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*emmenoir

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I stole from my brother, how do I repair our relationship?

Q.   My youger brother, Justin, is 23 months youger than me. I am 35 years old and he is 33 years old. He have always been a good person (doing charity work, volunteering his time to different charities, est.). When I was in my late teens and early ...

A.   24 June 2018: You will have to EARN Justin's trust all over again and you will have to EARN Justin's respect all over again. How? By being totally honest, sincere and repentant for all the pain and hurt you've caused your brother. Remember, Justin is n... (read in full...)

He blocked me on Instagram then lied about why!

Q.   He blocked me on Instagram and lied to me about it saying his app had a problem. Yes I believed it. I have another account on Instagram for makeup and fashion posts. He commented on another girl’s picture saying “Dayyyuuumm”. He has all his exes and ...

A.   22 June 2018: This man is a serious player, sleaze, womaniser, etc;, etc;. You are wasting your precious time with him and he is definitely using you to some degree and definitely to his OWN ADVANTAGE. His ego is bigger than his head and this isn't good, ce... (read in full...)

I feel resentful toward my girlfriend. Should I keep trying to make it work?

Q.   I met my girlfriend online 7 months ago and we have been living together for the past 4 months. We use to talk on the phone everyday for the first 3 months. She came here from a different country to visit me and hasn't been back to her country ...

A.   22 June 2018: You both moved things to the next level way, way too quickly! This is why she is feeling and behaving as she is and this is why you are at a loss to comprehend. You both had great expectations that most likely haven't been met to the full or ... (read in full...)

All the staring, sexual tension and then ignoring me... What's going on here?

Q.   I met a guy at my university last year. We had instant attraction and started liking each other. Though the school year had ended, he was coming to uni as he was involved in a protest/occupation against the school. He would keep staring at me an...

A.   17 June 2018: You are reading way, way too much into this entire fiasco. This guy was never, ever interested in you for sex and the fact that you would even assume this is quite ridiculous. You are micro managing each and every single word/move this g... (read in full...)

I asked for help and he lied about why he couldn't.

Q.   I am not sure if what I am feeling right now is normal or I am being unjust? I asked for help from my boyfriend of 4 years. what I need is a room/place to stay for 1 year while I am doing the last part of my studies. We do not live together...

A.   15 June 2018: You should let your bf know that you are very aware of what's going on, regarding what his roommate said to you. I would then seriously consider breaking up with him, because after all, 4 years together and a relationship that doesn't appear t... (read in full...)

Me and my dad's friend want to take it to the next level

Q.   Me and my dad's friend have been texting for a while and we've talked about taking things to another level... Im not sure what to do about it, i mean i'm 21 an he's about 30, I have always like older guys and we are into each other but you know he's ...

A.   15 June 2018: This is a seriously "bad" idea!! You are a bit too young for this man and besides, he is your Dad's friend! I am almost certain, that this entire charade will turn very ugly, if you and your Dad's friend get together. You should, above all... (read in full...)

Where is the panty liner, will he think me disgusting if he finds it?

Q.   Before me and this guy had sex I went to use the bathroom and I removed my pantyliner. The pantyliner was clean as I recently put it on but his trash was overflowing so I decided to just wrap it up and put it in my pocket and throw it away when i ...

A.   13 June 2018: Please worry not about this at all. You are a woman, you are simply using a panty liner and this is a very normal, healthy and clean habit by all means. Even if this guy did see it, it's no big deal at all and i am quite sure, he won't think a... (read in full...)

The relationship started off terribly and it’s still rocky, but we really love each other! Do I leave or stay?

Q.   I’m in this relationship with a guy for a year and a half now. The relationship started off terribly because he started ghosting me after a month. We hardly met and he never replied to me. He used to ignore me for most of the time. I made a fake ...

A.   13 June 2018: A man who treats you as this man treats you, DOES NOT LOVE YOU!! UNLESS you are incredibly naive, insecure or totally delusional, this entire story makes no sense to me. Here are the facts. When two people truly love, trust and respect ... (read in full...)

I’ve made an ultimatum for my cheating husband. Is it reasonable?

Q.   Hello Cupids, Short question. My husband, who I have been with for 13 years, compulsively cheats on me. Last time, I kicked him out and begged him to get therapy, which he said he would. He didn’t, but kept telling me he planned to. Things got b...

A.   31 May 2018: I should add, Your husband doesn't RESPECT you, BEcause you NEVER STAND BY WHAT YOU SAY.... (read in full...)

I’ve made an ultimatum for my cheating husband. Is it reasonable?

Q.   Hello Cupids, Short question. My husband, who I have been with for 13 years, compulsively cheats on me. Last time, I kicked him out and begged him to get therapy, which he said he would. He didn’t, but kept telling me he planned to. Things got b...

A.   31 May 2018: Honestly, you are wasting your time even thinking that your husband will ever change. He can't and he won't! It's that simple. He is "addicted", he is a serial cheater, liar and manipulator. He knows how to play his cards very well and he a... (read in full...)

Should I lie and say the baby is his?

Q.   Ive made a mess but now ive got to grow up and sort it out. Me and my 'ex'boyfriend had a break , we didnt say what each other can or cant do and if we were going to get back together. I had a feeling he was seeing someone else but just left him to ...

A.   28 May 2018: I'm sorry sweetheart, but if you reach out writing to "social media" you aren't always going to hear what you want to hear. This is the harsh reality of life and you should be "open" to "constructive criticism". You have fallen pregnant, via a ... (read in full...)

Why am I never a man’s first choice?

Q.   Hi good people, I’m feeling a bit down today and was hoping you might be able to offer me some advice or even just words of comfort. I’m 32 (33 in July) and I’ve been single for 3 years now. My previous long-term relationship was rocky and I’m de...

A.   28 May 2018: In simple terms, you are doing nothing wrong. You simply have yet to meet your Mr Right. How will i be able to know? You may ask. It's within your gut, within your heart. If/when you meet the "right" guy for you, you WILL KNOW and above... (read in full...)

He doesn't seem interested. Should I just move on?

Q.   So, I talked to a guy on plenty of fish for 2 weeks and decided to add him on fb. And now we rarely talk. He will like or heart pics of me but never write me or call me. I always initiate our conversations. Should I just unadd him and move on. I ...

A.   26 May 2018: This guy is either very insecure, very shy or he's simply not interested in you, as you are in him. He may like you, but perhaps not as you like him. I do believe, if he truly liked you "as more" than just a mere friend, he'd be more open to ... (read in full...)

My fiancé is acting different during sex! Is this normal?

Q.   I am 29 and a fitness instructor and fiance he is 32 and is a financial analyst. We have a good sex life just til now. Foreplay he was never that much into it but it would still happen. Lately, foreplay is non-existent. Lately, there has be...

A.   26 May 2018: AND please don't play the "blame game" with your fiance. Just speak in more "general terms" and again, be kind to yourself and to your fiance. The softer your approach, the more "open" your fiance is likely to be. ... (read in full...)

My fiancé is acting different during sex! Is this normal?

Q.   I am 29 and a fitness instructor and fiance he is 32 and is a financial analyst. We have a good sex life just til now. Foreplay he was never that much into it but it would still happen. Lately, foreplay is non-existent. Lately, there has be...

A.   26 May 2018: You DO need to TALK to your fiance for sure. If him biting your lip so hard (that it bled) and him pulling your hair hard has made you feel uncomfortable, to the point of writing in to DC, then you yourself "acknowledge" that something is wrong he... (read in full...)

Help! I’ve fallen for my friend, but I don’t know what to do about it!

Q.   I was hoping if a female mind would be able to help out here because I'm in love with my best friend and I don't know if she feels the same way. I'm 23 and never had a proper relationship before so not terribly experienced! However, met thi...

A.   26 May 2018: I would also like to add, Getting involved with those who are ALREADY INVOLVED, is way too "complex" and "messy". Spare yourself, any "unnecessary" hassle and issues, by NOT getting involved in the first place.... (read in full...)

Help! I’ve fallen for my friend, but I don’t know what to do about it!

Q.   I was hoping if a female mind would be able to help out here because I'm in love with my best friend and I don't know if she feels the same way. I'm 23 and never had a proper relationship before so not terribly experienced! However, met thi...

A.   26 May 2018: In short, you DO NOT try to get involved with a person who's ALREADY involved! You have been this young lady's friend for approx 8 months and if you wish to DESTROY this friendship, then you're going the right way about it. Ask yourself this qu... (read in full...)

I accused my boyfriend of lying and now he won't talk to me

Q.   Ok, so I'm not in a really good place right now and I'm hoping for some help. My bf is a super sweet guy but he can also be emotionally distant and introverted. I don't like this part of him and I feel insecure because of it. I'm trying to f...

A.   25 May 2018: You carry a very "fragile" sense of self and you come across as "super insecure". You ought know the rules. It's NEVER, EVER a good nor smart idea, to get involved with married men or women. Why? Because it will NEVER WORK OUT. IT WON'T... (read in full...)

He’s been giving porn more attention than me!

Q.   Hey. So me and my boyfriend have been going together for 6 yrs now. Our relationship is pretty good for the most part. However the past couple of months he's been giving porn more attention than me. It's made me a bit insecure, and I'm starting...

A.   25 May 2018: I agree with DarrellG. This is exactly what you should do and you should also make YOUR FEELINGS clear to your partner. If you don't tell him how YOU FEEL, he won't know. Also, please remember that "porn" isn't "reality", but "fantasy"... (read in full...)

How do I support my husband in his business stress?

Q.   Hi all Im wondering how i can support my husband in his stress. He runs two businesses that could be successful but due to outside factors, things arent going well. He literally cannot catch a break. He most recently said: "if i have to deal wit...

A.   23 May 2018: One thing i do know, is that when you DEMAND respect, you will RECEIVE it.... (read in full...)

How do I support my husband in his business stress?

Q.   Hi all Im wondering how i can support my husband in his stress. He runs two businesses that could be successful but due to outside factors, things arent going well. He literally cannot catch a break. He most recently said: "if i have to deal wit...

A.   23 May 2018: You both need to talk asap and you need to let your husband know, that no matter what he's going through, you find it very hard to relate to him, when he gets upset or lashes out at you. You know what? THis man is your husband, so he must show ... (read in full...)

I’m a first time dater and find myself stressing about the romantic/ affectionate part of it!

Q.   Does anyone have tips for letting yourself be more romantic/affectionate with someone when it's totally outside of your comfort zone? Been seeing someone for a couple weeks now (first time ever dating) and can tell he wants more from me physical...

A.   22 May 2018: By the way, i should also mention, as you've only known this person for a few weeks, you definitely shouldn't rush into intimacy. You don't know him well enough, nor can you even trust him fully, to be too close to him. Please remember, most y... (read in full...)

I’m a first time dater and find myself stressing about the romantic/ affectionate part of it!

Q.   Does anyone have tips for letting yourself be more romantic/affectionate with someone when it's totally outside of your comfort zone? Been seeing someone for a couple weeks now (first time ever dating) and can tell he wants more from me physical...

A.   22 May 2018: There may be various reasons, but i was thinking, perhaps you're afraid of moving too fast, especially if you're thinking way ahead and thinking that when you are ready to allow this person to enter your personal space, he may try to take things ... (read in full...)

In a long term relationship but now some things are bothering me!

Q.   Hi. I am in a long term relationship (over 4 years) now. I do love my boyfriend very much, however recently a few 'issues' which ordinarily I would just ignore have started eating away at me. The first, I have found myself looking at other guys more ...

A.   21 May 2018: Have a think about the pros vs cons of what you have together and see what weighs in more. Never take risks or chances with others, UNLESS, you can truly see that you've no real future together. Your wandering eye, well it sounds as though... (read in full...)

Why does my married boyfriend love me one day and hate me the next?

Q.   Hi. I have been in a "relationship" with a married man for approximately 5 years. Before I begin, I am asking not to be judged. I truly and honestly go through enough pain because of the situation I put myself in. And I know what everyone here will ...

A.   21 May 2018: May i also add, As you've placed yourself "out there" via this site, you have placed yourself in a position, to receive "constructive criticism". ... (read in full...)

Why does my married boyfriend love me one day and hate me the next?

Q.   Hi. I have been in a "relationship" with a married man for approximately 5 years. Before I begin, I am asking not to be judged. I truly and honestly go through enough pain because of the situation I put myself in. And I know what everyone here will ...

A.   21 May 2018: You don't want to be judged nor criticised, HOWEVER, i am hear to let you know, that regardless of what you say, you WILL be judged and criticised to some extent. Why? Because this entire situation exists, not because of this scumbag, sleazeb... (read in full...)

Does he have a disorder or is he just a liar?

Q.   Hello i have a question, i have been dating this guy for 3 months but am confused about his character.The first time met him, he told he was born Jan 30th, the next time i asked he said 20th feb 1979 i asked to see his Id it was 1th Jan 1978. Last ...

A.   21 May 2018: This guy is a compulsive liar and yes, he does know exactly what he's doing, even though he may not realise the severity of his actions. It doesn't sound as though he respects himself enough to tell the truth, so how can he remotely respect ... (read in full...)

Our sex life is non existent

Q.   Me and my gf sex life is non existent. Sometimes I look forward to it and it can be over so soon. No foreplay happens, she doesn’t let me go anywhere near her for foreplay. She used to be really wild, and now it’s gone to nothing. I’m still up for ...

A.   21 May 2018: Oh and do not play the "blame game". Speak on behalf of "both" of you and be "inclusive" regarding your concerns, rather than being "exclusive" and trying to make your gf feel bad or guilty. Remember, she may not be doing anything with "i... (read in full...)

Our sex life is non existent

Q.   Me and my gf sex life is non existent. Sometimes I look forward to it and it can be over so soon. No foreplay happens, she doesn’t let me go anywhere near her for foreplay. She used to be really wild, and now it’s gone to nothing. I’m still up for ...

A.   21 May 2018: You mention you're 29 & your gf is 24. Your age bracket noted is between "30 to 35". You need to TALK to your gf about this issue and how you feel about it. When you sit down together and discuss your concerns, then i am almost certain, your gf... (read in full...)

He's addicted to sex sites and internet dating. I want my old man back!

Q.   My live in man of 20 yes he is addictied to internet dating and sex sites.his treatment of me in last couple months he says not doing anything but he is I am a worthless I have tried everything just to get him to come bed with me he say ok then ...

A.   21 May 2018: This doesn't sound good at all. Your man is "addicted" to online dating and online porn unfortunately. Addictions can be very hard to overcome, but they can be overcome, if the person with the addiction, really wants to put effort into tryi... (read in full...)

I have a huge crush on the perfect girl but we're both in relationships. Should I still get her number in case we break up with our partners in the future?

Q.   Im in a class with a girl, who when I first saw her thought she was pretty but didnt think much of it. As Ive got to know her a little better over the semester and she is so smart! Probably the most intelligent in the class. She honestly seems so ...

A.   19 May 2018: No, you should not maintain contact ongoingly, with this female classmate. Why? Because you know you want more than mere friendship. You are both within respective relationships and even though you like this girl very much, it isn't fair... (read in full...)

How to change her behaviour and thinking?

Q.   I have been in a relationship for 3 years now and I have the known her very well but sometimes still our thoughts,thinkings are very different and I think she usually takes a situation negatively and I mostly get angry while handling situation and ...

A.   18 May 2018: Your comments come across as a bit 'bizarre". You cannot change anybody's personality and ways of thinking. Your gf is in your own words, "negative and stubborn" and you are mostly "angry" when dealing with a situation. This is what individu... (read in full...)

He hasn’t initiated a date and I’m wondering if I’m being played!

Q.   Hello everyone! So I’ve been on a few dates with this guy, who I really like! He’s a mutual friend, but I don’t know much about him. The first date was good, we had plenty to talk about but we were trying to impress each other quite a lot b...

A.   18 May 2018: Forgive me, however, you are coming across as a bit "paranoid" and "desperate". Desperate to hear from this guy and a guy you've only dated twice! It sounds as though you are now living much of your daily life, revolving around HIS and this is ... (read in full...)

Should I keep in touch and message him from time to time? Or leave it to him? And how long are we on hold for?

Q.   i met someone in february at a friends party and we hit it off immediately, only he suffers from mental health issues because of a past abusive relationship anyway recently my mum had a go at him through Facebook for going to see his friend instead ...

A.   18 May 2018: I hear that you really like this guy, however, he is dealing with a mental health issue and really, he should be taking care of "himself" before he can engage in a healthy/stable relationship with "you". I am not being discriminatory here, bu... (read in full...)

Why does my husband look up his ex after we argue?

Q.   Anytime I have a really big argument with my husband, the next day or day after I check his internet history. I did this once years ago as I felt paranoid after the fight. I really really hate arguing, it freaks me out. So the first time I did it, I ...

A.   18 May 2018: Only your husband knows the full truth/reason behind his connecting with his ex's, however, i would be more concerned, as to why you both have to argue the way you do. You shouldn't have to argue all the time and certainly not do things that wil... (read in full...)

I don't think this party girl is girlfriend material. Should I break up?

Q.   I'm 32 years old my girlfriend is22. We're dating for four months and I still have doubts about her if she is gf material to me. Bottom line is she's a party girl, to me a girl who likes to party and drink and have sex with a lot of dudes is not ...

A.   18 May 2018: I haven't got a huge amount to say here, bec it's all been covered wonderfully by other readers. You are really NO DIFFERENT to your younger gf. The age difference, i personally think/feel is the real issue here, bec you're both at differen... (read in full...)

Any advice on dealing with my strange boss?

Q.   I have recently started a new job that I really enjoy and my new boss is very strange. One minute he is full on saying the coffees on him as I done a great job ...then leaves before the pre arranged meeting time so we have no coffee and no ...

A.   18 May 2018: Just give yourself more time, to get to find out more about your boss's personality, as you've admitted you do like your job. You wouldn't want to make any hasty/ill informed decisions, to only find out later, that your boss was actually a well m... (read in full...)

Boyfriend ignores me for computer games, should I be upset?

Q.   Hi, I feel like this is a bit of a strange question and I'm not sure if I am allowed to feel this way or not. Hopefully you can shed some light for me. I've been with my boyfriend for 10 years and recently moved in together 3 years ago. I fe...

A.   18 May 2018: If he really and truly wishes for your relationship to survive the long haul, then he is going to have to make a change here. He is with YOU, he is not SINGLE and if he wants to play games day and night, night and day, then he shouldn't be in a ... (read in full...)

Two people in as little as a week have brought me to a choice, and it's tearing me apart.

Q.   For someone bisexual who hasn't had any experience in dating or relationships, I've suddenly been forced with a choice. A woman at work has taken interest in me, and we talk every now and then. Surprisingly, she asked me out on a date. She's nice ...

A.   17 May 2018: I agree with "Youcannotbeserious". You don't need to rush at all, nor make any hasty decisions that you may later regret. You definitely need to meet this guy in person first, so you can really assess your physical connection, before coming to... (read in full...)

Did my boyfriend snub my son by not saying goodbye to him?

Q.   Something is bugging me. I drove my boyfriend to work today. His car is in the shop and he doesn't live with me. My 13 year-old son was in the car too. After I dropped off my boyfriend, I was going to drop my son off at school. Well, my boyfr...

A.   17 May 2018: UNLESS you know something "negative" about your bf and your son's relationship, then i would say, try not to worry too much, about your bf not saying a specific goodbye to your son. I know it may seem rude to you, because you're his Mother, ... (read in full...)

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