New here? Register in under one minute   Already a member? Login244945 questions, 1084256 answers  

  DearCupid.ORG relationship advice
  Got a relationship, dating, love or sex question? Ask for help!Search
 New Questions Answers . Most Discussed Viewed . Unanswered . Followups . Forums . Top agony aunts . About Us .  Articles  . Sitemap
*methyst agony aunt

*methyst

United States  (Female   XML/RSS

Like what she writes?
... Add *methyst to your favourite agony aunts

Want to get in touch?
... Send *methyst a private message

*methyst's Ratings
Excellent77%
Average6%
Poor16%
*methyst's profile:

I am merely seventeen years of age, but since I was five years old I've been giving people even twice my age advice. I've went through a lot in my life, and have helped a lot of people, so I can relate to a lot of the questions I've seen so far. But don't judge me by my age, I'm more mature than my mother! And, please don't stereotype me with the rest of the "teenage" lovers, I actually am in a serious relationship and I know it's not all sunshine and butterflies. My guess is that I want to help give out advice to help others not make the mistakes I've made, and somewhat... make up for them in the process by doing so. I'm also not afraid to be brutally honest.

As for my avatar... I drew it. :) I'm also an artist, a microsoft paint artist to be exact.

L'amour peut être le plus grand cadeau, ou la plus mauvaise malédiction!

(Love can be the greatest gift, or the worst curse!)

~ Amethyst

1234Next > [4 pages, 131 answers]

The love of my life just asked me out for another guy! What should I do?

Q.   The love of my life just asked me out for another guy what should I do?...

A.   21 March 2007: Wow, toughy. Well, just tell him that you're flattered, but you've already got your eye set on someone else. If you don't want to flat out say "you" then that's about the best option. If you say anything else, he won't EVER look your way. ... (read in full...)

She met an older guy online and now she's got a one-way ticket to Russia, for Thursday! I am scared for..what can I do?

Q.   Okay, I am at my wit's end here. Please please help! I am 18 years old and my best friend (let's call her "Laura") is making a huge mistake. Laura is 19 and I've known her my entire life. She's never done anything remotely rebellious or ...

A.   24 January 2007: She's an extremely lonely girl, never having a boyfriend, it's natural for her to jump the gun a bit... but this is a bit ridiculous. If it were merely an online dating, I'd say just be supportive, but keep her in check... but it's a bit insane to ... (read in full...)

She wants us to be more intimate. What does she mean?

Q.   My girlfriend has told me that she wants our relationship to be more intimate, what does that mean and what can i do to be more intimate?...

A.   24 January 2007: Try being more romantic, and more emotionally close. Treat her right, and listen to her when she has things to say (no matter how uninterested you really are, act it!). All women (whether secretly or otherwise) have a soft spot for romance. Take her ... (read in full...)

Odd things happen when I masturbate..is this normal?

Q.   When I masturbate, sometimes white stuff comes out and my testicles are "hard like" when it happens yet sometimes if i have been doing it often in a short period of time (eg. 3rd time in 1 day) my testicles are soft and a clear stuff comes out. Is ...

A.   24 January 2007: Yes, it is completely normal. The white stuff is indeed sperm, what's SUPPOSED to come out when having sex/masturbating. The clear stuff is simply semen, without the sperm, and if you're doing it that many times a day.. the sperm hasn't had time to ... (read in full...)

I find condoms desensitizing, and it kills my mood for sex--any advice?

Q.   My girlfriend used to be on the pill, but currently is not. I am not sure how long she has been off it. Currently we use condoms, but I really hate them. Now we would be safe and get tested if she were to go back on the pill. When we talked about ...

A.   24 January 2007: Yes, it is risky hopping from pill to no pill back to pill again. It can mess with the hormones and trust me, you don't want to put her through what I went through. I walked into French class at school and started crying because I was late, then sat ... (read in full...)

During sex, is laughter a normal thing to do?

Q.   During Sex, is Laughter normal? Understand that until recently I was a virgin and all I knew of sex I gleaned from pornography. I was having sex with my new gf and I started laughing uncontrollably. She asked what was so funny like I'd offende...

A.   24 January 2007: Are you perhaps ticklish? Or maybe you're one of those who sometimes can't help but laugh uncontrollably when you're nervous/excited/or feel a bit off. I sometimes laugh like a dork, but... can't imagine doing it during sex... *wouldn't really ... (read in full...)

I want to have a sexual relationship with my straight best friend. How do I go about this?

Q.   I'm straight (slight bi tendencies but I prefer women)and I have a straight best friend named Adam who I've been having sexual fantasies about since we were in high school. Lately, I have been doing it more and more frequently. We have both been ...

A.   24 January 2007: Wow... you're in a sticky situation. If your friend gets freaked, that could be the end of the friendship right there. It's natural from what I know to be curious, especially with someone so close for so long. My suggestion? Drop hints! Subtle, ... (read in full...)

Another guy walked in on us having sex and joined in. I told him to leave and he wouldn't! Is this rape?

Q.   Ok. i have been thinking. I went to a bar a while ago and eneded up going home with a guy i knew of from high school. well we were having sex and another guy popped in and began messing with me as well. I didnt want this other guy there at all. but ...

A.   24 January 2007: Yeah, then I say file rape charges. You were being responsible not driving drunk... and they SHOULD look at that... though it may still not work in your favor unless he pleads guilty... they'll say "Couldn't you have called someone" or "you could ... (read in full...)

Another guy walked in on us having sex and joined in. I told him to leave and he wouldn't! Is this rape?

Q.   Ok. i have been thinking. I went to a bar a while ago and eneded up going home with a guy i knew of from high school. well we were having sex and another guy popped in and began messing with me as well. I didnt want this other guy there at all. but ...

A.   23 January 2007: I can see it as rape, since it was not mutually wanted, but the law might not see it as such. They see it as, if you didn't get up and leave, you eventually agreed. Now, if you had gotten up and attempted to walk out, and he pinned you down and ... (read in full...)

How can I ask her out as a friend without scaring her off?

Q.   i met this girl once went all my mates went out she came as well. we got on well. later she added me on msn and than asked for my number. she made me swear I'll text her back. i want to take her out but we've only met once but talked a lot on-line. ...

A.   23 January 2007: Well, my suggestion is one day during an online chat you mention going to a movie or something and ask her if she'd like to come along. Be casual about it, the more nervous you act, the more she'll think "Oh my goodness... he's asking me out!" If ... (read in full...)

He has a 'pee' fetish and it weirds me out! How do I handle this?

Q.   Ok ive been with my boyfriend for 2 yrs, were really good together and have a great sex life. The thing is he recently revealed a bit of a fetish to me, he told me peeing turns him on. I mean ive heard of it but its not something i ever thought ...

A.   23 January 2007: Everyone has their own little "weird" quirks about them, all you can really do is be supportive and let him know that, while you can't bring yourself to doing it, you're glad he told you. That way, he won't feel AS embarrassed about it, and he may ... (read in full...)

My bf left me for a friend of mine. I need closure from all this...please help?

Q.   The floor fell out from under my feet when after two years of what I thought was a good relationship my boyfriend told me that he was seeing my close girlfriend ( I believe he put it as a “midlife” crisis). It suddenly made sense why she had been ...

A.   23 January 2007: As I put in my profile, love can be the greatest blessing or the worst curse. In your case, it's fallen into the latter. I'm sorry to hear you're in love with a man who can't make up his mind, and I'll do my best to help you with the whole or... (read in full...)

I haven't got my period! Am I Pregnant?

Q.   I am in a serious relationship with my boyfriend. We have had sex twice and we used protection both times. I still think I might be pregnant because my period hasn't come yet. What do I do?...

A.   23 January 2007: Well, I can't tell you whether you're panicing or not because you never said how long you've missed your period by. If it's less than a week, don't worry for a bit longer, because at the age you're in it's irregular anyway. If it's been longer, ... (read in full...)

Dated men all my life but find I am attracted to females. Why is this happening?

Q.   i have been with men all my life but i found myself attracted to a female. why?...

A.   21 January 2007: No one can say for sure why this is happening, but my idea on the situation is that perhaps you are curious about females due to bad relationship with males. I've heard it happen numerous times before. You can't really help it, and from what I know, ... (read in full...)

How do I change my screen name on this site?

Q.   how do i change my screen name on dear cupid?...

A.   21 January 2007: I've looked account options up and down, and I really don't think you can change your username. My best suggestion is you contact Andrew and ask, or surf through the forum and see if there's anything about it/post up the suggestion of adding that as ... (read in full...)

Broke up with this guy and fell on love with his brother. But we can't tell his family.! Any advice

Q.   I dated a guy for over 3 years but we broke up over a year ago. I gave him everything a person could possibly give in a relationship but he was a very selfish man and was only concerned with himself and his hobbies. Throughout our relationship I ...

A.   21 January 2007: I've seen something like this work out... in the movie "The Family Stone." If that's any sort of encouragement. Really though, it's out of your hands, you're not the one that should tell his family, he is. While it's understandable he doesn't want ... (read in full...)

I love my bf but...Is this older guy at work making a move on me?

Q.   I am 17 and have been dating my boyfriend who is 2 years older than me for 7 months. I absolutely love him and don't see any other guy as possibly being right for me. However, there is a 21 year old guy I work with that flirts with me. The other ...

A.   20 January 2007: If your relationship is as good as you're making it out to be, you won't let him tear your relationship apart. If you're finding yourself torn between the two -because- you're confused on who you love/like more, then you don't really love either ... (read in full...)

He has an obssession with "shemale" porn! What can I do?

Q.   I NEED HELP IVE WITH MY BOYFRIEND FOR TWO YEARS NOW AND I THINK SOMETHING IS WRONG LATELY IVE BEEN SUSPECTING ABOUT HIM DOING SOMETHING ON THE COMPUTER HE HAS BEEN LOOKING AT SHEMALE PORN WE HAVE TWO COMPUTERS ONE IN OUR BEDROOM AND THE OTHER IN THE ...

A.   20 January 2007: Wow, I know you're frantic, but the caps lock hurts the eyes! x.x My only suggestion is if you want to know what's going on, ask him. Sit down with him and calmly ask him what he's doing, promise him you won't get mad and KEEP THAT PROMISE! If ... (read in full...)

15 and secretly agreed to marry my secret boyfriend!

Q.   Im 15 years old and my boyfriend who ive been with for two years asked me to marry him, on christmas eve. Ive said yes and although we are keeping our relationship secret from everyone else because were afraid they'll ruin it i have decided i want ...

A.   20 January 2007: I'm not trying to sound mean, but... It's obvious you two aren't in a strong enough relationship to even think about marriage yet. If you two can break up because of friends not liking you two being together, it shows you two aren't inse... (read in full...)

My bf, his brother and I all live together. How do we tell his bro we want our own place w/out sounding like jerks??

Q.   Hi guys I need abit of help well my boyfriend does not me My boyfriend (23) I (21) live together with his brother (20) but after talk to wach other, we are decided on getting our own place, but the big problem is we don't know how to tell his...

A.   13 January 2007: Good luck with it! I hope you're new place is suiting!... (read in full...)

I tell my best friend who I like, then she goes and flirts w/ them in front of me!

Q.   hello please will lots of people answrr as i would like a range of ideas please :(...... i dont no what to do, i tell my best friend i like some lads and she goes and flirts with them infront of me she's alot prettier than me and i have low self of ...

A.   11 January 2007: I had a friend like that, but with other things. (I never really was into the whole crush bit.) She's got a problem. Obviously, she's not much of a friend if she's doing that, or maybe she doesn't realize she's doing it. (Wishful thinking... (read in full...)

My bf, his brother and I all live together. How do we tell his bro we want our own place w/out sounding like jerks??

Q.   Hi guys I need abit of help well my boyfriend does not me My boyfriend (23) I (21) live together with his brother (20) but after talk to wach other, we are decided on getting our own place, but the big problem is we don't know how to tell his...

A.   11 January 2007: I just got back to this thread, and read up on it... so I hope my response to the mail you sent wasn't too far off. I think I got the same info in that summary, so it shouldn't be. Good luck hun, and I wish you the best! "Mark" is going to hav... (read in full...)

I saw him pleasing himself... Wht does it mean!?

Q.   Recently I accidently saw my boyfriend masturbating. I thought we had a healthy sex life. Why does he need to do this? Also I saw naked pictures of him on his phone what does all this mean...

A.   10 January 2007: Yeah, I can see you're curiousity about his masturbation need, but it's probably not that he's not getting enough with you. He might just be overly horny, I know way too much about guys, and let me tell you, that's a definate possibility, but not ... (read in full...)

My bf is way, way too sensitive about everything!!! What can I do about this?

Q.   I need advice on how to deal with an over sensitive boyfriend... I've been with my boyfriend for a few months now but I dont know how long it will last. I never thought I would be complaining about a guy being sensitive but he really is a big ba...

A.   10 January 2007: Trust me, the best thing to do is help him overcome his insecuraties. Tell him that you're not going to just one day end it and leave him oblivious about it. Let him know that, though you're happy with him, he's going to end up pushing you away ... (read in full...)

My friends said he liked me, then I told them his name. They say he's like that w/ everyone. Are they being truthful?

Q.   So I told a couple of my girl friends what's been going between me and a guy for the past couple of weeks and they automatically said that the guy must like me, but the second I told them who it was, they instantly told me that he couldn't like me ...

A.   10 January 2007: That's a tricky question, I can't tell you which it is. I can suggest though, if you want to know if it's how it is with him, ask another girl he has contact with, and see if it is how he is with her. It sounds kinda fishy, but they may just be good ... (read in full...)

15 and secretly agreed to marry my secret boyfriend!

Q.   Im 15 years old and my boyfriend who ive been with for two years asked me to marry him, on christmas eve. Ive said yes and although we are keeping our relationship secret from everyone else because were afraid they'll ruin it i have decided i want ...

A.   10 January 2007: While I'm not trying to come in and tell you what you want to hear (all the while tossing off the other two respondies), I do have a bit more of a know-how-you-feel complex. While I know most people do not agree with me being engaged, I still be... (read in full...)

My bf, his brother and I all live together. How do we tell his bro we want our own place w/out sounding like jerks??

Q.   Hi guys I need abit of help well my boyfriend does not me My boyfriend (23) I (21) live together with his brother (20) but after talk to wach other, we are decided on getting our own place, but the big problem is we don't know how to tell his...

A.   7 January 2007: Well, his brother is a grown man now, and in time he's going to have responsibilites (aka, a girlfriend perhaps?) of his own, so he's going to need a place for the two of them as well. I really don't know the best approach, but I'll give you my best ... (read in full...)

We want to kiss, but we've never done it before! I'm 12 and he's 14. Does that matter?

Q.   My boyfriend and I have been going out for 5 weeks now.And we have said that we wanted to kiss each other.It will be my first kiss and his.We both said we were going to kiss the next day but I guess we both got nervous and didn't.He then told me he ...

A.   7 January 2007: OH.. I just re-read.. I completely forgot to answer your "how" question. Just incase you meant that literally... you push out/pucker your lips a bit, lean in, and press your lips to his. Other kisses will wait until you're older. .... (read in full...)

We want to kiss, but we've never done it before! I'm 12 and he's 14. Does that matter?

Q.   My boyfriend and I have been going out for 5 weeks now.And we have said that we wanted to kiss each other.It will be my first kiss and his.We both said we were going to kiss the next day but I guess we both got nervous and didn't.He then told me he ...

A.   7 January 2007: Awwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwww you're sooooooo cute. :3 You remind me of me on my first (real) kiss! Hun, age difference doesn't matter... and you sound rather mature for your age, that's a good thing. Anyway, let me tell you from someone who KNOWS how it... (read in full...)

Do the labia grow during puberty? Concerned parent.

Q.   I'm a little concerned: my 8 yr old daughter told me she had a rash on her thighs and asked me to look. It simply looked like a heat rash to me, but I noticed that she doesn't seem to have labia. Will these grow during puberty? ...

A.   7 January 2007: Found it! "The vagina becomes longer and the labia more pronounced as both internal and external reproductive organs and genitals grow." I found a rather informative site that you might like to read in a couple of years, to prepare yourself for her ... (read in full...)

Do the labia grow during puberty? Concerned parent.

Q.   I'm a little concerned: my 8 yr old daughter told me she had a rash on her thighs and asked me to look. It simply looked like a heat rash to me, but I noticed that she doesn't seem to have labia. Will these grow during puberty? ...

A.   7 January 2007: Um... you might want to get her checked out, or better yet, do some research. I'm pretty sure they grow during puberty... but I never bothered to study myself 8 years ago.... this will probably bother me so I'll probably do some research tonight and ... (read in full...)

Am I getting an orgasm or steps leading up to one?

Q.   ok so sry if this gets a bit in detailed but im not sure if i get an orgasm or if its just a little thing before i reach orgasm. so after a little while i will start to shake (writhe) and my breathing will increase and i will get really wet then ...

A.   7 January 2007: It's really hard to tell, since everyone is different and everyone is going to react differently. Eventually, does the feeling suddenly die? If so, I'd say you're one of the lucky ladies that gets multiple. From some recent research I did, it also ... (read in full...)

I'm being tretaed like a doormat..I need to gain respect from others.. how do you get this?

Q.   I have noticed that I have been unable to express negative emotions towards friends/boyfriends (for fear of them not liking me and looking like I haven't got a sense of humour) and as a consequence I have been treated like a doormat to such a degree ...

A.   7 January 2007: Ha, I thought I was the only one that went through such a stage, or at least that I'd never encounter someone who was as passive as me. :p What you have to do is just be honest. If something makes you feel as if you're simply being used, don't ju... (read in full...)

Do you think absence will make her heart grow fonder... could we possibly have another chance?

Q.   Ok I was a gay relationship for 2 years. We were so close and did everything today but she broke up with me a couple of days ago. Im heart broken she said she wants to go into 2007 single, she wont ever get back with me because Ive hurt her too much ...

A.   31 December 2006: Well, no one can really tell you whether or not she'll take you back, it's apparent that you've hurt her numerous times... by the comment about you hurting her too much. I don't know what you did to her, and I'm not going to ask, but all I can say ... (read in full...)

What do guys think about petite women?

Q.   I was wondering what men REALLY think about women who are petite. I wanted to ask this question because I heard someone say that short women are not sexy enough like taller women, and that guys rather be with women who are taller. I am 5 feet tal...

A.   31 December 2006: Look, it's all in the taste of individual man, there's no universal man code for sexyness, even though sometimes you begin to wonder. I know a lot of girls who are still in the 4 foot range, and they all have boyfriends that love them all the same... (read in full...)

He has a gf but wants to break up with her, to be with me...should I continue with him or give up?

Q.   There is this guy whom I would like to be with but he has a live-in girlfreind. He says he is done with her and wants her out. Do you see us being together or should I just give up on him....

A.   31 December 2006: I know this might sound terrible, but I've learned through the course of my life that pushing him away isn't going to solve anything. At least he's not trying to have you both, right? Obviously he really is done with her, and would rather be with ... (read in full...)

My periods have stopped!

Q.   I had taken birthcontrol for two in a half years and i stopped taking it about six months ago and still haven't had a period. now i'm scared i can't have kids what is wrong with me?...

A.   31 December 2006: Did you just one day suddenly stop taking your BC? If that's the case then you're just like me. See, I haven't had one in about 6 months (happy, save the bit of weight I gained on the scales...). I don't feel you should panic, but you should go get ... (read in full...)

He 's balck..I'm white and my family are against interracial relationships! What should I do?

Q.   I would like some feedback on what to do about this situation. I have met a great guy recently who I really like and who likes me. He is black and I am white. He has only dateed white women and his family has no problem with it. I've never dated a ...

A.   31 December 2006: You go girl! That's the spirit! I hope you two are very happy together. ^_^... (read in full...)

My friend is 13 and she's dating a 19 year old....is this okay?

Q.   is it ok for my 13 year old friend to date a 19 year old?...

A.   30 December 2006: Well then obviously he really has emotions for her, therefore the age gap shouldn't be a problem as long as he's a nice guy. There's nothing wrong with him, he's just attracted to a girl and is managing to not care about the strange looks he'll be ... (read in full...)

Is it still wrong to feel used?

Q.   is it wrong 2 feel used if you give a blow job and then they leave..?..i duno if it that they got what they want now they can leave.or that they really do need to leave..but is it still wrong 2 feel used?!...

A.   30 December 2006: If he's only free when he wants a blowjob, I suggest you reconsider having anything to do with him, because it's pretty obvious he's using you.... (read in full...)

He 's balck..I'm white and my family are against interracial relationships! What should I do?

Q.   I would like some feedback on what to do about this situation. I have met a great guy recently who I really like and who likes me. He is black and I am white. He has only dateed white women and his family has no problem with it. I've never dated a ...

A.   30 December 2006: I live in Southern US as well but let me tell you, it's not as uncommon as you may think. It's just kept on the DL (down low) most of the time. But there are some, like me, who are completely fine with it and really don't care what others think. If ... (read in full...)

Is it still wrong to feel used?

Q.   is it wrong 2 feel used if you give a blow job and then they leave..?..i duno if it that they got what they want now they can leave.or that they really do need to leave..but is it still wrong 2 feel used?!...

A.   28 December 2006: It's natural to question sometimes, and to feel used, yes. If this is a repeated occurance, chances are he's using you. If it's only happened once, decide whether to give him the benefit of a doubt or not. No one can tell you the truth other than ... (read in full...)

My friend is 13 and she's dating a 19 year old....is this okay?

Q.   is it ok for my 13 year old friend to date a 19 year old?...

A.   26 November 2006: While I'd like to say your friend is mature enough and responsible enough to handle herself, I don't know her so I can't make that judgement. Mostly though, in today's society, this is a big "no-no." The age difference isn't a problem of numbers, ... (read in full...)

*methyst's friends

These are mutual friends, so *methyst has added them and they have added *methyst!

~SecretGrl~ agony aunt~SecretGrl~
Belle*En*Noire agony auntBelle*En*Noire
David Lewis agony auntDavid Lewis
finchy agony auntfinchy
Jadzia1127 agony auntJadzia1127
msel2304 agony auntmsel2304
OnlyAGirl agony auntOnlyAGirl
skywalker agony auntskywalker
slevin agony auntslevin
sweetiegirl agony auntsweetiegirl
SXYBB91 agony auntSXYBB91

All Content Copyright (C) DearCupid.ORG 2004-2008 - we actively monitor for copyright theft

0.0937568999943323!