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*abrielle Stoker agony aunt

*abrielle Stoker

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*abrielle Stoker's profile:

Qualified to help people? Don't really know. Am in my twenties, currently working in the hospitality industry. Very open-minded on sex, probably too active for my own good. Flatter myself into thinking I'm reasonably intelligent and believe that my upbringing, difficult as it was, has given me a decent perspective on life.

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My wife expects me to entertain her, she has no hobbies and blames me that she is lonely

Q.   Im 28, my wife is 23. We moved in together after 5 years of dating 7 months ago and finally got married last month. Ever since we moved in together shes been complaining that shes lonely, and how we dont spend enough time together and wha...

A.   26 September 2015: YouWish has put it across well. I think this happens a lot these days. I'm sure she has some hobbies that maybe she hasn't developed int the past. Why not encourage her to re-discover them? And try to do more fun things together. Please, please ... (read in full...)

What can I do? First he refused me. Then I caught my husband watching porn and masturbating in the middle of the night!!

Q.   Please help me!!! I caught my husband watching porn and masturbating in the middle of the night!! Early that night I wanted to have sex with my husband. I kissed and touched him, but he was too busy playing with his phone and completely ignored ...

A.   31 July 2015: While porn has been known to kill sex life in couples, you need to think about whether this is a one-off or it happens often. Are you two otherwise sexually compatible? Are there other reasons for his being sexually unavailable at times? Stress is a ... (read in full...)

Is it normal to end up having a real dislike of your first love?

Q.   Is it normal to end up having a real dislike of your first love? The fact is - when I was at college 20 years ago - I fell for this guy and we started dating ( my first proper relationship). It lasted on and off for about 6-7 years and then we...

A.   28 July 2015: It's quite common. We grow up. We learn to laugh at ourselves from when we were younger. Some of us even start disliking who we were when we were that age. If liking yourself is optional, what chance do other people have? If he is not someone ... (read in full...)

I'm horny and unsatisfied but not sure if I'n ready for sex

Q.   Dear Cupid, is it normal to feel horny most of the time? I am 17 (which is the legal age for sex) and I have a boyfriend. I dont want to pressure him into anything though as I am not sure he's ready. But I feel really horny a lot of the time and ...

A.   28 July 2015: When I was your age I was also horny and felt ready. I was giving it up to anyone who asked. Stupid of me, right? Got a reputation, my parents had to put up with HUGE embarrassment, and while I am able to accept now that this is who I am, if I could ... (read in full...)

Is it normal to like lesbian porn?

Q.   Is it normal that I am a straight girl but enjoy lesbian porn?...

A.   28 July 2015: Yes. Sexuality does not fit into neat little boxes anyway.... (read in full...)

I can't stand living at home any more but my mother wants me to continue living at home. How can I stand up to her reasoning on this?

Q.   I am 23, just graduated from college, and looking for a new job as a registered nurse. I have had a few interviews, and have a good feeling about some of them. However, some of them are quite far from where I live now, yet my mom is against me movi...

A.   28 July 2015: I think you already know the answer, OP. You're at an age when you should give your career priority. Don't move for the sake of it, to get away from family, but if the best opportunities you have are away from home, take them. Families complain... (read in full...)

Three years together and my Gf has asked me to pay ($5000) towards a medical procedure she wants. What would you do if in my situation?

Q.   I'm in a serious relationship with my girlfriend for the past 3 years. She's always been independent and has never asked me for anything. For the past couple of months however she has been thinking of getting a surgery that insurance won't help wit...

A.   28 July 2015: I am not sure this question can be answered without understanding some of the points, at least, that the other Aunt's are asking. Is it purely cosmetic? Is this something you both want her to do? ... (read in full...)

Am I letting him down when I'm unwilling to have virtual sex with my LDR boyfriend?

Q.   My LDR boyfriend often wants virtual sex where we are on Webcam. Thing is, he doesn't do the sweet talk or sexy talk.. he just wants to see and then he masturbates and is finished within 2 minutes... while I have yet to feel anything. This is w...

A.   28 July 2015: Typing doesn't work for some. Didn't work for me either. No matter what my man I do, I can't get off just on chat or a webcam. If everything else is good, maybe you can talk this through, though? Like I said, perhaps he isn't good at being se... (read in full...)

Friendship only: How can I tell him that I want friendship and no more than that?

Q.   Hello everyone A couple of months ago I met a man. We're both in our late 50s and single. We live about 100 miles apart and have met up four times and had a great time. He always gives me big hugs hello and goodbye, and he bought me flowers...

A.   28 July 2015: It's best to be upfront about it. The next time you meet, perhaps while talking, bring up the fact that you're single and would like it to remain that way, a good way to express it without saying you have a problem with him, as such. But however ... (read in full...)

I enjoy sex but hate to think I have a bad reputation

Q.   I am a single 22 year old woman and enjoy sex. I have had sex with a total of ten guys since i was 17 and can go a few months without any sexual interaction. Yet i am worried i come across slutty when i do go home with someone. I am always safe but ...

A.   12 September 2014: You need to decide how much it affects you. I'm not a good example, being actually quite worthy of being called a slut, but nonetheless, I think you should accept that while you may not always fit in with society's expectations - which are ... (read in full...)

Am I wrong to consider porn cheating?

Q.   So my boyfriend and I have been dating for almost 2 years and the relationship is going pretty well so far. The only thing that really bothers me, and I have expressed myself, is the fact he watches porn on his days off while I'm at work. In my ...

A.   12 September 2014: It's one of those things on which your mileage may vary. I think it would be harsh to consider it cheating, but if it is something that displeases you then you should bring it up again. More a case of not listening to you than cheating on you, tec... (read in full...)

Has "nice guy" become a derogatory term?

Q.   It seems like when you call someone a "nice guy" it seems as if it has some sort of negative connotation to it as if it is synonymous with loser, wimp, geek/nerd, pushover etc. basically anything that would be viewed as unattractive to the opposite ...

A.   3 May 2014: If a guy calls himself a nice guy, the odds are that he's kind of needy and low on confidence and not a little bitter because he thinks women don't like him because he's a "nice guy". If I call someone a nice guy, it means I'll probably be havin... (read in full...)

Do women think the key to attracting men is to dress like sluts?

Q.   Hi this question is not specific to one specific relationship but more on a general level, in my effort to meet someone. I'm curious about why when going out on say a Friday or Saturday night, young (and not so young) women feel the need to dress ...

A.   3 May 2014: It IS the key to attracting certain type of men, so if that's what I'm looking for, I will dress like a slut. It's like using a putter on the greens and a 9 iron on the tee shot.... (read in full...)

My friends tell me I should give my boyfriend a BJ

Q.   A lot of my friends are wanting me to give my boyfriend a blowjob, and he agreed to wanting me too when i asked. But i feel like we are kind of young for this to be happening. My friends said it was okay because we have been dating for 6 months, but ...

A.   3 May 2014: No. Just no. And tell your friends to stay out of it. Your boyfriend wanting one is a separate issue, that's between you and him and whether you want to...and since you evidently think it's too early (on which you are absolutely right... (read in full...)

Is it weird that my boyfriend of a year and a half had pictures of him and his ex girlfriends on a hard drive that he bought after we started going out?

Q.   I'm keeping my question short and sweet really. Is it weird that my boyfriend of a year and a half had pictures of him and his ex girlfriends on a hard drive that he bought after we started going out? Bearing in mind he's been broken up with o...

A.   3 May 2014: Most people just transfer their content in bulk from hard drive to hard drive. I wouldn't read too much into it.... (read in full...)

My husband never touches or kisses me during sex

Q.   I love my husband very much. We get along great. Sex is my only complaint. I'm very sexual and enjoy sex. My husband doesn't kiss or touch me at all when we have sex. Even when I go down on him, nothing...he says he likes it but never touches me or ...

A.   3 May 2014: Some men just have a low drive, and it gets further depressed around women who seem to want it more than they do. It's kind of sad but I think I can give him the benefit of the's not that he doesn't like you, just that your sexual ... (read in full...)

My boyfriends mom could care less about meeting me?

Q.   So in June it will be 1 year of dating each other and I haven't met his mom nor has he met my parents. Now his mom lives 2 hours away and mine live 30 minutes. But the thing is he'll see him mom usually once a month. She could really care less about ...

A.   15 March 2014: Some mother's just aren't into interfering in their children's life. It's not unusual - as he says, she's just not that into it, so ignore it. There's some girls who'd love to be in your position, I'm guessing. Nothing sours a relationship like the ... (read in full...)

Have any women on here gone to a bar alone?

Q.   I have been on my own for a long time now. It has been bothering me for a while but it has only become a problem recently. I don't have particularly great coping skills and feelings of loneliness have become overwhelming. I really need to make some ...

A.   15 March 2014: It's not the best idea unless you're looking to get laid (and maybe not even then), though I suppose some bars are better than others. A better place to make friends and meet people may be the library, or to join some clubs at your college?... (read in full...)

Do I chase my dream or give it up for my boyfriend?

Q.   Hi there...i had posted a question about my boyfriend getting depressed since he didn't get placed and dream company will be hiring freshers from my campus next week and I was dying for them to my bf is asking me not to attend the ...

A.   19 October 2013: This is your life. Go for the placement drive. No sensible man would advise against it. In the words of a harsher woman than I, "tell him to stop being a depressed little dishrag".... (read in full...)

Are girls turned off by an ugly penis??

Q.   I used to masturbate very much, and this caused my penis to have some dark spots on it. Because Iam tan, it appeared that the spots are post inflammatory hyperpigmentaion. Iam virgin, but had oral sex couples times before it happened. My question ...

A.   19 October 2013: There's no such thing as an ugly penis. But there is such a thing as an unhealthy-looking one, so you may want to see if the spots are related to an infection or something (because I doubt masturbation would be a cause). ... (read in full...)

The man I secretly love finally made out with me while drunk but doesn't remember it

Q.   Being the only Asian girl in a small Midwestern town, I got picked on a lot while I was growing up. It didn’t help that I was small, mousy-looking and extremely shy. I also had a bad case of buck teeth and had to wear these huge, hideous looking ...

A.   19 October 2013: I think you should tell him what happened, and if the cues are right, tell him about your feelings while making it clear you don't want to jeopardize your existing friendship. It will be sad if he is not interested, but you'll never forgive ... (read in full...)

Where does her money go?

Q.   For about 1 month now, I have started dating a stripper that I met in my neighborhood (she's my neighbor's niece). The relationship so far has been going great, her line of work hasn't interfered with our relationship. So far she has been very ho...

A.   2 September 2013: Apart from what the other aunt's have quite accurately described below, a stripper would typically also have significant expenses on upkeep. She probably spends more on cosmetics and clothes than most, and may also have a gym membership or ... (read in full...)

Why do I like the idea of degrading sexual acts? And how could I possibly encourage Mr. Vanilla to participate in them?

Q.   I'm so in love with him; we've been together for two years and our romance is great, our sex isn't. I've never climaxed with any partner and I'm afraid I know why, I think I like the darker side of sex, though I've never tried it. The guy I'm with, ...

A.   25 July 2013: You may want to be more specific with regard to the degrading acts in question. There are lines that can be blurred over time and lines that most men would not cross, vanilla or not. WiseOwl's suggestion is very good though, try roleplay... (read in full...)

Why does my long distance girlfriend still have and know my phone number?!?

Q.   Just wondering why my ex ldr still has my phone number I mean she does not respond back to me and ect just wondering why she would still have it even though she wanted to move on and changed her phone number 5 or 6 times all ready but I still have ...

A.   11 July 2013: How do you know she has your number, and if she's changed hers so many times how are you able to contact her?... (read in full...)

Anyone ever seen a chick magnet in his 50s?

Q.   I am just wondering if anyone else has seen such a thing. There is this guy at work, who is probably about mid 50's. Maybe more. He is more popular than any of us with all the many girls here, including those between 18 and 25. They all lust after ...

A.   11 July 2013: More than I can count :) ... (read in full...)

How do you ask to have an open relationship

Q.   What is the best way to go about asking your boyfriend to allow the relationship to become an open relatonship?...

A.   6 July 2013: There's no option to ease into that question really. You'll have to ask your boyfriend if he's all right with you seeing other people and deal with the possible consequence that the question could end your relationship. It's a question that's s... (read in full...)

Ladies: Is it more difficult to have orgasm if you've been drinking?

Q.   Well, hello, all, it's time to turn the tables :) My question is simple; have any of you ladies noticed that if you drink regularly (1 drink a day for a week or more), orgasm takes longer and is more difficult to attain? I usually don't have...

A.   6 July 2013: Would vary from woman to woman I suppose. I orgasm very easily, intoxicated or otherwise, so I probably wouldn't know anyway.... (read in full...)

I ejaculate immediately after penetration, am I a virgin? What do I do?

Q.   i dont know if i should say i broke my virginity or not because each time i try to hav sex i ejaculate the moment i put on a condom. I started having sex 3 months ago and in most cases i ejaculate immediatly after scared to make l...

A.   6 July 2013: Virginity is a mostly irrelevant state of mind. As for your premature ejaculation problems, most guys I've known who are starting out (and I've taken so many male cherries I can claim to be an expert here) do tend to get very worked up and fire ... (read in full...)

I'm having erections during the day. Is it because I'm young or have a high sex drive?

Q.   Hello I'm 22 yrs old and I haven't had sex yet. My question is: I noticed that I have few erections when asleep and especially in morning which last for half or maybe an hour.also during the day I have erections ( not too many). Does this happen b...

A.   6 July 2013: Quite normal, most guys tend to have those morning erections - or morning wood as I like to call it. Now if we met up, I could let ya know if you have a high sex drive as well,*wink wink* but for now we'll call you normal. ... (read in full...)

She asked me to take her home but then wound up blowing me off. I thought it was rude!

Q.   I met a girl in a bar last week and we hit it off - I am 25 and she is 22. I gave her my number and she got in touch with me. We had dinner on Tuesday and she said it was the nicest date she ever had. I stayed at her house after and took to work...

A.   6 July 2013: Sounds more like a misunderstanding. Less texting more talking, maybe? Am going to have to say I largely agree with @chigirl.... (read in full...)

I feel slightly weird that my girlfriend follows my best friend on Instagram

Q.   Is it normal for girlfriend to follow your friends on instagram? My best friend is on Instagram. I don't have an account so I really don't know too much about it. But my GF does have instagram, and I noticed that she follows my best friend. Not...

A.   6 July 2013: Hardly means anything. No different than adding someone on Facebook. And not at all a sly way of letting someone know you like them. Maybe he just takes good photos?... (read in full...)

Would you change your religion for love?

Q.   Ok,this is probably not the smartest question, having been spurred by the vision of a Sex and the City rerun, but I'd be curious to know the opinion of my esteemed DC colleagues and readers : would you change religion for love ? why, or why not ...

A.   6 July 2013: NO. Mostly because I'm not a believer, but even otherwise I don't think it's a decision that should be taken for any reason other than a fundamental change in one's own belief system.... (read in full...)

What should I do about my fiance lying about porn?

Q.   when me and my boyfriend started dated we made it very clear what we expect from each other. Together we made the commitment to be a christian couple and live that kind of life. I just had a baby with him and he asked me to marry him, i said yes, ...

A.   24 March 2013: The problem with unrealistic expectations is that they are unrealistic. He should not be lying to you, and if that's a big deal, sure, re-look at the relationship. Incidentally, that's the advise I'd give your boyfriend as well. ... (read in full...)

Does anyone else share my fantasy for men that are much older than me?

Q.   I am a 21 year old female, and I find myself fantasizing about much, much older men. They are normally well over 60, and usually the older or uglier they look, the more the fantasy turns me on. I'm not saying elderly men are ugly by default, but ...

A.   23 March 2013: The whole point of a fantasy is that its something you probably don't think is normal or else you might be doing it. I find older men attractive myself, and I've been sharing my bed regularly with a man who is not 67 and would not win any beauty ... (read in full...)

Am I reading the signals right? Or am I in the friendzone?

Q.   Hi there boys and girls! I need your help, anyway here it goes. There's this girl I meet at work just a month ago. I'm starting to like / have a crush on her. She's so beautiful that like in some ways, I haven't felt this way before. But the ...

A.   23 March 2013: She has a boyfriend. Until that situation changes, don't try to read too much into signals. I never tell men I'm interested in that I have a boyfriend unless I mean to take them home for the night, in which case I suppose they should be told about ... (read in full...)

Is it normal to want anal sex with my wife?

Q.   Is it normal to want anal sex with my wife, she's got a lovely arse and she's the only person I want it with, we have been together for 20 + years and have a fantastic sex life, I'm just wondering if my penis would be too big for her, it's 6 ins but ...

A.   23 March 2013: Well it's normal to want it, but it would be just as normal for her not to want to. Most women don't, except in the high-fantasy world of porn, where they are essentially acting. Try to have a conversation about it, and if she isn't interest... (read in full...)

My wife is 7 months pregnant. Is it normal for me to feel aroused around her?

Q.   I have been married to my wife for two years, now she is 7months pregnant,Is it normal for me to feel horny and aroused wheneva I look at her or touches her?...

A.   19 February 2013: Oh yes, very very normal. A lot of men find their partners very arousing while pregnant.... (read in full...)

Boyfriend always accuses me of having sex with other men but then gets off on it

Q.   This might seem strange but the guy I'm currently with is extremely jealous , through out our relationship of nearly a year he has constantly accused me of havin sex with other guys. If I go out for a few hours and am late back he would take me to ...

A.   19 February 2013: This is pretty weird behavior. Is he controlling in other ways? Men like this are generally not a good idea to look for relationships with.... (read in full...)

Will my boyfriend judge my family if I tell him about my abusive father?

Q.   Hey, I'l get straight to the point,I'v never had a daughter-father relationship with my dad,we never shared,talked about problems,I always soo scared of him cuz he was an abusive father and as a child I heard him shout and raise his hands on my mo...

A.   19 February 2013: It is human nature to be judgmental. So yes, he will probably form an opinion. The question is, what is the opinion you think he should form? What do you fear will happen?... (read in full...)

Who could care and have feelings for 3 year affair?

Q.   Is it easy for a man to have a 3yr sex fling with a woman and care nothing for her? My husband has been sleeping with this hoe for 3yrs.I know its only sex. She now has feelings for him but he cares nothing for her. She can't get that through her ...

A.   25 January 2013: Sounds to me like he's been stringing both of you along for a while now. I'd re-assess how you look at the role your husband has played here. Whether she has feeling for him or not, carrying on an affair for 3 years suggests your husband, at least, ... (read in full...)

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