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... Send *weet-thing a private message | | | *weet-thing's profile:I'm a 38-year old artist who is a bit of a hopeless romantic. I've had a few long-term relationships, been married, separated, currently going through a divorce but have a wealth of friends and family around me to keep me centered and happy. When I fall in love, I don't play games. I like it all out there in the open and have always respected men that were honest with me.
I hope that my experiences will help others who are going through similar things.
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Could my marriage be ending before it even started?!
Q. Hello people! My marriage is currently in a critical state. I separated/strategically ran away from my husband after 5months of our marriage. That short duration was clouded with misunderstandings, i saw his mean, self centred, unempathitic, ...
A. 12 August 2012: If counseling was really an option you probably should have tried that before you ran all the way back to your country. It seems kind of like, why bother now? And why "sweetly" ask him to join you when you "feared for your life" when you were with ... (read in full...)
Should I write this letter to my ex? My friend says no. But I think he deserves it.
Q. I have so much to say to my ex... nothing bad. He was a gentleman til the very end and I wanted to thank him and tell him how sorry I am for not putting my all into the relationship. It will be a kind letter and let him know that maybe our pa...
A. 12 August 2012: If it helps you have closure, what's the harm? Just don't expect him to fall back in love with you or you'll be sorely disappointed.
... (read in full...)
Issues between the co-worker and I. So how do I avoid attending her birthday lunch being organised?
Q. My co-worker and I been working in the same dept. for a long time. We get along ok all these years and I consider her a friend at work. Few months ago, she made a "very offensive" comment about me to other colleague. I was very upset and offend...
A. 11 August 2012: Don't go. There's nothing worse than someone who attends your birthday lunch out of guilt or peer pressure. If she gets upset so what? She didn't hesitate to upset you with her comment. She'll get over it. Maybe she'll learn to keep rude comments ... (read in full...)
My timing has always been off. I think my married friend has feelings for me. How can I best handle this situation?
Q. I find myself in love with someone who is married. he and I have known each other for 15 years and I felt something the first time I met him, but I was engaged. When I got separated he had just gotten married....and so on...timing is awful. I wa...
A. 11 August 2012: He's married so you should leave him alone. If he was truly miserable he would get out. Then you might give it a try. Otherwise once you stop entertaining the idea of hookin up with him you'll be able to focus on the relationship you're sort of in. ... (read in full...)
How can I stop my ex asking me for money?
Q. hi. my ex girlfriend keeps asking me for money for fags and food because i live at home and have no bills to pay and she has her own place with bills and rent but isnt working, she on benefits. she is an ex who i have never lived with and wasnt ...
A. 11 August 2012: Quit replyin. As soon as she sends a text, delete it and move on. Don't answer the phone if she calls. If she leaves a voicemail, delete it too. If she knocks on your door, don't open it. It's pretty simple. You can't stop her from bugging you but ... (read in full...)
Why do I shut my eyes from reality?
Q. i've been off an on with this guy for 8yrs now. i've never been so infactuated with someone like i was for him.turns out that he is controlling,manipulative and emotionally abusive.we break up atleast twice a year because he becomes very short and ...
A. 9 August 2012: It's like my favorite Sheryl Crow song, "You are a raging sea, I pull myself out of every day....I plead insanity cuz' I can't stay but I can't leave." So many of us are in this same situation and I can honestly offer you no specific advise. I ... (read in full...)
Is he having a mid-life crisis? Is this not love?
Q. Because What would a man his age want with a woman like this? Ok well my Ex and I we are split up for about 5 months . We still tells me about his life , and for the past 3 months he is constantly talking about his friend he met for the first time ...
A. 9 August 2012: Mid-life crisis yes very much. Some men hook up with younger women because it keeps them from feeling old. Suddenly they are seeing life through a much younger person which gives them some fresh perspective on things. Plus it's a huge ego boost to ... (read in full...)
Should I forget him as he's not interested and move on?
Q. I feel attracted to a man in my workplace but I have never been able to know how he feels for me. I find it quite difficult to understand his behaviour towards me. At times, I catch him looking at me longingly while at other times he make as if he ...
A. 9 August 2012: Yes forget him. For all you know he already has a girlfriend or wife and this would surely be a dead end for you. Obviously he's not that interested in you and just because he casually glances at you now and then doesn't mean a thing. Are you sure ... (read in full...)
Any suggestion on how to bring my mother to life?
Q. Well, I'm living with a single mom along with my brother. My parents are not exactly divorced, but aren't in good terms and have been living apart for past four years. Now my mom's not really a deep thinker, and there's nothing of art or music tha...
A. 9 August 2012: Take her out with you; go shopping (you might be hunting for a blouse or some jeans) insist that she come along, then take her to lunch, take her window shopping use the time to share things with her and try to get her to open up about what her ... (read in full...)
When is flirting crossing a boundary?
Q. I've been with my bf for several years. There's something that bugs me about him. When we're out, if he sees an attractive woman he'll let her know she's hot with his expression. He'll raise his eyebrows and do something with his eyes, and the woman ...
A. 9 August 2012: Tell me again why you are still with him? Because from what you described I'd kick him to the curb and let him go chase after the next hot thing.... (read in full...)
Have you ever made a difficult decision feeling sure it was right when everyone else thought it was wrong?
Q. I'm so lost right now.. And I'm headed to the worst place I've been in a while.. Since I was about fourteen, I've struggled to honestly love myself. I've suffered from depression as well as multiple eating disorders, one of which lasted for seven ye...
A. 9 August 2012: You are feeling alone because once again you have allowed your insecurities about yourself to cloud your judgement and drive a wedge between the one person who has truly stood by you, in spite of how you have treated him. I think instead of going to ... (read in full...)
Does he still want this to continue?
Q. Hi Aunts. This is about a married man i have been seeing for about 7yrs, No judgements please,but i would like you insight on this He knows that i love him but he will only say to me,you know my situation,I can't give you more than i do,but obvious...
A. 1 August 2012: Sure he wants it to continue, he's got the perfect situation. The wife, the home, the security, and then the naughty sex on the side behind her back. It really doesn't matter if he wants it to continue or not, you obviously do not want to continue ... (read in full...)
Can you tell someone has had anal sex by looking at their bottom?
Q. Hey there everyone! So... I was in a 5-yr-relationship with this guy and we used to have a quite a lot of anal sex. I didn't really like it, but he loved it so I tried to make him happy. Since we broke up I decided I'd never do anal just to make ...
A. 1 August 2012: Maybe. I'm not sure how often you engaged in it over those years, but that muscle can get stretched out and begin to look more "open" than normal. Perhaps though it shrinks back over time. But I agree with chigirl, get a mirror and take a good ... (read in full...)
How did you pick you wedding bands?
Q. Hi! This is a very shallow question but here it is. So, I'm getting married soon. Fiancé and I are going to pick up wedding bands this weekend. We both agreed we like them platinum, but I think I'd rather have it gold, you know, real yellow gold ...
A. 1 August 2012: Well my husband and I both liked gold so there was really no discussion there, and truthfully if I would have had my heart set on silver, or platinum he probably would have gone along without a problem. He never wears his ring anyhow and I think ... (read in full...)
I know the truth, still he tries to blame our son!
Q. My husband of many years has been on the internet chat with numerous girls, but one in particular for years.....I just found out this information of late. My problem is he will not admit to it....he blames it on our son...and calls me sick in the ...
A. 1 August 2012: I am curious....how can you be positive it wasn't your son? If they both use this computer. If they both at least have access to it, what makes you so convinced your son couldn't be responsible? I don't know how old your son is, but often Moms ... (read in full...)
Is it a good idea to go through with this relationship?
Q. I am an american women dating a turkish guy. We have been talking off and on for the past two years. He comes to virginia beach, virginia every summer on a work visa. We were introdued through texting by my brother which is good friends with my ...
A. 31 July 2012: Why not? Just make sure he isn't just wanting a permanent citizenship in this country and you are his meal ticket.... (read in full...)
What are things to consider when planning on getting divorced?
Q. when planning to get divorced, what are the things to consider. My husband and I are separated and I would like to know what to expect if our marriage does not survive, especially from those in the RSA. Thanks......
A. 31 July 2012: You need to start building some credit on your own. Open a few credit card accounts solely in your name. Buy a few things and pay them off pronto. The accounts you own together as a couple, begin to pay them off as well. The less you owe jointly the ... (read in full...)
If I don't fall in love with a girl does that mean I'm gay?
Q. hello there guys im so confused right now because i recently liked a girl and then just stopped suddenly. this is not my problem. my problem is that now im starting to think i will never fall in love with a girl and i really want to and have chi...
A. 31 July 2012: Sometimes we lose interest in a person we thought we wanted to be wth because we realize we don't have alot in common, or you get to know them and realize yo aren't that attracted to them anymore. It doesn't mean your gay. It means that girl wasn't ... (read in full...)
I don't know who the father is, should I terminate or give it up for adoption?
Q. Heya, i just found out I'm pregant but I dont know who the father is, I went to butlins about four weeks ago and I sleet with 3 boys, ( I didn't know them or talk any numbers or anything) a week later I slept with two more boys, ( I know these b...
A. 28 July 2012: Adoption. At least you will not be taking its life and he or she will have a chance at a happy life if you cannot provide it for them.... (read in full...)
What can I wear to hide my tummy? I'm a little chubby. Rest is presentable.
Q. Hey everybody! I would like some help. What can i wear on a date that will hide mt tummy the most? I have a flappy tummy. I'm chubby, got a nice ass. I'm about 1.7m tall. thanks. ...
A. 28 July 2012: Buy a good fitting Spanx. Works wonders to hide tummy bulge and keeps things looking smooth and trim.... (read in full...)
Do girls masturbate?
Q. hi i reacently talked to a good friend whos a girl and she addmited to me this got me wondering.... do other girls masturbate too?...
A. 28 July 2012: Oh yessssss.... (read in full...)
Text How do you know when to let go and move on from a relationship?
Q. How do you know when to let go and move on from a relationship or when to stay with it and move forward? Lots of positives in the relationship, but there are trust issues and I'm learning that we don't communicate well- I don't think he "fights ...
A. 28 July 2012: That is a tough one as I am in the same situation. It is a very personal decision that basically comes down to this; which one outweighs the other? Sometimes you literally have to make a Good/Bad list to see the proof. Be brutally honest. If you ... (read in full...)
LDR boyfriend doesn't know the color of my eyes?
Q. I am in a long distance relationship and I have been for about a year. We've been together in person multiple times so I expected the right answer today when I playfully asked him "What color are my eyes?" I could not believe it when he told me he ...
A. 28 July 2012: Honey I was with my man for roughtly the same amount of time maybe longer and something came up in conversation and I realized he had no clue what color my eyes were. Like you I was shocked and hurt. It's one of the first things I notice about ... (read in full...)
I've known him for years My female friend likes him too. He asked me out. How do we tell my female friend without her getting mad at both of us?
Q. My friend and I both like the same guy. he has known me since the 2nd grade but he has only known her for a couple months. He and I have been talking for a long time and he has liked me for years now and i really like him too. he asked me out...
A. 26 July 2012: It will probably destroy the friendship, at least for awhile. If you've been friends a really long time, she'll get over it and eventually you'll probably be friends again someday. Just don't expect miracles, but the sooner you tell her the better. ... (read in full...)
Why is this man asking me to marry him when he already has a wife and kids?
Q. I met a man online a couple of years ao and I soon found out that he has a family( is married but has not slept with his wife in a loooooomg time because she has gained weight and they also bicker way too much)) so I told him I just wanted to be ...
A. 26 July 2012: If you were really an excuse to leave, he would have already. In fact, men don't need another woman to go to as an excuse. If they are truly miserable, they know very well how to leave. He probably told you this just to keep you tethered to him ... (read in full...)
Am I being unnecesarily jealous or do I have a valid point about her fling from the past contacting her?
Q. Hi all, I'm hoping to receive some impartial advice on a problem I'm experiencing ATM. Been with my GF now for over a year and living with each other for a month. While on holiday it came to my attention that a guy she had 'fun' with between h...
A. 26 July 2012: You have a valid point. Most of us are rarely jealous over a past lover until they come knocking on our present door. Stand your ground. She needs to ditch this guy. ... (read in full...)
I hate this job so much but don't think I should resign
Q. Hi everyone. I just don't know what to do. I've been doing the same thing at work for the past 3 years with no promotion as there are no promotions at the government institutions except if you apply and move out but unfortunately I've tried ...
A. 26 July 2012: Sometimes the best way to grow your career and gain personal growth is to switch jobs every 5 or 6 years, move to different cities too. Each time you change jobs, hopefully it'll be slightly up from what you did before and if nothing else you'll pad ... (read in full...)
Influenced by his new friend, he has filed for divorce!
Q. just over a month ago my husband of almost 12yrs left me we had been together 15yrs.the main problem for me was the fact that my husband had a new friend who would do everything he could to seperate us when we was out on a night our other friends ...
A. 22 July 2012: Sounds to me your husband's friend sweentened the pot by introducing him to a new woman to further convince him to be free. Your husband is quite immature if he still lets his friends talk him into foolish things. You deserve better. Move on sweetie ... (read in full...)
I got dumped for going to a strip club!
Q. Ok I have a girl friend and she broke up with me because I went to a strip club with my friends on a company trip is she over reacting we been dating for 9 months...
A. 22 July 2012: It's a deal breaker for many women. It says you still want to play around, have no intentions on being faithful or trustworthy. It is single man behavior most women wont put up with. Keep that in mind next time you say you want to be in a commited ... (read in full...)
I hate this job so much but don't think I should resign
Q. Hi everyone. I just don't know what to do. I've been doing the same thing at work for the past 3 years with no promotion as there are no promotions at the government institutions except if you apply and move out but unfortunately I've tried ...
A. 22 July 2012: The law if karma will probably solve your dilema and you will most likely get fired. You see when you lose your zest it shows in everything you do. In fact I suspect that's why you cant get a promotion. Whether you realize it or not you are exuding ... (read in full...)
Our date nights are boring, and not what I like to do!
Q. Im having some issues with our date nights. My bf and i live together and have two children. When we have a date night, whether we have a bby sitter or not we tend to do the same things. We either go out to a movie go out to dinner rent a red box ...
A. 21 July 2012: Bowling. Tennis. A community little theater play. (You could go see one, you could audition and both be in one.) A concert. The ballet. Bar hopping. A trendy place to eat or drink that has live jazz music. A comedy show. Or rent a Wii with two ... (read in full...)
I love him but feel he is rushing me into marriage next year. I haven't accepted. Should I accept?
Q. I love my boyfriend so much and he obviously loves me more than i love him.it was him i gave my virginity to. we are both just 17. he proposed to me to marry him.he said he wants us to do it as soon as possible(next year when we turn 18). But i dont...
A. 9 July 2012: You are too young to get married. And clearly not emotionally ready to seal your fate to just one guy when you have no idea what else is out there. Your b/f senses this and that's why he's pressuring you. It's about control. It's about ownership. ... (read in full...)
I'm torn between my long-term abusive ex girlfriend and prospective new girlfriend who seems perfect as of now. What do I do?
Q. Hi All, I dated my ex-girlfriend for almost 5 years. Our relationship was a tumultuous one at the best of times, with a lot of petty fighting and breakups. We were definitely known as a temperamental couple. Over the past year, the severi...
A. 9 July 2012: I think you are addicted to the drama your ex created. Like a junkie you are tethered to an abusive person, thinking you don't deserve someone "normal" but your ex has not changed. This is merely a way to control you, even after the brea up she is ... (read in full...)
I've developed feelings for my friend but don't want to cause problems
Q. please forgive the length please advise i dont understand how ive developed feelings for my good friend. at first we barely spoke as we worked together on a team but not one to one which we have done recently. we have got close in a friendshi...
A. 9 July 2012: Do nothing. He already has a woman and a life with her. If you think 'all is not well' you have probably imagined that as wishful thinking. Just because he compliments you and is polite does not mean you should zoom in on another woman's territory ... (read in full...)
Any advice to make my first kiss romantic, fun, memorable and special?
Q. Yesterday a guy who s my age, told me that he liked me. I said i liked him too, so it got a bit awkward then he tried to kiss me. Some how I pulled back before he could kiss me, becoz i dont think i was ready to do that since ive never kissed a boy ...
A. 9 July 2012: Cinammon flavored lip gloss. Be sure you brush your teeth and chew some cinammon gum. For some reason that flavor turns most men on. Wear a light perfume, just a hint of something sexy. Make it your signature scent and he will always think of your ... (read in full...)
Do men over 40 really not want to have sex?
Q. I am very concerned about the amount of sex or lack of with my boyfriend of 1.5 appx. he recently moved back home his mom is sick, but I am her caretaker..we dont live together and he didnt really want to move back home he likes his privacy. we ...
A. 9 July 2012: They say that women peak after 30 and men begin to decline sexually after 35 so yes I think it is more challenging for men over 40 to have a ramped up sex drive. Some men probably do but alot don't. Couple that with the pressure your man is having ... (read in full...)
Am I unreasonable that I don't want my son to lie in bed all day?
Q. At 2pm today I told my husband that he should go and tell my son that it was time to get up out of bed and he said "To Do What?" Am I unreasonable not to want him to lie in be all day? ...
A. 9 July 2012: That depends. Does he work the nightshift? If so he probably needs his rest. On the other hand if he spent the evening partying down with his buds, it's probably time you ask him to get a job and move into his own pad so he can do as he pleases and ... (read in full...)
Why does everyone think that its a great thing that my ex got married?
Q. Why is everyone acting like my ex's recent marriage is such a great thing to have happened? First off, my ex is a full-fledged alcoholic who's main goal in life other that working is to drink and party. He also, smokes pot. He left me 2 yrs. ago ...
A. 9 July 2012: You are not wrong n feeling the way you do. I cannot speak for your friends, since it appears they've taken his side. No matter you can always get new friends and probably should. As for the outcome of their marriage, she will probably die of a GI ... (read in full...)
My girlfriend said I can sleep with prostitutes if I wear a condom
Q. I have the most loveliest girlfriend in the world. She is so sweet and adores me. I love her so much and I can't imagine not being without her. Then 2 days ago she said to me she allows me to have sex with prostitutes if I wear a condom. She sai...
A. 4 July 2012: Is she from a foreign country? If so this may be how she was raised, to give a man whatever he wants if you expect to keep him. Maybe she thinks this is what all American men want. You have to talk to her and tell her how you felt about the ... (read in full...)
Do men enjoy passionate kisses after marriage?
Q. I've been married for 10 years and when we were dating my husband would kiss me passionately and frequently. Then after the wedding I have spent the last 10 years letting him know it is a part of foreplay that gets me into the mood and that I need ...
A. 4 July 2012: In most marriages the passionate kissing sort of goes away. I think it's because kissing is part of the initial intimacy couple cling to when they are still getting to know each other, maybe even before they have sex. Once the relationship advances ... (read in full...)
My husband is Ok about it. What are other's thoughts on platonic friendships with overseas penpals? Just friends. But could it cause problems?
Q. I am a married woman who has an email penpal who is also married. My husband is aware of my penpal and has no issue with it so long as it remains just a frienship, which it has and will. We talk about everyday stuff and get on well. My only co...
A. 3 July 2012: Yes you should probably stop writing to him. He obviously told you about his wife for a reason. You have to be the strong one here. Plus the longer you correspond with another man, the further it can go emotionally. Which would be unfair to your ... (read in full...)
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