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1 June 2017: GET out there..It might be terrifying,but you need to broaden your social horizons.Go on line,join a club or go to a speed-dating night You will not find love in your living room.REVAMP your image;Ask a good friend to appraise your style.Do you need ...

CatFish, and tips to keep you safe

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10 May 2017: CatFish,has nothing to do with either Cats or Fish.As you will probably know a person male/female who will put a fake profile on dating sites....and will contact many people or maybe just one and have a relationship be it ...

Nora B, Sharing thoughts on observations about life and struggle

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22 October 2016: In this day and age when trains stations are crammed with people,coming and going,roadways are congested with traffic. Meeting deadlines maybe at the cost of ones job. Emotions have taken a backseat,love and friendship are something to be ...

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I don't understand why she wont just delete her profile from online dating sites!

Q.   It's hard to know where to start, and I know this will turn into a long post so I appreciate anyone willing to read through and offer advice. I've been in a long-term-relationship for about six years, we're the same age. When things are good,...

A.   8 July 2017: This is a very sad situation for you to allow yourself to be in.When trust is gone from a relationship there is no love.Now you state that she never cheated on you .Well what do you think she is doing on all those dating sites ? please answer this ... (read in full...)

Should I make the first move second time around?

Q.   Hey everyone. I joined a dating site back in Jan. and had just got chatting with a nice guy but he did inform me he was leaving the site because he was going to see how it would go with someone. I’m still on the site and recently he's come back on. ...

A.   24 June 2017: First of all while on site talking to you ,he left the site,telling you he was going to work it out with someone.Now he is back on site....and viewed your profile,but did not mail you.I would not consider it a good idea to mail him first...because ... (read in full...)

Is getting back with him a vain hope?

Q.   Hi everyone, I have a question regarding an ex that I am still in love with. We broke up in March. He said he "wasn't in the right mindset to have a girlfriend, I have to sort some stuff out" and "this doesn't mean we can't get back together." ...

A.   22 June 2017: Yes its so painful and hurts so much when the person we love finishes the relationship....believe you me we have all been there.However i do understand where you are at at the so very difficult to handle and sad.Now i want you to take a ... (read in full...)

How can I get hime to be more romantic?

Q.   I'm dating a guy for almost a year and he isn't the romantic type. He's said he's not a mushy type about 6 months in so I pulled back a lot and decided to move on. After two weeks apart he texted me and called wanted to try again. Still the same no ...

A.   22 June 2017: The situation is not every man is romantic...and he seems from your letter Not to be romantic...that is just the way he is...he cannot help it.Move on and find a warm,loving ,romantic man,otherwise you will be very unhappy and he will not understand ... (read in full...)

I'm married but cheating with my old flame and I'm hopelessly in love

Q.   I went to a reunion and as soon as I stood in front of my old flame I knew. I hadn't thought of him in 40 years. I'm happily married and live a plush life. He never married. Even though we live in Different states we've been together twice And...

A.   12 June 2017: Treasure your good husband and family and the many wonderful years you all had and have together.Sometimes Hills are greener far away.On no attempt put your marraige at risk.As you stated he is your ex-boyfriend from the past.So leave him in the ... (read in full...)

What do I do? I feel I can't trust him anymore after what's happened.

Q.   Hi I've been in what I thought was a happy relationship for the past 3 and a half years. A couple of weeks ago I went on my Facebook and seen he had became friends with 2 women. I asked who they were and he denied he had added anyone. I had my s...

A.   5 June 2017: This is very sad for you after 3 and a half years.He does not deserve someone like you.When trust is BROKEN in a relationship is is very difficult to trust that person again In his case he was unfaithful on you with one woman,maybe two.DO NOT WASTE ... (read in full...)

I'm not sure about his response. Please help.

Q.   I went through a rough break-up with my ex' two years ago and it's ended in a court case. I have a hard time trusting people now but for the first time in a while someone has caught my eye, and for the right reasons. He isn't my usual type and he'...

A.   3 June 2017: If a man wants to ask a woman out he will there is no man to shy to do that.You have been friendly and have asked him cannot do anything more.It would be wise to let him come back to you.Do you know is he in a relationship.because you ... (read in full...)

Drunken fumble, was what the guy did normal making out or was it more than that?

Q.   I was at a party recently and we both were pretty drunk and horny, and started making out and it turned into a very intense one. He started moving my hands all around her body including my breasts and my butt, and cupped my breasts and butt ...

A.   31 May 2017: I do hope for you this is learning experience for you.You were lucky and safe this time.Please remember a drink or two is fine......ALWAYS REMAIN SOBER.....that way you will know who you are with.[2] What they are doing to you.[3]How far you want to ... (read in full...)

I made a fake account and my boyfriend chatted with it!

Q.   i made a fake account recently and send request to my bf...and he asked who s this and then i started talking to him by telling fake family nd fake profession and all..he shared all his personal details with me he even send his pictures to me( fake ...

A.   26 May 2017: To create a FAKE PROFILE and FAKE FAMILY is not how you deal with your own mistrust of a person.In any relationship there has to be trust of each other.It is always most important to be Honest at all level.If you find you cannot trust someone ..MOVE ... (read in full...)

I'm not in love with my husband. Do I tell the man that I do love my feelings just to get it off my chest?

Q.   I am married to a wonderful man, and have two teenage children. But I was never in love with my husband. About 10 years ago I became very close to my doctor,he was unmarried, we never told each other how we felt but I know we both knew. I feel in ...

A.   25 May 2017: This is a very difficult situation for you to be in.Did you ever hear the old saying....Hills are green far away.Years ago you made the right decision to stay as you stated with your lovely husband and children.In life there are many different types ... (read in full...)

Do you think our relationship go anywhere?

Q.   I have been talking to this guy for nearly 4 months who I met online. We are from different states, would be a 10 hour drive there. Originally, I was only talking with him for something to do, casual flirting here and there, nothing serious. He ...

A.   17 May 2017: Well yes he certainly likes as you stated he would not be in contact with you every day.First of all a word to the wise..a long distance romance at the best of times is difficult and i note you stated that he was still studying,and may not have the ... (read in full...)

Am I asking too much? Can I trust him?

Q.   My boyfriend and I have been fighting a lot over the last 3 months. It started as I was nitpicking at him and I think it was due to my parents divorcing and me desperately wanting him to be there with me. I live at home with my Mum and brother and ...

A.   16 May 2017: When two people are in-love,at the best of times its difficult.We expect the other person to be 100% prefect all the time and to respond to our individual needs and when this does not happen..we are hurt,disappointed and wonder what is ... (read in full...)

Jealous of my girlfriend's sexual experiences

Q.   I feel a bit silly really. I've been in a great relationship with a woman for several years now. She's fun, kind, understanding, we share a lot of common activities like music, cycling, swimming, travel, and she has really helped me develop - and ...

A.   14 May 2017: Reading your mail,i understand that you have a wonderful relationship with this why spoil it.. the past is gone and just a memory.Look to the Now and the Future and continue to enjoy your special relationship.So many of us wish we did this ... (read in full...)

My grandmother died and I've lost my job

Q.   I'm not one to ask for advice but I really need some. I've been under a tremendous amount of stress and I'm not sure how to cope, I feel like everything is crashing down around me. On January 10th my grandma who I was really close to died a...

A.   16 February 2017: This is a very difficult time for you,and the passing of your beloved grandmother was and is difficult for you to come to terms with.However you have asked for help and that is a positive start for you.So would you consider counselling, to deal with ... (read in full...)

I am 61 and living with a man who's sought my approval to go out with other women. Is this acceptable?

Q.   I am 61 years and /i nnnnnnnnnhave this man I met on a dating site last year it is coming up on a year we became friends on Facebook and chat and text almost daily. We have not met in person yet but he had asked about the possibility of moving i...

A.   7 February 2017: This is a very hurtful situation for you to be in.Please understand this man is a user and had no feeling for you or in fact for any woman who he will meet.You will notice ALL is on his terms,do not allow this man to do this to you.Best advise i can ... (read in full...)

Has this man gone cold on me?

Q.   Hi, I've been dating this guy for about 3 months now. He asked me to be his girlfriend on our third date. We get on really well and can actually have great conversations on our dates and through texts (he only likes to text as feels anxious ca...

A.   5 February 2017: This is a very hurtful situation for you, and i do understand how you are feeling.However for your sake it would NOT be wise to approach him at all,because as you stated when you suggested meeting up..he ignored you So do not put your self in a ... (read in full...)

Boyfriend's excuse didn't cut it with me

Q.   So my boyfriend of 9 months didn't come to my sister's wedding yesterday. I was annoyed to start when he said he couldn't come a month before the wedding but when I heard his excuse I was more annoyed. I don't get on well with my family and ...

A.   5 February 2017: I can understand,why you are annoyed,and disappointed that your boyfriend did not attend the wedding.However maybe he does not like weddings.[2]Or it could be as you have made him aware that you do not get on with your family,he thought there could ... (read in full...)

Our marriage is totally devoid of all physical contact!

Q.   I am writing to you because I feel I have no one to tell. I have been married for 20 years to a woman who is the mother of my three children (19, 17 1nd 12). We haven't had sex since before the birth of our youngest child and its killing me. In f...

A.   28 January 2017: This is very difficult for you and very hard to handle.You seem a very kind ,caring man,and i can also understand the reason you decided to go to sex-workers.However this is not the is only make the situation More difficult to handle and ... (read in full...)

I need to let go of the past. Can someone give me some advice on how to do that?

Q.   Me and my significant other have been in a relationship for 5 months, however, I've been in love with her (the love was for the most part unrequited) for about 3 years. We've started to plan a future with each other. But recently, we dis...

A.   22 January 2017: This is a difficult situation for you to be in and as you must let go of the past before anything can progress,and on this level you are quiet right. However would you consider sitting down with your girlfriend and have a very open ... (read in full...)

Inside I can be calm and logical, yet I cry too much. Any suggestions on how to control my reactions?

Q.   I'm 25 and my boyfriend is 27. He's my first serious relationship since college and for some reason, I cry all the time which I've never done before. We have a great relationship but when there's even a slight issue, I cry. I don't cry on purpose...

A.   21 January 2017: As you stated this is your first serious relationship,and it very important to you.Its not always easy getting to know someone at the start,and sometimes we misunderstand the situation and get into a your case you cry.You are a very ... (read in full...)

Boyfriend lost his job, became depressed and now won't speak to me!

Q.   I'm in a pretty bad situation. I dated a guy for 6 months long distance and were very serious- he met my family, I spoke to his, our parents talked- we were on the marriage track. 4 months into it he told me that he was unemployed. It threw me for a ...

A.   9 January 2017: This is very difficult for you, and in all you have done your best in understanding him.going with the flow to suit him.I can also understand why you are confused,because this guy is giving you mixed signs.Be gentle with yourself..WISH THIS GUY ALL ... (read in full...)

He still has a dating profile up ...

Q.   My new boyfriend ( of 2 week ) still has a dating profile online , hes open about it and says he has 'friends' on there . should i tell him he needs to prove theyre friends by showing me the conversations hes having or demand he deletes his profile ...

A.   9 January 2017: As you stated your new boyfriend of 2 weeks,this is a very short time.Right now do not do anything,because if you do he could very well deceide that he is not happy being told what to do.A relationship is build on friendship and above all Trust.Now ... (read in full...)

How can I help my autistic brother have a normal life?

Q.   I would like some advice on what to do when you're autistic, aware of the way you differ from other 'normal' people, but still want to have a normal life that involves getting a job and a partner? I am asking on behalf of my brother because ...

A.   28 December 2016: This is a most difficult situation for you when you as a Normal person look at the situation re- your brother. But the question is ....WHAT IS NORMAL.... this is a most overrated term.What is normal for one person,maybe not be normal for another.I ... (read in full...)

I am having difficulty with my girlfriend's son

Q.   Hi guys, im 8 months into a relationship with my girlfriend and things are goin great with us, we have such a laugh when we are together, but im having a very hard time warming to her 12 year old son who lives with her, sometimes hes fine but most ...

A.   27 December 2016: I can understand how you feel,and maybe the problems you might have if you move in with your girlfriend.First of all you are right now very wise to be Aware of what could arise in this situation.But because you are Aware,this is half of the problem ... (read in full...)

It's now 2/3 days, is he uninterested? Should I just leave it, or pursue him?

Q.   Hi, I work with a guy I really fancy but was unsure if he was interested in me so I backed off. Co-workers have been trying to set us up for the past 6 months but I know he's incredibly shy. He's always asking where I'm going out at at the week...

A.   27 December 2016: Its difficult when you fancy someone and they are slow to react to you. However no matter how shy he is ,he if wants to will get around to ask you out .So all you can do is respond to him in a friendly,warm,cheerful way,and hope for the best.It ... (read in full...)

Why do some men say things to their partner the man thinks may sound supportive, and yet concurrently they collect pictures of women and porn?

Q.   I know this might seem a dumb question but it's bothered me in a lot of relationships I've been in as I've noticed most guys seem to do it and think it's no big deal to lie about it . Why do some men say things to their partner like 'you're the only...

A.   25 December 2016: Because inside every man there is a little boy.Did you ever hear the old saying ...BOYS WILL BE BOYS...and that what you are dealing with.There is another old saying.THERE IS NO HARM AT LOOKING AT THE MENU.....meaning men will look.Yes i can ... (read in full...)

In a committed, passionate, loving relationship. Am I wrong for feeling 'put down' or like a 'one night stand'?

Q.   Here are the basics in order to fully understand my feelings about this situation: I am a 35 yr old male and she is 34. We have been in a committed relationship for a year now. We have a what we call "remarkable" relationship that truthfully ...

A.   25 December 2016: First of all ,i can quiet understand how you must have had strong feelings over her remarks.[which i am sure they were not directed at you]As she stared into space, she must have had a flash back to her past,and her unhappy sexual encounters with ... (read in full...)

How can we slow things down? And why does he keep slipping out?

Q.   Ok, so, After messaging and chatting to my guy, we both agreed to meet . I really like him, he likes me too. We get on so well, laughing, relaxing and enjoying each other's company. We arranged a few more dates, there is definately a spa...

A.   1 October 2016: Thanks for the follow-up much appreciated.Hope everything will work out for you.Regards NORA B.... (read in full...)

How can we slow things down? And why does he keep slipping out?

Q.   Ok, so, After messaging and chatting to my guy, we both agreed to meet . I really like him, he likes me too. We get on so well, laughing, relaxing and enjoying each other's company. We arranged a few more dates, there is definately a spa...

A.   1 October 2016: First of all this has nothing to do with your parts,so have no worry on this level.However if this situation continues,he may have what the call ..Erectile Dysfunction..this is the medical term used when a man is unable to hold an erection for full ... (read in full...)

How can we slow things down? And why does he keep slipping out?

Q.   Ok, so, After messaging and chatting to my guy, we both agreed to meet . I really like him, he likes me too. We get on so well, laughing, relaxing and enjoying each other's company. We arranged a few more dates, there is definately a spa...

A.   30 September 2016: It is lovely to know that you both have such a loving relationship,and he is very lucky in that you are understanding.However this can happen a man at any age.There may be many reasons for this to happen[1] Is he on any sort of ... (read in full...)

Will I ever love someone the way I loved my ex?

Q.   I broke up with my boyfriend years ago but I thought about him a lot and he's only just got a new girlfriend after 4 years. My question is is it possible that I won't love any one as much as I did him? As this ever happened to anyone else tha...

A.   28 September 2016: This is a painful situation for you after all those years.But Yes Yes this situation has and is happening to many many people.We all have a special old love in the past that no other person can hold a candle to.Treasure it,but remember it is in the ... (read in full...)

My fiance is disrespectful to me. Do I make him jealous?

Q.   My fiance has been disrespectful to me. Whenever we argue, he quickly storm up and get out from the room. But while he is nice, hes so thoughtful about me. I feel he has avoidant personality and doesnt have much empathy. He is not used to be l...

A.   25 September 2016: I ,think you should sit down and thank your lucky stars,that he has the wisdom to leave the room,and leave time between you both to calm down after arguement.Because both people can say lots of hurtful in the heat of the moment,which cannot be taken ... (read in full...)

Is it selfish if I get mad at my boyfriend's appearance and silly behavior?

Q.   Is it selfish if I get mad at my boyfriend's appearance and silly behavior? Once he joked about we're having budget marriage with other bridegrooms in a ballroom. He also joked about the pressure of marriage in front of my friends. He said marriage ...

A.   25 September 2016: Reading your mail,it seems that you do not even like this guy anymore, never mind love him.The magic of love does not always remain As time goes on [1] you will either grow together or[2] grow apart.There is no one to blame here,its just ... (read in full...)

How am I meant to deal with and understand his total neglect?

Q.   Hi, there's this guy [14 years older my senior but really fit and good looking]living in an adjacent country and coming to my city for work 3-4 times a year. We have known each other for about 3 years now.. The night before last night he told he...

A.   21 September 2016: You are not in the wrong at all,so do not worry on that level. He is the one in the wrong,and he should contact you.Would you consider to wait for him to contact you,i know it might be difficult for you to do that.Maybe it might be the best thing to ... (read in full...)

Husband constantly nagging and critiquing

Q.   My husband is constantly nagging and correcting. He is a generally likeable guy but when he gets close to somebody like wife or kids he critiques all the time where it sounds verbally abusive. He sees very little wrong with himself. He has a lo...

A.   20 September 2016: Its very difficult to listen to nagging all the time,and it is also very unfair.However your husband,is feeling.[1] That he is not the main breadwinner[as you earn the most money][2]You have a masters degree....he has not.There is no doubt that he ... (read in full...)

I feel sad that he lost all interest. What can I do to avoid this happening again?

Q.   I need some advice! A few months ago I started a relationship with my housemate but it didn't work out, and I'm worried it's because I freaked him out and made him pull away. I'd love to know how best to move on and learn from this. So we were onl...

A.   17 September 2016: First of all this has nothing at all to do with you.At the start he showed interest ,because he just wanted sex...and nothing more.Would you consider asking him to leave and find someone to share,because its very difficult for you to be living in ... (read in full...)

My weight gain makes me feel he might stray

Q.   I've been with my husband for 18 years, we were high school sweethearts and married when I was 22. We have 4 kids together and love a very comfortable life. We have a good relationship , we argue like any normal couple but we don't have any huge ...

A.   16 September 2016: Yes i can understand the way you are thinking,its not always easy to keep to a strict weight plan.However would you consider walking extra every day,maybe join a gym,and perhaps eat smaller amount of food,not alone will you feel happy for ... (read in full...)

Is it really wrong to pay for sex

Q.   I have reading the many posts on dearcupid from men who are contemplating paying for sex. I see that most people are against it, like it is the lowest a guy can go. I am at the lowest point in my life now and it will only get worse. I have Marfan ...

A.   15 September 2016: That just is...You will only paying for sex and maybe very disappointed with the experience.A MAN/WOMAN first experience should be..that you are not just having sex..But making LOVE.There is a huge difference,so try and get to know and like some ... (read in full...)

The sex used to be mindblowing and not it is not. What could be possible reasons for this ?

Q.   I have been with my man for 13 years. In beginning our sex was mind blowing ! And over the years it has gone up and down ! But the last couple of years he doesnt think he should do anything . Well when it is time to have sex then he is up fo...

A.   15 September 2016: That is one of the many things that a woman will think.[1]He is making love to someone else[2]He does not find me attractive anymore.[3]If he masterbates .This is a super sensitive issue for any man and also difficult for any woman to ... (read in full...)

My married BF doesn't want his wife to know about us until he has removed all his belongings from his former home. Seems he cares more about his belongings than me. What should I do?

Q.   Ok so here is my dilemma I am 29 dating my friend who is married he is 30 and his twin brother who is also 30. Ok so how this happened was I just recently moved back home and I ran into an old friend of mine that I have had a crush on since I ...

A.   15 September 2016: It is often very difficult to meet up with an old boyfriend.However his feelings for you must have not been very strong for you first time round,otherwise he would not have marries someone else.Now he is a Married man,and cheating on his ... (read in full...)

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