A
female
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:My boyfriend of over 1 year didn't get me a birthday present. It's not the value of the gift or the actual gift that bothers me, it's the fact that he didn't give me anything at all, not even a card. We went out to a casual dinner and he paid, but that's something we do all the time and he typically pays for me. His birthday was a few months ago and I gave him a very thoughtful reasonably priced gift. He didn't mention anything about having something for me but it didn't get here yet etc. I'm going to give it a week but then I want to bring it up to him but I'm not sure how. Should I care that he didn't get me anything? How do I bring this up without offending him? Reply to this Question
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female
reader, xanthic +, writes (8 July 2010):
 Did he even say happy birthday to you? I imagine he considered paying for dinner to be your gift. I personally don't think you should say anything about not getting more than that, because no matter how you phrase it, you're going to come across as materialistic. I'm not saying you are, and you have every right to feel upset he didn't even give you a card, but he's probably not going to take your dissatisfaction well. Instead, why not cut back next time his birthday comes around?
A
male
reader, Boombadaboom  +, writes (8 July 2010):
 Just tell it like it is. You are troubled by the lack of attention more than the gift. You won't offend him if you're not going offensive and if he's wise enough
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A
female
reader, beautybella +, writes (8 July 2010):
I had one of those and i told him exactly like it was that i didn't like it because it feels as though he was thinking of me when i put my all into getting him something on his birthday. Next b-day he got me a diamond bracelet.just tell him.
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A
female
reader, janniepeg  +, writes (8 July 2010):
 Maybe he's a person who doesn't believe in special occasions. A party pooper. I myself hate holidays so I can relate to him. It's not that he doesn't think you are special. To him birthday is just like any other day. He's happy that you gave him a gift on his birthday but deep down inside he's probably feeling what for, how unnecessary. He typically pays for you, so he doesn't sound like a miser. If you can see you and him in the future, mention to him that you and your family are very much into celebrating holidays. Tell him to loosen up. Exchanging gifts can be very fun. Tell him you are brought up to have received gifts all the time and you are not used to him being so indifferent. Maybe he doesn't know what kind of stuff you like. Suggest a thing and ask him to buy it a week before your birthday.
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