then that is what should matter most to you, right? I am a man that is close to your daughter's age (I ... (read in full...)

What's the best way to tell him you like him?

Q.   okayy, peeps--this question is gonna be short, sweet, and to the point. i'm mainly looking for male opinions here, but females...feel free to put your two cents in as well. ") what is the best way for a girl to tell a guy that she likes him? shoul...

A.   26 September 2012: This depends on how well you know this guy, and what kind of relationship you have with him. I mean relationship in the sens of is he a friend, acquaintance, or just someone you see at a particular place? I think the *only* scenario where y... (read in full...)

Should I let go and move on or fight for him?

Q.   My boyfriend and I have been going out for a year now. He is an Anglican while I am a Catholic. Met his parents on three occasions and they looked forward to having family lunch/dinner with me to also get to know me better and more. The problem is ...

A.   25 September 2012: Your boyfriend is 27 years old. What church he goes to, or whether he goes to church at all, are his choices to make. Honestly OP, I have to advise you break up with this man. I find it alarming that at age 27 his parents have that much influenc... (read in full...)

Anal sex makes me feel like I'm being ripped in half!

Q.   Hey everyone i have a question, my husband and i decided that we want to try anal, we use a lott of lub and go nice and slow but i cant stand the pain it just makes me want to scream. It feels like im being ripped in half, hes being patient with me ...

A.   25 September 2012: Actually there is one helpful suggestion I can make, and that is to stretch the anus out gradually before attempting intercourse. Lube up a butt plug and incorporate it into foreplay. It should be gradually inserted, perhaps while your partner gives ... (read in full...)

What is everyone's take on your boy/girlfriend being friends with their ex's?

Q.   So I've got a very basic question and would appreciate all the feedback I can get. I've been seeing my girlfriend for 3 months now, and minus a few bumps in the road here and there, we have a very stable, healthy relationship and a lot of trust in ...

A.   25 September 2012: My general rule is that I do not remain friends with ex's. The only ex I have any contact with at all is my ex-wife, and that is only because we have a child together. If we didn't, I would have no contact with her as well. As it is I keep contact ... (read in full...)

Why wont men try and be friends with women they are not attracted to?

Q.   I saw a question on here that made me think, and made me want to ask one of my own. Why is it that women will try to be friends with men who they aren't attracted to, but men won't try to be friends with women they aren't attracted to? I know this ...

A.   25 September 2012: "Anyway, if you are a man who does this to women, why do you do it?" OP, the honest answer is very simple - men have guys to hang out with or talk to if we want friendship. A majority of the time it is easier to hang out with other guys becau... (read in full...)

This picture pops up on Facebook of my boyfriend and this girl looking like a couple....is it reasonable for me to have a problem with this photo?

Q.   Hi, so my boyfriend just came back off holiday, we've been quite rocky for a while but since he came back we've been really happy havnt argued once until this photo was uploaded on facebook. I just want advice on whether I'm being in reasonable with ...

A.   21 September 2012: OP, that sure sounds like a couples holiday. Your boyfriend's brother went with his girlfriend, and it was just coincidence that your boyfriend was there with another girl, his brother's girlfriend's friend? Then there is an incriminating pic of the ... (read in full...)

Need a Older Man's Opinion

Q.   I met a single man(in this 30's) last year from canada and we have been in contact for 1 year now. We only met once and had a great time and chemistry and everything(did not do anything with him at all, I'm more respectable). So, now he emails me ...

A.   18 September 2012: Yes, OP. Accept his apology and move on, as in lose his information and forget that you ever knew him. He made it quite clear, in a crude manner, what he was looking for - he wanted to come to NY, hang out with you and have sex. Nothing more and ... (read in full...)

Boyfriend feels neglected because I'm spending time with another friend. Views please?

Q.   Hey everyone, I am 23 years old and my boyfriend is 26 nothing significant there but I thought of mentioning it cuz my boyfriend has been acting really immature these days.. I have a best guy friend we go bowling,dinner's lunch we have a lot of fu...

A.   18 September 2012: OP, I am not fond of opposite sex friendships. The reason for that is because I have had too many women cheat on me to believe that everything is harmless, or that in a moment of loneliness things won't get out of hand. I have also had friendships ... (read in full...)

Should I break up with the love of my life?

Q.   I don't know what to do. My relationship has gone in a downward spiral from the minute it started. We met while I was visiting the East Coast from the West Coast. He moved to the West Coast for a job, and for me. We lived together in a nice little ...

A.   18 September 2012: OP, I am going to be completely honest and tell you that I stopped reading your story when I got to the part where you said this: "The only time he was functional in life and happy was when he was doing heroin." I will level with you - your ... (read in full...)

Need some suggestions on toys/lube. Help!

Q.   What is the best brand of silicone based lube to buy? Opinions? Also what is the best/most reputable brand of vibrators or toys to buy and what should i look for when buying one? I have a hard time acheiving orgasm and have never rly bought good ...

A.   13 September 2012: Partners have given me good feedback on KY Intrigue, so that is the lube I recommend. It is silicone based, so is OK with latex condoms. I have found it works well for vaginal and anal intercourse, and has good staying power for longer sex sessions. ... (read in full...)

Can she really be faithful to me?

Q.   I am currently living with my girlfriend whom I've been dating for nearly a year now and she is pregnant with our first child. We fell in love while she was married to another man. I've always been slightly worried if she cheated on him she is ...

A.   12 September 2012: I wish I had something else to tell you OP, but my experience with this type of scenario indicates that yes your girlfriend absolutely can cheat on you, too. When I met my ex-wife she was living with and engaged to another man. There were problems ... (read in full...)

Why do guys always read into things too much?

Q.   I have got some guy friends.I see most of them in a strict platonic way.I'm always friendly to them but NOT flirty.We talk,hang out and laugh together. However,when I start talking to them more often(especially if we're good friends/close fr...

A.   11 September 2012: The flip side of the advice given so far is that perhaps you are misreading these guys, OP. Men truly do hate it when they show interest in a woman and give her signs that they'd like to date, only to have her as nothing more than a friend. Guys do ... (read in full...)

Open relationship mess.

Q.   I'm 27 and got married at the age of 19.I've been with my husband since I was 14 years old, it was the first relationship for both of us. He really loved me alot, treated me like a pricess, spoiled me and gave me everything I wanted. I loved him and ...

A.   30 August 2012: I'm sorry to say this OP, but you opened Pandora's box and there is no closing it now. You probably hurt your husband very badly when you slept with the other man, and since you had already grown somewhat distant by that time it became his breaking ... (read in full...)

I'm not in a position where I can get a divorce but I want to get to know this other man. I'm very unhappy and don't know what to do.

Q.   I am 28 and have been married for 5 years. I was good at first. But when I got pregnant with our first child my husband starting watching porn. Without getting into massive detail, I eventually confronted him about it and told him how I felt. After ...

A.   30 August 2012: OK, there is simply no way to have a "trial run" with someone while you are married. That is cheating, period. Even if you aren't having sex you are emotionally cheating. Furthermore, it is living a fantasy. Until you are on your own and truly ... (read in full...)

I had 12 sexual partners in the 4 years prior to my steady relationship. Is that bad? And why did a doctor conclude my relationship wasn't monogamous without asking?

Q.   Yesterday I had my annual, I was expecting to get on the Mirena (birth control IUD that last 5 years) but when the dr came back she said that I couldn't get it because I'm not a good candidate for it, being as its for people who are in monogamous ...

A.   29 August 2012: I will first start by saying I'm not a doctor, so don't take this as the only possible explanation. Often an unusual pap smear is caused by HPV, which is the most common STD. It often shows no symptoms in men, but can result in abnormal cells on a ... (read in full...)

He can't ejaculate inside me?

Q.   Okay, I've been with this guy for over a year and have been sexually active from about 4 months in - we were both virgins. Anyway, when we have sex he never finishes inside me, and pulls out - even if we use condoms. He's scared of me getting pr...

A.   27 August 2012: I think this is normal, especially for a guy who doesn't have much experience and is very cautious about pregnancy. As long as your boyfriend is pulling out right before he finishes, instead of a minute or more before he finishes, then it is fine. ... (read in full...)

I'm developing feelings for my casual fling but he doesn't want the same. How do I end it?

Q.   Hello, This is my first time on the site and I am hoping for some guidance with my situation. I am 40 years old and struck up a 'casual dating relationship' with a guy 5 years younger than me about 3 months ago. We both entered the situation with o...

A.   27 August 2012: Thank you for the follow-ups. I have to agree with your conclusion, you got your answer without even asking. Actually that is the best way because you know it is truly the way he sees you, since he felt comfortable letting it out without being pr... (read in full...)

I'm developing feelings for my casual fling but he doesn't want the same. How do I end it?

Q.   Hello, This is my first time on the site and I am hoping for some guidance with my situation. I am 40 years old and struck up a 'casual dating relationship' with a guy 5 years younger than me about 3 months ago. We both entered the situation with o...

A.   24 August 2012: OP, I think in this situation the only thing you can do is be direct. I know you don't want to deliver an ultimatum, but you do want a proper relationship, not to continue on in a FWB situation. If you are starting to develop feelings and it has ... (read in full...)

What makes girls act like this?

Q.   Hey guys. Thanks for ur answers because im in desperate need for advice. I had been talking to this girl for about a month and everything's was fine. We talked daily and went to see a movie a.couple weeks after seeing eachother, her friends ...

A.   24 August 2012: Yeah, I'm sorry but I have heard all sorts of excuses, too. How difficult is it to pick up the phone and send a simple text? It would only have taken her 30 seconds. She chose to ignore you for that time. She doesn't want you thinking that she... (read in full...)

Pointers for a virgin having sex for the first time!

Q.   Hey I want your advice on how will I know I'm ready for sex. I want to have sex, but I think it will be really embarrassing and awkward, is it normal to think this? I'm 20 and a virgin with a boyfriend. Any tips or pointers for a virgin? Thank...

A.   24 August 2012: The most important tip - make sure to use protection. He should be wearing a condom that was recently purchased and never stored in a wallet. It should be opened and put on as part of foreplay, in a careful manner so not as to damage it or injure ... (read in full...)

Wife cheated and I can't stop thinking about it when we are apart

Q.   My wife cheated on me a few weeks ago, we are working through it and i really do want this to work. The problem is not when we are together but when we are apart. I cant stop thinking about it! How do i stop and move on? This is starting to chew me ...

A.   24 August 2012: OP, I have to agree completely with Cerberus. My ex-wife cheated on me, and that is why she is my ex. I caught her once, forgave her and attempted to pick up the pieces, and caught her again 3 years later. From what I learned during that experience ... (read in full...)

I'm 24 years older than him but am so attracted to him! What do I do about it?

Q.   OK this is a question that I hope all you male readers out there will chime in on, as I need a man's perspective. I am a 54 year old woman, routinely told I look at least 10 years younger. I keep my hair colored, exercise every day, try not to dress ...

A.   23 August 2012: I see things like pinktopaz does. This man has taken his grandma to get her hair done for 3 years, which is how you first met him. That shows what kind of caring, selfless person he is. If he sees you in a motherly way, then that could easily ... (read in full...)

My wife was intimate with someone else while we were separated. How do I get past this?

Q.   So My wife and I of just over a year have been separated(distance) since April. During that time we talked on the phone, texts, skype. It seemed like everything was going ok, we were both heartbroken and sad to be away from each other, but we were ...

A.   22 August 2012: OP, unfortunately I found myself in your shoes some years ago. The difference in my situation was that my ex traveled for work, so we weren't away for more than 2-3 weeks at a time and she was the one "away" from me. She cheated with several ... (read in full...)

Gents, is your 2nd erection/orgasm as good as 1st when in quick succession?

Q.   Guys, When you have a 2nd session of intercourse in quick succession do you feel same/similar feelings? We often go for a 2nd round and though I enjoy it it's HERE near as good as the first round. Maybe it's to do with timing and I need a bigg...

A.   22 August 2012: For me it depends. I usually have no trouble getting a second erection, although if I'm very tired or have had a few drinks that may be a question mark. The second session of sex can range from less pleasureful than the first - sometimes I get ... (read in full...)

Am I waisting my time with this, should I just end things now?

Q.   Im going to try to keep this as brief as i can lol I met this guy at a party about 4 weeks ago hes 25 im 20. He asked me for my number which i was was very shocked at because i didnt think he was looking at me like that. During the night we pla...

A.   22 August 2012: Ajusayin, unfortunately all the sings indicate that this guy is only interested in sex, and not a relationship. I feel strongly that this is not the right guy for you. I'm sure you have had plenty of opportunities to have sex by now, yet you have ... (read in full...)

How can I focus on getting to know a guy so it leads to more than just sex?

Q.   I'll try to make this short, thanks for the advice in advance. I dated this guy for a couple weeks but we ended up breaking it off. He asked me about it later and I was honest and said that I didn't want to date him anymore, he said he would be...

A.   22 August 2012: First, if the guy offered a FWB situation then you almost have to assume he is OK with that. You made it clear you don't want to date him, so you shouldn't feel guilty. If you want to keep the sex only arrangement and not lead him on that it could ... (read in full...)

What makes girls act like this?

Q.   Hey guys. Thanks for ur answers because im in desperate need for advice. I had been talking to this girl for about a month and everything's was fine. We talked daily and went to see a movie a.couple weeks after seeing eachother, her friends ...

A.   22 August 2012: Sometimes people blow hot and cold. Perhaps she was interested, but either she changed her mind or someone else has caught her eye. All we can do is speculate as to why this girl is no longer keen on you. There's a big jump from the time two peo... (read in full...)

Men: When you have sex, how often are you thinking of someone that you're not with?

Q.   These questions are mostly for men but women can feel free to answer as well: 1. When you have sex with your gf or wife, how often do you picture another woman in your head while doing it? 2. Who are they? (friends, women you saw on the s...

A.   22 August 2012: 1. This has only ever happened to me when I'm not that attracted to the person I'm with. I don't get into relationships that start out that way, but I've had a couple of ex's put on considerable weight to the point that I was no longer turned on by ... (read in full...)

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