| Latest articles: Women and Men: Being Equal
This question has 5 answers by readers of DearCupid.ORG.
Newest answer was posted
22 January 2011: When your in a relationship, either married or dating I think it is safe to say that equality in that relationship is a very good thing. I'm interested in seeing what everyone can come up with for equality points in a relationship. I'm not really ...
Lost puppy effect.
This question has 4 answers by readers of DearCupid.ORG.
Newest answer was posted
7 September 2010: With a friend of mine going through a break up at the moment I have noticed the common behavior of her bf which I want to call the lost puppy effect. Some back ground on the situation is that she broke up with him and is moving on and going through ...
To break up or not to break up? That is the question.
This question has 4 answers by readers of DearCupid.ORG.
Newest answer was posted
23 February 2010: This article is inspired by two friends of mine who are together in a relationship and its for all those men and women who think that they want to end their realationship but don't quite know yet. All relationships hit rocky patches where you have...
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I'm confused, am I bi or gay?
Q. 3 years ago when i was 13 i discoverd i liked men and now im 15 i still like men but im not sure about girls anymore, im really confused right now so can i just have some advice please?...
A. 12 April 2011: I think that you are just at the point in your life where you are figuring things out. You could be either or but it will take some time to work itself out. It may change still so I wouldn't worry about. Just go with how your body feels for now. ... (read in full...)
I want to go back on the dating site, but my ex is there. Please help.
Q. What do you think? would it be weird if I did this? ? ? My ex boyfriend and I met on a dating site, we dated for a long time, he told me he loved me everyday and I loved him a lot. But he lied to me, cheated and dumped me.. He really hurt me.. ...
A. 11 April 2011: I don't see why it would be weird. Chances are he doesn't check the site if he is with anyone else and if he is still on it then there is no reason you have to communicate with him if he tries.
Get back out there how ever you want to. There is no r... (read in full...)
I am upset with my cousin for not telling me she was pregnant before we had unprotected sex!
Q. This is so wrong. i have been seeing my cousin for the past seventeen years, although we have both moved on and got married to our loved ones, ever chance we get like in family gatherings we still have sex. my wife is now not in town, i was with my ...
A. 11 April 2011: Well at least you know that she won't get pregnant from you this time. My understanding is that you two meet up for sex so it is in her best interest to not tell you something that would put you off from having sex with her. My advice to you would ... (read in full...)
How can a boy like a girl and suddenly change their mind?
Q. how can a boy like a girl and suddenly cnage their mind for no reason?...
A. 11 April 2011: It's really based on him liking one girl for one reason and not as a collective person so when he finds something else that catches his eye he goes for that instead. It sucks but it is unavoidable at that age. Both boys and girls do this, some for ... (read in full...)
Abusive partner...
Q. I asked for advise on my partner of 12 months not long ago all the advise was great i wanted to take it but now its a whole different ball ground.... ok i dont want advise telling me to leave him because i cant.... My partner asked me when he lost ...
A. 9 April 2011: How are things worse? When you leave a guy like this there really has to be a cutting of contact between you two. I am guessing he is tormenting you which I know you have the strength to get him to stop. Death is not a logical answer, you still have ... (read in full...)
Why do I cry so much over this boy?
Q. why do i cry so much over one boy? i like him and we used to talk quite a bit but then a girl in my year asked him out with me and he said no hes a year and 7 months older than me now he doesnt talk to me at all and he deleted me from facebook...
A. 8 April 2011: It would probably be best not to have him in your life. I have tried to have ex's for friends and it never seems to go very well because you are always prone to fighting. It's nice that you try and being civil is the best thing to do but I think you ... (read in full...)
There's this boy and I want to know if he likes me...
Q. I sit next to my crush in a class. Recently we have been getting for friendly with each other and talking and joking around more. He also kind of teases me. Yesterday, he bent down next to me to pick up something and my fingers brushed his hair ...
A. 7 April 2011: It sounds like he is interested but that doesn't mean that there aren't other girls. If you are interested him then just talk to him the next time you see him and get to knwo him. ... (read in full...)
Didn't hear from her for months. Do you think she still cares?
Q. i met this gal ages ago about October last year online we have been talking a lot until few months ago i emailed her no reply for some weeks. i got a reply today does she still love me and why has she replied so late to my email??? please help ...
A. 7 April 2011: She may have gone through a rough patch in her life that she couldn't bring you into. That's the problem with meeting people online, you only know what they tell you. I am not saying that you two aren't in love but I do think that it would be best ... (read in full...)
My ex interferes with my new relationships
Q. Hello, I have a bit of a problem and dont no how to get rid of it. I have this new boyfriend not been together for long. But my ex who i split up with a year ago is so interfering. I split up with him because he cheated so many times and just put...
A. 7 April 2011: Then stay strong and try not to let your ex bother you too much. He will go away eventaully when he realizes the new guy is here to stay or he finds someone else. My ex's never got along and I would always hear what they thought of each other. ... (read in full...)
I don't want to be biracial!
Q. I am a 16 year old boy named Cherno. I am a mulatto. I was born in Sweden, my mom is Swedish and my dad is Nigerian (African).I lived in Sweden before moving to Canada. It is not easy being of two races, but I always identify myself with white. I ...
A. 7 April 2011: First thing is the fact that you are not just white. You are who you are and there is nothing wrong with that. I have multiple friends who are mulatto and there is nothing wrong with that. Music, clothing and life style doesn't have a race. At least ... (read in full...)
Stick it out with the current boyfriend or go after ex?
Q. me and my boyfriend have been dating for four months, and two months into our relationship my old love became single. i haven persued it, although i know i have outragous feelings still for my old love as well as my current. my current boyfriend is ...
A. 7 April 2011: I would say don't be with either of them. It's obvious that you are not over your ex but I have strong beliefs that you should not go back to an ex unless neither one of you wanted to break up in the first place. For example if you two moved away ... (read in full...)
Why do I cry so much over this boy?
Q. why do i cry so much over one boy? i like him and we used to talk quite a bit but then a girl in my year asked him out with me and he said no hes a year and 7 months older than me now he doesnt talk to me at all and he deleted me from facebook...
A. 7 April 2011: At your age this boy feels like he was a big part of your life which is why you feel sad. As you go through life you look back and wonder why those things were such a big deal to you back then but it is ok to be sad.
In time you will get over him ... (read in full...)
Do men ever do this during sex?
Q. Do men ever like to press the head of their penis against their partner's clitoris, and rub it up and dawn hard?...
A. 7 April 2011: When getting into things I would that yes it is enjoyable but things have to be well lubricated to go harder or faster. I have actually given my gf an orgasm like that when we were fooling around. ... (read in full...)
Condom or No Condom, Which feels better?
Q. Hey guys, is your amount of pleasure decreased at all by use of a condom? Or do you get the same amount of pleasure either way? Have you ever done it with a woman who used a female condom? What is your best description of the physical sensation when ...
A. 7 April 2011: I find it more pleasurable without a condom but it's not that much better that I would risk it by not using one. I have never used a female condom but to my understanding they take away sensation from the woman while a regular condom does not so I ... (read in full...)
My ex interferes with my new relationships
Q. Hello, I have a bit of a problem and dont no how to get rid of it. I have this new boyfriend not been together for long. But my ex who i split up with a year ago is so interfering. I split up with him because he cheated so many times and just put...
A. 7 April 2011: Don't be friends with or be nice to your ex. He doesn't need to be part of your life at all if he is going to be like that. Tell your new bf that you have cut this guy out because he has cheated on you and want his support in pushing this guy away. ... (read in full...)
I'm 26, she's 17, is it wrong to pursue a relationship?
Q. Im a 26 year old guy and iv recently been seeing a 17 year old girl, we have literally everything in common and get on so well. Been out on a few occasions and we both like eachother. Would it be wrong to ever start a relationship??...
A. 7 April 2011: I would definitely wait until she is 18 but although there is a rather large age and life difference between you there is nothing wrong with you two dating. People will judge but we can't help who we fall in love with. Also the age gap seems bad now ... (read in full...)
Sexual encounter btw an 18 yr and 25 yr? legal yes but is it ok?
Q. Thoughts on a recent high school graduate having sex with a 25 yo? Or a college sophomore dating a 26 yo? I know its legal but is it appropriate?...
A. 6 April 2011: You are both adults and could be in very similar walks of life so there is no reason why it would be inapropriate. You can't help who you have feelings for. The age gap will stay the same but yet every year it will seem to shrink smaller and ... (read in full...)
My BF's political views are self destructive. I will be leaving and I am worried about what he will do when I'm gone.
Q. I think my boyfriend is delusional and lost. We're both 16 and he's confusing me so much. We come from different backgrounds. I live a comfortable middle class suburban life and go to private school. He goes to a rough school (People have been ...
A. 6 April 2011: I want you to really think to yourself if you will miss all of him in those three weeks or will you just be missing the idea of you two together and all the effort you have put into this relationship. He does need help but I don't think that you are ... (read in full...)
I saw my ex girlfriend cheating. Should I get involved?
Q. There was this girl I used to be best friends with, lets call her Sydney, but when this new girl came along, lets call her Amber, all of a sudden Sydney was leaving no time for me and always hanging out with Amber. Amber and I didn't like each ...
A. 6 April 2011: Don't say anything because in the end everyone will just turn on you for bringing this up and you end up taking all the blame. Trust in the fact that their game won't last forever and they will be caught without your help.
Even if they have proo... (read in full...)
How do I come accross as nice guy even when her boyfriend is around?
Q. well my friends and i are going to the cinema tomorrow and the girl i like is going as well and i want to show her that i can be a nice guy because i think she has a little thing for me but her boyfriend who is coming with us treats her like rubbish ...
A. 6 April 2011: Just be caring and talk to her. Show her that you care about what she is saying, also hold the door for her and let her take a seat before you so she doesn't have to squish by. Maybe then she can see that she should be with a gentleman instead of ... (read in full...)
Don't want my ex to know he is the father. Is it right not to tell him?
Q. Hello, I'm pregnant with my ex's baby. He doesn't know yet and I'm debating about him ever knowing. I left him because he hurt my pets and was very mean to my son (who is 2). He would call my son names, say that he would grow up gay and things l...
A. 6 April 2011: In your situation I think that you are right for keeping this. It's in the baby's best interest and I think the kid would grow up much better not knowing their father then having a broken home with one.
No one has to know who the father is. You ... (read in full...)
Is the fake cigarette anything like the real thing?
Q. I just tried one of those fake cigarettes that help you stop smoking but is it anything like the real thing?...
A. 6 April 2011: The fake cigarettes would just put nicotine into your body. I tried a cigarette once. It tasted terrible and made me smell like crap for hours. I would tell anyone to go have a beer before they consider smoking. I would have to say that it wouldn't ... (read in full...)
Wife of many years asking to be spanked
Q. Hi my wife and i have been mnarried for many years and we have had a good sex life. A few weeks back we went on a cruie and one night could hear the couple next door having sex which turned us both on. then we heard the wife asking to be spa...
A. 5 April 2011: You can always try different materials as well as take various things, soft and rough and run then over her body. Inner thighs and arms would be good spots. If she is really into it you could always blind fold her or gently tie her up with something ... (read in full...)
My husband is a heroin addict and I just found out I'm pregnant
Q. Hi, I've just found out I'm pregnant with my first baby The baby wasn't planned but my husband and I have been married for two years and I have openly wanted kids....anyway...there's one small problem...my husband is a heroin addict...it all ...
A. 5 April 2011: Offer to suport him through treatment for the addiction and see if he will change for you and his future child. If that doesn't work then I hope seeing the baby will help him get clean because he may be the nicest guy ever but he can't really be ... (read in full...)
How to find the courage to ask someone out for the first time?
Q. I am a male teenaget st 16. And i still havent 'went out' with anyone yet. Most of my friends have girlfriends now and have had them for a while. Although i am quite popular in school I am still single. I just really need help with asking people ...
A. 5 April 2011: To ask someone out pick an activity or just a nice place to talk with them and ask them if they would like to go out with you. Generally you want to stay away from places where you are unable to talk like a movie but you don't want to go out for a ... (read in full...)
Co-worker's suspicious bathroom behavior makes me wonder if she has an eating disorder?
Q. This really skinny girl I work with was in the stall next to me today in the ladies room. She spoke to some coworkers and then they all left. I was being very quiet so no one knew I was in there. Her feet were facing the toilet and she was standing ...
A. 5 April 2011: Yeah it sounds like she has a problem but its not really your business to help her unless she asks you first. She will probably over react if you say anything which will make the situation worse. ... (read in full...)
Should I confront my mom about her affair?
Q. Some quick background information: I'm 17 years old. My parents got divorced when I was little. While my mother has remarried, my father has not. I am still extremely close to my father. My stepfather and I, on the other hand, do not get along very ...
A. 5 April 2011: On one hand I want to say that you should stay out of it and play like you don't know anything just to let things play out the way they are meant to. What you mom is doing is wrong and I think it would be best to tell her that you know what is going ... (read in full...)
Would you consider sending dirty pics cheating?
Q. Okay so i'm a teenager, its not likely that ill marry my bf, and i'm texting a few other guys, they always try to get me to talk dirty to them or send them pics but i wont, i tell them i'm not like that, i was wondering though if i did do something ...
A. 4 April 2011: Yeah that would be cheating. It has all the intentions of a sexual act. ... (read in full...)
Why am I having a period right after I just had one?
Q. Hey there, I had my period about a week ago and now suddenly I have started another one. Today is when I started it April 3 2011. What does this mean?...
A. 4 April 2011: I would say that it has to do with your birth control then. Sometimes the specific pill that you are taking just doesn't work well with your body anymore. It would probably be best to mention this to your doctor and see what they say. Again though ... (read in full...)
Why am I having a period right after I just had one?
Q. Hey there, I had my period about a week ago and now suddenly I have started another one. Today is when I started it April 3 2011. What does this mean?...
A. 4 April 2011: It could still be the birth control acting up. If it happens again you should ask your doctor. Other than that there probably isn't anything wrong and yes they will become regular in time. Also it might be a stress or change in diet thing but as of ... (read in full...)
How Much of My Own Beliefs and Opinions Should Enter DearCupidAnswers?
Q. I've noticed that in some of my answers to questions on this site, I have allowed my personal beliefs to color my opinions. So my question is, is that wrong? It seems nearly impossible to take my whole self out of the equation, but what level i...
A. 4 April 2011: Beliefs are fine and they are what allows people to get such a good range of advice from the site. There can be an issue with very strong opinions in that we do not want aunts to argue between themselves on the site. I don't know if you mean rel... (read in full...)
Wife of many years asking to be spanked
Q. Hi my wife and i have been mnarried for many years and we have had a good sex life. A few weeks back we went on a cruie and one night could hear the couple next door having sex which turned us both on. then we heard the wife asking to be spa...
A. 4 April 2011: I am confused if you actually have a question about this. I think it is perfectly normal and if you both enjoy it then there is no reason to stop. It's good that you two are open and that you can keep sex interesting because it is a common problem ... (read in full...)
Why am I having a period right after I just had one?
Q. Hey there, I had my period about a week ago and now suddenly I have started another one. Today is when I started it April 3 2011. What does this mean?...
A. 4 April 2011: Have you recently started birth control? Also when you are young your body is still working out the hormone balance so it isn't uncommon for irregularities still in the next year or two. ... (read in full...)
Is asking her to the pub on campus OK for a date?
Q. alright 2 part question here, so there is this girl i at college i really want to ask out. she and i usually talk when we see each other and waive if we are in a hurry, anyway a few days ago she mentioned that she and her boyfriend had broken up but ...
A. 4 April 2011: I know what you mean. Just keep it simple, saying that you really like her and hope that you two can keep in touch and get to know each other. Also you could tell her that you think she is beautiful but the big thing is keeping it simple and not ... (read in full...)
Are men turned off by women who wear braces?
Q. Are men turned off by women who wear braces? I had them fitted last week, I really hate them and feel they make me look unattractive! My long distance boyfriend is due to see me again soon, we're in love but I'm worried he won't be attracted to...
A. 3 April 2011: I love the braces look. They can be very cute and I'm sure he'll like them. Even if you are a little shy about them that can make it even cuter. ... (read in full...)
My dad walked in on me.
Q. My Dad walked in on me naked in the shower the other day, was very embarrassing for both of us. Should I talk to him about it or just ignore it?...
A. 2 April 2011: I would say just ignore it. Things like this happen and its not like there was any issue here. He was probably just as embarresed or more than you. It's best just to laugh and put it behind you. ... (read in full...)
Is asking her to the pub on campus OK for a date?
Q. alright 2 part question here, so there is this girl i at college i really want to ask out. she and i usually talk when we see each other and waive if we are in a hurry, anyway a few days ago she mentioned that she and her boyfriend had broken up but ...
A. 2 April 2011: I think you should tell her how you feel and keep in touch with her but its hard to say if you should wait for her and not just go out and be free in the summer.
When you don't see her too much I'm sure you still flirt so it shouldn't move into... (read in full...)
Should I continue to talk and be sexual with ex or just let her go?
Q. I dated my ex for almost 3 years. she ended the relationship she said I didnt do anything wrong she just had fallen out of love but we both admitted that and that we loves eachother still just not in love. well weve been split up for over a year ...
A. 30 March 2011: I think you should let her go. If you start sleeping with her it will never allow you to get over her and chances are you will miss out on a wonderful world of girls around you. It sound like she wants you to wait for her so she can decide whether ... (read in full...)
What are the chances that the baby is not my boyfriend's?
Q. Please don't judge me for this I feel awful as it is - I am currently almost eight months pregnant. I am due on may 10th and my last period began on august the fifth. I have a steady boyfriend who I am sorry to say I cheated on once on the evening ...
A. 30 March 2011: It sounds like it is unlikely but still possible. I think the best thing you can do is forget that night ever happened and be with your bf to raise the child. I don't see any point in him second guessing whether the child is his or not because he ... (read in full...)
Is asking her to the pub on campus OK for a date?
Q. alright 2 part question here, so there is this girl i at college i really want to ask out. she and i usually talk when we see each other and waive if we are in a hurry, anyway a few days ago she mentioned that she and her boyfriend had broken up but ...
A. 30 March 2011: I don't know if she would directly see it as a date but it does set you up really well to ask her out. It is a really nice way to get to know her and make sure she knows that you are interested her. Its a non threatning way to get to know her, which ... (read in full...)
Facebook guy trying to make me do stuff!
Q. my name is matthew and im having trouuble online on facebook with this boy he's trying to make to do stuff on cam and he is asking me to have sex with him and im not gay and i dont know what to do if anyone can help me it would be appriciated ...
A. 30 March 2011: On fb there should be a link for a way to contact the people who run the site. You can file a complaint with them to have him removed from the site and then block him in anyway that you can. You should also be able to change your settings to a ... (read in full...)
Is asking her to the pub on campus OK for a date?
Q. alright 2 part question here, so there is this girl i at college i really want to ask out. she and i usually talk when we see each other and waive if we are in a hurry, anyway a few days ago she mentioned that she and her boyfriend had broken up but ...
A. 28 March 2011: If its just the two of you then I think that she would still see it as a date. You're right with dinner being alot of pressure but this could just be a study snack where you two can just order something like finger food which gives you time to talk. ... (read in full...)
Is asking her to the pub on campus OK for a date?
Q. alright 2 part question here, so there is this girl i at college i really want to ask out. she and i usually talk when we see each other and waive if we are in a hurry, anyway a few days ago she mentioned that she and her boyfriend had broken up but ...
A. 26 March 2011: I think that it would be a good idea. Its not like you want to be all over this girl so early on so a somewhere too formal may over whelm her. This way you two can talk and get to know each other. Also it would be something that is most available to ... (read in full...)
Abusive partner...
Q. I asked for advise on my partner of 12 months not long ago all the advise was great i wanted to take it but now its a whole different ball ground.... ok i dont want advise telling me to leave him because i cant.... My partner asked me when he lost ...
A. 9 February 2011: I know you have the strength and we are here to help you along this path as well with whatever you may need us for. ... (read in full...)
Abusive partner...
Q. I asked for advise on my partner of 12 months not long ago all the advise was great i wanted to take it but now its a whole different ball ground.... ok i dont want advise telling me to leave him because i cant.... My partner asked me when he lost ...
A. 3 February 2011: Well then it's really hard to say. I hope they work. I do understand where you are coming from though where you care so much that you don't want to just abandon him. Maybe you two can try classes together so that you two can learn to cooperate with ... (read in full...)
Abusive partner...
Q. I asked for advise on my partner of 12 months not long ago all the advise was great i wanted to take it but now its a whole different ball ground.... ok i dont want advise telling me to leave him because i cant.... My partner asked me when he lost ...
A. 3 February 2011: I feel truely sorry for you if you think that you can't leave him. You can leave him and have your friends with you till things cool down. Or the cops would do wonders for this idea he has in his head.
He needs some conseling fast. I'm not sayi... (read in full...)
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