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... Send *vyblue a private message | | | *vyblue's profile:What qualifies me to help people…? Well to be honest I don't really know. I consider myself to be a life long learner therefore far from knowing everything. I believe the "outsider looking in" kind of advice can sometimes be the best because it can be the most eye opening and honest response that you will find.
Where do I live…? I sometimes wish I lived in the land of LaLa but for the time being I live in the Land Down Under.
My family makes me tick. They are my motivation for most things that I do choose to do.
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Any suggestions on how to deal with this angry and feeling-entitled stepdaughter?
Q. I have posted in 2013 about my husband having a child which he never knew off. She contacted my youngest daughter via fb and after having paternity tests done it was confirm it is his child. She is 34 this year. She was rude from the beginning, ...
A. 3 April 2016: Regardless of her being absent of a father she is behaving quite deplorable and in no way is that you or your children's fault. I can understand why your husband also feels the way he does. She is entitled to feel ripped off but again unless your ... (read in full...)
Was anything wrong with me? My Bf is my sexual partner but now he's saying he thinks I was not a virgin when we met.
Q. I was a virgin before I met my boyfriend. He found me too wet the other day when we had sex, like he just slipped in so easy I could feel it..so he claims i slept around or I masturbate but I do none of those things. He is the only guy I have ...
A. 2 April 2016: No there is definitely nothing wrong with you. Instead of being happy that he made you so sexually excited for him, he insults you. I think he's the masturbator, because he is acting like a wanker.... (read in full...)
Together 15 years and I've never cheated. How do I ask my partner about some health concerns?
Q. I have been having some health problems for two months now. Finally I saw a doctor yesterday who prescribed comprehensive blood tests, others just treated my various symptoms. I was petrified when I saw that he wants to test me for Hepatitis B ...
A. 2 April 2016: Too early to panic yet. It sound rather routine. Hopefully not, but if it was a positive result could it be possible to have contracted something like this through being in contact with contaminated blood. Something as innocent as performing first ... (read in full...)
Do you think he and his wife think they'll get back together? what should I do?
Q. I have been seeing a man who's 6 yrs younger than me and he's married with 2 kids but they are not living together. This is the second time they seperated. When I first met him he said he wasn't sure what was going on between them yet. They have t...
A. 2 April 2016: Sorry but you sound like his safety net. For me, being separated means stepping out of the relationship with the joint goal of reconciliation at some point not an excuses to be hooking up. If you are a true believer in marriage vows that bit where ... (read in full...)
I don't want to hurt him but we're not compatible. How do I exit this relationship?
Q. This is going to sound so bad but I really need help. There's this guy, a co-worker who came by my workplace as temporary. We got along very well and became friendly. He met my family due to his offering to help us shop for a home. My mom told me ...
A. 2 April 2016: Better to do it sooner rather than later when he is really invested himself. Just have to rip the band aid off and tell him you don't feel you are right for each other. Besides 12 year gap in age is not ideal when you are in your early 20's. Once ... (read in full...)
How do I ask my Mom for the package I ordered? It's a vibrator
Q. Okay I've been thinking about sex a lot and often. At my school and area it's not hard to hook up and I'm not like that,so I bought two bullet vibrators. My mom ordered a mouse pad for her computer and lucky me they came on the same day.... She got ...
A. 2 April 2016: You don't, order another one and have it sent to a post box.... (read in full...)
What do I do? My BF refuses to stop talking to a girl he had a crush on before meeting me.
Q. So I moved in with my boyfriend in the end of OCT . It was love at first meeting and a very quick move in together. He moved me in on his birthday of all things and said I was the best birthday gift ever. Well since then Ive had to wade through ...
A. 1 April 2016: He has crammed five years of being an arsehole in to just 5 months of living together. Fuck him off ASAP then tell Miss 30 seconds around the corner than since you haven't slept with her partner that ain't gonna stop you talking to him by telling ... (read in full...)
Should I be happy for my ex fiance after he cheated on me and hurt me so badly?
Q. About 3 months ago, my fiancé of 4 years ended our relationship. I would later find out he was cheating on me behind my back for about 2 weeks with a new woman at his work who he barely knew. I knew he met her and I actually knew her somewhat bac...
A. 30 March 2016: If you cant say it, I'm happy to say it for you....Ahhh FUCK HIM!... (read in full...)
I don't want to be fired but feel uncomfortable with what my boss is requesting me to do
Q. I started my job yesterday as an administrative assistant, at a private accounting firm. My boss told me today she wants me to call tomorrow a credit card company and be her and ask them to waive a fee for her. I feel kind of uncomfor...
A. 30 March 2016: Don't do it . Impersonating someone else is illegal- Plain and simple. You need to decide NOW just how you intend to set the standard of your professional integrity. Look at the big picture.. if for what ever reason things go pear shaped- who is ... (read in full...)
My boyfriend is a dad, and the child's mother hates me!
Q. Hey everyone thank you in advance for helping me I am having an issue here and need advice desperately. For the last 5 months I have been dating a great man who has a 4 year old son with his ex fiancé, a woman who he still remains close wi...
A. 29 March 2016: A woman using her motherhood as leverage to feel justified in such bitchy behaviour really is just so cringeworthy sad and pathetic. These type of women can be relentless in making it their personal goal to seek satisfaction in making your lives a ... (read in full...)
How is a move to a new area and a new school likely to affect a 13 year old boy who is not very outgoing at present?
Q. What do people think of moving a 13 year old boy to a new school in a new location? Would it be a complete disaster or would he adapt? The reason is that my widowed partner and I are nearing our mid sixties and want to downsize and relocate...
A. 28 March 2016: My advice would be to ask him. Talk to him together with his dad about the reasons you and him wish to move and the benefits of doing so and ask him his thoughts. Don't just accept a no without explanation because that to me is not reason enough to ... (read in full...)
My boyfriend seemed too interested in my friend during our threesome
Q. My boyfriend and I have been together for about 3 years and have had a great sex life with lots of experimentation as we both have high sex drives. He has always wanted to have a threesome so I, having had two previous good experiences with thr...
A. 28 March 2016: Something and someone new will no doubtably attract more attention. Not that I have ever had a threesome, but one of my ex's did and when asked if it was all that it was cracked up to be his response was "no, not really because he felt too much ... (read in full...)
I lost 42 pounds and gained confidence. Why are people now so mean?
Q. Hi guys. I'm struggling at the moment as I'm quite a sensitive person and I've always wanted to be liked by everyone. This means that sometimes I give people more effort or time than they would give me and I take comments people make quite perso...
A. 27 March 2016: Miserable people with miserable lives. it's just so much easier to point the judgemental finger at others when really they would probably benefit from getting a bit real with themselves. ... (read in full...)
We had a one night stand and now she is pregnant1
Q. We had a one night stand, and now a month later she's saying she's pregnant. I checked the condom after for holes and it seemed find as no water was dripping through. I wanted her to get an abortion as I'm sure she doesn't want kids with me an...
A. 27 March 2016: If you know where she lives, go see her. If she is not going to respond in anyway, keep the txt chat, get some legal advise and a court order to first see proof that she is and then to have a DNA test. In the mean time, sit yourself down and have ... (read in full...)
I try to love my friend's child but it's just so hard! He's incredibly rude and I hate spending time with him
Q. I'm not sure how to express myself on this one or even what my exact question is or even if I HAVE a question.... all I know is that I feel really bad about this. My friend and I have known each other for over 10 years now. Her son has just tur...
A. 27 March 2016: Your friend is well within her rights to parent in which ever way she feels right, just as you have the right to not be bullied by this little 'Damien' and it does sound like an uncomfortable situation you find yourself in. No, there is nothing ... (read in full...)
My ex-girlfriend is pregnant by another man and has asked for my help!
Q. How should I feel? My ex-girlfriend is pregnant by another man and wants me to take her to get a abortion? ...
A. 26 March 2016: How ex is ex? If it is a relatively recent ex and this dude is part of the reason you are no longer together then- Nope. If you are far enough removed from the situation and you ok with it then ,why not. It's pretty ballsy to be asking an ex for ... (read in full...)
I'm too shy in bed!
Q. Hi everyone. I'm in a relationship with an older man. This is my first serious relationship and its going great emotionally, and mostly sexually.. I have not had much sexual experience and am quite anxious and nervous when it comes to new things. ...
A. 24 March 2016: Hi There. I think first things first. That is, if he is an older man that knows you are inexperienced then he should be understanding and supportive as well as respectful enough not to be pushing you to try things more suitable to his sexual ... (read in full...)
Is it weird that my husband is a house husband?
Q. Hello! My husband's firm has recently hone bankrupt and he has consequently lost his job. So now I am the only one working. We have no kids, I own the house where we live and I own the family car. He owns nithing.My job pays reasonably well so we ...
A. 23 March 2016: I would LOVE a house husband, seriously I would. IMHO running a household is no different to any other job. You cook-Chef,you clean- Cleaner, you pay bills and run errands-Office worker, you fix things-Tradie, you maintain the garden- Landscaper, ... (read in full...)
I called my boyfriend's parents house several times and he reported me to the police
Q. I did something wrong today. Last night I got into a huge fight with my boyfriend because he never has time for me and always makes me feel second to everything. I was still mad and we argued again today. Not only did he not admit he was wrong, h...
A. 23 March 2016: I wouldn't bother with either. You giving or you getting. Walk away and look forward to finding a more suitable mate... (read in full...)
I fell for my friend and now I feel like a fool
Q. Hi! I've always had a thing for this friend of mine but we both didn't act upon it. A couple of years later we got back in touch and decided we will go on a date whenever we are in the same city. It was supposed to be 'casual' because he isn't lo...
A. 23 March 2016: Stop before you cross the line of no return. From what you write you are getting pretty close to it. I think it would be far worse if your friend felt obligated to 'tolerate' you out of friendship than to just accept that it is what it ... (read in full...)
My husband left me after 20 years of marriage saying he needs to be by himself
Q. Am I a fool He has left me after 20 years of marriage He know he has been treating the family badly He said he still love will look after us I will never be alone But need to be by him self Every one is in shock He away told every on...
A. 22 March 2016: Im sorry, that must be tough for you and your family. I guess it would be confusing to hear the words " I still love you, but can't be with you" in the same sentence. What make you think he has depression and that is the cause? Could it be a build ... (read in full...)
Should I help my son financially?
Q. My son is 28, and has basically never worked. I'm soooo disappointed in him, I can't begin to say. He hasn't spoken to me in over a year.He doesn't respond to phone calls, emails, texts, or anything. He thinks I belittle him because when I was i...
A. 22 March 2016: Why? What has he done but be a lazy bum. I take it you and your wife are separated but on good terms. If it were me and you feel generous enough why not give a little something special to her and do what ever it is that makes you happy with the ... (read in full...)
Can a man be too romantic? That's why my girlfriend broke up with me
Q. Hi,am thirty five,an my girlfriend just broke up with me,after six months,I treated her really good, she said the reason for breaking up with me is, am to romantic,am not a challenge, should I just move on,or try to win her back....
A. 22 March 2016: Long gone are the days of treating woman like a glass vestal. Not to say that chivalry and romance is dead but too much can be smothering. Speaking for myself I like a man with a bit of grunt. For some woman it can be seen as a sign of weakness and ... (read in full...)
My wife refuses to accept my wish to be a woman.
Q. I would like to know why, my wife cannot understand that I want to be a woman. She see's me every day for the past 2 years dressed as a woman, she knows I pluck my eyebrows and have my ears pierced, she has even caught me more than once being with ...
A. 22 March 2016: Assuming you have been married for longer than the 2 years you have been living as a crossdresser, she married a man and has a husband. I have to ask, is this something she has always been made aware of before marriage or something that has just ... (read in full...)
Disappointed by my boyfriend's love making. He doesn't satisfy me. What are some options to address this?
Q. Hi all, I'm 17 and my boyfriend doesn't please me in bed? he was my first sexual relationship but he had one previously. I've taken in on all the things that turn him on and make sure I do them, I'm not keen on blowjobs though because I gag real...
A. 20 March 2016: If he is your first and you his second partner you guys are equally in a position for it to be expected that things are still in the early stages of learning, experimenting and getting to know each other. At your age it would be horrible to have a ... (read in full...)
Should I confess the details of my secret messages ?
Q. Should I tell my husband all the details of my relationship with an old friend ? My husband has always had a high sex drive and never had a problem with performance. But since he found out about us sharing some very explicit texts, he has ha...
A. 20 March 2016: If he has asked, then he is ready. It is not fair for you to be deciding what he is or isn't able to handle. Are you ready to be transparent and accountable?, because if not wanting to have him repeatedly drag this up in search of answers week or ... (read in full...)
My roommate caught me with my pants down - literally
Q. I have two roommates. One male and the other female. Im close with both but am closer with my roommate who is a girl as we hangout more. We are strictly friends though as I assume she has no romantic feelings for me. I don't have feelings for her ...
A. 20 March 2016: Oh my Lord, thanks for your post it really did make me laugh, not your situation but your creative writing. bit late now but she should have knocked before barging in anyway so she needs to take the responsibility for her embarrassment on her self. ... (read in full...)
Where are all the sexy fat women at?
Q. i turned 26 on march 10th. I'm still a virgin yes besides that my dream woman is a woman with a lot of meat on her bones i had always liked that.. i don't like skinny girls.. someday i want a family and marriage i want a fat woman do marry. where ...
A. 19 March 2016: have you looked on dating web sites catering for the more voluptuous type?... (read in full...)
Who should pay more?
Q. My bf and I are living together, and I just got a job. MY Mother was helping with the expenses until now. I will be making 25,000 a year which is 2,083 a month. And my bf makes 40,000 a year. He wants to split all the expenses in half, but I ...
A. 19 March 2016: I see it this way, it is a fairly new relationship therefore I think 50/50 is fair. Sucks because yes he might earn more but if he was not anything else but a flat mate then it would be expected that both of you would share things equally. But I ... (read in full...)
Are we banned from this theatre?
Q. Me and my boyfriend were in the movie theater and i sat on his lap and we made out. However, an employee walked by and he said its okay to do that. But he had told the manager and so when the manager got us, he said we were having sex. We were ...
A. 19 March 2016: Probably not, but why would you want to go back there? Im sure there are others with enough chairs so you don't have to sit on your bf lap again :)... (read in full...)
My ex contacted me months later to make amends
Q. I would like to get some advice on if I made the right decisions regarding my ex boyfriend. I am 22, he is 25. We were together 3 years and were friends for about 1 year before. All together I knew him for about 4 years, which is quite a long tim...
A. 19 March 2016: All he want is for you to soothe his guilt. What better way than have you do that by remaining friends and show to his friends that he ain't the bad guy he so desperately feels he needs to prove. Newsflash...dickkhead you are. I say more power to ... (read in full...)
Was I wrong to offer something from my Mom’s estate to my brother’s ex-wife?
Q. Help someone, Thanks you to all who help here. My mom died.three years ago.My sister and I went.through boxes of things that belonged to mom....I have some China which will help me to remember my mom. My brother and his wife split a decade ago....
A. 16 March 2016: In your heart of hearts, what do you think mum would have liked? If the china had significance to those that complain, I figure it would have been out of the box and on display some time ago. ... (read in full...)
Does Online Dating work for men?
Q. So I have been trying to make sense of this... Does online dating really work for men? I ask this because I put up my profile on 2 sites (one famous paid site and one famous free site) and I'm very disappointed with the results. I have a decent ...
A. 15 March 2016: I met my fella on a dating site so if worked for him, years later he might not think that now lol. Depends I guess on what you say when you message. What may sound sweet to you, may come off as something different to someone else. Both men and woman ... (read in full...)
I need a birthday gift for him! Help!!
Q. Ive been dating this guy for a couple months, hes a senior in highschool and his birthday is coming up, i have no clue what to get him, hes not really into sports or cars he loves adventures and i need help! Any ideas? Its hard to know this early ...
A. 15 March 2016: Make him a cake! Cheap,simple and personal... (read in full...)
He's not hit me. But could the other things he does be called abuse? what should I do?
Q. To be blunt and simple, when my year long boyfriend and i argue, he pushes me around. He'll grab me and squeeze my face, throw me down, he'll push me in front of almost anyone.. All throughout the year, he's never hit me though. He will punch...
A. 14 March 2016: He bit you!!!! Enough said... (read in full...)
After cheating on me 3 weeks ago, why is my Bf not doing everything to regain my trust?
Q. My boyfriend has cheated on me recently(three weeks ago). I ask him to delete the woman on social media, block her number etc. He did. However, she still pops up in different messengers and such. when i ask to for the passwords to his accounts he ...
A. 14 March 2016: Because he probably thinks he hasn't done much wrong, doesn't really care and more than likely is intending to do it again. Sounds harsh but from my experience any one serious about redeeming themselves would eat shit to prove just how much they are ... (read in full...)
Am I right to feel offended my friend has been ignoring me?
Q. I am so angry and very hurt with my so called "best friend". We have been friends 30+ years, since grade school. She is an intensely private person who hates phone calls, she NEVER calls, when she can be bothered to get back to me she texts. S...
A. 13 March 2016: Tone down the agro lady. You post, you get advice. My suggestion was with good intention,more for you saving grace not hers. Do as you please... (read in full...)
What support and advice can I give to my friend who has been trying to break up with her married lover? He does not want to let her go.
Q. so my best friend is involved with this married man. she is very naive and had just spent the last 3 years healing from a very bad emotional abusive relationship. she joined the military as an officer and at her first duty station, she was paired w...
A. 13 March 2016: She knows he's no good, that feeling of sadness in her heart tells her that. You sound like a good friend, with good intentions but like the horse is to water-you can lead it there but you cant make it drink. Maybe,instead of trying to point out to ... (read in full...)
Am I right to feel offended my friend has been ignoring me?
Q. I am so angry and very hurt with my so called "best friend". We have been friends 30+ years, since grade school. She is an intensely private person who hates phone calls, she NEVER calls, when she can be bothered to get back to me she texts. S...
A. 13 March 2016: Maybe it is time for you to accept that this is the way she is and instead of you constantly trying to keep the friendship alive bow out now with a nice heartfelt hand written letter explaining why. Good luck... (read in full...)
My boyfriend and my mom hate each other!! Are my Mom's expectations reasonable?
Q. I have a big big issue. My mom and boyfriend don't like each other at all. My mom thinks my bf is rude and doesn’t like her, and he thinks she's annoying, and rude. Yes it is true that my mom can be very annoying, at times but there isn’t real...
A. 13 March 2016: Time for mum to cut the apron strings. How utterly ridiculous to expect that she should be included in such things . This is your relationship to do whatever , when ever and with whom ever, not hers. Personally, I'd be sitting them both down and ... (read in full...)
What support and advice can I give to my friend who has been trying to break up with her married lover? He does not want to let her go.
Q. so my best friend is involved with this married man. she is very naive and had just spent the last 3 years healing from a very bad emotional abusive relationship. she joined the military as an officer and at her first duty station, she was paired w...
A. 13 March 2016: Now that his wife knows about the affair and, as you put it, he has had no consequences, I feel as though this just empowers him to continue to emotional manipulate your friend. Given the repetitive nature of things I would be advising my friend to ... (read in full...)
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