When do you completely let all your walls down and let a man love you?
Q. I just read a quote that spoke to me. "Never give all yourself to someone who has not made a life commitment to you...dating should not have the same benefits as marriage" Well I truly believe in this quote but question myself. I've been hurt bad...
A. 28 October 2014: Thats excellent you took time off to heal. Depending on what has happened in your past you may need counseling or time to heal. Seems you are getting there to open up again which is great just make sure u embrace a man and dont withdraw once u feel ... (read in full...)
Heard rumors that she's a virgin. After dating for 5 months, how to bring up the topic of sex?
Q. I have been dating this amazing girl for 5 months, I am 24 and she is 20. We get along great and connect very well, however in the time we have been dating the subject of sex (or anything remotely close to the subject) has not been brought up yet. I ...
A. 28 October 2014: You are being overly sensitive not considerate. Bro youre acting like a wuss here. Shes waiting for u to bring the subject up. Ease into it by creating sexual tension ie making jokes about it and addressing indirectly. To women this screams ... (read in full...)
I'm having doubts about the relationship because my boyfriend drinks to excess
Q. Hi. I've been with my boyfriend for 3 years. He is intelligent and funny and fun to be with and we share many interests. What we don't share is his interest and committment to drinking on a daily basis, and at least 3 times a week being drunk to the ...
A. 24 October 2014: This sounds like alcoholism as was the case with my ex. This is an addiction and he needs professional help and treatment.If I were you id give him an ultimatum get treatment and ill support or refuse and i leave your life. It will get worse if you ... (read in full...)
Should I go for it or not? He knows I found him attractive in his youth, but he's not as attractive any more.
Q. Dear Cupid, There is a guy I have met on Facebook - who was absolutely gorgeous looking a few years ago. He wants to meet up with for a possible relationship - but the thing is - he is now middle aged and not looking half as good as in his youth...
A. 21 October 2014: Go check him out and keep convo casual. Nothing wrong with not feeling unattracted some men dont know how to care for their bodies over years. Im ahead of them definitely. Stick him in friend zone it would not be bad.... (read in full...)
I like my job but my boss and I just don't seem to click. Suggestions to improve things?
Q. My boss is very young (24) and new to the boss job (but not new to the workplace, shes worked here 3.5 yrs) shes good at her job, is lucky to have it at her age, and I dont dislike her but wondet why shes so cliquey, her age maybe? shes supe...
A. 21 October 2014: My instinct says shes being passive aggressive with you about something and as a result you dont receive the same communication. Does she favor others over you in terms of maybe buying lunch or granting vacation time or something else? if so thats a ... (read in full...)
Should I tell her I've never kissed a girl before?
Q. I have a date with a girl this weekend but I'm nervous because I've never actually kissed a girl before. I'm not saying we're going to kiss on the first date but if it goes well, who knows. What I want to know is, if we do kiss, should I tell her ...
A. 21 October 2014: No do not tell her. That is soft. cmon man. Just make eye contact smile hold a door or two but dont pick up her tampon if it falls out of her purse. Be a gentleman but not a kiss ass. Do not show up with bears n flowers and all this crap. Use that ... (read in full...)
Am I trying too hard to get this girl?
Q. Hi there. Quick recap: Met a girl at a bar and we hung out the entire night. Danced, laughed, etc. I drove her home and we kissed outside her door. Made out up the staircase almost to her main door entrance. Not only made out but she let me put m...
A. 21 October 2014: oh man stay away. this girl is damaged as all hell. she IS that type of girl. Trust me. And shes going thru a 'man' phase that involves games. Your persistence may scare her off. Casual encounter on the first nite meeting? Shes not looking for ... (read in full...)
I love my husband but I've fallen out of lust with him. Will the feelings come back?
Q. Hello everyone Thanks for offering advice I've been married for 10 years like everyone we've had a few ups and downs but the bottom line is we love each other very much and I'd say my hb is my best friend, again like many relationships ou...
A. 21 October 2014: I hate this. Women not coming forth with something out of fear of response. Tell him you dont find him sexually attractive. If hes a man and he should be he will keep any emotion from your honesty out. Is he overweight? What is turning you off? Talk ... (read in full...)
Enjoyed our first date together.Is it too much to send her a card wishing her well?
Q. Just a quick one. Went out with someone (first date if you will), and had planned to meet up again soon. She's since postponed this, I think she has a lot on with work - stress etc. Is it too much to send her a card wishing her well? Have sort ...
A. 19 October 2014: Over the top. youll scare her off.... (read in full...)
My husband says he's cool with me having relations with other women. How have others handled a similar situation as this?
Q. My husband and I have been married for 5 years. We have had many ups and downs but despite these we are still together and communicate with one another very openly and honestly. Lately things have been a bit rubbish and he hasn't been very attracte...
A. 14 October 2014: Hes cheating. Even before your encounter with your friend.... (read in full...)
It's taken me four years, a nearly broken engagement, and me making out with another guy to realize that I want to give my fiance his ultimate fantasy: two girls giving him a blow job at the same time
Q. First, a little background that could help with any advice givings. I ask that no one judges my actions as I already know that I screwed up and believe me, I am working hard to better everything again. My fiance has only ever been with one woman ...
A. 12 October 2014: It appears both of you want something serious right now and threesomes are casual. It could damage things.... (read in full...)
I feel like I can't compete with my boyfriend's threesome! Should I tell him?
Q. Hi everyone, I have gotten myself into a really, really stupid situation here. My boyfriend and I have been in a very passionate and loving relationship for about two months and I'll just skip the part where I tell you all how perfect everythi...
A. 25 September 2014: I have breaking news for you. Hes seen you as a threesome girl and threesome girl only, not a reltshp girl. Hes clearly still in party and have fun mindset otherwise why bring it up? It has no relevance to anything and hes stupid. Save yourself ... (read in full...)
Confused...no more Mr. Wonderful
Q. I met a man who treated me like a queen..it was truly a fairy tale. Every morning I woke I would have a Good Morning beautiful text..ect. Throughout the course of our relationship he surprised me with an expensive car because he said he had the ...
A. 22 September 2014: Hes probably seeing another woman but is like most men too ashamed to say so. His behavior is def erratic and seems like he cowered away from you. If he isnt seeing another woman id be surprised.... (read in full...)
My boyfriend went out with a female coworker and I didn't like it. Should I go out with a male to see how he likes it?
Q. Last night my boyfriend told me that he had a super nice dinner with a co-worker/friend because they were leaving. He then told me how the waiter thought they were engaged and he laughed and told me how he said no. Wait what? The friend was a gir...
A. 18 September 2014: If hes mature hes testing you to see how serious you are by how jealous you get which is good. Or if hes a serious a$$hole hes probably messing with your head and manipulating your emotions. Some men enjoy watching women get angry. Its sick. Use ... (read in full...)
First date ideas???
Q. Hi I recently asked for a girls phone number, I work with her occasionally and we have a good working relationship. I really like her and I'm nervous about asking her out on a date I need ideas something simple and fun. Trouble is she going away in ...
A. 16 September 2014: Get rid of your jitters. Its wussy women find it that way. Id work on creating attraction. A good dinner is ideal. Eye contact n converse a bit. Avoid any place flashy or mum. Aim for average. No roses or chocolates or any of that. It will come ... (read in full...)
What was the matter with this blind-date guy?
Q. I went on a blind-date the other day, I had only talked to him on the phone prior to meeting, and a friend set us up. He invited me to come with him and our mutual friend to a theater show. They're in a group, and get free tickets to this one show. ...
A. 14 June 2014: This guy is full of games he will damage u n mess with ur head. Hes in short, an idiot. Avoid him.... (read in full...)
She got drunk and slept with someone -- do I forgive her?
Q. Me and my girlfriend have been dating for 8 months, never had an argument never fought and we were completely honest to each other for the whole time. We trusted each other very well we bond great and its like she is the perfect one for me and I ...
A. 21 May 2014: Shes bad news. I agree with anonymous about men approaching is not out of the blue. She clearly has her temptations and she finally gave into one. People know how they react to alcohol and shes no exception. She should have known better. You sound ... (read in full...)
I feel too intensely
Q. Anyone else wish they couldn't feel emotions? I feel like everything hurts me. I'm an intense person, I get close quickly and they end up hurting me. I've never been able to have a relationship for more than a year. It takes me ages to get o...
A. 15 May 2014: Youll get used to all the shit out there eventually youll create a shield so thick nothing will get thru. Not even love. If thats where u find peace stick with it.... (read in full...)
How can me and my family help our brother after his divorce? He has given up on life.
Q. I know this isn't much of a relationship question but we really need help. My brother was married for about 7 years and divorced. He tried to be strong but after a while he completely gave up and now he has no self esteem. We as a family have no i...
A. 6 May 2014: Healing can be a long process. He's trying to move on and the divorce is proof. Him maintaining contact shows he's still hanging on a bit and that's because of feelings. If ur bro is an emotional guy this is normal instead of criticizing his ... (read in full...)
What thoughts comes to a woman’s mind when a 25 year old guy says that he has never been in a relationship and is a virgin?
Q. Just looking for some straight forward answers. Question: What thoughts comes to a woman’s mind (as well as guys) when a 25 year old guy says that he has never been in a relationship and is a virgin. Why: Initially, it was a religiou...
A. 6 May 2014: I like your confidence. Now gain some sexually. You seem to have a recipe down for attracting women now use it fully! If u r waiting because of a religious reason thats ok but if ur just waiting to be in love n have feeling etc n all that soft bs, ... (read in full...)
Was I right to conclude that he isn't over his ex?
Q. I am so confused. I met a guy I used to date 25 years ago on facebook, we fell immediately back in love. He is separated and from what both he and his family tells me, his soon to be ex is a horrible person. I have witness first hand. She texts ...
A. 6 May 2014: Good call. Stay away from this pair they are toxic.... (read in full...)
Woman I'm sleeping with is becoming weird and clingy, how do I handle it?
Q. Okay, So I have a little dilemma. I've been sleeping with this woman I met. She's cool and everything and when we hang out we have a nice time, but she's becoming extraordinarily clingy. She texts things like "Do you miss me? What do you miss...
A. 30 April 2014: Shes damaged. Very. And things will get damn dramatic if you hang around. Unless youre maury povich get out of this and fast.... (read in full...)
Regaining sexual confidence after wife cheated
Q. I have a question on confidence lost for a man after my wife of 20 years cheated on me. Basically we had been together for 20 years, I was 17 when we met, she was 16. About 2 and a half years ago she cheated on me with an old friend of hers. ...
A. 31 March 2014: For me casual sex is the best thing to gain sexual confidence. Bad of your wife to cheat. Do what you think is best and get counseling if needed. Good luck.... (read in full...)
Should I stop hiring sex workers?
Q. I'm 27 and have never been on a date. I attribute the utter lack of romance in my life to the fact that I was born with a learning disability that has somewhat impeded my social skills. In order to compensate for the absence of such intimacy in my ...
A. 4 March 2014: You can still develop social skills bud seek counselling or read books heck private message me I'm great at them. As for hiring out, until u feel confident id stay with them. Experience matters man I wont lie and in my general experience size does ... (read in full...)
I ruined my boyfriend's life because I didn't lose my virginity to him
Q. Hello all, my boyfriend and I have been together for 3years 3months, just recently he found out the guy I lost my virginity to was 20yr old and I was only 16, I regret it completely and know it was a huge mistake when I was immature young and drunk. ...
A. 3 February 2014: Very unmasculine. Turn off im sure. Who cares. Hes failing to look at the big picture with you and hes wrong for judging. Do not let him damage you. End this and its problem if he cant deal with the breakup not yours. ... (read in full...)
NEVER will do anything for a woman unless there is sexual intention involved.
Q. I had a discussion with a friend today about my upcoming trip, and she said that men NEVER will do anyhting for a woman unless there is sexual intention involved. I told her that I had and have plenty of guy friends. She asked me to think under w...
A. 28 January 2014: Yea he only wants sex. Hes kept u at a boundary but maintained friendliness. Also a guy wouldnt invest his time if he knew u were from a differen countryt. Chances of that reltshp are slim to none. If ur not into casual sex this trip isnt for u and ... (read in full...)
Why do girls suddenly distance themselves from a guy, when things seem to be going great?
Q. Dear cupid I have experienced during my dating that sometimes girls suddenly distance themselves without any warning or explanation whilst you are dating a girl. (She doesn't like anyone else and she's single ). Why the sudden change in attitude w...
A. 28 January 2014: In my experience it was because I was a gentleman and the girl feared in getting close so she pulled away. She told me I did nothing wrong and it was all her. In any case dont beat urself up stay on ur game.... (read in full...)
Why do girls lose interest?
Q. This isn't a question about a specific scenario but rather a general question in regards to romantic relationships. Because I have seen this happening to me and to some male friends often (and it is a recurrent topic here in DearCupid.com). ...
A. 3 January 2014: In my case the woman had a fear of getting close due to her past. She became distant nearly instantly because of our intensity n feelings surfacing. You gotta feel things out and that comes with experience. Stay up.... (read in full...)
How can I be myself when I have no confidence?
Q. I am a 36 year old man. I Have no confidence when it comes to chatting to ladies. People always tell me to just be myself but that seems to me like i am not good enough. Any advice would be very appreciated. ...
A. 31 December 2013: Be yourself? No dont. Tweak ur personality a bit. Meaning: adapt. For me chatting with women n attracting is easy but its done consciously not naturally. I think about everything from body language to words when with a lady. This doesnt create ... (read in full...)
What do women in particular think of a guy who's 30 and never had a girlfriend?
Q. Anyway, I want to hear some opinions. Guys are welcome to comment, but I think that girls may be able to offer me some valuable insight as to what exactly my problem is, and whether or not anything can be done about it. I've always been rath...
A. 18 December 2013: My man in your culture it is a huge turn off. Yes a guy can be kind sweet generous n all that which women but what youre doing isnt masculine to them. Its soft. Too soft. I say this respectfully. Solution: Get laid anyway u can. Read books on ... (read in full...)
My wife just wants to party!
Q. My wife lately start party with her girlfriend mostly every weekend.when i tell her to stop her get upset with me and she dosen't want me to touch her in bed or even to have sex.Please help....
A. 14 December 2013: Oh man im sorry I do have a strong feeling shes seeing another guy. Does she attack ur personality? She seems immature anyway man if shes partying a lot. Shes in fun mode not family. Good luck.... (read in full...)
I want to date my step sister but is this okay?
Q. I want to date my step sister. I am 24 and she is 25 and she has 2 kids and so do i. I want to tell her but i dont know how. She is so sexy but that is not why i want to be with her. We see a loot in the same whey. we joke about us dating and having ...
A. 6 November 2013: Tough situation. Blood wise no issue but the fact shes common law family member can present cultural norm issues within some family. Id talk to ur parents but im sure u r afraid of their reaction use ur best judgment.... (read in full...)
My boyfriend isn't able to cum by vaginal sex. Why?
Q. My bf is very sexually aggressive and likes to dominate and humiliate me sexually and that's okay with me. The thing that bothers me though is that he only ejaculates if I stimulate him orally for over 30 minutes or if we do anal. Why that? He is ...
A. 4 November 2013: Might be lack of tightness or psychological on his end.... (read in full...)
He's a great guy, except for his sex drive
Q. I am frustrated beyond belief and the worst part is, I will NEVER EVER cheat. My boyfriend (who is, admittedly, a very good guy) and I have been together almost 3.5 years. No engagement ring yet and he always claims it's money which I get because ...
A. 31 October 2013: Hey doll I see ur frustrations hes simply not reciprocating. Ive dealt similar with women as I too have a high sex drive. My solution: Stop giving. I can satisy myself but him obviously enjoying bjs from u n u taking them away might spark his ... (read in full...)
My husband just left me for a younger woman
Q. i am feeling like a total fool. i was informed last night that my husband of 23 years wants a divorce, he has a baby by a girl that is 24 years old and she is expecting another one by him again... yes you read this right the baby she just had is 4 ...
A. 19 October 2013: Yes get a lawyer. F§§§ this guy. He screwed u emotionally now screw him back. Very sorry about this. Absolutely horrid.... (read in full...)
Amazing fantasies of how hot our three-way could be!
Q. I am an “out bisexual woman” but men often mistake me as lesbian. I have a gal-friend (who’s just a friend) that I’m emotionally close to, so much so that we often hug and kiss on the cheek. She recently hooked up with a hot great guy that I know ...
A. 14 October 2013: Anything involving emotion in a threesome is not advised. Many issues can potentially arise including jealousy.... (read in full...)
Do men like to do the chasing ?
Q. I'm hoping for some input, male and female answers welcome! I've basically realised that I have a really bad complex about being rejected when it comes to blokes! I've been hurt in the past, whereby a male friend who I was at uni with strung me ...
A. 8 October 2013: If I were u I wouldnt think about dating. Seems u have issues that need to be resolved before u start dating again.... (read in full...)
My boyfriend says I don't have enough experience
Q. My boyfriend told me last night that he is concerned that I don't have enough sexual experience for him to get more serious about our relationship. He is concerned that since I have only been in one other serious relationship that I cant be ready ...
A. 25 September 2013: That is really shallow. What an a##hole. Get rid of him.... (read in full...)
He would make plans with me, then disappear and turn off his cell.
Q. hello I have a guy friend.he met me once. he would always make plans with me. but he wouldnt turn up on the day we make plans. Its always he who makes the plans. but finally when i call him on the day he made the plan his cell is off. goes direct...
A. 21 September 2013: Hes playing a huge mind game. Testing ur interest. He sounds possibly manipulative. Be careful.... (read in full...)
Is this a good idea to ask out a girl to homecoming?
Q. Homecoming is just around the corner and I've been trying to figure out how I want to ask my girl. At my school you can simply just ask. It's got to be done is some special way. The girl I want to ask is a really good softball player and practices ...
A. 21 September 2013: Women hate the soft sh## kid. No matter what they say. It creates affection not attraction thus turns them off. Dont put in any effort just ask her straight.... (read in full...)
How can I help my girlfriend feel less "broken" and regain confidence after a previously emotionally abusive relationship?
Q. A little over 5 months ago I met my "dream girl", and our relationship has been going really well so far. I'm 24 and she is 22. She doesn't seem to have a whole lot of confidence in herself though. I asked her about it in the nicest way possible and ...
A. 15 September 2013: Excellent. Be patient. Continue to encourage support n compliment. Dont kiss her ass but compliment n if she achieves something buy her a small gift. Continue to be a consistent gentleman!!... (read in full...)
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