| Latest articles: Just Two
This question has 3 answers by readers of DearCupid.ORG.
Newest answer was posted
31 March 2011: I recently read something nice that I would like to share.... JUST TWO. Donate blood twice a year. Donate your eyes after death. Thank God twice a day. Write two letters a week. Visit two ailing people a month. Say two words of gratitude-"...
A little humility goes a long way
This question has 7 answers by readers of DearCupid.ORG.
Newest answer was posted
27 March 2011: I’ve been a moderator here on DC for a while and it’s a great forum. It really irritates me though when the OP shows no regard for the aunts who’ve taken time to answer questions. We moderators don’t know you, yet we spend time poring over ever...
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Do I get back with my ex? My current g/f is away for six months!
Q. I had a bad break up with my ex 5 years back we were dating 6 years. She had my baby and gave me a choice my new girlfriend or her and the baby. I chose my girlfriend. 5 years have past and now my ex is sending me pics of my child telling me all ...
A. 26 August 2015: Wow...just WOW! You don't give a toss that you haven't seen your child in 5 years but just because your current girlfriend is away, you're considering going back to the ex, NOT for the baby but because you're not getting sex!
You obviousl... (read in full...)
I've been in search of the right girl for years but haven't found her. What should I do?
Q. I am looking for a younger girl to start a family with. I am in my mid thirties but rarely feel any chemistry with girls this age. Nor do I feel that it would be wise for a girl of 34 to start having children. I am an artist and a musician. Ive ...
A. 25 August 2015: Your post sounds like an advertisement in a matrimonial column!
You might want an ideal type but its very unlikely that you'll get all that you want because it doesn't happen like that!
Don't you know anyone from the piano fraternity who c... (read in full...)
Am I overreacting or am I right to feel there’s something off about this new relationship?
Q. So, I've been seeing this guy for about three months. We met online through Eharmony and he's my first relationship since I broke up with my ex three years ago. The first month was great and I really felt like I'd found someone I really connecte...
A. 23 August 2015: OP basically I get the feeling that you're asking us to give you the go-ahead to break up with this guy.
Without even analyzing your post line by line, let me just ask you a simple question. You're 29 years old. This is the time that most peo... (read in full...)
Should I give up my virginity as well be a FWB to a married man?
Q. I am a mid-20's non-religious virgin. There is no such thing as a romantic history for me, unless you count two short-term relationships. Both had ceased due to intimidation towards my career. STEM-related. No, I have never been in love. I r...
A. 22 August 2015: So he gets sex for the rest of his work assignment period. What do you get out of it? He goes back to his wife after its all done while you'll be alone, hurting from being used no matter how rational you try to be and even more cynical than you are ... (read in full...)
Should I be dating a man I work with?
Q. I started a new job 3 months ago and started getting close to one of the managers who also works with me. He was very forward with me and i knew that he was attracted to me. At first i wasn't too interested in him as he isn't my usual type but the ...
A. 22 August 2015: No no no no no! Please don't make the mistake that I once committed...and how I had to pay for it! To make a long story short, don't eat where you shit. Keep work and your personal life as far away from each other as possible. No matter how ... (read in full...)
Should I get breast implants because my boyfriend wants me to?
Q. My boyfriend wants me to get breast implants, and I don't know how I feel about it. I am naturally very flat chested, an A cup. I've never really liked having small breasts but as I've gotten older I've learned to accept it. My boyfriend wa...
A. 21 August 2015: Haha...That's perfect Aunt CindyCares! I love what she said. Suggest that he get a penis enlargement. Only then will you have a breast enlargement and tell him that that way you get a couples discount :)... (read in full...)
I want to tell my fiance about my indiscretion, I just don't know how to do it
Q. I am engaged to my lovely fiance for two years. He is everything I could possibly want and more. I love him so much, but, I almost ruined everything. I kissed another man on a night out while my fiance was on business. From my vague memory it ...
A. 21 August 2015: Believe me, don't utter a word about this. Tell me, rationally, how is this going to make your relationship better? Is it going to make your partner love you more? Is it going to strengthen your bond? Is it going to have him trust you more? No, no ... (read in full...)
We broke up, working on being together but she changed all her passwords and while away she hasn't been making much contact. What's up?
Q. I have been with my lady for over 5 years. We moved together from NJ to maryland about 4 years ago. She was working at front desk at a major hotel chain. She was offered a Assistant General Managers position, so she took it and we moved in ...
A. 21 August 2015: To be honest, you don't seem right for each other at all, in any way. She's a go-getter, a determined hard worker, a take-charge lady. You, on the other hand, are laid-back, "a negative person" by your own admission, ambition-less as compared to her ... (read in full...)
My girlfriend sat naked in front of guys we just met.
Q. My girlfriend and I recently went to a lakehouse with one of her friends. Her friend brought her boyfriend and 2 of his guy friends. We had only met the boyfriend for lunch once and had never met the other two. We stayed there together for 2 ...
A. 18 August 2015: "she told the guy to dare her to get naked". So basically she WANTED to get naked for strangers. She did exactly that then went back for more.
What does this tell you about her?
I'm really surprised you're asking if you should be worried; you ... (read in full...)
I broke up my marriage via text, how to pick up the pieces and what to do from here?
Q. I just ended our marriage over the stupidest of things. I was out all day celebrating my moms birthday with my second son. I camme home at 730 to find my dh w a friend over, our kids dirty from playing outside, not bathed or fed dinner and a mess in ...
A. 17 August 2015: You didn't break up the marriage; you just gave a piece of your mind to a very aggravating husband and the reason he's playing it cool is because he knows that there's no point talking to you right now. It'll just escalate tempers. Don't you just ... (read in full...)
I hate these pictures!
Q. Hi, I know this may sound silly but I'm really upset.... I got married a few months ago and recently got back my professional photo album and dvd. I was reluctant to have a photographer as I hate pictures of myself as I know I'm not photoge...
A. 16 August 2015: Oh honey...don't fret over this! I know it's easier said than done but look at the bigger picture (pun not intended!) instead. You got married in March and you're still fretting about in in August? You poor thing! Just put this behind you, don't ... (read in full...)
Does he have a problem with my sexuality?
Q. Does my boyfriend have a problem with my sexuality? I think he might be jealous of my past encounters, he hasn't had many sexual experiences himself, and is insecure about sex and his own performance. We've had many arguments about sex before...
A. 14 August 2015: Yes he feels inferior and insecure because you've had more sexual experience than him. Plus the fact that you're bisexual threatens him at some level. I think couples therapy might be good for you two. Neither of you want to give up, he's just ... (read in full...)
His preference for 50:50 on everything is making me feel more like a mate, than really special to him. Is my concern justified?
Q. I have been dating my bf 2 months officially. The first month he was paying for almost everything and I felt like a real lady. Now things have started to be split 50:50. He recently invited me on function with his mates and the cost was $150 pe...
A. 14 August 2015: The problem stems with the fact that you need a man to pay for you so that you feel like a lady. Sadly, you are in for a big shock if you don't change the way you think. What on earth makes you feel that its a man's job to pay for a woman, that too ... (read in full...)
Why do my boyfriend's parents care so much about my educational background?
Q. I am a 22 year old woman in a relationship with a 24 year old man. We love each other but are complete opposites when it comes to educational background. I did not go to college, while he has a masters degree. His parents both have doctoral de...
A. 14 August 2015: I have a PhD and realize the value of education. That being said, I would never look down upon someone who hasn't had college education because what matters at the end of the day is what one has achieved by their hard work and not the number of ... (read in full...)
Boyfriend is so insecure he is constantly accusing me of cheating and I haven't!
Q. I have a major problem. My boyfriend is 4 years younger than me (he just turned 20) and is SO insecure! I havent cheated on him yet from the very beginning he's accused me of it. He always says sorry when we fight about it, and that hes just ...
A. 12 August 2015: Wait what? He's checking your panties?! WHY??? This is one the most ridiculous things I've ever heard and not just on DC!
Sweetie this guy is seriously and I mean *seriously* insecure and spells nothing but trouble. Get out of this relation... (read in full...)
Could this man even know what true love is? Is he crazy?
Q. I know curiosity killed the cat however, I need to know if I am the only one that thinks my ex is nuts. To recap several yrs. my ex was in an abusive marriage for 14 yrs- the abuse was on both ends, she leaves him for another man and then he hooks ...
A. 11 August 2015: Wow...I feel like I need a pen and paper to keep a track of the number of affairs he had and all the moving in and out because I've lost count already!
This isn't normal OP; he defines love as a passionate force greater than himself which he gives... (read in full...)
Do other women not wear panties under their dresses?
Q. My boyfriend gave me a gift card to luluelemon and said to buy something we would both enjoy. I ended up with a tennis style dress that fits perfect on me, but it is supershort. He told me it looks amazing on me but I'm a little selfconscious with ...
A. 10 August 2015: I cant imagine not wearing a panty no matter what I'm wearing! I cant imagine how some people go without them but then I guess that's just me. I don't think I've ever not worn underpants!
Since you asked for our opinion, I'd say that if its too ... (read in full...)
Have my actions and behaviour been inappropriate or sufficient to bring on his jealous and possessive response?
Q. Hi all, my boyfriend finds it weird that I hang out with my male friends (I only have 3 male friends). He says he can get jealous. I don't hang out with my male friends one on one. It is always in a group of guys and girls and thus far the onl...
A. 7 August 2015: Something seems off here.
Why doesnt he want to meet them? From what you describe, you seem to have a perfectly normal and healthy relationship with your male friends. I see no reason for him to feel insecure. Its not that you are particul... (read in full...)
So what do you guys think? Am I playing with fire? Can I trust that he has changed?
Q. My bf and I have been together for a year and a half and we live together. Before me, he was a real stud. He slept with almost 200 women and even today is never short of women's attention. Any gf he had before he cheated on them. He admitted all ...
A. 6 August 2015: I don't know OP. On the one hand, once a cheater, always a cheater. On the other hand, why give someone a bad name and hang him when he hasn't given you any evidence of any wrong-doings on his part?
What does your gut feeling tell you about hi... (read in full...)
When my girlfriend and I have a fight I often go on FB and look up my ex. Why do I do this?
Q. I Broke up with my ex 5 years ago. (Together for one year) I was so in love with her ... she was exactly the type of girl I wanted except for she was a bitch to me and her very close knit family hated me. I tried really hard to fix things with her ...
A. 3 August 2015: You're being incredibly disrespectful to your girlfriend by your actions which are extremely immature. One thing's for sure though, you're not over the ex. She might have been a bitch and blah blah but the fact that you STILL look her up every time ... (read in full...)
Do I drift away? Or should I tell him that I don't want to keep talking with him?
Q. After a two year relationship with my ex (with one breakup then makeup between that), we ended our relationship a couple of months ago but have been talking to each other daily. Flirting, as well... Honestly, it was starting to make my feel unc...
A. 2 August 2015: My first thought on reading your post was, why are you still in frequent touch with him when you've broken up? What sense does that make? A break-up means that you're not interested in carrying on with the relationship and talking to him daily shows ... (read in full...)
Should I be concerned that my Bf is asking for ''space'' when it's all been going so well?
Q. My question: Should I be concerned about my boyfriend asking for space when everything has been going so well? Also, did I respond in a good way when he asked for space? Background information: I have been in a LDR for a few months with a ma...
A. 30 July 2015: Look, to be very honest I don't really understand what this confusion in him is all about. For me, love is the simplest thing in the world. If you love someone then you love them, plain and simple.
The fact that he says that he has a "head an... (read in full...)
I can be argumentative when provoked, but I know that I'm not a cruel person that deserves to be bullied. Am I being too sensitive about this?
Q. I have a group of friends who I consider myself very close to, which consists of 2 boys, 2 girls (including me). Both boys are culprits of teasing, but one especially, let's call him Jason, tends to go way overboard. Every time I say something, it's ...
A. 30 July 2015: You're right, he's bullying you because he knows its easy to rile you up. What do you do? You confront him calmly and tell him that you will not participate in a conversation with him till he learns to behave himself. Walk away. If all of you are ... (read in full...)
What can I do about my hunch that I should leave my great Gf?
Q. I've been with this girl for 5 months -known her for 8-. I was dubious of having a real relationship with her at first because I didn't feel as much for her as I did for other girls I've been in love with, but things just happened and here I am. ...
A. 30 July 2015: If you have to think so much then she's not the girl for you. I think it would be best to break up now than drag it along because you'll just end up hurting her more if you delay the inevitable. Its obvious that she's more into you than you are into ... (read in full...)
I miss my teacher, as a friend, from High School very much and it causes me great pain. Advice needed, please?
Q. I've been out of HS 15 yrs but I still miss my fav teacher terribly. She was the best. I have seen her a couple times since graduating. Most recently when I saw her this year, I was able to exchange cell numbers with her and get a nice picture...
A. 28 July 2015: OP I teach at a University and there are many students who seem to be very fond of me. I have never really been a "teacher" teacher...I always give my students the option of approaching me whenever they want, and feel free to discuss anything they ... (read in full...)
He's 30. Should I try to enjoy some fun with this guy or back off?
Q. So, I met this guy and feel like there was an attraction between is. Since then, we've been chatting on Facebook and I feel well probably do coffee or something at some point. I know I'm getting a little ahead, but I've been thinking if I sh...
A. 26 July 2015: If you seem to have a good chemistry then what's the harm in getting to know him better? You're not dating a guy to make your family and friends happy are you? You're dating them because they make you happy and if this guy makes you happy, then by ... (read in full...)
So...she has a boyfriend, will she ever choose me?
Q. Hi ladies and gentlemen. I've known this girl for about a year now. I liked her from afar initially, knowing she has a boyfriend. We hit it off real well and everything, and after some time feelings between us develop, so to say. This is all ...
A. 26 July 2015: You had sex with a woman when you knew she had a boyfriend. If she was serious about you, she would have broken up with the other dude. She didn't and that shows what you mean to her. Either she doesn't love you or she sees him as a better option ... (read in full...)
My wife is jealous of my new employee
Q. In April I hired a new female employee who is 10 years younger than I am. She wasn't my first choice, but my employer said I could not hire my first choice for some reasons they say they cannot disclose to me because of privacy. Ever since...
A. 22 July 2015: Your wife's reactions are certainly over the top. Has your wife ever met the woman at work? Don't at all suggest that all of you go out for lunch together because it could be the biggest debacle ever. Even if the woman ever even glanced in your ... (read in full...)
Am I over-reacting by considering breaking up with gf because she went to see male strippers?
Q. Hi. So, let's describe the events before asking the question. Because they are lenghty, I am starting with the TOO LONG:DIDN'T READ version TL:DR: She went to a strip show while I don't nor have I done the same. Am I over reacting that she wen...
A. 19 July 2015: Maybe the reason she took her younger daughter was because she thought it was harmless fun and she wanted to prove a point to whoever it is with that she has her peer-pressure issues with, presumably her female friends.
Look, this is somethin... (read in full...)
He flirts a lot and he has a Gf. We've been texting. How can I make things less awkward if we do sleep together?
Q. There's a new guy that started at my work he's 32 bearing in mind I'm 20 but I don't think the age matters because we're basically like the same people. But the problem is that he has a girlfriend and he have such good flirty banter and I'm star...
A. 18 July 2015: OK this is wrong on so many levels!
He has a girlfriend! How can this not bother you? And its incredibly judgmental of you to think that she's not too good looking and rather pompous of you to think that YOU are...because despite what you think, h... (read in full...)
If a husband finds out his wife lied about multiple sexual partners, how should he deal with it?
Q. If a husband who was virgin before marriage finds out his wife had multiple sexual partners and hook ups before marriage and lied about it, then how should the husband deal with it?...
A. 17 July 2015: While it's understandable to feel hurt and betrayed, once the cloud of anger wears off, think of it as something that happened in the past. Most people wouldn't start off a new relationship - and definitely not something that has the potential of ... (read in full...)
My husband of 5 years told me that he still loves his ex and she is always in the back of his mind. Should I encourage him to try and find her?
Q. I've answered a lot of questions on this site, and now it is my turn to ask for advice. I'm a woman in my mid forties who has been with my awesome, loving husband for almost 5 years. Our relationship is amazing, far and away the best of my life,...
A. 16 July 2015: I'm sure he brought it up in a moment of weakness OP. I once said something absolutely ridiculous like this to my fiance about a man who I once had a huge crush on but who now obviously means NOTHING to me. I don't even know why I said it, it was ... (read in full...)
Is it so difficult for a husband to give oral sex?
Q. Hello members, Im an Indian married for 14 years.. everything is perfect.. but my husband has never gone down on me. Ive asked him a million times.. done everything to get him for it. Im very beautiful and good at almost everything.. husband ...
A. 15 July 2015: Wait a minute.
You're cheating on your husband and yet your problem is that he doesn't go down on you? So basically you value oral sex more than fidelity.
... (read in full...)
Childless by choice: please stop judging us
Q. This morning, as usual, I was perusing the questions on Dearcupid, when I stumbled across a question from a woman regarding her feelings about not wanting a child. Although I gave a comprehensive answer to the question, it touched a nerve with me, ...
A. 13 July 2015: Your article really touched a chord with me, Aiden. This is an issue that I have personally been battling with ever since I was in my 20s' and solemn relatives would ask me when I intended to get married and have children. Now that I'm 32, my ... (read in full...)
How can I build up the strength to NOT go back to him? His behaviour has been inconsistent and confusing
Q. I need some help finding out how to move on from a terrible, emotionally abusive relationship which has destroyed me. I have been involved with a guy for around eight months. When we first got together, he told me he was kind of involved with so...
A. 13 July 2015: Wow... I dont even know where to start! And I dont know how I can even say everything that I want without appearing harsh but I'll try. First of all, I'm glad that you know that your self-esteem is absolute shit because that's the most glaring thi... (read in full...)
Can I get over this revelation? Three years ago, before I knew her, she gave a guy a bj.
Q. Okay so im 18 and have been with my girlfriend who is 19 for a year. I'm very happy with her, and still am, but recently found out that when she was barely 15, she gave a bj to a guy who she only got with 2 or 3 times, who she knew had a gf but d...
A. 12 July 2015: You do realize you're being utterly silly and ridiculous, right? What your gf did before meeting you is really none of your business! And if you're actually thinking of her as a slut just because of one action from her past, then you actually dont ... (read in full...)
Was he trying to make me jealous by grinding other women in front of me? Why didn't he respond to my remark?
Q. I was at a party and there was a guy who is interested in me.. maybe love me. I like him but not in the way that he does for me. He hasn't told me directly that he does and I never asked. However he wanted to dance with me and not in a good wa...
A. 12 July 2015: Oh OP...he doesn't love you or even have the slightest respect for you. Love isn't petty, its not about making the other person jealous, its not vain or selfish or calculated.
Its a good thing if you say you aren't interested in him. Why bother a... (read in full...)
If my bf really loves me why does he want me to have sex with other partners?
Q. I've been dating my bf since Jan 2015. I'm 18 and he's 35. Big age gap I know but love has no boundary. My family likes him and him and I know very well that we're each other's life partner. However I believe that because of his age he is too le...
A. 10 July 2015: He's only saying this because he wants to do the same thing himself!
He wants to sleep around and that's why he's also nudging you towards it, and maybe he thinks you can both swing together.
This guy isn't the monogamous type and if you are, ... (read in full...)
Do we all have a soul mate or soul mates? What signalled for you that a particular person was the ''one''?
Q. Questions for the men and women on this site. 1 ) how old were you when you found the " one "? 2) did u ever give up waiting? 3) were u ever jealous if someone find their special someone before you? 4) do you believe in waiting for that spec...
A. 10 July 2015: 1 ) How old were you when you found the " one "?
31
2) Did u ever give up waiting?
No, because I believed in love and despite all the bad times that I'd had in my love life, I was hopeful that I would one day meet someone who I deserved a... (read in full...)
Sharing cost 50/50 in relationship?? How does it work?
Q. I been seeing this guy for about 4 months now. When we usually go out he pays for dinner, movies, or anything else we do. I help to pay here and there. Mostly he is the one paying. The other day, he ask that we should share the cost 50/50 and that ...
A. 9 July 2015: My fiance makes a lot more money than I do, yet I pay whenever and wherever I can. He rushes to pay most of the time and doesn't allow me to pay but I don't like the fact that he should do the bulk of the paying and he knows that, so from time to ... (read in full...)
My boyfriend is spending time with his kid's Mum, am I right to be annoyed?
Q. ? Boyfriend Spending Time With kids mom So basically, ive been seeing a guy for 6 months now, we both have one child each. When we first got together him and his ex (who he was with for 8 years, broken up 2 years) weren't on great terms b...
A. 7 July 2015: If she wont let you meet the kid and your boyfriend and the ex weren't on great terms earlier buts seem to be doing fine now, then I feel she's trying to wean your B/f away from you. And he's allowing her to do so.
Why doesn't she let you meet the... (read in full...)
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