| Latest articles: Women and Men: Being Equal
This question has 5 answers by readers of DearCupid.ORG.
Newest answer was posted
22 January 2011: When your in a relationship, either married or dating I think it is safe to say that equality in that relationship is a very good thing. I'm interested in seeing what everyone can come up with for equality points in a relationship. I'm not really ...
Lost puppy effect.
This question has 4 answers by readers of DearCupid.ORG.
Newest answer was posted
7 September 2010: With a friend of mine going through a break up at the moment I have noticed the common behavior of her bf which I want to call the lost puppy effect. Some back ground on the situation is that she broke up with him and is moving on and going through ...
To break up or not to break up? That is the question.
This question has 4 answers by readers of DearCupid.ORG.
Newest answer was posted
23 February 2010: This article is inspired by two friends of mine who are together in a relationship and its for all those men and women who think that they want to end their realationship but don't quite know yet. All relationships hit rocky patches where you have...
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Should I trust my partner? Found photos of his ex locked up
Q. Hi, i'v been with my boyfriend for 8 years now and have 4 children together. When we moved house my 4 year old at the time pulled an envelope out and inside were pictures of his ex. I questioned him he said he didn't now he still had them and he ...
A. 18 September 2011: I don't think this is an issue of trust. It sounds to me like it is more about your insecurity. I beleive that he has a right to save things from past relationships, to a point, without questioning his trust. You should talk to him about why he is ... (read in full...)
Fwb ignoring me done nothing wrong
Q. Hi this is my problem my fwb who I have been having sex with for the past 6 months has just recently started ignoring me I text him last wednesday and got no reply and today he completely blanked me and walked straight past me what have I done wrong ...
A. 18 September 2011: It sounds like he is ending the fwb. He may have met someone and figures this is the easiest way for it to end. You most likely have done nothing wrong but as it was stated there is no commitment here and not really a reltionship that requires the ... (read in full...)
I'm confused about a reaction a girl gave me
Q. Okay... I was seeing this girl kinda casually... We talked everyday and I even brought her to her graduation... The night of her graduation we both got really drunk... I went to bed early and she followed an hour later... I was completely passe...
A. 17 September 2011: I think that she does in fact like you but she only let it slip when she was drunk and thought you wouldn't notice. I don't know why she would freak out when she found out that you like her. That seems weird to me since I would think that she would ... (read in full...)
Do gay teen boys have more boys or more girls as friends?
Q. hi im a 15 teen boy i was wondering would you find that gay teen boys will have more boys or girls as friends...
A. 17 September 2011: From my experience gay teen boys have mostly girls as friends. Especially if they are open about being gay. ... (read in full...)
How to initiate the first kiss with my boyfriend?
Q. I need help! How do I go about initiating a kiss with my boyfriend? This will be his first kiss (not mine), and I'm not sure how to kiss him. Like, should I lean in real close, or touch his face or something? Please help!...
A. 15 September 2011: The way I tend to go for the first kiss is by waiting for some sort of moment where it is appropriate then a touch (the face is a good choice), make eye contact and give it a few seconds so the person understands what is going to happen then go for ... (read in full...)
He loves me, his mother hates me. Should we get married?
Q. My fiance mother hates me and my fiance love me and wanted to marry should i go on with marriage plan?...
A. 13 September 2011: As long as you have the support of this guy and he won't let his mother walk all over you then I would marry him if you love him. His mom will just have to accept that you are part of the family and if she can't do that you don't have to deal with ... (read in full...)
My girlfriend just told me she wanted to be friends out of the blue. What should I do?
Q. Dear cupid.Am kind of confuse about my relationship right now my girlfriend wokeup one morningand told me she don't want a boyfriend any more that we can just be friend and noting attached to it. I ask her the reasons but she never gave any ...
A. 13 September 2011: In my experience this was just the nicest way she could think of for saying she is breaking up with you. You should just move on from her, you'll want another gf soon enough and it is best not to have her still being a part of your life possibly ... (read in full...)
Illegal porn on my guys computer. What do I do
Q. I have been with my partner for 8 months and we are in love. Maybe from being hurt in the past, or my inner feeling, I don't know, but I looked on his laptop and found a clip of illegal porn along with pics of men's private parts. What do I do? ...
A. 13 September 2011: You should confront him on this and see what he has to say, otherwise just tell him your leaving him. I'm questioning what you mean by illegal. Do you mean child pornography or things that look illegal? It may have been from his past and he just ... (read in full...)
Can Nair damage your private area?
Q. dear cupid, what are the risks associated with using nair on your bikini area (and i don't mean just the line...i mean everywhere)??? i've heard that it's pretty painful, but is there anything beyond that??? like, could it actually damage ...
A. 13 September 2011: Nair can do some major skin irritation damage on those sensitive areas. A friend of min who is a guy tried it right on the whole area and we could hear him screaming from the shower. The chemicals that it uses are very strong which is why they tell ... (read in full...)
If a girl lets you do things for her, does it mean she likes you?
Q. I met this girl and she asks me to drive her places, and I helped her move. I also help her out by giving her advice. My best bud says if a girl is always looking to you to help her with stuff it means she likes you. I am not sure though. I really ...
A. 13 September 2011: She could be thankful you are there to help and does in fact like you. Or she could just be using you because you are willing to do things for her. It is really hard to tell the difference because if she is using you she will act just as if she ... (read in full...)
Is she a bot, is this a scam?
Q. alright this girl friended me on facebook and I was suspicious to begin with because she is the typical facebook bot. really pretty girl and has under 100 friends. well here is what made me change my mind. My number is on my facebook and she ...
A. 9 September 2011: I would say the best option is to just stop replying to her messages. It is throwing up red flags that she just randomly added you although I have heard of people meeting that way. If you do decide to meet this girl then just make sure that it is in ... (read in full...)
His age information isn't matching up with the background check!
Q. I really really need help and advice because I'm so confused at this point. I met a guy online and at the time, his profile said he was 30 and now a year later, he's 31. I believed him. But today I was talking to a friend about stalkerish thing...
A. 9 September 2011: He may be lying just because 30 will tend to be more appealing. If you confront him he may tell you or just continue lying, then you would have to choose between him and what this program told you. If you are worried and having doubts at thirty I ... (read in full...)
Is he keeping me around to impress his friends?
Q. We're not officially together anymore,we're kinda taking a break. We're married on facebook, and when people refer to me as his girlfriend he doesn't deny it. Like if someone says he has a really pretty girlfriend, which his friends do a lot, he ...
A. 8 September 2011: It sounds like you are just an arm piece to him to show off when ever he wants you to be there. I reccomend finding someone else. My guess is there is no sexual stuff going on which would be another reason why he would want to keep you around. You ... (read in full...)
Are his different ways of saying "I love you" ways to show that he's playing me?
Q. Hi, um.......I know that this topic may seem irrelevant or small but honestly I just want some opinions. My boyfriend has been with me now for 2 years this coming september 27th. All this time he's been showing his love with his actions which I ...
A. 8 September 2011: I don't think you have anything to worry about. It sounds like he is just trying to keep things new and unique. I don't doubt that he loves you. ... (read in full...)
Are his different ways of saying "I love you" ways to show that he's playing me?
Q. Hi, um.......I know that this topic may seem irrelevant or small but honestly I just want some opinions. My boyfriend has been with me now for 2 years this coming september 27th. All this time he's been showing his love with his actions which I ...
A. 8 September 2011: I think that he is just using text talk because that is how the conversation has gone so far. In person does he say he loves you? Through text I think you might as well make it cuter and a little more fun rather than just saying "I love you" because ... (read in full...)
Is this really so wrong?
Q. I am seeing my first cousin in secret. We messed around in high school for a spell and recently hooked back up. We truly care deeply for each other. To the world we realize that this is wrong but we dont feel wrong about it. I can no longer have ...
A. 8 September 2011: Well if you have the law on your side then you really have to do what makes you happy. ... (read in full...)
Tips on how to ask a girl out!
Q. Hi everyone, I fancy a girl in my school. We are very good friends and she does know a lot about my past. I am considering to ask her to be my girlfriend. This is not my first time asking a girl out but the last two times failed and I don'...
A. 7 September 2011: I think it really helps to figure out what you want to do for a date and know what day you want to go. This way she knows all the details instead of just saying "would you want to go out sometime." ... (read in full...)
Is it normally to feel physically sick after a break up?
Q. Is it normal to feel ill, after being hurt in your relationship i nearly split up with my boyfriend tonight, and i started shaking feeling sick, going cold it felt like i had the flu. I had a cup of tea at the side of me and could hardly pick it up ...
A. 7 September 2011: Yes it is quite possible. Your mind goes through alot when you go through a really rough patch. I have gone through some bad relationships and for me I tend lose my appetite. If it doesn't get better in a few days then it would be good to go to a ... (read in full...)
I am 18 seeing a man double my age. Do I tell my mom or let things ride?
Q. Hi guys i really need your opinion on what to do. I have been seeing this guy who's going to be turning 37 this October, i am 18 turning to 19 next year February. I don't care about the age difference because we talked about it and we are cool with ...
A. 1 September 2011: Well, the way I see it is that you have two choices here. The first is that you don't tell her and you will have to lie and sneak around to see him until your mom does find out and things most likely won't go well. But if you do wait it out you may ... (read in full...)
My fiancee's promiscuous past disgusts me.
Q. Cupid, my wife to be has a promiscuous past, am having second thoughts as am a virgin.am not insecure am just disgusted with how she lived her life. Should i stay or let her down gently...
A. 31 August 2011: If you can't get past it then yes you should leave her and find someone else. Her past doesn't make her the person that she is today but some people let it get to them far too much. The thing that I find odd is that you married her already so I am ... (read in full...)
I've been talking online with a 30 year old woman who wants to go out with me!
Q. Hello there everyone i could use some advice. Ive been talking online with this woman she is 30 years old. We have been talking for about a month or so and do not live far away from each other. I have talked to her on webcam so i know she is who ...
A. 30 August 2011: Your age says 16-17 so no it is not actually legal unless you are 18. I say don't go for it. She can promise so much to you and things can go really bad really fast. You need to find someone closer to your own age, you two are pretty much in two ... (read in full...)
Is it possible for us to not have sex for the 4-5 years before we get married?
Q. Hi! Here's my problem.i and my bf have been dating for 8 months now and we have not had sex with each other.i'm a virgin but he is not.we agreed not to have sex until we are married which could be in 4-5 years time.we only only have make out ...
A. 30 August 2011: For it to work it really has to be something you both beleive in. If only one of you is for it and the other one is just going along with it then it will come through in time. Then either the relationship ends or the person who wanted to wait till ... (read in full...)
Insecurity problems because of my previous relationship
Q. Hey guys, im going to start school again in a few days and would like some relationship advice. I had my first girlfriend last year and really liked her but we broke up because she liked this other guy. Anyways Since then i find that i cant really ...
A. 29 August 2011: What you have to realize is that when you start a new relationship your old gf doesn't play a part in it. You should only take with you the positive things you have learned from the past relationships and start fresh with someone. When you meet a ... (read in full...)
Reading other's texts--snooping? or confirmation?
Q. I am curious to know what other people's opinions are with reading each others texts when you should have nothing to hide? I seem to look at the topic from anoter point of view or maybe I am just right?? help ...
A. 29 August 2011: In general I think it is abad idea because if it becomes a habit and there is a text you don't want your partner to see, such as a surprise party (not necessarily a bad thing) and they get really suspicious why you don't want them to see it. I think ... (read in full...)
Made my boyfriend cum by lying on top of him?
Q. I made my boyfriend cum, and he said it was because i was on top of him, (we were just kissing) and i didnt think a boy could cum from just being on top of him. Or is there something else to it? ...
A. 29 August 2011: He just got excited. It tends to happen at that age when sexual things start happening. You may have been moving slightly and it means he was really turned on by the kissing. I wouldn't say that it is a bad thing. ... (read in full...)
Cant stop thinking about the married man who is 30 years older to me!
Q. I met a married man who is 30 years older than me and has a child the same age as me. He lives in a different city in a different state. After a long flight back together I can't stop thinking about him yet he feels nothing of the sort for me and ...
A. 28 August 2011: Your best bet is probably to do the hard thing and just let him be. I have no problem with age differences but thirty years is a bit much and he is married with a life together already. No matter what your age is it isn't right to get in the way of ... (read in full...)
I don't want to keep it a secret that I'm bi, but will men be ok with me if they know?
Q. I am 18 years old and bisexual, even if not completely 50 / 50. A few people know, and the truth is bound to have spread a little. I don't want to be attention seeking and make a big deal of it, but then again, hate hiding it. Will male friends and ...
A. 25 August 2011: I think people who don't know you very well will be a little awkward with this. It is not something you should have to hide at all but I do think it is something that those people do not need to know right away. ... (read in full...)
Can masturbating too often be harmful?
Q. I do masturbate 4 times daily - is it harmful?...
A. 24 August 2011: No, it's not harmful. It can be a problem if you start to have to do it and it is affecting the rest of your life. For example if you leave your friends to masturbate or have a need to do it in public. Other than that it's a good stress releiver and ... (read in full...)
Can I date several men at the same time?
Q. need help from females After several years with the same man it appears the relationship is not going to move forward in any way. Id like to know if its is normal for a woman to date several guys at one time and how do I go about doing this. ...
A. 23 August 2011: I think that it is perfectly reasonable to date multiple people at the same time. The biggest thing is that they all have to know that those are just dates and that it is not an exclusive thing. Maybe seeing other people will help you appreciate ... (read in full...)
Dating a friend's ex?
Q. Ok this is a question for a friend of mine. Basically He likes his friends Ex girlfriend. They met up last week and were snogging and chatting loads. they are secretly texting each other and the ex boyfriend doesn't know anything about it. He sti...
A. 23 August 2011: I would say it is a no go zone unless the ex/friend says that it is ok. Otherwise your friend will mostly likely lose the friendship he has. His choices are pretty much this:
-give the relationship up and keep the friendship
-go out with her and ... (read in full...)
I do drugs, smoke and drink to relieve boredom. I want help to stop before I ruin my life
Q. Hi :) I'm asking this because im starting to get a bit worried. Im generally a sensible person, but I dont (in my view) have a very exciting life and sometimes I feel really trapped and I have to go out and do something that I wouldn't usually do. ...
A. 22 August 2011: You have to find something to occupy your time. Maybe some new friends as well. Look for group activities, sports or maybe a martial art to give you something to do. The biggest thing is the people you surround yourself with. If you have to be drunk ... (read in full...)
Anyone understand the reasoning behind making high schoolers wake up so early?
Q. This really isn't a good dear cupid question but i have no where else to ask this. Does anyone know why they make high school students wake up so early as opposed to middle schoolers and elementary school students? In my school district, th...
A. 22 August 2011: They do have to stagger the schools start times so that the limited number of buses can get everyone to school and it keeps the traffic down. There isn't really a good reason why you would start that early. I have had to get up that early for ... (read in full...)
Should I wait until my boyfriend gets out of prison to tell him I want to break up?
Q. So in a very complicated relationship. I have been with my bf for almost six years. He has been in prison for a year now and will be eligable for house arrest soon to live with me. I love him, always will but think we should have broken up a long ...
A. 22 August 2011: I think you definitely need to tell him ahead of time so he has an arranged place for him to go. I don't think the courts would like it if he went to your address and had to change it so soon after being released. ... (read in full...)
My boyfriend is too quiet in bed! Is this normal?
Q. My new boyfriend is so damn quiet in bed that I dont even know when he orgasms. This is becoming quite embaressing because I keep going and I dont realise that he has already come. There is no noise, no movement, no facial expression, no nothing. ...
A. 20 August 2011: Some people are naturally quite in bed. It is something he could work on for you but I doubt he will ever be very loud. ... (read in full...)
Could he still have access to my computer?
Q. Hi all I hope there is somebody here who can help me. A few years back I met a guy online, he was a compter wizard and I was having problems with my pc- we were talking through msn at the time and he asked my permission to somehow look through ...
A. 20 August 2011: When you let him in initially he would have had access to anything you had on the computer but you would have been able to see it. As of now he most likely does not have access to your computer. Unless he has illagally hacked in for him to get in ... (read in full...)
I'm 22, she's 15 is it best to stop before things get started?
Q. I started talking to this girl recently, she seemed really nice, really pretty. Then one day we find out how old each other is, she thought I was 17, I'm 22, and I thought she was 18, the girl is 15. Nothing has happened for it to be a legal matte...
A. 20 August 2011: Although I'm not against the age gap because I know plenty of successful relationships with similar age gaps it is the timing that is the downfall here. I think you two are just in too different of worlds aside from the legal issues I am sure you ... (read in full...)
My ex lied and told me she had a miscarriage and now she wants child support!
Q. My ex girlfriend lied to me and said that she had a miscarriage but really didn't. She told me the baby had trisomy 18 and my sperm were defective and I'd never be able to have children. Can I sue her for emotional distress i experienced because of ...
A. 20 August 2011: I would definitely see a lawyer for this one. You may have to pay child support and I do beleive that you should have to pay for the child if it is yours but that doesn't change the fact that her behaviour was manipulative. The child deserves the ... (read in full...)
Girlfriend says I'm rude on the phone
Q. Sooo my girlfriend gets pissed at me when i yawn or stretch when im on the phone with her. She says im getting annoyed and bored with her when i am not at all!!! And another thing is she will say baby? And ill say what? And shes like u dont need to ...
A. 20 August 2011: That's pretty bad for an over reaction. Explain to her that you aren't bored with her, it is most likely caused because you would sit in one spot and talk to her. I yawn while working out and moving, it's just your body needing an extra oxygen ... (read in full...)
I've fallen for a friend who has a rotten boyfriend
Q. I have this friend who's in a relationship with a guy. And the guy she's with ignores her and blames all of the problems on her. I'm trying to tell her it's not her fault. She also tells me she likes me (as more then just a friend) to because I ...
A. 18 August 2011: Be a good friend to her and if you like her there is no harm in flirting and giving her hints that you are into her. It sounds like she is looking for a reason to leave her bf and you could be it.
If you make it known to her that you are inte... (read in full...)
I lied to the guy online and don't know what to do
Q. This is not a real dating issue, it's more like an issue that I have with myself, but I'd really appreciate it if you could take some time and help me out with this. I met a great guy online, some 5 months ago. We didn't meet on a dating website o...
A. 18 August 2011: You should really tell him how old you actually are and see what happens then. With him being that old he will mostly likely end it there for legal and moral reasons. It has nothing to do with you but you are way better off meeting boys your own age ... (read in full...)
How do you get over someone you truly loved?
Q. Me and my boyfriend are on and of we love each other, weve been dating for six months but hes said that hes going through alot and we need a break, well anyways im in eighth grade going to ninth im really hurt and my family and friends keep telling ...
A. 16 August 2011: I don't think you ever get over the your first love. What I have found is that as you get on with your life your definition of love changes and you realize that what you and your ex had was special at the time but wasn't what it takes to hve a more ... (read in full...)
Is this really so wrong?
Q. I am seeing my first cousin in secret. We messed around in high school for a spell and recently hooked back up. We truly care deeply for each other. To the world we realize that this is wrong but we dont feel wrong about it. I can no longer have ...
A. 2 June 2011: I think there is far more to consider here then the bible. As far as I know sex is technically illegal but I don't knwo how well the law holds up when you are unable to have children. My second concern is how your family would take it if they knew. ... (read in full...)
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