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Latest articles:

The Cheater's Badge

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27 April 2016: Can you ever forgive me? Will you ever believe me? I swear it, I love you. It was not you, it really is me-my fault. How could I ever tell you about it all? I love you because you remind about the best I have within myself. I can laugh with you. You ...

The Art of Arguing. What helps you to resolve issues in your relationship?

This question has 3 answers by readers of DearCupid.ORG.
Newest answer was posted

28 May 2015: There's a song by Ne-Yo that absolutely cracks me up now whenever I hear it. "When You're Mad" talks about how sexy it is when your partner gets angry and more than implies the joys and benefits of make-up sex! Deep within my nature, I do hav...

Jack and Jill Are Crushing

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28 August 2011: Jack thought Jill was hot. She wore short, jean skirts with leggings underneath. She had nice legs. Her shirts were always nicely filled and her lips looked very...lush. She was smart too. Really cool. Jill though Jack was cute. He was funny, h...

Nice Guys

This question has 22 answers by readers of DearCupid.ORG.
Newest answer was posted

28 June 2011: Nice guys- a lot of us have overlooked them, rejected them, or simply ignored them. Then, we become interested and they're married. So, it's like a chick flick scene where a pretty girl tells her nice guy admirer that he's too much like a brother ...


This question has 8 answers by readers of DearCupid.ORG.
Newest answer was posted

7 November 2010: Every time I see a sex question posted by a young girl 13-15, I cringe and tell myself, "Don't you dare read this." Myself stubbornly refuses to listen, blows me a raspberry, and reads on - hell is sometimes unleashed. The questions which affect me ...

A Glimpse into Love

This question has 10 answers by readers of DearCupid.ORG.
Newest answer was posted

10 October 2010: I'm the kind of girl who goes around barefoot, fights pessimism daily, and has thoughts wild enough to graze with antelope. I've heard love on the radio- songs that sigh heartbreak or gush with joy at finding someone who truly grasped their he...

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I'm flying 1/2 way across the world to see me girlfriend who is probably going to break up with me?

Q.   For the past few months, I've been in a long distance relationship with my girlfriend of 6 years. The long distance is supposed to last another 5 months. I'm planning to visit her next week for a few days on my way to a conference, and then again ...

A.   27 November 2018: Seriously? She phoned you to say that she’s probably going to break up with after you’ve spent time and money to see her? What a mind trip! And what a horrid way to treat someone! Good riddance to her then. I wouldn’t waste my time. Salvage the trip ... (read in full...)

The lack of affection, is it a lack of love or due to upbringing? shall I move on?

Q.   Greetings everyone. I have been with my partner for 4 years. We recently got married. Over all I was happy with the way things were and I grew very accepting of the fact that my partner is just not as affectionate as I am or at least that he do...

A.   26 November 2018: I think counseling could possibly help. This is so sad. You’re a flower that needs to be watered with sprinkles of affection and encouragement and he’s the stingy cloud that cannot/ does not provide. I am concerned that after you cried so intensely ... (read in full...)

We've been together for 5 years and my partner just gets lazier and lazier

Q.   Hi I’m in a relationship have been for 5 years now but my partner is getting lazier and lazier by the day he goes to work which is a very easy job I get up on a morning get our 2 kids up get them ready for school do breakfast get myself ready and ...

A.   26 November 2018: Whew! Have you talked to him about an equal share of responsibilities ? For example, putting together a list where both partners agree on which chores they are responsible for and when these should be done. Sometimes one partner assumes that just ... (read in full...)

We've been together for 5 years and my partner just gets lazier and lazier

Q.   Hi I’m in a relationship have been for 5 years now but my partner is getting lazier and lazier by the day he goes to work which is a very easy job I get up on a morning get our 2 kids up get them ready for school do breakfast get myself ready and ...

A.   26 November 2018: Whew! Have you talked to him about an equal share of responsibilities ? For example, putting together a list where both partners agree on which chores they are responsible for and when these should be done. Sometimes one partner assumes that just ... (read in full...)

She broke up with me because I lied about my drinking. I want to get her back!

Q.   I got a tough deal.. So my girlfriend just broke up with me, beacause ive continuously lied to her about my drinking. Which is a problem. I don’t blame her for breaking up with me at all, but of coarse i didnt want that. okay the thing is we ...

A.   18 November 2018: Totally agree with N91 and CodeWarrior. There’s really nothing more for you to do than get the help you need and learn from this. Addiction (on its way to destroying you) will destroy your career, your goals and any healthy relationships you try and ... (read in full...)

We are both married but we love each other

Q.   Help me. I'm in love with a man who is not my husband. I'm very confused and even though I love my husband and he is a good man I can't stop thinking of someone else. We talk a lot and we have met up personally. We are work colleagues. I think he ...

A.   26 December 2017: 80/20 rule. I heard of this recently where in a good relationship, we get about 80% of our needs met but we lose our minds over someone who can offer that last 20 or so because that “20” tends to be things like: sex appeal, excitement, adventure and ... (read in full...)

I'm pressured to get married how can I cope?

Q.   Is it too late to have kids in your 40"s . I am 31 and single and not dating - I have chased men for the last decade and have only LAnded on abusive men. I don't know why family puts pressure on me to get married and do things by the book but they ...

A.   9 October 2017: I know it's easier said than done but take a deep breath and keep working on yourself. 31 is not too old at all! Enjoy your life as it comes and pay no mind to bitter people who really no business pressuring you. And anyway, are you just a breeding ... (read in full...)

He found the girl he dumped me for was too costly and wants me to take him back.

Q.   So, this guy and I were dating for almost two years and he proposed to me in May. A few weeks later he tells me hes going on vacation with his old crush/ friend since high school there both 28. But they have been friends forever. So, he breaks off ...

A.   9 October 2017: You know, he did you a huge favor, thank him for showing you what a horrible husband he would have been and clearing the path for you to find the amazing man you do deserve. Be firm. Tell him that you no longer wish to have any contact with him... (read in full...)

Long distance boyfriend is asking for naked pictures, should I trust him?

Q.   Hi there friends...I really need your advice.. I have a long distance relationship and know for a year.we don't meet yet and we both christian born again... and I dont want this guy to entertain but he was keep in contact with me even if j don't....

A.   28 September 2017: A born again Christian asking for naked pictures? Interesting. Something is off here and I don't like it. Honey, I don't need to tell you how unsafe it is to send naked pictures. They can end up in terrible porn sites and be used for blackmail etc.... (read in full...)

Fiances mother is refusing to come to our wedding unless we change our plans

Q.   firstly, thank you for taking the time to read my post. I'm having problems with my fiancées mother. Backstory: me and him met in school, at15, we've been together ever since. We got engaged may 2016 in Fiji we had originally planned a two wee...

A.   28 September 2017: I am so sorry to hear that you're stressing out during what should be one of the most exciting times in you life. But in all honestly, your soon-to-be mother in law is being unreasonable. To say such things at your own dress fitting... I think... (read in full...)

Unsure how to proceed I've fallen in love with my 2nd cousin

Q.   So long story short, I'm in love with my second cousin. I went to Lebanon earlier this year, and met this girl there. From first sight we both looked at each other and thought "wow". We got along like a house on fire, it really was scary how we...

A.   28 September 2017: I am glad to hear you are thinking this through! I've grown up hearing "age is just a number" and my own parents had a 14 year age difference so when I met my first serious bf, I thought things would be just fine. Not. It was difficult and he kept ... (read in full...)

I know I could have an amazing life with mistress but don't want to hurt my wife and children

Q.   Hi. I am really confused and need advice. Here goes with a bit of background and my position. I am an almost 49 year old man and have been married for almost 25 years.we have 3 of which has now left home. My wife gave up work 17 years ag...

A.   27 September 2017: I hear the frustration in your words and it seems as though you're feeling a great sense of alienation and dissatisfaction. An affair did not solve these problems but seemed to have given you a lot of what you needed at the time. Hon, I know I d... (read in full...)

Can smells and tastes affect a perfect blissful courtship?

Q.   Im blessed with a beautiful and very loving, caring partner who im sure would do anything for me and I would for her as well. So when I have this seemingly silly problem, I do not know how to overcome. Her odors. She uses deo but it wears off either ...

A.   27 September 2017: She sounds wonderful! And I am glad you are not giving up on her because of these things. We are all have our distinctive odors and as such and here's one piece of advice: DO NOT encourage her to douche at all. Those unnatural chemicals in such ... (read in full...)

He was still receiving photos from his ex!

Q.   So I found out that my boyfriend of 9 months still received pictures from his ex. He knew that it bothers me everytime she send texts, call or send selfie pictures. However, I do understand that my bf has no control of what his ex is sending him. ...

A.   22 September 2017: "My bf has no control of what his ex is sending him" soooo his phone can't block a number from contacting him? He has no absolutely no way of telling NOT to send her pictures to his phone? Interesting. I have male friends and I have female friends, ... (read in full...)

She's going into an arranged marriage, unhappy with the man. Please help!

Q.   I am an Indian. In our culture arrange marriage system is prevalent. Recently my best friend got engaged to someone. Her parents found that guy for her. Its been an year but not a day passed when she didn't complain about him. She always tells me ...

A.   22 September 2017: So sorry! Misread your details...... (read in full...)

She's going into an arranged marriage, unhappy with the man. Please help!

Q.   I am an Indian. In our culture arrange marriage system is prevalent. Recently my best friend got engaged to someone. Her parents found that guy for her. Its been an year but not a day passed when she didn't complain about him. She always tells me ...

A.   21 September 2017: It's wonderful that you care so much and put so much value on your friend's happiness. I will first say that I wish with all my heart that relationship counseling was mandatory before marriage for everyone. Why? Because we as human beings, ... (read in full...)

Do I tell potential dates from the start that I have acne on my butt and thighs?

Q.   I just got out of a 11 year relationship. I have body acne bad like on my butt and inner thighs. I feel no one will ever be with me because of the acne down there....would you be with someone who had acne there? Do I tell people about ...

A.   30 August 2017: "Hi, my name's Joe, I like working out, making my lady feel special and love animals. I also have terrible gas after eating pizza. I mean truly just knock you out, gas-mask bad gas. My left testicle is higher than my right and I have yellow ... (read in full...)

My boyfriend says my friends took advantage of me.

Q.   Hello Everyone! Just wanted some insight on this situation. Last night, my boyfriend and I had friends over (my friend and his girlfriend) to watch the Game of Thrones season finale. I cooked a lot more than my boyfriend thought I should have but ...

A.   30 August 2017: Hello all! Anonymous_123: I don't think he has any trouble with this friend. In fact, he's said a few times that he wishes some of friends were like mine. If he does feel something negative, I guess he simply hasn't told me. HoneyPie: No,... (read in full...)

Is it ever ok for your boyfriend to insinuate that you're fat? Feeling hurt and ashamed, how do I react?

Q.   Hey guys :-) I was just hoping for some advice. I've been with my boyfriend for 7 years and I think of myself as a really good girlfriend to him. When we first got together we were both in very good shape. However over the years we've both put w...

A.   28 August 2017: Hi There, Your feelings are perfectly normal. I come from a culture where people tend to be very blunt and a cousin of mine commented that I was "going to rip through" the dress I was wearing. I went home and looked at myself, realizing that my ... (read in full...)

He finally admitted he didn't have an ex-girlfriend, he has and ex-BOYfriend!

Q.   When we first started going out, my boyfriend told me that he had an ex-girlfriend and that they broke up because she was horrible to him. I believed him and chalked up his refusal of talk about his past relationship to it being too painful. We have ...

A.   28 August 2017: This is a tough situation. I don't think any of us like hearing about the exes of a significant other and this situation is no different. I was concerned that he lied to you initially about this relationship but then, looking at this from the ... (read in full...)

I don't think I can give my girlfriend the best sex

Q.   So my girlfriend are I started dating two months ago but before that we were pretty close friends. We told eachother a decent amount about our sex lives. Now that we are together I feel like I won't be able to give her everything she wants. I want ...

A.   23 August 2017: Don't worry about it. Relationships are give and take and if you're not comfortable with something, you don't have to go for it. My ex mentioned to me that he likes thongs, I consider them "butt floss" and absolutely hate them but he wasn't phased. ... (read in full...)

I'm grateful for the advice, but I feel I will be single forever. How do I come to terms with this?

Q.   First off, I'd like to say thank you to everyone who has advised me so far on this forum. I've gotten some great responses from some of you (WiseOwlE, BrownWolf, thanks for being so active in my posts and listening to me complain as much as I did). ...

A.   23 August 2017: Well, if you really want to focus on being single, watch out that's one way of getting a girlfriend! I was SO sure I was going to remain single and not two months after this pledge, in drops my boyfriend from the sky. He admitted later that me not ... (read in full...)

Guests are constantly criticizing my home, is this a new trend?

Q.   I have realised that one of the things that drives me crazy is people who come into my home and criticise it saying things like: 'This isnt a home..this is a house!" And always telling me how great their place will be or my place would be if they...

A.   23 August 2017: *Sigh. Yes, I have the same issue. My boyfriend and I moved into a nice (albeit older) apartment and we like it. I'm not big on knick-knacks etc so our walls only have pictures of his sea-diving and our furniture is basic. Our our friends came over ... (read in full...)

I don't want to marry a man that doesn't understand when he is being hurtful

Q.   My relationship is a jumbled mess, and I don't know if I should stand by any longer or make a break for it. We both treated each other badly for a long time, but to be fair, neither of us had standards back when this all started. 10 years ago, ...

A.   23 August 2017: I would like to bring two things to your attention: "He threatens me with sexual acts I don't like" and "He doesn't understand when he's being hurtful." Honey, these are signs of abuse bordering on sexual assault if these sex acts are forced on you ... (read in full...)

A guy I have a crush on wants to do things I've never done

Q.   Hi, Im 15 years old, and there is this guy who I like and he likes me back. He says that he wants to finger me and do stuff with me, and I want to as well but I am shit scared. There are so many things that Im worried about, and questions I want a...

A.   18 August 2017: First and foremost, I applaud you for questioning and thinking about these "things." Now, I have a few questions for you: How well do you know this boy? Have you gone on outings? Has he asked you to be his girlfriend? Do you go to the same school? ... (read in full...)

My girlfriend wants to wait but I'm frustrated

Q.   My girlfriend doesn't want to have sex until she is married. She is a virgin. I am frustrated telling her how important sex is in relationship and how deeply emotionally we can be connected. She even used to give her ex bf liberty to have sex with...

A.   24 June 2017: Marry her or leave her. Sex may be important in a relationship but it's more important that two people accept each other's boundaries and respect them. If you can't do that, let her find someone who will and you can date someone who shares your ... (read in full...)

He's going to prison for 10 years and I don't want to wait for him. Is that wrong?

Q.   This is a really unique situation, I'm sure. So my fiance is going to be in prison for the next ten years. I've been with him 3 years. Is it bad for me to not want to wait for him?..I'm only in my mid 20s, and I don't want to put the rest of my ...

A.   22 April 2017: There have been plenty of romantic books and movies where the heroine tearfully promises to wait for her beloved as he goes off to war, a long sea voyage or a lengthy trip to "find himself." In your situation, your fiancé committed a crime and has ... (read in full...)

I put a profile on a website and my boyfriend wanted to meet! I'm devastated

Q.   Hi, Really need some advice and help, feel as if my heart is being ripped to spreads. I'm a trucker and met a wonderful gay guy 'T' 6 months ago, his into fantasy and hi viz' etc, I wasn't but went with the flow, trying to please, and get ...

A.   27 October 2016: Sounds like he's not ready to retire the single life yet...It's tough not being able to see the person you love often but hey, at least you had weekends together which is more that a lot of long distance lovers can have! You seem like you genuinely ... (read in full...)

I don't think his behaviour is ok. He told me to 'get over it'. What should I do?

Q.   A few weeks ago after a night out I ended up "making out" with a co worker that I'd liked for ages. He basically said that he'd had feelings for me for a while too and hadn't really felt that way before. We texted for a while afterwards until...

A.   26 October 2016:  He's obviously playing the field and lying around to get what he wants. Now, based on his concern about his "ex" finding out about his little games, I would say that he's probably still involved with her somehow and is afraid of being caught or ... (read in full...)

What would be your summation of what makes a guy so sexy? Is that impossible to define? Or could you say it is just a feeling you get inside?

Q.   Is there such a thing as a guy who you've just met or seen, who doesn't look like some kind of a model, and who makes you feel, "This guy is SEX! (gaaah, droool)...? What would be your description of what makes him so sexy, or is it impossible to...

A.   26 October 2016: Haha it's different for everybody! I remember having this "Gah! This man is SEX" moment when I met my current boyfriend. My friends don't find "hot" or "handsome" but he was hilarious and SO smart. On our first date he flashed those green eyes at me ... (read in full...)

BF got caught basically cheating, he hasn't reached out?

Q.   My boyfriend and i have been together two years. We have had trust issues because he got a girls number on a trip, and texted her flirting throughout and I found out about it. He said he made a dumb mistake and blah blah blah if I found out about ...

A.   26 October 2016: He hasn't contacted Well, he either has no guts and is shaking in his boots about being confronted by you OR he knows he's done and is respecting your space. Honestly, I am inclined to think he will try something eventually. Maybe he's ... (read in full...)

How Can one forgive BETRAYAL of someone you love, cheating and now the the woman is pregnant?

Q.   I met the man of my dreams, my best friend over a year ago. we live together and his kids come over every other weekend " I Love Them". we went on vacation 5- months ago and I saw a girl kept calling? I asked who is she then my life forever cha...

A.   27 September 2016: I felt so sad reading your past and I am sorry for your loss. The way you described your boyfriend clashes with his actions. Having this affair, getting two women pregnant at the same time, that's scary and tells me that he is not responsible and ... (read in full...)

Should I be feeling so hesitant about agreeing to marriage and to him adopting my son?

Q.   My boyfriend wants me and my son to move away with him, he wants us to get married and he has always said he wants to adopt my son which is everything I want, but I can't help but feel bad that my son's real dad doesn't want anything to do with him ...

A.   11 September 2016: Hm. You're feeling bad about essentially, putting "on paper" what is already a reality. Your fiancé is your son's father. He was there for your son where all true fathers should be. Your son knows this and your fiancé knows this. I have a younger ... (read in full...)

I need help with a fading relationship, please? Can I make him happy again?

Q.   Dear Cupid, I started talking to my current boyfriend early on in the year. We talked all the time and everything was perfect - we made each other happy, nothing ever went wrong and we trusted and understood each other. We started going out...

A.   10 September 2016: Dear Anon, it sounds like the two of you are growing apart...the things you listed like: the cute nickname for another girl, the trust issues and arguments, not being positive about you...he seems like he's already checking while you are still ... (read in full...)

Should 13 year olds date 16 year olds?

Q.   I'm a 13 year old female and I'm dating a 16 year old guy.. I think I'm in love but I don't know if that's wrong. I mean my friends say that we are cute and my parents say that it's wrong because of the age difference. All I wanna know is if it's ...

A.   10 September 2016: Yes, it's wrong. I was in your shoes once with a crush on a seventeen year old and I had just turned fourteen. Three years might not seem like much but: he's in high school, has high school friends, is able to stay out late, is able to work, is able ... (read in full...)

I thought I stonewalled my wife from saving up for breast surgery but she's raised money on a website!

Q.   Angry at wife for finding her on a free breast implant website. How should I make her stop? I've been married to my wife for 10 years and we have two children together. Six months back, she said to me how unsatisfied she's been with how her bre...

A.   12 July 2016: Wow. This is interesting. On the one hand, I understand where you're coming from with the surgery. Implants are not a necessity and honestly, the surgery can be very dangerous-especially for a woman in her 40s/50s. So many things could go wrong. I ... (read in full...)

Grieving for my twin brother who died. My parents don't mention him. How can I get through this grief?

Q.   I lost my twin brother, actually i feel like i lost half my soul. I am never going to be the same person again because half of me has died. Family give reasons and excuses and say everything will work out. We had always been together, never ...

A.   9 July 2016: I am sorry for your loss. Losing someone we love is I think, the hardest factor in life. I don't think your parents want you to forget your twin brother who you were close to-he was also their son. But every one deals with grief differently. When my ... (read in full...)

I love women. But I seem to react differently. do get an erection when a woman sees me naked. Does this mean I might be gay?

Q.   There is something weird about me. As far back as I can remember, I have always been sexually different from normal men. I do not think I am gay. I am not attracted to other men at all. I am attracted to women, but in a different manner from ...

A.   4 July 2016: I don't think you're gay at all. Some people seem to believe that sexuality is black and white and that attraction is as well-not true! People don't speak about it often because we're so conditioned to think in terms of what is "normal" and what is ... (read in full...)

I fell in love with my much older professor. Help!

Q.   Okay I just graduated from a medical school. So I should feel blessed as being able to become a doctor after 5 years of hardships. But it do not turn that way, as I could not forget one of my professor at all. Well he is too old, now he is 70+ . and ...

A.   21 June 2016: I'm sorry you're feeling this way. Being infatuated with someone is more intense than some people like to think! But my dear, you are 25 and he is 70+. Right now, he may seem SO interesting in comparison to the men in your age group and that's okay. ... (read in full...)

I feel betrayed and devastated that my husband is regularly visiting a brothel. What are my options to deal with my hurt?

Q.   after 6 years of marriage I feel everything is falling apart! and I am completely devastated .. My husband is having an adultery, he is a regular brothel visitor. we got married after years of crazy deep love and commitment, now we are married for ...

A.   13 June 2016: I am so sorry you are going through this and no loving mother wants to put their child through a divorce but in this case, I don't think you have another choice. He had lied to you for years and spent money that could have gone towards making you ... (read in full...)

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