New here? Register in under one minute   Already a member? Login244977 questions, 1084359 answers  

  DearCupid.ORG relationship advice
  Got a relationship, dating, love or sex question? Ask for help!Search
 New Questions Answers . Most Discussed Viewed . Unanswered . Followups . Forums . Top agony aunts . About Us .  Articles  . Sitemap

My husband left me after 20 years of marriage saying he needs to be by himself

Tagged as: Breaking up<< Previous question   Next question >>
Question - (22 March 2016) 5 Answers - (Newest, 22 March 2016)
A female Australia age 51-59, anonymous writes:

Am I a fool

He has left me after 20 years of marriage

He know he has been treating the family badly

He said he still love will look after us

I will never be alone

But need to be by him self

Every one is in shock

He away told every one how much he loves me

I thing he has depression which he agrees but no getting help

He told me he need me not to wait he doesn't know how long it will take

What do I do

<-- Rate this Question

Reply to this Question


Share

Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question!

A female reader, aunt honesty Ireland +, writes (22 March 2016):

aunt honesty agony auntI feel sorry for you and your family. Try and not take it personally, if he has depression, he may feel he has no choice but to be on his own at the moment. As long as you are secure enough to think that he would not harm himself then I think the best thing that you and your family can do is to listen to his request and give him space. Whatever is causing his depression he might need some time to work it out in his head. Off course it is difficult for you as a family to hear, but hopefully he will eventually find what he is looking for.

<-- Rate this answer

A male reader, Serpico United States +, writes (22 March 2016):

Generally people do not do something of this magnitude without a well thought out exit strategy.

My guess is he is looking elsewhere.

<-- Rate this answer

...............................   

A reader, anonymous, writes (22 March 2016):

Is he having an affair?

His behaviour is extremely odd...

<-- Rate this answer

...............................   

A female reader, Ivyblue Australia +, writes (22 March 2016):

Ivyblue agony auntIm sorry, that must be tough for you and your family. I guess it would be confusing to hear the words " I still love you, but can't be with you" in the same sentence. What make you think he has depression and that is the cause? Could it be a build up of things that you have not recognised until now? Things that have the potential to turn around if worked on. I believe that it is possible for someone to be by them self if that is what they need in order to sort them selves out but at the same time to just up and leave without a better explanation is not fair either. You cant force someone to stay so giving him space granted you get some answers might just be the thing you need to do at this point.

<-- Rate this answer

...............................   

A female reader, wrathykins United Kingdom +, writes (22 March 2016):

wrathykins agony auntIf he agrees he has depression but doesn't get help, does he expect it to magically go away?

Depression is a horrible illness that takes sometimes years to get rid of, in some cases not at all, you can only control the symptoms.

If he won't take your advice to go and get help, maybe a family member can talk some sense into him?

Give him space. He says he still loves you. If depression is the reason why he's left, support him in anyway you can when he comes back. But he really needs to get help

<-- Rate this answer

...............................   

Add your answer to the question "My husband left me after 20 years of marriage saying he needs to be by himself"

Already have an account? Login first
Don't have an account? Register in under one minute and get your own agony aunt column - recommended!

All Content Copyright (C) DearCupid.ORG 2004-2008 - we actively monitor for copyright theft

0.0312475000027916!