| Latest articles: Just Two
This question has 3 answers by readers of DearCupid.ORG.
Newest answer was posted
31 March 2011: I recently read something nice that I would like to share.... JUST TWO. Donate blood twice a year. Donate your eyes after death. Thank God twice a day. Write two letters a week. Visit two ailing people a month. Say two words of gratitude-"...
A little humility goes a long way
This question has 7 answers by readers of DearCupid.ORG.
Newest answer was posted
27 March 2011: I’ve been a moderator here on DC for a while and it’s a great forum. It really irritates me though when the OP shows no regard for the aunts who’ve taken time to answer questions. We moderators don’t know you, yet we spend time poring over ever...
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It's now a reunion weekend instead of a romantic getaway, and I'm paying for it!
Q. Dear Cupid!!!! I recently started dating this guy about three months ago,he's currently not working because he's training to be a police officer. I met him right before he went into the Academy and the things that they go through it is excruciati...
A. 12 April 2017: You've known him for three months and it's a little extravagant gifting him a trip just to make him happy. Don't get him used to nice things this early... You barely know the guy. How did he even agree to accept this gift from you?
Look, tell him... (read in full...)
What do women look for in a man for a boyfriend?
Q. What do women really look for in a man for a boyfriend?...
A. 12 April 2017: A decent guy with strong morals, a good education and holding a steady job. He should have the ability and courage to stand by her no matter what, love her unconditionally, respect her and those that she holds close to her. ... (read in full...)
Men, do you stare off have intense eye sex with women if you are not interested in them?
Q. Hello world! I'm writing to you men out there, or women who feel they can provide insight!! About a year ago I was entranced in a cafe by the most beautiful young man I have ever seen. Although that wasn't what entranced me: he was sittin...
A. 11 April 2017: Eye sex? Wow... That's the first I've heard this term! Didn't even know it existed!
Anyway.
I don't know what to make of this post but here's my two cents.
You seem a little full of yourself and a little too dramatic. As N91 said, q... (read in full...)
A women with a boyfriend/kids is texting my boyfriend and he texts back. I'm not happy about this!
Q. I am not sure whether to stay with my boyfriend. We have been together for two months. We had some arguments and i said that i didnt want to see him anymore. I only said that because i was angry that he eas being horrible to me. I told him that i ...
A. 11 April 2017: I don't think she has mental health problems. I think she's unhappy in her own relationship and is looking for a way out and your boyfriend is her passport to what she thinks is a new and better life. He's flirting heavily with her and she's making ... (read in full...)
My car broke down but my boyfriend didn't believe me. Did I do anything wrong?
Q. Hi all, please I need an advice. I'm so confused and don't know what to do anymore. So I've been with my boyfriend for over a year now, we've always argued. I wish he was more affectionate, flirty and playful like me but he's not he's so serious ...
A. 10 April 2017: Yes you're doing something very wrong.
You're putting up with this moron and giving him power to use over you and you're allowing him to degrade you.
What do you do when you know that something's not right? You rectify it. And you do that ... (read in full...)
I want to confront this guy. Should I do this? Or should I just let sleeping dogs lie?
Q. I have been with my wife approaching 14 years now and married for three. Four years ago my wife confessed to me that she had kissed another man that delivers to her work. She said she felt terrible about it immediately after, she quit her job and...
A. 9 April 2017: The way I see it is, this happened before you were married so even though she slipped up while being in a relationship, she never cheated on you after she took her vows with you and that to me is what really counts. She owned up, she realized her ... (read in full...)
Married man gave me his phone number!
Q. I'm a blogger and I'm trying to get an interview with this married guy I'm semi-acquainted with on social media (I'm married too). We follow each other and we have never spoken until a few days ago when I asked him if he would be interested in ...
A. 7 April 2017: Don't give him your number and by that I mean don't text him. There is absolutely nothing that can be conveyed only through text and not via email.
Listen to your heart, if you feel something's wrong then it probably is.
If he's playing har... (read in full...)
I caught my partner in a lie. Now he's verbally abusive and constantly puts me down
Q. My partner is so different since I caught him out with a lie. We aren't young (both in our 40's) and there should be no grey areas within our relationship. He has lied to me several times about minor things, lied to at least 5 times about bigger ...
A. 7 April 2017: Do you have a job? You need to leave this man right now and I don't even know where to start. How is it your self esteem is so low that you're putting up with this man? Even your 8 year old knows better than you! Your feelings of anxiety, depress... (read in full...)
Married man says he's in a loveless marriage and likes me insanely but won't get in touch with me till I contact him
Q. Good day dear aunts and uncles. I met a charming man on a conference I was heading. We exchanged few words and couldn't stop looking at each other. 2 months later I bumped into him on another business venture and we felt the connection. Then we ...
A. 3 April 2017: That's like the cheating married man's anthem! Loveless marriage, in it for the kids, haven't had sex since the youngest was born, wife doesn't care about me... And most guy have a bonus track of how you're always on their mind and they can't stop ... (read in full...)
Why did this older woman have a thing for the guy I'm dating?
Q. Recently I've gotten together with someone my age.(24) I've known him for since he was 14 he lived down the street. We were at a bar andhis friend told me that when he was 17 he was fucking this woman when she was 32 years old. (She was in the same ...
A. 2 April 2017: What makes you think she took advantage of him? If I'm not wrong and correct me if I am, the age of consent in Canada is 16, so technically neither of them did anything wrong. It was consentual sex between two people who knew exactly what they were ... (read in full...)
I am confused! Why didn't my professor call when I left her my number?
Q. I'm in 4th year of Psychology school, and I am 23 years old. There's this older professor (a woman, in fact). She was married a few times (five, to be exact, all to men), there are rumors that she hooks up with students (not sure which sex), and ...
A. 27 March 2017: I'm afraid I'm going to be harsh with you
Your teacher is there to do a job and it's not your business to comment or even inquire about her personal life. What she does outside of the classroom should be of no concern to you. You're 23 years ol... (read in full...)
Phone sex with boyfriend turns out awfully wrong
Q. I don't know where to start but I've been in a relationship with my man for 5 years and he was never very colourful or expressive when we have phone sex. We recently got into a long distant relationship for 3 months since I'm studying. So these ...
A. 26 March 2017: Whoa! This is one twisted character! But you see, that's the thing about fantasies and you never know what's in the darkest corners of a person's mind. Do you remember the episode from Sex and the City where the very "respectable" politician told ... (read in full...)
I'm over his drama! How do I end this relationship for good?
Q. Sorry for this long post in advance. I just left my super obsessive and manipulative boyfriend of two years. Towards the end of our relationship, he started doubting me for talking to a particular old friend of mine. I had no feelings whatsoever for ...
A. 24 March 2017: What I don't understand is, how can he find ways to talk to you? Why haven't you blocked him yet? You say you don't want him in your life but your words don't match your actions. How is it that he can see you online? The very first thing that you ... (read in full...)
Is he interested in me? And how do I get over him if he's not?
Q. This man I have had a crush on for the past six months seems to have been playing hot and cold with me. (Or maybe I am just reading too much into it). He's been flirty one day and then distant the next. He recently hugged and kissed me on the cheek, ...
A. 24 March 2017: If you have to ask then he's not interested.
If a guy likes you then he will do everything he can to show you what he feels for you. The will be no games, no "I've been busy", no "I'm scared that I'm getting too close to you" business. No matte... (read in full...)
His girlfriend is coming between my old friend and me!
Q. I've been best friends with a guy from grade school, and we were so close and I love him like a brother. We don't see each other very much anymore since I went to college, but we always kept in regular contact via text and Facebook. He has a ...
A. 19 March 2017: I understand what you're saying... Till the point where you said that you messaged his girlfriend on Facebook.
You can't make statements on somebody else's behalf, saying that you'll be friends with them irrespective of how their partner feels. I... (read in full...)
Am I justified to break up with him?
Q. I'm going through a mixed phase right now with my bf. Recently, I've been reflecting on our relationship for the past 5 years, and I'm wondering whether I should just move on because I just don't feel happy anymore. We have been dating for 5 yea...
A. 17 March 2017: Completely justified.
Don't make his problems yours. You're not married, you're not even engaged, you don't need all this drama. He's bringing nothing to the relationship for you. There's no romance, no commitment, no happiness, no security... (read in full...)
It was his first time. But straight after we finished he called his best friend to tell him we'd had sex. Made me feel like an object. What should I do?
Q. Hello, I'm a 16 year old girl. When I was 14 I had a relationship with a boy which lasted about 1,5 year. At the time my parents were breaking up and everything was falling apart. I got sexual abused and that boy destroyed me and I felt like de...
A. 16 March 2017: You're too young to be having sex. You've chosen the wrong guy on the past, you've been abused sexually, you are vulnerable, why are you doing this to yourself again? Being with someone for 3-4 months, given your age and circumstances is not the ... (read in full...)
I feel it's okay to say no to babysitting my husband's sister's children!
Q. My husband and I are both 26 and have been married for half a year. His sister is 10 years older and married with a 2 year old and a 4 year old. I'm neutral to kids but my husband absolutely adores them. However neither of us are interested in ...
A. 16 March 2017: How is your relationship with the sister? Im guessing from your post that she requested him and not you personally and he's the one who agreed to it. So there it is. He agreed to babysit so it's his responsibility. You take the Sunday to go out, ... (read in full...)
He won't let go of me!
Q. I've been in an emotionally draining relationship for the past 2 years. I say 'emotionally draining' because whenever we did fight, I always left my ego aside and went back to apologize, sometimes when I wasn't even in the wrong!! Just because I was ...
A. 15 March 2017: What the hell is he threatening you for? So what of he tells your parents? They're YOUR parents, they'll side by you no matter what!
Just tell your parents everything that you've told us and tell them about how he's threatening you. Your parents ... (read in full...)
Boyfriend wants me to indulge in an MMF threesome with his best friend
Q. My boyfriend of a year recently asked me if I would be into a MMF threesome with one of his best friends, although his words were "tag team". He revealed it was one of his fantasy's, and asked me if I would be into it. At the time I said I don't ...
A. 15 March 2017: OP let me tell you something very clearly.
This guy has zero and I mean ZERO respect for you.
Any decent man who loves his partner will never ever pimp her out in this way. His friend is equally terrible and they're both a team. I don't th... (read in full...)
Wedding plans. What can I say to my sister and yet not upset her?
Q. I am getting married in September and have chosen my bridal party. My sister is supposed to be a bridesmaid in my bridal party. We had a falling out after I had asked her and she had said she no longer wanted to be a part of the wedding. The re...
A. 14 March 2017: Your sister is being a total brat and doesn't realize the mess she's getting herself into by being with this guy. There is no way you or anyone from your family can convince her because right now she's in a love haze where the boyfriend can do wrong ... (read in full...)
What should I do about my mom being controlling and restrictive?(I'm 19, won't be 20 till september)
Q. Okay, I have a feeling this is going to be long but I'll just try to explain everything as best I can.Starting from a young age, I'd say about as young as nine, I sometimes felt as though I was a burden to my mom based on the way she'd get mad and ...
A. 13 March 2017: When it comes to mothers, I normally don't want to believe that they can be vicious and wicked unless of course it's an exceptional case. OP being a mother is a huge sacrifice in itself. I'm not sermonizing; I'm just saying, let's try to look at it ... (read in full...)
What do you think about guys who body shame women?
Q. I recently broke up with my boyfriend. He was the type to cancel on a date on me and get angry for small things or worse, make the topics that don't concern him, his own problems. He never wanted to take me out. After breaking up with him...
A. 13 March 2017: You were dating a cruel, arrogant asshole who showed you his true colors once he'd "conquered" you. Well you know what, that's life. You can't lose sleep over this! You'll have your heart broken and this is how you'll learn about the different types ... (read in full...)
Spectre of my wife's past has come back to haunt us
Q. 2-3 weeks before I met my wife she did a professional porn video in which she says she was actually coming from another man's house where she had had sex with him. Along with that she revealed other things that she never told me and that she has ...
A. 13 March 2017: Can you move past it? I don't know honestly. I don't think I could have, if I were in your shoes.
Did you know about this before you got married or after? If it was before, then you knew everything and got into it so you shouldn't let "what pe... (read in full...)
Husband's penis smells like condoms and we never use them!
Q. Yesterday my husband came very late from work, and he had been drinking and his penis smelled like condoms!, Earlier he called me from work and said hey! I want to take you to the mall and didn't say for what reason, he wanted it to be a surprise ...
A. 12 March 2017: OP, you are way too young. You're too young to be married, to have two children and to live a life where you doubt you're husband to the extent that you have to sniff his penis to know whether he's cheating or not. This is not normal and it's not ... (read in full...)
Husband's penis smells like condoms and we never use them!
Q. Yesterday my husband came very late from work, and he had been drinking and his penis smelled like condoms!, Earlier he called me from work and said hey! I want to take you to the mall and didn't say for what reason, he wanted it to be a surprise ...
A. 11 March 2017: I'm at a loss for words. All these years on DC and yet never have I read something like this!
You were smelling your husband's penis? How did you even *think* of doing this? How did this even occur to you? And then you suspect that you smelled ... (read in full...)
I'm finding out things about my boyfriend's past that bother me
Q. I was friends with someone for just over a year, and we have been dating for three weeks. He has treated me well when we met up, but today, I added his sister on Facebook and saw some photos of him holding hands with his ex girlfriend. It was a ...
A. 10 March 2017: I think I see it now and there are two things.
First the fact that she was still married while he pursued her and second that he didn't do that same with you, i.e., he waited till you were broken up to approach you for a relationship. It's mak... (read in full...)
I'm finding out things about my boyfriend's past that bother me
Q. I was friends with someone for just over a year, and we have been dating for three weeks. He has treated me well when we met up, but today, I added his sister on Facebook and saw some photos of him holding hands with his ex girlfriend. It was a ...
A. 10 March 2017: I'm not sure I understand this correctly.
You are upset because your boyfriend was dating someone who was married but separated and because she looks different from what you had imagined her to be. What does this even mean? You thought she was ... (read in full...)
Are single attractive women usually more messed up?
Q. I know I may get flack for this. But it's been my experience that very good looking women who are single in their 30s and beyond are messed up in some way. My theory is that they have to deal with so many guys just looking for sex that they have ...
A. 7 March 2017: Why are you still single?
And why are you so quick to assume that women beyond a certain age are messed up in some way?
Has it ever occurred to you that not all women out there are looking for relationships or are out there to snag men? People... (read in full...)
I don't know whether to tell my boyfriend that I cheated or not
Q. Okay so I went out one night at the start of my relationship and I barely remember anything. I'd gone out with a few friends and end up in a club on my own. I got speaking to a guy and he walked me part way home. He ended up giving me his number but ...
A. 6 March 2017: You didn't cheat but please take this as a lesson to not drink with other men, to not be alone with strangers in the night and to never put yourself in a position where you might be in danger. And stop talking to this guy and giving him ideas about ... (read in full...)
I made a fool out of myself, how can I feel better about this?
Q. Long story short, I've done a series of things that made me look bad in front of my crush. I don't mean things that have to do with being rude, immoral, nasty or unkind, etc. I just haven't had much dating experience and made mistakes that made the ...
A. 6 March 2017: What is it that you did? We're strangers on the internet, no one's going to know who you are. If you tell us, it might be easier to help you out... (read in full...)
What I thought was just a good time has me having feelings for this girl!
Q. I'm away from my wife now for 1 month, she's visiting her parents and she is pregnant, we are in good terms and very happy with our relation, we have this kind of up and downs that can happen to all the couples well one week ago I traveled for 3 da...
A. 4 March 2017: You've inadvertently used the right word in your last sentence to sum up your problem. It's not a crush, it's a *crash*.
I feel bad for your wife. She has no idea what she's in for and no one deserves this pain, least of all at a time like thi... (read in full...)
Does his behavior indicate that he's an emotional abuser? Should I breakup with him?
Q. 1-) In life, we should have certain words filtered, my boyfriend does not seem to have one. I am upset because, he has this tendency of referring to woman as bi***es, ”oh tha b*tch does this or that, in a very despotic way, he does not say this all ...
A. 2 March 2017: Quick question... Why are you still with this guy?... (read in full...)
His family want us to marry, mine don't!
Q. Dear Aunts and Uncles, I 'was' dating this guy for a little over two years. We have both met each other's families and all was well until last December when his family started asking him to get married. Now the problem is I am in my early 20s ...
A. 27 February 2017: Right. There you have it. He primarily needs you for 3 things and you've said it yourself.
1. He thinks it's too late to start over. Translation- I'm too big a loser and I know that never in this lifetime again will I get a girl like you so there... (read in full...)
We are not meeting so often and he is blaming his work!
Q. Hi, Aunts! I've been seeing a guy for 2 months now. We used to talk throughout the day and text and meet often, but of late he initiates contact less. It's very frustrating when "Work has been very hectic" is the reply I receive as an explanatio...
A. 24 February 2017: Questions like this are frequent on DC and unfortunately they have the same answer... He's just not that into you. Sorry OP but that's what it looks like. Just 2 months and this is the state of affairs... I know people who've been married for 35 ... (read in full...)
I hope I'm wrong but wonder based on these signs if should I just move on?
Q. I normally have a really good intuition about relationships and men, but oftentimes ignore it in hopes that I am wrong. I'm sort of hoping that I'm wrong this time around, but I digress. I met with this guy about a month ago. He is older than me...
A. 21 February 2017: Sorry OP but he's not interested in you. Maybe he's trying to be but it's just not coming from within... because it wasn't there in the first place.
If a man likes you then he will go out of his way to be with you, to spend time with you, to ... (read in full...)
How can I talk to them about this? What can I do about my boyfriend and my best friend? He hangs out with her when I'm not present
Q. My best friend and I are very different people and we get on really well, even though I no longer see her very often. We have been friends for years. A year ago I helped her get close to a guy she liked who I liked at the same time. Things did...
A. 19 February 2017: Well yes it would bother me if I were you! Because they are leaving you out conveniently and by what you say, it does sound like they're more of a couple than you and your boyfriend. Would your boyfriend be OK with it if the shoe was on the other ... (read in full...)
Is he trying to convey something by winking at me?
Q. Hello there, My co-worker and I were very good friends at work. We had never gone out together, I felt some subtle hints from him. Then we got into major conflicts, he came by to apologize afterward. After that, I backed off and just be another ...
A. 18 February 2017: Maybe it's just me but I would be very put off by someone who winks at me.
He's probably implying that all is well between both of you as far as he's concerned... And perhaps he's even open to rekindling the friendship. ... (read in full...)
Why is my friend touching me this way?
Q. I have a friend whom I know from 2 months and we became close in a very short while... From few weeks he is touching my sides, hips and breast. What does this mean? ...
A. 18 February 2017: Uncle Wise has said pretty much what I was about to. First of all, you can't possibly be that naive!! You know why he's touching you, of course it's sexual and not just that, it's perverted.
You barely know the guy and you should be very careful ... (read in full...)
Why is my friend touching me this way?
Q. I have a friend whom I know from 2 months and we became close in a very short while... From few weeks he is touching my sides, hips and breast. What does this mean? ...
A. 18 February 2017: Uncle Wise has said pretty much what I was about to. First of all, you can't possibly be that naive!! You know why he's touching you, of course it's sexual and not just that, it's perverted.
You barely know the guy and you should be very careful ... (read in full...)
My boyfriend keeps texting a female co-worker and it's getting inappropriate. Am I overreacting?
Q. So my boyfriend has a female co-worker. He told me a couple weeks ago that it was pretty obvious to him and a few co-workers that a supervisor was trying to get with this female coworker, let's call her "B". My boyfriend told me that he told B "I ...
A. 17 February 2017: So far, from what you say it doesn't really seem inappropriate. The only thing I can tell you here is, don't put ideas into his head. He probably genuinely didn't think of anything like "that" when he was talking her and if you keep hounding him ... (read in full...)
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