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... Send *meedle a private message | | | *meedle's profile:51yrs old, have a 25yr old son. Live in North Wales and love it.
I have lived through many different experiences in my life, some happy and some traumatic. I am single and have been for 7yrs. I have lots of animals including a horse and sheep.
I work with people that are homeless, have mental illness or learning disability, ex offenders, substance misuse issues, self harm, low self esteem, fleeing domestic abuse, families going through difficulties, parents with children who are having difficulties. I work in supported housing so see all these issues regularity and work with agencies to get some help if I cannot help. |
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We broke up, but I can't deal with this ending after 3 years
Q. My g/f of 3 years broke it off about a month ago b/c she said she was uphappy...like everyone else here, she said she loves me, wants things to work, ect..but is not ready for the relationship we had..we went back and forth talking for a few ...
A. 9 March 2006: YOu know it is over but you are hanging onto false hope, well she is not at all interested and has to all intents and purpose moved on.
I know it is hard to accept that she loved you then she did not love you, she obviously had a think about the ... (read in full...)
I found a condom in his wallet and I think he lied about what it was for
Q. Hi, I am 23 years old and have been with my fiance for about 4 years. We have had our problems but I thought we were doing ok. I am pregnant, due any day now. Last night I was doing laundry and my fiance had his wallet in a pair of pants that needed ...
A. 9 March 2006: I have to agree with the advice willywombat gave as sadly I too think he is lying and if he has not slept with this girl then he intends to.
I wish I could tell you that it is just a prank with his mates and that if he was sleeping with the girl... (read in full...)
My man waited until I had an affair before becoming a better husband!
Q. I have been married for 13 years, of which 10 of those years my husband has not physically been attracked to me. We have a great marriage other than that. At first we still had physical contact hugs, kisses, and hand holding, etc. But about three ...
A. 9 March 2006: Go for it with the new romance, forget the colour of his skin and ignore any comments others may make, if anyone deserved an intimate loving relationship it is you.
Your husband woke up to the fact that other men find you attractive and now it is t... (read in full...)
Thinking of getting a wax but worried I'll be too hair "back there" - am I a freak?
Q. I want to get a Brazilian wax. I would have no problem going if i didnt feel like im the only one with hair all the way "back there". Is this normal ? I dont want to look like a fool in front of the waxer....
A. 9 March 2006: Go for it, you will be fine and you will feel a lot better in yourself.
The first time for anything is always the worst so go and make that appointment.... (read in full...)
Is he really such an innocent, shy little thing... Or not?
Q. Hi There, I have a wee problem!!! I have been with my boyfriend for 4 years now. When I met him I had come out of a long term relationship, of 4 years and he had been single for quite a long time. In saying that I don't mean he hadn't had a wom...
A. 9 March 2006: You are worrying about nothing, the guy loves you and wants to marry you and if it was`nt for this one thing you would be marrying him like a shot.
We never tell our new partners everything and to say that you have had a lot of partners would put ... (read in full...)
Why do guys stare and laugh?
Q. Hi, I'm just a little confused about something. I find that sometimes guys will stare at me or when there is a group of guys they will stare at me, and there sometimes smiling and talking. And when I walk past I hear laughing. Does this mean they ...
A. 9 March 2006: I think that you are becoming slightly paranoid, they are just a group of blokes as hopeful says.
They are probably thinking how sexy you look.
Men stare at me, and believe me I am nothing to stare at, but if im out on the street and pass a group ... (read in full...)
My masturbation habits are preventing me from having an orgasm with a partner!
Q. Hi. I am really worried about something. I've been masturbating since I was very young (I always remember doing it, although at the time I didn't know what it was, just that it felt good). Anyway, I did it by laying on my stomach and pushing on my ...
A. 9 March 2006: You need to experiment with positions, there are lots of different ones and one will make you orgasm, so get practicing and enjoy the practice.
It seems to me that you may have it fixed in your head that pushing on your vagina is the only way you ... (read in full...)
Our relationship was getting stale, but I was devastated when she wanted to break us up!
Q. I've been with my gf for a li'll more than six years or so. And I must confess that I've taken her for granted many times. In this relationship, I am the stronger link, I was the one making the decisions etc. We're both 24 by the way. Lately, I find ...
A. 9 March 2006: You liked it when you were in controle of the relationship, this time she has agreed with you when you said the relationship had troubles and for once she has become strong and in controle and how you hate this!!
Well let look at the facts shal... (read in full...)
I cheated in my mind, and my husband is angry and hurt...
Q. I cheated on my husband and brought him home in my mind and fucked my husband thinking of the other guy. He is extremely hurt and I destroyed his self confidence and dignity. He feels small and worthless in a sexual way. I don't want to lose him but ...
A. 9 March 2006: Why on earth did you tell him, what did you think telling him would achieve.
You have really hurt him and this will take a long time to mend, you have some seriouse making up to do but you also need to look at why you did what you did.
What ... (read in full...)
After a month, how do I know if I really love him?
Q. My boyfriend and I have been dating for almost a month now. We're both trying to take it slow, we've had bad relationships in the past and we both are trying to make this work and not make the mistakes we've made in our past relationships. WE want a ...
A. 8 March 2006: I have been in and out of love all my life, you are not too young to fall in love and if this is not true love it is pretty close.
Loving someone is not an exact science, we all love family, friends, pets, etc but loving someone who you are goin... (read in full...)
We're going on our second date, any ideas?
Q. I would like some ideas... I had a first date with this guy that just went ok, not great not bad (mostly because we were both nervous). He wants to go out again and I determined to make it a great one! What can I do to make it a fun, better time?Or ...
A. 8 March 2006: Go somewhere that you can have a laugh but not be so intense, like ice skating, cinema or dancing.
If you go ice skating you are going to be helped by him and you will have a laugh. If you go to the cinema you will be able to just sit and hold hand... (read in full...)
Any tips for dealing with an uncircumucised willy?
Q. i've only ever been with circumcised boys, but my new bf isn't. i want to go down on him, but i'm not sure how it's different. i was always pretty good at giving hand jobs to my other boyfriends, but it's hard for me to make him come with just my ...
A. 8 March 2006: Not much difference when hard, just appearance when soft, so dont worry about it.
Not sure why it is difficult to make him come with your hand , this maybe something to do with him and not you so dont worry.
... (read in full...)
I'm sweet 17 and never been kissed! Any tips?
Q. I have never kissed a guy and im 17! I am very embarrased about this, especially considering i have had 2 boyfriends and we never kissed. ONe of the relationship went on for 7 months and nothing happened, I guess we were both to shy. Anyway, I have ...
A. 8 March 2006: You are about to do what comes natural and we all do it and enjoy it.
You need to relax and follow his lead,
he has had more experience than you but he will never guess this when you relax and do what comes natural, he will think you have been kis... (read in full...)
How do we spice things back up?
Q. I have been in a relationship for almost four years now. We got together when I was 16 and she was 15. We are now 18 and 19, and there is really no excitement or conversation. It's so sad because we are at the age to have fun, and we are like a sad ...
A. 8 March 2006: Why are you bothering to try and spice it up, it looks well dead to me, if I was you I would be looking to break up not spice up.
Take a seriouse look at the relationship, what are you getting from it and why are you together, do you have any long... (read in full...)
I want more confidence so I can ask out this girl I'd like to go out with
Q. Hey there DearCupid Fans. Im 15, and the girl I'd like to go out with is 14-15. She's in the year below and lives down the end of my street, thing is she goes to a different and rougher school, and hangs about with rougher people and people who have ...
A. 8 March 2006: I would really like to tell you to steer clear of her, you are opening yourself up to all the things you mentioned but I guess that is not what you want to hear so:-
Ask her for a date, take her somewhere that her mates are not likely to follow her ... (read in full...)
Her boyfriends in another country and she's really confusing me!!!
Q. i started a relationship with a girl that has already got a boyfriend. her boyfriend is in another country and it is going to stay like that for over a year. it started a few months ago, and we tried to ignore our feelings and just be friends. ...
A. 8 March 2006: Give her an ultimatum, she is playing with you and you are letting her, has she really finished with the boyfriend or is she just telling you this.
Tell her that you want a full on relationship with her and that this half hearted commitment is not ... (read in full...)
My boyfriend's family hates me and I can't handle much longer!
Q. im so pissed off that my boyfriend's family hates me we did get on, now i can't even bring myself to even go to his house or even phone his house phone!!!! wot can i do???? i am only in my middle teens but i know that this boy is the one for me, i ...
A. 8 March 2006: It is not his family you are dating and so you need to avoid them or grow a thick skin.... (read in full...)
My hubby is getting nudie pics of women from a friend...
Q. my husband keeps recieving e-mails from a friend of naked woman in various poses,he hides this from me and it is making me feel insecure,we are in our late forties and he doesnt want to talk about anything with a sexual nature to me but has no ...
A. 8 March 2006: Good advice from beentheredonethat, I will just add that some men like to share these pictures in the same way that some groups of men watch porn movies, never understood it myself but see no real harm in it except that you dont like it and it ... (read in full...)
He kissed me, but also my friend.....does he really like me?
Q. There is this guy that i really like and i know that he likes me, we have kissed. i know that he is a bit of a player and i dont want to get hurt. I am a virgin and i know that he is very experienced and i don't know if he just wants sex. I do ...
A. 8 March 2006: Forget him and move on, he is not a nice bloke and will end up breaking your heart, he is a potential two timmer and you need to steer well clear.... (read in full...)
My bf's parents won't let him go out.....now he wants to break up with me
Q. I have a problem I have been with my boyfriend for about 3 weeks. We've been on a few dates together and everything has been going fantastically well and we are both very much into eachother. However, recently, he had some problems at home, h...
A. 8 March 2006: What did he do that he gets this punishment, and how long before it is lifted.
He does seem to need to spend some time at home building bridges and getting his head sorted out, so it is understandable that he has worries about you added to them... (read in full...)
My ex and I have a son together, but I still really want to be with him!
Q. i have a 3 yr old son with my x , well at the moment he is my x, we've been broken up for nearly 2 yrs now but we was still having sex, this near our son will be 4. i am still in love with him and don't know how to move on as his love is the only ...
A. 8 March 2006: You have had a rough start in life but that is the past, now you need to take controle of this situation before it makes you ill.
He is using you for sex and that has to stop, you will never know if he wants you for you and to be in a rela... (read in full...)
What can I do to prove to him I won't cheat on him too!
Q. Hi all, I'll keep it short. Basically I met this guy (S) in October while I was seeing someone else (J). Both S and I fancied each other but nothing happened as I was taken. We bumped into each other again some weeks later and swapped numbers, and ...
A. 8 March 2006: I think you are flogging a dead horse, he is moving away and is not that interested, he likes you then he likes you less, he just is not ready for a full on relationship with you.
But I maybe wrong and it maybe that he is just hurt by the way you ... (read in full...)
I'm in love with my teacher! How do I attract him?
Q. I'm a 24 years old girl. I'm a political Science student. I've broken apart from my boy friend about 1 months ago. my real problem is that I'm in love with my master. I mean my teacher. he is about 50 years old, damn sexy and handsome. I'm in love ...
A. 8 March 2006: I know this is not what you want to hear but bear with me, do you think that you may be on the re-bound from your recent relationship, if so you need to get over this befor you even think of moving on as ending a relationship is traumatic and you ... (read in full...)
I love him but... All we do is argue, there is no spark and he is un-emotional!
Q. Hi, hope you can help. My fiance and I are getting married in August, we already have two children together (under two years old) We seem to argu alot? I get very depressed but I am too ashamed to talk to anyone...I love him very much and want to ...
A. 7 March 2006: First thing you need to do is regain your self respect and to do this you need some independance, this could be a part time job, look into this and the costs of nursery.
My sister has got a 9 month old baby and she has returned to work on a part... (read in full...)
What are my ex's REAL feelings about me?
Q. hey.. im in a tough situation right now.. my boyfreind recently broke up with me about 2 weeks ago.. we havnt been talking as much as i wish we would. he told me when he broke up with me that we could still be close.. and hang out. i use to be very ...
A. 7 March 2006: Sounds to me like he wants to stay your ex and that he wants to taper off the contact, he is only bothering with you when he wants and is giving no thougts to how you feel.
Leave him alone and dont let him keep promising you things, he does not... (read in full...)
My Dad is divorced, has no sense of smell, and because of this, he well, smells... How best to deal with this?
Q. My Mum and dad split up after 39yrs marriage. I left home at 19 to join the forces and never had a good relationship with my Dad. I am now divorced with one child my Mum has now met someone. I feel very guilty if i am not in contact with my Dad for ...
A. 7 March 2006: Really difficult one this as your dad needs to see his grandaughter as much as you need to see him.
He has no sense of smell but he should know that he needs to wash daily as im sure that is what he has been doing for most of his life.
Looks... (read in full...)
How do I tell my slobbery kisser that he's... Slobbery?
Q. I've been going out with a guy for a few weeks, we are 16 and we have kissed properly twice, both times it was really awkward because he was nervous and was all slobbery. Wot should i do because i dont want 2 say anything as he is shy and it'll ...
A. 7 March 2006: I agree with most of what martini says and he will know the bit i dont agree with ????
This is a problem that hopefully will get better with practice but to be honest, I really liked this dead fit guy once but once he kissed me it really put me off ... (read in full...)
My friend is more distant to me since I started dating her brother...
Q. I am dating my friend's brother. That part is not the problem though. The problem was that ever since I have started dating my friend's brother, it was getting harder and more awkward for me to talk to my friend now. After all, I did meet her ...
A. 7 March 2006: This was inevitable and normal, you were the person she could tell all her trouble to, she could tell you secrets etc, now she is keeping her gaurd up as she does not know what you will let slip to her brother.
When she agreed to you seeing h... (read in full...)
If it wasn't for the age-gap this would be perfect...
Q. I am really torn. I recently met a man who is 32. I am 18. We had a lovely evening, and it seemed as though we were infatuated with each other. We decided to meet up a few days later, but I freaked out about the age gap and cancelled, altho...
A. 7 March 2006: OK for once im going to say forget his age and go for it, you seem mature and he seems nice, you know your own mind and you have thought things through.
Date him and take it slow and easy as there is no rush, he is older and so may want things y... (read in full...)
I have a thing for my best friend's boyfriend!
Q. Hi, I am needing desperate help from the cupid bunch. Ok, the problem is that I have a thing for my best friends boyfriend, needless to say, I dont think she treats him fairly and sorry to say that I think I can be better for him. I wish that he was ...
A. 7 March 2006: You are subconciously distancing your self from your friend as you have guilt feelings about wanting her fella.
You are moving in for the kill without even realising what you are doing.
We all look on at other peoples relationships and can find... (read in full...)
Apart from sex, what can I do to keep him interested?
Q. My boyfriend is 26 and i'm 19.He was like the male character from a romance novel before.Now he's losing it for me.Im not ready to have sex with him.what can i do to keep him interested in me? I really love him and he says that he loves me.Please ...
A. 7 March 2006: I agree with irish, you need to stop looking at him as your fairy prince and see him as someone you are in an equal relationship with who is putting pressure on you to have sex that you are just not ready for.
tell him straight that you are not ... (read in full...)
I keep my daughter from seeing her dad as little as possible..am I choosing the right path on my daughter's behalf ?
Q. I wrote in yesterday and tried to respond…but there was an error…“I’ve been so strong but will I regret not having him in my life?” Thanx for your insightful advice on this one, I don’t have anyone else to discuss this with and appreciate all your ...
A. 7 March 2006: Look again at what you have wrote, you know deep in your heart that you are doing the right thing, you have a mothers love and instinct and that is to protect your child from harm.
This man is harm and so you are doing the natural thing, keep her ... (read in full...)
Did I make a mistake..showing my bf my posting on Cupid.org?
Q. i reccently wrote a question on here, releasing how i feel for my boyfriend and our relationship. i don't know why well actually i guess its because i wanted to share how i felt, but i showed my boyfriend what i wrote. i guess it was a really stupid ...
A. 7 March 2006: Oftern people do not like the truth and you shown him the truth about what was going on, how you felt etc.
The written word is more powerful than the spoken one and can hurt more or heal more, you took a chance and it did not pay off, what is done... (read in full...)
We can't have sex! His penis just won't go in...
Q. I've tried to have sex with my boyfriend for the 3 years but his penis just won't go in! Is there something wrong with me or can this happen to anyone? I was really in the mood and I don't know what's going wrong, is it just that I'm nervous and it ...
A. 7 March 2006: To try for 3 years to have sex and still not be able to manage it is not good, you both need to see someone, go to your gp and they will reffer you, you just cannot go on this way and need to have this problem sorted.... (read in full...)
Any tips on talkin' dirty for a shy girl?
Q. hi, i want to talk dirty to my man while giving him head but i dont know what to say or how to say it , im a very shy person and during sex i just moan and tell him what i like and dislike but i want to give him a suprise with some dirty talk but i ...
A. 7 March 2006: Talking to him will be difficult as you have a mouth full, so just use your hands and body, when you need to talk just ask if he is enjoying it, stroke him and pull him too you etc.
dont worry about what to say as he is just enjoying the sens... (read in full...)
I hate giving oral sex, but am I morally obligated because he does it for me?
Q. My hubby and I have been together for 3+ years. He enjoys giving me oral pleasure, but wants me to do it to him as well I do it once in a while but I hate it. I've told him but he thinks it is unfair that he does it to me. He does'nt insist but he ...
A. 7 March 2006: Love making is a two way thing and you like it when he does it to you and he likes it when you do it to him.
If you really feel you cannot do it then dont but if you can bring yourself to do it now and again then this should keep him happy.... (read in full...)
He's working away... How do I deal with my (almost) unfounded insecurities about his possible cheating?
Q. Ok, recently my husband took a new job(a little over 2 months now) and he has had to travel for it. The first two months he was home for maybe a month of that. And this morning he left again and will be gone til Friday. This has been very tough on ...
A. 7 March 2006: Well this is just one of those times in life where you are not in controle and so must just trust him.
If you continue trying to catch him out and worrying yourself sick about what he is doing you are for certain going to make yourself ill.
When ... (read in full...)
The spark's gone. All we do is talk about money or the kids! How do we get it back?
Q. My boyfriend and I have been together a long time. We live together and have two children. The problem is the spark sems to have gone from our relationship. We're both very busy and when we do find time together we argue about money his family o...
A. 6 March 2006: You have had a rough ride with relationships and it seems to me that this bloke is not much better than the last one,but you have choosen to stay and to try and salvage your sex life so good on you.
Sounds to me like he does not make that much eff... (read in full...)
He doesn't give me oral so should I for him?
Q. I always go down on my partner cos he likes it and enjoys it (i dont). I dont let him cum in my mouth tho because i dont like it. When i ask him to go down on me he wont he makes excuses. Am i right to give to him even tho he dont do the same for ...
A. 6 March 2006: Tell him straight, you are prepared to give him head but if you dont get it back then it will stop forthwith and that is that.
Relationships are give and take and that is in the bedroom department as well.
If you dont like something and it feels un... (read in full...)
When we argue, it's somehow always my fault. Then I chase her and apologise... I wish I didn't do that!
Q. I have been with my girlfriend for a year now, and we are both very close and spend a lot of time together. We are both 16 years old. However, recently, things have started falling apart a little - we argue more than ever. However, as much as we ...
A. 6 March 2006: I could say that by the fact that you are male your woman is going to make any argument into "your fault" but im not gonna do that,!!
Sounds like you have a little of the green eyed monster, but that aside, you really need to take a look at your ... (read in full...)
He's 28 and can't get a hardon. Could it be the drugs? Any suggestions?
Q. iv been seeing a lad from work since xmas 2005 and its going really well apart from in the bedroom,we are both 28, i dont think im his usual type but i no he`s liked me for ages and iv liked him a while too.Anyway he cant get a hard on no matter ...
A. 6 March 2006: I once went out with a bloke who would get hard until the actual time of entry then he went soft, nothing I did made any difference, and to be truthful after awhile my patience worn thin and I ditched the poor bugger,( I was young and not at all ... (read in full...)
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