A
male
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes:I know I may get flack for this. But it's been my experience that very good looking women who are single in their 30s and beyond are messed up in some way. My theory is that they have to deal with so many guys just looking for sex that they have been hurt so much or just treated like physical specimens that they have learned not to trust men. I have found them to be, as a result, somewhat entitled, oversensitive, less compassionate.As someone himself still single in their 30s, I have learned to raise red flags whenever meeting a good-looking woman my age. I wonder: if she is so good-looking, why is she still single? Usually, getting to know them, the answers become obvious.I know people are gonna go off about me now, saying that I am generalizing, all people are different, etc. But I really would be interested to hear what your REAL experiences in meeting very pretty mature women has been.Thanks.
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, aunt honesty  +, writes (15 March 2017):
 Why are you still single? What are you so messed up about then?
A
female
reader, Anonymous 123  +, writes (7 March 2017):
 Why are you still single?
And why are you so quick to assume that women beyond a certain age are messed up in some way?
Has it ever occurred to you that not all women out there are looking for relationships or are out there to snag men? People are many times single by choice and if it raises red flags for you then good. It'll help you keep away from the women who you look upon so suspiciously.
Also, I'd like to add that "messed up" is a very subjective term and is open for interpretation. Who isn't messed up? Who exactly is "normal"? Is a 25 year old girl any less "messed up" than a 33 year old? And if you think she is, then why? You think being in her 20s means she's less entitled, more sensitive and compassionate?
You've probably been rejected by attractive, confident women who're your age and instead of thinking that maybe something's wrong with you, you're arrogant enough to think that something's wrong with the opposite sex.
Also, where exactly do you meet these women who cause you to raise your red flags?
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A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (7 March 2017): Of course good looking women get hit on much more so they have the luxury of being choosy and yes the do have difficulty in choosing the best one from the flock. As a result they are difficult to get, by poor ordinary looking guys like me.
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A
female
reader, Honeypie + ♥, writes (7 March 2017):
 I will agree with Denizen, I don't think you CAN generalize and I think maybe you need to rethink the "pond" in which you have been fishing.
If looks are more important that personality, maybe... you also need to rethink that?
And I don't think it's impossible for a good looking woman to NOT have much baggage and find herself single. You find a lot more women who in their 20's WANTS a career rather than settle down. OR who come to the conclusion that the guy they dated for a LONG time doesn't really what the same things and they end the relationship.
It's a little TOO easy to say - oh she is pretty so she MUST be F'd up! And if that was the case, go for the Plain Jane?
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A
male
reader, Denizen  +, writes (7 March 2017):
 I'm not sure you are asking in the right forum. This is not a site to debate topics. It is a site on which help and advice is offered.
The fact that your breadth of experience has led you to your conclusion could suggest you have had a lot of short-term relationships.
Could the problem lie elsewhere? Might it be the pool in which you are fishing, or the type of woman on which you are focusing?
I humbly suggest a degree of introspection is in order before reformulating your post.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (7 March 2017): The same could be said about men. If he's so good looking and single in his 30's, then why? Just assume he's got some issues and move on.
You'd be pretty gutted if a nice woman didn't give you a chance because she just made that assumption about you. Maybe consider each woman as an individual and look for more than good looks and find out more about her and you'll get to know the real person she is.
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