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... Send *adzia1127 a private message | | | *adzia1127's profile: I guess you could count the seven years I spent at university as my qualifications. Yet as I have gotten older, my life has given me a lot more insight into people and how life plays out then all the professors combined.
I work in the community I live, where I also volunteer, run a local jogging group, work with the Hispanic community with my husband, and I am a soccer, track, swim mom.
Yet I like a good laugh and my icon is one of them. If you look closely you can see the big hair, puffy sleeves and shoulder pads of the 80's, hey a girl's gotta do what a girl's gotta do to pay for school and modelling is a good way to do it. Now my family and I get a good laugh over some of the pictures, they are a riot. |
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I sent a lad dirty texts and he showed his sister...
Q. I sent dirrty texts to this lad i no cos e asked me 2 n im nt bovered bout that, bt his sister has read them and she's also my best friend. I dont no how shes going 2 act when she sees me because their both on holiday and im really worried even tho ...
A. 15 August 2006: You need to choose which relationship is worth saving. After your last entry I would think that the friendship with the sister is your best bet.
Let this guy go and make amends with your friend. Tell her you were stupid for doing it, beg for her ... (read in full...)
My roommate is a potential love interest, but she's really selfish
Q. my roommate and i are both gay, and have been friends for a while. we both had feelings for each other a while back, but had relationships that kept us from taking things any further than just friends. well, recently my relationship ended, and we ...
A. 27 July 2006: Don't plan your life on her's or anyone else's words and promises.
Her actions are speaking volumes of truth.
... (read in full...)
I've got a libido that my wife just can't keep up with - what to do?
Q. I have been married for 18 years, I'm 47, and my wife is 45. We have 3 kids (16Male), (14Girl), and 11(Male) I am the sole provider for the family. . We have always differed in sexual desire. I seem to have a much stronger sex drive than my wife. ...
A. 27 July 2006: You can get your wife and you into sexual counselling. This might help direct both of you onto a more mutual appealing sexual life.
On average married couples have more sex then their single counterparts.... (read in full...)
I sent a lad dirty texts and he showed his sister...
Q. I sent dirrty texts to this lad i no cos e asked me 2 n im nt bovered bout that, bt his sister has read them and she's also my best friend. I dont no how shes going 2 act when she sees me because their both on holiday and im really worried even tho ...
A. 27 July 2006: You are mad because your trust was broken it is only natural. You're probably worried for now you might not have a friend in his sister depending on her reaction.
This is a hard lesson to learn, but never again do anything you don't want eve... (read in full...)
I hate my Dad!
Q. please help me, im 16 and im reaching the end of my teather, my dad keeps stressing me out by having ago at me for everything that goes wrong in his life and as my uncle and nan are extrimly ill im quite emotinal at the moment and my dad knows this ...
A. 27 July 2006: You need to get help. Keeping the abuse a secret will not protect you from being abused - it only makes it more likely that the abuse will continue.
You need talk to someone you can trust - a family member, a friend, a trusted teacher, a doctor, ... (read in full...)
My BF isn't texting/calling me anymore! Is he losing interest?
Q. I've been with my boyfriend for 4 months, and for the first 3 months, and even before we were dating, he talked to me almost EVERY day. At first he said he didn't want to ask me out because he worked so much and he was afraid he wouldn't be able to ...
A. 27 July 2006: He could be honestly tired, or overworked. He could also be being a coward and breaking up the relationship without talking to you.
Honorable men and women will come to terms with people and break-up. Allowing closure and finality to a rela... (read in full...)
Are nice girls considered too sweet, easy, and/or boring?
Q. Do nice girls make guys think too sweet/ easy and boring? Ok, all guys claim "we are jerks" because you girls like jerks, and this is us. Then what is going on in another round? My ex complained that his ex was too loud, too bossy, having mo...
A. 27 July 2006: Do not change for a man, all you will do is come to dislike what you changed into and lose the guy in the process.
It sounds like you know it is time for a change. Your guy claims, guys are jerks because that is what girls want, but you don'... (read in full...)
I feel the relationship is lopsided - who needs to change?
Q. Whos fault is it? I need help, me and my boyfriend have been going out for 9 months now but we've been having alot of problems. I feel he doesn't listen to me and he's always saying he's going to try and change or to fix us but he never does. He's ...
A. 27 July 2006: If you are unhappy in this relationship, it is not that you want more, it is that you need something different to be happy. Waiting will never solve anything in a relationship where needs are not being met.
People can change if they really want... (read in full...)
Am I Bi or is it just a phase?
Q. Well here it goes, i am having a problem. i don't know if i am bi or not. i like boys, infact i like boys alot but for a few years now i have been finding myself attracted to girls. i start having thoughts of being in a female-female relation...
A. 27 July 2006: This is a hard thing to counsel and direct in a few paragraphs.
The media pushes and sells the seductive angle on the girl on girl action. Also misrepresenting the whole gay or bi relationship.
The truth is you can care for and even love som... (read in full...)
My officemate is 4 years older than me and I want to ask her out
Q. I've started to become attracted to my colleague at work since I've got to know her better. I talk to her quite often and we get on very well. However, I have not dared once consider asking her out as I do not want to jeopardise our friendship if ...
A. 27 July 2006: Some will say that you shouldn't date from work. Yet we are a society that defines ourselves by the work we do, so it makes sense that romance gets intertwined into the whole lot. More romances bloom from work encounters after school/university ... (read in full...)
My lies are catching up to me, but I'm not brave enough to be honest
Q. I would like your help and advise, or just even your opinion would be gratfull. I am 28, married for 10yrs, and a have a 8yr old son. 2 yrs ago i went into a chat site, all the info i added was false, name, age, looks, everything..After a few ...
A. 26 July 2006: For some reason you felt compelled to go in and chat with strange men. All this makes me wonder why?
Why did you need that connection with another man? Why did you go looking for love when you were married?
I guess the big question... (read in full...)
He loves me more than I love him..
Q. i think my boyfriend loves me alot more than i love him ... i want to love him , but just dont feel that i do . however i feel as though i have no other choice ... i always think it may get better but can never be sure. he is so nice to me and a...
A. 26 July 2006: Your questions leaves a lot of questions unanswered. Considering you're female, (for men have no clue why women, and how to get women, to fall in love) to state he loves you more then him is an interesting statement.
Women are seduced and fall... (read in full...)
My guy has commitment issues - he doesn't want to call me "girlfriend"
Q. I went out with a guy for about a year, things got rocky after the first six months -- he was really mad at me and hurt by something I did, and though I apologized, I couldn't make things better. So I understand that. After several months of ...
A. 26 July 2006: There is nothing to recover for you have nothing. You don't have a boyfriend, you don't have a relationship, and you seem to be questioning your own intuition which is a very scary path to walk.
For the sake of your sanity call him up and tell... (read in full...)
Can a girl get a guy by always being there for him unconditionally?
Q. Can you win him over by alway being there for him unconditionally? A girl friend married her ex-boyfriend recently because he was always there for her no matter what happens in her life, if she wants to be single, he leaves her alone, if she...
A. 26 July 2006: Women fall in love with their minds, and as bad as it sounds Men use their penises to fall in love.
A man that wasn't attractive to a woman can become attractive to her over time if he seduces her mind.
On the other hand if a woman wa... (read in full...)
My husband didn't defend me or my daughter, when his parents made her cry. What should I do because he and I haven't spoked in 4 days over this.
Q. My husband (of 2 months) and I went to his parents anniversary party. I took my 13 year old daughter and her b/f along. His parents waited until I had left the room and then decided that they didn't like the way the kids were sitting on the couch, ...
A. 26 July 2006: You somehow dated and were engaged for 7years and never noticed that your future mom in law was a bit mean and your guy coward at her feet? If you did know this and didn't force change while dating or leave the guy and his mom in your dust, then ... (read in full...)
My wife makes our family holidays a misery!
Q. Whenever our family go on holiday my wife seems determined to spoil it for everyone. Last year she spent two days looking very annoyed, then, blew up at me for something trivial (the entrance fee to a waxworks would you believe, it wasn't even as ...
A. 21 July 2006: It sounds like you have already tried to talk to her, tried to be reasonable and rational.
She could have mental issues and need medication. She could also just be very controlling and needs to take anger management classes.
I am sure ... (read in full...)
How do I fall out of love and preserve our friendship?
Q. A few years ago while I was at college I met a girl who I became friends with. But after a while I went on to develop very strong feelings for her. The sort of feelings where you lay awake at night obsessing over someone. I ended up doing a lot ...
A. 21 July 2006: No couple has everything in common, it would be boring and frighteningly disturbing.
I wonder why you think you would not make it as a couple how different can you be?
I personally know a beauty queen that married a computer geek and they... (read in full...)
Not quite a hoiliday romance!
Q. Ive just come back from a fantastic holiday and on the first week met a great guy, but he fell for my best mate and i ended up copping off with his friend. Any how they had a quick kiss but my best mate wasnt really interested and me and him clicked ...
A. 21 July 2006: What are you trying to protect? You don't have years of friendship that you're worried about ruining. You don't have a history or past that will haunt you. You have a few days of fun and chatting.
If you don't go for it, you will always wond... (read in full...)
What do they do when checking for STI's?
Q. When a woman gets checked for STIs what's actually involved? ...
A. 21 July 2006: STD is a Sexually Transmitted Disease. STI refers to Sexually Transmitted Infection.
Women must have a pelvic exam with a q-tip used to collect mucus from the cervix. A urine specimen can also be collected by the patient in a cup. Some wome... (read in full...)
I don't know if I have ever known true love, do you?
Q. they say the course of true love never runs smoothly. I am 30 yrs old and dont know if I have never known it or have just dated guys who are f*** up. Is it me? do I not know what it is, I think I do, I have my parents as a great example. Are these ...
A. 20 July 2006: Most people find a love that can last a lifetime and call it true love. True love is not a once in a lifetime thing, It is a miracle.
True love is rare and most people do not find it. The few people who have experienced it can only tell you ... (read in full...)
I heard vasaline disintergrates condoms, and he has herpes
Q. I had sex for the first time a few days ago and we used a condom. I had been advised to use lubrication but chose to ignore it, but when we started out i was in so much pain i ended up using the vasaline that i happened to have with me, which solved ...
A. 20 July 2006: Oh dear, I hate to sound so disappointed but, honey you weren't ready for sex.
Vaseline is not a sexual lubrication and should Never be placed inside a woman's vagina. Ky jelly is the usual standard and can be purchased at a grocery store. For ... (read in full...)
I am a virgin, he wants sex, and I don't know if he loves me
Q. I have been seeing my b/f for 4 months now and he has now started to talk a lot about sex and become a lot more physical towards me! He has never made me feel uncomfortable and i have only done anything that i wanted with him, but now it is coming t...
A. 17 July 2006: If he hasn't declared his love to you do not have sex with him. Do not ask for the confirmation of love so in exchange you will have sex with him.
He needs to profess his love unpressured, and with no promise of sexual rewards to say it, to b... (read in full...)
How do I deal with a disobedient 9 year old girl?
Q. I am having trouble with my 9 year old daughter who has recently become quite rude and disobedient. I have tried smacking her but often she just refuses to get over my knee. What should I do? ...
A. 14 July 2006: Being the mother of a young teenager and a primary school aged child I can tell you the best system we came up with for them.
First we sat down with all our children and wrote a list of unacceptable behaviors, having them list all they coul... (read in full...)
My 5 yera old doesn't listen to me and is having social problems with his little friends.Is this normal?
Q. my 5 year od son is answering back all the time, doesn;t listen to a word i say and is constantly falling out with his freinds when they come to play. Is this normal for the age?...
A. 14 July 2006: Children will often have stages where they will test the bounds. This is normal and the response you give to him is very important.
You need to set the rules and hold him to it. You can talk to him and discuss what he thinks is fair for when... (read in full...)
There are so many signs I see.. But am I just being paranoid?
Q. I have been with my b/f for over a year just to give you information. We haven't seen each other since last saturday..we saw each other last night--usually i stay over so he brings clothes from his house--where he stays with his mother--and brings t...
A. 14 July 2006: Some girls stuff can be easily excused as 'that is my sister's stuff' or 'that's from my EX and I haven't had time to toss it yet'. One guy got really creative once and stated it was his 'dead' partners items and he didn't have the heart to even ... (read in full...)
Ladies: Do you play mind games when you're interested in someone?
Q. CAn any of you devulge to a mere mortal man what kind of mind games a woman would play on a guy in work if you fancied him? I think I'm being tortured...lol ...
A. 12 July 2006: A man who has been married for years can tell you, it is not mind games women play it is just that they speak a whole other language.
For example: when a girl says 'What do you think of (article of clothing, body part, something personal abou... (read in full...)
My daughter's mum wants to have another go! Great, but I'm with someone else now...
Q. I realise this is something I have brought on myself and feel like I am an awful person but I am really confused with what I want!! Basically my ex-girlfriend of 5 years ago, who I have a daughter with, is wanting to give things another try. I a...
A. 12 July 2006: You never married your current girlfriend of 4 years which says volumes on what your sub conscience is saying about the whole situation.
Most couples who are going to marry get engaged, within their first 2 years. Some know they want to marr... (read in full...)
I love him, but he's in the Army now. I can't accept that he'd choose a career that separates us!
Q. My bf joined the army recently and I really don't like it. I'm still quite young and don't want to be in a relationship that is so serious. I have been with him for 2 and a half years and he left 7 weeks ago. I am really not happy with the situatio...
A. 12 July 2006: This type of separation anxiety is a hard thing to deal with even with years of marriage. A girlfriend has nothing, if something happens she won't even be contacted unless his parents decide to contact her. It makes the anxiety twice as much and ... (read in full...)
Thought that we were "just friends", but only realised the truth when I started dating someone else...
Q. I made friends with someone who I met through a dating agency. Nothing happened between us but we supported each other through some hard times. Now I have a boyfriend and I realise that he does actually like me and it feels unwelcome. He is pa...
A. 12 July 2006: Honesty is always the best policy. If he responds badly to the truth now, at least he knows and can get on with his life.
If you want to go the easier way for you and to allow space and time to get your point across is not the nicer way. No one ... (read in full...)
Why didn't he try for me?
Q. hello i kept seeing this man around he was a friend of a friend and i was told he liked me every time i saw him he would come up to me and talk or id smile hello he didnt no i liked him tho i flirted but nothing ever come off it i saw him last n...
A. 11 July 2006: Love is a fickle thing, and marriage can blind side anyone.
He might have liked you but the honest truth is he didn't see you as his martial match.
The difference between liking a person and wanting to get married is a whole other dimensio... (read in full...)
I love her but she's confusing me a lot. What should I do?
Q. I was in luv with lady for the past 3 years now. I asked her out but she was too gridy, hard to confuse, she was not making herself available, chance to talk to but suddenly she changed her character to me. I then talked to her, she asked me about ...
A. 11 July 2006: It is interesting that a certain date is what is bothering her. It makes me wonder what happened or what she thinks happened.
If you have a mutual friend this is the time to ask them to intervene and find out, what about that date bothers her ... (read in full...)
There are so many signs I see.. But am I just being paranoid?
Q. I have been with my b/f for over a year just to give you information. We haven't seen each other since last saturday..we saw each other last night--usually i stay over so he brings clothes from his house--where he stays with his mother--and brings t...
A. 11 July 2006: I have given out the list before of the signs of a cheater to others on this site and it sounds like you have a lot of room for concern with your boyfriend.
Keep your eyes open and listen to your head, for something is not right in your boyf... (read in full...)
What was my BF doing in the bathroom with his phone?
Q. Am I reading into things too much with my b/f of a year? We were laying down and going to be getting ready for the day--and he goes to take his shower and has his cell in his hand and said 'are you done in here for a little while?'--i guess me...
A. 11 July 2006: Out of that list the best thing you can do is listen to your gut feeling. You are in the relationship none of your friends, and none of us are, you see the change in behavior patterns we don't.
There is a reason why people say 'I should have... (read in full...)
Haven't broken it off with the old boyfriend, but I *have* got a new boyfriend...
Q. I'm having a hard time finishing it off completely off with my bf who I've been with for a year and a half. I told him that I needed space but I didn't completely just break it off. I have fallen for my old high school flame. We have always h...
A. 10 July 2006: You know you need to choose or you will lose them both.
... (read in full...)
He faces a tough workload, and takes his temper out on me!
Q. Is my relationship worth trying to save? Him and I have been together for a little over 2 years now and we have lived together for about a year and a half (and have been engaged for that duration). When we got together, things were entirely di...
A. 10 July 2006: There are couples that are married for 10, 20, 30 years and the spark and love is still alive. It is a lie that love and tenderness fades over time.
What you have described is a typical abuse cycle, it's starts with love and flowers and goes... (read in full...)
What was my BF doing in the bathroom with his phone?
Q. Am I reading into things too much with my b/f of a year? We were laying down and going to be getting ready for the day--and he goes to take his shower and has his cell in his hand and said 'are you done in here for a little while?'--i guess me...
A. 10 July 2006: Some of these signs of cheating are "tongue in cheek" while others are tell-tale signs that commonly appear with a partner.
Just a few might be nothing but if this list gives you too many red flags then you're not paranoid.
1) You find bir... (read in full...)
He went quiet when he went home... And I hate the company he keeps!
Q. Hiya.. i'v been together with my boyfriend for 3 and a half yrs nw.. We both study in the Uk and are 21 yrs old.. However he's gone back to our home country this summer.. The first 3 days that he reached there he was always in contact with me.. via ...
A. 8 July 2006: Your only real option is to trust him or your going to drive yourself nuts.
If this is your first experience apart then his actions might be completely normal for him. If you require more maintenance when apart then you need to consider a diff... (read in full...)
Need to stop flirting with my workmate before it gets out of hand...
Q. I'm married; he's married. Too much flirting. Now I have attraction for him! How do I stop when we work together?...
A. 8 July 2006: You stop! Just like you resist that last helping of dessert, Just like you resist flipping off the bad driver cutting you off. Just like you resist any temptation that you know you don't want to deal with the consequences.
You stop all acti... (read in full...)
How do I tell her what I'd like without hurting her feelings?
Q. Hi, I am in my late 20's and, after coming out of a long term relationship, have started going out with a new girl my age a few months ago. I am starting to think she is very inexperienced though. What is the best way to tell someone that you wo...
A. 8 July 2006: The best way to tell anyone something whether a girl or boy is too put it as a compliment.
If they ever do anything that is remotely like what you want, tell her you love it when she does 'such and such'. If she doesn't do anything even remo... (read in full...)
Was I wrong to blurt out my hurt feelings? Shouldn't he forgive and forget?
Q. Was what I said hurtful? I was dating a guy for about a month, even though all our dates consisted of simply hanging out at my place. One night his friend called and needed help with something, so he just left, even though I hadn't seen him for ...
A. 8 July 2006: If he was a caring, loving boyfriend he would have validated your feelings and tried everything in his power to make the real truth known.
Yet as all of us know, when someone says something that strikes to close to the horrible truth, it surp... (read in full...)
My boyfriend, my best friend and ME!
Q. Ok I have an even bigger problem now…my feelings for my best friend have come back and even stronger. The problem is all my friends see that my boyfriend treats me like sh** now. He seems to think I’ll never leave him and no matter what promises he ...
A. 5 July 2006: You need to stand on your own two feet then look around the world and decide what you want.
It sounds like your boyfriend has monopolized your life and superseded your friends and family with his. This is type of controlling behavior is one of t... (read in full...)
How do we get over the religion thing?
Q. hi, my question is, i love a girl very deeply who studey in my college. she is junior to me but we are in same age, but she is from another religion. earlier i was friend of her. later on our relationship got closer and i fell in love with her. ...
A. 29 June 2006: Religion and family are hard things to mess with. Your options are to start looking into her religion with an open mind and not dismiss converting. It would make a good impression on her parents.
If you get some alone time with her it woul... (read in full...)
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