| Latest articles: Women and Men: Being Equal
This question has 5 answers by readers of DearCupid.ORG.
Newest answer was posted
22 January 2011: When your in a relationship, either married or dating I think it is safe to say that equality in that relationship is a very good thing. I'm interested in seeing what everyone can come up with for equality points in a relationship. I'm not really ...
Lost puppy effect.
This question has 4 answers by readers of DearCupid.ORG.
Newest answer was posted
7 September 2010: With a friend of mine going through a break up at the moment I have noticed the common behavior of her bf which I want to call the lost puppy effect. Some back ground on the situation is that she broke up with him and is moving on and going through ...
To break up or not to break up? That is the question.
This question has 4 answers by readers of DearCupid.ORG.
Newest answer was posted
23 February 2010: This article is inspired by two friends of mine who are together in a relationship and its for all those men and women who think that they want to end their realationship but don't quite know yet. All relationships hit rocky patches where you have...
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Feeling guilt about imagining sex with my ex-girlfriend's best friend!
Q. Few weeks back, I masturbated while imagining sex with my ex-girlfriend's best friend and I did that for like two consecutive days . Afterwards and now I am feeling guilty for having done that stupid thing as she used to give me so much respect. ...
A. 5 July 2011: Don't feel guilty about this. The whole point of masturbating is to have fantasies that would most likely never happen so that in your head you can live them out. It doesn't mean that you would actually do those things.
Getting rid of the guilt come... (read in full...)
Can you fall in love with someone you've never met?
Q. As the title says, do you think you can fall in love with someone you've never met? Or have you?...
A. 5 July 2011: In all honestly I don't think you can. I think you fall for what you are thinking the person is like which may or may not change after you meet the person.
I have fallen for the idea of girls before actually being with and meeting them but neve... (read in full...)
Sore throat after blow job?
Q. Hi, I've been with my boyfriend for a just over a year now but have only started giving him blow jobs recently. I always get a sore throat the next morning, and it lasts for a few days and then goes away. Is this anything to worry about? He'...
A. 5 July 2011: It sounds like you may be taking it too deep and your throat is irritated. It doesn't sound like an infection or anything other then physical stress.
It says that he doesn't cum but yet it says you swallow. I am assuming that the case is that he d... (read in full...)
Is this girl messing my mates about or is she interested in all three?
Q. Someone please explain is this girl messing my best mates about, or actually interested in all three of them? I want to know she's not toying with them like some girls do. She's my mate also and is a really nice girl, we went to college together...
A. 5 July 2011: I don't think there was much going on. I mean they would flirt and she may have liked each one of them but that doesn't mean head over heels for them. It is quite easy to jump from liking one person to another.
To me it sounds like she is a frie... (read in full...)
Second chance..do I deserve it with this guy?
Q. When i was 14 i was really close with this guy, we were so close for about 1 and a half years, then he asked me out. He would have been my first ever boyfriend but because of that i freaked out and said no. After that for a while it was awkward ...
A. 1 July 2011: Yes of course you still deserve him. You haven't done anything wrong and I hope he is still willing to get together with you. You were just weren't ready when he asked and that is not your fault. It probably hurt him but it's not like you did it ... (read in full...)
Found out my friends are a little two faced - what now?
Q. My bestfriend who i have known for around 4 years now had started turning a bit cold recently and its been bugging me. We still go out and have parties and talk about everything, but i was on her social network account tonight she left unattended at ...
A. 30 June 2011: Well first off it was wrong to look through the account but I would be tempted with the curiousity as well. The problem is if you canfront them on it they will know you were in the account so I wouldn't say anything until you have some physical ... (read in full...)
Is uni worth it or should I quit and live life like my brother?
Q. I have a question about university and the point of it, because I'm a first year, just finished my first semester and I'm studying for a Bachelor of Arts, majoring in history. Lately it just seems that, for starters, if I did get my degree then ...
A. 28 June 2011: I would say that yes it is because it gives you the security of being payed for what you know not what you can do. Yes some people do make without school but that gets harder and harder every year. I am a forth year chemistry student and I do ... (read in full...)
I have been touched but not ready to reciprocate, what should I do/say?
Q. My boyfriend and I have been together for 2 years and yesterday he touched me 'down there' (just outside my clothes) for the first time. I'm not ready to reciprocate just yet, but I feel selfish because I'll receive but not give. I was getting to ...
A. 28 June 2011: You should tell him that you want to stay away from the sexual side of things because you are not ready yet and you feel that it is unfair for him to do these things for you and not get anything in return.
The right thing to do is to wait unti... (read in full...)
Men and porn!!! Why do they need it?
Q. I need help! I don't understand why my boyfriend has 2 look at porn!! I'm beautiful why can't I be enough? He says I wouldn't understand. We have been together 6yrs an he's hid it the whole time until I cought him! I told him 2 make me understand an ...
A. 27 June 2011: First off I don't see why you would watch porn and not masturbate. It's not like it's exactly quality acting. The thing to note is that he is not using it to replace you, it is just something for his personal time. Men tend to be more visual ... (read in full...)
I am stuck in a relationship that I want to end!
Q. why Cant i end it? My gf has cheated on me three times she has lied to me and when i finally got to ending it she started telling me she loved me. I still care for her. Though i have told her Im not taking any more crap which appears to make her...
A. 25 June 2011: I had this problem a while ago with a girl I was dating. I knew that it had to end because the relationship was nothing but anger towards each other. What I did was tell myself that when she came up to see me I would tell her. Don't try to prepare ... (read in full...)
Should I see the guy who dumped me? I don't want to hurt any more.
Q. What should I do about him? I dont want to hurt anymore:(? My ex boyfriend's best friend told me my ex's been having a hard time dealing with our break up.. He says he's been drinking and he feels horrible for breaking up with me and that he...
A. 23 June 2011: If your heart is telling you to give him another shot then I think you should. Just go slow and don't fall back into the same routine. In order for this to work you need to start a new relationship, not pick up where the old one left off.
He may ... (read in full...)
How do I break my trust habits from my previous relationship and try to be all I can for my BF now?
Q. Ok guys here is my problem. I have a new bf and we have been together for about 3 months now. I have built up some bad defensive habits from my previous relationship and idk how to break them. Like asking why he is going to friends house or ...
A. 23 June 2011: This isn't something that will happen over night but you need to remind yourself that he isn't the same as your ex every time you start to doubt things. Tell yourself that it is a new relationship with a completely new guy and you don't have to ... (read in full...)
I want to build muscle but everyone will make fun of me!
Q. I'm embarrassed even to ask this. I want to work out and build some muscle (I'm kinda weedy). But if I buy some weights and stuff for home I know family and mates will think its funny cos I'm the lanky one and the last person they would expect to ...
A. 22 June 2011: First thing is good for you for wanting to work out. I would seek an outside source for workout advice. Maybe check out your local gym and see if you can meet with someone for a while to learn proper exercises then you will know what you need to by ... (read in full...)
I'm tired of feeling unappreciated and frustrated. Any advice is welcome.
Q. I ended up getting involved with a close friend of 3 years (he's in my close circle of friends) 2 months ago. His father recently passed away and now it seems like he's spiraling out of control. He's always out partying and drinking something he ...
A. 18 June 2011: Tell him you wish him all the best and that you hope his troubles don't stay with him but you can't be apart of his life anymore. Then just walk away. The hard part is that I don't think you can save a friendship out of this one, atleast until he ... (read in full...)
Why did you cheat on your wife?
Q. To all of you married men out there that have strayed - why did you do it? I had a brief sexual affair with a married coworker - a 2 night stand if you will - and am curious what it was that made him go there. I did not initiate it but I went al...
A. 18 June 2011: I basically cheated on gf of mine years ago. It wasn't much but now I understand why it happened.
I think the main reason people cheat is because they are looking to fill in something that is missing from their current relationship. Some will chea... (read in full...)
Boyfriend wants to get tatoos but not of our names. Is he insecure of our future?
Q. My fiance wants to get matching couple tattoos but not each others names. It makes me feel like he is unsure about our future. Could that be the reason why?? I want to get his name on me and he get my name on him. I want this because i see a future ...
A. 18 June 2011: I don't think that he would want this if he was unsure about the future. It's true that a tattoo won't keep you two together and he would not want that on his body if he didn't truely want to be with you.
My concern is how long you two have thou... (read in full...)
Does your belly button change when you get older?
Q. Hi, quick question, is your belly button supposed to get shallow (shorter in depth) when you get older or does that mean something that else makes a belly button get shorter?...
A. 16 June 2011: As far as I know it stays pretty consistent but then again everyone is different. It may change due to weight gain or weight loss but most likely once you have finished growing it would stay the same. ... (read in full...)
Cheated on my girlfriend, in love with the other woman and my girlfriend is pregnant!
Q. I am in a sad situation and don't know what to do. In October of last year I met a woman on the internet. We started seeing each other and things were going well. I thought I was falling in love with her. Then a monkey wrench came alone in the form ...
A. 16 June 2011: I think if you truely love this other women then you should go be with her. I think it is better for the child to have separated parents rather then ones who really aren't truely happy together because I know you will feel an empty spot inside if ... (read in full...)
Were the doctor's questions to my wife inappropriate and invasive?
Q. I would like some advice/opinions about a doctor. My wife of over 20 years went to the OB/GYN last week for her annual pap test. I went with her. It came out clear no issues, then the doctor (male) wanted to talk with her in his office. I went in ...
A. 16 June 2011: That does sound very close to sexual harrasment to me. Asking about oral sex is fine but whether she swallowed or not has none or very little bearing on the concern of the doctor. Remember too that you have th right to not answer a doctors questions ... (read in full...)
Girlfriend doesn't want to have sex after being raped 6 years ago
Q. My girl friend got rapped at the age of 18,and now she is 24 since then she didn't want to sleep with a man again.She is always afraid,that it will hurt her though she feel like doing it.Now it's difficult trying to sleep with her due to her past ...
A. 16 June 2011: You can go extremely slow, stay away from sudden movements that she would preceive as aggression while you two are doing anything from kissing to touching and so on. This should prove to her that you aren't going to hurt her. It would probably be ... (read in full...)
I kissed her goodnight and she said that Koreans don't act that way. I'm confused!
Q. I'm going to try to keep this brief as possible. I asked out this Korean girl at a restaurant I frequent for lunch while working. We went out, she was pretty nervous because her english isn't that great. We walked around, talked, had dinner a...
A. 16 June 2011: I would go let her know by text that you want to speak with her and that you will be stopping by on friday. You don't want to be there when she is working though. When you tell her this she will either tell you no in which case it is best to think ... (read in full...)
He's with a lot of woman in his Facebook photos, could this mean he's a player?
Q. If a guy hangs around with lots of women, does that mean he is a player, or could they just be his friends? I know some could be relatives too. I recently met this guy in a bar . We haven't been on a date yet, but he is on my friends list on ...
A. 15 June 2011: The actual answer to this is no, he may be but none of that is concrete proof. I have very few guy friends and make friends with girls very easily so I hang out with alot of girls and i'm not a player. He may just be more comfortable with girls. ... (read in full...)
In love with my third-cousin
Q. Dear Cupid My 3rd cousin n i were in love, but we never had anything. the family notice we had feelings for each other. He's was forbidden to be with me. We grow apart. we older now n and just got in contact. We still in love. Is it okay to be wi...
A. 15 June 2011: The general answer to that is legally yes but my most peoples morals no. It may cause problems in the family but there is actually nothing stopping you two from being together.
In my opinion you should get together if it makes you two happy. ... (read in full...)
I kissed her goodnight and she said that Koreans don't act that way. I'm confused!
Q. I'm going to try to keep this brief as possible. I asked out this Korean girl at a restaurant I frequent for lunch while working. We went out, she was pretty nervous because her english isn't that great. We walked around, talked, had dinner a...
A. 15 June 2011: It is true that it is out of their culture to do that sort of thing and she may have very strict parents. A friend of mine is really big into korean culture but the thing is that what you are talking about is very traditional. My thoughts are that ... (read in full...)
Why did he lie to me about breaking up with her?
Q. I've been talking to this guy for like eight months. He has had a girlfriend for the whole time at first we weer just friends but then we started hanging out and flirting.he kept telling me that hé was going to break up with her. A little whilee ago ...
A. 14 June 2011: He's cheating. He is just telling you that so you are more comfortable with the idea while he is getting both of you. He is winning here while both of you are the ones losing. Just get rid of this guy, nothing good will even come from him leaving ... (read in full...)
I didn't realize we were having company? Where are you going?
Q. Say your gf/bf was hanging out with you all day until you have to go to work. Then all of a sudden, their friends show up to get them. There was no talk of the friends coming by or that they were leaving with them. How would you feel? How should you ...
A. 13 June 2011: I don't know if that would really bother me. I mean he didn't bail on time you were supposed to be together. He may just not have mentioned it which does happen. You can't expect to know all of his plans. Was it for a party or just a night out which ... (read in full...)
I feel as though I'm not good enough for him, should I try changing?
Q. I've not felt like this for a while but I'm starting to think I'm not good enough. My boyfriend reassures me that I am however there's something in the back of my mind that's screaming 'you're not his type'. Do people really have a type? and if so ...
A. 13 June 2011: I do think that people do have a type that they do prefer. Now the thing is that the person who is perceiving the typed prefered by their partner is usually not what the person actually feels. Sometimes it can be close but alot of the time it tends ... (read in full...)
Weightloss - does it affect your breasts first???
Q. Is it true when a female loses weight the first place she loses it is her breasts!?! Because that's what my mum said her trainer told her... And i've lost weight and been measured and my breasts have reduced by an inch already? It's annoying me, i ...
A. 13 June 2011: It is generally true but keep in mind that they will not shrink away to nothing. most of the time they will get a bit smaller but then stay the same while the rest of your body loses the weight. With weight loss though the first place you lose ... (read in full...)
I realize I am a lesbian. Do I follow my heart, or honor my family?
Q. I have realized I'm a lesbian for at least a year but Im just barely starting to come out to a few ppl. I have always thought I was straight. I was taught as a little girl that being gay is sin and wrong. My father is also a minister. I started ...
A. 12 June 2011: Follow your heart. Being gay isn't something you can just turn on and off, it is part of who you are and to deny that will probably hurt you far too much in the long run. It will be tough for a while but because your parents do love you they will ... (read in full...)
Does he seem to be a bit too controlling?
Q. Does this guy I talk to sound a bit controlling/overprotective? First of all we met online. He likes my pictures but said he felt some of them were too sexy and some of the dresses were too short. He said he prefers the more casual/cell phon...
A. 12 June 2011: That guy raises too many red flags. You haven't even met the guy (to my knowledge) and he is already telling you what he wants of you specifically.
I understand him commenting on the pictures because that is just what people do but to tell you not ... (read in full...)
I want to be reassured that when I start college I'll make new friends
Q. Hello everyone, I am 15 years old and well my life seems quite boring. I go to school come home, do homework then whatever else, at the weekend I don't see anyone from school, I have friends but we never go out at the weekend or anything, they nev...
A. 12 June 2011: Well I can tell you that when I went to university I met alot of new people, some I still talk to and some I don't. Also you can meet people through work which happened a lot too. I know how you feel. I had a few close friends in high school but not ... (read in full...)
Wife cries out alot during sex. Am I hurting her?
Q. I am 39 year old man. Happily married for 12 years. We are having very good life. We are having great sex life. Atleast thrice a week. My wife cries a lot during the intercourse. After that, she does not remember anything and she is telling ...
A. 12 June 2011: My thoughts are that somewhere in her past she associated pleasure during sex with crying. I don't think it is pain that she is feeling but rather a rush of emotion that causes her to cry. Talk to her and see if you can get to the bottom of this as ... (read in full...)
Why would a guy say he liked me shoes?
Q. What does it mean when a guy says he likes your shoes? Can a man really like a pair of cork wedges, really?! ...
A. 12 June 2011: Chances are it was meant to be a general compliment to you. It's more of an innocent one that doesn't run the risk of you immediately thinking he has other motives. Of course he may just have liked the shoes. There are tons of guys now who are into ... (read in full...)
How long should I wait before asking another girl out?
Q. I broke up with my gf on Friday and I just wanted some peoples opinion on how long should I wait before i ask another girl out. I wasn't going to do it straight away but some others opinions please?...
A. 12 June 2011: I would give it a month or two. It really depends how long you two dated. If it was short then a month would be fine provided that you are over the relationship. If it was longer then give it more time otherwise the girl may see herself as the ... (read in full...)
For the men: what perfume do you like on women?
Q. Question for the men: what kind of perfume/scent do you like a woman to wear? Do you like flowery scents? Woody? Fruity/Citrusy? Musky? Or any other kind, take your pick, I'm really curious what the general consensus is on perfume. Thanks! :)...
A. 10 June 2011: I don't know much about perfume scents but I would have to say something subtle more on the fruity side for summer. I don't think too many guys are really picky as long as the scent isn't over powering. ... (read in full...)
Does a boy like a girl who always agrees?
Q. Hello everyone..I want to ask that is it good to say yes to your boyfriend for whatever he asks for.. Does a boy likes a girl who always agree for everything even physical contacts??...
A. 10 June 2011: No not at all. I wouldn't stay with a girl like that. I like a girl who has an opinion and isn't afraid to say what she wants. ... (read in full...)
I fancy his personality, not his looks. Is that shallow?
Q. i really like this boy at college, and i no he likes me too as hes told me, we flirt all the time and we recently went on a residential trip with college and we was together all the time, everyone noes we like each other and asking why we are not ...
A. 9 June 2011: Your not shallow at all. Relationships are built from a personalltiy connection along with physical attraction. In my opinion the relationship will always feel like it is lacking something if you don't have both of these parts although they do vary ... (read in full...)
Guys, would a girl's past FWB relationship put you off her?
Q. I'm currently in somewhat of a friends with benefits situation with a guy I know. What I want is opinions on how this may make future potential guys look at me in the future. Guys, would you keep yourself away from a girl who had previous...
A. 9 June 2011: If I saw that I could trust her to be faithful then it wouldn't matter at all. The fact is that we all have sexual urges and in my opinion it is better to have one fwb then a bunch of one night stands.
I don't like it at all when people judge some... (read in full...)
Who's in charge of the baby, me or my parents?
Q. I'm 16 years old and have a 2 month old son, me and his father are still together. My parents act like the baby is theirs and like they can make decisions that pertain to him. I'm very responsible and I do everything for my son, my boyfriend (his ...
A. 9 June 2011: You're right on this although it is best to try and respect your parents wishes as best as possible. By all legal standings you are that babies gaurdian and your parents have no legal abiltiy when it comes to your baby. With that being said you ... (read in full...)
Being back in my hometown is making me miss my ex.
Q. So me and my ex have been broken up for about two or three months. I have not spoken a word to her since I left her house after saying it was over. She told me she had feeling for a friend of hers and they have now been dating for a while now. I ...
A. 7 June 2011: I think it is probably best not to go out of your way to contact her. It may make it worse because chances are she has moved on and may give you a little bit of comfort but then not really put any effort into talking to you. Realize that there was a ... (read in full...)
I blush too much...how can I get rid of it?
Q. Can any 1 please help me. i cant stop blushing when any cute guy looks at me or talks to me!!! Its a real problem how can i get rid of it..?...
A. 7 June 2011: It really comes down to not getting too worked up when they talk to you but in the end you will most likely always be a blusher. It's not a bad thing and I'm sure guys will find it cute. ... (read in full...)
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