| Latest articles: Women and Men: Being Equal
This question has 5 answers by readers of DearCupid.ORG.
Newest answer was posted
22 January 2011: When your in a relationship, either married or dating I think it is safe to say that equality in that relationship is a very good thing. I'm interested in seeing what everyone can come up with for equality points in a relationship. I'm not really ...
Lost puppy effect.
This question has 4 answers by readers of DearCupid.ORG.
Newest answer was posted
7 September 2010: With a friend of mine going through a break up at the moment I have noticed the common behavior of her bf which I want to call the lost puppy effect. Some back ground on the situation is that she broke up with him and is moving on and going through ...
To break up or not to break up? That is the question.
This question has 4 answers by readers of DearCupid.ORG.
Newest answer was posted
23 February 2010: This article is inspired by two friends of mine who are together in a relationship and its for all those men and women who think that they want to end their realationship but don't quite know yet. All relationships hit rocky patches where you have...
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Can 13 year-olds find a lasting relationship, or is this just puppy love?
Q. Ok... know a lot of you will disagree with my view on this but oh well...I'm 13, and I have a boyfriend of 8 months, we really get along and we have almost everything in common, he told me he loved me and I told him I loved him too but then i felt ...
A. 14 March 2012: To be honest it is unlikely but not impossible at all. I don't have any personal evidence that it can happen but I do believe that it can in some cases. You just have to take it day by day and see where it takes you. That way even if it does end you ... (read in full...)
If my husband doesn't want to have sex with me as much- does that mean he is not attracted to me??
Q. If my husband doesn't want to have sex with me as much- does that mean he is not attracted to me??...
A. 10 March 2012: That may be the case but it may also be him. Some may be quick to say that he is cheating or something like that but judging based on the age maybe he is developing some sort of erectile dysfunction and he is too embaressed to bring it up. I would ... (read in full...)
I led her on and feel horrible now.
Q. I Dated this girl for about 2 months and things weren't going too well for us mainly because she had had a rough past growing up and in past relationships. There always seemed to be something going on and she was massively depressed a lot ...
A. 8 March 2012: I think you should give her a clean break and try to leave with her feeling in the right here. Then never talk to her again. That way she can move on with her life and you can too. You admit you made a mistake and now you can correct it the best ... (read in full...)
Could a girl ever accept my love of supermodels?
Q. Ok, I like supermodels and always have. Not the big-boobed, blonde bimbos in men's magazines but the high fashion models. When magazines like Vogue or Photo have their "Top Models" issue, I get it. If there's an interview with a model I like, I'll ...
A. 6 March 2012: By the way you come across with this interest I don't get the vibe that you these women are just sexual objects to you. I get the impression that you enjoy the whole idea of and career of a supermodel which is what would make this ok with someone. ... (read in full...)
After 1.5 year of planning trip now g/f says she wants us to go separately and she's going with a male friend
Q. My girlfriend and I have been planning on hiking the appalachian trail together for the past year and a half. The departure time is getting close, so 2 weeks ago she tells me that she wants to hike the trail separately now. That consists of me going ...
A. 6 March 2012: I would tell her that is something that you had wanted to do together and that you won't be doing it if it is not going to be as such. If she can't see that it obviously means something to you then I would be thinking over why you are with her and ... (read in full...)
How can I make him see that he is disgusting and needs to lose weight?
Q. I have been married to my husband for almost 25 years and we have 4 children. When we got married I weighed 135 and he weighed 180. We looked and felt great. We did alot of outdoor activities. Now I am at 160 and he is about 310. He is fat! I can ...
A. 1 March 2012: It is a very touchy subject and I think it should be something you two do together so that no one is blaming the other. Sorry for the bluntness but it is not like you are in the best shape either and he will probably get mad and call you out on that ... (read in full...)
Can you explain how a guy dates many girls at one? Are there any feelings involved?
Q. I guess this is a question for guys. Why do some guys like to date many girls? I just don't understand how and why they do it. How about the feelings? Do you like one girl better than the other one and so forth? or how do you manage this? Do ...
A. 1 March 2012: There are definitely feelings involved but none of them are love yet. When someone dates multiple people at once it is like sorting through matches on a dating site. You don't do it one at a time, you go through groups hoping that you find someone ... (read in full...)
Can a woman propose to her boyfriend?
Q. In this day and age, is it completely out of line for a woman to propose to a man?...
A. 28 February 2012: Not at all. I think at this day an age most of the gender barriers have been broken which is a really good thing. Best of luck to you!... (read in full...)
Do you think it's prostitution to be a dominatrix? Any thoughts?
Q. OK here's a question up for debate, not asking for help just your views on the subject. Random I know lol. DOMINATRIX Do you think it's prostitution to be a dominatrix woman/man. ( for anyone who dont know what that is, it's where someone...
A. 25 February 2012: Well there is definitely something sexual involved whether it is there for you or not but I would not consider it to be a form of prostitution.
Even if you are getting paid for the sexual satisfication of someone else you may not see anything more... (read in full...)
Can someone's hugs show how they feel about you? :)
Q. Hello :) I'm friends with the boy I like and we always hug goodbye. Lately,his hugs have been different. When I hug him he holds me really tight and he grabs my head and pushes my head against his chest and puts his fingers through my hair. ...
A. 25 February 2012: I think you can tell alot about what the person is thinking by the way they hug you or any other physical interaction. From that sort of hug I would say that he likes you as more then just a friend. It definitely shows that he cares about you alot ... (read in full...)
What is harassment?
Q. If a girl breaks up with a bloke and stops communication and does not tell him exactly why, is it harassment to continue to write to the girl over email every few days to find out why? I mean if she does not answer, when is it considered harassment?...
A. 24 February 2012: I would say it becomes harrassment when the messages become threatening or angry in some way. If you are sending messages asking why which I would assume to be in a sad tone then I think it would take many months before anyone would even look into ... (read in full...)
I'm being bullied at work by my boss who is also my husband!
Q. This sounds mad I know, but I am being bullied at work. The trouble is its my boss (who is also my husband) We have not been married long (6 months) and worked together for years before this and never had any trouble. I dont know what to do, he c...
A. 21 February 2012: I would make anonymous contact with his superior to comment on his treatment of the employees. If you two are in your own business then I would make this very clear to him that you can and will file harassment charges if he continues this. Hopefully ... (read in full...)
My little sister is flirting with a guy I like. How do I deal with that?
Q. Okay soo there this guy i school I hadnt really ever spoken to much before, but recently i started talking to him more because we have a class together this semester. He's a pretty cool guy, funny, really smart too. I also like the fact that he like...
A. 20 February 2012: I would be honest with your sister and say that you like the guy before she developes any feelings for him. Hopefully she respects that but if not you may have to take the other approach which is to win the guy over. This could be done by making ... (read in full...)
Do I suggest our St Valentines day outing first, or wait for her to text me?
Q. So, I've been on two dates with a girl now, last week Sunday and Friday this week. The first was good, walk and coffee, last around 4 hours. Second we played snooker, then had dinner, Chinese, her favourite. I chose the second, she did the firs...
A. 12 February 2012: I definitely agree that you should give her a call and see if she would want to go out on valentine's day. It sounds to me that she is hinting on it and is waiting for you to ask. She will be far happier if you come out and ask. ... (read in full...)
Is masturbation harmful to a man around 80 years old??
Q. is masterbation harmful for an old man,say 80 years old? ...
A. 11 February 2012: It's not harmful at all. I will be just thrilled if I don't have any problems in that aspect at that age. ... (read in full...)
Black specks in underware mean?
Q. Black specks in my husband briefs after washing; what does that mean if anything?...
A. 30 January 2012: I would definitely say it was something that you washed them with. I am guessing this was just a one time thing. That is quite strange though but I doubt it is anything to worry about. ... (read in full...)
If a guy wants you for sex but not a girlfriend does it mean you're ugly?
Q. He said it was because we live too far apart and I accepted that. Now he's dating a girl who lives near him but still wants to sleep with me. He calls me "hot" etc I've told him to leave me alone. I feel ugly :(...
A. 28 January 2012: I would say that it means it is the complete opposite. He is physically attracted to you but doesn't want a relationship. Personally I think that it is good that he is at least honest and didn't try to build a relationship and then only want sex. ... (read in full...)
Porn woes!
Q. Looking for a male perspective; in the throes of a wonderful new relationship and I'm the happiest I've been for years. The emotional side of the relationship is perfect and the physical side the same. I'm very open-minded!! The only niggle I have ...
A. 24 January 2012: I don't doubt that he is unhappy at all with you. Porn is just his fantasy alone time. It has nothing to do with you. Everyone is entitled to their alone time and unless the porn was directly impacting your relationship I don't see why it would be a ... (read in full...)
I'm not 'out' yet but I want to tell him I like him!
Q. I have a crush on this guy but I don't know if he is gay. Me and him sit by each other in class and we mess with each other all the time and I started to like him. Over the weekend I went to his Facebook page and I wanted to see his pictures so I ...
A. 22 January 2012: I would say you are correct about the fb profile. He wouldn't put that up there unless it was some sort of dare.
For most things I don't think text is the best option but in this case I would text him and tell him that you like him and want to know... (read in full...)
Why don't men read maps?
Q. Why is it that when your in a car and your man is Driving and you both are in an unfamilliar town, he wont Admit that he is Lost. My Question is why wont men ask for Directions? ...
A. 16 January 2012: For starters this totally relates to the question of why do men always have to be right. I think that is the case when a guy won't ask for directions if because he is determined to show that he can do it on his own. There is an emphasis on males to ... (read in full...)
I'm so annoyed with my mom and sister!
Q. At my school, in about a month, we will have "freshman formal" (a formal dance for only freshman). Everyone is getting dates, buying dresses, and everyone is really excited. I didn't get asked and I'm fine with it, my best friend's boyfriend is on ...
A. 10 January 2012: You wouldn't be called a lesbian for that. When you get older the majority of bar goers go in groups of the same sex. You should go with your friends and have a great time.
I think that they are saying this because it sounds like your mom is very... (read in full...)
How many dates should you go on before having sex?
Q. After how many dates is it ok to have sex with someone?...
A. 9 January 2012: I think it really depends on what kind of relationship you want with the person. If you have sex right away it is more likely that will be the focus of the relationship. That is not a gaurantee but it is a general trend.
As for a timeline it all ... (read in full...)
Why do guys grab a girl's waist?
Q. What does it mean when a guy keeps grabbing your waist? Like they will sit there and squeeze your waist? I know it sounds weird, but this guy kept doing it and I couldn't understand why or what he was doing it for, this isn't the first, time quite a ...
A. 1 January 2012: That to me says that the are sexually interested in you. They are expressing that they are into you and want to get close to you. Other then sexual interest it doesn't really say much else. ... (read in full...)
What do people think of an 18 year old guy dating a 16 year old?
Q. ok i have been talking to a girl who is 16 and i'm 18 we have basically got straight on and i feel like i have known her for years and we both have basically shown we like each others personallity and like each other. id like to ask her out and ...
A. 1 January 2012: It's fine as long as you are dating her for the right reasons. Two years is such a small age difference that when she is 18 and you would be 20 you probably wouldn't even notice. I'm 21 and started dated someone who is 17 and it is great. There are ... (read in full...)
I don't have feelings for my girlfriend and feel guilty because of my real intentions behind having a relationship with her. What should I do?
Q. Recently,on dating site, I have got 42 years old American woman interested in me and it's been two weeks since we have expressed love for each other.I'm 30 years old. She has 11 years old daughter from her first love who left here 6 years ago. She...
A. 31 December 2011: That's a really tough decision because on one hand you do have good intentions in that you want to help your family out and I am sure that it would be a big help. On the other hand you would be hurting this family.
Although it is terrible that you ... (read in full...)
Do guys dump shy girls?
Q. guys!is it true that a guy would dump a girl is she's shy to make the first move or anything?but some girls can be like that because all they wanna do is talk or go out not make out at his house everytime they're alone?...
A. 29 December 2011: Personally I find shy girls very attractive but there does have to be some sort of balance between the physical and emotional sides of the relationship. I wouldn't stay with a girl if she never wanted or never showed that she was interested in me ... (read in full...)
What really hurts a guy aside from breakups?
Q. This question is mainly directed to Men but feel free anyone to answer every little helps :) After a friend got dumped we went to her house to comfort her. She said she wanted to hurt her ex emotionally. I told her not to stoop to his level but my...
A. 28 December 2011: There are many issues with this. One is that you may not be able to hurt him because guys just tend to be less emotional. Two is that you are most likely going to watch your friend get crushed over this because he will find far more to hurt her with ... (read in full...)
How do you know if you love someone?
Q. How do you know if you love someone?...
A. 28 December 2011: It's just a strong feeling that tends to be very confusing. Everyone will have a different feeling but yet they all mean love. I would call it the feeling you have that you can't fully describe, that's when you know that it is special. ... (read in full...)
Do guys hate skinny girls?
Q. i am 22 years old and am very skinny i really wanna have a big ass and am losing my confidence and stoped getting out with guys tried eating alot but have no apetite please tell me u'r opinion do guys really hate skiny girls. Thanx in advance...
A. 27 December 2011: I like skinny girls but they have to be the active skinny ones not the ones who do nothing and are skinny because they don't eat. I prefer a smaller chest and butt so yes there are guys out there for you. ... (read in full...)
I was sneaky about meeting up with an ex, but it was only as friends and now I don't know what my boyfriend suspects!
Q. Is hanging out with an ex a terrible deed? this is an ex of mine from 4.5 years ago, the one prior to my current boyfriend of 4 years. It wasn't even really a relatonship, it was more fwb. but it ended because i found myself developing feelings ...
A. 22 December 2011: You have every right to see these people from your past but because you hid it from him you look like you have something to hide. I would be suspicious too if I found out my gf secretly met up with her ex no matter how long ago the relationship was. ... (read in full...)
My girlfriend after 5 years says she doesn't know if she wants to be with me. Is it time to move on?
Q. After almost 5 years my girlfriend says she still doesnt know if she wants to be with me! Personally i dont think she does want to be with me but is too scared to say it, and ive thought this for past 3 years. She also says she needs me in her life, ...
A. 22 December 2011: It sounds like it is time to move on. It's tough but it is the best thing for you to go find love instead of just waiting for the relationship wo go south. You also have to choose whether you still want her in your life or if it would just be best ... (read in full...)
Boyfriend needs a rather large loan. What to do? Help!
Q. My 24 year old boyfriend took out a loan to get some repairs done on his car, without realizing that he would have to change his insurance to be eligible for the loan. Now he's paying double what he would pay for car insurance AND an extra $50 per ...
A. 22 December 2011: Generally it is a bad idea because money ruins relationships fast. A contract is a must if you do loan him money no matter what kind of guy he is.
If I were in your position I would not loan him the money. Being a university student myself I know... (read in full...)
Have you ever gotten to the end of your teenaged years and realized you didn't do anything?
Q. I'm actually quite annoyed at myself, i'm 19 and i don't feel like i've lived my teenage life to the fullest! I haven't slept with anyone.. STILL. I haven't experimented or at least tried one drug, something even small such as weed. I haven't had a ...
A. 22 December 2011: Why would you care just about sleeping with someone or trying drugs. That sounds like a way to waste away your teenage years. There has to be more to your past then just what you are saying you haven't done.
The thing I miss most from my past was ... (read in full...)
Is it important to have things in common when you date?
Q. Everyone I've dated, and people that have shown interest in me have never shared anything in common with me. Personality, hobbies, likes, interests etc... I was seeing someone for a little over a month and that ended because we had little i...
A. 22 December 2011: I would say it is one of the most important things to keep in mind. If you two have nothing in common then what is the relationship? It would just be sex then I guess.
I don't think I would even last a month with someone I had nothing in comm... (read in full...)
I have sexual feelings for men as well as women, am I bi?
Q. I am 18 and have always had some sexual feelings towards men as well as women. I assumed everybody goes through this as a teenager, although the feelings are still there. I am sure I will be marrying a woman eventually as my feeling for females is ...
A. 15 December 2011: You may be bi but this alone doesn't really say it. Most people, more then would admit it, have these thoughts at some point in your life and it is just part of you figuring out who you are inside. ... (read in full...)
How can I stop being bitchy?
Q. I've been really bitchy lately and its really making my boyfriend upset..its all because I've been unhappy about the place that we live in. I'm sooo fed up with our roomates! Their so filthy and lazy and they have nasty animal that they won't clean ...
A. 15 December 2011: If you can't move out right away I would let the room mates have it for being that way then take some time to be selfish and do something for yourself and possibly your boyfriend. Even just a night at a hotel to get away would help.
A little time... (read in full...)
How do I handle the fact that family are not taking our wedding plans seriously? He's 28 and I'm 22.,
Q. I'm 22, and my fiance is 28, We've been together for 2 years. We're both in school, and I'll be moving away to University in a couple months. We decided to hold off getting married until he graduates (about 2 years), as I'll be in school for a long ...
A. 15 December 2011: Well it is good that you have a long time to plan the wedding but I do have to ask what the rush is? Wouldn't you want to be done school as well? I mean it isn't for everyone and you can't put a time limit on life so if you feel ready then you have ... (read in full...)
Did I lower my image and my standards?
Q. I dont know if what I did was wrong. I dont like this girl at all. not even a little bit. I just wanted to have sex. I know that sounds kinda the guy image but it was kinda already understood that we were going too.. but now i feel like shit ...
A. 15 December 2011: One action doesn't determine who we are as a person because if that were the case then we would all be horrible people. You obviously just wanted someone to be close to you for that moment and as long as she isn't hurt or led on then you both are ... (read in full...)
(Should / How Can) I tell my second cousin I miss her? (Family Love)
Q. Alright I've been posting around that I like my second cousin and on how beautiful she is. Here's the main story on what happened what I posted before to get a understanding of it: http://www.dearcupid.org/quest...
A. 12 December 2011: If you miss her then give her a call sometime during the day when you figure she will most likely be able to talk. I understand how you feel. I hadn't seen a cousin of mine for about 7 years and ending up getting her cell number so I sent her a text ... (read in full...)
Is this a relationship red flag?
Q. Is it a red flag if a guy only seems interested in you when he is own his own i.e. when his guy friends arent there?...
A. 10 December 2011: What that says to me is that he is not himself either when he is with you or with his friends. I wouldn't put up with it and would most likely call him out on it, then expect the relationship to end.
His friends may not like you very much and he i... (read in full...)
Can't break up even though I know its best. Advice?
Q. I am coming here for help in a really hard time and need support/advice. My boyfriend and I have dated for 2 1/2 years and i found out he lied twice about going out to the bar and then went a third time and got a girls number there asking her...
A. 8 December 2011: Somethings you just have to do and worry later. If you stay with him it will most likely ruin the season for you and then there will just be more excuses.
When you see him just tell him you're breaking up with him and then leave. You don't need... (read in full...)
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