| Latest articles: How I Got Here
This question has 6 answers by readers of DearCupid.ORG.
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23 February 2008: Finally I decided to write a synopsis of how I ended up here some six weeks ago. The following story is true in its entirety. I guess the reason I am writing it is because I would like others to hear my story and how even the most well intentioned ...
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Can anyone tell me what a "spit roast" is???
Q. What's a "spit roast" all these lasses at school where taking the piss out of a girl at school because she didn't know what it meant and I just laughed along so they didn't know any different. What does it actually mean? ...
A. 2 March 2008: This is the FIRST TIME I've ever rated a question a 5! lolololol. After reading all these answers, I just have to ask all of the respondents one thing: Can I have the last 5 minutes of my life back, PLEASE? lololol.... (read in full...)
I don't know what she's doing on her nights out...
Q. I need to bounce this senario of you. What do you think is happening or what I should say or do about it? My girlfriend of 5 months goes out with work friends once or twice a month, problem is I don't know who they are, or where she goes. To make ...
A. 2 March 2008: You should go out with your friends ONCE or TWICE a month. But ask her maybe once if you can meet her friends. If she says yes, then I wouldnt worry too much it about unless she's giving other reasons to worry. If she says no, Then don't worry at ... (read in full...)
Once in a while I come home late after drinking which leads my wife to believe I had been cheating. How to prove her wrong?
Q. I want to know how to prove to my wife that I do not cheat on her. I go out once in a while on Fridays and get way too drunk. I want to stop, but that is another issue. I love my wife and do not cheat on here, but when I come home late after dri...
A. 2 March 2008: Well, Let's see here. You go drinking on Fridays. Your wife thinks you are cheating because you are hammered. You suggested "couples counseling? Hmmmmm..... Here's a novel idea.... How about having enough common sense to actually take your... (read in full...)
We became very familiar, having constant communication - how to avoid (falling in love with) him as I am already married?
Q. I have met this guy in a Christian group and he was married with 3 children and from the conversation that we have his relationship with his wife was not good for a long time when he discover that her wife has another affair with someone. We are ...
A. 2 March 2008: What a crock....Cheating is a conscious decision, and if you feel that you are falling for him and that you are going to cheat with him, then you better re-examine your faith. lol! QUIT YOUR GROUP! DUH! Work on YOUR marriage! DUH! Cut of c... (read in full...)
Why do men return to a destructive relationship with an ex?
Q. I recently dated a guy for about a two months, and it was very intense from the beginning for both of us. He spoke of future possibilities, and I began to open up to them as well. He then got scared, which is understandable--as I was scared, too. ...
A. 2 March 2008: Sometimes the adage "the Devil you know is better than the Devil you dont know" applies. I think it does in this case. Some people are gluttons for punishment. It's painfully obvious that this schlub is one of those people. If you had had been dat... (read in full...)
I found out my girlfriend of 7 years was having relations with another man...
Q. This is probalbly the dumbest question there is.... I found out my girlfriend of 7 years was having relations with another man. This was last April that I found out. It's almost been a year of recovery and trying my best. Well everything was f...
A. 27 February 2008: My friend...the fact that she's looking this guy spell disaster for your relationship. I'm sorry, but end it. let her see what she lost by her disrespect. I may be harsh, but if shecheated with this guy before and is looking him,she's gonna do it ... (read in full...)
Hmmmm.... do I believe her story? Do you???
Q. I left town for two weeks and when I came back one of our condoms was missing. She told me that her daughter's dad tried to have sex with her and she said no and he slept on the floor in the living room where I pay rent. She said she was out by ...
A. 27 February 2008: Allergic...... The Curb....make sure you drop her off there as soon as possible. The girl is lying. No ifs and or buts. That line about sleeping on the floor after the guy tried to have sex with her is about as fresh as a FOGHAT CONCERT! ... (read in full...)
She was dating a co-worker that I didn't know about until I had reason to check her texts messages...
Q. She was dating a co-worker that I didn't know about until I had reason to check her texts messages. If I had not done so I believe she would have kept it going. She told me that she has only been out with him twice once with other co-workers and ...
A. 27 February 2008: I'm gonna be blunt, and people don't like blunt, but here it goes. The answer is only three words, my friend.
RUN FROM THIS!!!!!!... (read in full...)
How I Got Here
Q. Finally I decided to write a synopsis of how I ended up here some six weeks ago. The following story is true in its entirety. I guess the reason I am writing it is because I would like others to hear my story and how even the most well intentioned ...
A. 27 February 2008: I want to thank everybody who left such nice comments on my article. Yes everyday is actually getting better. I find myself thinking less and less about what happened as I'm delving head first into my writing. I only wrote this thank you because ... (read in full...)
He's big, but he cums too quickly, how can we deal with this?
Q. My boyfriend and I have only been together for alittle over a month and just recently started having sex. My boyfriend has quite a big penis. We have had sex about five times now and each time he ejaculates quite quickly which doesn't give me enough ...
A. 25 February 2008: If you(or he) tightly squeeze the head of his Penis when he feels like he is going to ejaculate(just the head, not the shaft) you can quickly bring the feeling back to a normal level to where you can continue. Instead of having these answers about ... (read in full...)
How I Got Here
Q. Finally I decided to write a synopsis of how I ended up here some six weeks ago. The following story is true in its entirety. I guess the reason I am writing it is because I would like others to hear my story and how even the most well intentioned ...
A. 25 February 2008: I'd also like to provide an upate of just a few nights ago. After the birthday call(what angered me so much about it was that I had let "A" upset me so much that I went on vacation in Amsterdam and calledher from there and she hung up on me...ON MY ... (read in full...)
Why is he doing this? I would love to think he's in love with me...
Q. Dear All, I am a 25 yr old girl and I have a unique problem. There is a celebrity i was crazy about [like most of u are about celebs] and was quite active on his fan sites [esp de ones he frequented passively]. Now, before i joined the for...
A. 24 February 2008: Be carefull young lady....It may be one of the guys's entourage. But if you want to pursue a rock star, hey...the only one who will end up being hurt is you. Don't go into it thinking it's Bon Jovi and then you end up with GWAR!!!!Although... (read in full...)
He cheated on me and I can't get rid of the anger I feel towards him.
Q. hi my boyfriend cheated on me and i know he is sincerley sory and i want to forgive, though i try i just can't seem to get rid of this anger i feel towards him, even though i know he is sorry and has told me he regrets it cant explain why he did it ...
A. 23 February 2008: You dont stop. The only way you can heal is by dumping his cheating ass. Once a Cheater...Always a cheater. Especially if he says he does not know why he did it. It is an invitation for you to have the word DOORMAT on your head... (read in full...)
Do you think I was too far out of line by calling her, since I was sincerely worried?
Q. So, I've been looking for some help from various places, and this situation I'm in is quite the rough one. To start this off, it's an online relationship, we talk on the phone, but there's no real physical presence right now. Now, we were fr...
A. 23 February 2008: No...You were not out of line. She played on your feelings for her and then used it against you. She is a gameplayer and I WOULD STRONGLY SUGGEST YOU HAVE NOTHING MORE TO DO WITH HER. If she already claimed you were "stalkerish" nothing goodwill ... (read in full...)
Curious Physician
Q. Ok I'm 28 years old with two children. I have been married for 5 years. Me and my husband started to have marital problems during my last pregnancy. I started to tell my physician things in my marriage. He started off by asking me personal ...
A. 23 February 2008: That must be trully uncomfortable. I would suggest changing doctors, because it seems to me that this guy would like to deliver an unhealthy prognosis for your marriage. Please be careful.... (read in full...)
I had a one night stand a week before I got married and the guilt is tearing me apart...
Q. I am recently married but before I got married just a week before.... I am very upset to say that I had a one night stand... I was extremely drunk and do not even remember kissing this guy yet deep down inside knew that I was with this guy... there ...
A. 23 February 2008: Being Drunk is NO EXCUSE! What you did is begin your marriage on a lie. Better to tell your husband and take your punishment. The fact that you already have two children and you did this is appalling. You are using being drunk as an excuse. Don't! ... (read in full...)
It was wrong to cheat years ago, but do I have to suffer for the rest of my life!
Q. I am not for sure where to even begin. Here it goes! My BF and I have been together for 4years in the beginning of our relationship I cheated on him. I know it was wrong and I am not excusing myself for this, after a year he found out about ...
A. 21 February 2008: Speaking from experience with a cheater, he will never trust you again. It is pretty apparent that he does not so now. This behavior will most likely continue on his part. I'm not going to blame you, as you say you've done everything possible to try ... (read in full...)
My boyfriend is jealous of my ex and blew everything out of proportion, he even says he doesn't know if he wants to be with me! What do I do?
Q. I'm so sad... My boyfriend and I have been together for a year and a half. He's so jealous of my "ex"... this guy we both know, who used to be my friend with benefits years before I met my boyfriend. He's been jealous of him since he found out abou...
A. 19 February 2008: There is one thing you have left out of your post that may or may not be the reason he is acting the way he is. You said he "Found out" about you and your "ex". How did he "find out"? Did he ask you a specific question about this guy,did you offer ... (read in full...)
How can I move on from an affair?
Q. I'm trying so hard to get through the heart ache I feel after my three year affair with a married man, I too started out married. I must say what is helping me get through this is to see that other girls have been through a situation that i...
A. 19 February 2008: Both you and this man made a conscious decision to cheat. You sound like you want to be a victim. Think of the people you and this man victimized by your actions. Why is it that we are always supposed to feel sorry for cheaters? What a crock! If you ... (read in full...)
Am I bored with my boyfriend or this realtionship?
Q. My boyfriend and I met online and it is now one and half year were are together. I am now getting impatient cos we still haven't met each other though he always made plans but for some reason it alway postponed. Latest plan is he is coming this ...
A. 18 February 2008: You haven't met, and it's been a year and a half? I'm sorry this happened to you. I have experience in this field. I need to tell you that as harsh as this will sound, this other person probably has no intention of ever meeting you. I would consider ... (read in full...)
My girlfriend broke up with me to be with somebody else and did not accept my suggestion to remain friends, I do not understand what went wrong.
Q. First off i just wanna say thank you for all the help, i'm in an awkward situation, so any advice is greatly appreciated. Situation: About 4 weeks ago, my girlfriend of just under 3 years broke up with me. We had been dating for roughly 2 and a ...
A. 18 February 2008: As hard as it may be right now, and I know you have a lot of emotional investment in this girl, just let it go for the time being. She'll eventually find a crack or two in her new Knight's armor and wonder what could have been with you. The ... (read in full...)
A husband who loves his wife doesn't say things like that to her right...?
Q. My husband and I got into an arguement last evening. He was having a beer during dinner and kept on commenting how good the beer tastes throughout dinner and after dinner. While then, I said to him that flowers are nice to give, especially if one ...
A. 18 February 2008: You ever stop to think about how this started? Your updated post says he had 1 beer. You came at him with the flowers thing. There has to be something you are not telling us here. This is not a natural progression in an argument,by any means. For an ... (read in full...)
Summer vacation in safety - New York City or Los Angeles? Please help me decide.
Q. Ok, this is not a relationship problem. I want to take my daughter on a vacation this summer and I have two choices. Either Los Angelos where we will have to rent a car but we can go to the beaches and also go shopping on rodeo drive (mind you we ...
A. 17 February 2008: Neither..Try Chicago! Much better architecture, much richer history than either of those two cities. Much better food than either New York or Los Angeles by far!... (read in full...)
Falling in love with a much younger woman...what to do?
Q. Hello all. I'm seeking advice on a very heart wrenching problem I'm trying to sort out. I'm a 36 year old man who works with a 23 year old woman. Both her and I are in exclusive dating relationships but not married. I think it's safe to say that ...
A. 16 February 2008: Have you told the 23 year old that you love her? If you havent, Don't! If you have, you have opened up a can of worms that are going to affect more than just you and the 23 year old. HONESTY is always the best policy. And tell your current partner ... (read in full...)
My ex may have a new guy, and I fear they slept together yesterday. How can I stop torturing myself??
Q. Since I found out my ex has met somebody new, I just can't get her out of my head... AGAIN!! We hadn't spoken for a long time, but about a week ago, we got back into the habit of talking to eachother again. We had done this before, but last...
A. 16 February 2008: Quit Beating a dead horse. This girl is contacting you and is playing games to mess with you. And you are playing right into it. Do not speak to her again.
BTW Trust what Dr V is telling you. Many people dont want to hear the truth. He gave me ... (read in full...)
I can't cope with the long distance relationship so I decided to break up during his visit in my country. Good idea? What to say to him?
Q. Hi, I really need advice on how to let my boyfriend go easily. We have a very long-distance relationship, he's older than me (21), i'm 17 but he is like my 4th boyfriend, i am his first. So as u all probably know, it really hurts when ur f...
A. 15 February 2008: I agree wit Ask Eve 100 percent. You HAVE TO BE HONEST. A lack of honesty will lead to nothing but intensely bad blood. How do I know?
About 6 weeks ago my long distance girlfriend abandoned me. No response to email, phone calls, textes, etc. Gra... (read in full...)
Valentine's Day when we are in between relationships...
Q. Valentine's Day s____. That’s right I’m saying it. Here is a day dedicated to love. For most the holiday celebrates the love between two people together and in romantic love. It’s a wonderful day for lovers. But for those of us not in l...
A. 14 February 2008: Today's My birthday! I am alone again after telling my freak stripper girlfriend to F&$K Off this morning because I caught her lying AGAIN. On this day of all days? You think you got it bad?
PUUHHHLLLEEESE!... (read in full...)
Does she want me or not??
Q. My girl friend is very hard to understand there are times when i feel like she wants me then other times she acts like she doesn't want me around; during these times i'll try to call her and she doesn't answer me so then i stop trying. After ...
A. 14 February 2008: She's a game player...pure and simple!
Kick her to the curb. You don't need that!... (read in full...)
He dated my mum first. Is this so wrong?
Q. The guy that I have really strong feelings for has dated my mom in the past over a decade ago. They were intimate and had a sexual relationship. This is not an ideal situation and normally I'm not interested in this type of dating, I don't like to ...
A. 13 February 2008: Do you live in the South?
This is a no brainer....
You have issues to work out with your mom, and your post makes it seem like you are doing this to spite her. Take a look at the cost/benefit ratio here. You know this is ridiculous.
S... (read in full...)
I want to redress the situation, but I can't physically take the pain she puts me through with her "I'm over you" attitude. Any point in persisting?...
Q. Hi there. My and my ex decided to mutually end our relationship 6 weeks ago. We would have been together 3 years tomorrow. We've had a strange relationship, sometimes it being long distance, and sometimes almost giving up our normal lives for each ...
A. 13 February 2008: She's sticking the dagger in you and twisting it. Friends and family will tell you what you want to hear. We Agony Aunts and Uncles will tell you waht you NEED to hear. I agree with Dazzerg that the last sliver is the worst, and the most painful... (read in full...)
Is it too soon to meet cheating fiance?
Q. Hello, I've been dating this guy for over a year. We've talked about getting married this summer and having children. Then, this happens... He recently cheated on me and I found out about it. Since then, our relationship has been st...
A. 13 February 2008: Once a cheater...ALWAYS A CHEATER. I know it hurts like hell, but fear of committment is a lame excuse that says "I need to get laid". He will continue to do this. I've said it before and I'll say iy again. Cheaters are the scum of the ear... (read in full...)
Why do I feel uncomfortable.
Q. my g/f for a year wants to go to las vegas to spend the weekend with an old guy friend of hers and a group of friends of theres i have never met any of them. she has some history with him meaning she lived with him , and has slept with him. says it ...
A. 13 February 2008: Dude..... NO WAY. NO WAY. Uh..... you just don't up and leave to go to Vegas with a bunch of people from your past and she doesnt want you around? Something is rotten in Denmark, buddy. And it's her. If she is Demanding a reason, she i... (read in full...)
Is you're opinion he's cheating or not?
Q. I need to know what you think, my boyfriend and I have been together for almost 3 years. Even though I've never caught him, I suspect he's cheating, I have checked his cell phone bills I never seem to find anything out of the ordinary. THe thing is, ...
A. 13 February 2008: CherryChick, Lets look at the facts. 1) You know he already lies about miniscule things 2) The texts from this other girl 3) "Preferably without the girlfriend" 4) They had sex before you two were an item 5) They are still in contact I ... (read in full...)
I don't want to be a neurotic, possessive gf but...is he cheating on me??
Q. My boyfriend (34 yrs old) and I have a long distance relationship. We felt we were not seeing each other enough, so I made the effort to book all my holiday off on days that my boyfriend is off work yet so that we could spend more time together ...
A. 12 February 2008: It is a clear sign that he has someone else. No one does that with the phone(going to the bathroom 3 times in an hour) unless he had the runs or is incontinent. I'm sorry to say this, but I am afraid that you should consider giving this up. I agree ... (read in full...)
Only 3 days ago I met a nice guy online, and I feel like risking my 3-year relationship for him! What should I do?
Q. Me and my boyfriend have been dating for 3 and a half years but about three days ago I met a guy on a chat line, he has been very nice to me and I started to get feelings for him. I love my boyfriend very much and don't believe in cheating but I ...
A. 11 February 2008: I REPEAT....DO NOT DO IT. I was emotionally scammed by a woman online. Everytime we were to meet something came up. Like a significant other. There are all sorts of predators and manipulative people on the net. Please be true to yourself. This forum ... (read in full...)
My girlfriend is a stripper
Q. OK well this really isnt a normal scenario although having a girlfriend who is a stripper isnt normal to begin with. Anyways it makes it harder for me since i am in the military. Before i start we are both in our early 20's. I come back from bei...
A. 10 February 2008: I was in a similar position a short time back. You are not going to change her mind. In her mind, you are already yesterday's news. You've been gone 6 months? She most likely has not been faithful to you either. The stripping profession is rife with ... (read in full...)
Met her in the internet, she said she'd be back in my life by the end of the year as she planned to move closer to where I live. Do I drown my suspicions and wait out?
Q. Ok so I met this girl a year ago on the internet, she lives across the country from me. We instantly hit it off and spent hours talking to each other. After a few months we met up and we were inseperable for the whole day. A month or two lat...
A. 9 February 2008: I have been in the SAME Type of situation as you, young man. It is not pretty. My online dating situation roughly ended(maybe, maybe not...it depends on what day it is)with my gal hanging up on me after the surprise phone call to her house. Hushed ... (read in full...)
Only 3 days ago I met a nice guy online, and I feel like risking my 3-year relationship for him! What should I do?
Q. Me and my boyfriend have been dating for 3 and a half years but about three days ago I met a guy on a chat line, he has been very nice to me and I started to get feelings for him. I love my boyfriend very much and don't believe in cheating but I ...
A. 9 February 2008: Do Not Do It. I myself was in a situation online with someone who told me everything I wanted to hear. This woman proved to be nothing more than a manipulative liar. Tread Lightly. Think about what you are saying....3 days? I would try to search ... (read in full...)
Am I being played for a fool? Should I even talk to her?
Q. Ok. I was with this girl for 2years. We broke up in August of 2007. We had an on going relationship, even having sex until October. Around mid November i cut it off, and didn't speak to her again until a bit before New years. Since we broke up we ...
A. 30 January 2008: I have to agree with both Kitten and Waterloo here. You answered your own question. By referring to her as a "skank" it is obvious that you have some trust issues with her, as I'm sure she has with you. Best for both of you to let the sun set on ... (read in full...)
She does not want me to be a reason of her break up but we have slept together behind her boyfriend's back. What next? I love her...
Q. I have fallen in love with a girl I've known for a year now the problem is she has a boyfriend almost the same amount of time. we have discussed the issue and her excuse is she doesnt want me to be the reason they break up but we have slept ...
A. 26 January 2008: She doesn't want you to be the reason? YOU ARE THE REASON, MAN! By sleeping with her, you are the perfect excuse for her. You're an accomplice whether you like it or not. You mind as well end it RIGHT NOW,because guess what?
Once a cheater.... (read in full...)
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