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... Send *onungalungb a private message | | | *onungalungb's profile:I'm currently single, with an 8 year old son. I've lived a fairly interesting life and have a fair amount of experience in relationships to offer advice to anyone that cares to listen.
My advice falls into four categories:
Good
Not So Good
Funny
Serious
I try to keep most of my responses on the lighter side, unless the situation calls for a more serious tone.
Don't get pissed off and email me if you don't like what I have to say. I'm just having fun. |
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I am a teen virgin-my bf wants to have sex. Should I shave down there?
Q. hi i am a teenager and i am a virgin. my b-f wants to start having sex...I need to know is it better to shave down below or not?? ...
A. 4 October 2006: Just because your boyfriend is ready to have sex, doesn't mean you are ready. Your boyfriend will always be ready. I think you should worry about what you're going to do for birth control, or better yet, why not wait until you're a little older ... (read in full...)
Husband doesn't appreciate me so should I leave him for my 20 year old guy friend?
Q. hi, Long story coming up! I am 34 with 3 children. Have been with the same guy for 20 years and married for 15 of those. He is in the army and we haven't really been together for the past few years. He dislikes the weight I have put on and...
A. 2 October 2006: Life's too short to be miserable. Tell your husband that you're fed up and that you want out. You don't have to bring up the 20 year old. . . and I wouldn't put all of my eggs in that basket either. Live for yourself and your children for a while . ... (read in full...)
Not long had a baby now I'm pregnant again, what do I do??
Q. I'm 19 years old and I just had a baby at the end of June. So she's three months. I went to the doctor the other day and found out I am 4 weeks pregnant! I am just totally nervous. I mean there is NO way that I will give it up or have an abortion ...
A. 2 October 2006: You have the baby, that's what you do.
Don't they teach sex ed anymore? If you're having sex without protection against pregancy, there's a good chance that you'll get pregnant. Duh. I don't mean to be harsh, but you need to wise up. . . or keep... (read in full...)
Whats wrong with her!? and Am I wasting my time ?
Q. After going through so much trouble about her cybersexing younger guys (she`s almost 42),i walk in unexpectidly and shes on a dating site.The search was seeking males 18-35.For 3 years,i`ve been accused,and been the backlash of insecurities.Her ...
A. 2 October 2006: What's wrong with her? She's going through a middle-age crisis. . . or she's just a psychopath. Either way, you've got your hands full. A friend of mine just got out of a relationship with what sounds like the same person. LOL. She was always ... (read in full...)
How long should a male last in sex? Any tips on lasting longer?
Q. How long should a male last in sex? also what techniques could you apply to last longer...
A. 2 October 2006: If you think about something other than what you're doing when you feel like you're about ready to come, that sometimes works. Like, think about your 80 year-old grandmother. That will put the breaks on many a pre-mature blast off.
If you want to k... (read in full...)
My husband is neglecting our marriage and family - when should I give up?
Q. Hello all- Searching for input. Husband of 10 years has become increasingly distant from myself and children. I am one of those "married single parents". He has always had his own thing going on. Recently took a demanding job with a long commute....
A. 29 September 2006: You'll have to decide when enough is enough.
It sounds to me like he has already thrown in the towel.
A wise man once told me that he never heard of anyone saying on their death bed, "I wish I had spent more time working".
Your husband need... (read in full...)
We pulled-now he wants to date me but I prefer being single. If I pull with him agaim..am I leading him on?
Q. i like this boy, and we are really good friends. last weekend we were at a party and we pulled quite a few times, and because i was his first pull [and him mine] people are saying that he wants to go out with me, but hes too shy to admit it. the ...
A. 28 September 2006: Now, for all of us over 20, what is "pulling"?
I've got a couple of guesses, but I'll keep them to myself. LOL.
... (read in full...)
How do I give good head?
Q. i have given head b4 (blow job) but how do i know im doing it right? any sugestions on how 2 give a BJ....?...
A. 28 September 2006: All I know is the worst blow job I ever got was great. LOL.
From a guy's point of view, I'll say this - keep your teeth out of the action, and everything else will be fine.
Here's a little blow job humor for you.
What's the difference betwe... (read in full...)
My seperated guy hasn't contacted me and I wanna know-what the hell is going on?
Q. Hi I have been going with this fella and i have a question before about him! He is separted from his wife and he has a child and two step children we have been getting on ok or so i think! i haven't heard from him since monday and i don't know...
A. 28 September 2006: For what it's worth, here are my ideas: He may have joined the circus; hopped on an air balloon; joined the French Foreign Legion; or joined a religious cult and he is passing out flowers at the airport as we speak. It's hard to speculate.
Did you ... (read in full...)
Is this mess normal?
Q. is it normal when me and my parnter have sex for is semum to dribbel out of me wen he pulls out of me...
A. 28 September 2006: Someone made the comment, "What goes up must cum down". Confucius said it better: "What goe up must come down. What goes up and down, must cum".
Did you expect it to stay inside you forever? LOL.
... (read in full...)
My ex-boyfriend is having sex with my mom. How do I get closure?
Q. My ex-boyfriend is having sex with my mom.I am having a hard time dealing with this since I have to see them both. I don't want him back, but I don't want my mom to have him either.I am jealous that mom is in a relationship. Recently, I've begun ...
A. 22 September 2006: I think you need to avoid both of them. . . or get them to join you on the Jerry Springer show. LOL.
Good luck.... (read in full...)
If I lose weight, will my penis become larger?
Q. Hello, I am in my early 20s and I am about 6'1" and weight about 310 pounds. When erect, my penis is 5.5 inches long. I know that's a good size, but my question is, if I lose weight, will my penis become larger when erect or be the same size? I know ...
A. 21 September 2006: I just heard a heart-warming story and thought I'd share it here:
An elderly man lay dying in his bed. While suffering
the agonies of impending death, he suddenly smelled
the aroma of his favourite biscuits wafting up the
stairs. He gather... (read in full...)
If I lose weight, will my penis become larger?
Q. Hello, I am in my early 20s and I am about 6'1" and weight about 310 pounds. When erect, my penis is 5.5 inches long. I know that's a good size, but my question is, if I lose weight, will my penis become larger when erect or be the same size? I know ...
A. 21 September 2006: Chances are, if you lose fat, your penis will lose fat too, so it might even look smaller. LOL. What kind of question is that anyway? Who sits around thinking about stuff like that? LOL. That's like asking "If I gain weight will my eyes get b... (read in full...)
Married 26 years, he looks at porn all the while, I think he also cheated, I strayed as I was so unhappy, this is all a mess please help someone!!!
Q. Help anyone. I've been married for 26 yrs now, but I am very unhappy. I was married by the age of 19 and at 20 had my first son. I only knew my husband for a short time, for which I only knew him 6 months and was married within that time. Anywa...
A. 21 September 2006: If you want this "marriage" to work (I put the the word "marriage" in quotes on purpose, because what you have surely doesn't seem like a marriage), you need to go to a marriage counselor. Someone that can look at the two of you and determine what ... (read in full...)
Im so confused, we got on great platonically, she split with her bf I complimented her and she hastily left! Why would she do that ?
Q. Help, i'm confused and embarrassed. Over the last few months at a local evening class, I've been chatting briefly and platonically to a lovely girl whom i have always been attracted to. I was delighted to hear from her buddy that she found me attra...
A. 21 September 2006: I don't think you said anything that was "over the top". I think most people would be flattered by that comment. You may have caught her off guard and she wasn't prepared for a response, so she left. Or, even though she and her boyfriend broke up, ... (read in full...)
My husband told me that he is bisexual and now wants to explore some of his fantasies together
Q. I’ve been searching the web for advice about having a kinky partner, and happened upon several requests for advice for partners that are chatting. Well, I have no advice, just a similar story – and now a request for advice. My husband and I ha...
A. 21 September 2006: As Andrew "Dice" Clay once commented on bisexual men - "One minute you're going down on your girlfriend, and the next thing you know, it's balls across the chin.
I don't get it and probably never will. If you don't get it, I doubt if you ever will... (read in full...)
How can I help my bf deal with his problems?
Q. My bf believes in keeping his problems to himself, but I know he's really unhappy because he keeps drinking and smoking more heavily and he's acting different. How can I help him? He has no job and he's annoyed because I've started college so our ...
A. 20 September 2006: I don't know if you can help your boyfriend or not. I do know that he needs to get his life turned around. Smoking and drinking all day. No job. Not exactly what most people would consider "a catch".
If he's not working, where does he get his mone... (read in full...)
I have cheated before, we are engaged together 3 years, but think im falling for someone at work!!
Q. I have been going out with my current boyfriend for nearly three years and we are now engaged, I am only 18 and I have cheated before but totally regretted it. I have been working in my current job for just over and now I think I am starting to fall ...
A. 20 September 2006: I think 18 is too young to be committing yourself to a relationship, especially since you admit to having cheated and feel urges to possibly cheat again.
If you're in a committed relationship, both parties are entitled to respect from one anot... (read in full...)
He's my boss, he's married and i love him
Q. i am 23 years old girl in love with my boss. He is married and has 2 kids. He's ready to leave his family for me. We are so much in love that we want to be together as soon as possible. We kissed each other passionately and that resulted in sex. Now ...
A. 19 September 2006: I'm not sure what I'm more amazed at, your question or anonymous female's response.
First of all, there is the question of the ethics of your boss. Obviously, he never heard the expression "don't f*ck the help". He compounds that indiscretion by b... (read in full...)
Will this happen every time we have sex ??
Q. I had sex for the first time a month ago. It was good except for the fact i bled alot and was considerable painful and my boyfriend noticed! He is a considerably large guy in that department, some 8 inches and extremely wide. We haven't slept ...
A. 18 September 2006: I think what you experienced was the busting of your hyman. Now that that is out of the way, it shouldn't hurt the next time. Lubrication (k-y jelly or something along that line) should help if it's too tight. Take it slow.
I've got 3 inches . . . ... (read in full...)
Im really anxious about my bf going away for a month, what can I do to stop stressing!
Q. My boyfirend is going away for a month and I know im really gonna miss him. I do have a life hobbies and friends but miss him loads. I can suffer from anxeity attacks and dont want to come accross needy to him I dont want to push him away We text...
A. 18 September 2006: I'm not certain that there is abandonment issues, or if you have low self esteem for whatever reason. In any event, talking to a therapist might help. I suffered from anxiety upon the death of my father and hypnotherapy worked for me. You may ... (read in full...)
Always a reason why we cant have sex and its driving me insane!!
Q. I need some advice, as I'm very frustrated! I have a high sex drive and I feel like me and my boyfriend hardly ever get to have sex, as there's always a reason we can't. He has genital herpes and coldsores on his face too. If it's not one, it's the ...
A. 18 September 2006: I'm not a doctor, but you need to be aware of the fact that genital herpes is contagious and, once contracted, will stay with you for the rest of your life. You both should see a doctor and discuss the issue with him/her. If you need sex a lot, this ... (read in full...)
How can I tell him I want to be friends with him, without sounding desperate ?
Q. In pevious questions, I said that I wanted ideas on regaining someones trust, well it seems that the person I was texting was not the person in question. Anyway my dilemma is that the guy in question I have actually spoken to him and said to him ...
A. 18 September 2006: I think I responded to your previous question . . . correct me if I'm wrong. I think I mentioned something about communication.
Now, you tell us that you like him, but are afraid to tell him that you want to be friends. What is he saying? I thin... (read in full...)
How do I get the guy I like to trust me again?
Q. I wrote a letter to this guy i like and enclosed my number (it's a phone i rarely use, so i wasn't bothered about giving the number out.). Anyway I received a call about a week later, and i am pretty sure it was from this guy, the thing is initially ...
A. 18 September 2006: What's in a name? A rose by any other name would smell as sweet.
It sounds like you are playing games. Why all of the deception?
Just explain it the way you explained it here. Who knows, he may just understand. . . but then again. . . .
Good... (read in full...)
My BF of 7 years just left me but it doesn't make any sense!
Q. My boyfriend and I have been in this rollercoaster of a relationship for about 7 years. We have a 5 year old son and I'm pregnant 5 months pregnant. He has struggled for some time with getting stable. During that time he spoke of marriage and ever...
A. 18 September 2006: It sounds like he's a real putz. . . and it sounds like he was using you to support him. You're better off without him. Now that he has a paycheck, nail him for child support and move on.
Good luck!... (read in full...)
If porn is desensitizing to men is the flip side, true? My gf prefers her vibrator to me!
Q. Dear Malyce (agony aunt) and yes it is a nice name I have read some of your objections to men "jerking off to porn". It can be desentisizing, as you say. Tell me if the flip-side is true. Since my partner got herself a wand vibrator and ano...
A. 16 September 2006: My right hand is demeaning to women! LOL. Shame on you hand. I'm going to stop talking to you. Now, my left hand, on the other hand, is quite supportive of women. Go figure.... (read in full...)
He watches porn and I am disgusted!!!!!!
Q. i have been living with my partner for 2yrs and planned marriage, i loved him so much but now he has broke my heart,he said he watched porn once in a blue moon but i discovered otherwise-and what he watches is making me sick,all the girls look ...
A. 14 September 2006: I think you're living with a creepy old fart.
There is a show in the states that shows sting operations where older men are caught trying to hook up with young teenagers. Some of these guys drive hundreds of miles and show up at the door with a si... (read in full...)
How do I mend a broken heart??
Q. Can anyone please give me some tips on mending a broken heart? Has anyone had a relationship where there was mutual love, only for one party to break it off, due to cultural and family pressures? I know my boyfriend (or ex-boyfriend) lo...
A. 14 September 2006: There's no easy remedy for a broken heart. As the Wizard of Oz told the Tin Man, "Hearts will never be practical, until they can be made unbreakable."
Time and distance are the two best cures. Keep your distance and let time heal your wounds.
As... (read in full...)
My boyfriend is pressuring me into getting his name tattooed on me!
Q. my boyfriend of 4 years is pressurising me a lot to get his name tattooed on my breasts or butts. he insists that this is a definite way of expressing my love for him. i am not sure of social and/or clinical affects of this. i love him deeply ...
A. 13 September 2006: I knew a woman once who was a big fan of the movie "Butch Cassidy & the Sundance Kid". So much, in fact, she had the images of Paul Newman and Robert Redford tattooed on either side of the inside of her thighs.
The night after she had the tatt... (read in full...)
I wasnt interested, now I am hes found someone else, what can I do ?
Q. i met this wonderful boy about 2 weeks back.. at first i didnt know what to do, but he was quick wit, fun and charming. i really liked him and coz i was mending a brokenheart i didnt want to go out with him despite him asking me out almost ...
A. 13 September 2006: You had your chance and you blew it. Now, sit back and relax and stay out of the picture. ... (read in full...)
Im 20 shes 14, is it legal to touch her up and kiss her ?
Q. hiya i am 20 year old n me girl is 14 i was just wondering if legal to kiss me girl n touch her up im from the uk n need help to answer these questions i know im not allowed sexual intercourse but wondering if allowed any physical touching or ...
A. 12 September 2006: This is the 2nd question concerning a 14 year-old girl and a 20+ year-old guy in two days. I wonder if they are one and the same?
If you "touched up" my daughter, you wouldn't be "touching up" anyone for a while. My advice, "touch up" someone your... (read in full...)
Why won't he just go away???
Q. what can i do? my ex keeps finding ways to get in touch with me and when he does he makes me feel worthless, that he didn't fancy me for a long time when we were together which is why he went back with other girls, this makes me feel so low ...
A. 12 September 2006: I think a restraining order may be what you need.
The fear of incarceration might be all it takes to put an end his escapades.
Good luck!... (read in full...)
Why are guys afraid to date virgins???
Q. Why are guys afraid to date virgins? What's your view on this?...
A. 12 September 2006: I never met a virgin yet I didn't love . . . LOL.
That's figuratively speaking. LOL.
Some guys like girls they know they can score with. If they know you're an iceberg, they tend to shy away. . . and wait for the big thaw. LOL. ... (read in full...)
She takes prozac but I don't want to give up on her...
Q. does anybody have any experience of having a girlfreind who has/is taking prozac. how does this effect the relationship. The reason i am asking is that there is this young lady who i have been trying to get her to be my girlfreind at various times ...
A. 12 September 2006: Don't go into the relationship thinking you can "help her". That's why she has a doctor.
She may suffer from anxiety, depression, or one of a variety of mental issues. The medication may be needed for her to feel "normal", or it may be only used... (read in full...)
Would it be silly to leave my husband over his use of porn ?
Q. Is it silly to leave my husband over porn? I feel a bit foolish but cant accept the fact he enjoys looking at other womens bodies. I feel like I am a beautiful woman so why should he want to see any other female naked. It hurts my pride and I th...
A. 12 September 2006: I think it is silly of a so-called feminist to write to an advice forum asking for advice about whether she should leave her husband over porn or not.
My answer: Yes, you are silly. Next question. . . .
... (read in full...)
Is he flirting with me, and if so how can I tell him I like him too ?
Q. Dear Cupid, Im confused about a certain man in my life.I need to know whether Im not confused about the messages he's sending out. He's always staring into my eyes for quite a while without looking away. He shows me sex jokes on his phone. He ...
A. 12 September 2006: With all of the staring and gazing going on does he ever take the time to actually talk to you. LOL.
If you're interested in him, the next time he tells you that you should go "some place where it's nice", ask him what he has in mind. If he says... (read in full...)
His ex wont allow their children anywhere near me, this is heartbreaking for me and my partner!
Q. I have been in a relationship for over 12 months and my boyfriends ex will not let me have anything to do with his two children. I understand that she feels we may have moved too quickly as they had only been separated for no more than 7 months but ...
A. 12 September 2006: You say you've tried every avenue but a legal one. Well, I suggest you try the legal one. I don't know the law in BG but I would think that separation papers (I assume they are legally separated) stipulate the parents rights. One parent doesn't ... (read in full...)
Desperate to get my wife to care about me, and to put us first, I am so miserable and not the man I was!!!
Q. Hi, I just need help because I feel so let down in this marriage which has become all about my wife and her needs and her requests, etc. I came here before for advice and it has been very helpful. This is just a very brief idea of what is going ...
A. 12 September 2006: Why are you scared of separation? You sound like you've been emasculated. You've allowed her to turn you into a doormat. She didn't make you that way, you allowed it to happen. You have at least three options:
1 - You can put your foot down and ... (read in full...)
I really love him but cant tell him im a virgin!! Im size 8 would this be why any form of penetration hurts ?
Q. My bf and i live together he's 27 and has a daughter aged 8 who doesnt live with us, Im older than him and i have the ordeal of still being a virgin. We love each other very much, however ive not told him im still a virgin, hes slept with 27 girls ...
A. 12 September 2006: I'm no doctor (but I play one on TV - LOL), but I would think that if you would lose your virginity, there would be no more problem. Now, how you lose your virginity (or bust your hymen) is up to you. I would think a vibrator might do the trick, or ... (read in full...)
How can I make me boyfriend appreciate me?
Q. Heya I just want advice on how I can get my boyfriend running after me like that hes lucky to have me and that he can't treat me like sh*t and think i will still love him. What things can i do? thanks...
A. 12 September 2006: Ignore him. . . or better yet, treat him like sh*t. If that doesn't get him to come around, thank your lucky stars. You don't need someone to treat you like sh*t. Find someone that treats you with respect and lose this loser. ... (read in full...)
I ended it because the sex was boring but I still miss him!
Q. I finished with my lover because i was bored with the sex. It lasted 2 mins with him not doing any foreplay, even though i told him. His answer was that he found that part of sex not very interesting and prefered the intercourse instead. I did tell ...
A. 12 September 2006: I guess because 2 minutes is better than no minutes. LOL.
Surely you can find someone who can show a little more interest than that. If he wasn't interested in pleasing you, he wasn't interested in you. . . only in pleasing himself. Forget him.... (read in full...)
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