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... Send *weet-thing a private message | | | *weet-thing's profile:I'm a 38-year old artist who is a bit of a hopeless romantic. I've had a few long-term relationships, been married, separated, currently going through a divorce but have a wealth of friends and family around me to keep me centered and happy. When I fall in love, I don't play games. I like it all out there in the open and have always respected men that were honest with me.
I hope that my experiences will help others who are going through similar things.
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I feel a chemistry with a man who isn't my husband--is it all in my head?
Q. dear cupid, i'm in a bit of a dilemma, to say the least. i've been married for nearly 7 years though cant say it's been any kind of relationship apart from co parenting for at least 4 and i am terribly lonely and miss love in my life and my husband ...
A. 23 August 2007: The way I see it is you really have two choices here. First you have to figure out if you even love your husband anymore. Because if so, then your first choice is to accept that he has mistrust issues over what he's learned about you recently. It ... (read in full...)
I feel a chemistry with a man who isn't my husband--is it all in my head?
Q. dear cupid, i'm in a bit of a dilemma, to say the least. i've been married for nearly 7 years though cant say it's been any kind of relationship apart from co parenting for at least 4 and i am terribly lonely and miss love in my life and my husband ...
A. 26 June 2007: I know what you are going through, been there myself. Part of me wants to just tell you to ask the guy out for coffee and at least make a new friend. But I know it won't stop there and from my own experience, I can tell you, it will feel wonderful ... (read in full...)
We want to be together for the rest of our lives but we keep arguing due to jealousy.
Q. Hey, I have a problem with my gf, well ex gf. we have been broken up for a few months and recently started talking and trying to sort things out to try and get back together, we both love eachother very much but we dont know if the other can change ...
A. 26 June 2007: You are not crazy, you are in love. I worry though, she is all wrong for you -- but this is something you will have to go through the hard way. Rarely when we love someone so much can we pull away even though the signs are all there. We just want ... (read in full...)
Both women are lovely and are in love with me...so what should I do??
Q. Hi, I have been single for a couple of years and meeting women on dating sites. Ultimately have been looking for a serious relationship. 6 weeks ago met a wonderful woman and we really hit it off and feel we are in love. We are going as slowly a...
A. 26 June 2007: Well there you go, sounds like you have been able to come to a decision and I'm glad if I helped in any way. If I were you, given these torn circumstances, I wouldn't rush into matrimony with either of them. Start seeing #1 exclusively and let the ... (read in full...)
I feel a chemistry with a man who isn't my husband--is it all in my head?
Q. dear cupid, i'm in a bit of a dilemma, to say the least. i've been married for nearly 7 years though cant say it's been any kind of relationship apart from co parenting for at least 4 and i am terribly lonely and miss love in my life and my husband ...
A. 25 June 2007: You my dear, have fallen prey to the attention of another man because your husband is no longer making you feel loved. You are emotionally starving to connect with someone because your husband is not treating you with the kind of loving and warmth ... (read in full...)
I can't stop cheating--why?
Q. I'm a young woman who has committed the cardinal sin of cheating. When my boyfriend and I broke up over a year ago, I had a fling with a man from work. Once we got back together, moved back in together, I slept with this man again. I was guilt ...
A. 25 June 2007: Some women are caught in the trap of wanting to settle down with a man who is good for them (and good to them)while also wanting the kind of man that makes their hearts pound!! And I've found that these two qualities rarely exist in the same man. ... (read in full...)
He isn't affectionate and said he doesn't care about sex--is this a permanent thing?
Q. Back in December a guy I had met through friends asked me if I wanted to start a band, as he plays guitar and I sing and am learning guitar. It was just an acoustic thing to play locally. We started practicing a lot and became great friends,...
A. 25 June 2007: He sounds very confused. If you haven't already done so, it's time to tell him how you feel. Perhaps in the past when he's been in a relationship, it has ended badly; too much need for control, jealousies, disagreements, or getting bored. So he ... (read in full...)
We want to be together for the rest of our lives but we keep arguing due to jealousy.
Q. Hey, I have a problem with my gf, well ex gf. we have been broken up for a few months and recently started talking and trying to sort things out to try and get back together, we both love eachother very much but we dont know if the other can change ...
A. 25 June 2007: I never think it's acceptable for someone to yell and scream at the person they (claim to) love, and call them every name in the book. She sounds a little explosive. I would question how deep her love really is for you. She may not like your ... (read in full...)
Reporting back - I fancy my teacher, she seems to feel the same way.
Q. Me again...The one who fancies teacher, teacher feels same. I just dont know how to get her too stop. Today I was with my girlfriend, I was holdin hands with her and flirting so the teacher could get the message but she just walked faster to ca...
A. 25 June 2007: Have you tried simply ignoring her?....The more you make eye contact, the more you notice what she's doing, the more she thinks you're interested. If you suspect she'll do the back stroke when you confront her, then simply act as though she's not ... (read in full...)
We want to be together for the rest of our lives but we keep arguing due to jealousy.
Q. Hey, I have a problem with my gf, well ex gf. we have been broken up for a few months and recently started talking and trying to sort things out to try and get back together, we both love eachother very much but we dont know if the other can change ...
A. 25 June 2007: Generally trust issues come from past experiences where one or both of you were let down by someone close to you, so you have difficulty trusting others after that. Jealously usually stems from the above. But sometimes people who are not normally ... (read in full...)
I'm in a loveless marriage; should I leave?
Q. Do I abandon a passionless marriage? He loves me, I know -- but he's not in love with me, never has been. And he's trying, he knows we're in deep stuff here. But it's been 20+ years of little romance, an ever-decreasing amount of sex, and such a ...
A. 25 June 2007: I can totally relate to what you're going through. I too have spent 20+ years in a marriage that no longer fits my needs. I married the 'strong-silent-type' so our coversations have always been one-sided. He was always been distant and I haven't ... (read in full...)
Who loses their virginity to two guys?! I'm finding this hard to deal with.
Q. I've been dating a woman for about 3 months who loves sex, and ours is great. But I just found out that she lost her virginity in a threesome with two guys who she then had multiple threesomes with after that. She was 23 at the time and is just over ...
A. 22 June 2007: You say she's not a slut from what you know about her but unfortunately, you've only known her 3 months so there is very little about you that you actually do know. I've been with my b/f for 2 years and I'm still learning, and discovering things ... (read in full...)
I have a massive crush on my maybe married teacher!!!
Q. I have a MASSIVE crush on a male teacher at my school, he's like the fittest person ever, however this is the cause of uncontrollable consequences... For starters, recently i've noticed that whenever i stare at him he looks back - I love this eye...
A. 22 June 2007: I think you should find a counselor or someone you can trust who will help you get over this problem. It's not normal. I mean, yes it's normal to have a crush on someone and think you're world is going to fall apart if you can't be with them (it ... (read in full...)
My is my ex boyfriend constantly keeping in touch with me after our breakup a year ago?
Q. What do you think an ex boyfriend wants when he stays in contact with you for over a year since you broke up (his choice) say once a month just saying hi. Then in the last month he has been texting nearly every day and apologising again for his ...
A. 22 June 2007: It would be wise to stop answering his e-mails, and when he calls don't answer the phone. He'll eventually get the hint. Of you could just come out and tell him to get a life and stop contacting you. If you don't, you will never be able to move on ... (read in full...)
I keep finding problems with my relationship; I feel like a drama queen!
Q. I keep falling into this bad pattern where I significantly endanger my relationship with my boyfriend to the extent that it's almost been over several [between 2 and 4 times, i think 2, within a yr] times. I've never made up drama for the sake of ...
A. 22 June 2007: You didn't really state your specific acts of drama but I think most drama in general comes from a place of insecurity. And he may have been able to forgive and forget up to this point, but it will eventually take its toll on the relationship. The ... (read in full...)
I like an older guy who has a girlfriend--what do I do?
Q. i am 16 and i met this guy who is about 22 or 23, he is perfect in every single way but he has a girlfriend his age. what shall i do, i cant stop thinking about him and when we see each other, we always have a good chat. what shall i do??...
A. 20 June 2007: There's nothing you can do. He's not available to you. End of sentence. Plus you're under age and if he's smart, he wouldn't touch you with a 10-foot pole, less he could be brought up on charges for having sex with a minor. You need to find ... (read in full...)
We had a threesome, now I feel jealous!
Q. My fiance and my best friend have been very lustful for each other ever since the time we had a threesome which I did not enjoy.... recently I found out that he kissed her behind my back and very often they try to touch each other inappropriately. ...
A. 20 June 2007: Sounds like your b/f has been wanting to be with your best friend all along and he simply talked you into trying the threesome so it would be "legit". I would confront him and tell him how you feel. But I seriously doubt it will change the ... (read in full...)
My friends are treating me badly and it makes me snap. What should I do?
Q. I am sick of everyone my friends mostly they are all leaving me out and its making me snap at anyone and leaving me with less and less friends. I am starting to get called names and i stand up to them and they just laugh but i wont tell no one (only ...
A. 20 June 2007: Wake up sweetie, these people are not your "friends". It's time to make yourself unavailable to them and start making new friends. Good luck... (read in full...)
My man is still accepting phone calls from his "psycho" ex! What can I do?
Q. I have been dating a wonderful man for two months. He had a bad relationship with another woman he calls "double lifer", she was engaged to him and another man at the same time and he found out when he talked to the other guy. She married the ...
A. 20 June 2007: He needs to stop talking to his ex!! It's completely unnecessary and since she is used to juggling two men, it's possible she still thinks she can do this. Plus if it's bothering you, it needs to stop. If he doesn't have the balls to tell her to ... (read in full...)
Shave or not to shave? any girls out there go au natural?
Q. I never trim or shave my pubic hair, and have lots of it. You can even see them when I wear panties or a swimmsuit. Most of my friends shave, are there any more girls who like to keep it natural?...
A. 20 June 2007: Don't know, it's not something that comes up in many conversations among women. I personally do not like mine to be that bushy and thick. So I trim it on the sides and cut down on the thickness of it as well so it's not pooching out of my panties ... (read in full...)
I wanted a divorce but it caused hell between our two families... Now I've met someone else and I'm falling for him! What should I do?
Q. I'm married and I don't want to be. I tried getting divorced but both our families as well as my other half made my life hell, so I gave up. I've never believed in cheating. Never understood why anyone would do it. I've found myself in the same ...
A. 20 June 2007: If you are this unhappy, file for divorce. I don't know what kind of hell your families put you through, but it is your life. Tell your new man that you are filing for divorce and ask him if he will be there for you when it's over with. How ... (read in full...)
My boyfriend wants to sleep with another girl. He said that we both can have one person on the side to sleep with.
Q. Okay... My boyfriend just popped this thing on me. He wants to sleep with another girl. He said that we both can have one person on the side to sleep with. We will use protection and we will both know that we are more important than the side people. ...
A. 20 June 2007: Go with your heart. If you have reservations about doing this, I wouldn't do it. There could be serious consequences to your intimacy after you've crossed this line. You may end up feeling quite jealous. I would question why one woman isn't ... (read in full...)
I wonder when it comes to sex, both intercourse and oral how do you make a woman feel like doing it?
Q. My girlfriend and I have been together 3 years now and we have a nice sex life. The only issue is this, early in our relationship she would perform oral sex on me daily and I would maybe weekly on her. Now the tables have turned. I mean she doesn't ...
A. 20 June 2007: I don't think there's much you can to do to "make" anyone feel like doing anything. But here's a few tips. Make sure you're clean. Sweaty smells are a turn off to some women, so be sure you've showered. Make sure your diet is balanced. Believe ... (read in full...)
I am a 12 year old girl and I really want to have sex with my boyfriend who is 14. Should I do it with him?
Q. I am a 12 year old girl and I really want to have sex with my boyfriend who is 14. He wants me to come over to night and have sex with him. Should I do it with him?...
A. 19 June 2007: I know you are not going to want to hear this....but no, no a thousand times, no. Please do not have sex because believe it or not, you will regret it. I had sex for the first time when I was 15 and I have always wished I would've waited a couple ... (read in full...)
Why would he do all these nice things with me when he's interacting with another married woman?
Q. why would a man introduce you to his kids, mother tell you he loves you every single day, spend time with you every night and all weekend, make plans for the future and the whole time he's decieving you by interacting with a married woman he works ...
A. 19 June 2007: His married lover was probably looking for a fling and he was flattered to be the lucky bloke she picked. Too many men do not know how to say 'no' to this type of temptation. It is unfortunate that he hurt you and lost a great gal in the process. ... (read in full...)
Both women are lovely and are in love with me...so what should I do??
Q. Hi, I have been single for a couple of years and meeting women on dating sites. Ultimately have been looking for a serious relationship. 6 weeks ago met a wonderful woman and we really hit it off and feel we are in love. We are going as slowly a...
A. 19 June 2007: Since you aren't feeling comfortable with juggling two women, you need to make a decision fairly soon. I wouldn't recommend this triangle anyhow because eventually they'll sniff each other out and the whole thing will blow up in your face and you'll ... (read in full...)
Do men who have georgeous girlfriends still fantasize, look at porn or cheat?
Q. Do men who have drop dead gorgeous girlfriends still fantasize about other women, want to look at porn, or cheat? I am an attractive woman and all my boyfriends have looked at other women or porn at some time or another in our relationship(and some ...
A. 19 June 2007: Here's the sad truth. Most men, even when they have the most beautiful woman in the world will still oogle at other women, occasionally watch porn and fantasize about the girl next door. It's part of their ridiculous cosmic chemistry and it drives ... (read in full...)
I have a massive crush on my maybe married teacher!!!
Q. I have a MASSIVE crush on a male teacher at my school, he's like the fittest person ever, however this is the cause of uncontrollable consequences... For starters, recently i've noticed that whenever i stare at him he looks back - I love this eye...
A. 19 June 2007: To begin with, don't be so sure that just because he sees you looking at him, that he really thinks anything about it or is in some way reciprocating your feelings. He's the teacher. I'm sure most of the students are looking at him while he's ... (read in full...)
Both women are lovely and are in love with me...so what should I do??
Q. Hi, I have been single for a couple of years and meeting women on dating sites. Ultimately have been looking for a serious relationship. 6 weeks ago met a wonderful woman and we really hit it off and feel we are in love. We are going as slowly a...
A. 19 June 2007: Perhaps if you weigh their personality characteristics carefully you will find the answer. Girlfriend #1 seemed a little unstable in the beginning. What was she freaking out about? She was listed through a personal dating site. Which means uh, ... (read in full...)
Why could he not get an erection? Maybe I'm not sexy enough for him and maybe I'm not good enough for him?
Q. My boyfriend and I had sex for the first time tonite, well I say had sex, I mean tried!!he had trouble getting it up and then got upset cos it all went wrong. He kept saying it was me not him and I was like okay, but I feel like it was me. Maybe ...
A. 17 June 2007: Nope honey, it wasn't you....but it was. The thing is, guys get more nervous about the "first time" than we realize. The pressure of making it "perfect", making it awesome, or just making it in general is alot of pressure and some guys have ... (read in full...)
My husband turned into a slob that never wants to have sex! How can I help him get back his zest for living?
Q. My husband's personal hygiene is bad. He doesn't change his underwear everyday. I've tried to help him with it, but he just seems to go blank if its mentioned. He gets showered everyday, and uses deodorant but that's about it. He seems to wear the...
A. 7 June 2007: I think your husband may be depressed. The symptoms are all there - lack of interest in normal hobbies, friends, sex, and personal appearances. Talk to him and see if you can figure out what's on his mind. Could he be going through things at work ... (read in full...)
I've had a crush on this guy for FIVE YEARS! How the heck do I get the courage to talk to him and not look like a fool???
Q. It's been 5 years and i STILL havn't got over him!! I saw this guy when i was 11 and me and my friend all thought he was sooo 'hot'. A basic school girl crush, nothing more. I'm very shy, so i never talked to him, but when he saw me (downtown or ...
A. 7 June 2007: Life is all about taking risks. You will never forgive yourself if you don't at least try to get to know this guy. Start by simply saying "hello" and smile at him. Be genuine. Then you could always make a joke about something at the restaurant, ... (read in full...)
All he does is sit in the garage and look at porn - he even does it when his friends come over! Now our sex life is falling apart. Help!
Q. my bf, of 2.5yrs, is addicted to porn- since the beginnig, every chance he gets he's on the computer- you guessed it- watching porn. it's all the time and he of couse denies it- always with an attitude- which is funny(ha) cuz i like porn and have ...
A. 7 June 2007: Your boyfriend needs professional help to get over his addiction, otherwise it will ruin his relationship with you, and any future relationships he plans to have. Porn addictions are like any other form of addiction -- it will eventually take over ... (read in full...)
I think my fiance is cheating on me with my brother's girlfriend! Am I just being paranoid?
Q. hi im in love with my fiancee but im pretty sure he is cheatin on me with my brothers girlfriend,everytime he goes to work he leaves at different times and when my brother is here and his girlfriend is at home my fiancee is always late gettin home ...
A. 7 June 2007: Hmmm, not really sure based on the information you provided. But if your feelings are this strong, maybe it would be good for you to do a little detective work. Follow him. Place yourself in a strategic location to see who he gets into the car ... (read in full...)
Do people judge you on the type of house and family you have? The guy I'm seeing is tasteful and clean, but my house is ugly and messy!
Q. Hey, this is going to sound really superficial and awful of me, but do people judge you on the type of house and family you have? and is it normal to feel scared of being judged on because of this? I'm going out with this guy and i've been to his...
A. 7 June 2007: Unfortunately you can't immediately change your social status. But coming from a poor background myself I was sometimes embarrassed for my dates to come to my home. I have since learned that if someone truly loves you, your background won't ... (read in full...)
I think he thinks the relationship is casual. Do I talk to him or leave it for now?
Q. Here's my problem. I started dating this chap about six months ago, but we haven't progressed past seeing each other once a week (despite living locally). My suspicion is that he views this as a casual relationship so I am going to tackle the is...
A. 7 June 2007: I think if you like this guy you should tell him. Men aren't mind readers and he may be afraid of rejection, so he's afraid to say it first. Just be coy about it, not too over-bearing (you don't want to scare him off)...try inviting him out for ... (read in full...)
My bf of 3 years refuses to attend an important event with me. I have been there for him, in the past...shouldn't he do the same for me?
Q. My boyfriend of almost three years refuses to attend a wedding in my hometown with me. His excuse is that he doesn't want to spend his weekend with a bunch of people he doesn't know. This, to me, spells trouble. The wedding is of my oldest friend ...
A. 7 June 2007: Over-reacting? No. Relationships are about supporting each other and sometimes it means sacrificing our own needs and desires to put the other person first. Especially when it's something that's important to you, as this obviously is. But let's ... (read in full...)
I love her but she wants to be friends!
Q. i made friends with this girl online and we got along so well on msn. then we went out on sunday. really had fun. started texting each other she says she misses me and stuff. and when i asked her for the next date. she says she love to.. but h...
A. 7 June 2007: Just keep doing what you're doing and enjoy what you have with her, even though it's not at the level you'd like for it to be. Maybe eventually her feelings for you will grow too. In the meantime, respect the boundaries and just be friends. It ... (read in full...)
I'm freaking out that I might be pregnant... (but I've never had sex!)
Q. i know im probably completely over reacting but i keep thinking im pregnant i havent had sex at all ever. so why am i thinking this it is making me panick big time is there no other way to be pregnant than having sex ??...
A. 7 June 2007: Nope, no other way. Relax. You're letting your anxieties run away with you. If you haven't had sex, and you haven't been injected by sperm from a sperm bank, trust me you are not pregnant. Your periods may be irregular due to a variety of other ... (read in full...)
Have I Done Something Wrong?
Q. Is it something i'm doing wrong? I started dating a man in the army when i was 17. We spent practically every minute together and got on brilliantly. I stood by him and supported him when he went away on operational tours and we were compleatly ...
A. 7 June 2007: You haven't done anything wrong from what I read and I truly felt your pain. By all means, contact your family the minute they get home, have them come and pick up you and your son, file for divorce immediately, without hesitation and start ... (read in full...)
He refuses to apologize, when he is clearly wrong or offends me. Am I over-reacting?
Q. Hi All, I have been in my relationship for about 3 months now. The problem is that he doesnt feel the need to apologise when he offends me or admit he was wrong. After any quarrel even though he was clearly wrong his replies are that are a...
A. 6 June 2007: Nope. Respect is a huge part of any successful relationship. Your boyfriend's inability or unwillingness to apologize when he's wrong shows a lack of respect for you. And a lack of respect equals a lack of love. This relationship will never ... (read in full...)
Texted my (ex) fiancee pretending to be a friend... and can't come clean now
Q. I split with my fiancee, for no reason at all, he just woke up one day and decided he didnt want to be with me for some random reason. I was sooo angry, I thought I hated him so i wanted to make him pay. So i text him off an old phone pretending ...
A. 6 June 2007: If you feel strongly that you must tell him what you did, know that he will probably use it as just cause to terminate your relationship. So prepare to face the firing squad. Then again, it sounds like he's looking for a reason to bail anyhow. ... (read in full...)
Texted my (ex) fiancee pretending to be a friend... and can't come clean now
Q. I split with my fiancee, for no reason at all, he just woke up one day and decided he didnt want to be with me for some random reason. I was sooo angry, I thought I hated him so i wanted to make him pay. So i text him off an old phone pretending ...
A. 6 June 2007: Ah my dear, he may be setting a trap for you by telling you "your friend" (which is you, of course) is still leaving him messages. He probably suspects it was you all along and is trying to back you into the corner for a confession. There are two ... (read in full...)
We're trying to make this marriage work but he's talking to the other woman. Is he back with me for the wrong reasons?
Q. My husband and I are going through some rough times. We have been married for a little over three years, together for almost six. He cheated on me six times in four years. I forgave him and moved on. One day I took our kids and belongings and ...
A. 6 June 2007: Let's look at the facts: #1. Your husband has cheated on you six times: That alone would be reason enough for me to file for divorce and get out. What are you hanging onto him for? Clearly he doesn't love and respect you anymore. He's tied to ... (read in full...)
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