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Boyfriend and I worked for same company. He got fired and is now pressuring me to quit

Tagged as: Dating<< Previous question   Next question >>
Question - (29 August 2021) 9 Answers - (Newest, 1 September 2021)
A female United States age 30-35, anonymous writes:

Hello,

I have been with my partner for almost two years, were engaged.

I work for a pretty good company I actually got him hired were I worked. I have been with the company for 3 years. The company I work put me in a manager training class when I first started for a year due to me having a Bachelors degree.

My partner has A G.E.D. he stated he could do my job better than me. He probably could but his attitude is poor. I am very respectful to my supervisors.

My partner stated that after a year he they should promote him to my level. He stated that he was to good for the job he was doing.

I understand but I worked hard for my degree it took me six years, my father died my senior year of college and I worked a part time job.

He then told the Regional Director that he was jealous that I have the title I do. He then went on to ask for my same job title again. They told him no. When he was working for them I did give him tips on how to get a manager position fairly quickly. He said no every time.

Fast-Forward: My job told him no to the promotion he wanted. He then called me crying and stated he was going to quit on the spot. I told him to at least put his two weeks in. He did, an hour later he called his boss and asked if he could take back his two weeks they said no.

He then began to state that the company treats me way better etc. He then said he was going to raise hell in his last two weeks.

He then began to make smart remarks to his boss and leave early. A few days later the senior area director came in and fired him.

Since, then he has been pressuring me to quit. I like the company I have worked hard to be where I am at. I did quit the company two months ago before all of this came out for a better paying job. I hated the new job and I called my old my boss and they were glad to have me back.

View related questions: engaged, jealous, my boss

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A male reader, kenny United Kingdom + , writes (1 September 2021):

kenny agony auntI have to question why you are actually with this guy?. His is pompous, ego driven, and total disrespect to you and all around him, and is not a team player.

This is not the way to get on in business and be successful.

Should you quit because he asked you to?. Of course not that would be a stupid decision to make as he knows if you quit you will be back to his level.

carry on doing what you are doing as you are a success and you are dong very well.

Also you may want to ask yourself if this guy is really right for you. In my opinion he is far from right for you.

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A female reader, Alwin South Africa +, writes (31 August 2021):

Alwin agony auntHe's clearly envious of your position, he thinks he's better and smarter than you but he's clearly not, or at least doesn't have the soft skills that you have. The company dumped him because they saw he's no good, when will you? This guy does NOT even like you, if he did he would want to see your good, he's a selfish pr.. who's happy to be with a woman he thinks is his inferior so he'll feel better about his mediocre self.

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A female reader, Anonymous 123 Italy +, writes (31 August 2021):

Anonymous 123 agony auntI don't really know what you're asking here. Are you asking if you should follow this idiot's orders and quit the job that you love or are you asking if you should leave him?

Quit- No. And I don't think that as a professional young woman who has worked hard to be where she's at right now, you should even be wondering about this.

Leave him? Absolutely. He's a loser.

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A female reader, Anonymous 123 Italy +, writes (31 August 2021):

Anonymous 123 agony auntI don't really know what you're asking here. Are you asking if you should follow this idiot's orders and quit the job that you love or are you asking if you should leave him?

Quit- No. And I don't think that as a professional young woman who has worked hard to be where she's at right now, you should even be wondering about this.

Leave him? Absolutely. He's a loser.

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A reader, anonymous, writes (31 August 2021):

Is this really a situation you need advice on?

He only wants you to quit, because he's envious of you; and his ego can't stand the fact you're in a management position. He screwed-up royally, and wants a management-job just dropped into his lap. How entitled is that?

BTW, why is a guy like this still your boyfriend?

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A female reader, Tinacandida United Kingdom +, writes (31 August 2021):

Tinacandida agony auntYou obviously are well thought of in your job. Dont quit. Jobs that you are good at and enjoy are few and far between. He is jealous. He sounds like he has some problems. He will hold you back. Do what is best for you and if he holds you back and tries to manipulate you then hes not a very good man to have in your life. If you quit you will regret it.

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A female reader, Tinacandida United Kingdom +, writes (31 August 2021):

Tinacandida agony auntYou obviously are well thought of in your job. Dont quit. Jobs that you are good at and enjoy are few and far between. He is jealous. He sounds like he has some problems. He will hold you back. Do what is best for you and if he holds you back and tries to manipukate you then hes not a very good man to have in your life. If you quit you will regret it.

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (30 August 2021):

Why on earth are you letting this loser sabotage your career? One you have worked really hard for and sound as if you are good at? You know, I don't know of one man who has put his own career that he likes and worked hard for in jeopardy for a relationship.

The fact that you are associated with someone who behaves this way will reflect badly on you.

He sounds like a narcissist. A male who cannot stand a female doing better than him. He will behave in an atrocious manner all of his life, he can't 'see' other people nor does he have any remorse for behaving this way, so why do you want to compromise your happiness and your career for this (excuse me) prick?

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A female reader, Honeypie United States + , writes (30 August 2021):

Honeypie agony auntYikes!

Your BF/fiance is a total tool! He "thinks" he can do a better job than you -why? Because he is male? Because he is smarter than you?

Apparently, HE doesn't understand that promotions are mostly EARNED, not just giving like participation trophies!

YOU are happy at your job. Why should you quit? What point would there be to that?! You worked HARD on your degree and it has PAID off when you got a job and a promotion. Because you actually KNOW what you are supposed to be doing, not just "winging it" like your BF.

You are LUCKY that your company is NOT lumping you in with your immature, pisspoor work ethic, self-righteous, entitled pompous ass of a BF/Fiance!

Dear OP, DITCH this man!

He thinks YOU are an idiot. Anything you can do, HE can do better... except he can't. He doesn't have the education OR the attitude to learn and improve. He EXPECTS to just GET what he wants - including promotion and title. And when he didn't - HE cried, threw a fit, and created drama in the workplace!! and wants YOU to quit!

So what? You can be jobless together? So he can PULL you down to his level of stupidity?

"He then began to state that the company treats me way better etc."

OF COURSE, they do. You know how to work hard, you know how to be a team player, you KNOW what you are doing. You have social skills and manners. AND a degree. HE, on the other hand, acted like a spoiled toddler!!

WHY are you with this guy?!

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