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| | GrimmReality's profile:It is unfair to both of us if I am not brutally honest. So don't take it personal if I think you are wrong, because most likely you are.
Thus my ratings take dramatic swings because most people can't handle the truth...If you are seething at this paragraph already it's probably because Ive made you look in the mirror.
You will find that I tell you what you need to hear, rather than worry about being popular. I provide honest and REALISTIC advice
If you are deserving of compassion you will get it. If you deserve a wake up call, you will get that too.
Cheaters Beware.....I treat you without mercy! I have little or no compassion at all for cheaters, for you are the scum of the Earth.
Once again, take the advice or leave it....I really don't care.
SMD FOREVER! |
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I found out my sister is cheating on her fiance, what do I do?
Q. I am not one to 'stay out of it' when I find a person cheating on their boyfriend/girlfriend. However, I recently found out that my sister has been repeatedly cheating on her fiance (they have been together about 4 1/2 years. My brother accidentally ...
A. 3 November 2009: If you let them get married and he finds out(which he eventually will) that she not only cheated but her family members knew about it he'd have every right to spit in your face. Family or not doing what is right is what has to be done. How'd y... (read in full...)
She cheated on me and I forgive her, but now she does not know what she wants.
Q. Well here it goes, I was went on vacation and I kept in contact with my girlfriend that I love very much, and i suspected something was going on and I was right She was cheating on me and she admitted it and asked me to forgive her I was raged but I ...
A. 1 November 2009: lol....come on. You cheated..she cheated..and now she wants to keep the guy she cheated with as a friend? And is "confused"?
lol that translates into " I want to mess around with both of you"... I suggest you move on and learn a lesson from thi... (read in full...)
Help I'm caught in the middle...
Q. Once again, thank you all agony aunts for answering my questions for years, dunno what I would do without all of you!! The situation I'm in is rather complicated. Me and my boyfriend have been on/off for 3 years, but he's finally very committed t...
A. 23 October 2009: Well that changes my original advice.
(Oh thats right...once again it was REJECTED...so I guess I'll go with this)
If someone promises they aren't sleeping with somebody else and then lies about it, regardless then the dumb idiot gets what ... (read in full...)
Help I'm caught in the middle...
Q. Once again, thank you all agony aunts for answering my questions for years, dunno what I would do without all of you!! The situation I'm in is rather complicated. Me and my boyfriend have been on/off for 3 years, but he's finally very committed t...
A. 23 October 2009: It was none of your business in the first place, especially if they are now broken up. It did no good to bring it up if they are no longer exclusive. It seems very immature on your part and will probably have some real ramifications as to whether ... (read in full...)
Ok to cheat on him to get pregnant and then tell him its his?
Q. I have been with my bf for 2 years and love him to def! Now... we have been trying to have a baby the last 6 months with no success. I know it is not ME with any issues because I have had 2 pregnancies before and got pregnant RIGHT away. I ...
A. 23 October 2009: Well he probably jerks off 2-3 times a day becuase he realises he has an idiot for a girlfriend, and would rather have sex with his own hand. Did you discuss this with your Co-workers at MacDonald's? ... (read in full...)
I know this is long, but I really need help. any advice or insight will be incredibly appreciated
Q. This is the backstory to the question. My girlfriend and I have been going out for almost 2 years. We love each other very much. We have a stunning amount in common and a very powerful connection ie ( knowing what each other is thinking) calling ...
A. 23 October 2009: Once again if you actually read my response you would know I am in agreement with you as far as this toxic woman. I questioned the poster's intellect in acceptance to admitting in principle to her that he raped her when clearly he didn't. That cou... (read in full...)
I know this is long, but I really need help. any advice or insight will be incredibly appreciated
Q. This is the backstory to the question. My girlfriend and I have been going out for almost 2 years. We love each other very much. We have a stunning amount in common and a very powerful connection ie ( knowing what each other is thinking) calling ...
A. 23 October 2009: Well all I can say is that No means no. That being said you were man enough to stop. However.... Yes she is pulling your strings like a puppet master But you know, you cheated on her too, because you weren't getting sex. You should have bro... (read in full...)
Did I make the right move by backing off?
Q. so i meet this guy six months ago, we had a lot of fun together, no fights at all. His old girlfriends parents see us out together, so she begins to call him! so im sure now he has mixed feelings. They dated on and off for years, one sided from him, ...
A. 23 October 2009: Yep...you did the right thing. As long as the this toxic female is around shaking her tail feathers it will affect every aspect of your relationship.
You are a much better person for taking the initiative and acting. This way it puts the onus on ... (read in full...)
What if she chooses smoking over me?
Q. hey i have a problem with my girlfriend she used to smoke before we hooked up and quit when we became official because she knows that i wouldnt be with someone that smokes for reasons i told her. we are going to a party this Saturday and she said ...
A. 22 October 2009: It's her choice or not to smoke. She will either do it or not. You have your opinion, but when you give ultimatums based on things like this, you dont have much of a relationship.
If it bothers you so much then break up with her. That is your cho... (read in full...)
I have low self esteem, slept with another guy and know I should tell my b/f but I'm afraid!
Q. Hi, I have been with my boyfriend for 4 years. I love him so much; he is gorgeous, intelligent good job etc. I could not ask for someone better. From what he has told me he feels the same way about me. However we have big relationship pro...
A. 22 October 2009: Just becuase you "told him" does not leave you with any right to determine the future of your relationship. You lost that right the minute you screwed somebody else You think his love for you is strong...don't be so sure. These things have a te... (read in full...)
Am I being selfish for doing what I am doing and hoping she gets caught?
Q. I still need Advice. Back in December of 2008 I reconnected with my high school sweetheart. We have not had contact since 1993. I was browsing around on Facebook and found her. I thought that it would be nice to catch up on old times with her. ...
A. 22 October 2009: " Well just to clarify this. She is not married to the other guy. They have been together for 7 years but no marriage. The were engaged 5 of those 7 years. She did give the ring back to him back this summer after taking it off in Febuary, I really ... (read in full...)
Am I being selfish for doing what I am doing and hoping she gets caught?
Q. I still need Advice. Back in December of 2008 I reconnected with my high school sweetheart. We have not had contact since 1993. I was browsing around on Facebook and found her. I thought that it would be nice to catch up on old times with her. ...
A. 22 October 2009: How in the hell can you be so selfish...either of you. You know, it's one thing for her to break up with him and then see you, but this back and forth cheating on both of your parts..you should both be ashamed of yourself. If I was that guy Id ... (read in full...)
What gives?
Q. Ok so here goes.. My BF and I agreed to take things slow. He said we needed to talk. This was after 6 weeks of no contact. He said he loves me and cares about me. We made plans to get together to talk and grab a bite to eat on Friday. Frid...
A. 22 October 2009: RUN!...the guy is seeing someone else, and you are the last to know... (read in full...)
My girlfriend hid the fact she had a son. Could this indicate a potential pattern of lying?
Q. Girlfriend of three months tells me via text message that she has a son. We just started getting slightly serious, and I still feel a little lied to. I am 25, she 23, I have no idea how old her son is. I had no idea that she had a son, not e...
A. 22 October 2009: WHY ARE YOU EVEN LETTING HER BACK INTO YOUR HOUSE? I am sorry, but if you refuse to see the absurdity of her excuses, then there is little any one of us can do to help you. I suggest you go down to the store in the morning and get an etching s... (read in full...)
I'm married to someone else but he said he'd wait. Should I trust him?
Q. I have met a most wonderful guy, only thing he lives 2hrs away from where I live, so I dont get to see as we would like.The first two week of our relationship, we email and text contantly. One weekend he got a email from his EX, which upset him and ...
A. 22 October 2009: Well being that you are emotionally cheating on your husband at the very least, I suggest you end this farce at once. You certainly cant find love in your own relationship if you are looking for love outside of it. I mean, come on, lady!! Y... (read in full...)
Am I her booty call?
Q. I met this girl about 2 months ago, we hit it off on the first date, on the second date she spent the entire weekend at my place. This happened for 2 more weekends, then one night during the week she told me that she had been having sex with ...
A. 22 October 2009: Dude...YOU ARE GETTING PLAYED! Don't let this toxic woman into your life...she is up to no good and for all you know wshe is telling this guy the same thing. who's to say that there arent others? Dude, I know the power of the pussy is hard to... (read in full...)
My girlfriend hid the fact she had a son. Could this indicate a potential pattern of lying?
Q. Girlfriend of three months tells me via text message that she has a son. We just started getting slightly serious, and I still feel a little lied to. I am 25, she 23, I have no idea how old her son is. I had no idea that she had a son, not e...
A. 22 October 2009: OH COME ON!
somebody you date for three months waits that long to tell you they have a child?
Uh thats a red flag right there. I am sorry, but that is a HUGE omission to leave out. I'd not be seriously getting involved with this woman at al... (read in full...)
I flashed him online and now I'm worried he'll put it on Youtube...
Q. Hi.I have something worry about last night. I had met with that guy on the internet. We chat at online last night. Its our first time chatting. We was chatting about 3 hours and we have little conversation about sex. And I've show him my upper body ...
A. 21 October 2009: Sure! There is always that possibilty. But not on YouTube I own some adult sites myself and I will tell you many times people post stills from webcams that they take and recieve. And then later use them as profile pics on adult dating sites like ... (read in full...)
I have low self esteem, slept with another guy and know I should tell my b/f but I'm afraid!
Q. Hi, I have been with my boyfriend for 4 years. I love him so much; he is gorgeous, intelligent good job etc. I could not ask for someone better. From what he has told me he feels the same way about me. However we have big relationship pro...
A. 21 October 2009: Just when I thought there was consensus I ran across this question.. To quote Frank Costanza "SERENITY NOW! SERENITY NOW! SERENITY NOW"!... (read in full...)
Questions about my ex: Does she still have feelings for me and why am I so bothered by the idea of her having sex with her new boyfriend?
Q. [Moderator's Note: 2 Questions from the same poster have been merged together into one post] Question 1: Me and my girlfriend recently broke up a week ago after being together for 3 years. We do have a daughter together. Since we broke up, all I ha...
A. 21 October 2009: Why would you even consider getting back together with a game player? Just so you can get hurt again? Dude...MAN UP!... (read in full...)
How do I break it to my boyfriend that I'm in love with my best friend?
Q. How do I break it to my boyfriend that I am in love with my best (guy) friend? Background info: I met my boyfriend and best friend around the same time (2005-2006ish). I met my boyfriend on vacation in another country. I have family who live ...
A. 21 October 2009: How about being honest with your Boyfriend? And be thoughtful about it. He did nothing wrong, but it will make him lose a lot of confidence in any future relationships he has if you don't be honest with him now. remember this is your problem, not ... (read in full...)
She has lied the whole time, should I still be with her?
Q. Hello. Just wondering if I could get some advice please. I met a woman on a dating site and she told me she has not had sex with anyone for over 6 years. She told me she did not bother due to being cheated on in a previouse relationship. I t...
A. 21 October 2009: NO!
Just read this...that is all you need to know
When considering a relationship of any kind, practice the Rule of Threes regarding the claims and promises a person makes, and the responsibilities he or she has. One lie, one broken prom... (read in full...)
I want this to work since I can't prove he cheated. Any ideas on getting my confidence in him back?
Q. I have been in a relationship with this man for over 3 years now, I'm very committed to this relationship. I've had a hidden fear that he's cheated on me since sometime in our second year together because our sex life drastically changed. Then last ...
A. 21 October 2009: Uh I only had to get as far as the "A freind of his cousin's and they pretended to be gay".
That is a dead giveaway.
You are in denial, young lady. He is a cheater. We are all in consensus(which is rare).
Look, I know that when dealing w... (read in full...)
How can I make her understand that I am not comfortable with her seeing her ex's?
Q. The other day my gf of 4 years (we have known each other well for 9 years) went to see an ex of hers for coffee at his place. She omitted to mention it at the time and it came up in conversation last night. This ex was someone she had and ...
A. 21 October 2009: Yes, it sure seems like she is wanting to control you. All this "can't tell her you love her" stuff is a justification on her part to make herself feel it's ok to carry on with these men. Frankly I am very sorry for your predicament. I think you... (read in full...)
How can I make her understand that I am not comfortable with her seeing her ex's?
Q. The other day my gf of 4 years (we have known each other well for 9 years) went to see an ex of hers for coffee at his place. She omitted to mention it at the time and it came up in conversation last night. This ex was someone she had and ...
A. 21 October 2009: Yeah I have some advice for you. She is placing all this "You are jealous and posessive" stuff and telling him about it because she is full of crap. People in committed relationships do not spend time alone at Exes houses and then omit tellin... (read in full...)
Questions about my ex: Does she still have feelings for me and why am I so bothered by the idea of her having sex with her new boyfriend?
Q. [Moderator's Note: 2 Questions from the same poster have been merged together into one post] Question 1: Me and my girlfriend recently broke up a week ago after being together for 3 years. We do have a daughter together. Since we broke up, all I ha...
A. 21 October 2009: (Grimmreality Scratches Head)... Hmmmm.....Savai, Lets take a look at this. You say that your GF and yourself have been broken up for around a week. also that your GF is already dating somebody within 5 days?. And that she claims its... (read in full...)
My girlfriend had a one night stand with a professional athelte before we met.
Q. My girlfriend recently told me that a few months before we met she had a one night stand with a famous professional ball player. She wanted to be open and I think that is a great thing. We have a great relationship, we are madly in love and its ...
A. 21 October 2009: I have to agree with Satin here.
Why she even told you this is beyond me though. I mean there is one thing to being open and honest(which I recommend), but that had nothing to do with your relationship. And by telling you, she knew she had to r... (read in full...)
Girlfriend lied about unprotected sex with other guys, now I'm worried I have an STD
Q. Heyy, im 16 nearly 17 (male). Ive just broken up with my girlfriend and we were sexually active. We had sex a few times without a condom because she told me she hadnt had sex with anyone else. While I was going out with her I caught thrush, a...
A. 21 October 2009: Yes please get tested...but this begs another question...
What reasoning could you possibly use to equate having unprotected sex because some girl TOLD you she hadn't had sex with anyone else?
Did she tell you she was a virgin? If thats the cas... (read in full...)
Did he cheat because he doesn't believe I won't hurt him?
Q. My boyfriend and I have been going out since May 2nd. I had a feeling 2 months ago he had an affair. so one night we were laying in bed and I asked him if he had ever had sex with her. he said no way not with all those stretch marks and flab. I ...
A. 21 October 2009: OMG....
This guy is cheating on you big time. If you keep giving him these chances, you might as well get DOORMAT placed on your head, because he is walking all over you.
Please get rid of this bum. He is a liar and a loser... (read in full...)
My wife is in love with another woman. What now?
Q. I need some advise! I've been with my wife for 20years married for 16. Right now she is involved in a relationship with another women for over a year, I've known about this from day one, It was orginally gonna be the three of us and it was, but now ...
A. 21 October 2009: The ultimatum was good.
BUT...
You invited disaster even allowing this woman into your life. By allowing this to go on you sealed your own fate.
So now she will either accept it or won't.... (read in full...)
Am I totally out of line here? Uncomfortable about a text my girlfriend received.
Q. well it started bad in the first place because i looked on my gf phone at a message that a male friend of hers sent to her. the message said and it was forwarded to her ....you and i do it in the bedroom.we do it in the livingroom we do it all over ...
A. 21 October 2009: Practice this rule with your GF my friend...you can never go wrong with it.
When considering a relationship of any kind, practice the Rule of Threes regarding the claims and promises a person makes, and the responsibilities he or she has. One... (read in full...)
What to expect with a threesome?
Q. Dear Agony Aunts, I'm planning on a having a threesome with two men this weekend. I'm really nervous and I don't know what to expect. What should I expect when I have this kind of threesome?...
A. 20 October 2009: You better make sure that you are comfortable with both men. And that they are comfortable with each other as well as with you.
Sadly things like this tend to spill over(no pun intended) into a macho match between two guys. And if you are curr... (read in full...)
Is it ok to feel this way or am I crossing the line?
Q. My husband's brother is literally the nicest guy I have ever met. He's is genuinely sweet and nice to me when no one else is. I have never in my life been treated so well by someone, not by any friends not by and family members. I've never had a ...
A. 20 October 2009: Oh there is no misunderstanding at all. If you are the original poster and claiming that their is, I once again suggest you reread all of your post.
Your stomach drops as in "AWWW"
You want to talk to him because its your husband upsettin... (read in full...)
Is it ok to feel this way or am I crossing the line?
Q. My husband's brother is literally the nicest guy I have ever met. He's is genuinely sweet and nice to me when no one else is. I have never in my life been treated so well by someone, not by any friends not by and family members. I've never had a ...
A. 20 October 2009: Young lady,
The fact that you are asking this question at this forum is answering your own question.
Yes you are pushing the envelope. I suggest you rethink this because its innocent things like this that end up being a movie of the week with... (read in full...)
Will this LDR work out?
Q. I'm having a terrible time in my LDR. I "met" a woman a few months ago through on online dating service. When she started her account and up until about two weeks before we contacted, she lived only 40 miles from me. After moving (again, a couple of ...
A. 20 October 2009: Ok,
I will tell you straight out that as much as you probably do not want to hear this, Long distance Relationships rarely if ever work.
They take constant communication and trust, neither of which is present in this relationship.
A... (read in full...)
When will this explode?
Q. My wife is actively searching for a new exciting relationship with men, so she said to me. She denies looking for sex or having ever cheated in the past. I honestly believe she has not cheated. She is a sexy young women who attracts alot of ...
A. 19 October 2009: WHAT'S THERE TO UNDERSTAND OR LISTEN TOO?
Timer for some reality here, Johnny
Uh...I think its a foregone conclusion that she has checked out on the marriage. If she is telling you this, she is bracing you for the day when some guy comes ... (read in full...)
If a friend asked you to follow their woman for them would you?
Q. would you stalk someones partner/ex partner for them for money?If it was a friend or relative would you stalk them for free?Would you stalk a complete stranger for someone for money-would you stalk someone for fun-I need to know what percentage of ...
A. 19 October 2009: No poster I was not being sarcastic at all.
In this case I really suggest that you contact the authorities. When there has been physical abuse especially. Regardless of the circumstances and given this physical past I would be very careful.... (read in full...)
If a friend asked you to follow their woman for them would you?
Q. would you stalk someones partner/ex partner for them for money?If it was a friend or relative would you stalk them for free?Would you stalk a complete stranger for someone for money-would you stalk someone for fun-I need to know what percentage of ...
A. 19 October 2009: Well thank god thats cleared up...So you arent a troll. Now that has been established, please give us some background so we can help you.
What initiated the surveillance, if you can point to any incidents?
Has your ex been insanely jealous, or ... (read in full...)
My boyfriend has a rather strong musk coming from his private area.
Q. My boyfriend has a rather strong musk coming from his private area. It is quite potent. I have tried to get used to it but its just...really strong (as I have said before). Is there anything I can do to mask the smell? Will cologne help? Is it wise ...
A. 19 October 2009: Maybe he should change soaps. Many times men's junk responds differently to different soaps. I sure as hell am not using Lifeboy or Lava with Pumice down there unless I want to look like my crotch jumped into a french fryer
I mean listen, why dont... (read in full...)
She doesn't remember what she did when drunk - or does she?
Q. I moved into a new flat a few months with two girls who were friends of my friend. i got a crush on one of the girls and then a month ago me, her and one of our friends got drunk and kissed her and touched her boobs but we couldn't do much. ...
A. 19 October 2009: Waga-Waga,
Come on now, you have already begun the awkwardness in the flat.
I mean come on, there is only a trainwreck of bad feelings that are going to come out of this.
So if you begin dating her, just wait....
Wait until she g... (read in full...)
If a friend asked you to follow their woman for them would you?
Q. would you stalk someones partner/ex partner for them for money?If it was a friend or relative would you stalk them for free?Would you stalk a complete stranger for someone for money-would you stalk someone for fun-I need to know what percentage of ...
A. 19 October 2009: TROLL POST!... (read in full...)
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