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*rimmReality

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I messed up and I'm too scared to text or call him

Q.   Well ok once again there was these two guys I was talking to at the same time one guys name is Kyle and the others name is phashaud well me and phashaud been talking on and off for a while now and I've started to love him very much, now Kyle on the ...

A.   24 November 2013: Do yourself and both guys a favor and leave both of them be. You can learn a valuable lesson from this that part of being an adult is taking responsibility for our actions and you would be best served by moving forward without stringing people ... (read in full...)

Guys, would you take her back?

Q.   This is a question for the guys, mostly! If you were a 29-year-old male, newly divorced, and in love with a new woman, would you take this woman back? - You have your daughter for the weekend, and decide to surprise your new girlfriend of ...

A.   3 October 2013: Only if you are delusional or a cuckhold would you want to press forward If someone does not respect themself, nobody will respect them... (read in full...)

I cheated and now my boyfriend wants concrete evidence that I won't cheat or go back to the other guy!

Q.   I have been in a very stable relationship with my boyfriend and we were supposed to get married end of January.I did something horrible and i cheated on him a few weeks before we got married and now he wont take me back. The truth is i love my boyfr...

A.   24 February 2013: Sadly, what you did is probably a deal breaker. However if you even want to have anywhere near a cahnce it would probably be advisable to send the OM (with your boyfriend's approval and his final approval on any version you send, and also in front ... (read in full...)

Still madly in love with my girlfriend, but all my old feelings for my friend have come rushing back! What does this mean?

Q.   I use to know this girl,, we we're just friends, kissed a few times but nothing more then that, anyway i got into a relationship with a different girl and everything was great, a year later, i find myself still madly in love with my girlfriend but i ...

A.   8 October 2012: You are young....best to think real hard if pining for somebody you bumped into is fair to your GF. These things have a way of coming back to bite you in the arse so you would probably be better off letting your GF know what happened..because ... (read in full...)

I'm terrified he will post naked pictures of me on the internet! Is that illegal?

Q.   I split up with my boyfriend because I found him on a dating site. He keeps saying he was set up, he deleted the account and it actually says closed by user so there's 100% proof he did it. He got nasty and said I'd set it up or my friends or sister ...

A.   8 October 2012: Problem is that you let him take the pics in the first place. I know it is probably not what you want to hear, but when we are in relationships, we tend to allow ourselves to do things we normally would not do(i.e. having a BF take nude pics). ... (read in full...)

To tell? Or not to tell? I cheated twice on him

Q.   Hi everyone! I've asked two questions before about my relationship with my bf of 4 1/2 years. Well I have another question for everyone. I cheated on my boyfriend twice wit 2 different guys. SHould I tell him? I mean I know if I tell him everything ...

A.   8 September 2011: You are only NOT telling him because you are protecting yourself. and that is about as selfish as you can be. Be honest with him, and let him decide the course of his own life and this relationship. You LOST that right the second you cheated on him.... (read in full...)

I have done the right thing and ended my affair, but how do I now cope with the emptiness?

Q.   I am not proud of my affair. I am not that kind of a person. She and I met at work and became close. Her marriage was on the rocks, she has 1 kid and I was living away from my wife and daughter for various reasons. It just happened, first ...

A.   18 June 2011: It didn't 'just happen" lol. You made a conscious choice to cheat on your wife. You are in the Fog but the best thing you can do is own your actions and be honest with your wife. You lost any right to determine the future of your marriage once you ... (read in full...)

Is my gf cheating on me?

Q.   Basically what I want to know, is whether or not my girlfriend is cheating on me. After a bad break-up my fiancee and I got back together, against many friend's wishes.. But lately she is texting ALL the time when she's with me, it's either ...

A.   6 June 2011: Dump her...it will get no better...and yes she is cheating on you...trust your gut...... (read in full...)

I think girlfriend likes to make me jealous

Q.   ok need to straighten thoughts in my head,my girlfriend of 3 years is and allways has been quite open but more so in last 6 or so months mainly in the fact that she seems to like telling me about guys that fancy her and want her etc,nothing has ...

A.   24 January 2011: Yeah sit her down and tell her this bothers you...after the response you got from her last time you think the result will be any different? Don't be surprised when she tells you about all your best buddies hitting on her when you aren't around too, ... (read in full...)

Text messages lead me to believe she wants her ex boyfriend/casual partner more then me!

Q.   My fiance and I have been together for over a year. At first, like all relationships, things started off great, we'd text all the time, the sex was regular, we were both affectionate to each other. However, over the last few months, things have cha...

A.   24 January 2011: The only thing you need to do is find the nearest curb to kick your fiance to it...Engagements are a dress rehearsal for a life together and if she is doing this crap now, better to jettison her than to be stuck with a mortgage, a bald head and a ... (read in full...)

Text messages lead me to believe she wants her ex boyfriend/casual partner more then me!

Q.   My fiance and I have been together for over a year. At first, like all relationships, things started off great, we'd text all the time, the sex was regular, we were both affectionate to each other. However, over the last few months, things have cha...

A.   24 January 2011: The only thing you need to do is find the nearest curb to kick your fiance to it...Engagements are a dress rehearsal for a life together and if she is doing this crap now, better to jettison her than to be stuck with a mortgage, a bald head and a ... (read in full...)

Is it risky of me to do this no contact for a month knowing I want my BF and the relationship back?

Q.   ok so ive been with my bf for 4 years he cheated..he confessed it and told me that it made him realize how much me and the relationship meant to him and he was willing to prove to me how much he wanted this relationship and to earn my ...

A.   27 December 2010: You have to show him consequences for his actions. Because you allowing him to remain in contact he will eventually break you down and you will cave and take him back...then he will do it again, and you will be back here going "how did I let this ... (read in full...)

Husband got girl pregnant twice!!

Q.   What would u do if your husband had 1 baby while yall was not together and you let him come back home and you find out he got another one on the way by the same girl...

A.   26 November 2010: Well why would you have taken him back in the first place is real question...I mean come on! You see you gave him no consequences for his actions the first time around...and he sees you as a doormat, which sadly you have become. Ever heard of... (read in full...)

Would you say he's controlling?

Q.   Is my boyfriend controlling me? I have been dating this guy for a year and four months. Some insight into our relationship: I have cheated on him. (Kissed an ex at a party) And told him in a hurtful way. That was four months ago. Since then...

A.   13 November 2010: The question is not whether he is controlling, but how YOUR actions, and subsequent attitude toward your own actions have landed you in this predicament Your relationship has run it's course....He does not trust you, and frankly from what you writ... (read in full...)

My boyfriend cheated and lied like he was going for an emmy!

Q.   My boyfriend charles and I have been together for a year and 5 months. We have a three month old baby boy. During the last few weeks of my pregnancy we took a break. during this break he proposed that we would only have sex with each other we would ...

A.   28 October 2010: Cheating is never a 'Mistake". It is a conscious decision. You have a snapshot of your future. Don't waste it on this guy. Run from this.... (read in full...)

This email made me suspicious

Q.   where do i start, my partner of 3 years works away so only see him every 3 months which is hard we get on really really well we never argue. but suddenly i got an email of a girl saying oh i know ur boyfriend we got out for drinks together when im ...

A.   16 September 2010: You are long distance, you can't be sure of anything.... Case in point young lady: Just this past spring I met a woman Through Mafia Wars who came onto me on Facebook. Lived in Canada,(I'm in the U.S.) very pretty. Very stable(or so I thou... (read in full...)

This email made me suspicious

Q.   where do i start, my partner of 3 years works away so only see him every 3 months which is hard we get on really really well we never argue. but suddenly i got an email of a girl saying oh i know ur boyfriend we got out for drinks together when im ...

A.   16 September 2010: Unless there is complete trust and communication in a LDR they will never work. Speaking from experience they rarely do. Could be harmless but what is the point of her emailing you? Knowing you are far away and you don't see your BF very often...... (read in full...)

She constantly accuses me of cheating

Q.   My girl and I have been together for over two years lived together two yrs this month. In that two years, she has cheated once, we were broken up for a bit. Has failed to find/keep a job, doesn't clean w/ being told, doesn't wake up with our 5mo old ...

A.   16 September 2010: Why put yourself through this? usually when someone constantly accuses a partner of cheating it is because either they themselves are and are projecting upon the other to lessen their guilt or they have some self esteem issues. Or a combination of ... (read in full...)

What about clubbing?

Q.   Clubbing Question.. Where do you stand on clubbing? My significant other likes to go out and club every couple of months. I told her Im ok with anything she does that she would be comfortable doing if I was in the room. Well.. She got wasted one n...

A.   16 September 2010: This is a dress rehearsal for another incident in the future...who's to say if you really got the whole story.....You expect her to tell you the full story when she says things "happen"??? lol...please dude...things like that don't "happen"... (read in full...)

Should I apologise to a girl that thinks I'm a stalker???

Q.   This girl really hurt my feelings when she called me a stalker... but I was not stalking her - or harrassing her. I just sent her messages on myspace saying 'hi' and that I hoped she had a good day... and then I left her alone. She then came into ...

A.   16 September 2010: This is drama you don't need...believe me if she is going to call you a stalker 3 months after the fact and that is the only contact you have had, then you must understand that even addressing her now is futile. IGNORE, IGNORE, IGNORE... (read in full...)

Why won't my boyfriend put on facebook that he is in a relationship

Q.   My bf friend, put on facebook that he has a relationship with a girl, sooo then why the hell doesnt my bf dooo that. He wont put where in a relationship. And we have been dating for awhile, and we have had sex. Whats wrong with him??...

A.   16 September 2010: Gabriella... One reason and one reason only..... Listing yourself as "In a relationship" limits someones possibilities. because lets face it...everyone is looking to some extent. If he lists himself as committed he mat miss out on some ego stro... (read in full...)

Online romance and fake pictures?

Q.   me and my boyfriend started dating online we've been together for 2 months now and he has faked many pics, i have asked him before if he was lying to me but he has said that his friends just put them on the internet. how do i know if he's lyi...

A.   16 September 2010: The fact of the matter, young lady is that online dating is a minefield at best. The person behind that screen can be anyone, can be anything. Then you get sucked into what they tell you, as you can only take them at face value. and then you begin ... (read in full...)

I had an affair and I feel I can't escape it

Q.   i really need some advice...i was involved in a an affair a couple of months ago with someone close to my husband...i ended it because i knew i was doing wrong..my husband really loves me and honestly i dont know why i did it...well maybe because i ...

A.   31 July 2010: I suggest you reread your reply to all of us... YOU STILL DON'T GET IT POLLINA!! You are making every excuse and justification in the damn book...you rattle them off like every other script a cheater has...Your situation is not unique...no ones... (read in full...)

I had an affair and I feel I can't escape it

Q.   i really need some advice...i was involved in a an affair a couple of months ago with someone close to my husband...i ended it because i knew i was doing wrong..my husband really loves me and honestly i dont know why i did it...well maybe because i ...

A.   30 July 2010: I suggest you come clean with your husband...you know EXACTLY why you cheated...because you thought about only yourself. Now is the time for you to own what you did since cheated. You lost the right to determine the future of your marriage... (read in full...)

I have to follow my heart and be with my love but I have a husband!

Q.   I am married to a fantastic man and 2 beautiful children. My husband has been working alot, we are trying to save money to buy a house so we are in a rental now and it seems this is the hardest time for us. It is like we just co-exist in the same ...

A.   12 July 2010: Lady, you need to grow up and think of somebody else other than yourself. All this "Follow my Heart" crap is just that...CRAP Here is how it's going to go down..... You run off with Jailbird Joe. Everything is just great at first because its ... (read in full...)

I cheated on her 3 years ago and now she doesn't believe me or trust me

Q.   My girlfriend and I have been dating for 4 years now. During our first year of dating o cheated on her now she doesn't believe anything that I say I'm doing when I'm not with her!...

A.   6 July 2010: That's the price you pay for cheating on her. What do you want, a telethon? Dude, only through actions and not words can you ever hope to build trust. apparently your behaviors have not convinced her that you are being faithful. I suggest you... (read in full...)

I really don't know if I want the truth because then our relationship has been built on decite and lies.

Q.   I have been married for a long time and I believe we love each other. My wife claims she only had one sexual relationship before me but it was multiple times. I had to learn this from friends before I confronted her and she admitted it to be true. I ...

A.   6 July 2010: None of us can give you the advice you truly deserve without particulars as to what are your reasons for believing that she is unfaithful at his juncture. You are too vague. Any of us can tell you that you are imagining this all from what yo... (read in full...)

Why do I have these feelings for another man when I was so sure I loved my fiance?

Q.   I have been with my fiance for two years, yes fiance, I was so sure I loved him more then anything and when Im with him hes all I care about, but when Im gone from him and one of my friends(male) comes around and drops hints he likes me...I feel the ...

A.   1 July 2010: You need to get a grip. You are in a fog and I dare say that an engagement is a dress rehearsal for a life together. Relationships take a lot of work. You are simply justifying the feelings this guy stirs in you, He isn't much of a friend nor ... (read in full...)

I have caught my girl cheating three times!

Q.   my girl has been cheating on me, i have caught her more than three time now, she saying that she will not do it again but she keep liyimg to me , im fed up ,what do i do? [Mod note: text was edited for clarity. I hope I got it right.]...

A.   28 June 2010: Take it from me.... RUN AS FAST AS YOU CAN!!!... (read in full...)

Falling for his best friend!

Q.   Ok, here's the thing. I'm 20 years old and the guy I'm dating is 17. I've been dating him for almost 3 years and he has changed since we started dating. He's a more depressed and angry person now and he goes off on me more often. He gets mad easy. ...

A.   2 June 2010: You already have hurt him...you allowed someone that is not your boyfriend to rub up on you. You have kept this from him...and you have had phone sex with the guy. I can't believe in light of everything you have posted that you feel confused... (read in full...)

Is my bad gut feeling something I should listen to?

Q.   so my girlfriend and i had a brake up but we are trying to make things work up she lied to me and said she was going over to a friends how but really she she went to a party a languire party at that and she had a crush on another guy but she wont ...

A.   2 June 2010: She not only lied to you about her whereabouts but went to a lingerie party to see a guy she was crushing on.... and on top of that she will not tell you if she did anything with this guy? I am afraid that you risk becoming a lifelong doo... (read in full...)

My wife is noticing that I'm constantly on the internet

Q.   Well ive bin married for five years now and i recently got a computer to keep contact with my friends and fam. But i have found my self in a situation im falling for a girl i met online that lives milles away from were i live. MY question is could ...

A.   2 June 2010: You are living your life in internet fantasy air...take it from me it happened to me a couple of years ago. Almost happened to me again recently as I discovered by accident that some female I was communicating with and getting ready to meet from... (read in full...)

Lost, don't know what to do?

Q.   Hi, I've been married for 17 years. There is a 12 year age gap between me and my husband. At first it did not seem to matter, but now he has turned 50 and has no teeth, i'm struggling. I have had 2 one night stands in the past and felt very g...

A.   21 March 2010: You make no sense...you are a cheater plain and simple...stop justifying and act like a damn adult... (read in full...)

I have hurt my wife - how do I make amends?

Q.   I met my wife while taking a professional course last year. Both of us weren't attracted to one another at first, but as she failed one particular test and I coached her, we gradually got closer and eventually fell in love with each other. Alth...

A.   20 March 2010: Hey don't hate on Brunel, he was stating the OBVIOUS Everyone has dysfunction of some sort. Words and excuses are cheap. It will only be through actions on your part which will eve help your relationship. What have you done for her to SHOW... (read in full...)

Height verses penis size!

Q.   okay, the girl i am dating now is around 5'5" and very good shape. She has a very nice body not fat not too skinny. but my question is i am 6' tall with a 6" length and 5" width penis. is there any way that her being that little that i might hurt ...

A.   20 March 2010: 5 inch width? What the hell you packing, a Mickey's Malt Liquor down there? If you are really five inches wide It'll feel like she is giving birth. Did you pass your math class, young man?... (read in full...)

What do men think about "scruffy" women?

Q.   What do men think about "scruffy" women? Hi - I am a bit of a hippy chic who goes to a lot of gigs/festivals with other hippyish friends. I have never been particularly smart (eg glossy hair/perfect nails) and even if I wanted to I'm never good wit...

A.   20 March 2010: Nothing wrong with it...wanna go to a Hawkwind show?... (read in full...)

Lost, don't know what to do?

Q.   Hi, I've been married for 17 years. There is a 12 year age gap between me and my husband. At first it did not seem to matter, but now he has turned 50 and has no teeth, i'm struggling. I have had 2 one night stands in the past and felt very g...

A.   20 March 2010: Sorry lady, regardless of how your marriage is, you had the choice to either attempt marriage counseling, or to be adult enough to communicate with your husband exactly what your needs are(doesn't he deserve that? Do you even know what HIS needs ... (read in full...)

My gf has really bad trust issues...what should I do?

Q.   0k. so me and my girlfriend have been dating for almost two years now. We live together. We even moved to a totally different city 4 hrs away from our hometown. We know no one but ourselves. But somehow she keeps finding ways to accuse me of ...

A.   20 March 2010: Sorry and I hate to say(I'm just floating it out there) is that a person tends to blame shift when it is indeed THEM that are cheating. When it gets to a point of her accusing you of having anal sex with male co workers, the fact that she would be ... (read in full...)

What should I do about my girlfriend hitting me?

Q.   My girlfriend has started hitting me lately when we argue. Any feedback on what I should do is much appreciated. We have been dating for over a year. We rarely fought during the first year. However, recently we have started fighting more. W...

A.   11 March 2010: Get rid of her. As opposed to societal norms(which are total bullshit) You do have a right to defend yourself when attacked. I dated a chick who had a serious cocaine problem years ago and got pissed off when I was not paying attention to her... (read in full...)

This marine is coming on to my woman!!!

Q.   This guy that recently left for the marines told my girlfriend that he was in love with her and was going to come back for her and was going to write a book about her and all this other stuff. So I told her that it would be for the best to drop all ...

A.   10 March 2010: Instant drama because 3 is a crowd. she is going to talk to him behind your back at this point so its best to make the decision for her before she ends up cheating on you. sounds like she has stars in her eyes from the jukebox hero already...a... (read in full...)

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