| Latest articles: Just Two
This question has 3 answers by readers of DearCupid.ORG.
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31 March 2011: I recently read something nice that I would like to share.... JUST TWO. Donate blood twice a year. Donate your eyes after death. Thank God twice a day. Write two letters a week. Visit two ailing people a month. Say two words of gratitude-"...
A little humility goes a long way
This question has 7 answers by readers of DearCupid.ORG.
Newest answer was posted
27 March 2011: I’ve been a moderator here on DC for a while and it’s a great forum. It really irritates me though when the OP shows no regard for the aunts who’ve taken time to answer questions. We moderators don’t know you, yet we spend time poring over ever...
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He asked me out as a joke but I said yes ... how do I face my friends?
Q. My crush asked me out as a joke and I said yes. I was sick the day after and I wasn’t at school. My friends texted me about it. Apparently he had told most of my friends. Now I have to go back to school. I don’t really like him a lot. I just ...
A. 18 October 2018: Two can play at this game. If he said that he was joking, your say the same thing. Laugh it off when people ask you about him and say, "did you guys really think I was serious? How silly! Did you really think I would say yes to him and mean it?... (read in full...)
I said yes when he proposed but I worry it wasnt the right answer.
Q. Hi, I've been with my boyfriend for 12 years and live with him. I've had some problems with my boyfriend for a while, maybe a year. He stopped being romantic and didn't go on dates or ever go out to spend time at the weekend with me. He woul...
A. 18 October 2018: 1.) He changed his ways... And I bet it's only for a brief while .. when you threatened to leave him and start dating other men. He knows his limitations, he knows that you're too good for him and he probably himself wonders why you've been putting ... (read in full...)
How do I get over my co-worker? I have made sacrifices she wouldnt make and I know she doesn't care about me
Q. I apologise in advance for rambling but I wasn’t sure how to explain things. It’s been a long time since I last felt the need to ask for advice online but I’m desperate. I can’t talk to any of my friends because I’d be breaching confidentiality ...
A. 16 October 2018: You're letting your feelings cloud over your judgement. Let's get some things in order here. This woman is straight, doesn't like you very much and you stand absolutely no chance with her. This in itself should be enough of a deterrent. You're ... (read in full...)
I'm willing to leave my husband but my married lover isn't saying anything about leaving his wife
Q. Iv been having an affair for a couple of years now and decided to end my marriage. I'm living with a friend but my married lover is still staying put. I said it was my problem about leaving my husband but he said he was still worried for me. He ...
A. 15 October 2018: Men don’t cheat with the intention of leaving their wives. For them it's simply sex or an arrangement where two consenting adults are having an amazing time, without attachment or commitment. In his mind, he has justified his actions as no big deal ... (read in full...)
Engagement called off due to past relationship how do I fix things?
Q. I was engaged to a wonderful guy.He is a virgin and have very high Morales and values.However, i lied to him about my past relationship and virginity. Engagement called off due to videos and pictures of sexual activity and intimate ones,ta...
A. 14 October 2018: I'm thinking more along the lines of what action you can take against the creepy ex. He's crossed a line, he's basically blackmailed you and has circulated private sexual vide of yours. There has to be some legal provision that deals with this jerk. ... (read in full...)
I know he's had sex with others before being in a relationship with me but it bothers me that he lied about his "first" sexual experiments
Q. I have been in a happy relationship with my boyfriend for 8 months. we are very open about our past relationships and both of us accepted everything about it and continued. so trust and respect was the major factor in our relation. we have a very ...
A. 9 October 2018: Maybe you are not fine with the fact that he's slept with other women. You think you are not you're not. Perhaps it was different when you just started dating and sleeping together but now that you're getting closer, you're starting to resent him ... (read in full...)
My wife's adult children are bums whose lifestyles I pay for.
Q. Hi all, I have a problem. First off, I've been married for over 21 years. We largely get along -- mostly because I don't complain about much. During that time, I have raised my wife's 2 children from her previous marriage. They are cur...
A. 6 October 2018: Your marriage has been a marriage of convenience for your wife because (a) you were never a priority; you were a god-sent option for her to not live life as a single mother and (b) while you were providing for everything and married to your wife, ... (read in full...)
My wife's adult children are bums whose lifestyles I pay for.
Q. Hi all, I have a problem. First off, I've been married for over 21 years. We largely get along -- mostly because I don't complain about much. During that time, I have raised my wife's 2 children from her previous marriage. They are cur...
A. 6 October 2018: I don't get it... You've been in these kids lives as long as they can remember and yet you blame your wife for what they've become? I'm sorry but this is just not possible. You're leaving out information conveniently. You also say that all this ... (read in full...)
I'm not comfortable seeing him if he is going to date other people.
Q. I have been dating/talking to this guy for only 3 weeks. We have been in on a few dates and I have stayed at his house also , things seemed to be going well. So I found out he took another girl out on a date but he doesn’t know that I know , and I ...
A. 6 October 2018: Just tell him that. Exactly what you've told us... That you're not comfortable with him dating others simultaneously and if he's not treating your dating/the getting-to-know-each-other period as exclusive, then you'd rather not see him any longer. ... (read in full...)
Struggling to get over ex and finding it hard to look at dating again!
Q. Hi all, I guess this is a slightly multi-layered problem. Firstly I am single as of close to year ago. I mention this as I feel it potentially explains certain things as of yet mentioned. It was a strange breakup that never really had clos...
A. 5 October 2018: Personally I don't understand what people mean when they say closure. I don't believe there is anything a person who has dumped his/her partner can say to make things better. And somewhere down the line you knew that things weren't exactly going to ... (read in full...)
Cheated on my boyfriend 2 weeks before getting pregnant help!!!
Q. I am 24 years old and found out I was pregnant about 3 weeks ago. I have been with my boyfriend for 5 years and thought things were fizzled out, I looked for company else where. I have never cheated on him before and can’t believe I did it this ...
A. 25 September 2018: What is most surprising is that everyone's going on about you and your boyfriend and no one's saying anything about the little person who's taking life within you! For heaven's sake spare a thought for the baby!! This is not the best way to bring an ... (read in full...)
My wife wants to use a sperm donor to ensure that our third child isn't autistic but I’m not sure how I feel about this.
Q. My wife (34f) and I (36m) have been married for just over six years and in many ways have an ideal marriage and are very much still in love. Despite two kids, we still have sex 2 - 3 times per week. We still find time for getaways nearby beaches, ...
A. 19 September 2018: If both you and your wife are not on the sand page regarding this then there is no way you should go ahead with it. Because if you look at it the way it is without any sugar-coating, it will just be your wife's baby. Not yours. You will basically be ... (read in full...)
My fiance is a virgin but I've slept with 6 people and had an abortion. Do I need to tell him all this?
Q. Hi, I am engaged to a wonderful guy from the last 5 months, we are going to get married this December 2018,I came to know by investigation and inspection and his views and thoughts and actions, that he is a virgin and he is against premarital sex ...
A. 19 September 2018: Don't tell him anything. You're starting a new life and while you've done nothing to be ashamed of, your fiance might not see it like that. The guys you've been involved with are probably living life unscathed and there's no reason why you should ... (read in full...)
She owes me money but is adamant she transferred the money!
Q. Hello This is not so much a dating question or anything, but I have used this website before for advice and found it helpful. A girl I have been on and off chatting to asked me if she could borrow £1000 to repair her damaged car. I agreed...
A. 17 September 2018: She's obviously lying and you've been fleeced.
Do you know where she stays? You need to somehow contact her and ensure that you prove to her that you haven't received the money. And as aunt honeypie says, contact a lawyer. The amount is too big ... (read in full...)
DId I ruin a good thing by commenting on his social media and being petty?
Q. Hey guys, I'm in a dilemma with a guy. So the beginning of August, I start talking to this college athlete that goes to the neighboring school. Everything is great, affection, attention, dates, sex and spending time. Until about a week ago, he pos...
A. 11 September 2018: I personally think that he's being a tad overdramatic...I mean this is really no great reason to break something off just like that. But then it goes to show you what you mean to him and I think whatever happened was for the best because at least ... (read in full...)
My boyfriend wants me to help support him as he tries to strengthen his knee!
Q. Hello I would like your opinion on this. My boyfriend and I are in a long distance relationship. We live in the USA, he lives in the East Coast, while I live in the West Coast. We've been together for about three years. My boyfriend injured himself ...
A. 5 September 2018: Don't give him a single penny. His story is as dodgy as his knee and there is no way your should fall for his brazen shamelessness.... (read in full...)
Does this indicate that there is more than a friendship or just nothing to worry about?
Q. Ok so my boyfriend has a female friend which happens to be his accountant but he told me they are also friends,they around the same age group, he is older than me, when my bf did his housewarming get together he invited me and my family plus his ...
A. 5 September 2018: Well I wouldn't worry. While she's obviously interested in him... Doesn't take a rocket scientist to figure that out... He's not. And that's what is important here.
Look you can't stop someone from falling for you or looking at you a certain ... (read in full...)
Is it unreasonable that I don't want to know about his personal masterbation habits?
Q. I hope this question is not too vulgar. It's actually quite personal and embarrassing but I'm not sure how to handle my situation most effectively without some advice. I'm sorry for the length. It's a two part question i guess. A few weeks ag...
A. 3 September 2018: If porn is a touchy subject for you and your ex has given your grief over it then why on earth did you want to bring it into your bedroom with the new guy?
OP I don't know if you realise it or not but you're trying to self-sabotage your relation... (read in full...)
After one date his messages have become short and infrequent. Should I give up?
Q. I connected with a guy on a dating app and we hit it off. We seemed to be on the same wavelength, there seemed to be a lot of chemistry, a real attraction. We continuously messaged each other. We arranged to meet and counted down the days. The ...
A. 1 September 2018: I'm jumping in late but I'll add my two cents. I've said it many times before here and I'll say it again...if a man likes you and wants to be with you then nothing and I mean nothing can stop him. Do you remember that episode of Sex and the City ... (read in full...)
Turnng 30 and getting itchy feet about passionless relationship
Q. Hi, I don't know what to do or how to feel. I have lived at home with my parents until not long ago. I was always a good kid and studied hard and didn't go out partying. I've bought a house and moved in with my partner of 10 years. I have bee...
A. 24 August 2018: You know what they say... Why buy the cow when you're getting the milk free?
You've bought a house with him and living together so basically you're his wife without it being legal. You're cooking, cleaning, sharing a bed, finances, responsi... (read in full...)
My husband slapped me on the face because he didn't like what I was wearing and I wouldn't change
Q. 3 years ago, i thought i met the love of my life. I've been in the US for 4 years, since I've been working there i met this man, we got into a relationship and after 1 year, he proposed to me. I was madly in love with him. Since we got married, he ...
A. 6 August 2018: You're not convinced by what your parents are telling you and you're asking strangers on the internet for permission to divorce this guy?
Yes please, in that case!
He hit you... He could very well keep you locked up next to avoid men lookin... (read in full...)
I rejected my ideal guy years ago, and now he's with someone else and it's driving me crazy. Help!
Q. Hey, I'm writing this partly to get it off my chest and partly because I need to change something about this situation, even if it's just my way of thinking about it. 5 years ago I was single, much more stupid than I am now, and met a brillia...
A. 30 July 2018: Yes, it's a terrible idea.
It's not up to you to decide how Ben's relationship is and if it's platonic or romantic. You're being very judgmental of him and his girlfriend and just because you want what you can't have gives you no et to spoil so... (read in full...)
We moved in way too quickly and now finances are breaking us apart
Q. Hey all.. Before I start, please don’t include judgement saying I shouldn’t be living with him yet, it’s too soon to have introduced him to my daughter, etc. So, my boyfriend and I have been dating 6 months. We moved in together rather quickly ...
A. 27 July 2018: When you ask for advice on a public forum, don't start off by dictating what not to tell you. Why don't you want to be told that you moved in too quickly? Because it's the truth and you already know it and just want it to slide by?
Well you know... (read in full...)
My friend never has time for me anymore since she started dating. Do I walk away?
Q. Not sure if anyone on here can help but I wanted some advice about a friendship. One of my best friends has recently become very distant and so reluctant to see me. I've been trying to arrange to see her one weekend for several months but I jus...
A. 26 July 2018: The friction here is because you don't think that your friendship should change because of her relationship with a guy while your friend feels that you don't understand that she's busy now that she has a man in her life who takes most of her time. ... (read in full...)
In love with someone else whilst in a relationship with someone I am not in love with
Q. I've been in a relationship with my boyfriend for 10 months now. We get on really well as companions and friends, we really care about eachother and are affectionate. I know he loves me and i feel safe with him. The longstanding issue has become ...
A. 25 July 2018: I think first things first, you need to break up with your boyfriend in the nicest way possible because it's not right to treat him as a safety net. You know that's the right thing to do. Your heart says so, your instinct says so, and that is ... (read in full...)
How can I approach an actress for an autograph when she's unfriendly?
Q. I’m going to see a favorite theater show at the theater in 2 weeks,. I’d like to say hi and get a photo with 1 of the co actors at stage door after. she’s known for being cold/unfriendly and aloof. She’s very talented and has a sma...
A. 21 July 2018: Why do you want to approach her in the first place when you know that she doesn't like interacting with people and is, as you say, cold, unfriendly and aloof? It almost seems like an invasion of privacy! Why is it so important for you to ... (read in full...)
He treats me better than my exes but I keep finding he tells lies!
Q. I've been dating a guy for 3 months now. He treats me better then all my crappy exes did and seems to really care about keeping me around. The problem is that he's lied to me about a few things, and often tells me that he feels like he's walking ...
A. 20 July 2018: Why are you with him if you don't trust him? You're driving by his house just to check if there's anything fishy going on because your gut said so? Do you realise that he's not the one looking creepy right now?
Look, I think he's no more than an i... (read in full...)
I don’t know how to move on! Advice?
Q. I still love him and can’t move on.? We broke up after almost 2 years because I tolerated his abusive behaviour, emotionally and verbally. I broke up because I couldn’t take the nasty words and he said he wished I died. A week later he texts me...
A. 18 July 2018: Sweetheart you may have just had the luckiest escape of your life. There is nothing and I mean nothing worse than being with someone who abuses you. Abusers make you feel small, worthless, useless, unloved, unlovable and then you start questioning ... (read in full...)
Everyone tells us moving in together after 2 months of dating is too soon!
Q. What's the consensus for knowing when you're ready to move in with someone? My boyfriend and I have only been dating for a little over 2 months, but we see each other every day (we work at the same company), spend hours/weekends at a time togeth...
A. 16 July 2018: The only thing that 'bothers' me just a little is that you are co-workers. More than the two months thing.
You see each other every single day. I know you're not even remotely thinking of it not working out but God forbid something goes wrong and ... (read in full...)
After years of neglect, my teeth need dental care! Is this how I go about it?
Q. Hi guys... I think this is more for support as well as advice. I've been on before about this topic but a new angle this time. So I've now got a boyfriend and one major issue I had was I hate my teeth. It's because of years of neglect ...
A. 13 July 2018: Yes OP, this IS the first step. Even if the dentist says, wow that's bad, so what? Logically tell me, so what? He/she will still do your dental work! They don't know your, they will be know you beyond just being another patient and you will soon be ... (read in full...)
Why couldn’t he understand that I needed his emotional support that day?
Q. Monday was a sad day for me. I lost my job and broke up with my boyfriend of 4 yrs. Although I'm not too worried about being able to find another job, it still is not a happy event to be let go... I called my boyfriend and he sounded shocked ...
A. 13 July 2018: Well there you have it then. He's not made any effort to give you what you want the most... His time. And guess what, it woudn't have changed in the future either because he doesn't see it as a problem and doesn't even want to understand why it ... (read in full...)
Why couldn’t he understand that I needed his emotional support that day?
Q. Monday was a sad day for me. I lost my job and broke up with my boyfriend of 4 yrs. Although I'm not too worried about being able to find another job, it still is not a happy event to be let go... I called my boyfriend and he sounded shocked ...
A. 12 July 2018: Whatever happens is for the best OP.
You'll find a much better job and in this moment of adversity, you saw the true face of your ex boyfriend. "A friend in need is a friend indeed" is something that we were taught as kids and you can see for ... (read in full...)
She only wants to be friends but acts like we are more?
Q. This is a complicated issue that has really affected me mentally. I've been friends with this girl since secondary school and we have always been pretty close, we got closer as we moved up to college and since becoming close friends and spen...
A. 6 July 2018: Oh please OP, no one is as naive as this girl is pretending to be. I don't believe that people need to be told what boundaries are... It's something that you just know. Inherently.
In this case, the girl in question is plain and simple playing ... (read in full...)
My ex has I have slept together too many times!
Q. My ex and I go to the same college. We see each other a lot considering we have many of the same friends. We broke up two months ago because I was stressed out a lot, and he was too about school and things happening with his family. But rece...
A. 4 July 2018: I think it's a bit of everything. You're bored, you're still not over him, seeing him reminds you of the time that you had together and the fact that you've been lovers in the past makes you comfortable which is why you end up sleeping with him over ... (read in full...)
I found out my fiancé lied about his education. Now what?
Q. My fiancé and I were recently engaged. We have been together for two years. He moved here from out of state shortly before we met. He told me and has always said that he graduated from University A. According to him he attended University B for ...
A. 3 July 2018: Ask him immediately. You should know why he lied to you and he better have a good answer! He's going to great lengths to cover up his lies by changing his resume each time but then that's the thing with lies... One lie leads to another and before ... (read in full...)
I cheated and want to fix my relationship, but how?
Q. My boyfriend and I have been together for two and a half years, since I was 23. He is a wonderful person. I love him, he loves me, and we've always worked so well together. We've never had any problems beyond whose turn it is to do the dishes. ...
A. 3 July 2018: You don't love your boyfriend, I'm pretty sure you have a narcissistic personality, and you cheated knowing damn well that it would lead to sex because that's exactly what you wanted and you went for it.
I think right now you should break up... (read in full...)
Is it for sure that I will get a green card?
Q. I got a divorce 3 years ago because my husband was emotionally and physically abusive. I have a 4 year old daughter, and i always do my best to sacrifice the best for her. I live in the middle east, and i always have to go to Texas, USA for months ...
A. 28 June 2018: As the male anonymous uncle pointed out, it's difficult now because Trump is very particular about immigration from Islamic nations - what with the travel ban and everything- and what you're planning might be an uphill task. Speak to someone who ... (read in full...)
Am I mean to delete all our photos from his phone?
Q. I plan to break up with my boyfriend but I don't want to let him know until I delete all our photos together from his phone. Am I mean to delete all our photos from his phone? I never wanted to take pictures with him in the first place because I ...
A. 26 June 2018: I'm the only one who's going to go against the majority I guess. I'm not proud to say that I did this once. The guy in question was a jerk and although the photos were not questionable in the least, I still didn't want him to have them. By the end ... (read in full...)
I ask women I sleep with about their opinion on abortion because I don't want kids. How do I know the girl I'm seeing is on the same page?
Q. So I met a wonderful girl online and we hit it off really well. We kissed on the first date, had lunch on the second, and ended up sleeping with each other on the third when she invited me over to her apartment for pizza and a movie. We used ...
A. 22 June 2018: I somehow find this to be very strange. Do you have any idea what an abortion entails for the woman? If you don't want kids that strongly, get a vasectomy or use condoms every single time or just abstain. Or else be prepared to pay child support ... (read in full...)
I'm worried he still has feelings for his ex.
Q. Is he really over his Ex? Me and my boyfriend have been together 2 years now and I thought we was both the happiest we could be. Last night he went to show me something on social media and his ex girlfriend was at the very top of his search bar I...
A. 18 June 2018: Yes, it looks like he's not over her. I'm sorry OP, this must be awful for you but it certainly looks like he's still hung up on her.
The question is, what do you want to do now?... (read in full...)
Should I give both of us another chance? Or not bother?
Q. Hi everyone. I have this ex who i was with 2 years ago. We met and everything was great so much that we moved together in 3 months so we could be closer, he lived in another city. From that moment on he gradually changed and was becoming cold, ...
A. 16 June 2018: Trust your instincts because if you feel that nothing has changed then it hasn't. You know at some level that it's going to end in a disaster yet again. You know what they say...fool me once, shame on you. Fool me twice, shame on me.
... (read in full...)
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