A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:So, it started back in 2010 when I met this boy and we were just friends with benefits.. I started to really like him and he said he didn't want anything more and then he just randomly got a girlfriend with this girl I disliked at the time. So, recently they split up and he got back in contact with me and we were chatting but nothing more. Then one night he asked him to stay over his so I did but we didnt have sex or anything and he was really annoyed by that so he didn't speak to me for a few weeks. But, a few nights ago he rang me and he was telling me he misses me and what not and he asked me to go his the following night which I did, Iit was the nicest night ever with him, then we had sex... but it wasn't awkward or anything then he dropped me home. But he texted me after saying 'pal;)' then I replied 'haha;)' with no response. I just really like him still maybe even in love with me? I always feel like im annoying him by texting him but he hardly ever texts me. What do I do? How can I forget about him? Thanks :)
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friend with benefits, split up, text Reply to this Question
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female
reader, babyzbird  +, writes (18 November 2013):
 The reason why you feel like you are annoying him when you text him is because you really ARE annoying him. FWB means using each other for sex without a relationship. It's very clear that he only wants you for sex. From his actions he doesn't even value you as a friend. Why are you letting him use you like this? If you want a relationship then tell him....bluntly. Guys don't understand hints. Though to give you a warning he does not want to be your boyfriend. He doesn't care about you. He only wants sex. If you really want to be in a relationship then I would end contact with this guy and actually date people....not have sex with them. If you are really serious about finding a relationship don't have sex with your dates until you are boyfriend/girlfriend.
A
male
reader, Sageoldguy1465  +, writes (17 November 2013):
 I guess you're not acquainted with "Textspeak"....
You see, "PAL" means "Penis At-Large".....
Hope this helps....
Good luck.....
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (17 November 2013): If you're texting about anything other than when you'll meet up for sex again then yes, you're being very annoying.
OP be a good girl, shut your mouth about all this emotional feelings crap and keep your legs open.
That's your job here, a warm hole to stick it in while he gets over his ex. Don't worry about forgetting him, in a few months when he's done with you he'll throw you away again and you'll be forgotten until he needs your pussy again.
Now stop complicating this whole deal with emotions, there are none. Only the ones you think there are just enough to justify to yourself being used by him.
So keep doing that, be his flesh puppet and stop complaining. You're better than having to use his hand, so be nice and charitable and be fleshy fuck doll for as long as he needs it, then smile when he says he's done and has found someone else.
Or you can take the advice of the other posters, personally I think should stay being his easy lay, you obviously didn't get hurt enough to learn your lesson the first time, you need the utter desolation of being used again to make you truly see how stupid you've been and that feelings never matter more than the reality of what's going.
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A
female
reader, shna  +, writes (17 November 2013):
 This boy is just using you as a FWB once again and ur to in love with him to see that.
Let me lay it out like this
You started out as FWB
You began to get feelings & he rejected them & made it clear to you that he was only interested in the sexual side of your relationship
He then got a girlfriend
Him & his girlfriend break up and all of a sudden he seeks interest in you once again
SHOCK HORROR he gets pissed off when you wont have sex with him
Then wait for it- you give in and have sec with him and he is now back to believing you are FWB once again
Your setting yourself out for heartbreak
He sees you as a friend and he will never see you as anymore
This situation is not going to turn out like it did mila kunis and justin!
He is on the rebound & not looking for anything serious
Let go sweetie your worthy of love so much better then his
Dont let him string you along
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (17 November 2013): FWB has emotional limitations. When you start getting affected by his lack of contact and wondering what's going on with your f-buddy; you are starting to intrude on his/her other "personal-life." Your purpose in his life is strictly sex. He's not going to let you turn it into anything else.If you are truly only "friends;" no one has to account for his or her time. You can answer his texts whenever you darn well please; and leave him hanging just as he does you.You're becoming emotionally-attached. That's a sign you should be looking for something more. Don't become dependent on this guy. He's not worth it. Turn off the faucet, you've filled too many glasses for him. Let him find sex somewhere else.Don't attach your feelings and start putting "love" into. You'll get hurt.
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A
female
reader, So_Very_Confused +, writes (17 November 2013):
 Oh dear sweetie... he is USING YOU FOR SEX.... he's NEVER EVER going to be what you want him to be.
STOP having sex with him and watch him disappear again...
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A
female
reader, KC12 +, writes (17 November 2013):
 I always say FWB doesn't work. 9 times out of 10 One person always develops feelings for the other, and then the other pulls away...
in this case, you are the one developing feelings and he is pulling away.
You are letting yourself get used by this guy, and that's not good. Your self esteem will be ruined if you keep going on like this.
If you want to get over him, just break free! Stop talking to him, stop texting him.
Then, time and distance will help get you over him.
Good luck with this.
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A
female
reader, pinktopaz +, writes (17 November 2013):
You need to go No Contact. Look it up.
That way you can work on yourself and hopefully get over him. Or at least build your confidence enough to screw with his head when he tries to come back.
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A
female
reader, Daisy_Daisy +, writes (17 November 2013):
 His motives are obvious as an outsider. He wants sex from you and no more. He sees you as no more than a f-buddy, not even a pal or friend. Sorry.
You have strong feelings. I highly advise staying away from him so stop those feelings getting even stronger. As said below, you'll get hurt.
Start off by deleting his number so you're not tempted to text him. If he calls again saying he misses you, remember that what he means is he misses sex.
Look after yourself.
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A
female
reader, Honeypie + ♥, writes (17 November 2013):
 He didn't RANDOMLY date a chick. He DATED her because she wouldn't put out or play "FWB", like you.
He doesn't care for you in the way you would like because 1. if he DID he would be pissed of by NOT getting sex when you came over and 2. calling you pal. You don't call a girl you REALLY dig, pal.
How can you forget him? By blocking his number and STOP having contact with him. HE DOESN'T like you the same way YOU like him, I don't think he ever will. Accept that he SEES you as "good enough" to FUCK but nothing more. You could be ANY chick to him. Any chick willing to put out that is. Is that how you see yourself? Good enough for a romp and that is it?
He even took you HOME after sex, so it's not like he wanted to SPEND the night with you.
Don't agree with FWB just to please the guy. IF you WANT to DATE a guy, then don't have SEX til you two are in a relationship. IT's not really all that hard.
Have a little more self-respect. Want more for yourself and how people treat you. No woman should be treated like a walking convenient vagina.
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A
female
reader, llifton +, writes (17 November 2013):
 He called you pal for a reason. He was reiterating he isn't into you *that * way. If you like him, definitely put some distance between you two because you will wind up hurt in this circumstance. Find a man who wants to be with you.
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