I told him that I liked him but he just said that let's go with flow. Am I just a friend to him?
Q. I told one of my guy friend that I liked him but he just said that let's go with flow. From that day we started texting a lot. It's been 9 months.. I don't know where exactly we stand.. We talk and meet up sometimes but we haven't talk on this top...
A. 29 December 2016: Or leap tall buildings!... (read in full...)
How can I make this work, with her? We both need to lose weight, but her motivation is waning.
Q. I want to be fit. I want that for my girlfriend too. So does she. She complains about how clothes look on her. She is very attractive but could be in better shape. Obviously, I’m on board. She is all talk but little action. I tried to make i...
A. 29 December 2016: It sounds like you are already half way out the door. Here's my best advice: 'Know what you want'. ... (read in full...)
I told him that I liked him but he just said that let's go with flow. Am I just a friend to him?
Q. I told one of my guy friend that I liked him but he just said that let's go with flow. From that day we started texting a lot. It's been 9 months.. I don't know where exactly we stand.. We talk and meet up sometimes but we haven't talk on this top...
A. 28 December 2016: Sorry but he isn't that into you. Find someone who will break down the door to be with you. Throw this minnow back in the pond.... (read in full...)
How can I make this work, with her? We both need to lose weight, but her motivation is waning.
Q. I want to be fit. I want that for my girlfriend too. So does she. She complains about how clothes look on her. She is very attractive but could be in better shape. Obviously, I’m on board. She is all talk but little action. I tried to make i...
A. 28 December 2016: Running isn't for everyone. Some say it will ruin your knees by time you are 40. Gym doesn't suit some people either. Cycling or walking are good exercise. Some like swimming but I find swimming in a pool boring. I think the bottom line is to find ... (read in full...)
Is it wrong for a man to look at and flirt with women other than his significant other?
Q. Is it wrong for a man to look at and flirt with women other than his significant other? Why or why not?...
A. 28 December 2016: It depends on the flirting. It also depends on where and who else is present.
A bit of harmless flirting makes the world go round. It can make people feel good about themselves. It won't be taken as a serious suggestion of something more.
Howev... (read in full...)
Should I continue this? Let him visit and spend more time together? Or is it sounding too unhealthy?
Q. This is a hard question for me to put out there because it involves a relationship I am in with someone I really like and care about. However, I have made so many unhealthy choices in my past and I don't want to do that anymore. I think some...
A. 27 December 2016: I think you could let the relationship develop a little and see how it goes. Then at some point you need to talk about your concerns.
My stepdad used to go to the pub every night before he got married. It was more to do with company than drin... (read in full...)
Do you guys have any advice on how to stay confident and keep myself afloat when living in a world that doesn't deem you as beautiful or worthwhile?
Q. So I'm a 22 year old gay guy and I've never had a boyfriend or any sort of relationship in my life. I always used to think that I would only share myself and my body with someone I love and care about (At least when it comes to firsts like first ...
A. 27 December 2016: I believe you need to concentrate on your life. Your predilection for finding love has led you into a side of gay life of which I can only speak of third hand. I have heard their is a culture of casual and immediate sex which many men find ... (read in full...)
Am I behaving like a stalker?
Q. Stalkerish or Nah? Ok so..... I'm curious as to what people think. Grateful to anyone who reads this longness.... I just want to give perspective. I dated someone for about the last 7 months..... He was great, we were great, things were coo...
A. 24 December 2016: I accept that you acted from the best of motives but I think you ought to stop now. He has made his feelings clear hasn't he. Get on with your own life and leave him to his.... (read in full...)
What does it mean to say a guy is "sharp"? is such a guy shy or just cunning?
Q. Dear Aunts, So I heard that he is "Sharp" and is good with the ladies. But he has been staring at me for weeks now and not making a move. So is he shy or just cunning? what you think?...
A. 22 December 2016: No, what do you think? Your intuition should be telling you something. To describe someone as sharp never means shy. If he is cunning and not just 'sharp' are you a match for him? ... (read in full...)
Should I worry that his first love is making contact?
Q. Hi my husbands first love is trying to get in contact with him. He's not sure yet if he will reply to email. I'm not sure how I feel about this,on the one hand I want him to do what he wants but on the other I'm a bit concerned about feelings being ...
A. 21 December 2016: I think it is rather sweet. It has been thirty years. I think you should meet her with your partner. As long as there is nothing under the counter there is no harm - that is if you are confident your relationship is strong.
When he see her carr... (read in full...)
Why would my guy friend think I should continue to listen to him talking about his past relationships with other women? What should I say to him?
Q. Dear Cupid,my guy friend and I have been friends for a while and we wanted to take it to a next level but today we had a little spat it's crazy to me but it's whatever. Long story short he has a thing for high yellow complexed women and that's f...
A. 21 December 2016: I can understand that you a tired of hearing about his past women. It is very insensitive. All I can suggest is you give him one chance and make all clear, one chance only to tell everything, and then the topic is off limits for good.
No-one want... (read in full...)
My wife is not interested in group sex. How can I stop having an urge to participate in group sex? I need to stop these urges, but how?
Q. I have always fantasized about group sex. While there is nothing unusual about this, I'mean worried that the degree to which I want it is harmful. My wife and I have been married for twenty years and about a decade ago I decided that it was my o...
A. 21 December 2016: I think you should take some CBT. It is one thing to fantasise, but another to try and inveigle you wife into it. It will completely change the dynamic of your marriage and there will be no turning back. What you had will be gone, and you may not ... (read in full...)
I love her but don't know to what extent I love her
Q. I am facing a dilemma. Whether to marry, or to leave my girlfriend. I am inexperienced, and I need your opinion on what our relationship looks like to you, and what you think I should do. I also would like to hear what you think is important in a ...
A. 19 December 2016: I think N91 is probably right. You have wasted too much of this woman's time.
But, if you walk away from her never look back.
It sounded on first reading as if she were a good match. However your words are revealing: "If we were friends, I don't ... (read in full...)
Why am I ignored?
Q. Why were there so many cliques at the work christmas party last saturday? Im not in any clique... I Try to say hi and be polite..to all, am quieter at times but am (quietly assertive and am mostly friendly at work) some people ignored me ...
A. 16 December 2016: Are these really cliques, or just groups of people who get on? And if they get on why don't they get on with you? If you don't have any friends it's your fault. What is it about you that makes people not want to include you?
I think you can prob... (read in full...)
What should I say? How can I find out where I stand, without sounding annoying to him ??
Q. Hi!! Back in October a 5 month relationship ended because we decided to give each other a little space. On one weekend I went to an ex's house because he was having a get together with a few friends. Sketchy as it sounds nothing at all happened...
A. 12 December 2016: It looks like he has moved on. I think he would have got back to you after your admission of missing him if he were still interested.... (read in full...)
I need advice on our relationship. It seems like what I do isnt good enough. What should I do?
Q. So i am in a relationship with someone i barely know we have been together for rather 3 months. I proposed to her one night while i was drunk and ive been going with it every sense. I've introduce her to family and some friends as my fiance and sh...
A. 12 December 2016: Accept you made an error proposing while you were drunk and extricate yourself now. If you are uncomfortable with it now it will only get worse. Be strong for both of you. Cut yourself free.... (read in full...)
Dogs versus the Christmas with family? I'm so angry right now, what do I do? I'm 32.
Q. I'm so annoyed right now. I've invited my parents to my house for Christmas but they've declined because I won't allow them to bring their dogs. They have 3 huge dogs and I don't want them in my house. I cannot believe they would rather sit alon...
A. 12 December 2016: It sounds as if they are happier with the dogs. What can you do? Christmas is such a strain on families.
What happened last year?
I know pets become part of the family, but it sounds as if they are more important than kith and kin. Nothing ... (read in full...)
I'm hoping he's bi, because he could be my soulmate! What should I do?
Q. Okay so I posted on here before about a guy, and got some good advice and insight but there's an update now. Previously I met this guy in the gym I caught him starring at me around 3 times (and his body is better than mine so not the reason) ...
A. 12 December 2016: So - What can we help you with?
Carefully phrase your question as if, to quote Jeremy Irons in Margin Call, you were speaking to a small child or a Golden Retriever.... (read in full...)
I'd like to offer her some money, but not sure how she'll take it
Q. a girl moved into the apartment below me in the same building as me (unit of 6 apartments). she has 2 kids aged 3 and 5, throughout the year we exchanged numbers, talked about things mostly info about the apartment or how to fix something etc. ...
A. 12 December 2016: Why don't you arrange for a hamper and perhaps a couple of gifts for the children to be delivered anonymously? Nothing could be simpler by internet.
Then you can do the Santa thing properly by denying all knowledge of where they came from.
... (read in full...)
I trust my boyfriend, but this girl makes me a little nervous. Opinions?
Q. My boyfriend is going out all day with his "bestfriend" who is a girl today (they've never done that before but they have hung out) and he never told me about it or what they were going to do. I found out because I looked at what he was typing o...
A. 10 December 2016: Yes, he is being insensitive. You need to ask him if your position was reversed would he be quite happy with it. It may be, because of his youth, he doesn't have the same level of commitment as you. You might have to suggest to him that if he isn't ... (read in full...)
Feelings for my late husband's brother
Q. Hey, I am in a messy situation and not sure what to do at this point. I would like to make it less complicated, and I have no clue how to proceed. My husband passed away almost over a year ago from an accident. I was fortunate enough to be lov...
A. 9 December 2016: It seems to me that you both have feelings for each other and have acted with respect to each other. If the option of happiness with this man seems realistic then grasp it with both hands. You have already shared living space so anything onlookers ... (read in full...)
My partner is dismissive of thngs that are important to me
Q. Hi all, A quick one. My partner and I seem to be bothered by different things (or he's not bothered at all) and it often sees him accidentally dismissing what I deem as important or not meeting my needs. This has lately come to head twice. ...
A. 8 December 2016: He will never change unless he realises there are consequences. This is a situation a lot of couples face.
You have to decide how important the issues are, and set limits.
If he either can't or won't meet your requests then what do you do? You ... (read in full...)
Is my boyfriend a narcissist?
Q. My birthday is today and my boyfriend has gone out of his way to make me feel bad and start arguments with me. It's beginning to feel like he enjoys ruining every special occasion. Do you think he's a narcissist? We were texting each other yeste...
A. 8 December 2016: Oh dear the writing is on the wall. Why endure this? Unless there is some very good reason why he is being so obnoxious you will be better off with a magazine. At least they don't berate you!... (read in full...)
We've never met but after three months of chatting she says she loves me
Q. There is a woman whom I met online, who lives in another country. We communicated for quite a bit of time without meeting in person. After about 3 months of emailing, and one Skype call, she told me she loved me. She asked how I felt. I said I liked ...
A. 8 December 2016: Yes of course it is strange. You know it. You are being groomed for something. Don't know what yet.... (read in full...)
My new boyfriend likes to 'be in control' sexually
Q. hey everyone . Ive just started seeing my new boyfriend we spoke about lots of stuff how we like and dislike things in bed . He told me he likes being ' in control ' in the bedroom slight bondage stuff and various other stuff i havent tried . ...
A. 8 December 2016: I think you should be worried about him. It is one thing to get into a bit of bondage if that turns you on. It is another to want to film it - I mean, why would you if you are going to immediately delete it?
Only do things you want to do. I have... (read in full...)
My supervisor is shattering my confidence
Q. Hi all, I need your help. I was working for a company for two years and my supervisor was so abusing, I leraned that 6 people left before me after few months however I tolerated for 2 years and was doing extremely well. I was really overwhelmed one ...
A. 7 December 2016: You don't say what you do. Is it a job in which you are supposed to be able to take the pressure? Are you being tested to see if you can hack it?
Otherwise what would be the reason for her trying to knock your confidence? You have only just got ... (read in full...)
I like the boy, and I don't want to lose my friends.
Q. Hello,Im 16 years old.Me and my friends are like a close team and we are close to each other. We are really often going out and having an amazing time. Im the newest member in the "gang". They are trying to keep the "love" stuff outside of the team ...
A. 7 December 2016: When you get a boyfriend it often means other relationships suffer, sometimes just temporarily. People prefer to spend time with their date than 'the crew'. Could it be possible to combine the two, some time with him and then other times with the ... (read in full...)
My relationship is completely boring and dead but I don't see a way out..
Q. I been with my gf for 3 years. I see her for 1-2 days every week or two. Usually the fun for her wears off after few hours, how she treats me when I arrive to couple hours later. She never really does anything for me anymore, any cooking. I have to ...
A. 6 December 2016: It is better to throw away three years, if you want to look at it that way, than continuing this charade. Your relationship has run out of steam and there is no indication she wants to rekindle it.
It is time to call it quits while you both have... (read in full...)
I like her in 'that' way but she has a boyfriend and I'm not in a position to date right now either. How do I stop myself from falling for her?
Q. Over the last year or so, I became good friends with this woman I work with. We get along really well, but I don't see or talk to her often outside of work, or anything like that, though. I think I'm starting to like her a little more; actually, ...
A. 6 December 2016: I am struggling to understand your situation. Why are you not in a position to date?
That aside, you pretty much answered your own question. So I'm afraid it's cold showers for you until you are available.... (read in full...)
How can I stop being addicted to love?
Q. How can one make love not so important? It seems that I'm always thinking about love (I'm single) and thirty 32 but ever since I can remember it's always been 90 percent of my life- I've lost jobs for men - I've gotten into arguments with my family ...
A. 6 December 2016: The best advice I can give you, or to anyone for that matter, is, 'Know What You Want'.
Don't settle for what comes your way. You must be more choosy. If things go wrong then learn from the mistake - because it was your choice! Don't blame the univ... (read in full...)
My relationship is really, really troubled!
Q. hey yesterday my partner started an argument about me spending £3 on a game i knew it was a pointless argument which is why walked away i stayed in another room away from her she was adamant she was right to shout at me for this and said she was not ...
A. 6 December 2016: Trying to unpick your post was not the easiest thing. Essentially I think you and she need to go to mediation.
This should take place in a calm neutral place where you can put your points of view calmly, and be listened to.
You can get free hel... (read in full...)
Facing dental work and afraid I'll have a nervous breakdown!
Q. This is going to be a very hard night for me. I have always been obsessed, literally obsessed with my teeth. Yet, cursed with bad genetics, so despite my taking care of my teeth I have had fillings and veneers since I was a teen... even earlier. I ...
A. 6 December 2016: It's going to be fine. These days no-one should feel any pain at the dentist's. I imagine your abscess is on a molar or premolar, therefore the gap won't be very visible after the extraction. Were it to be at the front there are options to disguise ... (read in full...)
Told him to forget it - he's married. Now I've change my mind
Q. OK, an old acquaintance, we coincidentally met in a new town, and had sex for two nights. We spent the 3days hanging out together. We parted as we went back to our respective towns. He called me for a chat everyday, claiming that he missed me. O...
A. 5 December 2016: You know, Aidan's right. This one is taken. Why did you bed him in the first place? Was it because it was easy? I think you are a better person than this. Your role isn't to be the other woman.
Perhaps you and he needed each other that one nigh... (read in full...)
Was this meaningless or is J trying to get me to notice her in some way?
Q. I have a friend who lives abroad and we talk a lot on Facebook. I went over there to visit her and met her friend who didn't speak much English (codename J). We were all out together and had a good time, but the language barrier could be an issue...
A. 4 December 2016: Where is this going to go? Is there any point in pursuing this? Can you see either her or you changing countries? What is the best that can come out of this? I think you may be flattered by the attention but seriously, does this have any future?... (read in full...)
How should I approach this issue? I feel that my wife is ashamed of me
Q. I have been married to my wife since 2001 (15 years now). One thing that has always bothered me is how while I introduce her to all of my friends I only get to meet some of hers. She is a lot more social than I am and has a lot larger social ci...
A. 4 December 2016: Your wife can say what she likes but it is definitely an issue for you and one that needs addressing. Have you explained how upset this makes you? What was the response?
I can appreciate a person wanting a piece of his life separate from his part... (read in full...)
Like him but he has a girlfriend
Q. I've been talking to this guy for a while now. It's been going really well and then he asks me on a date. However, we didn't be go on it because I found out he has a girlfriend. I've said I can't do this and we shouldn't talk. The problem is,...
A. 3 December 2016: Tell him you will consider more with him when he finishes with his current girlfriend.
Then log him off.
YOU wouldn't want to find out some other woman had been chatting up your boyfriend behind your back would you?
So you like him. That doesn't... (read in full...)
How do I get over this rough patch?
Q. I feel so down today. I had no one to share it with so I came on here. I guess it's just a couple of things that have got to me. I have been working full time for a year, and this December within 3 days my whole months salary has gone leaving me ...
A. 3 December 2016: Yes it's true. You are being over-generous, and then doing 'poor me'.
There might be something else going on too.
Do you suffer from SAD. This is a bad time of year for anyone who has ever had a problem with depression.
If this might be you... (read in full...)
Does he just want into my trousers?
Q. Hello there, Iv been talking to a boy I love for a few months now and we've been out together but he lives away from me, it's all being going great and he told me he loved me and it was going so well. He's now said that I don't make him Happy and he ...
A. 2 December 2016: This boy hasn't the maturity to be in a relationship with you. He isn't ready for it. You have to detach yourself to stop getting hurt more.
He hasn't committed to you in the same way as you seem to be prepared to commit to him.
So put him to o... (read in full...)
Facing dental work and afraid I'll have a nervous breakdown!
Q. This is going to be a very hard night for me. I have always been obsessed, literally obsessed with my teeth. Yet, cursed with bad genetics, so despite my taking care of my teeth I have had fillings and veneers since I was a teen... even earlier. I ...
A. 2 December 2016: Well it it is what it is, but it isn't as bad as you think it is. I have had several implants. There is no pain. I can't say it is a pleasant experience, but considering the alternative, false teeth, it is worth it.
There is a period of time whil... (read in full...)
Giving it another chance
Q. Hi guys, I'm in a bad situation at the moment and have never felt so hurt before. I've never really trusted my partner 100% and I was correct for that as I found that he had the intention of sleeping with somebody behind my back which is extremel...
A. 30 November 2016: What you have to understand is that the relationship you had is finished. It's over. It will never be the same again. You know that don't you?
The question for you both is whether you are able or even want to build something new together. A lot of t... (read in full...)
My ex says she wants to be with me but won't leave her new boyfriend
Q. What should I do? I dated this girl for a long time , we broke up she got a new man and now has an baby she says she loved me and wants to start a family with me but I tell her when shes going to leave him and her answer is I dont know dont ask...
A. 30 November 2016: Clearly you can't wait forever for something that might never happen. Tell her you are moving on.
If you want you can give her a month to split from her current partner. I don't think it will make a difference. You are just plan B in case her curr... (read in full...)
How do I get over my former friend's betrayal?
Q. Hi, How do I get my lying, cheating friend out of my head?? I was conned and lied to by a girl I thought was a friend of mine just so she could take my ex (we were on a temporary break)! I totally trusted her but she ended up ruining my life, wi...
A. 30 November 2016: You have to take a conscious decision to not care.
If you must console yourself do so in the thought that the pair probably deserve each other, and be grateful she took him off your hands.
All this enmity you are harbouring is, as they say, lik... (read in full...)
I'm cheating but there's only one life
Q. I'm a guy who is happily married in a long term relationship. While sex can sometimes be an issue between us- she has a very low sex drive- and it's often a discussion/argument that we have, it's not so bad that I would consider ending the ...
A. 29 November 2016: If your wife isn't into sex in the same way as you would she be happy to let you make other arrangements? The French seem to be more comfortable with this sort of thing than the British. It seems unfair to be deceiving your wife and yet I can ... (read in full...)
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