| Latest articles: Just Two
This question has 3 answers by readers of DearCupid.ORG.
Newest answer was posted
31 March 2011: I recently read something nice that I would like to share.... JUST TWO. Donate blood twice a year. Donate your eyes after death. Thank God twice a day. Write two letters a week. Visit two ailing people a month. Say two words of gratitude-"...
A little humility goes a long way
This question has 7 answers by readers of DearCupid.ORG.
Newest answer was posted
27 March 2011: I’ve been a moderator here on DC for a while and it’s a great forum. It really irritates me though when the OP shows no regard for the aunts who’ve taken time to answer questions. We moderators don’t know you, yet we spend time poring over ever...
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Are they turned off by my virginity?
Q. I loved two different guys once upon a time... The first guy was into me, we had alot in common. We went on a couple dates and we discussed sex, marriage etc. When he found out I was a virgin tho , he said he couldnt be with me anymore.. The...
A. 12 April 2016: You're just going for the wrong men OP. A decent guy would never be turned off by a virgin...heck that's what they want! Don't you see so many posts here from people who say they cant deal with their partner's past, even if they've been with one ... (read in full...)
He wants to move close to his baby mother! Am I overreacting?
Q. During a conversation with my boyfriend of 2 years, we were discussing areas of our city where we would like to live together. (We currently reside our parents) I told him that I wanted to live in a more central area where condos were being built ...
A. 11 April 2016: I'm with Honeypie...this doesn't seem like the right guy for you.
Your boyfriend is either totally spineless or still harbors feelings for this woman. Why else would he continue to pay for his ex who wasn't even his wife?
There's nothi... (read in full...)
Do you think my boyfriend should help me out with money for this vacation?
Q. My boyfriend and I have been dating about 2 years. We both want to go on vacation in a month or so (our first trip together). He makes about 4x the amount of money I make. So you can imagine that he is not concerned about money on vacation for ...
A. 10 April 2016: If the vacation is a financial burden to you, then I think you shouldn't go, irrespective of whether or not your BF offers to pay. You're not married to him, you're his girlfriend...not his wife. There's a big difference. Are you fine with taking ... (read in full...)
He promised he'd pay, and we really do need the money
Q. My best friends fiance was organising a surprise party for her 30th and he asked if me and my husband would be happy to have it at our house as theirs was too small to fit approximately 30 people. He assured is he would buy everything-snack...
A. 10 April 2016: Time to tell your friend. Tell her whatever you've told us here and spare no details. This guy is really cheap and needs to be exposed.
My husband's friend did something like this a while back and ultimately my husband had to tell the friend's... (read in full...)
Is he saying these things because he’s genuine? Or to get laid? How do I find out?
Q. Dear Cupid I met a guy in dating site, we are dating each other for couple of weeks and we went exclusive. He is not handsome, but I kind of like the way he carries himself and talks. So I like him, he is younger than me and he never dat...
A. 9 April 2016: Two weeks and you're already spreading your legs for him? What do you expect? And what do you think will he think of you?
Of course he's saying all those things to get laid! Its not rocket science! He knows you're already allowing oral sex...it... (read in full...)
Should I tell her that her boyfriend has been cheating on her, without me ever knowing until now?
Q. I met this guy named "A" in the fall of 2013 (he then 24). I had issues because I recently had gotten out of a relationship and he suddenly came along. We talked about my break up and got to know each other. He would call me day/night daily....
A. 7 April 2016: Look, if you ask me, you shouldn't tell the girl anything. Just quietly back out with your dignity intact and chalk it up as a lesson learned the hard way.
He didn't force you to have sex with him; you took your own decision. In fact, you slep... (read in full...)
I suspect my boyfriend fancies his friend's fiance
Q. Somehow, I keep getting this feeling that my boyfriend has a crush on his best friend's fiance. My boyfriend constantly bickers with his best friend's fiance. When I listen and watch them bicker back and forth, I feel it ressembles an old married ...
A. 6 April 2016: On a side note, he's probably told you that he dislikes her because he knows that you do, and he doesn't want to get into any kind of trouble with you. The safest thing is to take your side, so just say "oh I can't stand her".
If this girl is ... (read in full...)
I suspect my boyfriend fancies his friend's fiance
Q. Somehow, I keep getting this feeling that my boyfriend has a crush on his best friend's fiance. My boyfriend constantly bickers with his best friend's fiance. When I listen and watch them bicker back and forth, I feel it ressembles an old married ...
A. 6 April 2016: I don't think he dislikes her because if he did then all of you wouldn't hang out as much as you did. He probably has some kind of comfort level with her which you're mistaking as a crush. My guess is that he's known her longer than he's known you ... (read in full...)
Am I potentially getting myself tangled in something too big for me to handle?
Q. I met a guy online about a month ago. After our 2nd date he started telling me some really personal stuff about himself. I got a run down of all the problems he has ever had in his life including an 8 year relationship that ended badly and his suff...
A. 4 April 2016: You don't have to feel heartless because you've barely had 3 days with him and even if it was more, you don't owe him anything at all.
You are not his therapist. You're not his parent, his partner or even his friend. You don't have to sympathi... (read in full...)
Should I end this relationship? It hurts me to end something that has so much potential and beauty to grow
Q. Hi guys, I'm in a dilemma. I come from a very traditional Pakistani family but born and raised in the states. I grew up wanting a Pakistani guy who looks like me and has similar values and upbringing because it's so complex and detailed. An...
A. 3 April 2016: I think that it basically boils down to the colour of his skin and no matter how much to try to beat around the bush, the fact is that, you are ashamed of being being with him because she's black. You mentioned in the very first paragraph that you ... (read in full...)
Were we wrong to offer? Why did she not tell her husband about the invitation and the arrangements to attend the wedding?
Q. My aunt and I have always been close- she is 12 years older than me so more like a big sister than an aunt. A few years ago she moved to America with her husband and son due to her husband's job. Of course I missed her and we kept in touch and I w...
A. 29 March 2016: Maybe she's fine with taking small hand-outs from the family but a fully paid round trip for a family of three is certainly huge and they would be in your debt forever.
I guess she felt bad for not being able to afford the trip herself as well ... (read in full...)
This new guy is generally nice but very strange at times
Q. help!! This new guy that i am seeing is generally a nice sweet guy, but he is weird in a way that he denies when i ask him not to do anything or change, basically everything. For example, he has a habit early in a morning create a horrend...
A. 28 March 2016: He sounds terrible. He's rude, insolent, arrogant and doesn't give a damn about what you think or feel.
Dump him please.... (read in full...)
I cant deal with my boyfriends irresponsibility
Q. hi, i need an advice regarding a bad situation between my bf and i. we are together for 2 years. in february he was in a car accident and needed some financial help to cover the expenses. i didnt have any cash at that moment but my $1000.00 credit ...
A. 27 March 2016: My god is this guy for real? How on earth have you put up with him for so long? Look, ask for your money back and just dump him immediately. Just demand for what is your right, ask him to return the so-called expensive earrings and make sure he pays ... (read in full...)
He seems flaky. Is he not that interested or just bad at keeping plans?
Q. I met this guy through a mutual friend 2 weeks ago.The first time we arranged to meet up, he flaked on our plans. Basically, we arranged to meet up after 6 pm when he gets off work.I texted him earlier that day and said "hey" but he didn't respond. ...
A. 27 March 2016: It's not that he's bad at keeping plans or anything. He's just rude and is not that interested in you and is keeping you hanging.
Yes, lose the number and don't entertain him again, even if he pretends to apologize. This guy is certainly not wort... (read in full...)
Now that I've started dating again I find myself having dreams about my ex! Does this mean I'm not over him?
Q. My ex-boyfriend and I dated for one year and broke up three months ago. He was an amazing partner and a wonderful person. He was always attentive towards me and I treasured him. We were in love, however later realized that our opposite personalities ...
A. 26 March 2016: I think you're feeling this way because you have good memories of your ex. You didn't have a nasty break-up; you parted ways because you just realized that things wouldn't work out and you moved on. I think this is the reason you dream about him ... (read in full...)
Dumped by a cowardly text!
Q. Hi I am hoping for some guidance with something that has happened to me this week. My boyfriend of a year dumped me by text. It was literally a line saying lets call it a day, following a couple of harsh texts between us. Ironically, I act...
A. 26 March 2016: No OP, he's not hurting; he's the one who chose to end it that too in such a hurried manner via a text message.
I have a feeling there's someone else in his life and he did the easiest thing... Dumped you without even so much as a last conversa... (read in full...)
He wants my help obtaining a British passport renewal
Q. Hey Aunts, There is a guy I've been talking to on for 5 months. We get along quite well and he plans to come to our country for a visit this summer (his is part nationality here). We like each other, just not in-love and we talk on a variety of ...
A. 21 March 2016: You've been given the right advice and I second whatever everyone's told you. This whole thing reeks of a scam. Just walk away, don't do any of the things that he's asked you to do and just completely block him from your life. He can get his ... (read in full...)
When people say they are ''not ready for a relationship'' is that just a line to discourage the other party?
Q. I was seeing a 25 y.o. woman over a month ago. She just lost her mother due to very complicated circumstances so she went through a very hard time. I took the 'not ready for a relationship' line as sincere. I didnt pursue but was open to go on mo...
A. 21 March 2016: Well technically she didn't lie. She wasn't ready for a relationship...with you. She just didn't say that.
Yes it's a line for letting people down easy. Don't take it personally. She was just better suited for the other guy. Move on and don't le... (read in full...)
Would it be a bad idea to text him? There was no formal goodbye to our relationship
Q. I dated someone for a month, which ended two months ago. There was no formal goodbye. The communication just faded on his end. I never reached out again but I find myself thinking about him all the time. I was very attracted to him physical...
A. 18 March 2016: I wouldn't.
He's already shown that he's not interested because if he was, the conversation wouldnt have faded at his end and he would have made an attempt to revive it if he wanted. He didnt and that's indication enough of his disinter... (read in full...)
How important is appreciation in the first couple dates?
Q. Just wondering... I'm sure it's important, but I wonder to what extent. I'm not the kind of person who says thank you for every little thing... I'm not sure why. I had an ex after dating for a few years tell me I didn't really say thank you when h...
A. 11 March 2016: Why don't you say it? If you know that this is a problem then what's stopping you from being appreciative? If it's there in your head then why not be graceful and say it out loud? ... (read in full...)
I'm worried about my ex she has contacted me out of the blue and I don't wish to have anything to do with her
Q. Hello everyone. How are you all? Okay, so I'm not sure how this goes? First time here. I really need some advice. I, like many others had everything. Cutting a long story short. I lost it all. I got involved with a lady I should never ...
A. 11 March 2016: I agree. Just block her, make all your settings private and that way she can't see what your friends have "liked". There are ways to do that and absolutely nothing will show on your page to someone who's not your friend. I also suggest that you ... (read in full...)
Has anyone else's husband said to his wife that she will be a burden on a business trip?
Q. My husband goes on some business trips during the year, but usually in the state we live in. Sometimes, I am able to go with him and he has been okay with that and he enjoys me going along. He will be going on a new business trip on the coa...
A. 10 March 2016: Mine wont go *unless* I go with him! When he cancelled two conferences and pouted like a child when I told him that I didn't want to go for the third one either, I gave in and now I'll be joining him on a 3-day business trip. ... (read in full...)
I think my girlfriend cheated in a threesome but won't admit it
Q. I am pondering a situation that occurred with my girlfriend after had been living together for just over a year. The evidence points to the possibility of her having a threesome with her best friend and her best friend’s boyfriend. It looks on th...
A. 9 March 2016: Ok here's my take on this.
Maybe she did. Maybe she didn't. But the question is, do you really think that reassurance from a bunch of strangers on the internet will save your relationship?
If you doubt her then I think it's pretty much doom... (read in full...)
Is it possible to live happily ever after knowing that my husband occasionally sleeps with other women on side?
Q. Is it possible to live happily ever after knowing that husband sleeps with other women on side occasionally(paid sex with high end escort/companions)? He always use protection and is very hygienic. I've got him n myself tested few yrs ago when I i...
A. 7 March 2016: The "perfect husband and father" has no love, regard or respect for his wife, his children, his marital vows or his value system.
I personally don't think you can be at peace knowing this but then, to each his own. I wouldn't tolerate this non... (read in full...)
Is 4 months of dating too soon to ask her to marry me?
Q. I am in love with my girlfriend.. I can't imagine life without her. She is everything I could have ever asked for and more. We have only been dating 4 months but it seems like longer. We have known each other for 4 years. I know she is the girl for ...
A. 4 March 2016: There are no rules when it comes to love and life...make your own rules, stick to them and hope to goodness that everything works out!
If you feel that she's the "one", then by all means go for it. My now husband asked me to marry him less tha... (read in full...)
He gave me loads of different reasons for our out of the blue breakup, and I want him back.
Q. There is this guy in my group of friends that I ended up dating for nearly two months. He had liked me for a bit before finally working up the courage (apparently with alcohol) to text me. We talked almost everyday but never really in person. He ...
A. 3 March 2016: I honestly don't understand why you would want to be with someone who's told you point blank that they don't want to be with you.
Maybe for whatever reason he felt that it didn't click with you and wanted out. Maybe there's someone else on the s... (read in full...)
How do I make this threesome idea happen?
Q. I want have a threesome with my wife and friend. the game plan is they should not know each other so I want to blind fold them and to convince them for this and then the game goes on.... suggest me how to make this wonderful...!?...
A. 3 March 2016: What an absolutely ghastly idea! Please don't do it. Of course there are 2 options here: either you're a troll or someone so absurd that you'll do it anyway. Come back when you're looking for ways to save your marriage... (read in full...)
I'd been seeing a co-worker who does have a girlfriend and now he's blocked me, is blanking me and has told everyone at work everything! How do I approach this situation?
Q. I have been seeing this guy from work since Mid December (I know it's risky and a 'no go' with colleagues from work, but there's something about him I like, and he admitted he likes me too, and when we were out on our Christmas Night Out we ended up ...
A. 2 March 2016: He was the cheater, not you! If anything, he is he one who should be feeling shitty about this entire episode. However, as an aunt here said, you knew he wasn't a very nice person from the word go so don't expect him to be good to you now. When he ... (read in full...)
Boyfriend wants to continue being friends with her but it upsets me
Q. I'm looking for pretty open minded advice here so bare with me lol. My boyfriend and I were together for about 4 years. We had a great relationship but towards the end we had some difficulties outside of our relationship that we couldn't really ...
A. 1 March 2016: I think this is one of those times when you've won the battle but lost the war. You have the love of your life and you're back together after all the upheaval but at what cost? Remember, this is a woman who he first had an emotional affair with and ... (read in full...)
A is a long term good friend. How can I convince my mum to let A spend the night?
Q. So, here's the deal. I have a good friend, let's call him A. Anyway, ever since I was little, I've always preferred hanging out with boys. But now that I'm older, I can't have a sleepover or anything. I wouldn't want to do anything sexual, and ...
A. 26 February 2016: The short answer- you can't.
It's a bad idea, no sensible mother would agree to it and it's not as safe and easy as it looks to you. Why would you want him to stay over at night to watch a movie? Watch a movie in the daytime! Whatever else you... (read in full...)
What are my options? I can't tell my gf because I don't want to break up with her
Q. Hi, so I’m in love with girl that I’ve been with for 4 years, were 20 years old and we’ve been living together in our own flat for the last two years. She’s an orphan and has little contact with her family and does not have a lot of friends. She’s ...
A. 23 February 2016: You're both too young to be making adult decisions for life...you're just 20 years old for heaven's sake! Call me a prude but I think that living together at 20 is really too soon.
Anyway, I've been suffering from migraines for a long, LONG tim... (read in full...)
My future MIL thinks we should get checked out because after 3 years together we still haven't gotten pregnant
Q. Me and my boyfriend have been together 5 years now we are getting married this year... We have had unprotected sex for at least 3 years. If we get pregnant that great if we don’t that is still okay as we are 25 and 26 so there’s time. But his ...
A. 18 February 2016: If you don't want to, then don't.
She cant push you into it obviously; she's just offering her suggestion. If you think there's no hurry then just tell her so politely and ask your boyfriend to talk to his mother about her intrusion into your per... (read in full...)
Is it love or just habit? Can a husband truly love his wife if he cheats for years?
Q. Can a man cheating on his wife for four plus years really love her? Even if he was straying because of sex- something that he is not getting in his marriage? He doesn't love the other woman- don't know if he cares for her or just using her for ...
A. 17 February 2016: Your husband is cheating on you and sugar-coat it all you want under as many layers of fancy wrapping paper, the truth is that he is committing adultery and is, under no circumstances, reasons or excuses, to be trusted, given a chance or forgiven. ... (read in full...)
Is it possible to mess up your chances with the right guy?
Q. MOD NOTE: This has been submitted in a very similar way the other day... recently went on a first date with a guy that is seems so awesome. He's funny, sweet, handsome and fun. I think he had a great time with me and even texted me after the...
A. 13 February 2016: OK we all know you asked this question already and you got some really great answers. However, if you're still not convinced, here's another try.
No you did not blow your chances with this guy. If you're thinking that you made a mistake by telli... (read in full...)
Why do I remain unattached? Why can't I find a guy interested in a long term commitment with me?
Q. Emotional dependency issue. I have been single now for four years and I can't quite pin point the issue. I like to think I have a wonderful life, great career, ambition, attractive, my own place, finishing a Master's Degree, blah blah blah. Regar...
A. 12 February 2016: Maybe you're just not meeting the right people and as you yourself said, you're sabotaging by own happiness by seeking out people who'll hurt you. The rejection by your parents has resulted in you subconsciously attempting to alienate yourself from ... (read in full...)
Confused, and flirting with another guy. What should I consider?
Q. Hello, I am mortified that I even have to ask this but I really really need some help. I have been going out with a guy for 5 months now and as much as I hate to admit it I'm not physically attracted to him but his personality is amazing, he is so...
A. 11 February 2016: A history with drugs and alcohol? Hurts himself when you fight? OP you run for the hills this instant and don't ever look back. You are in for a whole lot of trouble if you stay with this guy.
You're not his mom. You're not his therapis... (read in full...)
Guy touched butt on 1st date. Will he not call me again because of how I reacted?
Q. I went on a first date with a guy on Saturday. He was nice but he touched my butt.Not grabbed, but knowingly touched it. Aafter we kissed, he tapped it. Not slapped it but tapped it with his hand. Nervously, i didn't know how to react and didnt ...
A. 11 February 2016: No guy with the right ideas would touch someone's butt after just one date unless sex was all they're after. If his intentions were honorable then he wouldn't have dared to take these liberties with you. I think he just said that he wasn't after a ... (read in full...)
How does he get away with cheating and then get the perfect girl and relationship and I'm left looking like the big bad wolf.
Q. I'm probably going to get a lot of hate over this but this is why I'm writing, for help and advice. Around 19 months ago I had an affair with a guy 11 years younger than myself who was in a relationship with an extremely beautiful girl a...
A. 11 February 2016: Jealousy is a funny thing OP, it makes you do things that you never thought you were capable of doing or feeling...but you do still do it because you have no control over yourself.
Its normal to be jealous of someone who we think is better t... (read in full...)
What is crossing the boundary between an attached guy and his female friend? Please enlighten me!
Q. Recently, a female friend called my boyfriend about a personal issue. She was talking about a guy whom she slept with and did not want to pursue anything beyond FWB with her. They used to be colleagues, but by the time this call took place, they ...
A. 10 February 2016: If you ask me, yes its crossing a line. In fact, its crossing two lines, in this case.
One, your boyfriend isn't a close friend of hers and personal information especially about sex and bedroom problems shouldn't be shared with just about an... (read in full...)
I'm married so why am I having an affair with a co-worker?
Q. I put myself in a very difficult situation and don't know where to go from here. Recently I had an affair with a coworker.I'm a married woman and feel horrible about it. I wasn't planning on it, believe me. When I look back, I realize that we both ...
A. 9 February 2016: What do you mean, "marriage aside"?!! Are you out of your mind? You should be asking us what you should do to get your marriage back on track and not brushing it aside and asking us what the deal with your lover is.
Here's the hard truth. You are ... (read in full...)
Do I keep snooping around? I think my husband is up to something but he's denying it all
Q. Hi, Please can I get some advice, I think my husband is up to something... Several weeks ago my husband had an issue with his car so it had to be in the dealership workshop for 9 days and they were unable to give him a loan car. I gave him ...
A. 8 February 2016: I'm really surprised that after 17 years together, you cant even talk to your husband about something as simple as this! Where's the communication in the marriage? Why the need to snoop around and why do you even think that you'll catch him red ... (read in full...)
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