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| | *oonridge McPhalify's profile:i've done a psychology degree but can see how a lot of the established ways are usefull but open to abuse by agents of social control (doctors/thought police).
i have been diagnosed as manic depressive but at the moment am not in any state that would be classed as serious. i appear to have things balanced by consuming omega three, b vitamins and dairy food, and have insight into irrational thought patterns because for a long time they came to dominate my thinking.
i like to see things from a logical point of view, see myself as quick to analyse and tend to back away from situations to view them objectively.
i love drugs and have for years but have more control over myself now than i ever did in the past. being bipolar i came to rely on mood controlling agents as i had great difficulty with wild mood swings. i am no longer experiencing problems with my mood and as such my drug use has calmed down (or matured).
i am single but am making an effort and hopefully something good will come along. i'm very picky though and dont want to be in a relationship for the sake of it
i am gay and while this is an issue (as it would be to anyone in a society where it is tolerated rather than accepted), i dont consider it to be a defining feature of myself. i prefer to associate with people because i find them interesting rather than because of labels.
i love agony aunt columns and friends say i give good advice (though they would wouldn't they). either way this is a hobby and a fun one at that. it also satiates my nosiness without having to impose it on people that could cause me to be known as nosy/interfering.
i am actively making an effort to find love but am wary of people. the risk has to be worth it as love tends to send me (literally) crazy. |
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I have an issue with cum!
Q. I honestly do not like cum. If i look at it, taste, feel or even think about it too much, i gag and feel like i'm going to vomit. I've always pushed past this feeling of nausea, and just dealt with it, i've pretended that it didn't bother me. But it ...
A. 30 November 2010: maybe you have associated cum in your head with bad STD's and now you see it in a similar vein to boogies/faeces/vomit as a disease spreader.
because naturally a reaction of disgust appears to things we know to be carriers of disease.
maybe t... (read in full...)
I feel doomed to a very lonely sex life at 36!
Q. I have the most thoughtful and loving partner i've ever had (Except in the bedroom). We've been together 2 years now and it's gotten worse. He's 34 and does a very physical job for a living, has a long drive there and back and does get up very ...
A. 30 November 2010: you have to explain the problem sensitively and if it means that much to you and he shows over time no real change then you may have to move on. this is a tough one, but also a vital aspect of relationships in the early stages (2 years isn't that ... (read in full...)
I just want to know if I’m a fool or should I just move on.
Q. So basically I’ve been seeing this guy for almost a month now, he's 22 and I’m 18. Were on the same course in uni but in different years, I’m in my first he’s in his last: S We met when we were drunk and swapped numbers, he’s such a lovely gu...
A. 29 November 2010: he is all over the place, plus when he finishes uni is he going to stay there to be with you? you have 2-3 years left there, he has 1 at the most. think about it.
also i wouldn't trust him based on what you have described about him chatting... (read in full...)
I couldn't wait for him to come out of the closet!
Q. So I'm gay and there's this guy that I like. He is actually my house mate, and things are kind of weird. over the past 2 months, I thought that he had been hinting to me that he was gay, or at least unsure of his sexuality. I have never really ...
A. 11 November 2010: here is my view- he needed someone to talk to, he said he wasn't ready for a relationship(but was probably hinting at experimental sex) and you responded to that logically by tell him you couldn't wait for him to make up his mind.
he has interpre... (read in full...)
Gay Intervention for a "straight" friend
Q. Okay so this is a strange situation I'm gonna explain to you guys and I'm not too sure myself on the right path to take with it but you guys have given me great feedback before so I'd like to know your opinions on what I should do next... Firs...
A. 11 November 2010: ahh from that it sounds like he is interested in you, but you're not that into him and getting him to come out could get him off your back? concern for people is good but sometimes worrying about other people doesn't really change things or their ... (read in full...)
Gay Intervention for a "straight" friend
Q. Okay so this is a strange situation I'm gonna explain to you guys and I'm not too sure myself on the right path to take with it but you guys have given me great feedback before so I'd like to know your opinions on what I should do next... Firs...
A. 10 November 2010: why do you care? you said in your last year he had become a user and on this instance he used you for sex. there you go
i doubt he is gay as its hard to have girlfriend after girlfriend and have sex with them if you are not attracted to them. pe... (read in full...)
How can I overcome these mixed feelings for my friend?
Q. Hey people! I have a problem. I asked out my close friend a month or so ago, and was rejected, given the "no chance" treatment. My problem is not with trying to form some sort of relationship (as she said, "no chance of anything happening bet...
A. 6 November 2010: as long as necessary to not care about her any more which is dependent on how long you've had a thing for her. it will take as long as it does, but you will know as at some point you wont care about her anymore (and it will be like a eureka freedom ... (read in full...)
Do all bi couples swallow?
Q. my question is do all bi couples swallow cum or do they spit it out and if you don't swallow it why do you have oral sex to begin with just to get it hard. shame what a wonderful taste...
A. 6 November 2010: some people dont like spunk, some people do.
... (read in full...)
How can I overcome these mixed feelings for my friend?
Q. Hey people! I have a problem. I asked out my close friend a month or so ago, and was rejected, given the "no chance" treatment. My problem is not with trying to form some sort of relationship (as she said, "no chance of anything happening bet...
A. 6 November 2010: cut contact with her for a while, simple. i was very good friends with this guy and there was "no chance" but something kept making me think there was and there is ussually some behaviour the other person does that sends you a mixed signal. remove ... (read in full...)
I think having a boyfriend might solve my problems
Q. I have a major issue. I'm a 16 year old guy and my problem revolves around my sexuality. For years I've tried to deny that I am gay/bi, I've tried to act straight, be straight and still do today. But, the difference now is that I've actually ...
A. 6 November 2010: essentially you dont trust anyone and that comes from hiding something important from others 24/7.
would it be that bad if your friends found out you were gay? i came out at school although a little older than you at 17, and although there wa... (read in full...)
He only wants sex, but I want to be friends!
Q. Dear all I am a 26 bi male and I haven’t been in any relation with a guy for many reasons. Anyway, lately I met a 33 years old guy online. We didn’t talked too much and he asked me to get naked on cam (I felt strange from his question but I did it a...
A. 6 November 2010: it sounds like he does want sex because he doesn't KNOW you he just knows what you LOOK like...... (read in full...)
Should I Move On?
Q. i'm in love with this guy i've know since i was 15, we started dating in September and after a month, he broke up with me because he still had some feelings for his ex who he left 2 months before our relationship because his ex was sleeping with a ...
A. 5 November 2010: he doesn't know what he wants which means you will be messed about by him, you KNOW what YOU want so leave him alone and maybe someone who WILL treat you properly will come along
good luck... (read in full...)
I just want to be with him! Is there any advice?
Q. Hi there, Theres this guy I've been working with. He said to me that he really likes me but because he has a boyfriend and we work together, nothing will happen between us and we would just be friends. I absalutley love this guy. Everyt...
A. 5 November 2010: he sounds like someone that is giving very mixed signals, people often say they are breaking up with their significant other to arouse sexual interest from another party. however it doesn't always lead to a relationship with the other party, it can ... (read in full...)
Its sad that I didn't realize what I had until I lost it
Q. Hi everyone I am looking for someone to help me out. I am a gay man and I was in a relationship. The guy I was with was a good guy and he did so much for me. We broke up as I was going thru a tough time. I did him wrong in so many ways. I know I ...
A. 4 November 2010: your drug habit shut him out and he left. you can blame yourself all you want but it wont put things back to the way they were. he has probably had enough of the way you behaved. your only option is to focus on making yourself more well rounded and ... (read in full...)
My boyfriend never comes near my penis!
Q. Hi everyone. I've posted a few questions on here before. I'm still struggling with my relationship. To give you a bit of background, I'm a 23-year-old gay guy who has been in a relationship with a 53-year-old guy (huge age gap, I know!) for ...
A. 4 November 2010: he is selfish, move on
he is clearly not attracted to you. not a good person to have around as he will shred your self esteem. leave him now... (read in full...)
I know I am not gay and would never even kiss a guy, but why do I get turned on by gay porn?
Q. i'm straight and in a relationship, i've been with many girls, i'm really attracted to them and lesbians, i often find im turned on by girls i shouldnt been like my ex's sisters and stuff. anyway my question is, i like to watch gay porn and get ...
A. 4 November 2010: getting erect is something that happens to me when i see females in porn and i'm gay. but feeling funny inside rarely ever happens, if you get a kind of crazy excitement in your guts then for me there is some element of craving man sex. its the ... (read in full...)
For the girls: Would you dump your boyfriend if you found out he was a 25 year old virgin?
Q. This question mainly applies to women but I was wondering if you would dump your boyfriend if he told you one day that he was a virgin and that he was over the age of 25 (I'm 23 but considering the worst case scenario for me). I could have lost it ...
A. 3 November 2010: i'm gay but i would enjoy devouring his innocence like a wild beast. surely this has got to be a turn on ladies?
how often do girls get an opportunity to teach and mold someones skills from the get go?... (read in full...)
For the girls: Would you dump your boyfriend if you found out he was a 25 year old virgin?
Q. This question mainly applies to women but I was wondering if you would dump your boyfriend if he told you one day that he was a virgin and that he was over the age of 25 (I'm 23 but considering the worst case scenario for me). I could have lost it ...
A. 3 November 2010: i'm gay but i would enjoy devopuring his innocence like a wild beast. surely this has got to be a turn on ladies?
how often do girls get an opportunity to teach and mold someones skills from the get go?... (read in full...)
How can I speak to my dad about writing a will?
Q. My Dad is 75 and has not made a will. How can I speak to him about this? He goes all weazilly when I mention it, but I feel really sad. I know that if he dies without one not only will his kids be left broken hearted but we will have a hell of a ...
A. 3 November 2010: talk to your mum and get her to persuade him to not throw his money down the drain. she probably wont make him as distant and will have more sway. get her to ask him why if his money is going to her can he not put it in writing. i'm sorry to say ... (read in full...)
Is he gay or just really nice?
Q. So i've just recently met this guy whos friends with one of my friends. At first i just thought "cute", but then i talked to him and now i can't stop thinking about him. When he left i turned to one of my friends and was instantly saying "Wow, he...
A. 1 November 2010: please just ask him directly, if you dont you will never know. most of what you wrote was confusing and the only way to clarify is not through speculation but through direct action- ask him!... (read in full...)
I don't know if I should dump my needy boyfriend
Q. well im dating this guy he is a very nice guy but he calls 24 seven. he never leaves me alone. i need time for my self and he wants me to be around him and i have things to do he would yell at me some times for saying i couldnt come over or talk he ...
A. 31 October 2010: maybe he knows about this new man on the horizon. anyway if he shouts at you because you are not at his beck and call that is childish and i personally would find it hard to tolerate. if someone shouted at me beacuse i was busy doing other things i ... (read in full...)
Could he be gay/bi? And what do I do now?
Q. I am 16 and a sophmore in highschool. I am a bi guy. Nobody knows that I am bi. I have a huge crush on this guy. He doesnt know im bi, and I'm not sure if he is gay or bi. He takes every chance he has to hug me, and he said that I was cute. In our ...
A. 31 October 2010: look as things are flowing dont put pressure on them, let it flow naturally, good luck x... (read in full...)
Bad burning pain in vaginal area after sex. What can it be?
Q. hey everyone, so heres my question. everytime me and my bf have sex i get really bad pains around the entrance of my vagina in a ring shape. It stings really bad and is like a burning pain. it gets so bad that we have to stop having sex becau...
A. 28 October 2010: go to the doctor, gets some tests done. it could be many different things...... (read in full...)
Is he gay or straight?
Q. hello Hi i'm bisexual ok and I have a friend who claimed not bisexual but he said he's cool to snuggle cuddle with me like really close no space at all, which is weird. do you think any straight man on earth would allowed this? well i still dont ...
A. 28 October 2010: its definitely leading you on, wether he needs a hug or not that kind of behaviour will turn you on so dont let it happen again. i had a friend like this and i fell in love with him and now i dont see him cos it broke my heart and i think more of ... (read in full...)
Could he be gay/bi? And what do I do now?
Q. I am 16 and a sophmore in highschool. I am a bi guy. Nobody knows that I am bi. I have a huge crush on this guy. He doesnt know im bi, and I'm not sure if he is gay or bi. He takes every chance he has to hug me, and he said that I was cute. In our ...
A. 28 October 2010: i think he is definitely gay, but if he was serious about toilet sex then he sounds promiscuous.
just ask him why he isn't being friendly anymore (he might be feeling rejected that you didn't agree to swordfight-childsih). anyway ask him what his... (read in full...)
My girlfriend tried to cheat on me in the past and now its hard for me to trust her.
Q. My girlfriend is on a space break with me for a week. It happened because i dont trust her with other guys and i am always scared that she will cheat on me or dump me for someone else. She flirted with my best friend and he asked her out to take her ...
A. 28 October 2010: being chatted up by your friend is not the same as her trying to cheat. unless there is something you are not telling us?
what happened is your "friend" tried to steal your girlfriend.
if i was going out with someone and they told me who i co... (read in full...)
I'm gay, he's 'straight'? I'm absolutely in love with him and don't know what to do...
Q. Wow, Ok. I'm 22 and openly gay, and so I have this friend. We met a couple months ago at a party and I immediately had an attraction towards him. He's adorable, funny, sweet, kind and "straight" supposedly. Everyone thinks he is gay or ...
A. 27 October 2010: some men will give out signals everyone that show others what they want to see. i had a friend like this and people thought there was something going on but really he was just feeding his massive ego off my attraction to him. been there done that, ... (read in full...)
My girlfriend asked who I was attracted to when I first started school, I told her the truth and now she wants a break!
Q. Hi everyone. Thanks for checking my post So here's the situation. Yesterday, I had a VERY rough day. I was talking to my girlfriend, when all of a sudden she asks me this question. "Who do you find attractive when you first entered school?"...
A. 27 October 2010: anyways tell her you didn't mean it and that she is being unreasonable and insecure and that you were tricked into answering a question that has no bearing on your current relationship.
to be honest if this is the kind of insecure crap she pull... (read in full...)
My girlfriend asked who I was attracted to when I first started school, I told her the truth and now she wants a break!
Q. Hi everyone. Thanks for checking my post So here's the situation. Yesterday, I had a VERY rough day. I was talking to my girlfriend, when all of a sudden she asks me this question. "Who do you find attractive when you first entered school?"...
A. 27 October 2010: she's very immature and maybe you should have avoided answering that sort of question.
questions to not answer from women
am i androgynous?
how old do you think i am?, no really go on guess!
what other girls do you fancy (when in a re... (read in full...)
There is no room at the Inn for our best friend!
Q. I have 2 best friends, named Ashley and Mary. Ashley has a job and is going to school, and Mary doesn't have a job and is doing an internship and not getting paid for it, and I have a job and I'm going to school. We have all been talking about mo...
A. 27 October 2010: sounds like you're not that close to her at all. lets be honest. when is this internship going to turn into a job that makes money? how is she even paying for the place you currently live with no money?
either way just look for a two bedroom ... (read in full...)
I need to get rid of this young girl before my wife finds out!
Q. I need help getting rid of a girl of a young girl in my life... This is causing me much stress and I don't know what to do.. Here is a little background... I'm in my mid 40s, been married for 20 years and have two teenage daughters. My w...
A. 27 October 2010: this girl is trading sex for money and she is simply that- a prostitute, who is financially crippling you and destroying your marriage. i suggest cut all contact with her and get some self control or go on like you are now and watch your money and ... (read in full...)
I am afraid a guy I met online will tell all and the life I have built will crumble
Q. Hey everyone heres my problem . i started at a different college for the second time . quite quicky i was put on the rugby team . for many years i had / still am unsure about who i am - seeing as so many people have played cruel mind games...
A. 23 October 2010: tell him to tell anyone that he wants and if he tells people things say that you dont have any interest in him sexually and that is why he is spreading rumours (which in essence means he is humiliating himself in public via a sustained failed ... (read in full...)
I have a 30% chance of living so he dumped me for his ex
Q. I fell for this man, he was everything to me. I was diagnosed with cancer, which is spreading to my lungs...I have a 30% chance of getting through it...but when I saw messages on Kellen* phone (I was using it because mine was broken) I noticed ...
A. 23 October 2010: whatever his mindset and motivation he has treated you badly when you needed him most. dumping someone because they might not live shows a huge a lack of respect or caring for them. sounds like a selfish player to be honest.
i feel sorry for your... (read in full...)
How do I get my wife to show me affection again!
Q. I just returned from a deployment from iraq. my wife had an affair with another woman. I have forgiven her for the infidelity but now she will not have sex with me. The other woman is now trying to get my wife to leave me by laying these games. ...
A. 23 October 2010: sounds like your wife is a lesbian. have you asked her this, as if its the case then there may not be much you can do.
the reality is that if she is staying with you for financial security while not being attracted to you then it is unfair o... (read in full...)
Husband is a big time drinker! Do I stay?
Q. My question to you is that I been with my husband for 16 years we have 3 beautiful girls together, my husband is a big time drinker and Iam not talking just about beer its hard liquor Its where my oldest daughter he hits her,and verbally abusive me ...
A. 22 October 2010: the violence and total absense of love here is the issue, his alcohol consumption doesn't justify hitting your kids. leave him cos he makes you feel terrible and is violent.
if he is hitting your kids it is your duty as a parent to stop this...... (read in full...)
I love this guy to pieces and don't know what to do!
Q. I've been having so much trouble with this guy I work with. A couple of months ago he said to me (while drunk) that he loved me and wanted a relationship with me. For three weeks after that night he never spoke to me, until I found out he has...
A. 22 October 2010: this guy may tell you he wants a relationship and may not- take him aside and ask him what his intentions are. you seem to think that he has to talk to you. but you can talk to him and say you have a big problem and you need a chat.
take control ... (read in full...)
Do I have a reason to be worried about my boyfriend's past drug use?
Q. I've been with my boyfriend for about a year and eight months. We've lived together for about two. Early on in the relationship, I knew he had had some one-night stands in previous years, between the ages of 18 and 20. He also told me he had smoked ...
A. 21 October 2010: you clearly had respect for these uncles which has since crumbled. just beacuse your idea's fell apart before, doesn't mean your man is going to too. its all about levels of intensity.
drinking once in a while is fine, being drunk all day it not. ... (read in full...)
Do I have a reason to be worried about my boyfriend's past drug use?
Q. I've been with my boyfriend for about a year and eight months. We've lived together for about two. Early on in the relationship, I knew he had had some one-night stands in previous years, between the ages of 18 and 20. He also told me he had smoked ...
A. 21 October 2010: love is about trust and maybe having that trust jeopardised. its a thrill cos its a risk. you are relating negative experiences and lumping them on your boyfriend which is unfair but expected. just chill and if the worst happens move on...... (read in full...)
Do I have a reason to be worried about my boyfriend's past drug use?
Q. I've been with my boyfriend for about a year and eight months. We've lived together for about two. Early on in the relationship, I knew he had had some one-night stands in previous years, between the ages of 18 and 20. He also told me he had smoked ...
A. 21 October 2010: i think you're judgemental attitude could have a very bad effect on your positive relationship. i used a lot of different drugs and weed just isn't that bad when you see what alcohol/amphetamine's/heroin/cocaine, do to people. chill out as you are ... (read in full...)
Is it really right to strike someone in this situation?
Q. I was surprised and a bit shocked by some of the responses to A recent post about a guy wanting to know if women found it attractive when a guys junk happens to show. Several of the women say that they would slap the guy in the face if his junk ...
A. 21 October 2010: basically having you're cock "slip" out is indecent exposure and the only person who will get aroused by that is the one who owns the penis in question. asking women if they like being flashed will always elicit a negative response...
... (read in full...)
Got too close to my fiance's friend, now he's distant, is it because of what could have happened?
Q. I'm getting married in July. However, last year I started falling for one of my fiancés friends, he has loads of friends but me and this one became really close, chatting everyday, having the odd lunch or whatever during the day, until we had a big ...
A. 21 October 2010: look you played them for attention and made your choice, now the hurt that leading people on has caused a rift in the friendships. this is to be expected. dont take it to heart just move on as he has done.
friendships can have sell by dates an... (read in full...)
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