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... Send *meedle a private message | | | *meedle's profile:51yrs old, have a 25yr old son. Live in North Wales and love it.
I have lived through many different experiences in my life, some happy and some traumatic. I am single and have been for 7yrs. I have lots of animals including a horse and sheep.
I work with people that are homeless, have mental illness or learning disability, ex offenders, substance misuse issues, self harm, low self esteem, fleeing domestic abuse, families going through difficulties, parents with children who are having difficulties. I work in supported housing so see all these issues regularity and work with agencies to get some help if I cannot help. |
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My bf has promised his 'uni mate' marriage and a baby!! What do i do?
Q. Hi there, I am really really hurt an upset, my boyfriend had this friend, she calls him alot now and then, when i asked him who she was, he replied back saying she is my uni mate, he even swore on my life that shes just a uni mate.... me and my b...
A. 1 March 2006: My advice is still the same, ditch him as he will surely hurt you, this other so called friend is also playing games with you and if I was you I would ditch her too, as he is either having an affair with your bloke or really wants one and will do ... (read in full...)
I think my husband lied about knowing this other woman for six years. I think he was just chatting her up!
Q. Tonight I just got back from a night out with my husband. He was eyeing up this girl who was eyeing up him back right in front of me, so engrossed with each other they didn’t even notice me storm off. When I moved back closer I saw him holder her ...
A. 26 February 2006: You have cleared up a few things for me and my advice is to ditch this rat, he is no good for you or your kids, get him out before he hurts you some more.
Get a solicitor or go to an advice centre, you need to know your financial and visitation righ... (read in full...)
My relationship has gotten terrible. My BF shouts at me and we get into awful arguments...
Q. hey! OK, I've been with my boyfriend for 2 and a half years now and I love him very much! But the past few months have been terrible. He shouts at me if I do something wrong or something he doesn't like! I find this very upseting and often cry over...
A. 26 February 2006: Bin him, he is not good for you, his behaviour is only going to get worse and you will end up his very own punch bag, get out of this abusive relationship.
You will soon get over the hurt of it ending and will in standing up to him and fini... (read in full...)
Do I give my ex another chance, knowing that he's always asking about his chances with other girls?
Q. I used to go out with this friend of my brother's but he broke up with me. He's in the Marines now and keeps saying he wants me to give him another chance. I told him he'd have to wait till he came home. My brother tells me though that he is al...
A. 26 February 2006: Forget him, just move on, he is one of those blokes who wants a girl in every port for home leave etc, just forget him and dont date him as you really will regret it.... (read in full...)
Things with my boyfriend have suddenly gone pear-shaped...
Q. I really care about my boyfriend, but lately he lies about stupid things. Sometimes he will pretend he's on the phone when I know he's not. He really cares about me and is constantly trying to prove he does, but I am worried. He is a senior and he ...
A. 26 February 2006: Talk to him, tell him what is bothering you, if he is as worried as you about the relationship then talking may resolve some of the issues, at worst it will make both of you be open with each other about were you see the relationship now and in the ... (read in full...)
She's trying to set me up with someone, but SHE is the perfect girl for me
Q. I've known of this girl since October last year, we both joined a musical group near where I live, and have been rehersing every week. Finally it is the 2 weeks of the show, and out at one of the social events, me and her get to talking. I find ...
A. 26 February 2006: Tell her that you find her company good and that you would like to keep in touch with her, if you do this and get to be friends then in time you may become closer.
Give her your number and take hers, ask if she has an e-mail address, this way you ... (read in full...)
My foreskin doesn't retract. How do I correct this?
Q. Alright, I am an 18 year old male, living in the UK. Growing up I lost my virginity with my grilfriend when I was 15, and have had various sexual partners since then. When I lost my virginity, my slightly more experienced girlfriend mentioned...
A. 26 February 2006: godofgraphics and Chris, both of you need to go see a doctor, I had a partner with the same problem and doc fixed it, if you leave it you will start to get other things wrong, so go make the appointment and sort it out.... (read in full...)
I like him but so does my friend...
Q. hi well theres this boy and i really like him he told me he likes me. But the problem is my friend(A) likes him and she likes some1 else. I told my other friend (b) that the boy likes me and my friend (a) isnt happy about it i really like the ...
A. 25 February 2006: Let him make up his mind which one of you he likes, are you sure he likes either of you.
Blokes are not worth falling out or loosing a good friend over so just wait and see but make it clear to your friend that there should be no bitterness betw... (read in full...)
I'm meeting my ex on Saturday. Do you think he still likes me??
Q. Hey im 15 and this is going to sound really stupid but here it goes... about 3 months ago i was going out with this lad but he ended it after 2 months because he lived a small distance from me. Ive had a boyfriend since then but we said it was o...
A. 25 February 2006: Text him and tell him that you have not heard from him about the arrangments for saturday, also try and get him on line.
If by Friday you cannot still get him then send him one final text saying that as he has not replied to your messages you gues... (read in full...)
We are attracted to each other but he has a gf-I need advice on what to do before this gets out of hand.
Q. I've met this guy through doing some work with him, which is not finished yet, I'm single and I thought he was, we started text flirting (he started it), it got really flirty and then he told me face to face, he had to stop as he was seeing someone ...
A. 25 February 2006: Use the time while he is away to really think things through and ask him to do the same, sometimes two people are just thrown together and are meant to be despite there being other people involved.
If you both feel you would be miserable apart then... (read in full...)
I can't stand sleeping with my bf, anymore-I'd rather be with the previous guy!
Q. Dear Cupids, I am very unsure what to do. My long-term boyfriend (3 Years, 25 and 26) and I got back together after a split for three months recently. He cheated on me (only a kiss he says) and had been having doubts about us and was unsu...
A. 25 February 2006: Do what you can to win back the bloke that made you feel good about yourself, the one you fancy and think about.
Ditch the one you are seeing now as he is not right for you and will continue to make you un-happy.
You should never have got back wit... (read in full...)
Scared that my gf's thoughts of her past, will destroy her. How can I help her?
Q. I love my girlfriend however she recently had an abortion as a result of a one off fling she had with a guy she used to work with before she knew me. She can't seem to let the past go and it seems to be making her more and more depressed. I have ...
A. 25 February 2006: She is grieving the loss of her baby, she did what she thought was right having the abortion but just was not prepared for the emotional distress she would feel, she needs to talk things throught with a trained proffessional who will work with her ... (read in full...)
My bf has promised his 'uni mate' marriage and a baby!! What do i do?
Q. Hi there, I am really really hurt an upset, my boyfriend had this friend, she calls him alot now and then, when i asked him who she was, he replied back saying she is my uni mate, he even swore on my life that shes just a uni mate.... me and my b...
A. 25 February 2006: Ditch him now, he is playing with you and looks like he has been playing with someone else too.
Finish it and move on.... (read in full...)
We're not sexually compatible and he doesn't seem to remember what I like. Worth continuing or let it go?
Q. Hi, I'm going out with a lovely guy but I try and avoid the sex as I don't enjoy it at all. He's not that interested in sex and I have tried lots to improve it but I always have to repeat to him what I like and I'm tired of it all. As I think ...
A. 25 February 2006: Maybe he just has a low sex drive, if you want more sex than him then maybe you are incompatable so should move on but before you do just think about sex with other partners did you always enjoy it with them or are you just not that bothered either ... (read in full...)
She sends me emails saying she's horny... but only at times when we can't be together!
Q. Hello there, I am unhappy with my sex life. My partner is a great girl but we hardly ever have sex. She just sent me an email saying she's horny knowing that she's at work and can't have sex, but as soon as I say we can do it after she says no, cuz ...
A. 25 February 2006: She is really playing with your head and you need to stop it, tell her you are sick of her little games and if she has gone of sex and off you then splitting up is on the cards, this will jolt her and open up hopefully a more honest relationship.
... (read in full...)
The guy I like wasn't interested, so how do I get over the embarrassment?
Q. I really like a guy who's in the year above me at school. I have asked him out and he told me that he liked me but not in that way, and that we should still be friends. Since then, we haven't spoken or even looked in each others' eyes. I know and...
A. 25 February 2006: You were brave to ask him out and did the right thing in doing so, but he likes you in a friendship way and not in a girlfriend way so you do need to get over this awkwardness with him and him with you as this is all the avoiding each other is.
W... (read in full...)
I'm friends with guys, but don't want to misread messages
Q. I'm a 15 yr old girl and I get on really well with guys, since I was very little. Most of my friends are guys because the girls at my school are a bit too girly and shrieky for me. But it means that I find it hard to see the gap between friends, ...
A. 25 February 2006: friends are better than boyfriends at your age, when you have a conection with someone you will feel it and so will he so for now just hang out and look outside your circle of friends for a boyfriend as it is more healthy, if you date someone in ... (read in full...)
My husband won't stop his affair. He even tells me that they're still in touch!
Q. I have been married almost three years and just found out the end of November that my husband had a sexual affair with a ex girlfriend. It should also be noted that we dated before getting married since high school and he left me once before for ...
A. 25 February 2006: He is a cheating bloke and he wont stop, you have tried and he has not so get rid of him, he is not taking your marriage seriously as lets face it being married is commitment to one partner, he is not and never will be, he wants to act like a single ... (read in full...)
He talks about marriage, but after more than six years, it's gone nowhere!
Q. Help This is my first time posting. I need help, I just don't know what to do anymore. Here it goes. I have been with my boyfriend for years and he proposed to me when I was pregnant with our daughter who is 5 now (engaged 5 years and been togethe...
A. 25 February 2006: Seems like you have allowed this to happen, he is walking all over you and you are letting him as you feel it is your place to do everything and put up with going nowhere, well nowhere is were your relationship is headed if you do not get a grip and ... (read in full...)
I wasn't the one she saw herself in the future, so she broke up with me..
Q. Mt girlfriend recently left me, because ( Well what she thinks ) she didn't see me being the guy she saw herself with in 10 years. You're not the person what I see myself in 10 years. and I quote "I'm deepy sorry to have to tell you that. But it's ...
A. 25 February 2006: She has finished it and choosen to tell you what she did to let you down gently, she just does not want to be with you and that is that, go find someone who does want to be with you.... (read in full...)
He's 14 years younger, but our kids are a similar age... Am I too old for him?
Q. Hi, I am going through a divorce and getting strong body language from the single neighbor guy that he likes me. Well, I just found out that he's only 33 and I'm 47! The problem is that I really like him a lot too! Am I too old for him, and wha...
A. 25 February 2006: Go for it, you are an experienced woman, not a young girl who is vulnerable so the age gap should not make much difference and you have kids of similar ages.... (read in full...)
Our month-long relationship was intense... then she pulled away and said we're "incompatible"...
Q. I have been in a very intense relationship for just over a month and have just been told that we're 'incompatible'. I just can't understand this. This girl has been very intense from the start. She has an 8 year old daughter who I think she is q...
A. 25 February 2006: I think that she has probably been really hurt in a previouse relationship, maybe by the fater of her child, she has built up a wall and may have been determined not to have a seriouse relationship until she meet you and that has just sent her head ... (read in full...)
We're in love and so far apart!
Q. What do you do if you fall in love with someone from another country? I met him last year on vacation and we've been in touch since then. I'm absolutely in love with him, but we live in two different countries. What can I do? I feel so lost....
A. 24 February 2006: Move! Falling in love long distance is not easy and you need to get to know him and see if he loves you etc,. this will be almost impossible from a distance so why not see if you can at least have a holiday with him with a view if all went well to a ... (read in full...)
I think my husband lied about knowing this other woman for six years. I think he was just chatting her up!
Q. Tonight I just got back from a night out with my husband. He was eyeing up this girl who was eyeing up him back right in front of me, so engrossed with each other they didn’t even notice me storm off. When I moved back closer I saw him holder her ...
A. 24 February 2006: Wow I would not like to get on the wrong side of you, and on the surface of it, you seem to be right about him just meeting her, but what is they do know each other would this make a difference, I think not as it is not so much when they met it is ... (read in full...)
He made me happy for the first time in my life. Ever since we split i have been falling apart. Please help!!
Q. I broke up with my bf a month ago. We were only together for a month and a week, but it was all extremely intense, and i was sure he really loved me. When we broke up, he said it was because i was too young (i'm 15, he had just turned 18 a few days...
A. 23 February 2006: This guy is a rat and you need to work through your grief of loosing him and the one relationship that has made you feel good.
Life is full of knocks like this but you will learn to face them head on, you are stronger than you think you just need... (read in full...)
I have PND and my partner doesnt understand how I am feeling!!
Q. My OH doesn't seem to understand how i am feeling. I have been suffering from PND and i need some info about it. I also could do with something explaining things about sex, like that not all women automatically go off sex just because they are ...
A. 23 February 2006: The other two people have given you all the info you need to be getting on with I can only tell you that it gets better and with time, support and the love of a good man you will come through this.... (read in full...)
Me and my bf dont talk anymore although he insists he loves me!!
Q. Basically I have been with my bf for 3 months, but recently we haven't been talking much. I always talk to him online as well and he goes silent then and then after a while says he's tired or he's got to go. At college he seems distracted and look...
A. 23 February 2006: This relationship is over, you need to tell him you are sick of his games and you are doing him a favour by finishing it as he definatly wants it over but has not had the guts to tell you. He is giving you all the signs!! take them and dump him ... (read in full...)
My bf is never bothered about meeting!!
Q. My bf never organises anything and is never bothered. If i ask him if he wants to meet up he just replies something along the lines of 'if u want' and when i ask where he wants to go it's a reply like 'wherever i don't mind' help! is it normal?...
A. 23 February 2006: Go with the flow is a an apt expression and it sums him up, dont worry it is better that than a bloke who wants to go out with his mates all the time and on the odd night drags the little lady with him.
Maybe he just likes were you arrange ... (read in full...)
I am sick of being lied to about porn! Where are the men who 'forsake all others'??
Q. I was just wondering as i am considering leaving my man over his constant looking at pornographic images and other women lustfully if there are in fact any men out there that dont do this? Men who love thier woman and worship thier woman in a way th...
A. 23 February 2006: Hi charlottie and Lisa 01, I have battled with this porn issue since I allowed the internet to be installed.
I was in hospital when we got the internet, and by the time I came out he was addicted so much so that he resented my return from hosp... (read in full...)
My ex wants to get back together but I think hes scared. How do i talk to him??
Q. I am 21 years old, me and my now very new ex boyfriend broke up mostly because he needs to focus on the 2 jobs he really wants and university also. These are things that are very important to him (he is 21 also). We were together for 5 months, ...
A. 23 February 2006: Talk to him and try and reach a compromise, you continue the relationship but make it less intense so he can spend time on his studies, work something out that is mutually agreeable.
He is trying to please everyone and is getting tied up in knot... (read in full...)
My ex broke up with me to date other girls but still wants sex with me!!!
Q. dear cupid, Me and my ex boyfriend broke up a week ago and i still am completely in love with him and still really care for him but i don't know what to do. He says he wants to date other girls and have some freedom, but he still wants to be with...
A. 23 February 2006: Get a grip on your pride, he is using you, dont let him, he does not want you he just wants a convenient bed partner when he has failed to score at a club or down the pub.
He wants casual sex but wants good old reliable ex to give him sexual reli... (read in full...)
He talks about his gf all the time-I hate hearing it! What should I do
Q. In Elementary School I used to be best friends with this guy. I used to go over to his house and everything-we were best friends. He is 2 years older though. So when he went to Jr. High-I dont know why, but we just stopped talking. Im now a freshman ...
A. 23 February 2006: Either grin and bear it and hope he falls out of love with the girlfriend and into love with you, or stop the communication as it is hurting you and just move on with your life, acept that he wants you as a friend and has got a girl he really wants ... (read in full...)
What are the chances are she'll want a relationship with me again? She needs more time to decide
Q. My girlfriend of 2 months has just told me feels our relationship is over, but needs a week apart to work out whether she just wants us to be friends or whether she wants a relationship with me. I asked her to be honest about it with me and I said ...
A. 23 February 2006: Give her time if you think the relationship is worth it, take a good look at the whole relationship what has gone wrong, whats good about it, do you really love her and are you right together?
Two months is not a long time, maybe she feels yo... (read in full...)
Why is he putting his marriage at risk for this polish woman? Help me to understand.
Q. Please help. My husband did not show me any attention and i found out that my husband had a secret with his polish work colleague. She asked him to draw a picture of him, because he is an artist and he started to draw her from memory behind my back, ...
A. 23 February 2006: He has had his head turned by this woman, she has flattered him by asking him to do her picture, he sounds like he is still in the flirting stage and hopefully nothing more than that has gone on.
Confront him with the letters that you got tran... (read in full...)
My ex bf is remarrying his ex-because she was there for him while he was in prison. This has upset me-what should I do?
Q. hi this is my first posting. i was with a man for 4yrs and we split up because his kids mother wouldn't stop harrasing us. it's been five years since then and that was my last real relationship, we were engaged and i bumped into his brother last ...
A. 23 February 2006: Get over him, he is making a go of it with his ex and you are well out of the picture, let them get on with it, for better or worse.
You need to leave him in the past and start seeing someone else there are plenty of nice blokes out there and one ... (read in full...)
Our month-long relationship was intense... then she pulled away and said we're "incompatible"...
Q. I have been in a very intense relationship for just over a month and have just been told that we're 'incompatible'. I just can't understand this. This girl has been very intense from the start. She has an 8 year old daughter who I think she is q...
A. 23 February 2006: It is hard to say what she is thinking, your relationship is so new that she may just have woken up to this and is pulling back due to realising she is committing herself and her daughter to a seriouse and committed relationship.
Relationships that... (read in full...)
I wanted her to think there was competition for my affections, so I lied about another woman...
Q. I told my wife things that werent true about a friend before we married that made it look to her as competition. I really didnt look at this woman that way; I did it to make me look better, but it backfired. Now she believes it to be true. I also h...
A. 23 February 2006: Once something is said be it in anger or not, it is said and so cannot be unsaid, words hurt and they are meant to hurt at the time, oftern when the heat is off we regrett what we said and try to get ourselves out of the hot water.
My advice is to r... (read in full...)
Me and my friend get on really well but then she dissappears for days at a time. Does she want more despite the age gap?
Q. As a 40 year old guy, I should be able to figure out the answer myself, but I can't, so I'm hoping someone will have a (polite) suggestion or two as to what to do. There's a girl I've known for some time, who recently I've seen rather a lot more...
A. 23 February 2006: Were does she go when she disapears for awhile and why does she apologise to you ?
What makes you think she wants a relationship other than the very good friendship that the two of you have, why spoil this, if it is meant to be more then fate will... (read in full...)
When i masterbate there is a pain at the end of my penis!!
Q. Hello I know this is kinda gross but some guys will undrstand me here, I'm a teenager, and I masturbate quite often, sometimes after I have done this, I get pain at the end of my penis. I can't ask anyone about this, just too embarassing, I know the...
A. 23 February 2006: I agree with Andy J, and add that when you masterbate a lot you can actually cause yourself pain, cut it out for a week and just dont do it so oftern.... (read in full...)
What is the difference between sex and making love??
Q. Simple question: What would you say is the difference between sex and making love? Thanks...
A. 23 February 2006: Sex can be with anyone, making love is with the one you love or have strong feelings for.... (read in full...)
I lost my virginity to my gf but she doesnt know and I am haunted by her more experienced past!!
Q. I've been dating my girlfriend for almost 2 years now and everything is going great for us. I think she is the one and she thinks the same of me she says, its not in the cards yet, but marriage could be in the future. The only problem is, I've lie...
A. 23 February 2006: I really do not feel that you need to tell her the truth about the loss of your vaginity she is happy with the sex so leave it at that, you seem to think she thinks you have had 50+ sexual partners, I doubt if this is true she is more likely to ... (read in full...)
I had to terminate our friendship, because of the way I felt about him. How can I get over it?
Q. My best friend is male and happily married. We have been friends for 12 years. I have been married for 20. He says he loves me but his marriage comes first. This is correct I suppose. I have terminated the friendship as I feel that I am not ...
A. 22 February 2006: It sounds like your relationship was in some way putting a strain on the marriage of your friend, so it is best that you have backed off, yes you are hurting and as you know only time will heal this.
Try and get out to meet other couples, do you ... (read in full...)
Are family or spouses more important in our lives?
Q. Who are the most important people in our lives, our parents, our spouses, or our siblings?...
A. 22 February 2006: Cannot answer this as to me all are important in different ways they are out support network and each has a role to play in our lives.
As long as one does not try to controle your life as it is your life and no one elses then you should not try to d... (read in full...)
My foreskin doesn't retract. How do I correct this?
Q. Alright, I am an 18 year old male, living in the UK. Growing up I lost my virginity with my grilfriend when I was 15, and have had various sexual partners since then. When I lost my virginity, my slightly more experienced girlfriend mentioned...
A. 18 February 2006: You have a medical condition and need to go see your GP, you must not delay in getting this seen to as it can and will cause you problems in later life.
Do not worry about circumsision as there maybe no need for this, but if you do have to have it, ... (read in full...)
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