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My car broke down but my boyfriend didn't believe me. Did I do anything wrong?

Tagged as: Health, Troubled relationships, Trust issues<< Previous question   Next question >>
Question - (9 April 2017) 7 Answers - (Newest, 21 April 2017)
A female United Kingdom age 30-35, anonymous writes:

Hi all, please I need an advice. I'm so confused and don't know what to do anymore. So I've been with my boyfriend for over a year now, we've always argued. I wish he was more affectionate, flirty and playful like me but he's not he's so serious and can be boring at times. He looks at every girl in public but hardly looks at me and he's not touchy feely with me??. Today is his birthday and I got him presents and birthday card. We were suppose to go his cousins baby's christening at 11am. My car broke down on the way to pick him up. I was very upset cause I knew he'd say I lied about the car. The RAC brought me home and He got a cab for us to go. We got delayed a lot and they had left the church when we got there. My bf started shouting at me in front of the people at the church and the cab driver, he said I lied about my car breaking down, he knows my car is fine I lied cause I wanted to delay it and not go. On the ride there I felt so sick, I told him, he completely ignored me, I gave him his birthday card he told me to keep it, he doesn't want it. I even had the cake with me. I got so embarrassed and upset I told the driver to take me home. He blames me for everything that goes wrong. He texted me "I've made up my mind is done".

I feel like he takes me for granted and doesn't appreciate anything I do. He always asks me about going to the gym or for a run, I know I've put on a few pounds but I'm working on it, I signed up to the gym. He doesn't hold me or touch me but looks at every girl in public. I guess he's not attracted to me. He doesn't smile. He's so serious. Please tell me did I do anything wrong?

View related questions: cousin, flirt, text

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A female reader, aunt honesty Ireland +, writes (21 April 2017):

aunt honesty agony auntI am glad you have decided to leave him alone and look to the future. Well done.

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (13 April 2017):

Thanks everyone. I really appreciate all your kind advice. I texted him back this and haven't heard from him. I'm moving on with my life, he doesn't love me.

Fine with me cause I certainly do not want to be in a relationship with a guy who doesn't love me, respect me, doesn't find me attractive, doesn't know my worth, is undeserving of me, doesn't trust me, is insensitive, uncaring and is unappreciative of me, finds fault in everything that I do and talks down at me like I'm a dog. so serious with no sense of humour.

Nope, I'm done, I know my worth and I deserve to be treated like the princess that I am. Bye??

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A female reader, aunt honesty Ireland +, writes (11 April 2017):

aunt honesty agony auntYou have not had a great relationship from the start. He doesn't seem to trust you and thinks you will go out off your way to upset him. Listen to him when he says he is done and don't contact him again. Nobody should be allowed to shout at you and humiliate you just because your car broke down. He is not worth your time or effort.

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A male reader, anonymous, writes (11 April 2017):

Even a scan read of your question clearly shows he's not a nice guy. Your message reads like you live in fear of disappointing him.

Do what's right for you- talk with him about it, see if he's willing to make a bit of effort or move on.

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A female reader, Anonymous 123 Italy +, writes (10 April 2017):

Anonymous 123 agony auntYes you're doing something very wrong.

You're putting up with this moron and giving him power to use over you and you're allowing him to degrade you.

What do you do when you know that something's not right? You rectify it. And you do that by never taking this idiot back again. He's going to come crawling back and make it look like he's doing you a big favour and that is where you kick him out for good.

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A female reader, chigirl Norway +, writes (10 April 2017):

chigirl agony auntThis guy is a dick. Do not take him back, and stop entering relationships with people who are not good to you. You can not hope that a man will change for you. People do not change. Ever.

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A female reader, Honeypie United States + , writes (9 April 2017):

Honeypie agony auntHoney, TAKE his words: "I've made up my mind is done" serious and STOP talking to him. BLOCK his number, remove him from social media etc. and consider yourself SINGLE again.

He sounds like a BAD match for you. You want him to BE more like you but THAT is not who HE is. So maybe NEXT time you meet a guy find someone more your OWN speed with a personality that compliments your own, instead of being completely opposite.

I understand why he was pissy about being late for a christening but SHIT happens. Like a car breaking down. Blaming YOU isn't going to change that.

His behavior kind of shows how inept he is at dealing with complications, the fact that you two argue all the time and neither of you seem HAPPY about being with each other - IT should BE the PUSH you need to accept it's over and let him go.

HE isn't going to be the GUY you want him to be. Nor is he going to start being grateful for what you do for him. Or stop looking at other girls (which I BET he does JUSt to make you upset).

The ONLY thing I see you doing "wrong" is BEING with a guy who JUST isn't a good match for you. And that is an EASY fix!! End it and move on.

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