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| | *erberus_Raphael's profile:I see love everywhere and I see it as a chance for peace. With love, there is a happiness because real, strong love, is a truly benevolent emotion. The archangel Raphael is god's healing. Through God, do I find inspiration to at least try my best to guide others to the peace they seek. I turned to god when I had no where else to go and I found something I could trust in and believe in when I felt cold hearted and angry, the very same way people feel when they trust in the ones they truly love.
If anyone is wondering, the very symbolic nature of Cerberus is important to me. It signifies a time in my life was my liberator and destroyer, I was pushed to the brink of sanity and pulled back, all because of a complicated form of love. But it made me stronger and wiser and now I seek to spare the broken the same physical and emotional pain I felt once before. I was an awful, intolerable, intolerant, heartless and destructive young man before I found a form of peace. As much as I want to help those in need, as much as I like to think that what I say may bring a smile or hope to one's life, I need to remember that what I do here is for my own sense of redemption.
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| Latest articles: International Day of Tolerance
This question has 8 answers by readers of DearCupid.ORG.
Newest answer was posted
16 November 2010: I am sure there are some who know what day the 16th of November is, and I am also sure that there are some who don't. The 16th of November was declared the 'International Day of Tolerance' and its purpose is to spread peace amongst all races and ...
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Move Forward or Move out
Q. So my story goes like this. My girlfriend and I started having some major problems around March of 2010, which culminated in May. We were having alot of trouble because she was generally unhappy with her job, and kept bringing problems home. After ...
A. 16 December 2010: Technically she did not do anything wrong. She was depressed and her mind and heart were broken which is why even though she knew it was wrong, she could not resist it, the momentary pleasure of sex. The pleasure she found with 'Dan'. She lied to ... (read in full...)
Can I save my marriage before it's too late...or is it?
Q. I find myself horribly sad this holiday season. Thanksgiving was depressing, but as Christmas nears, I am racked with pain over my pending divorce. It has been a year since I confessed to having an affair to my wife. Since then, there has been ...
A. 16 December 2010: It is never too late to start trying. Marriage is sacred and should be fought for until the often bitter end. What have you done to make it up to her? What have you done to show her that you are sorry for having the affair? Are you even sorry for ... (read in full...)
Does my cousin like me? I need to know for sure!
Q. Hello to all. i have posted a question here. it was to know whether my cousin is interested in me. i have got 2 answers which tell me 50 % he likes you and 50 % he likes you but like a cousin. so i have still some doubt which i want your advice...
A. 14 December 2010: Aside from that comment about massaging your legs, all other 'evidence' is merely how a playful person would behave around others. That comment does raise suspicion but I think you might be over-analyzing all else, such as how he placed the bags, ... (read in full...)
I want to hold his hand, do I have to make the first move?
Q. i have a boyfriend. we have been dating since last friday and we are going on a date saturday. we are going to the movies. do i have to make the first move? i wanna hold his hand so how do i do that? another question is a month ago he said on a sca...
A. 14 December 2010: To your first question, you could always walk closely beside him and brush your hand up against his and see what happens.
To your second question, you can't. Some people are so masked and ever changing, especially at that age, he might feel one... (read in full...)
She told me to read a book
Q. Well me and my girlfriend are in a LDR, Anyways im going to see her for the first time since May in a week (yes we live very far apart)........Things have been a bit rocky this past month but as of lately we've really been back on the same page and ...
A. 14 December 2010: It is a charming story, I would suggest you read it just to show her that you actually listen to what she says and her opinions actually matter. There is no harm in reading a book anyway. Either that or you could watch the film, I would not suggest ... (read in full...)
Married, but I had a co-worker's baby, now what??
Q. I've been together w my husband for 81/2 years. I got pressured into having sex with a co-worker. I was too afraid to tell him no. (why , because he got mad at me if I didn't). Stupid stupid I know. I have always had zero feelings for this guy. ...
A. 13 December 2010: Running away from it all would be the harbinger of shame, not this. You need to invite truth and honesty back into this situation so you have to start by telling your husband about everything. As daunting as this may seem, as heart wrenching as it ... (read in full...)
I'm stuck in limbo!!!
Q. Hello, I have a real problem and I desperately need it fixed. It includes, relationships, dating, love and sex all in the one. About three years ago I met my first proper boyfriend. I had been innocent until him, I lost my virginity too, w...
A. 12 December 2010: If you have trouble trusting your first love, it is best to stay away from him unless you somehow see that he has changed. Stop dating, stop having sex for a while. Get your mind sorted first. In your life right now, there is debris of shattered ... (read in full...)
Troubled...
Q. I've been seeing my boyfriend for nearly six months and i am so happy, and i love him to bits! I went out with my friends a couple nights ago and i know this sounds incredibly lame and like i'm making excuses but i had a lot to drink and ended up ...
A. 12 December 2010: If you did just try and forget about it there is always the possibility that he would find out from someone else. You cannot always just avoid problems and expect them to disappear sooner or later.
If you love him, you have to trust him and trus... (read in full...)
I'm in love with her regardless if she's able to have kids or not!
Q. hi all can anyone please help me out??? im truly madly in love a girl. we used to work together, tho we were just good friends at the time nothing more. she left with her ten BF and had a child. approx 3 years later we meet up again through a ...
A. 12 December 2010: Simply tell her that you love her and the fact that she will not bear your children changes nothing. Tell her you still wish to be with her because you are happy with her now. You can figure things out later when the time comes because you ... (read in full...)
I'm worried that when I start to age, my 18 year old boyfriend will dump for a young hottie!
Q. I am a 32 year old woman. my boyfriend is 18. I love him like i've never loved another man. I'm just worried about the age difference. Men take longer to mature usually than women. I'm just so indecisive about this relationship and it's all ...
A. 11 December 2010: I just returned to this question immediately after I finished reading a comment by someone I believe to be you. Something about your boyfriend having a porn habit that has now birthed your insecurities. This I think you need to discuss with him, ask ... (read in full...)
I'm worried that when I start to age, my 18 year old boyfriend will dump for a young hottie!
Q. I am a 32 year old woman. my boyfriend is 18. I love him like i've never loved another man. I'm just worried about the age difference. Men take longer to mature usually than women. I'm just so indecisive about this relationship and it's all ...
A. 11 December 2010: Age is a mere number. Whilst your fears are understandable, give the man a little more credit. Why are you with him? Was it purely for his good looks or was is this truly love? He loves you now so you have nothing to worry about. You do know there ... (read in full...)
He was my first everything, and cheated. Where do I go now?
Q. My screen name says it all, I am hurt and unsure, and here's why. My boyfriend and I have been dating for 3 years, Im in love with his family, as he is mine and things between us has always been wonderful. We never fought, and he respected me for ...
A. 10 December 2010: Just tell him that you need to talk to him, face to face. Tell him what it is about and why, how you feel about everything that has happened. You need to understand each other so ask him when you are talking to him about why he did the things he did ... (read in full...)
I'm 14 and need to tell my parents I'm pregnant
Q. Okay, so im 14 and may possibly be pregnant. I have been with my boyfriend for a year and 7 months now. I've been on birth control for about a year and a half. Although, i stopped taking it 3 weeks ago because I am getting a new prescription. Me and ...
A. 10 December 2010: This is the best position you can be in to struggle through this situation. You have already started earning money to take care of your baby and I suspect your parents will help to lessen the worry your parents have, however barely.
Sit your par... (read in full...)
When he's good he's very good but when he's bad he's horrid!!!
Q. Hello x Me and my boyfriend has been together 2 and a half years, in the first 6 months everyhing was fine until his 21 year old sister (I'm 18 and he's 19 by the way) started butting in our relationship and spreading a lot of lies about me to he...
A. 10 December 2010: It may seem random but it isn't. Thoughts might have been triggered that led to him thinking malevolently about you. Talk to him and ask him why he is so cruel to you when you have done nothing wrong. Do not complain, talk gently, talk calmly and ... (read in full...)
Husband's comment "I don't support no bitches" has made me want to leave
Q. hello i been maried to my husband for 2 years now. I meet him on aol..though come to find out we had meet in the pass but I was married at that time..I have been a full time working mother just up until the thanksgiving holiday and got laid off. I ...
A. 9 December 2010: It is too late for that. His behavior, his reluctance to be a devoted husband is appalling and if it continues it will surely tear your family apart anyway. I am sorry to say this but I would suggest that you leave him anyway so that your young ... (read in full...)
Dating gone wrong
Q. hey, im so confussed i dont know what im doing wrong. when i met boys it never comes to a realtionship, we text,met up and do everything a couple do and then as soon as it gets serious boys always seem to just want to end it. its really getting me ...
A. 9 December 2010: Perhaps you are attracted to the wrong type of people. Try looking in a different setting. Perhaps the boys you meet are too immature for a serious relationship, they might try and avoid it out of some misguided fear of entrapment.
Don't think th... (read in full...)
I'm a widower who has fallen in love with my divorced sister-in-law!
Q. help me.i have fallen in love with my sister in law.i am a widower and she is the sister of my now deceased wife.she is divorced and we both have grown up children. i know that she also has feelings for me but feels that our love is wrong and will...
A. 9 December 2010: I understand why she may feel it is wrong. For her it may almost feel treacherous. Do not force it upon her. If you want her to accept this love, show this love to her, offer it, slowly and without any pressure whatsoever. Let her immerse herself in ... (read in full...)
Why can't I put this cheating abusive man out of my head?
Q. well, my story goes like this, im a single mother,hard worker good all around person i will like to think. i meet this guy many years ago when i was married and we were friends...many years went by and we got intouch about 1 month before he went to ...
A. 9 December 2010: Use this to cut him out of your life completely. Do not bother being friends with this abusive son of a bitch. Do not let him crush you like this. Once you are free from him, once you experience what real, caring, passionate men are like, your ... (read in full...)
I'm afraid of freaking him out if I say those 3 words!
Q. Ok so this is the thing, I have been in a serious relationship with this guy for 5 months already and we both have agreed that not only do we enjoy each others company but that our relationship is in good grounds so far. He is great and makes me ...
A. 9 December 2010: You must know how he would react. Would he really run away from you if you tell him "I love you"? Personally I think he might actually feel the same way anyway so telling him would just be a huge weight off of both of your shoulders.
You could ei... (read in full...)
Why does my husband need so much porn?
Q. Ok, here is my question. I have been married to my husband for five years and we have a 4 year old daughter and a 6 month old son. For about a year no matter when I tried to initiate sex he didn't want to. We were having sex for about 1, 2 times a ...
A. 8 December 2010: I think he might be addicted to it and yet reluctant to admit it as so many men are. He is making up excuses, refusing actual sex and basically finding as much time as possible to watch porn. It does sound as though he is addicted. Don't worry, it ... (read in full...)
Need positive advice on feelings for a married man!
Q. Dear who ever is reading this. I feel a sense of wrong. I've been friends with a guy for about 2 years. Our friendship was always quite flirty but I have quite a few quite a few male friends that are married or have girl friends and I've always ...
A. 8 December 2010: Try not to see him again until you deal with this. You are noble to want to respect marriage, remind yourself that you do not want to be involved in any way with a man who would so willingly cheat on his wife and risk ruining his own family just for ... (read in full...)
Will I ever lose the guilt of cheating?
Q. I had been dating my boyfriend for 4 months before i cheated on him. Our whole relationship was long distance, since he was a year older than me and in college. In March of my senior year of high school i went on spring break with a BIG group of ...
A. 8 December 2010: If you do show him how good of a girlfriend you can be, in time you two will move on. In finding redemption in both your eyes, he will think nothing of it because the girl who cheated on him and the wonderful girlfriend he has now are two very ... (read in full...)
Why is dating her so wrong!?
Q. My girlfriend is 15 and I am 19. We are not sexually active. Everyone is telling me it is wrong, but I don't know why. The only answers I have received so far are: -She is in a different part of life and we should have nothing in common. -I have t...
A. 8 December 2010: They do not and cannot understand. Mostly because at that stage of your life, it may appear to be quite a large age difference, which is why they think it impossible that you would share the same interests but, nothing is really wrong as long as you ... (read in full...)
I gave my husband everything and now there is nothing left of me....
Q. Hi everyone! I'm 25yr I'm a housewife and mother of 3 (3yrs, 2yrs and a 6m)have been married for 3yrs but been together for 6yrs with my husband...our relationship has been going through rough roads for the pass years mainly coz I feel neglected ...
A. 7 December 2010: It seems as though he is completely letting go of this marriage. Was he always this inconsiderate of your feelings? You did nothing wrong. All you did was try to be the best mother for your children and the best wife for him. Yet he still blames you ... (read in full...)
She says she has to live with her ex and sleep with him or he will take their child away
Q. well am deeply love with a girl and its mutual ,who has a two year old child.she'll living with the father of the child as she says he is black milling her which her sister confirmed to me!she says he will take the child if ever she leaves him and ...
A. 7 December 2010: If you love her and if she loves you, then yes it may be powerful enough to keep her strong. Be patient. If you two can make it through this, you both can be happy. You can at least be her friend when you get to see her and try to be there for her ... (read in full...)
What are my options?
Q. Okay guys I will try not to appear very pathetic on here even though right now I am very much feeling like it.First off I know my flag is American but I am not from there. So...here's my situation. I live in this town and no matter how much I go out...
A. 7 December 2010: Well who do you think will make you happier? You cannot base this on logic, it has to be from the heart on some level. Logically it would be Andrew since he is clearly devoted to the girls he dates and he is only 6 hours away whilst that other guy ... (read in full...)
I know I don't appreciate my wife enough and now she wants freedom
Q. I've been married to my wife for 16 years and we have 3 beautiful children 16, 9 and 1. I came home from work the other day and she told me we need to talk and she has met someone else that she feels close to and would like to take it further. She ...
A. 7 December 2010: Start showing her how much you love her! Date her, give her a gift. It does not have to be something grand, just something with meaning that shows her how much you love how she cares for your children and makes sure you are happy. Something that ... (read in full...)
She says she has to live with her ex and sleep with him or he will take their child away
Q. well am deeply love with a girl and its mutual ,who has a two year old child.she'll living with the father of the child as she says he is black milling her which her sister confirmed to me!she says he will take the child if ever she leaves him and ...
A. 7 December 2010: You can save up money somehow and then take this to court, or you can turn to the police. She is the mother of this child and they will surely side with her. She cannot allow herself to be blackmailed like this. She can take her child and run away ... (read in full...)
What would my strict parents do if I tell them I have a boyfriend?
Q. I'm a 16 year old girl and i've been in a relationship with my boyfriend (who is also 16) for over a month now. Our relationship is going quite well and we like each other a lot and we both think our relationship is getting quite serious. My pro...
A. 7 December 2010: Tennisstar88 has already given you magnificent options to consider. I would also ask that you think deeply about just how strongly you feel about this boy. Is it truly worth it? After all, your family are trying to take care of you and while I am ... (read in full...)
I thought she was my best friend, till she tried to steal my boyfriend!
Q. Today I found out that while my fiance now boyfriend and I were having problems, he went to smoke some weed with my guy friend and my best female friend, which I knew about and I don't touch the stuff but I thought oh fine whatever. My guy friend is ...
A. 7 December 2010: There is no need to bring this up to your friend. Just ignore her, she is not worth your time or thought. As for your boyfriend who you are supposedly in love with, what has he done to ensure something like this never happens again? Has he stopped ... (read in full...)
Stop and stare!
Q. Please read everything and help me out. Much appreciated! I am a black girl who happens to be attracted to any race of male, black, white, asian, latino, doesn't matter to me. An attractive guy is an attractive guy. I am a college-age girl a...
A. 7 December 2010: A lot of guys are very intimidated by beautiful girls. If you are interested in a particular guy, try and show him that you are and he might feel more confident. Confident enough to talk to you properly, without accidentally coming off as ... (read in full...)
I feel like he doesn't want to be friends...he just wants to harass me!
Q. I'm really confused! I broke up with my ex about a month and half ago. For a month we didn't talk but I really still wanted to have a good relationship with him as friends eventually. I knew it wouldn't happen right away but I wanted to make it ...
A. 6 December 2010: Trust your own emotions. No matter what his intentions are, the fact of the matter is that he is not respecting your wishes to remain distant for now. Whatever the case, he is only making matters worse and you need to make it clear that you have ... (read in full...)
He hit me! Did I deserve it?
Q. So I've been in a relationship with this guy for about a year and a half. I have a 7 month old child with him. I just moved into my own condo. He does not live with me due to his alcoholism. I was at his house visiting him and watching the football ...
A. 6 December 2010: You did nothing wrong. Do not let his actions corrupt your own view of yourself. You were caring for your child and he was foolish enough to raise his hand against you. Leave him.
I hope that helps.... (read in full...)
I have a problem with my OWN sexual history!
Q. Right, this is probably going to said really silly but hey! When I was abit younger I was quite promiscuous, and now I can say I'm ashamed of it, but now I am settled down and in a relationship and would never go back to my wild days... But for some ...
A. 6 December 2010: It is not abnormal to feel ashamed about one's past. We do all have things we are definitely not proud of but, that is no reason to assume you do not deserve love. Of course you deserve love.
You may feel ashamed, you are not wrong to be but you ... (read in full...)
Fiancee messed up bad, should I give her the chance to fix herself?
Q. Currently I am in a very rough patch in our relationship. We were engaged for like 2 years and in July she got an abortion. we both it was for the best. I was in college and she could barley find work and it wouldnt be a good time. She was the wi...
A. 6 December 2010: Treat her well. That is all you can do. Inside, though she might choose to hide it, her heart is brittle and on the verge of crumbling. Try to introduce her to the RIGHT crowds. She is more drawn to the lowly 'friends' because they are familiar to ... (read in full...)
Am I too young for this guy? Am I missing out on something?
Q. Three years ago, my father brought a man over to the house who he introduced to us as his colleague from work. He is 20 years younger than my dad making him now 35 and 15 years older than me. In present time, I'm actually about to turn 21 the end of ...
A. 5 December 2010: For now, you should both be content with the relationship. Children should come later when you are both sure of things. He may be ready but he has to respect that you are still unsure.
Whilst there is generally nothing wrong with this relation... (read in full...)
Could it be true love or something we need to let go?
Q. I met this guy when I was 14 he was 16 we dated for a year and broke up, but remained really good friends. 10 years later I still love him and he feel the same. The only problem is he is seperated from his wife, and I have a boyfriend. I have ...
A. 5 December 2010: Answer me this then, have you two been keeping in contact with each other all this time? Do you know for sure that you love him?
If you feel this way about him, why are you even with your current boyfriend? He seems like more of a burden then a r... (read in full...)
Can't buy me love!
Q. If you were a popular girl in highschool but you thought you liked a really dorky and unattractive guy who you've known all your life and he really likes you, would you go out with him? this is for a friend and i couldnt decide what to tell her...
A. 5 December 2010: Why not? If you like someone, nothing should stop you. Popularity in high school, or anywhere really, amounts to almost nothing so that is and should not be, a factor.
I hope that helps.... (read in full...)
With red hair and blue eyes, why haven't I found a man?
Q. I am 19 years old, and I have never had a boyfriend. I read things online about people my age not having boyfriends, but then their guy always comes when 'they least expect it'. I guess my problem is, I've given up, and stopped looking for one, and...
A. 5 December 2010: It could be a combination of your looks and your shyness. A lot of guys tend to be greatly intimidated by beautiful girls. That phenomenon combined with the fact that you are somewhat shy and hesitant to talk to guys could result in this dilemma you ... (read in full...)
I made a terrible mistake...
Q. I made a terrible mistake... I got together with my classmate, who was my best friend, and I really really liked him. But my relationship with my ex didn't end "completely" because he said he would come back to me later, and I thought about him ...
A. 4 December 2010: Stop your weeping and take a deep breath.
Be patient and give him more time. After a few weeks when all the wounds have had time to heal, you may seek friendship once more with him and gradually rebuild what was once there.
If you truly believ... (read in full...)
Slept with someone after husband abandond me now he wants back
Q. Several months ago my husband walked out on me and my kids. He abandond us and left us with no money and than tried to take my car and informed me to moved out of our family hom so i had to move across contry. I actually went without eating for a ...
A. 4 December 2010: He sounds manipulative and you do not need that sort of venom coursing through your life. He will draw you in only to tear you apart once more. Please, for your sake, leave him and ignore his apologies. What he did was an act of cowardice and you ... (read in full...)
He was my first everything, and cheated. Where do I go now?
Q. My screen name says it all, I am hurt and unsure, and here's why. My boyfriend and I have been dating for 3 years, Im in love with his family, as he is mine and things between us has always been wonderful. We never fought, and he respected me for ...
A. 4 December 2010: Instead of asking how YOU can fix things, ask how HE can fix things. How is he fixing things? How much effort is he putting into getting you back and rebuilding your trust and faith in him? Has he given up drinking completely?
Your family should s... (read in full...)
I gave my husband everything and now there is nothing left of me....
Q. Hi everyone! I'm 25yr I'm a housewife and mother of 3 (3yrs, 2yrs and a 6m)have been married for 3yrs but been together for 6yrs with my husband...our relationship has been going through rough roads for the pass years mainly coz I feel neglected ...
A. 16 November 2010: Is there anywhere you can go to be away from your husband? It sounds as though he has stopped caring about this marriage completely. Any family or friends that you and your children can stay with? If you do, you may be able to get a divorce.
I kno... (read in full...)
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