How do anonymous flings and oral sex differ from having sex with someone you know?
Q. One of the hardest aspects of my being able to accept, get over, and not think about my wife's one night fling (she gave and received oral sex with a total stranger who was much older than her - she didn't, still doesn't know his name) is to ...
A. 8 June 2010: She isn't the one with the problem. You are. You should be apologizing and validating HER for your obsessive treatment of her past before you. She shouldn't be smoothing your ruffled feathers forever.... (read in full...)
I was crushed by my crush!
Q. Ok, so I like my best friend's cousin, and i thought he liked me to. My friend seid she was pretty sure he did and then his friend texted me and seid that he thought my crush liked me back. After that 2 of my crush's friends asked me if i liked him ...
A. 3 June 2010: You blew off his friends and then asked HIM if he liked you. Of course he's going to crush you. He heard from his friends that you thought of him only as a friend. The fact that it took 15 minutes for him to answer you means HE LIKES YOU!!!!
... (read in full...)
I love him but he left me because of a compatibility test!
Q. Hi I need help. I am so confused. I have been dating this man for 10 mths. We met on match.com. We have had a great time together. Now he is questioning out compatability long term. He says I'm a wonderful person, good looking, kind, caring, I ...
A. 3 June 2010: Sorry, but the guy is an absolute moron who is blaming his issues on religion. Tell him that he just threw away the best thing he ever had because of some stupid fallable compatibility test that was only created to make a company MORE MONEY. Do ... (read in full...)
I hacked his Facebook and found out that he's cheating! Do I tell my friend?
Q. Right I'm such a bad person i know but i used to like this guy , recently i found out hes being hacking onto my facebook :/ bad so i thought right im gonna do it to him , i got his password off someone and i know this is bad but i was reading his ...
A. 3 June 2010: That's a tough one. I'd probably just outright tell her how you found out. I'd print up the emails as proof.... (read in full...)
I'm scared I could be pregnant!
Q. About two weeks after my last period, my boyfriend and I had unprotected sex multiple times and I ended up taking the morning after pill. It has now been about six weeks since my last period and I'm thinking I could be pregnant. I haven't had any ...
A. 3 June 2010: Oh yeah. Definitely you could be pregnant. Pick up a pregnancy test to make sure.... (read in full...)
The guy I like is my dad's age! How do I tell my parents?
Q. Okay… I’ll try to make a long story (kind of) short here. I am 17, turning 18 in several months, and I’m a girl. There’s this guy I had a crush on from the time I was 14. He is 30 years older than me. I saw him on a regular basis for a couple of ...
A. 3 June 2010: Make sure you do not make a move on this guy until you turn 18, as you are ILLEGAL as a minor and can get him thrown in jail.
Also, be EXTREMELY careful with anyone you meet online, especially a guy who is a lot older. If you meet him, do not m... (read in full...)
My boyfriend is annoying! What do I do?
Q. Well my bf is kinda childish. I mean he pokes me when he wants me to pay attention to him, and he hangs on em somtimes. He follows me around even if it causes him trouble. Hes like an annoying parasite sometimes. When i try to say something he ...
A. 3 June 2010: Ahh...he's being clingy/needy. That *is* tough. The only thing you can do is tell him exactly how you feel. Ignore his depression and lay it out on the line. The thing about needy/clingy people is that they're really good at playing victim and ... (read in full...)
What do I do about a boy who I like that acts like he likes me but has a girlfriend?
Q. *OP's suggested title* Dear Cupid, I have a huge crush on a boy in my school. We use to be normal friend a few talks here and there. But now we hang out in our classes all the time. I sent him a flirty facebook message one time saying he should...
A. 3 June 2010: Put yourself in his girlfriend's place. Would you date and like a guy who has no problems flirting with other girls while he was your girlfriend?
If he cheats on this other girl with you, how do you think he'll treat you if YOU were the one dati... (read in full...)
Can a girl like you after saying I think we should be friends?
Q. "OPs Own Title" Do you think its a possibility that a Girl who wants to be just friends. After being friends for long while hanging out and all that stuff that makes her more comfortable around you. That she can like you again? I mean I guess yo...
A. 3 June 2010: Well, it could go either way. I told a guy I was friends with and hung out with that I wasn't interested in him and that I just wanted to be friends. This year we're about to celebrate 12 years of marriage. :)... (read in full...)
Will sex hurt the first time?
Q. ok...ummm me and my boyfriend are going to have sex soon but im a little scared about it cuz i dont want it to hurt,,,,does it hurt????? will i bleed??? i want to know what im getting myself in to before...thanks...
A. 2 June 2010: Man, you are young! Are you sure you are able to cope with the risks of sex? (Pregnancy, STD) Is he the type of guy who will stand by you in the consequences of the risks?
BE SAFE! BE SAFE! BE SAFE! Use a condom, and use it properly... (read in full...)
He would date her if he was single! Should I be worried?
Q. hey everyone! my boyfriend of 5years told my best friend that if he was single he would totally date this girl let's call her X! and he asked my best frend if this X is single! should I be worried?? and my boyfriend and this X text each other.a...
A. 2 June 2010: Oh yeah, you should be worried. He's blatantly said he's attracted to her and is keeping up communication with her.
You could pre-empt getting dumped by being the one to break it off with him. You can't tie down someone whose heart is going in... (read in full...)
He cheated on me with his ex and I can't get over it!
Q. Hello...looking for advice...I must be stuck on stupid...Its been about 6 months ago that I started dating my ex boyfriend. We had a bad fight last year he said some horrible things. We had dated for 3 years, into the second year he cheated on me ...
A. 2 June 2010: Well, he did cheat on you, and he has emotional baggage when it comes to his ex. No wonder you can't trust him. I wouldn't!
Your problem is that you are comfortable in your situation, yet you are not happy in it. You have a choice - stay the... (read in full...)
He cheated and then almost killed himself! Do I give him another chance?
Q. hello. i need help.... MY boyfriend of 8 months has been cheating on me with his ex.. on day i was hanging out at home when his ex girlfriend came to my house and told meh everything. ill tell u the convorsation " Yeah. hes been h...
A. 2 June 2010: Drop him. He is manipulating you with his suicide threats and self harm. He doesn't love you if he's lying and being with his ex. He's the worst kind of selfish jerk.
You have no obligation to help him. Do NOT give him any chances. He carri... (read in full...)
My husband cheated and I know all the details! Help!
Q. how can i get past the thought of my husband havin sex with an 18 yr old that i have know for a while now? i dont just know that they had sex i know details! where how what. all the nasty details no one wants to know. i trusted not just my husband ...
A. 2 June 2010: Well, you need a strategy. Before confronting him, you need to decide what you want to do. Do you want to leave him, or do you want to work things out with him? If you want to leave him, you need to have an "exit strategy" where you have the ... (read in full...)
I want to be with him but others will judge me!
Q. Hi, Okay so there's this guy and we were going to start seeing eachother, but then he drunkenly announced that he had a gf after 2 weeks of me going out of contact because i had no internet, or credit, so i got really annoyed and told him i hated ...
A. 2 June 2010: This guy sounds like BAD news. How can he make you happy?? He sounds like a flaky sort of guy. You can't trust him, and what happened to this GF he says he got??
Sounds like it's Drama City, and this guy's the mayor.... (read in full...)
I'm unhappy! Should I just accept it?
Q. Hi there. I'm a 22 year old female, and life is beginning to get on top of me. I have been with my boyfriend for 3 years and we live together, theres quite a large age gap he has his own company and works from home and I work in sales for a phon...
A. 2 June 2010: Aww man. I'm sorry to hear what happened to you. I am a musician myself (keyboards), and it SUCKS when a band throws you under the bus after you put your heart and soul into it. It's just as bad as a romantic breakup or divorce on your life and ... (read in full...)
I fantasize about guys! Am I straight, bi or just really horny?
Q. im a bit confused right now with my sexuality .I have always liked girls and i still do .I love them but i like anal n when i realy horny i thikn of a girl givin it to me then somtimes a ithink of guys but id only let them bum be . i couldent kiss a ...
A. 2 June 2010: It's just hormones, and sexuality isn't always cut and dry. Go ahead and explore and don't worry about it! You're a kid, and you are extremely horny. LOL... (read in full...)
I moved to be with him and now he only cares about himself!
Q. I've been dating my boyfriend for almost a year and we live together. He is a great guy, don't get me wrong, very generous, loving, affectionate, and kind. There is however, and I've noticed this more lately, a very selfish side to him. He's an ...
A. 2 June 2010: This one's easy. You should get your own separate life with your own separate friends and your own separate hobbies. This guy cares about you, but he is set in his ways. He's 20 years older than you, so he's used to his own established life. You ... (read in full...)
I haven't had an orgasm in 10 months and he won't give me one!
Q. I've been with my boyfriend for 3 years now, and he is the ONLY person to ever get me off. Orally of course, but I got off none the less. My issue is that he hasn't gone down on me for 10 monthes. And his reasons vary depending on when I ask him ...
A. 2 June 2010: Hmm...well, I would suggest taking care of yourself! Why wait for him?? Learn about your own body and give yourself relief! Don't pin your entire ability to release on this guy or any guy.
And why give him what he wants and have him leave yo... (read in full...)
She still chokes me to death with her conrolling nature
Q. I know that God takes care of us, if we take care of ourselves. Somehow I've made dumb relationship decisions. I realize again and again that I'm a terrible judge of personality and that I end up with girls who are very controlling and jealous. I ...
A. 2 June 2010: Listen to me very carefully:
SHE WILL NOT CHANGE.
If you two get married/engaged/more committed, that controlling personality will only ramp up about 5 notches. You need to set the boundaries right now, or you'll lose your freedom and beco... (read in full...)
He's not sure if there is an "us"
Q. I really, really need some input here. I have been with my current BF for almost 8 yrs.He's 31, I'm 40. He has a job that takes him away from home most weeknights, and when he is home he's too tired to go out and do anything together, which I can ...
A. 2 June 2010: The part about the job taking him from home and making him too tired to go out with you, and the lack of a sex life is kinda the death knell on the relationship. He is taking you for granted, and now is in search for something else in life.
... (read in full...)
She wants to wait to have sex! How do I change her mind?
Q. So I have been going out with my girlfriend for 8 months now. I ask her if she wants to have sex and her reply is "I think I want to wait". How can I change her reply to a "Yes!"?...
A. 2 June 2010: The only way you can change it is to handle your answer with grace and acceptance and prove to her that you're not after her for sex. If she's the same age as you, she may feel that she's not old enough to do it. And that's a valid consideration, ... (read in full...)
Is she ready to have sex?
Q. My name is Danny and im 16 years old. I'm very much ready for sex, beleive it or not, and I want to have sex with my girlfriend. WE hang out a lot and she talks about doing all of these freaky things but i don't know if she is really serious or not. ...
A. 2 June 2010: You could have the conversation in a non-threatening, non pressure way and leave the ball in her court. Just tell her how you feel about her as a person. She's probably thinking about the same thing you are and mulling over whether or not she's ... (read in full...)
He wants kids but I already have them and don't want more...
Q. I love my boyfriend. I want us to be together, but as time goes on I have begun realizing more and more that I do not want any more children ( I have 2 from a previous relationship). He has expressed a desire to have one or two children of his own. ...
A. 2 June 2010: The issue of kids is a pretty serious deal breaker for a relationship if one person adamantly doesn't want kids and the other deeply wants them. It's not fair to hope the other one changes because even if one person changes to conform to the ... (read in full...)
If a guy mentions how attractive he is to you, do you think he likes you?
Q. Hey. I need some advice. If a guy mentions how attractive he is to you, do you think he likes you? I was just wondering if this guy liked me. There have been other incidences, but I wondered about the attractive comment. Thanks :)...
A. 2 June 2010: He said how attractive *HE* is to you? He didn't mention how attractive YOU are to him??? Heh...yes, he likes you, but he's using the cheap "I'm arrogant" vibe that he thinks will get the girl. He's trying to impress you. Sounds like a closet ... (read in full...)
He thinks he's too young to settle down!
Q. ive been with my boyfriend for 2 years. we never argue and we are great together. recently he has been thinking that hes too young to settle down because hes only 17 and says hes bored. he tells me he loves me, but he wants more excitement in ou...
A. 2 June 2010: Most guys at 17 have wanderlust and want to go out and sow their wild oats. I don't think there's anything you can do to spice up the relationship like he wants it. You can't compromise your morals to try and please him, because in the end, he'll ... (read in full...)
Will an STD result come up in blood work or do I have to specifically ask for it?
Q. I have had a horrendous few weeks. My boyfriend of 6 years (I am 20) we got together when we were 14 has cheated on me. And at first I thought I could get over this but I found out there was a hell a lot of girls (sexting, kissing, meeting up ...
A. 2 June 2010: Yep, you have to go to the Dr. for the express reason for testing for STD's. Explain what happened and ask for the whole battery of tests. Sorry this happened to you. :(... (read in full...)
Does a relationship really happen because of butterflies?
Q. My ex girlfriend told me that she wants to be single and we should just be friends. I can honestly say we have love for eachother but she doesn't think our relationship will go anywhere. She met a guy a couple days ago and she told me that he gives ...
A. 2 June 2010: **checks self** I'm a female! I qualify! :D
First of all, I'm sorry she said that to you. But you don't have to take it as a reflection of YOU. It happens all the time - a relationship starts, but as the two people get to know each other, o... (read in full...)
How can I get him to overcome his principles and self control and give us a chance or am I wasting my time?
Q. Having been celibate for a long time, I met a guy I really like. The attraction between us is incredible but he will not give in to it as he thinks I have 'issues' (true!) and to see problems develop as a relationship grows is one thing but he feels ...
A. 1 June 2010: Are you pressuring him to have sex with you? if his principles are such that he doesn't want a sexual relationship, tell him that you two won't have one, and that you want to get to know him better as a person.
Otherwise, CaringGuy is right. ... (read in full...)
He says there is "no spark"
Q. my boyfriend and i have been together for over 7 months now, and lately we've been having a few problems. He says there's no 'spark' in our relationship anymore. when i asked him what he meant he said that he doesn't miss me as much as he used to ...
A. 1 June 2010: Marieclaire hit it right on the head, and I agree 100%. It takes two to generate "spark" and your boyfriend has to know that he's 50% of the spark problem. I'd tell him that it was over, and that he's free to pursue the spark. However, that me... (read in full...)
Wife feels betrayed by husband's big mouth
Q. I made a doctor appoitment with a specialist at a very prestigous clinic for a chronic problem I have and I asked my husband that he please not tell anyone that I was going because I did not want any questions about it. I feel it is up to me to ...
A. 1 June 2010: Does he have an ultra-close family? Yeah, he blew it when he disclosed what you wanted to be just between you. Is this the first time he's done that to you?
I guess the only thing I can say is - don't tell him what you don't want to get arou... (read in full...)
I am scared that my partner might leave me when I get old.
Q. I am scared that my partner might leave me when I get old. I was 22 and my partner was 37 when we started dating. I am now 24. His previous girlfriend was only 20 when she got with him and he was 32. His first girlfriend however was one year ...
A. 1 June 2010: Did he say why he left his 20 year old girlfriend? I'm thinking it's most likely her maturity level and place she was at in her life. Most 20 year olds are into school, partying, their girlfriend entourage, and guys (multiple). ... (read in full...)
How can we spend more quality time together alone?
Q. My fiance' works 7 days a week, owns his own business, has 3 children (2 at home). My only child is out on his own. Problem is, fiance' can't seem to make time for me. He's either at work, on phone with work, or on computer watching work. Then ...
A. 1 June 2010: Well, he got to the point of asking you to marry him. Is this 7-days per week a new thing, or has he had this business for awhile? Did he have the business and the workload when you met him?
If it's a new business, he's just gung ho about it... (read in full...)
I've noticed the way the boss is looking at me
Q. I had a meeting with my boss and he kept looking at my breast and was intentionally trying to keep me there for longer than necessary. I have noticed the way he looks at me and is trying to help me in my career. I am trying to work out how to ...
A. 1 June 2010: You like him? I guess it's up to you if you want to mix the personal and professional aspects of your life. ... (read in full...)
I'm worried because he's talking to this other girl
Q. So i been dating my boyfriend for almost 5 years an things have been pretty good. The first 3 years since he tended to break up with me for some other girls. Only because his parents didnt have a good relationship an it freaked him out whenever it ...
A. 1 June 2010: Sounds like this guy has serious intimacy and maturity problems. As much as you don't want to hear this, the force of your love will not change him. He isn't in a place to be serious with a girl. I'd drop him, truthfully, and let him find his own ... (read in full...)
Why do I lose interest after I've masturbated?
Q. Why is it that every time I masturbate, as soon as I ejaculate I immediately lose interest. I mean i just stop, clean up, and go on about my day like it never happened. I don't like this because I...when masturbating have deep fantasies, but as soon ...
A. 1 June 2010: That's easy. Because you've "finished". All people have a "rocovery" period after sex/masturbation. Don't worry about it - it's normal. It'll be different when you're actually with someone because you'll still have feelings for them after you ... (read in full...)
How do anonymous flings and oral sex differ from having sex with someone you know?
Q. One of the hardest aspects of my being able to accept, get over, and not think about my wife's one night fling (she gave and received oral sex with a total stranger who was much older than her - she didn't, still doesn't know his name) is to ...
A. 1 June 2010: You've gotta chill out. You need to make a serious choice. You can either love your wife UNCONDITIONALLY, or you can get hung up about a choice she made before she met you. If you let this continue to eat you up, it will erode your relationship ... (read in full...)
Should I tell my friend about what happened with her brother?
Q. So I’ve managed go get myself into another difficult situation and I’m not sure how to proceed about it. About a month ago after a particularly difficult day where I had just ended an off and on again relationship. Not because I no longer had feel...
A. 1 June 2010: Oh geeze. Well, she's your best friend. Normally, I'd say to keep it between you two, but she will find out anyways eventually. Would you rather have her just be mad at you for having a one night stand with her other brother, or would you have ... (read in full...)
He's amazing, but contacting him is nearly impossible
Q. My boyfriend of a few weeks has already flaked out on me (without calls to let me know) twice. I really like this guy and when he spends time with me, he's utterly amazing. But getting a hold of him is nearly impossible. Should I stick with it and ...
A. 1 June 2010: Hmmm. I think I need more info on the nature of his absence before I can advise you.
Does he have a job that makes it hard to contact you? Does it seem that he disappears on the holidays or on weekends? Does he not call/text/email you back... (read in full...)
I still worry about him and other girls
Q. My bf of two years knows A LOT of girls. Which would usually be fine. But we had a row about a year ago, cos he met up with an ex behind my back, but we sorted it through and I forgave him. But...the damage still remains and I find it tricky to ...
A. 1 June 2010: Did he meet up with her and cheat on you? Or did he just meet up with her for coffee and closure? Did you catch him, or did he come clean on his own?
Have you been cheated on before with another guy? Only you can decide if your level of trust... (read in full...)
Can you really go from being bi curious to straight?
Q. Right here goes x im 17, ive been with my boyfriend since we were 13 and i love him to pieces. the thing is, he's always been openly bisexual, and ive always accepted that as part of who he is and i love him despite that, i honestly have no...
A. 1 June 2010: Oh yeah. He's young and sexuality is never cut and dried. Many people have lived a straight life in their younger years before discovering (or allowing themselves to recognize) that they were gay. The same has been true in reverse.
Many ... (read in full...)
Am I a man whore???
Q. Okay so people keep calling me these names and I'm just sick of it. I'm 17 and I'm gay. The think is I get turned on very easily and am very friendly and flirtatious. So I tend to flirt with a lot of guys... and some girls too. And even when not ...
A. 1 June 2010: Nah, you've gotta be yourself! Too many people out there have hangups that cause them to be terrified about what other people think. You see it in the similar way that people dress, in the inhibitions that exist without the presence of alcohol, ... (read in full...)
How do anonymous flings and oral sex differ from having sex with someone you know?
Q. One of the hardest aspects of my being able to accept, get over, and not think about my wife's one night fling (she gave and received oral sex with a total stranger who was much older than her - she didn't, still doesn't know his name) is to ...
A. 31 May 2010: First of all, she's not with this guy. She's with you, and take it from me: Sex with an anonymous stranger for a one night stand isn't all it's cracked up to be. I guarantee that she gains 50x more pleasure and meaning from being with you who she ... (read in full...)
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