Trying to save my marriage. Husband calls me names for having had sexual partners before we met. Help!
Q. I have been married to my husband for 7 years and we have been together for 14. We have 4 children together. Recently, he has told me that he wants to leave me because I had sex with multiple people (a total of 6, including 2 one night stands) ...
A. 22 November 2013: what youwish said exactly. Spot on.... (read in full...)
Trying to save my marriage. Husband calls me names for having had sexual partners before we met. Help!
Q. I have been married to my husband for 7 years and we have been together for 14. We have 4 children together. Recently, he has told me that he wants to leave me because I had sex with multiple people (a total of 6, including 2 one night stands) ...
A. 22 November 2013: Hi there.
First of all, I see that you live in the United States. Sexual activity before marriage is not a big deal here. You’re in fact the minority if you wait til marriage. Most men and women have had at least double the amount of sexual p... (read in full...)
Is this gay guy seriously blowing hot and cold, or was I off?
Q. So I met this guy, we hooked up, he refused to kiss because he said he was in love with his best friend in another country, who was also in a relationship. He said he wouldn’t kiss because he felt like he was betraying his best friend (!!!!). Alarm ...
A. 22 November 2013: You read it to mean he's extremely shady and walk away. It was a one-time hook up and that was it.
I highly doubt he's got a best friend who he likes in another country. More like he probably has a boyfriend in another country who would wonder w... (read in full...)
Did I overreact to comments about my weight?
Q. I think I might have over reacted. I was texting back and forwards with this guy I had not dated yet. Everything was going well until he made this comment ~i don't usually date girls like you, but you look decent~ when i asked him what did he mean ...
A. 22 November 2013: You think his comment was *slightly* inappropriate? His comment was way off base. I wonder where people come off making such stupid comments. I would have been extremely put off by this guy. And then the comments he made to you about you needing to ... (read in full...)
Does my B/f still miss his ex? How often do they talk? Was their relationship better than ours? Am I a rebound to him?
Q. Dear cupid, I have been with my boyfriend for 3 months and we were friends/talking for 2 months before we got together. When him and I first met and were in the friends/talking kind of stage, he still had feelings for his ex and they talked ofte...
A. 22 November 2013: Does he still miss her? There’s really no telling for sure about that. I know for me, I’ve remained friends with a lot of my exes. Many people disagree with this as they say it can cause problems in relationships. But I legitimately am only friends ... (read in full...)
Is there still a chance for us? Should I contact him again within a few months? Or should I just forget about him?
Q. I'll keep it short since our 'relationship' was short too. I met this guy at a party 3 weeks ago. We had an instant click and an amazing evening. He told me he came just out of a long relationship and was single for just 1 month. He's 23, i'm 26 ...
A. 21 November 2013: he got sex and THEN pulled away. i'm sure you're an awesome girl. you don't deserve that. he was on the rebound and used you. i would not contact him again. ... (read in full...)
My instincts tell me he's not one for a FWB
Q. Dear Aunts and Uncles I have recently started what is supposed to be a "friends with benefits" relationship with a guy who's almost 20 years older than me. He's an incredibly attractive man and we've liked each other for a few weeks and we fin...
A. 21 November 2013: How long was he married for? He's probably so used to what marriage is like that he's unable to separate sex from emotions. Or he may be looking to replace his wife with you because of being lonely. Which is irrational. But people do that all the ... (read in full...)
Things have changed so much because of her illness -- can we get back to where we were?
Q. I need advice as am completely stuck. I'm in a long term lesbian relationship that for the past year has been incredibly difficult. When I first met my partner she was my ideal woman. Literally the moment I met her I fancied her. She was li...
A. 21 November 2013: I have been through what you're going through. First off, let me say props to you for sticking around. it's incredibly difficult and you must love her very much.
My gf suffered depression as well as other things on top of it. Some days were ama... (read in full...)
Came home unexpectedly and found husband in strange situation. Is he gay?
Q. Dear everyone, Hi I have been married to my husband since May 11th 2013. We havebeen together for almost 8 years. He has never shown any signs of being bi sexual or gay. Well the other morning he didn't expect me home for awhile but my daughter...
A. 21 November 2013: He called him right before he "unexpectedly" barged in unannounced? That's not possible.band as previously mentioned, just walking into the house of a person who has a family is extremely intrusive. It wouldn't happen. Why would this random man just ... (read in full...)
My boyfriend wouldn't be sending flowers to his ex girlfriend every year on that date, would he?
Q. I saw that my boyfriend has been forwarding himself an email about a reminder notice to send flowers the last couple of days . I had seen it quickly over his shoulder and then took a peek yesterday which I don't normally do! The flowers were ...
A. 20 November 2013: As another mentioned - it could also just be something he registered for years ago that they still have him in the data base and send a reminder. ... (read in full...)
My boyfriend wouldn't be sending flowers to his ex girlfriend every year on that date, would he?
Q. I saw that my boyfriend has been forwarding himself an email about a reminder notice to send flowers the last couple of days . I had seen it quickly over his shoulder and then took a peek yesterday which I don't normally do! The flowers were ...
A. 20 November 2013: Anniversary of someone passing away? Parents anniversary? Friends anniversary?
I highly doubt it's to an ex. I suppose anything is possible, but it wouldn't be my first thought. ... (read in full...)
Help with insecure GF who wants a break
Q. My GF has really low self esteem and she's really anxious and insecure. She does not love herself and she has had a hard life. She was almost raped and she had to have an abortion amongst other things. She didn't want to get into a relationship but ...
A. 20 November 2013: yeah, i agree with so very confused. she's just playing mind games with you now. ignore her.... (read in full...)
Came home unexpectedly and found husband in strange situation. Is he gay?
Q. Dear everyone, Hi I have been married to my husband since May 11th 2013. We havebeen together for almost 8 years. He has never shown any signs of being bi sexual or gay. Well the other morning he didn't expect me home for awhile but my daughter...
A. 20 November 2013: This definitely sounds suspicious for sure. It does honestly sound like your husband was sneaking this man in when he thought you would be gone. and as another poster mentioned - why was his underwear on the stairs? I'm not sure it's adding up.
... (read in full...)
Went through boyfriends phone and found messages to other girls. Is this cheating?
Q. My bf and I have been going out for almost 7 months now. I've never gone through his stuff before but he left his phone behind today and I got curious. I honestly wasn't expecting anything, maybe just a couple messges from his girl-friends. Wha...
A. 20 November 2013: Is tinder a dating site?... (read in full...)
Came home unexpectedly and found husband in strange situation. Is he gay?
Q. Dear everyone, Hi I have been married to my husband since May 11th 2013. We havebeen together for almost 8 years. He has never shown any signs of being bi sexual or gay. Well the other morning he didn't expect me home for awhile but my daughter...
A. 20 November 2013: That is a bit odd! Does he knew the neighbor well enough that he would just come barging in like that and catch him with his pants off? And is the neighbor a good friend? Or just acquaintance? Reason I ask is would it he weird for him to come over ... (read in full...)
Went through boyfriends phone and found messages to other girls. Is this cheating?
Q. My bf and I have been going out for almost 7 months now. I've never gone through his stuff before but he left his phone behind today and I got curious. I honestly wasn't expecting anything, maybe just a couple messges from his girl-friends. Wha...
A. 20 November 2013: I'm not certain what tinder is. However, if you're certain it was your boyfriend who messaged those girls, it's pretty certainly inappropriate.
Do you know for sure he doesn't know them at all? If they are friends, it would be a complete... (read in full...)
What do I do if I bump into a guy I used to date while at work?
Q. So, I'm going for a job interview in a couple of days. Nothing fancy, just an office job at a university near to where I was a student. I still have friends there, so thought it would be fun to return. Thing is, there's a guy that goes to the uni ...
A. 19 November 2013: Easier said than done to simply tell you not to panic, I know. If you have a tendency to panic and get flustered over most things then my advice probably won't help to change that lol. But I can help to put some things into perspective that might ... (read in full...)
Is he or is he not interested in me?
Q. Hi all, I have written on here before and I got really good advice from you all. Very good. I have met someone who I've seen around for more than a year now but have only spoken twice before he found me on Facebook and started chatting. He ask...
A. 19 November 2013: he definitely likes you :-) just keep playing it cool to be patient. He's just taking it slow. Which if you ask me is a good thing.... (read in full...)
Lesbian confusion with a girl I'm really into
Q. I met a girl in May this year, we got close, however she had a girlfriend whom shes been with for 3 years (I'm 20 and shes 21). We kissed, nothing more. I went to USA in July till Oct, we fell out whilst I was in USA. I felt sly as she cheated on ...
A. 19 November 2013: I think she sounds a bit shady and I would be very wary. Are you sure she's single? I've had a girl play me like this before. Just kept being elusive until finally I discovered she had a gf for years. Then it all made sense why she was so elusive! ... (read in full...)
Should I trust my boyfriend that he didn't cheat?
Q. Ok so my boyfriend rarely goes out drinking but he was out on Saturday night with his (single) friend. I have trust issues and I can get a bit paranoid and jealous.i did the wrong thing and looked at his mobile phone call history.(we live...
A. 19 November 2013: Has he ever given you reason to be suspicious? If not, then it's nothing. And his reason seems very legit and justified.
You gotta do yourself and him a favor and not go behind his back and check up on him. It's not fair and it's not healthy.... (read in full...)
Looking for help with emotionally unavailable guy.
Q. I don't know if this is a long shot but I'm looking for some advice and help with dealings I have with a guy. He is emotionally unavailable, he is my fwb ( when he fancies it!!) and I'm not sure if you'd call him a player. Anyway so I'm hoping to...
A. 19 November 2013: I disagree. You actually can play the emotions of an emotionally unavailable person. But I still advise not to.
But I've always found playing hard to get is always the best thing to do. Make them wait on you. Don't answer their calls or texts ri... (read in full...)
Help with insecure GF who wants a break
Q. My GF has really low self esteem and she's really anxious and insecure. She does not love herself and she has had a hard life. She was almost raped and she had to have an abortion amongst other things. She didn't want to get into a relationship but ...
A. 19 November 2013: I can relate. My ex had a lot of issues like this. And no matter how much I always tried to be strong for her and tell her she could fix herself while being with me, we couldn't make it work.
She's right - she CAN'T have a fully function... (read in full...)
He said he was single, but now I find out about his terminal girlfriend
Q. I've just found out that this guy I have been getting to know has a girlfriend and that she is terminally ill. I confronted him and he says he just needs someone to support him through this time. I feel sick to my stomach because we have kissed a ...
A. 18 November 2013: Wow yeah he a jerk. I can recognize this is a hard thing for him to deal with. However, that doesn't merit going out and cheating on your gf.
I wouldn't give him the time of day. He's already proven he's a liar. And a cheater. Drop him and move... (read in full...)
What advice would you give to your 20 year old self
Q. What advice would you give to your 20 year old self? Financial, relationship and just general life information you wish you had known. My biggest fear is wasting my life, I think about this daily. I constantly feel like I should be doing/...
A. 17 November 2013: Get better grades in college and stop partying so much. ... (read in full...)
What can a single guy with a high sex drive do?
Q. I really don't like masturbating that much, but because I've got such a high sex drive i have to do it for relief. I can masturbate up to 3/4 times a day, and i get horny very quickly - for example i was sitting at the back of the bus behind a girl ...
A. 17 November 2013: No. She wouldn't have.
Masturbation is the key here. lots of it. ... (read in full...)
I always feel I'm annoying my FWB when I text him
Q. So, it started back in 2010 when I met this boy and we were just friends with benefits.. I started to really like him and he said he didn't want anything more and then he just randomly got a girlfriend with this girl I disliked at the time. So, ...
A. 17 November 2013: He called you pal for a reason. He was reiterating he isn't into you *that * way. If you like him, definitely put some distance between you two because you will wind up hurt in this circumstance. Find a man who wants to be with you.... (read in full...)
Is he or is he not interested in me?
Q. Hi all, I have written on here before and I got really good advice from you all. Very good. I have met someone who I've seen around for more than a year now but have only spoken twice before he found me on Facebook and started chatting. He ask...
A. 16 November 2013: it sounds like he's got to be interested. maybe he's just trying to play it cool and not seem too needy and overbearing. some men have learned this over time. they know that coming across too needy is a sure way to push a woman away. and then they ... (read in full...)
Should I be more laid back no matter how immature his friends are?
Q. I have been with my boyfriend for over a year. He is the sweetest guy and puts me first in his life in so many ways. I know he is the one for me. The only problem is We are 29 years old. Most of my friends have moved on in significant ways--married, ...
A. 16 November 2013: i don't think you're wrong for how you feel. i'm also 29 and i know what you're going through. most of my friends are married and settling in their careers, etc. however, i also don't think he's necessarily in the wrong, either. for the most part, ... (read in full...)
Is he or is he not interested in me?
Q. Hi all, I have written on here before and I got really good advice from you all. Very good. I have met someone who I've seen around for more than a year now but have only spoken twice before he found me on Facebook and started chatting. He ask...
A. 16 November 2013: how long ago was the date? if it was within the last week or two, i would say just relax and take it one day a time. however, if it's been over a few weeks to a month, i would proably assume this means he wasn't interested in being more than friends ... (read in full...)
She let me come back but she's making me pay
Q. One and half years ago, I dumped my 4 years old girlfriend, was feeling bored in relationship. She was begging for next 8 months to come back in her life but I didn't. Between I tried different dates and they didn't work for me. So like 40 days ...
A. 16 November 2013: you don't think that any gf can treat her bf like she's treating you? news flash, but you deserve every bit of it. if i speak honestly, you don't deserve her back at all. you should count your blessings for getting to do her laundry and clean her ... (read in full...)
I took him back but the butterflies are gone
Q. I have a problem. My ex and I just got back together, out of nowhere. He broke up with me in an awful way, he cut me off with no words, nothing, and went to another girl. We finally talked and he said some lame excuses for why he ended it. Well he ...
A. 16 November 2013: if the feelings are gone and you don't see yourself even wanting to be with this guy, which it sounds legit if you ask me, then why waste your time? your feelings are mostly gone and the spark is gone and you still desire being with other men. so ... (read in full...)
How do I get my boyfriend to listen to me when I need to talk to him seriously?
Q. I am so unhappy with my long distance boyfriend of 3 years but every time I try to initiate a talk he starts shouting or tells me I'm a nag or puts the phone down on me. I can't even tell him I want to break up with him because if I manage to say ...
A. 15 November 2013: How do you get him to listen? You hang up the phone and then don't pick it back up.
When he tries to call back, you don't answer and ignore him until he gets the message. He's a bully. And behaving like a child. If he's incapable of having a... (read in full...)
How do I get the guy I'm dating to tone it down a little? He's too playful!
Q. I've just started seeing a new guy. We aren't "boyfriend/girlfriend" yet, but it is definitely heading that way. I'm 20 and he is 19. I really like him and I know he likes me too, but he is all over me! He will come over to watch a film and just ...
A. 15 November 2013: You say you want to wait a bit to do anything besides kissing and then he starts grabbing your ass and boobs? To me the stomach would be the least of my worries. That's not respecting your boundaries.
I would get extremely annoyed by this as ... (read in full...)
Rooming situation is destroying me
Q. Help! I am stuck in a roommate situation with a former best friend, but living with her has made literally everything she does annoying. We bonded at first about being high strung people back in high school. But she is diagnosed OCD and thus say...
A. 15 November 2013: best advice i can give is just hang in there. you're halfway there. then you are FREE.
a lot of eating disorders tend to go hand in hand with OCD. is it possible she's a binge eater, therefore, when you throw away her food, she panics? or is it si... (read in full...)
My partner is very good looking but I have no sexual attraction to him
Q. My partner is the male version of me. Before I met him, I was fully convinced there was no one else like me out there, and that I was doomed to spend my life alone. I'm "different", always have been. I'm extremely introverted, to the point where ...
A. 15 November 2013: you can't force physical attraction. if it's not there, it's not there. ... (read in full...)
A beauty you fancy turned out to have had major plastic surgery done. Would it bother you?
Q. Right so this is a toughie. I'm hoping you guys can help me...cause I really need it!! I met a girl several weeks ago at a club. A real stunner. Beautiful green eyes, blonde hair, lovely figure, very high cheekbones, full lips. She was chatting...
A. 15 November 2013: i mean, compare your average looking man to johnny depp or david beckham or whoever you consider ridiculously attractive. if you saw him in a bar standing next to a plain looking man; your average, run-of-the-mill dude, would you not find yourself ... (read in full...)
A beauty you fancy turned out to have had major plastic surgery done. Would it bother you?
Q. Right so this is a toughie. I'm hoping you guys can help me...cause I really need it!! I met a girl several weeks ago at a club. A real stunner. Beautiful green eyes, blonde hair, lovely figure, very high cheekbones, full lips. She was chatting...
A. 15 November 2013: perhaps she did get tired of being considered "plain" and average looking. however, are there not millions of men who get over-looked by women for the very same thing? you can't really get mad at him or blame him for finding someone more attractive ... (read in full...)
I tagged him on fb and he didn't respond and now I don't know how to act
Q. i have a huge crush on a guy who is not in my class in college but he used to show signs of liking me too.even though we dont speak to each other we're frens on fb where he answers only when i speak first.a few days ago i tagged him and some of my ...
A. 15 November 2013: Does he use Facebook regularly? I often miss posts and comments from others because I just don't really pay attention to fb. Is this possible??
He might just not have gotten it. I ignore things all the time, as well. ... (read in full...)
Does it make any sense to forgive him and try to move on together?
Q. I have posted here before..I really need my awesome aunt and uncles help again. My boyfriend and I just got back together. We were split up for two months. We split up because one day he just wouldnt return my calls or texts. 4 days go by, I delete ...
A. 15 November 2013: Do what your heart tells you. Maybe he learned from this. But I wholeheartedly believe he's full of it. ... (read in full...)
His track record of one-night-stands really showed when we finally got intimate
Q. Hi aunts, Some advice would be great! Around 8 months ago I walked away from my 4 year relationship after not being happy for a long time. It was the right decision for myself and the relationship I feel. Around 5 months ago I met anoth...
A. 14 November 2013: first of all, keep in mind that men lie about the number of women they've slept with. i highly doubt it's been 28. maybe 10 to 15.
moving on.
i'm a girl, however, i'm gay and i used to be like this guy when it came to dating. i was really int... (read in full...)
Does it make any sense to forgive him and try to move on together?
Q. I have posted here before..I really need my awesome aunt and uncles help again. My boyfriend and I just got back together. We were split up for two months. We split up because one day he just wouldnt return my calls or texts. 4 days go by, I delete ...
A. 14 November 2013: okay, here's exactly what happened. he met this girl, most likely had a thing behind your back for a while (not necessarily, but more likely than not), and then decided to leave you for her. once he got the green light with this girl to be together, ... (read in full...)
A beauty you fancy turned out to have had major plastic surgery done. Would it bother you?
Q. Right so this is a toughie. I'm hoping you guys can help me...cause I really need it!! I met a girl several weeks ago at a club. A real stunner. Beautiful green eyes, blonde hair, lovely figure, very high cheekbones, full lips. She was chatting...
A. 14 November 2013: in all fairness, i think it's being a little harsh calling him superficial and judgmental. in actuality, technically, would not the girl who got all the surgery done be the superficial one? while he was simply saying he wants an all-natural woman. i ... (read in full...)
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